Latest / bit of a Rambler / 166 You Belong

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166 You Belong · bit of a Rambler

0:00
Speaker 1: Hello, my name is Kai, and I am a bit
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Speaker 1: of a rambler. I like to travel, learn, and tell stories.
0:08
Speaker 1: And today I got another quote that is specifically about books,
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Speaker 1: but relates to many, many, many activities, and I think
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Speaker 1: especially travel. That is part of the beauty of all literature.
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Speaker 1: You discover that your longings are universal longing. That you're
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Speaker 1: not lonely and isolated from anyone. You belong. F. Scott Fitzgerald.
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Speaker 1: That fella who wrote The Great Gatsby, which I still
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Speaker 1: haven't re-read, or even seen that famous adaptation with, um,
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Speaker 1: Leo DiCaprio? I don't know, I haven't seen it. Maybe
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Speaker 1: I'll like it when I read it again. But this
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Speaker 1: quote stuck out to me, again, because that is part
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Speaker 1: of the beauty of traveling. It might be the most...
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Speaker 1: significant impact on me that traveling has had overall. Maybe
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Speaker 1: significant is too broad a word. It's certainly the most
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Speaker 1: personally transformative effect that travel has had on me. The money,
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Speaker 1: the great healthcare, amazing housing, all the tangible benefits have
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Speaker 1: been life-changing for me, completely life-changing. Retiring early, that's crazy.
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Speaker 1: But personally, inside, Knowing that I belong in the world,
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Speaker 1: and that everywhere I go there are people like me,
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Speaker 1: no matter what the surface says, has made a remarkable
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Speaker 1: difference in how I live and interact with the world
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Speaker 1: and everybody inside it. Everything inside it. Everything that is
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Speaker 1: a part of the world. Many of the immediate benefits,
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Speaker 1: the more tangible benefits of traveling... Extremely low cost of living,
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Speaker 1: early retirement, more money, tons of free time. That stuff
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Speaker 1: is very important to me and to many people and
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Speaker 1: is impersonal. It allows me to explore and be honest
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Speaker 1: with myself and find out what I really want from
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Speaker 1: life and how I want to live my life. But
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Speaker 1: they aren't personal impacts on me. They're circumstances that by
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Speaker 1: taking a flight, by taking a plane somewhere, I can
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Speaker 1: enjoy or rather participate in. If I'm paying college tuition
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Speaker 1: or university tuition in the United States and it's $ 15, 000
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Speaker 1: a semester, I can go to Italy and as a
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Speaker 1: foreign student I can pay national rates or Spain or
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Speaker 1: Portugal and I can pay $ 1, 500. I can pay 90%
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Speaker 1: less for the exact same education with the same accreditation
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Speaker 1: But that doesn't change who I am or how I
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Speaker 1: feel in connection to the world, as Fitzgerald is talking
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Speaker 1: about here. It allows me to explore myself and to
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Speaker 1: reckon with myself how I relate to the rest of
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Speaker 1: the world and what the rest of the world means
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Speaker 1: to me and what everyone else on the planet means
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Speaker 1: to me. When I left the U.S., that country... and
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Speaker 1: really just the handful of cities I had lived in
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Speaker 1: up to that point, were my entire world. I knew
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Speaker 1: other countries existed intellectually, and I had met people from
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Speaker 1: other countries, but I was seeing them as interlopers into
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Speaker 1: the world I understood that was the world, capital T,
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Speaker 1: capital W. Like the United States, the handful of cities,
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Speaker 1: the tiny metropolitan parts in those cities, the neighborhoods of
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Speaker 1: those cities that I had lived my entire life in
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Speaker 1: up to that point. Such a small, minuscule geographic region
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Speaker 1: of the world. Not to mention basically a single culture,
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Speaker 1: a monoculture. I was like, yeah, that's the world and
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Speaker 1: that's how I understand the world. And this probably has
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Speaker 1: most of what the world has to offer. And often
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Speaker 1: when I heard something I disagreed with, I disagreed with
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Speaker 1: it because it was antithetical to my cultural dicta. It
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Speaker 1: was not what my culture said things were. I hadn't
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Speaker 1: examined my own motivations, and I felt separate from any
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Speaker 1: new ideas and cultures that I hadn't grown up with
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Speaker 1: and been surrounded by. I grew up in the U.S.,
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Speaker 1: and there are ideas there that are completely different in
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Speaker 1: other countries. You can eat horses in Italy, whales in Japan,
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Speaker 1: men wear dresses in tons of countries. And for a
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Speaker 1: very long time, I thought I was disagreeing or found
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Speaker 1: other cultures, traditions disagreeable because I had thought through the
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Speaker 1: issue and I had arrived at the right conclusion. But
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Speaker 1: the more I traveled, the more clearly incorrect that became.
