Latest / The Mental Healness Podcast / Here Are 3 Reasons Narcissists Have Kids
Transcript
- 0:00What is going on, beautiful folks?
- 0:03Today we're talking about why do narcissists have kids in the 1st
- 0:07place? That's the question.
- 0:07Yeah. Why do narcissists, if they
- 0:09can't, if they can't love their kids, if they don't really want
- 0:12kids, why do narcissists have kids in the 1st place?
- 0:16We'll talk about a few different reasons.
- 0:18If you're new here, my name is Lee Hammock.
- 0:19I'm a diagnosed narcissist. And welcome to another episode
- 0:22of The Narcissist Code. Let's get it.
- 0:42Welcome back folks. Yes, narcissist and these pesky
- 0:47pesky children. Why do narcissist have kids?
- 0:50If they can't love kids, if they can't take care of, if they
- 0:53don't want to take care of their kids, why do they do it?
- 0:54If they only plan on abandoning their kids, why do they do this
- 0:58in the first? Why do they have them in the
- 0:59first place? So let me start by saying this
- 1:01y'all I do as a diagnosed narcissist myself, I do believe
- 1:05that narcissists do have the ability to love their kids like
- 1:09I do some of them, some some. Let me let me preface that I
- 1:13know people will hear that. And just like, well, Lee, you're
- 1:15lying, you lying ass beep you lying.
- 1:19Why? You got a lot of you got a lot
- 1:20of blah, blah, blah blah blah blah blah, blah, blah, blah.
- 1:22No, no, so I'm serious yo. There are a lot of narcissists
- 1:26who do possess the ability to care about their kids, but it
- 1:30might not be to the might not be to the quality that you want,
- 1:34the quality that you feel like your kids deserve.
- 1:36It might not be up to that quality.
- 1:39So I do think that a lot of narcissists can love their kids.
- 1:42They just struggle with it, right?
- 1:44And I'll say this as well, y'all, there are a lot of
- 1:47narcissistic people, a lot of toxic people, whatever you want
- 1:49to call them that don't love the kids.
- 1:52There are some that absolutely do not care about the kids.
- 1:54The kids are hindrances to their lives, all of the above, right?
- 1:59But for those they do, yeah, they can.
- 2:01So one reason why narcissists do have kids is because drum roll,
- 2:07please. They want unconditional love.
- 2:12Same reason that some of them have pets, right?
- 2:15And it's not me trying to compare kids to pets because I I
- 2:18know some people will. Some people don't like that.
- 2:20Well, like some narcissists have kids just because they expect
- 2:26the children to love them unconditionally.
- 2:29You get this. Yeah, I'm just being real.
- 2:31I'm being 100% dead honest, serious with you.
- 2:33Some narcissistic people only have children because they want
- 2:38unconditional love. Like they think that having a
- 2:41kid, like, like, like who? I got to do so much for
- 2:44everybody else to love me. Who's going to love me?
- 2:47Oh, let me have a baby. And This is why a lot of times
- 2:50you get these toxic ass narcissistic moms out here who
- 2:54just just have their kids and just treat their kids horribly
- 2:57but still expect their kids to take care of them.
- 3:00You have their these toxic narcissistic ass fathers out
- 3:03here. They might have kids and
- 3:06abandoned those kids and still expect those kids to respect
- 3:10them. I'm your daddy.
- 3:12You better respect me even though I haven't seen you in 10
- 3:15years. What?
- 3:18I'm your daddy. You better listen to me.
- 3:20Even though I. Ain't you I I I didn't.
- 3:21I never came to any of your events even though I never paid
- 3:23child support. I never did this.
- 3:24I never did that. You better listen to me.
- 3:26I'm your dad. I gave birth to you.
- 3:26I'm. Your Mama.
- 3:28You going to talk to me that way?
- 3:30Wow. Wow.
- 3:32I'm your Mama. You owe me.
