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Unlocking Energetic Choices: A Journey Towards Intentional Living and Personal Transformation · STOPTIME: Live in the Moment.

• 0:23
  Speaker 1: Hey there, we're going to get into it today, so get out your journal and your favorite writing utensil.
• 0:29
  Speaker 1: I'm hoping today's sash will shed some light on how you're showing up energetically and help you to understand how your default choices are limiting you, and by default I mean operating or showing up in the same way when you're approaching a situation.
• 0:47
  Speaker 1: When you do this, the outcome is always the same.
• 0:51
  Speaker 1: I call it your default choice, and that's okay if you want to live a default future.
• 0:57
  Speaker 1: So today I'm going to offer you a tool that will unlock an unlimited supply of energetic choice.
• 1:05
  Speaker 1: Let's go Okay.
• 1:10
  Speaker 1: So we're all made up of energy, and how we use our energy determines how we show up in the world, and how we show up in the world determines how we experience and engage in our lives.
• 1:22
  Speaker 1: And guess what?
• 1:24
  Speaker 1: How we experience and engage in our lives is entirely up to us.
• 1:30
  Speaker 1: That's what I call energetic choice.
• 1:34
  Speaker 1: I'm sure that when we got up this morning, we all had preconceived notions about what today might look like.
• 1:44
  Speaker 1: Well, I know I did, but there's this opportunity to lead our lives more consciously than that.
• 1:51
  Speaker 1: Our days don't have to be directed by those notions or beliefs about how things are supposed to be.
• 1:58
  Speaker 1: It doesn't have to be about running the gauntlet or simply managing or getting by or getting through each day, every moment of our day.
• 2:09
  Speaker 1: Each moment of our day or week or lives can be about so much more if we just open our minds.
• 2:16
  Speaker 1: Open our minds to the floodgate of possibilities available to us when we understand and tap into our capacity for energetic choice.
• 2:33
  Speaker 1: People often ask me what I do as a coach.
• 2:35
  Speaker 1: And I tell them I listen and ask questions.
• 2:38
  Speaker 1: And they ask well, how does that help?
• 2:41
  Speaker 1: How do you help them?
• 2:42
  Speaker 1: And I tell them I listen beyond what they are saying to me and deeper into what they are telling themselves.
• 2:49
  Speaker 1: That's where the transformation begins and it doesn't matter what you do.
• 2:56
  Speaker 1: Our problems aren't that different.
• 2:58
  Speaker 1: Although our contexts differ, the bottom line is it no matter what a person does whenever they feel stuck, unfulfilled or out of alignment, it's because.
• 3:09
  Speaker 1: It's because they need to take a closer look at what energetic choices they have available to them.
• 3:16
  Speaker 1: Your range of energetic choice increases when you recognize your default responses to people, situations and emotions.
• 3:28
  Speaker 1: We're going to get into those five energetic choices, but first I want you to consider these scenarios.
• 3:35
  Speaker 1: I'm curious to see if you recognize yourself in any of these situations.
• 3:40
  Speaker 1: I know I've experienced all of them myself, so let me explain.
• 3:44
  Speaker 1: The first scenario goes something like this Maybe there's something you say you really want to do, but when the time comes to it you just don't do it.
• 3:54
  Speaker 1: Maybe it's you're stoked to get in shape, or there's a new idea you want to bring to life.
• 4:00
  Speaker 1: Maybe there's a new course or book you want to read, a conversation that you want to have, but whatever it is, somewhere along the way the inspiration has dissipated.
• 4:10
  Speaker 1: You hit this news, you put it on the back burner, or you leave the book on the shelf and, even though you really wanted to do it, you don't Take a few moments and journal a bit about where you see yourself in that situation.
• 4:26
  Speaker 1: So the second scenario looks something like this You're so bogged down by the day-to-day obligations and expectations in your life that you barely have any time to think about what you want to do, let alone do it.
• 4:48
  Speaker 1: Maybe you've tried every planner and calendar app to be more efficient, to give yourself more time to do the thing you really want to do, but no matter how hard you try, you just can't seem to catch up on all that stuff that gets in the way and you feel like you're saying no to a lot of things that bring you joy because you just don't have the time and you resent the things that take you away from what it is you really want to be doing and you're just not sure what to do about it.
• 5:16
  Speaker 1: Take a moment to reflect on where in your life you feel this way.
• 5:22
  Speaker 1: Here's the third scenario.
• 5:29
  Speaker 1: Maybe there's something you've been doing for quite a while now and you're really good at it.
• 5:35
  Speaker 1: Or maybe you're even passionate about it and you've been doing it for a long time, but, for whatever reason, you're noticing that you just don't feel as jazzed about it as you used to and you're not really sure if you should keep on doing it or if it's maybe time to be doing something else.
• 5:54
  Speaker 1: Take a moment to see if there's anywhere in your life or anything you've been doing where this comes up for you.
• 6:02
  Speaker 1: So, again, as you reflect on these three scenarios, the first one was there's something you really wanted to do but you didn't.
• 6:13
  Speaker 1: The second scenario is that you feel resentful of the things that take you away from what you know you want to do, or, three, that you've been doing something for a long time.
