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Perfectly Flawed: The Kristy Laschober Story · Nightmare Success In and Out

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What happens when your worst fear becomes your reality?
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Hi, I'm Brent Cassidy, welcome to the Nightmare Success In and
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Out podcast where we explore how to overcome your fears and
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nightmares that set yourself free.
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We're going to be exploring this topic with guys that was in
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Leavenworth with and others who survived their own nightmare.
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These stories can be inspiring, sometimes sad.
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There's some humor, but hopefully you can come away with
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a nugget of something that'll help you knock down some of the
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prisons you built up in your own mind.
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All right, welcome back, nightmare success in and out.
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Listeners, we are back. What where you come to hear what
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happens when your worst fear becomes your reality reality.
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How do you adapt, survive, overcome, set yourself free.
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follow, subscribe, like comment, all those good things.
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Well, I have, I was just talking to Christy, my guest and I, I'm
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just fascinated by her story. It's just, it's a just an
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incredible story. And I want to I want to give a
1:03
shout out to Lynn Escapo for connecting us.
1:09
She's great and she's got a lot of people that she knows and she
1:12
connected me to Christy. But I want to give a little
1:17
background here of of Christy, because it's and and Christy,
1:23
the your name. I've we just went over it.
1:27
Lashober. Yeah.
1:29
Lash. OK.
1:31
Lashober, Lashober, Lashober. Yeah.
1:34
Christy Lashober, We went over it like three times and then I
1:40
It's OK. Yeah.
1:40
So Christy. She went from having a thriving
1:45
business as a wardrobe stylist in Southern California to meth
1:49
addiction and eventually ended up in prison.
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She was born with a medical condition and this led to her
1:55
becoming addicted to opioids as a child.
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After nearly ten years of sobriety and ending in a
2:02
marriage to police officer, Christy relapsed.
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The change in trajectory LED Christy to try and meth and
2:08
eventually selling to a Connecticut priest who the media
2:13
dubbed Monsignor Math and this story made national headlines.
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As a first time offender, she was sentenced to 60 months in
2:21
federal prison. Christie did her time in five
2:25
different facilities, including the last two years at a maximum
2:28
security in Texas. She was released in 2017 and hit
2:32
the ground running. She graduate graduated with
2:35
honors from Southern Oregon University and has become a
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fierce advocate for Prison Reform, leading the fight to
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remove the criminal history box on all college applications and
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her state, and advocating to provide opportunities for
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formerly incarcerated individuals to attend college.
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Christy is also the author of the book Perfectly Flawed,
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Uncovering Your Greatest Purpose.
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She founded Freedom of Exchange Project.
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I can't wait to jump into all this and unpack it.
3:05
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Success sent you. OK, Christy, thank you for being
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here today. How are you doing?
3:48
I'm. Doing great.
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The sun's out, so I'm happy about that.
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Yeah, you said you just went for a run down.
3:54
You were down in New Orleans, right?
3:57
Yes. How is New Orleans?
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New Orleans. Is it's wild.
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You know what? I just took a little video
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because I was talking to my mom on the phone and it got too loud
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because the the the boat that played the organ music got so
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loud. She was, where are you?
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I said. I'm on the Mississippi River and
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I feel like I live in adult Disneyland.
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It's just hilarious because I grew up right across the street
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from the Disneyland in Anaheim. So I'm like, I get to live here
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now. How?
4:25
Crazy is that, How crazy would that be to grow up as a kid
4:28
right next to Disneyland? I'm I mean, what a deal.
4:32
Yeah, it was our once a year trip that we got to take between
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my birthday and my sister's birthday.
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So in September, that was our that was our vacation place.
4:42
That was cool. Well, take us back a little bit,
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Christy. When you were growing up next to
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Disneyland, what, what was life like for you, you know, parents
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and siblings and what, what was going on in the world?
4:54
You know, I, I, I had a great life in regard to my family, in
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regard to the love and support I have, you know, mother and
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father that's were always supportive and lovely.
