Latest / Mic Drop Comedy / Mic Drop Comedy San Diego _ Comedian Bret Ernst(MP3_320K)

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Mic Drop Comedy San Diego _ Comedian Bret Ernst(MP3_320K) · Mic Drop Comedy

• 0:14
  Speaker 1: Body what's going on man uh i was gonna say
• 0:19
  Speaker 1: um so we have you here on the mic drop
• 0:22
  Speaker 1: podcast and we wanted to go over like just getting
• 0:25
  Speaker 1: to know you and you know figuring out because you're
• 0:28
  Speaker 1: going to be here at the mic drop pretty soon Yeah,
• 0:31
  Speaker 1: I was looking for my calendar. It's, I think, July
• 0:35
  Speaker 1: 2nd and 3rd.
• 0:36
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it's July 4th weekend.
• 0:39
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Which is so awesome because, remember, have you ever
• 0:45
  Speaker 1: had to do a show during 4th of July day?
• 0:50
  Speaker 2: Unfortunately, yeah.
• 0:52
  Speaker 1: Those are the worst. It's the worst when you have
• 0:54
  Speaker 1: the drinking holiday to have to do.
• 0:56
  Speaker 2: Yeah, so yeah, I'm there July 2nd and 3rd. Yeah,
• 0:59
  Speaker 2: that's correct.
• 1:00
  Speaker 1: You are correct, sir. You are correct. Yeah, no. It's
• 1:05
  Speaker 1: the worst. Okay, so here's a couple questions. Because I've
• 1:08
  Speaker 1: known you for years now. But I was like always
• 1:11
  Speaker 1: interested in, because I met you at a movie theater.
• 1:15
  Speaker 1: And I remember telling you, I go, hey, I seen
• 1:17
  Speaker 1: you in this theater on the Vince Vaughn Wild West
• 1:22
  Speaker 1: comedy documentary. Now, how did that come about?
• 1:28
  Speaker 2: So there was a show in L.A. that that was
• 1:32
  Speaker 2: like for four years was arguably the best show in
• 1:35
  Speaker 2: town outside of like the comedy clubs, the comedy store,
• 1:38
  Speaker 2: Laugh Factory, Improv. And it was called Dublin's and it
• 1:42
  Speaker 2: was at Dublin's. It was every Tuesday night. And it
• 1:46
  Speaker 2: was just I mean, I can't explain it. I heard
• 1:49
  Speaker 2: they're trying to do a documentary about it. And I
• 1:53
  Speaker 2: was a regular performer there. And, uh, I met Ahmed
• 1:58
  Speaker 2: and Jay Davis ran the room and, uh, Vince Vaughn
• 2:01
  Speaker 2: and Ahmed Ahmed were like best friends. And Vince was
• 2:04
  Speaker 2: in the room one night. And, uh, you know, he
• 2:07
  Speaker 2: saw my set, we were talking in the back hallway and, uh,
• 2:10
  Speaker 2: immediately it went to, uh, sports, you know, cause we're
• 2:13
  Speaker 2: both big sports guys. And, uh, we just became friends.
• 2:18
  Speaker 2: And then he did, it was all he did. I
• 2:22
  Speaker 2: met him when, uh, before he did old school. And
• 2:25
  Speaker 2: then we were friends and then he did wedding crashers.
• 2:27
  Speaker 2: And then he had this idea to do a live
• 2:30
  Speaker 2: comedy show, uh, for the troops in Dewey beach, Delaware.
• 2:35
  Speaker 2: And cause they, they were, that's where they shot. Um,
• 2:38
  Speaker 2: wedding crashers was in like that area in DC area.
• 2:42
  Speaker 2: And we did a, a, a benefit for the troops. And, uh,
• 2:48
  Speaker 2: then he came up with the idea of doing the tour.
• 2:52
  Speaker 2: and he shot it as a documentary. In fact, it
• 2:54
  Speaker 2: was the project right that he did right after wedding crashers. And, uh,
• 2:58
  Speaker 2: you know, it was, it was at that time, I
• 3:01
  Speaker 2: believe it was the biggest theatrical release of a documentary,
• 3:04
  Speaker 2: but what killed us was the SAG went on strike
• 3:08
  Speaker 2: and the writers went on strike. So, uh, when we
• 3:11
  Speaker 2: released the movie, there was no way to do press.
• 3:15
  Speaker 2: Oh shit.
• 3:16
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 3:16
  Speaker 2: Because, you know, we weren't doing the late night shows.
• 3:19
  Speaker 2: Vince wasn't doing that. Cause you know, we, we, we're
• 3:21
  Speaker 2: all comics and writers and actors. So we respected the
• 3:25
  Speaker 2: strike and, and it basically, uh, there was no way
• 3:29
  Speaker 2: to promote it. So it was in the theater, I
• 3:31
  Speaker 2: think for like two weeks. And then, um, it lived
• 3:35
  Speaker 2: again on, on, uh, cable. But, um, but, uh, I mean,
• 3:41
  Speaker 2: it's arguably the most fun I've had in comedy. Yeah.
• 3:48
  Speaker 1: I mean, it looks fun and it's funny cause it's like, well,
• 3:50
  Speaker 1: I mean, cause also too, like you can't script it
• 3:52
  Speaker 1: cause it's a documentary, but like, um, having hurricane Katrina
• 3:56
  Speaker 1: happened while you're doing it.
• 3:59
  Speaker 2: Yeah, no, there was a lot of things. Cause the
• 4:01
  Speaker 2: goal was this wanted to bring like New York or
• 4:05
  Speaker 2: LA comedy, you know, a major city comedy to smaller areas.
• 4:09
  Speaker 2: And even though, you know, we did bigger cities like Chicago, we,
• 4:12
  Speaker 2: we hit areas like, uh, I think Tulsa and, you know, like, uh,
• 4:17
  Speaker 2: the Midwest. We traveled all the way through the, through
• 4:20
  Speaker 2: the South. Um, then we ended, we, we started in
• 4:25
  Speaker 2: Chicago and ended in Chicago. And, uh, we did 30,
• 4:29
  Speaker 2: 30 cities in a row. I mean, we did Bakersfield, California,
• 4:34
  Speaker 2: try to think, uh, El Paso. We just hit every
• 4:37
  Speaker 2: city on this route. Yeah. So we lived on a
• 4:41
  Speaker 2: tour bus for a month.