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Speaker 1: That all of that stuff, what people eat, how they dress,
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Speaker 1: the idioms they use, are surface-level expressions of culture. And
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Speaker 1: that's all they really are. The people at their core
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Speaker 1: are exactly like me. The circumstances that one grows up
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Speaker 1: in dictates how they express themselves, how we are able
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Speaker 1: to relate to one another and show the world what
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Speaker 1: who we are. But traveling, you will discover that, as
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Speaker 1: Fitzgerald says, your longings are universal longings. You are not
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Speaker 1: lonely and isolated from anyone. And a lot of travelers
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Speaker 1: feel isolated because when they start traveling because they get
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Speaker 1: closer to these surface level that can be very strong.
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Speaker 1: You know, if you're in China and you go into
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Speaker 1: a restaurant, people will be speaking very loudly at the
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Speaker 1: waiters and waitresses when they order food. They're not angry.
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Speaker 1: They're not shouting. You have to speak louder for tonal
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Speaker 1: languages in general so that you can differentiate the tones
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Speaker 1: in a homophonic syllable. But when you're in there for
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Speaker 1: the first time and you hear people shouting all around you,
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Speaker 1: it can be very jarring and disorienting if you take
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Speaker 1: that as a fundamental personal difference of that other culture
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Speaker 1: rather than the superficial expression of language that it is.
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Speaker 1: They just express language differently in Mandarin or Cantonese. You
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Speaker 1: gotta yell. Otherwise, ma sounds like ma. They sound... The
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Speaker 1: same if you're not yelling very loud. But if you
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Speaker 1: can speak Mandarin or Spanish or French, German, Italian, I've
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Speaker 1: talked to people from everywhere, Arabic, if you can speak
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Speaker 1: their language, it's so, and especially if you connect on something,
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Speaker 1: if it turns out you were both charcoal artists or
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Speaker 1: it turns out both of your parents made you learn
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Speaker 1: instruments when you were younger, it is amazing how rapidly
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Speaker 1: All of the cultural trappings drop away, and how insignificant
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Speaker 1: they seem when you both found out that your parents
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Speaker 1: made you practice instruments from a young age. Instantly, you're like,
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Speaker 1: that is our shared experience, and I know you now,
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Speaker 1: and you know me now. More than the fact that
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Speaker 1: you use a fork, I use chopsticks. More than the
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Speaker 1: fact you wear a dress, I wear trousers. You eat couscous,
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Speaker 1: I eat rice. All of those things that can seem very,
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Speaker 1: like very big differences when you're sharing a meal and
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Speaker 1: you try couscous for the first time, you're like, my God,
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Speaker 1: this is nothing like rice. This is so interesting. They
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Speaker 1: grew up in a whole different thing. All of that
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Speaker 1: in a minute falls away if you're like, oh, your
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Speaker 1: parents were strict to you as well. Your parents were
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Speaker 1: very hard on you. My parents were very hard on me.
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Speaker 1: You've had your heart broken. I know what that is like.
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Speaker 1: You're excited about some new experience or opportunity. I know
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Speaker 1: exactly what that feels like. That sort of connection instantly
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Speaker 1: forges an understanding that transcends any superficial food, clothes, political ideology, even.
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Speaker 1: The connection of things that are personal, and especially like
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Speaker 1: the base things, like I want someone to share my
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Speaker 1: life with. I want stable or comfortable housing to reside within.
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Speaker 1: I want enough food. I want enough money to do
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Speaker 1: what I want. I want to express myself, creatively or otherwise.
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Speaker 1: I want people to know who I am. I have
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Speaker 1: talked to, who knows, thousands of people recently. Just since
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Speaker 1: I've started traveling, I've talked to thousands of people. It's
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Speaker 1: the nature, I've mentioned on other podcasts, of being a traveler.
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Speaker 1: People want to know what your perspective is, and they
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Speaker 1: want to validate their own experience against others. travelers, or
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Speaker 1: they just want a sounding board from a traveler because
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Speaker 1: they know you're going to have, as a traveler, a
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Speaker 1: different perspective on their life. If you're living in the
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Speaker 1: same neighborhood and you're a complete stranger, I can tell
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Speaker 1: you something, but I'm probably not going to get a
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Speaker 1: different perspective from you because you're in the same neighborhood.
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Speaker 1: You're kind of in the same... You're in the same...
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Speaker 1: All those superficial instances, we're sharing all of that culture together.
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Speaker 1: But if I talk to someone from... Italy who has
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Speaker 1: been traveling for seven years, whatever, seven months, seven days,
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Speaker 1: and I tell them about my life, I know that
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Speaker 1: whatever I say, one of my ideas or memories are
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Speaker 1: going to bounce off something that they know to be
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Speaker 1: true because of their cultural experience growing up. So I'm
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Speaker 1: going to get this other perspective that will ultimately let
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Speaker 1: me know we share something in common. Both of us
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Speaker 1: wanted our parents to not be as difficult. Even if
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Speaker 1: we think about it in different ways, I may say, yeah,
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Speaker 1: my parents were pretty hard on me. They made me
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Speaker 1: do really well in school. They pushed me really hard.