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And I have one sister who's, you know, I love her today.
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She's like my person. And so I, I had a, you know, I
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was someone who went to the beach every weekend.
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My mom grew up on Huntington Beach.
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Yeah. So we would always go to the
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beach and be in the water all day long, went to school, went
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to church on Sundays and on Wednesday nights.
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And so it was just a typical 1970, you know, a loving family.
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That sounds really nice. So you, I, I know you had and I
5:36
don't know when it started with you with the medical conditions
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and that what, how old were you when you realized that you was
5:44
it from birth or did it happen as it was from birth?
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Yeah, it was. I'm birth, so I was the first
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child and I was born with something called Vochterl
5:53
syndrome, which effects different parts of your body.
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And so that's led me to be in a hospital.
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I don't know how long I was in, you know, when I was born, but I
6:04
had my first operation at like 10 hours old.
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And then I've had more than 40 in, in my lifetime in the
6:11
majority of them prior to like say 2725 around there, it's a
6:16
lot of operation. So even though, yeah, when I
6:18
say, you know, it wasn't, but that was normal for me because
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I, you know, was born that way. So I kind of grew up in
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Children's Hospital. Did it take you like in and out
6:27
of school and those type of things?
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Yeah. Was it tough to be in that
6:34
situation growing up or did you not just really know any
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different and that's just the way you knew things?
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Yeah, I didn't know any difference.
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I think now as a person who's done a lot of work, inner work,
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I see that I was, which I think goes on in a lot of trauma is
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that you kind of disconnect from yourself.
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You know, Children's Hospital was my other home and so I, and
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so was getting a massive amounts of pain Med medicine, you know,
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Demerol and Dilaudid and Vicodin and morphine.
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That's just that's it just went hand in hand.
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So I, I learned to, you know, numb out or not deal with
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emotions or me being in the hospital for three months while
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my friends are at the beach. And I never felt like it was
7:21
just what I knew. But I learned how to cope with,
7:25
you know, dem roll, I guess. Yeah.
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And parents emotions too, you know, because your parents, you
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know, you I have such a loving family.
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My dad, you know, was so frustrated.
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So he kept saying, gosh, Christy, I promise this is going
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to be the last time you're going to have an operation.
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And I see his poor face and I'm like, God, I'm going to probably
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disappoint him again, you know, even though that's not what he's
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thinking. But that's that's how I felt.
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No, it probably broke his heart. I, I remember I was on the
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Advisory Board here in Saint Louis Children's Hospital and I,
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those weren't my kids, but gosh, we, we would take a walk through
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there once a month and just, you know, they would show us what
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all they were doing. And it was just, oh, I can't
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believe these kids at this age are having to deal with all this
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and what the parents have to deal with, you know, just the
8:10
struggle of somebody that you have unconditional love for.
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That's a youngster that's having to deal with all that, that you
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don't think of it a lot unless you you see it and it's it's for
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a parent. I can't imagine.
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Yeah, yeah, I'm sure it's hard. So your high school years,
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Christy, were they pretty normal like did were you just one of
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the kids and and? One of the kids, yeah.
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Yeah, just one of the kids. Every once in a while I'd have
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to go back in the hospital for three weeks or something like
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that. But I was smart.
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So I got good, good grades, made sure I got good grades.
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Like I was not allowed to get bad grades.
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So yeah, I was a regular kid. Went to the beach in the, you
8:59
know, in the morning and then drove up to the mountains and go
9:03
skiing at night and yeah. So how did you, how did it
9:09
progress for you 'cause I know that you said that there was an
9:11
addiction to opioids, which I could, it's a very
9:13
understandable going through all the different things that you
9:15
went through. Was that going on when and all
9:19
this happening as you were just growing up?