• 4:43
  Speaker 1: I'm sorry. Go ahead.
• 4:45
  Speaker 2: No, no. They filmed everything. Everything from us drinking because
• 4:50
  Speaker 2: we were sponsored by Budweiser and EA Sports. I got
• 4:57
  Speaker 2: to tell you, I may be speaking out of turn.
• 5:02
  Speaker 2: I don't know if this is a fact, but I
• 5:03
  Speaker 2: think it is. Vince is like a ranked Madden player.
• 5:07
  Speaker 1: Oh, really?
• 5:08
  Speaker 2: Yeah. He plays online. A lot of people he's playing
• 5:11
  Speaker 2: don't even know they're playing him at that time. I
• 5:15
  Speaker 2: don't know if he's still playing Madden, but my God,
• 5:19
  Speaker 2: the guy was just unbeatable.
• 5:22
  Speaker 1: Had his own playbook. I remember playing someone one time.
• 5:24
  Speaker 1: They had their own playbook, and I was like, oh,
• 5:26
  Speaker 1: I'm not. Never mind. I'm not winning.
• 5:30
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 5:31
  Speaker 1: Yeah, no, because that was a trip, man.
• 5:35
  Speaker 2: We had tournaments on the bus, right?
• 5:38
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 5:38
  Speaker 2: So the people in the dock was me, Sebastian Maniscalco. uh,
• 5:44
  Speaker 2: I met, I met in John Caparulo and then John dominated,
• 5:50
  Speaker 2: dominated NBA, uh, NBA, not NBA, uh, NBA live. I
• 5:56
  Speaker 2: was good at fight night and me and Sebastian, Sebastian
• 6:00
  Speaker 2: played FIFA, but Madden was, you know, Madden's the crown jewel.
• 6:05
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 6:06
  Speaker 2: That's the one that everybody wanted. And, uh, cap is
• 6:10
  Speaker 2: a phenomenal Madden player, but, He couldn't beat Vince, man.
• 6:14
  Speaker 2: And Vince talks so much shit when he's winning, bro.
• 6:18
  Speaker 1: Well, yeah.
• 6:20
  Speaker 2: He's like Hannibal Lecter. He gets in your head. It's great.
• 6:25
  Speaker 1: It was a lot of fun. It's so funny because
• 6:27
  Speaker 1: you say that, and I go back to swingers where
• 6:30
  Speaker 1: they're playing hockey, and he's just goating, pissing the other
• 6:34
  Speaker 1: actor off. And it's like, yeah, that's pretty much what
• 6:36
  Speaker 1: you do, though, in life. Because you have brothers. You
• 6:39
  Speaker 1: guys played, and I'm pretty sure You fucking, you know,
• 6:42
  Speaker 1: whoever wins. Oh, yeah. I had cousins. There was four boys,
• 6:47
  Speaker 1: and they would play. If you lose, the other one
• 6:50
  Speaker 1: gets to pick off one of your scabs on you.
• 6:53
  Speaker 1: I was like, what the fuck?
• 6:55
  Speaker 2: Well, we had me and my brother and our friends.
• 6:57
  Speaker 2: We would play. You know, I grew up in apartments.
• 7:00
  Speaker 2: So we would have, like, you know, me and my
• 7:02
  Speaker 2: brother always shared a room. I actually shared a room
• 7:04
  Speaker 2: with my older brother, too. But then when we had
• 7:07
  Speaker 2: these tournaments, I was, like, 20, 21. right and uh
• 7:13
  Speaker 2: nba jams we i loved hockey on sega and then
• 7:17
  Speaker 2: uh what was it super tech mobile for sega but
• 7:21
  Speaker 2: we had a burger king crown right and we all
• 7:25
  Speaker 2: came up with names yeah like um i my theme
• 7:29
  Speaker 2: song was the song from uh Saturday Night Fever, the
• 7:33
  Speaker 2: open sesame. Then it would go, boom. And then I'd
• 7:40
  Speaker 2: come in with the crown, and we came up with
• 7:45
  Speaker 2: our own names. I was Chela. And we would just play.
• 7:56
  Speaker 2: If you lost, you know, my grandmother had this blanket.
• 7:59
  Speaker 2: We called it the blanket. right so if you lost
• 8:04
  Speaker 2: you had to wrap yourself in the itch blanket.
• 8:10
  Speaker 1: That's fucking ridiculous oh man i would suck i remember
• 8:12
  Speaker 1: that did you hear me or are we lagging no
• 8:14
  Speaker 1: i can hear you you said the itchy blanket if
• 8:16
  Speaker 1: you lost you'd have to be wrapped up in the
• 8:17
  Speaker 1: itchy blanket but i was thinking about that too because
• 8:19
  Speaker 1: like yeah they that that blanket i think everyone's has
• 8:21
  Speaker 1: a version of that either itchy or hot ass blanket
• 8:24
  Speaker 1: too where it's like why what why is this comfortable to.
• 8:28
  Speaker 2: Anybody Yeah, the itchy blanket was awful, man. And you
• 8:33
  Speaker 2: had to wrap yourself in it and then we rub
• 8:36
  Speaker 2: each other. My little brother, really quick. My little brother
• 8:45
  Speaker 2: never lost an NBA jam. He has never lost an
• 8:49
  Speaker 2: NBA jams.
• 8:50
  Speaker 1: Ever. He's undefeated. He's on fire still.
• 8:53
  Speaker 2: Undefeated.
• 8:54
  Speaker 1: Never.
• 8:56
  Speaker 2: I'm not kidding. We'll get him on the phone. He
• 8:58
  Speaker 2: has never lost an NBA and he has played I'd
• 9:02
  Speaker 2: say 50 different people, hundreds of times. And he's never
• 9:06
  Speaker 2: lost that. That kid has the crown in NBA jams.