• 6:24
  Speaker 1: It could be a job, it could be a relationship, it could be whatever you imagine, but for whatever reason, you're just not feeling it the same way you did before.
• 6:33
  Speaker 1: So these are just three common scenarios, but I wanted you to reflect on those because this will help you see how understanding your energetic choices comes in really handy.
• 6:49
  Speaker 1: So the first energetic choice is what I call I can't.
• 6:58
  Speaker 1: So when you're operating from, I can't.
• 7:06
  Speaker 1: Let's look at the first scenario.
• 7:07
  Speaker 1: Maybe you see something cool that you'd like to do, remember, like reading that new book or trying that new course, or maybe working out.
• 7:16
  Speaker 1: But when it comes time to do it, if you're operating from I can't, all the reasons come in, like I can't because I'm too tired, I can't because I'm not smart enough, I can't because I'm not connected enough, not brave enough, I'll never have the time.
• 7:32
  Speaker 1: Do you see how I can't hold you back?
• 7:37
  Speaker 1: Now, in the second scenario, remember the one where you get frustrated that things are taking away from what you say you want to do.
• 7:45
  Speaker 1: Well, I can't works here in this way.
• 7:49
  Speaker 1: It says I can't because there's too much to do today.
• 7:52
  Speaker 1: You're just sitting in resentment.
• 7:53
  Speaker 1: I can't because I never get a chance to do things like that.
• 7:57
  Speaker 1: I can't because I have such a demanding life.
• 8:00
  Speaker 1: I can't because dot, dot, dot, dot dot.
• 8:02
  Speaker 1: Or in the third scenario.
• 8:06
  Speaker 1: And the third scenario was when you've been doing something for a while, remember, and you used to really like it, but it's not lighting you up as much as it did before.
• 8:14
  Speaker 1: When you're operating from I can't in the third scenario, you say things to yourself like I can't do anything else.
• 8:22
  Speaker 1: You doubt your abilities, I can't quit, even though it doesn't light me up anymore.
• 8:28
  Speaker 1: I can't leave.
• 8:29
  Speaker 1: It leaves you with no choice.
• 8:33
  Speaker 1: When you operate from I can't, the perception is that something is impossible or that you might fail, or that continuing is futile, and so you stay in your lane, aka your rut, because you tell yourself I can't do anything else.
• 8:53
  Speaker 1: Where in your life are you not seeing possibilities?
• 8:58
  Speaker 1: Because you're telling yourself I can't?
• 9:01
  Speaker 1: Take a moment, reflect on that in your journal.
• 9:08
  Speaker 1: The next energetic choice is what I call I have to, and it's motivated by need and fear.
• 9:17
  Speaker 1: We hear it all the time.
• 9:21
  Speaker 1: I really want to go out tonight, but I have to do this instead.
• 9:26
  Speaker 1: I really have to be better at my job or I'm going to get fired.
• 9:29
  Speaker 1: I have to take this call, answer this email, go to more auditions, get myself out there, be on social media.
• 9:38
  Speaker 1: I have to get in shape.
• 9:39
  Speaker 1: I have to do the dishes.
• 9:40
  Speaker 1: Walk the dog, call my parents, I have to.
• 9:45
  Speaker 1: Can catalyze a certain amount of energy towards a goal, but it's an unsustainable energetic choice that can deplete your energy and engagement when you need it the most, because it requires force, and force burns up a lot of energy.
• 10:02
  Speaker 1: It also carries a lot of resentment.
• 10:05
  Speaker 1: You know you're at, I have to when you feel like everything feels like effort, which is why, in scenario one, even though it might get you to start the book or go to the gym once or twice, it won't create a sustainable long-term habit because it's fueled by force and fear.
• 10:24
  Speaker 1: If then black and white thinking.
• 10:26
  Speaker 1: So ask yourself how does I have to show up in your inner dialogue?
• 10:32
  Speaker 1: How often do you find yourselves defaulting to saying that when someone says, hey, you want to go for coffee, oh, I can't, I have to Right.
• 10:42
  Speaker 1: Or maybe you've encountered folks in your orbit who have operated in this way.
• 10:47
  Speaker 1: How motivated would you be to continue working with them?
• 10:52
  Speaker 1: The fun fact is that it's the predominant energy, not only in the workplace, but in life in general.
• 11:03
  Speaker 1: Take a moment and reflect on where in your life I have to is the energetic choice that you are making.
• 11:12
  Speaker 1: Keep in mind, as you're reflecting, that this is drawing awareness around your defaults and that is the beginning of transformation.
• 11:23
  Speaker 1: Once you draw awareness to how you're showing up, then you can choose to change things.
• 11:30
  Speaker 1: Okay, so the next energetic choice is what I call I should, which is what I like to think of as I could, but with shame.
• 11:44
  Speaker 1: You know there's real potential here.
• 11:47
  Speaker 1: There's real potential to access higher levels of energetic choice if we can lose that shame and shift into I could.
• 11:56
  Speaker 1: But as long as it's fueled by shaming you into doing things, I should will drag you back into the lower, fear based energetic choices.