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Did you, did you realize or did you think about or was it just,
9:27
you know, that was just part of your routine of what you had to
9:30
get through to survive? Right it was part of it every,
9:34
you know, throughout the time I would think to myself, I really
9:37
don't need these pills. You know, I'm, I'm, I'm not in a
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lot of pain, but because I, I have so much, you know, everyone
9:47
will say how different my body was inside.
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So they would see me as a normal kid and they, so they would just
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give me a lot. Like I would leave the hospital
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with 200 Vicodin, you know, so, and then it's, and then when
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you're dealing with emotional things that you don't even
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realize that's emotional, you think, oh, I'm good, like I
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shouldn't feel this way. So let me just take a couple
10:10
Vicodin and I'll feel the way that I'm supposed to feel, which
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is, I don't even know what that was, but it just kind of allowed
10:18
me to continue to disconnect. So how did your life, how did
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your life progress after high school?
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What happened for you in that next step?
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Well, throughout high school, you know, because of my, and
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I've done a lot of, I've learned a lot about the process of being
10:36
disconnected and trauma and all of that, because when I went
10:39
into the prison, I thought, I said to my mom, this is the
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trauma hospital really is what it was.
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So I learned a lot about that. And so in high school, you know,
10:48
being, or really before high school, I would be in the
10:51
hospital and I'd have friends bring like some champagne
10:56
inside. You know, I'm, I don't know how
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old I was, 15 or 16 or something.
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So it was always that rebellion piece, you know, that was, but
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it was, you know, that's just kind of the way it was with me.
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So I realized I have this adventures in spirit.
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You know, I really didn't care for authority because they would
11:14
tell me all the things I couldn't do with, you know, the
11:18
body that I had or, you know, no thumb on one hand.
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But and you can't do this. And I would always say, well,
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now I'm going to do it. Now I'm going to try it because
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I, you know, they. Said I couldn't do it.
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Yeah, they couldn't. So I'm going to see if I could
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and and I always could. So, you know, I think all that
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together is a trajectory of going going in a in a wrong
11:39
direction, especially like I said, if you're not 100% like
11:43
present, you know, So, yeah, I went to high school and so I
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went to college and throughout the time I would go in the
11:51
hospital, come back out, take more pills, it would be just
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that trajectory. And I and I met a man who ended
11:58
up being a police officer. And one day I was driving to
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pick up my sister from the airport and I had taken too many
12:09
pills and her and his Sergeant pulled me over, not knowing it
12:16
was me. And so I was, I was so
12:18
embarrassed and I felt bad for him and, and at that point I was
12:22
like, OK, I didn't even need the pills, I just took them.
12:26
So I got to do something about it.
12:28
And then I learned about the whole first time about getting
12:32
being sober and. So that was the moment really
12:34
that happened that you were thinking I've got to do
12:36
something. This is right.
12:38
OK, Yeah. So that was the moment, yes.
12:42
And it was a wild moment of going into a rehab and you're it
12:47
was. So it was the first time that it
12:49
was like, you know, I remember I'm like, oh, you're like birds
12:53
chirping. This is a whole new way, yeah.
13:00
Chrissy, what like with your husband being a police officer,
13:03
was he supportive of all this 'cause I mean, he would have
13:06
known that you had all these medical conditions and all those
13:09
things that you were living through.
13:12
And then you deciding that you're going to get sober as a
13:16
marriage, 'cause I know that marriage ended, but was how?
13:21
How did that work? He was really supportive of me
13:27
getting sober, very much so. Like I took a year off of work,
13:31
you know, I had a lot of Guild like, you know, I remember that
13:34
he got me a massage and I was like, here I am getting massage
13:37
and not working for a year. I felt a lot of guilt and shame
13:40
around that. And but what was interesting as
13:46
as I became more, you know, clear and sober and not under
13:53
any influence, it was harder with us because I would think I
13:58
was eat more easily led by like I, I felt bad sometimes.
14:03
So I would just allow him to, you know, kind of run the show.
14:08
And then then now I'm like, I don't know how to do that or no,
14:12
that just that doesn't work with me.