• 9:09
  Speaker 1: You're walking. It's like, it's all funny. Your younger brother,
• 9:12
  Speaker 1: you're walking around them like Fred Savage was his younger
• 9:14
  Speaker 1: brother on the wizard. Do you remember the wizard? The
• 9:16
  Speaker 1: Nintendo video game?
• 9:17
  Speaker 2: Yeah, of course.
• 9:17
  Speaker 1: Our TV. Yeah. It's like, that's your little brother.
• 9:22
  Speaker 2: You know, what's funny, Carlos?
• 9:23
  Speaker 1: What's that?
• 9:24
  Speaker 2: I'm in my, I'm in my twenties doing this. And
• 9:28
  Speaker 2: then on the bus, I was in my thirties with
• 9:31
  Speaker 2: other 30 year old men.
• 9:34
  Speaker 1: Fucking gaming video games it's the best it's the ultimate
• 9:38
  Speaker 1: uh uh problem solver too it's like yo we'll settle
• 9:41
  Speaker 1: this right now let's get on the sticks real quick
• 9:43
  Speaker 1: and then you know what you call you pick the
• 9:44
  Speaker 1: movie or yada yada yeah that's how i said a
• 9:46
  Speaker 1: lot of arguments too or make or make money.
• 9:49
  Speaker 2: We had a hundred dollars it was this kid gordon
• 9:52
  Speaker 2: uh that uh he played receiver when i was up
• 9:55
  Speaker 2: in up in college and he was talking all this
• 9:59
  Speaker 2: shit about nba Jams. And my little brother was up
• 10:01
  Speaker 2: there with me. And I'm like, you can't beat my brother.
• 10:05
  Speaker 2: So we had money on the game. This kid walked
• 10:09
  Speaker 2: in with a backpack and his own controller.
• 10:13
  Speaker 1: Right?
• 10:13
  Speaker 2: You know, like when people bring their own stick in
• 10:16
  Speaker 2: the pool hall?
• 10:17
  Speaker 1: Yeah. So he started breaking it out.
• 10:19
  Speaker 2: Hard-ass mom and he came away he came in like
• 10:23
  Speaker 2: what what plugged in the controller and my brother smoked.
• 10:27
  Speaker 1: Him bro he was like he's on fire.
• 10:33
  Speaker 2: Well bro it it was i can't even i don't
• 10:35
  Speaker 2: even know how the fuck the kid's that.
• 10:37
  Speaker 1: Good it's nuts and i you ever unplugged the controller
• 10:41
  Speaker 1: when they're playing yeah i got pissed off and unplugged
• 10:43
  Speaker 1: it and walked out fucking uh No, I was going
• 10:48
  Speaker 1: to say, oh, here was another question too that I had. Okay,
• 10:51
  Speaker 1: so especially like with the, because you did Comedy Central
• 10:54
  Speaker 1: had a special on there. Yeah. And was that prior
• 10:58
  Speaker 1: or after the Vince Vaughn thing?
• 11:04
  Speaker 2: No, it was after because I shot mine in 2009.
• 11:07
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and that was so awesome too. Talk about how
• 11:12
  Speaker 1: that came about.
• 11:13
  Speaker 2: My premium blend was before that. My premium blend was
• 11:16
  Speaker 2: before the wild west tour.
• 11:18
  Speaker 1: That's what I was thinking about the premium blend. That's,
• 11:19
  Speaker 1: that's what I was going to wonder. I like, I
• 11:21
  Speaker 1: wanted to know how that came about too. Like, because this,
• 11:23
  Speaker 1: that like this thing in comedy is like, yeah, like the,
• 11:26
  Speaker 1: the road at that point, like at that time too.
• 11:29
  Speaker 2: Well, you know, I was mostly, I was doing the
• 11:32
  Speaker 2: road a little bit, but I was still making my
• 11:34
  Speaker 2: money in like, uh, you know, acting development deals. I
• 11:38
  Speaker 2: had a couple of development deals. um but i i
• 11:41
  Speaker 2: got that uh just you know like everybody else um
• 11:45
  Speaker 2: performing in the clubs and then they come you get
• 11:47
  Speaker 2: a showcase for them and then my premium blend did
• 11:50
  Speaker 2: really well that was the uh the blackie johnson bit
• 11:56
  Speaker 2: and then um then they gave me my half hour.
• 12:00
  Speaker 1: Off of that it was funny because i was talking
• 12:02
  Speaker 1: to a cat in uh detroit he just was like
• 12:05
  Speaker 1: he goes yeah he goes The Brent Ernst comedy special
• 12:07
  Speaker 1: was hilarious. He goes, my favorite joke. I don't know
• 12:09
  Speaker 1: which special was on there, but he was like, the
• 12:12
  Speaker 1: strawberry lemonade at the restaurant joke.
• 12:16
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that was my half hour.
• 12:18
  Speaker 1: That was the waiting people bit.
• 12:20
  Speaker 2: Which I still do, by the way. That's the only
• 12:22
  Speaker 2: bit I still do.
• 12:23
  Speaker 1: Because it's so good, it's still relevant. It still hits.
• 12:26
  Speaker 1: It's still funny, man.
• 12:27
  Speaker 2: It was more about waiting on people and waiting tables.
• 12:33
  Speaker 2: It scarred me for life, man, because I did it
• 12:35
  Speaker 2: for so long that I never get sick. That's the
• 12:38
  Speaker 2: only joke I'm not sick of.
• 12:41
  Speaker 1: Even the act out is fun. Even the act out
• 12:44
  Speaker 1: and everyone gets involved. Yeah, it's such a good joke. Okay,
• 12:46
  Speaker 1: so then Premium Blend.