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Speaker 1: And then my Chinese friend might say, oh, yeah, my
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Speaker 1: parents were actually pretty easygoing. They said as long as
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Speaker 1: I get a B plus or higher, I'm fine. And
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Speaker 1: I only had to do four extracurricular activities a week
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Speaker 1: versus my parents who insisted on no extracurricular activities and
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Speaker 1: were like, if you pass, you pass. We might be
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Speaker 1: thinking about the same thing in different ways. I find
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Speaker 1: that happens all the time. I'll explain why. how I
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Speaker 1: feel about something to someone, they'll explain something back, and
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Speaker 1: then I'll realize, like, oh no, we're arguing for the
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Speaker 1: same point. We're just coming at it from different angles,
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Speaker 1: but you and I are saying the exact same thing.
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Speaker 1: And the more I talk to people, and the more
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Speaker 1: I travel, the more it becomes so clear that everybody
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Speaker 1: is the same, that every human is basically living the
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Speaker 1: same life, just in a different color, in a different
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Speaker 1: shade of of reality. If you grew up in Morocco,
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Speaker 1: you're going to be wearing dresses more often than the
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Speaker 1: kid who grew up in Idaho. If you grow up
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Speaker 1: in Iceland, you're going to be eating a lot more
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Speaker 1: whale than the kid who grew up in Houston. But
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Speaker 1: both of those kids want someone to sit next to,
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Speaker 1: want someone to laugh with, someone to eat with. They
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Speaker 1: want good food. They want enough resources to take care
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Speaker 1: of themselves and those they care about. They want to
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Speaker 1: express themselves very often through music. Music is a huge
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Speaker 1: through line in human cultures. It really is the beauty
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Speaker 1: of travel for me to discover that the things that
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Speaker 1: I hold like baseline to, the things that are viscerally
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Speaker 1: important or spiritually important are the same things that are
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Speaker 1: spiritually important to every person in every single place. country
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Speaker 1: I have been to. I was in Cambodia, and I
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Speaker 1: met this guy. He carved animals from wood, and he
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Speaker 1: had another job, but he started carving animals from wood.
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Speaker 1: He really liked that. He pursued that because he felt better.
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Speaker 1: The art of creating something from inanimate matter meant something
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Speaker 1: to him. In the exact same way, I used to
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Speaker 1: draw comics, and once I started doing it, I didn't
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Speaker 1: make any money. I just drew webcomics for a long time,
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Speaker 1: for like 10 years, and I had a very fun
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Speaker 1: time doing it, but I didn't make any money from it.
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Speaker 1: He actually made money from his animal carving, so good
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Speaker 1: on you, Vichat. But when someone tells me that they
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Speaker 1: want to do something like that to sculpt or carve
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Speaker 1: or create something or paint or make music, I know
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Speaker 1: they're trying to tell me about the human... interest, the
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Speaker 1: human almost need to create that everyone I've met so
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Speaker 1: far has. The only thing that replaces it is it
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Speaker 1: seems like work. If you're really pressured and you have
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Speaker 1: no time, you can't do it. But even if you
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Speaker 1: can't do it, everybody wants to have that outlet of expression.
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Speaker 1: It's just that they often can't because they're trapped by
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Speaker 1: no time off or they have to help their boss
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Speaker 1: do whatever it is. But people want to express themselves.
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Speaker 1: I have several friends who paint. I have tons of
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Speaker 1: musical friends who need that creative outlet to express themselves fully.
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Speaker 1: They have to write the words down on the page
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Speaker 1: that are going through their mind because they only get
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Speaker 1: that release when they sing those songs out loud, when
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Speaker 1: they play those chords out loud, when they release it,
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Speaker 1: they express it. And I don't get to talk about
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Speaker 1: that with everyone. Not everyone is as in touch with
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Speaker 1: creativity expression as some people may be, and not everybody
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Speaker 1: thinks about things in the same way. But I have
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Speaker 1: had that experience in every country I've been in, dozens
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Speaker 1: to hundreds of times. I meet a guy from California
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Speaker 1: who needed to be in Thailand and play the guitar
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Speaker 1: for his hostel mates. I met the guy in Morocco
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Speaker 1: who needed to cook for everyone so they understood how
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Speaker 1: he understood his culture in the form of his couscous dish.
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Speaker 1: The Germans who made berry wine because it was their
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Speaker 1: creative expression of creating elderberry and blackberry wines that they
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Speaker 1: could sell at the local farmer's market. Even though these
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Speaker 1: were German people in a tiny German town... like thousands
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Speaker 1: of miles away from the United States, I had the
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Speaker 1: exact same conversation about wine with a vintner in Portland, Oregon.
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Speaker 1: They're the same people. They have the same expression. It
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Speaker 1: turns out they have the same avenue of creative expression
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Speaker 1: as this person thousands of miles away across the world
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Speaker 1: with this thousands of years old alcoholic brewing fermentation tradition.