14:13
And that's kind of, I think how it ended up unraveling.
14:18
So the, So you didn't, I think you're sober for what, 10 years?
14:22
Yeah, Yeah. And then so how does the how
14:25
does the relapse happen for you? Well, for me, it was a chain of
14:31
events that were extremely emotional that I didn't have the
14:35
tools to manage, which was my father getting sick and dying of
14:40
cancer, learning my husband was having an affair with someone
14:43
that he had pulled over. I was in the middle of a we were
14:47
in the middle of adoption at that point too.
14:50
So I, we and. We had a lot going on.
14:53
There was a lot that all fell and instead of saying, hey, I
14:57
need help or you know, hey, I need some emotional support, you
15:01
know, I went back in the hospital for a kidney thing and
15:05
the lady's like, oh, I'll get you a pain shot.
15:08
I'll be right back. And I remember, Dang, I know I
15:12
don't need it. I'm not in pain but damn I
15:15
really wanted some relief. Like emotional.
15:18
Relief. Yeah, and it makes me emotional
15:20
now thinking about that because I was like, Dang, because that's
15:23
what I knew for all my life. You know, yeah, growing up.
15:28
Yeah. And so I just said OK.
15:30
And I knew when she left, I said this is not good.
15:34
And so, yeah. And I, I still remember this
15:37
exact feeling of her giving it to me and knowing that I was
15:42
going to be in a different place.
15:43
And that's what happened. And I was at the time that I
15:47
went and I had been dating someone that I had known for a
15:51
while and he had relapsed on meth and I had never done that
15:55
before. And he had called me when I was
15:57
in the hospital. He said, Chris, you can you come
15:59
help me? I can't get out.
16:01
And I and I and and he was in Palm Springs.
16:05
OK. And so I said, yeah, I'll come
16:07
help you. And then I was like, and I
16:08
thought, you know, this is how crazy the addiction is.
16:11
I thought if I tried this, I will never get addicted to it
16:15
because I'm not that person. I'm not a drug addict like that.
16:19
I said, so if I try this and that'll probably cut the craving
16:23
for the opioids. So I and I didn't tell him
16:27
that's what I was doing. I picked him up, took him
16:31
somewhere safe and then I went back and I said let me try this.
16:34
And I did that and it got me. It's got a lot of people.
16:39
I, there's so many different stories on it.
16:42
I, there was a guy that I interviewed that was like he was
16:44
number 2 in the nation and, and golf as a teenager right behind
16:49
Tiger Woods. Big deal in Hawaii was well
16:51
known and he got one day, one day and it changed his whole
16:57
life. And it's, you know, it's, it's
16:59
crazy how that happens and all things seem normal and then
17:04
they're not. All things seem normal.
17:07
Yes. Yeah.
17:08
It just grabs you and I, you know, I would say like, you
17:12
know, certain certain products or certain things that make
17:16
someone addicted. It's like has you by the throat
17:19
and it won't let you go like it won't.
17:22
So Christy in your because I know that you had this styling
17:25
business in LA and you were kind of everything was going was, was
17:30
this all in that same time period where you had the
17:32
business and, and things are going well and you meet this guy
17:37
that that that's the boyfriend. And that's how long does all
17:41
that last? And then how do you get into
17:44
this crazy national story with the months?
17:48
It's you know what people don't realize?
17:51
It's also, it's just, it's very simple steps that get to that
17:57
point when you're never planning to go in that direction.
18:00
Yeah, they're like half steps. They'll just start down the
18:02
path, Yeah. Yeah, you start down these paths
18:05
of little stones, you know, I had my wardrobes styling
18:08
business I loved, I had great clients.
18:11
I shopped, I did their wardrobe. It was great.
18:14
I mean, that sounds like a really cool business to be in
18:16
LA. It was, I start, well, yeah,
18:18
'cause I used to work at Nordstrom and sell shoes.