• 12:49
  Speaker 1: Vince Vaughn that had been half hour special. And then
• 12:52
  Speaker 1: here come, like you said, development deals in TV, which
• 12:54
  Speaker 1: I wanted to get into too. Cause like, I mean,
• 12:56
  Speaker 1: you were on weeds, you're on, uh, I don't want
• 12:59
  Speaker 1: to get, I wouldn't, I don't want to skip ahead
• 13:01
  Speaker 1: too far, but the Cobra Kai.
• 13:02
  Speaker 2: Like, so what happened was really quick. I'm sorry.
• 13:05
  Speaker 1: So no, no, no, no. Go ahead.
• 13:07
  Speaker 2: In oh three, I got new faces in Montreal and
• 13:11
  Speaker 2: then I got a development deal out of that. And
• 13:14
  Speaker 2: then the next year I got another deal to develop
• 13:17
  Speaker 2: a show. And then I did Premium Blend. Then the
• 13:21
  Speaker 2: Wild West tour. Then the half hour. And in the meantime,
• 13:25
  Speaker 2: I did a couple late night shows. And I did
• 13:28
  Speaker 2: a thing with Russell Peters on Showtime. And then Weeds was, well,
• 13:35
  Speaker 2: the first acting gig I ever got was one line
• 13:37
  Speaker 2: on CSI New York.
• 13:39
  Speaker 1: Oh, shit. Oh, no, no.
• 13:40
  Speaker 2: Backtrack. I was on Young and the Restless. for like
• 13:44
  Speaker 2: three years as like a background guy and they threw
• 13:47
  Speaker 2: me a couple of lines every now and then.
• 13:50
  Speaker 1: You know what's funny is like, I've known you for
• 13:52
  Speaker 1: a while and like, you don't really talk, this is
• 13:54
  Speaker 1: the first time I get to ask questions about this
• 13:56
  Speaker 1: because I never really asked you anything like that. And
• 13:58
  Speaker 1: it's funny because like, you don't really talk about it
• 14:00
  Speaker 1: much too, especially in personal life. But there'll be sometimes
• 14:04
  Speaker 1: I'll be sitting back watching TV or watching a YouTube
• 14:06
  Speaker 1: or da, da, da, da. And I'm like, oh, fuck,
• 14:09
  Speaker 1: Ernst is on, what the hell? Like I see you
• 14:11
  Speaker 1: on a Kesha, was it Kesha video? Yeah.
• 14:13
  Speaker 2: Yeah yeah i don't.
• 14:15
  Speaker 1: Know where i was like wait what this guy doesn't
• 14:19
  Speaker 1: tell me anything i.
• 14:21
  Speaker 2: I don't i mean what's to tell.
• 14:24
  Speaker 1: It's just cool i don't know it's just cool like
• 14:26
  Speaker 1: like he's like oh yeah no like like i did
• 14:28
  Speaker 1: this to catch a video the other day or but
• 14:30
  Speaker 1: i was like as i'm watching it i'm like this
• 14:32
  Speaker 1: song is current like i've i i know him like
• 14:35
  Speaker 1: it's not like it's like something that you did years
• 14:37
  Speaker 1: and years ago and you just didn't tell me about
• 14:39
  Speaker 1: it like Like I talked to you almost every other
• 14:41
  Speaker 1: week and it's like, like none of it was like, yeah, no,
• 14:44
  Speaker 1: I shot a video with Kesha yesterday. And it's like,
• 14:45
  Speaker 1: it was none of that. It was like, I had
• 14:47
  Speaker 1: to discover it by accident because YouTube kicked me into a, uh,
• 14:51
  Speaker 1: the next music video. And I thought that was so
• 14:53
  Speaker 1: fucking funny.
• 14:54
  Speaker 2: Well, the director was a fan of comedy and he
• 14:57
  Speaker 2: was like, Hey man, you want to do this video?
• 14:59
  Speaker 2: Cause it's that blah, blah, blah. You know, the one
• 15:02
  Speaker 2: where she's like talking about guys.
• 15:04
  Speaker 1: The blah, blah, blah song. That's a, that's a, Nikki
• 15:06
  Speaker 1: knows that song. She's, she's, she's, she's nodding her head
• 15:08
  Speaker 1: right now. She's like, yeah, I know that song.
• 15:10
  Speaker 2: So in the beginning, um, they, uh, there's, they wanted
• 15:15
  Speaker 2: me to, you know, cause I, I do like a
• 15:17
  Speaker 2: character Guido version of me, which was kind of me
• 15:21
  Speaker 2: in my twenties, but not that bad. And, uh, and, uh, yeah,
• 15:26
  Speaker 2: he just said, Hey, can you be the guy at
• 15:27
  Speaker 2: the front door? You want to hear a side story
• 15:31
  Speaker 2: on that? Of course. So when you watch the video,
• 15:35
  Speaker 2: the guy that's checking the IDs, the guy that's working
• 15:37
  Speaker 2: the door, his name's Jody Millard. And he played at
• 15:43
  Speaker 2: Florida State. He was a defensive back. I think he
• 15:48
  Speaker 2: was safety. But anyways, I see him on the set.
• 15:52
  Speaker 2: Did I ever tell you this story?
• 15:54
  Speaker 1: No, nuh-uh.
• 16:01
  Speaker 2: So I grew up, I grew up in North Jersey,
• 16:04
  Speaker 2: moved to Florida, back to Jersey. I went to 15
• 16:07
  Speaker 2: different schools. I was always moving around as a kid.
• 16:10
  Speaker 2: And we lived in this apartment complex. It called the
• 16:12
  Speaker 2: fairways of Inverary.
• 16:14
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 16:14
  Speaker 2: And in Lauderhill and Florida. And I'm talking to the guy.
• 16:19
  Speaker 2: He's like, yeah, I'm from South Florida. I said, get
• 16:22
  Speaker 2: out of here, man. I did some growing up down there.
• 16:25
  Speaker 2: And I go, I lived in the fairways. Now, you know,
• 16:31
  Speaker 2: I told you that I was kind of a trouble kid.
