Latest / Good Morning From The Chicken Coop! / Season 3 - Episode 151 - Why are emotions all over the place?

Transcript

Season 3 - Episode 151 - Why are emotions all over the place? · Good Morning From The Chicken Coop!

• 0:01
  Welcome to the Good Morning from the Chicken Coop podcast with
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  Kim Johnson, your creative strategist and mastermind set
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  coach. Filled with inspiration,
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  distinctions, perspectives, and possibilities, we help you to
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  cultivate a mindset that leads you to create the best version
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  of yourself you could ever imagine.
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  Join Kim every morning from one of her favorite happy places,
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  her chicken coop, along with all her chickens.
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  Hey everybody, good morning from inside the chicken coop.
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  Just doing a little head check, making sure everybody's good
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  before they go off for their day.
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  And apparently our girl Wanda wants to say hello to everybody
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  because she's got a lot to say going on.
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  So today we're going to talk about why do most of us believe
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  we fail at managing our emotions.
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  So first of all, emotions are like herding cats.
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  I want to be very clear about this.
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  Emotions are like herding cats. They are all over the place and
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  you've heard me say this before on other podcast, but you know,
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  it's projected that we have between 60 to 80 thousand
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  thoughts a day. Some people project up to
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  100,000 thoughts per day. And of those 100,000 thoughts or
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  up to 100,000 thoughts, we have 2/3 of them repeated from the
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  day before. It's no accident that they're
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  hard to manage. There's a lot going on.
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  Not to mention that everybody in the world is buying for your
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  attention, trying to get you to buy this.
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  Pay attention to this. Look at me, influencers are
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  everywhere. Everybody's asking for your
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  family. Everybody's trying to capture a
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  moment of your time to get your attention.
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  And you know, here we are trying to manage ourselves and trying
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  to stay calm with all of our buttons, with all of our
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  beliefs, with all the things that we have adopted from other
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  people. We all have these issues and
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  Lord knows that it's completely complex to be able to manage
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  yourself in all of this chaos, which is why it's so important
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  to to one pause. You know, if any of you have
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  read my book, who's Driving Your bus?
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  That there is a very distinct line in there where we say you
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  have to stop, reflect, choose, redirect.
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  So when that stop comes up, you have to ask yourself, are you
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  reflecting? Where am I right now?
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  Where am I? What am I giving my attention
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  to? What is the buttons that's being
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  pushed? What is the emotion I'm in?
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  Because if you can't figure out where you currently are, it's
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  impossible to figure out where you want to go next.
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  So it's just like being in the car and being lost.
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  If I called one of you and I said, hey, listen, I'm trying to
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  get to your house and I'm lost, you'd say, well, where are you?
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  And if I said to you, I don't know, you'd say, well, I can't
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  help you unless I know where you are.
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  And so just like in a coaching session, when someone calls and
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  they say to me, I'm so upset I have this going on or this going
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  on. I the very first thing that I
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  always say to them is, OK, what's the main thought going on
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  in your head? What's the main focus going on
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  in your head? And if I can nail down what that
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  main focus is that I can help them figure their way out of it.
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  So today I want to give you guys this the same pattern because
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  nothing is more important than that.
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  Stop and reflect and then choosing and redirecting.
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  Yes, but the first part of it is so critical.
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  Stop, just stop yourself from, from the, the constant chatter
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  of saying, Oh, Oh my God, I'm all over the place because we, I
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  can't tell you how many times I hear people say that I'm all
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  over the place. And I know there are times when
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  I get really excited about things.
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  Perfect example, the other day I was in the garden center and I
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  had this, I would call it an experience with this girl that
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  worked there because she was helping me with a problem.
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  And she said something that I had I heard, hadn't heard that I
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  could have certain plants that I had never been able thought I
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  was able to have here in the heat.
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  And she said, no, as long as you do them like this and this and
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  this, you can have them. And I was from that moment
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  forward, my head was spinning because all these ideas were
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  running. And I was excited and I was
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  anxious that I wanted to get the ones that were on the floor
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  before someone else got them. There was so many different
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  things happening in my head all at once.
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  And I had to legitimately could not get control of it.
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  So I'm telling you, even when we think we know all this stuff,
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  we're still going to have these things happen.
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  My husband walked over and he looked at me and he's like,
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  you're all over the place. I'm like, yeah, I am really.
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  I am. So it, it, it is not unusual to
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  have that happen. It common.
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  It's really, really common. But the trick, the trick you
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  have to nail down is hitting that pause button, hitting that
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  stop button so that you can just get yourself centered.
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  Take a deep breath. Where am I right now?
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  Getting yourself the primary, where you are in your head is
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  the distinction. And stop beating yourself up for
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  thinking that you fail at this all the time because most of us,
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  most of us are very capable of doing this.
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  Unless you have been diagnosed with something that tells you
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  you have a a disorder or an inability to manage this, the
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  majority of us can manage this if we follow the rules.
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  First of all, stop blaming yourself because the beatings
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  will continue until morale improved.
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  Never works ever works. Ever works doesn't get you where
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  you want to go, so you have to pause or stop, whichever word
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  works for you. And then you say, OK, what is my
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  biggest outcome right now? What is the thing that I want
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  more than anything right now? What is the thing that I need to
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  focus on more than anything right now?
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  And then do that. Do that one thing and then you
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  can you can bring yourself back to, you know that center of
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  saying, well, why do I think I fail at this all the time?
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  You don't fail it at all the time.
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  You may fail sometimes, we all do, I do, but it's not all the
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  time. It's it's incremental, it's
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  moment, it's just in the moments.
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  But you can bring yourself back and you just have to allow
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  yourself the space and the grace to say, yeah, OK, I had a
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  hiccup, I didn't fail 'cause if you don't give up, you don't
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  fail. That's the rule.
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  If you don't give up, you don't fail.
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  If you keep resetting, keep trying again, you are going to
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  get there. You're going to get to that
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  point if you keep working at it, if you keep asking better
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  questions, if you keep hitting the pause button and you keep
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  doing the right things, I promise you, you will get there.
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  So I hope you hope you guys have a great day.
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  I will see you tomorrow and work on this piece because it's
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  critical to success. Have a great one.
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  Bye.