18:20
And then all the women would be like, hey, Christine, we should
18:22
come to my house and show me what I can wear with these
18:25
shoes. And I was thinking, what do you
18:27
mean? But they would, I, I would hear
18:28
that all the time. So I just took their name and
18:30
number and then I quit Nordstrom and I called, I said, hey, I'm
18:35
ready, I'm available, let's go. And so I did that for a long
18:38
time. I love them.
18:39
So the fact that I was in the hospital then I did the math and
18:47
then I liked it. And then it was like, I remember
18:50
one time I went to work with, with, with the client who I
18:53
really loved and I wanted to, you know, I didn't want to do
18:56
any of that. I wanted to be present with her.
18:58
And, and it was so hard because I just felt this pull.
19:02
And so for me to leave that, then you have shame and guilt
19:06
and all that that goes with. Like you're feeling like you're
19:10
living two different lives. Two different lives.
19:13
And then you're so you feel so bad about yourself.
19:16
Like, what the hell are you doing, Christy?
19:18
Like you, you know, I said, Earl, I had a great family.
19:20
I have a great family. So why?
19:22
And my mom, you know, spent all this time making sure I was
19:25
alive. And I'm like, here I am killing
19:28
myself. It's like, it's so like you,
19:30
like you start thinking something must be wrong with me,
19:33
Like there must be a mental issue or something.
19:35
You don't realize that. Yeah.
19:38
The. The cycle of addiction.
19:41
I think it's really interesting too, 'cause you and I talked
19:43
about this on the phone a week or so ago when we were talking
19:45
about one of the statements you make is that when you judge
19:48
other people, you're really judging yourself on how you
19:50
feel. And, and I think that's so deep
19:52
because, you know, when people lash out at people, they're
19:55
feeling something themselves. So the guy, the boyfriend, the,
20:02
the, the selling of the drugs did.
20:05
Is that how that happened? Was he in that world?
20:07
And you kind of no. He was not in the world.
20:12
He, you know, was educated, great family from the Midwest.
20:16
And So what happened? Well, so I didn't tell him for a
20:20
little while, you know, that I had tried it.
20:22
When I did, he was so angry, like almost like snot crying.
20:26
He was like, Christy, you're the light.
20:28
Like, what did you do? And I was still like, you know,
20:32
it's no big deal. And he's like, no, it is a big
20:35
deal. And so after a little while, I,
20:39
he just, you know, I'm in his world and we're in Palm Springs
20:43
and somebody that, that he bought from said, Hey, you can
20:47
buy a little more and that way I'll charge you less and then
20:52
you can sell it. I have a guy here that wants and
20:54
you're like, OK, because you're not doing, I'm not doing my
20:56
business anymore. So you, that's the, you know,
20:59
that's the, that's. Just a little bit of money on
21:02
it, yeah. In Laguna Niguel.
21:04
And so that's how that starts. And then someone says, Hey, I
21:08
know a guy in Connecticut and he wants this much and, and, and
21:14
I'm, you know, it sounds silly, but I talk about so I get, so I
21:18
want people to kind of understand is that I'm an
21:20
entrepreneur at heart. And so when someone says, hey,
21:25
you know, you can buy this much and sell this much and, and
21:30
here's how and you're not working.
21:31
Here's what you do, you do it and it's done and it feels like
21:35
a transaction and you're not really even thinking what you're
21:39
doing. There was one point that I one,
21:41
one time that I reprimanded the guy, the Mexican mafia guy for
21:48
being late. And so he pulled me aside and he
21:52
said, Christy, let me tell you, with the amount of drugs that
21:54
are here in this house right now and the money, I'm never going
21:58
to tell you when I'm going to be here.
22:00
He he said people get killed all the time for this.
22:03
And when he said that, that sounds crazy.
22:05
That's the first time I was like, what am I?
22:08
Oh my God, Like I literally wanted to throw up.
22:11
Like I'm not selling shoes. I'm not doing a business.