• 16:35
  Speaker 2: I was always into trouble, man, you know. And I'm
• 16:38
  Speaker 2: 10 years old at this time, maybe 9, 10. Because
• 16:43
  Speaker 2: this was, I was born in Jersey, lived in Jersey,
• 16:46
  Speaker 2: moved to Florida, and then moved back to Jersey 6th, 7th,
• 16:50
  Speaker 2: 8th in the beginning of my 9th grade year, right?
• 16:52
  Speaker 1: Mm-hmm.
• 16:53
  Speaker 2: So, uh, this was before I moved back and, uh,
• 16:58
  Speaker 2: he was like, dude, I used to hang out at
• 17:00
  Speaker 2: the fairways and he was older than me. Now we,
• 17:04
  Speaker 2: you know, we, they were all apartment buildings and there was,
• 17:07
  Speaker 2: we had four buildings that were like eight stories high.
• 17:11
  Speaker 1: Yeah. And.
• 17:12
  Speaker 2: Back then, I'm a Gen Xer, so kids just lived outside, man.
• 17:18
  Speaker 2: You know what I mean? I'm not kidding. It would
• 17:20
  Speaker 2: be like 30 kids hanging out all the time on bikes.
• 17:23
  Speaker 2: You know how it was.
• 17:24
  Speaker 1: Yes. It's so funny that we'll play basketball in the
• 17:27
  Speaker 1: dark at night. We're always outside.
• 17:32
  Speaker 2: Yeah, always, bro. So he goes, yo, and we were
• 17:37
  Speaker 2: talking about it, and we knew the same kids, right?
• 17:39
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 17:40
  Speaker 2: Then he's like, yo, do you remember that one kid
• 17:43
  Speaker 2: that tried to shit off the eight story building? And
• 17:47
  Speaker 2: I'm like, yeah, that was me.
• 17:53
  Speaker 1: You're looking at him. I'm the guy.
• 17:56
  Speaker 2: He goes, oh, my God. He goes, I tell that
• 17:58
  Speaker 2: story all the time. So what happened was there was
• 18:02
  Speaker 2: a guy walking his dog.
• 18:03
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 18:04
  Speaker 2: And it was like there was like 20 of us
• 18:06
  Speaker 2: hanging out. So you know in the cartoons when you
• 18:09
  Speaker 2: drop something on somebody's head?
• 18:11
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 18:12
  Speaker 2: So we all were on that. We used to play
• 18:15
  Speaker 2: on the roof and shit, right?
• 18:16
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah.
• 18:17
  Speaker 2: So I said, yo, I'm going to shit on this guy, right? Dude,
• 18:22
  Speaker 2: there were kids. They were holding my hands. My ass
• 18:25
  Speaker 2: was off the balcony, and they're holding me, right?
• 18:29
  Speaker 1: You can see what he's doing. You know what I mean?
• 18:32
  Speaker 2: Like they all have my hands, and I'm scooted off
• 18:34
  Speaker 2: the balcony. And I scooted my ass off the ledge.
• 18:38
  Speaker 1: Off the ledge, yeah.
• 18:40
  Speaker 2: And the guy's standing there with his dog, and I
• 18:42
  Speaker 2: took a shit. But here's the thing. I was hoping
• 18:45
  Speaker 2: it would land on his head, and he'd be like, ah,
• 18:48
  Speaker 2: you know? Dude, it just fluttered away.
• 18:51
  Speaker 1: In the wind? In the wind.
• 18:55
  Speaker 2: And I was covered in shit, man. And everybody's going, run.
• 19:01
  Speaker 2: And I'm running. You know, nothing happened. Like, you didn't
• 19:06
  Speaker 2: even hit the guy. And I'm running, like, scooting, trying
• 19:09
  Speaker 2: to pull my pants up, and I was just covered
• 19:12
  Speaker 2: in shit.
• 19:13
  Speaker 1: We were all laughing. Just chock full of shit.
• 19:18
  Speaker 2: But he was the guy. He was like, yo, I
• 19:20
  Speaker 2: remember that. He goes, I tell people that story all
• 19:23
  Speaker 2: the time.
• 19:25
  Speaker 1: He's like, you're legendary, dude. You've lived in my head
• 19:27
  Speaker 1: for years, dude. And you're here in the flesh. He's like,
• 19:30
  Speaker 1: so then he's.
• 19:30
  Speaker 2: Like, so the other thing we did is we used
• 19:32
  Speaker 2: to like light, uh, tennis balls on fire and kick
• 19:35
  Speaker 2: them off the fucking roof.
• 19:37
  Speaker 1: Right. Yeah. So free funds.
• 19:41
  Speaker 2: So I set, I set a floor on fire. I
• 19:44
  Speaker 2: took a lighter fluid down the hallway and i lit
• 19:50
  Speaker 2: it and the fucking thing just went all the way
• 19:53
  Speaker 2: down all the way down the hallway and he's like
• 19:56
  Speaker 2: remember that kid that set that and i'm like.
• 19:58
  Speaker 1: It was me There's always that one kid that's like,
• 20:04
  Speaker 1: this guy is going to be an amazing individual or
• 20:07
  Speaker 1: a prisoner. A psychopath. Yeah.
• 20:11
  Speaker 2: Dude, one time we used to play in elevator shafts, right?
• 20:15
  Speaker 2: Like you open the elevator and then you get out
• 20:17
  Speaker 2: and crawl on top of it. And I found this
• 20:20
  Speaker 2: like plastic rope, but it was like a real rope.
• 20:23
  Speaker 2: But it was, I guess it might've been left over
• 20:25
  Speaker 2: from the elevator, you know, but it was long. So
• 20:29
  Speaker 2: what I did was I tied– because the doors in
• 20:32
  Speaker 2: the hallway, they were across from each other. They opened in.
• 20:35
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 20:36
  Speaker 2: I tied all the doors together, and then I pulled
• 20:40
  Speaker 2: the fire alarm, and nobody could get out.
• 20:43
  Speaker 1: Oh, shit. So you trapped everybody.
• 20:45
  Speaker 2: Oh, no. Yeah, but I mean there was no real fire,
• 20:47
  Speaker 2: but they– Yeah.