• 12:06
  Speaker 1: Let's be honest how many times, how many times today or lately, have you said to yourself I should.
• 12:15
  Speaker 1: I should go to the gym because I'm wasting my money and I bought a membership.
• 12:20
  Speaker 1: I should go to the gym because I don't look good.
• 12:22
  Speaker 1: I should go to the event because everyone's going.
• 12:24
  Speaker 1: I should read more because I don't know enough.
• 12:28
  Speaker 1: But when we lose the shame and lean into I could, then we start to connect with our own capabilities and become more solution focused and the possibilities begin to widen and flow.
• 12:47
  Speaker 1: I should go to the gym becomes.
• 12:51
  Speaker 1: I could go to the gym on my way back from the event.
• 12:55
  Speaker 1: I could watch one last episode of my favorite show and use that time to read.
• 13:02
  Speaker 1: You see, when you lose the shame, you start getting ideas because you know you can.
• 13:12
  Speaker 1: The next energetic choice is called I want to.
• 13:16
  Speaker 1: Now to be clear.
• 13:18
  Speaker 1: Want is very different from need.
• 13:20
  Speaker 1: Needs are things you require to survive, whereas wants are things you could survive without but would rather not.
• 13:28
  Speaker 1: I want to is deeply connected to your why you become more naturally motivated, because you can see why it is you want to do something.
• 13:40
  Speaker 1: You're connected to your values.
• 13:41
  Speaker 1: There's a deeper meaning behind whatever it is you're doing.
• 13:46
  Speaker 1: So I want to read becomes.
• 13:50
  Speaker 1: I want to read because learning is important to me.
• 13:53
  Speaker 1: I want to complete this becomes.
• 13:57
  Speaker 1: I want to complete this because I like to do what I say I'm going to do.
• 14:02
  Speaker 1: It feels great.
• 14:03
  Speaker 1: I want to because it's good for me and it's good for you and maybe it'll be good for everybody.
• 14:10
  Speaker 1: That's why I want to do it.
• 14:11
  Speaker 1: Do you see how it grows and perpetuates more commitment to whatever it is.
• 14:16
  Speaker 1: It's a powerful, powerful choice, and when you go from I can't to I have to to I should, to no, no, I could.
• 14:32
  Speaker 1: And not only could I, but I want to.
• 14:34
  Speaker 1: Wow, we're really moving up on the scale of energetic choice.
• 14:39
  Speaker 1: So take a moment to think about why you do what you do and why it's important to you to do it, whether it be your taxes or following your dream.
• 14:53
  Speaker 1: Reconnect to the energetic choice of.
• 14:56
  Speaker 1: I want to take a moment to reflect on where, where in your life, you can shift into this energetic choice.
• 15:05
  Speaker 1: So the final and ultimate energetic choice on the choice capacitor is what I call I get to its choice with gratitude.
• 15:22
  Speaker 1: Even the most mundane or difficult situations are easier because you have overcome your default reactions and enabled your creative, limitless access to choice.
• 15:35
  Speaker 1: Not only are you doing it, but you are grateful for the opportunity to do it, whether it's something extraordinary that you never imagined doing, or ordinary washing the dishes or doing taxes.
• 15:50
  Speaker 1: When you are operating from I get to, you appreciate all things, great and small, and understand that by approaching the less attractive items on your list with I get to, you'll be more efficient, more energetically engaged and able to do them and still have energy to create other things in your life that you want, and that you get to take a moment and write a few phrases in your journal about things that perhaps you've transformed during this discussion from I can't or I have to, or I should or I want to to I get to.
• 16:35
  Speaker 1: I'm pretty confident that if you draw awareness around these, that you're going to find some opportunities to make that shift and create some more space and energy to increase your capacity for energetic choice.
• 16:56
  Speaker 1: I call my model the choice capacitor and it looks kind of like a dial on your car.
• 17:02
  Speaker 1: You know where the gas tank is empty on the left and where it's full on the right and right at the bottom.
• 17:08
  Speaker 1: On the left is that I can't position and all the way on the other side is I get to.
• 17:15
  Speaker 1: And what the choice capacitor measures is the level of your energetic choice and how your energetic choices are affecting your life.
• 17:23
  Speaker 1: On the left side of the choice capacitor is driven by fear, by fear based energetic choices, and as you move right, your choices become more value driven and connected to your sense of purpose.
• 17:41
  Speaker 1: I have this model and I can share it with you, so please do reach out if you'd like a visual.
• 17:47
  Speaker 1: In the meantime, I'm confident that, through your reflections and your notes, that you will be able to access these energetic choices, draw awareness around them and use them consciously.
• 18:03
  Speaker 1: Every choice that I have made in each and every moment of my life up until now has led me here to this moment, speaking to you right now, right here and as I sign off today, I stand here in choice with gratitude because I get to share this with you.
• 18:27
  Speaker 1: I'm Lisa Hopkins.
• 18:31
  Speaker 1: Thanks so much for listening.
• 18:33
  Speaker 1: Stay safe and healthy, everyone, and remember to live in the moment.