22:14
You know this. Is something you could lose your
22:16
life for. This I'm I'm selling drugs like
22:20
it like yeah, that was a poignant moment.
22:23
Did that make me stop? No, but that where that's LED
22:27
more to deep shame and disgust and all of that.
22:32
So this, this fascinating piece of you having a this connection
22:35
with a priest. It was just some guy in
22:38
Connecticut. I don't know.
22:39
At the time we didn't know who he was.
22:42
You and you wouldn't probably. Yeah, and I've still never met
22:45
him in person. That is so wild.
22:48
So how does that all unravel? What happens?
22:54
It unravelled by. How does the nightmare begin?
22:57
Yeah, the nightmare began by somebody he was associated with
23:04
who got caught up in a sting. And So what what the feds do is
23:11
if you tell on somebody else, then you get less time.
23:14
So he told on the priest. Kevin was his name, and he
23:19
didn't tell on us, and the priest didn't tell on us either.
23:22
No one really told on anyone except that one guy told on
23:25
Kevin and they got us on wiretap and got him through.
23:32
I think it was undercover. So at the same moments across
23:35
the country, they got the priest and us and one other guy.
23:41
So when does it come down on you, Christy?
23:43
How does it happen guys? I think it was a no knock deal
23:46
that happened in. Yeah, it was in Las Vegas.
23:49
Las Vegas. There was a moment when we were
23:51
in San Clemente that there was something suspicious that we
23:55
thought that made. It's in my book, it's something
23:59
suspicious. And so we fled and fled, meaning
24:03
let's go to either Las Vegas or Palm Springs.
24:05
But you know, when you're living like the double life, we had to
24:08
take it to the Consumer Electronics Show in Las Vegas.
24:11
And we were. And so we thought, well, let's
24:12
just go there. And we went there.
24:16
And that's when the fence got us in the hotel room.
24:20
So I was like, wow, these maids are making so much noise.
24:23
But it wasn't the maids. What were your thoughts?
24:26
What was going through your mind when it happened?
24:28
It was I, I'm pretty certain that my body kind of shut down,
24:36
just overwhelming the overwhelming emotion of what was
24:42
happening. I ended up in the hospital for a
24:46
week when I got in and I don't really remember much of that
24:49
part. So yeah, it was, it was, it was
24:54
a lot. I just remember laying on face,
24:55
standing on the floor and they're yelling, where's the
24:58
guns? Where's the guns?
24:59
Which, you know, I've never had a gun.
25:00
I'm never used to guns. So either of us never had.
25:04
And yeah, we were just two people who got addicted.
25:09
And hey, if you buy more, you can sell more.
25:12
And and that's what it, that's what it was.
25:16
So Christy, how long does this I mean, and I'm, I'm assuming that
25:20
probably the way they took you down, they just didn't release
25:23
you. No, I never got released
25:26
actually. Yeah, they at one point in Las
25:30
Vegas, the judge had said that we could be released on our own
25:35
work cognizance, but the the magistrate from Connecticut,
25:40
because it was shipped through the mail to Connecticut, like it
25:46
was only like an hour before we were going to be be released.
25:49
He said no, I want them to come here.
25:52
So I lost everything my condo I had been in for.
25:56
I don't know, 18 years, everything because I couldn't
26:00
make payments from the prison for five years.
26:03
So how does this go down with your parents and the family and
26:07
did they know before? This.
26:08
Or did they have an idea? Or was it just a complete shock?
26:12
Complete shock. Yeah, yeah.
26:16
That was that's that, that's where it all also, you know,
26:21
just the just the horror of involving it, you know, the
26:25
people that love you the most. And this is terrible, is
26:28
terrible. Oh yeah, because it affects
26:31
everybody around you. Yeah, it's, it's, it's the most
26:35
disgusting, selfish thing anyone can do, I think.
26:42
But I mean, they understood that, you know, the part of the
26:47
addiction part, but still it's, it's, it's really bad.