• 20:48
  Speaker 1: No, no, this flips them out. Dude, it's so funny
• 20:50
  Speaker 1: that we have kind of like a similar story. Maybe
• 20:52
  Speaker 1: that's why we're friends.
• 20:54
  Speaker 2: By the way, that's a felony.
• 20:56
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's a– I know too because– I didn't know that.
• 20:58
  Speaker 1: I was, okay, in, I live from Sacramento. There was
• 21:04
  Speaker 1: a place called, like, it's down the way, I think
• 21:05
  Speaker 1: it was in Vacaville. It was called The Woos, and
• 21:07
  Speaker 1: basically it was this, like, theme park of mazes. That's
• 21:10
  Speaker 1: all it was, just a whole bunch of different types
• 21:11
  Speaker 1: of mazes. And this kid had a birthday party there.
• 21:15
  Speaker 1: It was in, I think, about second grade. And I
• 21:18
  Speaker 1: seen a fire alarm, and I was kind of like, yo,
• 21:20
  Speaker 1: you know. I was always that kid, like, hey, dare
• 21:21
  Speaker 1: me to do it. But it was just me telling
• 21:24
  Speaker 1: you to dare me to do it because I wanted
• 21:25
  Speaker 1: to do it. And I went and pulled the fire
• 21:27
  Speaker 1: alarm and everybody is coming out, you know, and all
• 21:30
  Speaker 1: these people are trapped inside the mazes and shit. And
• 21:33
  Speaker 1: they were like the ambulance came, the fire department came.
• 21:35
  Speaker 1: And then like some old people got hurt because they're
• 21:37
  Speaker 1: getting trampled on. And they were like, you're in you're
• 21:40
  Speaker 1: in serious trouble. That's a felony. And my mom was like,
• 21:42
  Speaker 1: they're like, they're going to find my mom. And then
• 21:44
  Speaker 1: they were like, I never I didn't go to a
• 21:46
  Speaker 1: birthday party until I didn't go to a party until
• 21:48
  Speaker 1: maybe high school because I was that kid. I was like,
• 21:50
  Speaker 1: don't invite him. He's going to he's going to ruin.
• 21:52
  Speaker 1: He's going to fuck shit up. But, you know, I
• 21:53
  Speaker 1: found that out the hard way, too. That pulling the
• 21:55
  Speaker 1: fire alarm is a fucking felony.
• 21:58
  Speaker 2: I think it's the ADHD, man, or something.
• 22:01
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's just like a curiosity. Like, well, I just
• 22:04
  Speaker 1: want to do something. I just want to do it.
• 22:05
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it's exciting.
• 22:07
  Speaker 1: All right, so Nikki's busting them over here. Nikki's got questions.
• 22:12
  Speaker 1: She's got for the trivia and stuff like that. So
• 22:14
  Speaker 1: I'm going to give her the headphones so she can hear, too.
• 22:16
  Speaker 1: Are you good like that?
• 22:17
  Speaker 2: I only got one set of headphones.
• 22:19
  Speaker 1: Yeah, man. Oh, yeah. I, there's like, we're in a, we're,
• 22:23
  Speaker 1: we're doing a portable studio. So it's like, I just
• 22:26
  Speaker 1: needed to bring that next time. Can you hear us? Okay.
• 22:29
  Speaker 3: I can hear you. I can't hear Brett, but I'll
• 22:31
  Speaker 3: just try to read lips. You just let me know
• 22:33
  Speaker 3: if he gets it right.
• 22:34
  Speaker 1: Okay. I'll let you know if he gets it right.
• 22:39
  Speaker 1: No lie. Hey, Ernst is mad competitive too.
• 22:41
  Speaker 3: I'm going to start you guys with a softball question here.
• 22:43
  Speaker 1: Softball question. Okay. Yeah.
• 22:44
  Speaker 3: What color pill does Neo take in the matrix?
• 22:47
  Speaker 1: Oh, okay. It's a red pill, right? Boom. He got it.
• 22:51
  Speaker 1: Red pill. Nice. Softball. Okay. He said, what's up, Nick, too,
• 22:55
  Speaker 1: by the way. Oh, what's up?
• 22:58
  Speaker 3: Which famous acoustic artist tragically died in a plane crash.
• 23:03
  Speaker 2: While- Jim Croce. Jim Croce. Jim Croce.
• 23:07
  Speaker 1: Do you hear him? No. He said Jim Croce.
• 23:09
  Speaker 3: Are you sticking with that answer?
• 23:10
  Speaker 1: Are you sticking with that, she said.
• 23:12
  Speaker 2: I mean, he was an acoustic guitar player and he
• 23:14
  Speaker 2: died in a plane crash.
• 23:16
  Speaker 3: You want to give it a go there, Charles?
• 23:17
  Speaker 1: I'm going to say Buddy Holly.
• 23:19
  Speaker 3: Neither of you are correct. It's John Denver.
• 23:21
  Speaker 2: Neither.
• 23:21
  Speaker 1: Oh, John Denver. Oh, okay.
• 23:22
  Speaker 2: Yeah, well, there's been.
• 23:25
  Speaker 1: There's been so many that died on there.
• 23:27
  Speaker 2: Maybe I should have let you finish the question.
• 23:30
  Speaker 1: I know. He said, maybe I should have let you
• 23:31
  Speaker 1: finish the question. He jumped in.
• 23:32
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I was going to say, it's in 1997. That
• 23:35
  Speaker 3: might have helped you a little.
• 23:36
  Speaker 1: Bit, but.
• 23:36
  Speaker 2: Yeah, no, that would have. All right.
• 23:39
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah. Go ahead.
• 23:41
  Speaker 3: All right, cool. So, which actor has received the most
• 23:44
  Speaker 3: Academy Award nominations?
• 23:46
  Speaker 1: Ooh, that's a good question. Uh....
• 23:53
  Speaker 2: Robert De Niro?
• 23:54
  Speaker 1: He's saying Robert De Niro.