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Speaker 1: So I see almost everything as a mutual expression of
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Speaker 1: creativity when someone shows me a skill. I don't think anymore, oh,
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Speaker 1: they paint, I don't paint. Oh, they play the didgeridoo,
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Speaker 1: I've never played a didgeridoo. It's so clear that anyone
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Speaker 1: performing or creating something, whether it's singing or visual art
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Speaker 1: or construction, whatever it is, whatever they are making has
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Speaker 1: such a strong resonance with Every other person I have
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Speaker 1: met in every other country I have met over and
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Speaker 1: over and over again. And it doesn't get boring because
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Speaker 1: the superficial differences. In Indonesia, there was this handmade pipe instrument.
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Speaker 1: It has like 40 pipes and they play all the
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Speaker 1: different pipes. It's amazing. And I've never seen that before.
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Speaker 1: But that person was so happy to express himself musically
16:49
Speaker 1: in the airport. Like he's an airport performer. But I
16:53
Speaker 1: talked to him and he was really passionate about his
16:57
Speaker 1: instrument and the fact that he was able to play
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Speaker 1: it for people. He was really happy when sometimes some
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Speaker 1: people were able to stop for a couple minutes and
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Speaker 1: listen to a whole song. And he loved to share.
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Speaker 1: And I was like, did you make these? And he
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Speaker 1: had made the entire instrument himself. Travel allows for this
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Speaker 1: fascinating privilege of connecting with the entire world. Another huge
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Speaker 1: part of it is very mundane. I go to, I
17:25
Speaker 1: don't know, what, 30-something countries now, and every country I
17:30
Speaker 1: go to, I land, and I walk five minutes in
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Speaker 1: any direction, and there's a large supermarket with local food,
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Speaker 1: a few imports, and the foods in there might be
17:40
Speaker 1: pretty different than the last country I was in, but
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Speaker 1: the feeling of going in there to the food center
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Speaker 1: and buying some food and seeing what's on the shelves
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Speaker 1: is the same. In every single country. And I land,
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Speaker 1: and there are trees, and maybe the trees look a
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Speaker 1: little different, but in the desert, there are trees. In
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Speaker 1: the Sahara, there are trees. In Germany, bunch of trees.
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Speaker 1: Rivers in every country. Ice shows up every country. There
18:10
Speaker 1: are houses, there are hotels, there are shoes, people are
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Speaker 1: wearing their clothes. I can make a charcoal drawing of
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Speaker 1: a tree, a charcoal drawing of a bed, a charcoal...
18:21
Speaker 1: drawing of a pomegranate. But if you look at all those,
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Speaker 1: you'll see, oh, these are charcoal drawings. These are the
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Speaker 1: expressions of the reality as this artist sees it. You'll
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Speaker 1: understand that charcoal drawings are the medium. And in the
18:37
Speaker 1: same way, when I go to different countries and I
18:41
Speaker 1: see the Mongolian hat, and I go to the U.S.
18:46
Speaker 1: or Ireland and I see the little writer's cap or
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Speaker 1: Those are just expressions of the same medium, covering a
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Speaker 1: cultural expression that also happens to cover your head because
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Speaker 1: it's chili. Or the couscous in Morocco, the potato salad
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Speaker 1: in the United States, the rice and beans, or probably
19:05
Speaker 1: just frijoles in Central South America. They're all expressions of
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Speaker 1: this staple that will fill us up. And the more
19:14
Speaker 1: I travel, the more every time I'm in a new place,
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Speaker 1: I see an expression of Of something I have seen before,
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Speaker 1: these people want good, tasty, comfort food. They want to
19:28
Speaker 1: sit around. They want to share this experience with other people.
19:32
Speaker 1: Some people want to sit and eat alone in a room.
19:34
Speaker 1: Some people want to watch a movie and eat. Some
19:36
Speaker 1: people want to sit at a table around with others
19:38
Speaker 1: and talk with each other. But everyone wants to have
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Speaker 1: that tasty meal. And it's reassuring. is a great word.
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Speaker 1: Whenever I go to a new country and I see
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Speaker 1: someone sigh and sit down and begin to eat, because
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Speaker 1: it's the exact same way that a Chinese guy sits down, sighs,
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Speaker 1: and gets ready to eat, that a German guy sighs,
20:05
Speaker 1: sits down, gets ready to eat. that I sigh and
20:09
Speaker 1: sit down, savor the food and get ready to eat.