- 3:33You. You know how much pain I was in
- 3:35when I pushed you out? Wow, you owe me.
- 3:38I don't care if I'm I'm abusing you.
- 3:40I'm your Mama. Wow, Wow.
- 3:43Don't that y'all? Don't that sound crazy?
- 3:46Some narcissists only have kids because they expect
- 3:49unconditional love from those children.
- 3:52They expect that no matter what they do, that those kids are
- 3:55supposed to love, care, honor, respect them, cherish them no
- 3:58matter what they do to them. That's the truth right there,
- 4:00y'all. So some narcissists only have
- 4:02kids because they want that unconditional love.
- 4:07The next reason I'll go over here y'all is because they want
- 4:12to trap you. Let's be real, narcissist want
- 4:16to trap you. Some narcissist want to keep you
- 4:18around. Some narcissist absolutely want
- 4:20to keep you there with them. So they trap you.
- 4:23They will y'all be for real. They will trap you.
- 4:27They will trap you like they think they're having a baby will
- 4:30keep you around. So some of them will absolutely
- 4:33they feel like you're going to leave them.
- 4:34Some of them will absolutely get pregnant by you.
- 4:38Some of them will absolutely put a put a baby in you.
- 4:42You know what I'm saying? They want to try to trap you to
- 4:44stay with them and be around them.
- 4:46That's that's the quickest way. I love this person and I don't
- 4:50want this person to ever be out of my life.
- 4:52What what what will keep them here?
- 4:55Maybe treating them better, maybe listening to them, maybe
- 4:59communicate with them, maybe doing that.
- 5:01No, no, no, no. A baby.
- 5:04Yeah. He's that crazy that sounds that
- 5:05little Angel and little devil on their sides.
- 5:08And the Angel is like, treat them better, communicate with
- 5:10them, respect them, stop cheating on them.
- 5:13The devil's like you have a baby.
- 5:17What? But you know me.
- 5:19But this. Yeah.
- 5:22Yeah. I don't script these.
- 5:23That's why I'll be laughing about.
- 5:24So I say some stupid ass stuff, but it's just true.
- 5:28That's the truth of the matter right there.
- 5:29Yeah, but I'll say this as well. But this is what you get when
- 5:32you're dealing with narcissistic people.
- 5:34This is truly what you get. Like some of them only have kids
- 5:37because they want to trap you and keep you around.
- 5:39They really, really do. They want to trap you, keep you
- 5:42around and just feel like even though they some of them might
- 5:44not take care of their kids, some of them might actually
- 5:47abandoned their kids. They feel like because they have
- 5:50kids with you, they still have some type of access to you.
- 5:53They feel like they still have some type of access to you.
- 5:56They feel like they're still sometimes like, you can't just
- 5:58leave me alone. You can't just cut me off
- 5:59because we have kids together. So This is why you have to be
- 6:02very careful about who you have kids with, right?
- 6:05Because some of these bastards are here only want kids to kind
- 6:08of keep you around. And that's just the truth.
- 6:09Yeah. And I hate to even say it like
- 6:13that because that's just the truth of how it goes.
- 6:15You know another reason that these toxic some of these toxic
- 6:18narcissistic people have kids is to look normal.
- 6:24Some narcissists just want to look normal.
- 6:28Some narcissists have kids, have children because they just want
- 6:32to look like normal human beings.
- 6:34They because this is this is what you're supposed to do,
- 6:37right? If you want to, if you want to
- 6:39be a human being, if you want to look like a real person, if you
- 6:42want to do this, if you want to do that, you have kids, right?
- 6:45How do I, how how am I supposed to look normal?
- 6:47Oh, let me have his kids. This is the exact same way this
- 6:50side to fit fit into society, right?
- 6:52You have you, you get married, you have kids, you go to school,
- 6:56you buy a house, you do the normal things that are supposed
- 7:00to make you look human. This is what narcissist This is
- 7:03one of the reasons why narcissists have children.