• 23:56
  Speaker 3: What are you going to say, Carlos?
• 23:57
  Speaker 1: Most Academy Award nomination. Anthony Hopkins?
• 24:09
  Speaker 3: You guys got to get with the times. You guys
• 24:10
  Speaker 3: think it's a man.
• 24:11
  Speaker 1: It's a woman. Oh, it's a woman.
• 24:13
  Speaker 2: Let me get one more. Let me get one more guess.
• 24:15
  Speaker 1: He said one more guess for the actress. You said actress. Actor?
• 24:19
  Speaker 1: You can say actor. Oh, no.
• 24:22
  Speaker 2: Say actor or actress.
• 24:23
  Speaker 3: That social construct, I guess.
• 24:25
  Speaker 1: Look, she's over here trying to be all, trying to listen.
• 24:29
  Speaker 1: Who's the most left-handed award-winning fucking Z, identifies as a
• 24:37
  Speaker 1: Z actor?
• 24:40
  Speaker 2: I'll go Meryl Streep.
• 24:42
  Speaker 1: Meryl Streep. That's a great one. Fuck, I want to
• 24:44
  Speaker 1: go with that, too.
• 24:46
  Speaker 3: All right, you're both right.
• 24:47
  Speaker 1: Oh, boom, there we go. Nice.
• 24:48
  Speaker 3: All right, cool, cool, cool, cool.
• 24:50
  Speaker 1: Nice.
• 24:51
  Speaker 2: Wait, you can't echo my sentiment.
• 24:55
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yes, I can. I'm just copying and pasting all
• 24:58
  Speaker 1: your shit.
• 25:00
  Speaker 3: What was the gateway arch in St. Louis built to represent?
• 25:06
  Speaker 2: Oh, I know.
• 25:08
  Speaker 1: What is it? I don't know this one.
• 25:10
  Speaker 2: Uh, Carlos's mom's vagina.
• 25:16
  Speaker 1: Her regime. Um, what is, uh, the, uh, the St.
• 25:22
  Speaker 1: Louis archway is supposed to represent, um, Oh.
• 25:26
  Speaker 2: It's something in Rome, isn't it? Like, or the Parthenon
• 25:30
  Speaker 2: or something like that.
• 25:31
  Speaker 1: He said it's, uh, something to Rome, the Parthenon. I'm,
• 25:33
  Speaker 1: I'm thinking it's, uh, space. No, the space needle is Seattle. Um,
• 25:40
  Speaker 1: I don't know. I don't know this one at all.
• 25:41
  Speaker 1: All right. It is.
• 25:44
  Speaker 3: It's supposed to show the city's role as the gateway
• 25:46
  Speaker 3: to the West to bring westward expansion.
• 25:49
  Speaker 1: Oh, you hear that?
• 25:50
  Speaker 2: Ain't nobody getting that.
• 25:52
  Speaker 1: Ain't nobody here for that bullshit.
• 25:56
  Speaker 2: This is.
• 26:00
  Speaker 1: Great.
• 26:01
  Speaker 3: I can talk trash to Brett, but I can't hear it,
• 26:02
  Speaker 3: so it's like.
• 26:04
  Speaker 1: So you can get a word in.
• 26:07
  Speaker 3: Believe it or not, Jimi Hendrix... Only had one top
• 26:12
  Speaker 3: 40 hit. What song was it?
• 26:14
  Speaker 1: Oh, shit. I want to say.
• 26:16
  Speaker 2: No, no. The Watchtower.
• 26:18
  Speaker 1: I was going to say The Watchtower, too. That's a cover, too. Yeah.
• 26:24
  Speaker 1: You know what? I'll go different. I'll say Foxy Lady. Okay.
• 26:27
  Speaker 3: Well, Brett gets that point.
• 26:28
  Speaker 1: Boom. There you go. Nice. Nice. All right. Ready for
• 26:34
  Speaker 1: the next one? All right.
• 26:35
  Speaker 3: Which color appears on more national flags than any other color?
• 26:39
  Speaker 1: I'm going to say red.
• 26:43
  Speaker 2: I'm going to say white.
• 26:46
  Speaker 1: He said white.
• 26:48
  Speaker 3: It's actually red.
• 26:48
  Speaker 1: It's red. Boom. There it is. Cheers.
• 26:52
  Speaker 2: I should have just said red.
• 26:53
  Speaker 1: All right.
• 26:57
  Speaker 3: How many islands make up Hawaii?
• 27:01
  Speaker 1: Oh, five.
• 27:03
  Speaker 2: I'll go seven.
• 27:06
  Speaker 1: It's eight.
• 27:07
  Speaker 2: Eight.
• 27:07
  Speaker 3: You guys were so close.
• 27:08
  Speaker 1: That's right, because they always say Las Vegas is the
• 27:10
  Speaker 1: ninth island because they all come over here. Dude, in Vegas,
• 27:14
  Speaker 1: it's crazy. There's like direct flights to Kauai and all
• 27:18
  Speaker 1: that shit. Yeah, yeah. There's a big community. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So, yeah.
• 27:24
  Speaker 2: All right.
• 27:24
  Speaker 3: What nut is famously used in the creation of traditional
• 27:28
  Speaker 3: dynamite due to its nitroglycerin content?
• 27:31
  Speaker 2: Walnuts.
• 27:32
  Speaker 1: Walnuts, you said? I don't know. But that sounded like
• 27:38
  Speaker 1: a loaded– that sounded like a lot of puns, a
• 27:41
  Speaker 1: lot of innuendo.
• 27:43
  Speaker 3: It's actually peanuts.
• 27:44
  Speaker 1: Peanuts.
• 27:45
  Speaker 2: Oh, really? Oh, wow.
• 27:47
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 27:49
  Speaker 2: Okay.
• 27:50
  Speaker 1: All right.
• 27:52
  Speaker 3: We're going to go with a music question.
• 27:53
  Speaker 1: How about that?
• 27:55
  Speaker 3: What singer is known as the vocal Bible?