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Speaker 1: Every human, every gender, everybody everywhere, in every country I've
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Speaker 1: been to, sits down and goes, here we go, time
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Speaker 1: to eat. There's shared human experiences everywhere. And you are
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Speaker 1: not lonely and isolated from anyone. You belong. Traveling makes
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Speaker 1: that so clear. especially if you attempt to participate in
20:37
Speaker 1: the culture that you're traveling to. There's this sort of
20:42
Speaker 1: backwards concept in the United States of appropriation, and appropriation
20:47
Speaker 1: can certainly happen. But if you are, there's a huge
20:51
Speaker 1: difference between appropriation and appreciation, and it often gets mixed
20:56
Speaker 1: up in the United States because it's such a culturally
20:59
Speaker 1: and geographically isolated country, they can't tell the difference. It
21:03
Speaker 1: would be like if you only had two colors in
21:06
Speaker 1: your country. We only have blue and purple in the
21:09
Speaker 1: United States. And then someone from Sweden is like, this
21:12
Speaker 1: is orange. And the United States is like, ah, I
21:14
Speaker 1: see a bright purple. Like that's how the United States
21:18
Speaker 1: interprets a lot of cultural differences. So appropriation and appreciation
21:23
Speaker 1: seem very similar in the States and they often get
21:25
Speaker 1: treated the same. But when you travel, it becomes so
21:31
Speaker 1: clear that people love it when you participate in their culture,
21:36
Speaker 1: just the same way that Texans will be validated by
21:40
Speaker 1: people enjoying their barbecue. They're like, ah, see, this was
21:43
Speaker 1: the right cultural avenue for us Texans to take. We
21:47
Speaker 1: make our barbecue like this, and you can see it's
21:49
Speaker 1: great because that person from another culture appreciates it, even
21:52
Speaker 1: though their barbecue is different. When you go to China
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Speaker 1: or Japan or Korea and you're using chopsticks as a foreigner...
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Speaker 1: That validates their cultural avenue of food utensils. You're using it,
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Speaker 1: therefore you're validating their choice in utensil. And everybody wants
22:14
Speaker 1: to be proud of the culture they grew up in.
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Speaker 1: They want to display these parts that other cultures also appreciate.
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Speaker 1: That is a fundamental human longing for the ability to
22:28
Speaker 1: share food, one's culture and have it appreciated by those from,
22:32
Speaker 1: especially from other cultures. So when you're traveling, you're going
22:36
Speaker 1: to come across people that want to share things with you.
22:39
Speaker 1: And if you appreciate their culture, that's not appropriation. You're
22:43
Speaker 1: appreciating it. If you don't normally use chopsticks, using chopsticks
22:47
Speaker 1: is not cultural appropriation. Wearing a jalaba in Morocco is
22:51
Speaker 1: not cultural appropriation. Eating sushi is not cultural appropriation. It's
22:57
Speaker 1: appreciation for a salient expression of culture, which is what
23:03
Speaker 1: everybody wants to do with their culture. In the same
23:06
Speaker 1: way we want when someone says, hey, nice clothes, you
23:10
Speaker 1: chose to wear those garments. Hey, that's a really funny t-shirt.
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Speaker 1: That's a really pretty dress. It's nice to be appreciated
23:18
Speaker 1: for the choices we made, even if we didn't think
23:21
Speaker 1: about throwing that t-shirt on that day, even if we
23:24
Speaker 1: didn't think anything about making couscous rather than rice for
23:28
Speaker 1: a bunch of foreigners. The fact that our choices and
23:32
Speaker 1: our cultural expressions are being appreciated, that is fundamental everywhere
23:37
Speaker 1: I've been, and people love talking about it. Thailand talks
23:40
Speaker 1: about their great chili-stuffed fish. China, of course, is very
23:46
Speaker 1: proud of all of their food. Japan, their comprehensive, holistic
23:50
Speaker 1: look at the environment and urbanization. Iceland's volcanoes, Norway's fishing.
23:56
Speaker 1: Everyone's proud of their cultural... tradition, and they love it
24:00
Speaker 1: when people appreciate that. The more someone travels and the
24:03
Speaker 1: more they are able to appreciate about other cultures, the
24:08
Speaker 1: closer I find they feel to the entire world. Certainly
24:14
Speaker 1: that has been the case for me. The more I
24:17
Speaker 1: explore and the more I participate in other cultures and
24:20
Speaker 1: really just experience and exhibit appreciation for Other cultures, the
24:25
Speaker 1: closer I feel to everyone, because every time I say, wow,
24:29
Speaker 1: that qipao is very cool, that traditional dress is lovely,
24:35
Speaker 1: they're personally gratified, but they're also very happy that a
24:38
Speaker 1: different culture, someone who didn't, who grew up completely outside
24:43
Speaker 1: of qipao culture, could appreciate something like a qipao, or
24:48
Speaker 1: a kimono, or a 10-gallon hat. People want their culture
24:53
Speaker 1: to be validated and appreciated and accepted. And of course
24:56
Speaker 1: they do. And getting to travel like I do, I
24:59
Speaker 1: get to see that over and over and over again.
25:02
Speaker 1: And at this point, I've seen it so many times.