- 7:05Just because they think this is this is what they're supposed to
- 7:07do, you know, they think that this is the only way to do for
- 7:10them to fit in. The only way for them to do what
- 7:12they need to do, only way for them to look human or look more
- 7:15human or look more like a person is to have kids.
- 7:18Like I said in the beginning to my said in the beginning, some
- 7:21Dorses don't even care about their kids, don't even care
- 7:25about their their partners. So it's just like I don't care
- 7:29about my partners at all. But I was a butt rider, big old
- 7:33butt. But I'm going to have them
- 7:37anyway because it makes me look like a human being.
- 7:40Makes me, it gives off the, IT just gives off the impression
- 7:45that I'm a happily, happily, happily fully functioning human
- 7:49being. So that's why some narcissists
- 7:52have kids, because it makes them look like humans.
- 7:55It makes us look like real people.
- 7:57Like they might not even want y'all, let's be real.
- 7:59They might not even want kids. They might not even really,
- 8:03really, really want kids. But because they want to fit in,
- 8:07because they want to look normal, because they want to
- 8:09look like a person, they still have them anyway.
- 8:12And is that fair to the people, to the kids of these
- 8:15narcissists? Hell no.
- 8:17It's not fair. Why would it be fair?
- 8:19No, it's not fair to have a toxic, abusive, narcissistic
- 8:22parent that had you just because they trap somebody else.
- 8:25It's not fair to be to be birth to a narcissistic person that
- 8:29can't love you. They just had you to fit in.
- 8:31They just had you because they expected you to love them
- 8:33unconditionally no matter what the hell they did to you.
- 8:36That's not fair at all to don't even think that.
- 8:39Yeah, don't even believe that. That's fair.
- 8:40That's insane to believe it's fair to be treated like crap
- 8:43because your parent doesn't can't, can't love you.
- 8:46It's that's great. That's insane.
- 8:48You don't like, I'll say this right here, y'all, you don't owe
- 8:50your parents anything. And that's one of the craziest
- 8:52things about narcissist. Narcissist.
- 8:55We think you owe us everything. We think you owe us your life.
- 8:57We think you owe us your allegiance.
- 8:59We think you owe us your unconditional love.
- 9:01We think you owe us everything. But in, in reality, you don't
- 9:05owe us anything. You absolutely do not owe us
- 9:09anything at all because you didn't ask to be born.
- 9:13You didn't ask for any of this. Like the narcissistic person
- 9:17typically throws this type of stuff in there at you and
- 9:19tortures you. They do this kind of crazy ass
- 9:21stuff to you because it allows them to feel like a person,
- 9:24allows them to feel human, allows them to feel like they
- 9:27are this just wonderful person. It allows them to fit in.
- 9:32It allows them like, it's not fair, y'all, they don't have,
- 9:34they have kids for all the wrong reasons right now.
- 9:36Is it possible for some narcissists to have kids because
- 9:39they think that they just want them and they just want to be,
- 9:42they actually want to be a real parent and try.
- 9:44Yeah, that's possible, y'all. They can try.
- 9:47And sometimes, sometimes if you're the child of a
- 9:48narcissist, you can tell that they're trying.
- 9:50You're like, well, my mom gave me, my mom tried as hard as she
- 9:53could. She just could not.
- 9:54She, my mom tried as hard as she could.
- 9:56She just could not love me like I needed to be loved.
- 9:58My mom tried his heart. My mom did everything that she
- 10:00could, she could do, but she just could not give me the love
- 10:03that I, the full love of my needy.
- 10:04My dad tried, but he was just disconnected, right.
- 10:08That you hear that? I do hear that all the time from
- 10:10people that are that have narcissistic parents and
- 10:12whatnot, that, yeah, that they are trying.
- 10:15It's just like trying and doing are two totally different things
- 10:20when you get down to the nitty gritty of you.
- 10:22That's the thing, yeah. Anyway, y'all, thanks for making
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- 11:11Peace.