• 27:59
  Speaker 1: The singer that's known as the vocal Bible?
• 28:02
  Speaker 3: Yeah, a singer.
• 28:03
  Speaker 2: Whitney Houston.
• 28:06
  Speaker 1: Whitney Houston.
• 28:08
  Speaker 3: That's actually a really good guess. What do you think, Brett?
• 28:14
  Speaker 2: Aretha Franklin.
• 28:15
  Speaker 1: Ooh, that's a good answer.
• 28:17
  Speaker 2: Because it's got to be gospel, right?
• 28:19
  Speaker 1: Yeah, he said Aretha Franklin.
• 28:21
  Speaker 3: Oh, that's also good. I'm going to give you guys
• 28:23
  Speaker 3: a second guess. Neither one of those are correct. She's
• 28:25
  Speaker 3: more popular in the early 90s.
• 28:28
  Speaker 1: Dolly Parton.
• 28:29
  Speaker 2: Celine Dion.
• 28:30
  Speaker 1: He said Celine Dion.
• 28:32
  Speaker 3: It's Brandy.
• 28:33
  Speaker 1: It's Brandy. Brandy? I know. That's okay.
• 28:36
  Speaker 3: No shade to Brandy.
• 28:37
  Speaker 1: I'm just saying, like, No, definitely Shade of Brandy. We
• 28:41
  Speaker 1: just named amazing singers and then you're talking about Brandy.
• 28:44
  Speaker 2: I was thinking of singers that were in the church
• 28:48
  Speaker 2: or did gospel music. I didn't know Brandy did that.
• 28:51
  Speaker 1: Me neither. All right.
• 28:54
  Speaker 3: Okay, so this is your last question.
• 28:56
  Speaker 1: Last question.
• 28:57
  Speaker 3: You can wager all your points.
• 28:58
  Speaker 1: Wager all three if you'd like.
• 29:00
  Speaker 2: You got two.
• 29:02
  Speaker 1: I'm relaying. It's an Ernst, because I have to relay
• 29:05
  Speaker 1: to you, Ernst to you, so it's like there's no need.
• 29:07
  Speaker 1: He can fucking hear you. It's going to.
• 29:10
  Speaker 3: Be a historical question.
• 29:11
  Speaker 2: I can hear you.
• 29:11
  Speaker 1: Just so you know. Okay, history. I'll wager my two.
• 29:16
  Speaker 1: I'll wager all mine.
• 29:18
  Speaker 2: What are you waging, Brett? I'll wager three, as long as, yeah.
• 29:21
  Speaker 1: Go ahead. I'm going out.
• 29:23
  Speaker 3: All right, here we go. What was the first U.S.
• 29:26
  Speaker 3: national monument ever built?
• 29:29
  Speaker 1: Whatever Ernst says, and if it's right, I'll take that.
• 29:34
  Speaker 1: The first national monument, I want to say, I'm going
• 29:36
  Speaker 1: to say the Washington Monument.
• 29:42
  Speaker 2: I'm going to go with the White House.
• 29:44
  Speaker 1: Oh, that's a good one. He said the White House.
• 29:47
  Speaker 3: Oh, that's good.
• 29:48
  Speaker 1: Yeah. What was it?
• 29:49
  Speaker 3: The actual answer is the Devil's Tower in Wyoming.
• 29:52
  Speaker 1: What the fuck? I know.
• 29:54
  Speaker 3: It was designated in 1906.
• 29:56
  Speaker 2: All right, we need one more to... I can tell
• 30:00
  Speaker 2: he's mad.
• 30:00
  Speaker 1: I told you he's competitive. But you won, Brett, you won.
• 30:04
  Speaker 1: You won.
• 30:04
  Speaker 3: So congratulations.
• 30:05
  Speaker 1: Well, we both got zero because we both got it wrong.
• 30:08
  Speaker 2: Here's my question, though. This was because Wyoming wasn't even
• 30:14
  Speaker 2: one of the original 13. We didn't have a monument
• 30:17
  Speaker 2: when we had the colonies?
• 30:20
  Speaker 1: I don't know. Maybe they didn't start making monuments. It
• 30:24
  Speaker 1: probably was something like that. but they didn't like officially
• 30:27
  Speaker 1: name this one a monument. Like, all right, now we're here.
• 30:29
  Speaker 1: Look at it. Here he goes with the Google. Yeah, yeah.
• 30:31
  Speaker 1: Look at him.
• 30:32
  Speaker 3: It's the first U.S. national monument.
• 30:35
  Speaker 2: Okay, I'm going to look it up.
• 30:38
  Speaker 1: It's so confusing. I told you.
• 30:42
  Speaker 3: It came from the internet, so you know it's true.
• 30:49
  Speaker 2: No, it doesn't say it.
• 30:51
  Speaker 1: All right, okay. Good job, guys.
• 30:56
  Speaker 2: On September 24th, 1906 was the first monument. 1906. And
• 31:01
  Speaker 2: it was Carlos's mom's... Her triple beam scale.
• 31:08
  Speaker 1: Her triple beam scale, yeah. Her fucking... Her how to
• 31:11
  Speaker 1: get money movement was after the suffrage. All right. Hey,
• 31:18
  Speaker 1: tell them where they can find you at.
• 31:20
  Speaker 2: Her Glock 9mm. Well, they didn't have Glocks back then,
• 31:25
  Speaker 2: I don't think.
• 31:28
  Speaker 1: So tell them where they can see you at and
• 31:30
  Speaker 1: tell them where they can find you at.
• 31:32
  Speaker 2: Just go to brettcomedy.com. B-R-E-T. Brett with one T. Comedy.com.
• 31:39
  Speaker 2: And I'll be at the mic drop July 2nd and 3rd,
• 31:42
  Speaker 2: I think. Is that correct?
• 31:44
  Speaker 1: Yes.
• 31:46
  Speaker 2: July 2nd and 3rd. The mic drops San Diego. And
• 31:50
  Speaker 2: I hope to see everybody there.
• 31:51
  Speaker 1: Right on.