25:05
Speaker 1: I've seen so many instances of people agreeing and understanding
25:10
Speaker 1: each other because of the core values that we all
25:14
Speaker 1: hold as people that I worry far less now about
25:20
Speaker 1: going to a new place than I used to. I
25:24
Speaker 1: never worry that I'm going to arrive in a place
25:28
Speaker 1: and all of the people are going to be fundamentally
25:31
Speaker 1: different than me. I would be shocked if I ever
25:34
Speaker 1: landed in a place. I thought that was going to
25:36
Speaker 1: be China, the first country I went to outside of
25:40
Speaker 1: the United States. But after I learned some of the language,
25:43
Speaker 1: and I didn't even have to learn that much, even
25:45
Speaker 1: when I couldn't understand, I could see some of their
25:47
Speaker 1: movements were different. Chinese people generally sort of rock back
25:51
Speaker 1: and forth When they walk, it's a different gait, a
25:55
Speaker 1: walking gait, than other countries. You'll find different walking gaits
26:00
Speaker 1: in all countries. It's just one more cultural expression. So
26:05
Speaker 1: I was like, geez, they even walk different. How? And
26:08
Speaker 1: obviously the language is so different from what I'm used
26:10
Speaker 1: to as an English speaker. How can I... connect but
26:16
Speaker 1: by the third day i think maybe the third day
26:20
Speaker 1: i was having dinner with chinese friends and the ones
26:23
Speaker 1: who could speak english were implicitly relating to me that
26:29
Speaker 1: they had the exact same concerns and interests that i
26:34
Speaker 1: did about life they were very interested in other countries
26:38
Speaker 1: they were concerned that people thought china was weird in
26:42
Speaker 1: the same way that americans were are like, what do
26:45
Speaker 1: Japanese people think about the United States? Like, how is
26:49
Speaker 1: the other culture judging us? And I met musicians, Chinese musicians,
26:54
Speaker 1: who were just like the U.S. musicians I knew. I
26:57
Speaker 1: met painters and artists who were just like the painters
26:59
Speaker 1: and artists I knew from back in the States. So
27:02
Speaker 1: where have I seen this while traveling? The guy who
27:05
Speaker 1: told me about the Lake Singranacocha, the most amazing lake
27:10
Speaker 1: I've seen in my life, probably, next to a glacier.
27:13
Speaker 1: I was sitting next to this guy in a sushi
27:16
Speaker 1: restaurant in Cusco, Peru, and I asked him, did they
27:19
Speaker 1: use honey on sushi? Because they gave me two little carafts,
27:23
Speaker 1: and one tasted like honey. And he was like, yeah,
27:24
Speaker 1: it's common in Peru to get one caraft of soy sauce,
27:27
Speaker 1: one of honey, and you can choose which one you
27:29
Speaker 1: want to put on your sushi. And you know what?
27:31
Speaker 1: The honey was pretty good. But he asked me where
27:33
Speaker 1: I was from, and then I asked him some questions,
27:36
Speaker 1: which town he was from, and there was instantly a
27:39
Speaker 1: connection of traveling and hiking and being excited about things,
27:43
Speaker 1: even though my Spanish was terrible and his English was
27:48
Speaker 1: better than my Spanish, we'll say. He had grown up
27:50
Speaker 1: in Cusco his whole life. We were two very different people,
27:54
Speaker 1: but as soon as I was like, oh, you climb
27:58
Speaker 1: the mountains around here? He's like, oh yeah, you do too?
28:00
Speaker 1: And then boom, instant connection, and... Every time something like
28:05
Speaker 1: that happens, just like it did here, I felt like, oh,
28:07
Speaker 1: I belong here. I belong here because I like climbing
28:10
Speaker 1: mountains and all these Peruvian people like climbing mountains. When
28:13
Speaker 1: you're at the top of a mountain and just looking
28:15
Speaker 1: over the world, everyone is just a little bit awestruck.
28:19
Speaker 1: It's just a little more amazing standing on top of
28:21
Speaker 1: that peak or finding secret lakes or a glacier. There's
28:26
Speaker 1: this instant amazement, even with people who don't travel or
28:30
Speaker 1: people who've been in their country their whole lives like
28:31
Speaker 1: this guy. Once you talk about how exciting it is
28:34
Speaker 1: to see a piece of nature or a wild animal,
28:37
Speaker 1: instant human spiritual connection, undefinable connection, just forms right away,
28:43
Speaker 1: and you're friends with this person. And we ended up
28:45
Speaker 1: talking for an hour, and I went to that place
28:47
Speaker 1: a week later, and it was the most amazing... It's
28:50
Speaker 1: one of the most amazing places I've ever been on Earth. 15,000
28:52
Speaker 1: feet elevation, wild alpacas running around, crystal clear glacier streams,
28:58
Speaker 1: and the glacier beyond the most amazing lake I've ever seen.
29:03
Speaker 1: And I didn't need to talk to that guy. We
29:06
Speaker 1: were next to each other, but our tables weren't very close.
29:09
Speaker 1: And I leaned over because I wanted to make him
29:12
Speaker 1: a connection. I didn't really care about the honey that much.
29:14
Speaker 1: I was curious. But I also just wanted to talk
29:17
Speaker 1: to someone while I was eating my food. So I
29:20
Speaker 1: reached out to make this connection. Hey, is this honey?
29:23
Speaker 1: Is that common in Peru? I asked if it's honey,
29:26
Speaker 1: and he said yes. And then I asked a follow-up,
29:28
Speaker 1: is that common in Peru to serve honey with sushi?
29:31
Speaker 1: And he was like, oh yeah, and that's what started
29:33
Speaker 1: it going. He was like, so you're not from here,
29:35
Speaker 1: so where are you from? And connection. And it's not just... amazing,
29:42
Speaker 1: awe-inspiring things like standing on top of a 15,000 foot mountain.
29:47
Speaker 1: It can be very normal things too. Also in Cusco, actually,
29:52
Speaker 1: I was walking down the street and this parade started
29:54
Speaker 1: up and there were literally hundreds of dancers going down
29:57
Speaker 1: the street and all ages, just dancing, very elaborate costumes.
30:02
Speaker 1: And I was like, what the heck is going on?
30:03
Speaker 1: And I went in to, I had gone in like
30:06
Speaker 1: maybe five minutes earlier to buy a pizza and then
30:08
Speaker 1: this parade went by. And I asked this girl who
30:13
Speaker 1: was making the pizza, hey, what are they dancing for?
30:18
Speaker 1: And she went outside and she was like, oh, I
30:22
Speaker 1: don't even know why they're dancing. I think they just
30:25
Speaker 1: like to dance. Yeah. And in my head, I was like, well,
30:28
Speaker 1: there's got to be a celebration. But the look she
30:31
Speaker 1: gave me when she was like, I think they just
30:32
Speaker 1: like to dance is the exact same thing I feel
30:35
Speaker 1: all the time. When I look at someone doing something
30:37
Speaker 1: and I was, I guess they just like to do that.
30:40
Speaker 1: And there's these very human emotions that are complex. But
30:45
Speaker 1: when you see the look on someone else's face and
30:47
Speaker 1: the way they say something, it just seems so, you know,
30:51
Speaker 1: exactly how they're feeling. You can empathize exactly with that
30:54
Speaker 1: moment that they're feeling in time. I again and again,
30:59
Speaker 1: I get these connections. And every time I do, I
31:03
Speaker 1: feel more like I belong. My longings, my emotions are
31:10
Speaker 1: the same emotions that everybody has, regardless of where they're from.
31:14
Speaker 1: When I was in Morocco, I went with a friend
31:17
Speaker 1: and we climbed to the top of a sand dune
31:19
Speaker 1: with a guide. We rode camels and we're sitting on
31:22
Speaker 1: top of sand dune. And I actually brought a bag
31:25
Speaker 1: of strawberries from the store with me. And I asked
31:29
Speaker 1: the guy, the guide at the top, like, hey, man,
31:33
Speaker 1: you want some strawberries? He's like, no, no, no. But
31:36
Speaker 1: then I saw him like looking down at the strawberries.
31:38
Speaker 1: And I was like, really, go ahead. I have a
31:40
Speaker 1: whole bag. I'm not going to go for it. He's like, oh, OK.
31:44
Speaker 1: And he grabbed one strawberry. I do that constantly. I'm
31:48
Speaker 1: always someone kind in another country or anywhere will offer
31:52
Speaker 1: me something. Hey, do you want a beer? Oh, no,
31:54
Speaker 1: I'm good, thank you. Are you sure? Here. Okay. Sure. That, like,
32:01
Speaker 1: bashful acceptance, I've seen that repeated hundreds of times in
32:06
Speaker 1: every situation. Oh, you want to try this steak? No, no, no.
32:09
Speaker 1: Are you sure it's really good? Okay, yeah, I'll try it,
32:12
Speaker 1: I'll try it. All the time that happens, and every
32:15
Speaker 1: single time that happens, especially when I'm in another country,
32:19
Speaker 1: I feel a little more like I belong in this world, because...
32:22
Speaker 1: The bashful acceptance I have of a gift is the
32:25
Speaker 1: same bashful acceptance that this Moroccan guy has and Chinese
32:29
Speaker 1: people have. Everybody has it. Every human I know has
32:32
Speaker 1: experienced and given that experience to someone else in their
32:37
Speaker 1: life so many times. I mean, in China, it just
32:40
Speaker 1: constantly happens. They can see, obviously, I'm not Chinese. So
32:43
Speaker 1: especially when I was living out in the town, like outside,
32:48
Speaker 1: 45 minutes outside of Beijing... I could walk into a
32:52
Speaker 1: restaurant and not every time, certainly, but like one out
32:56
Speaker 1: of 10 times, if it was like drinking time, which
33:00
Speaker 1: is evening for Chinese people, if they saw me drinking alone,
33:06
Speaker 1: they might try to talk to me. And if I
33:07
Speaker 1: talked to them a little bit, they'd be like, here,
33:10
Speaker 1: have a beer. And I'd always be like, I don't know.
33:13
Speaker 1: And then they'd be like, no, no, drink it, drink it,
33:15
Speaker 1: drink it. And they're so excited to drink with a foreigner.
33:18
Speaker 1: And I would start drinking. I stopped saying no after
33:22
Speaker 1: like the fifth time it happened. But whenever I took
33:25
Speaker 1: my friends or my employees at the time out to dinner,
33:29
Speaker 1: and I would offer them something, they would do the
33:31
Speaker 1: exact same thing. No, no, no, no, no. And I
33:34
Speaker 1: wanted to talk to them. And so I wanted to
33:36
Speaker 1: buy them a beer or a plate of dry fried
33:40
Speaker 1: string beans or whatever I wanted to buy them, green beans.
33:43
Speaker 1: And they'd say no, and then they'd bashfully accept. There's
33:46
Speaker 1: these human... There are so many... human emotions and little
33:52
Speaker 1: quirks that humans have that are not particular to a country.
33:56
Speaker 1: No matter how someone grew up, there is something human
34:01
Speaker 1: with the side smile or the big eyes when they're surprised,
34:05
Speaker 1: or there are human things deeper than and apart from
34:10
Speaker 1: the cultural coverings that we're all wearing all the time.
34:15
Speaker 1: There was a Japanese guy who stopped to ask how
34:17
Speaker 1: I was doing while I was eating sushi on like
34:21
Speaker 1: this bridge overlooking the bay between the mainland and Matsuyama.
34:28
Speaker 1: And I was like, it's just such a nice day.
34:31
Speaker 1: And he looked out at the bay and he was like,
34:34
Speaker 1: it is such a nice day. And we just shared
34:37
Speaker 1: that moment of staring at the beautiful bay between mainland
34:42
Speaker 1: Japan and Matsuyama. Or at that same place, I met
34:47
Speaker 1: these two French people at a dinner party with that
34:49
Speaker 1: Japanese guy. He invited me. They were staying at his house.
34:54
Speaker 1: And when I asked them how the ride was, they
34:56
Speaker 1: just they gave me that look like it was amazing.
34:59
Speaker 1: I'm exhausted. And I gave them I was like, yep,
35:03
Speaker 1: I bike packed for three months in Vietnam. I know
35:05
Speaker 1: exactly what you're talking about. It's amazing. But you're on
35:08
Speaker 1: the road for 10 hours and now you just want
35:10
Speaker 1: to not do anything and even talk about cycling until
35:13
Speaker 1: you have to get back on your bicycle. It's these
35:17
Speaker 1: little moments that are so universal and so commonly experienced,
35:21
Speaker 1: so often experienced by someone. And I get to experience
35:26
Speaker 1: them over and over again in every country I've been
35:28
Speaker 1: to so far. I haven't been to a single country
35:31
Speaker 1: where I don't get that little spark of human soul.
35:36
Speaker 1: I'm like, oh, yep, humans do that. We do connect
35:40
Speaker 1: on that. Or when someone tells me, you know, all
35:43
Speaker 1: the problems with the United States, but your national parks
35:46
Speaker 1: are amazing. I see the exact same thing and I
35:49
Speaker 1: feel kind of good. I'm like, yeah, yeah, my national
35:51
Speaker 1: parks of my country are amazing despite all the other problems.
35:56
Speaker 1: And I go to Cambodia and they'll ask me how
35:58
Speaker 1: Cambodia is. I'm like, it's beautiful. I love the trees.
36:01
Speaker 1: They're so lush and the food's amazing. And you can
36:04
Speaker 1: just see the person like proudly, yeah, yeah, my food
36:07
Speaker 1: is amazing. My My landscape is amazing. The rivers are
36:10
Speaker 1: pretty cool to look at and glimmery shiny. Love it.
36:14
Speaker 1: I love it. So Fitz, I should be reading The
36:17
Speaker 1: Great Gatsby. I should read that again. And I guess
36:19
Speaker 1: your other books, because I've only heard one person ever
36:22
Speaker 1: talk about another Fitzgerald book. But then I'm not in
36:25
Speaker 1: academic circles at all. That is part of the beauty
36:28
Speaker 1: of all literature. Or travel, as I would say. You
36:32
Speaker 1: discover that your longings are universal longings. That you're not
36:36
Speaker 1: lonely and isolated from anyone. You belong. So many travelers
36:42
Speaker 1: express that to me in different words. They say it
36:45
Speaker 1: all the time. The more I travel around, the more
36:49
Speaker 1: every country makes me feel closer to them. And it
36:53
Speaker 1: really does. I feel more comfortable in this world and
36:56
Speaker 1: more comfortable talking to people in general because I go
37:01
Speaker 1: in these places that on their surface, you think, oh,
37:04
Speaker 1: completely different, different language, different clothing, different food. different attitudes,
37:08
Speaker 1: different behaviors, different cultural context. But then those moments show up.
37:15
Speaker 1: Awestruck or the bashful acceptance or whatever these tiny emotions
37:19
Speaker 1: are that all humans share, regardless of where they're from
37:22
Speaker 1: and how they behave even, is very connecting. It's beautiful.
37:29
Speaker 1: I hope you're having a beautiful day. You can talk
37:31
Speaker 1: to me at bitofarambler at gmail.com or bitofarambler on Blue
37:34
Speaker 1: Sky and Lemmy. I'm just hanging out. Have a good
37:39
Speaker 1: rest of your day.