26:50
I know when my sister said she was going to come to visit, I
26:52
was like, I don't want you here because they took me all the way
26:55
to Rhode Island. So I was pretty much as far away
26:58
as you can get from. All the way across the country.
27:00
Yeah, all the. Way yeah.
27:02
And they put you on con air in your shackles with the black box
27:05
around your waist and ankles and it's like.
27:08
And the whole time like, what am I doing here?
27:11
Like Christy. Like.
27:12
You almost feel like you're living somebody else's life.
27:16
Often, Yeah, yeah. I remember in Danbury in
27:20
Connecticut, it was snowing. It was a Blizzard.
27:24
And I and I remember walking through the compound part, it
27:28
would snow everywhere. And I was and all the shackles
27:32
and everything. I'm like, what?
27:34
This is just a trip. Yeah, this is like so I, I
27:37
remember having that same thing happen, Christine.
27:39
I was walking the fence of Leavenworth and I was thinking,
27:43
wow, this is really rock bottom. This is really bad.
27:46
I don't think it could get any worse unless I died.
27:49
But this is really, I'm walking against a fence that has two
27:52
barbed wire fences. And that's the place I'm living
27:55
for the next five years. And I, I just thought to myself,
27:58
at that time, holy wow, how did, how did all this happen?
28:02
And I'm, I'm here and my, our deal was a six year deal.
28:05
So it was like after this whole battle, I'm here.
28:08
I, I, it was my thought when I was in the bunk bed that night,
28:11
looking up at the penitentiary and thinking, after this whole
28:14
battle, here I am. I'm in the top bunk of a a bunk
28:18
bed at Leavenworth. Yep, same here.
28:21
That's what I was like. I'm in the top bunk in a maximum
28:23
security prison in Texas. What the heck?
28:27
OK, So before we get into that, I Christy, because I, that's, I
28:31
want to unpack all that because I mean, to me that's we got to
28:35
get got to go into this. I want to recognize the White
28:40
Collar Support group Nightmare Success podcast is sponsored by
28:43
the White Collar Support Group, the world's first support group
28:46
devoted to people navigating the white collar criminal justice
28:49
system. I'm a member of the white collar
28:51
Support Group and I can tell you that this is a bunch of people
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who help each other through the criminal justice journey for
28:58
free. Whether you're just starting
29:01
your journey or you've made it through to the other side, this
29:03
is a great space for you. You can join us on Zoom Monday,
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7:00 PM Eastern Time, 4:00 PM Pacific.
29:10
For information, go to prisonist.org.
29:13
That's prisonist.org. Start here.
29:15
OK, so you're, you're in, I think you said you were in
29:20
Danbury walking with these shackles on.
29:23
Kind of walk us through. Christy, what 'cause you went
29:26
through, what, five different prisons?
29:28
Yeah. Wow, that's like we, we were
29:31
talking before we got on. That's like one of the worst
29:33
things to happen in prison is to travel as a prisoner.
29:36
Yeah, yeah. Well, because you're you, you,
29:42
you almost don't have words the way that you feel, you like on
29:46
TV or in the movies, you know, with Nicolas Cage and they're on
29:50
con air, all the chains and the bad guys that are like, looking
29:54
like they're going to rip your face off.
29:56
And here I am, Yeah, right in the middle of it.
29:58
In your own movie. And yeah, in the whole movie.
30:02
And so yeah, if I like I said on my first round, I was in the was
30:07
blizzarding and and I still had on the clothes that they
30:10
arrested me with was leggings and A and a camouflage T-shirt
30:15
short sleeve. And, and the guys that, you
30:18
know, the Marshalls are in full gear, snow gear with just their
30:22
eyes showing and, and I didn't even have sleeves on and they
30:26
didn't care, you know, and you're standing outside, you
30:29
know, shaking and whatever. It's just like so the message
30:33
you continually get inside is that you don't matter in any
30:36
capacity. It's such a weird feeling too,
30:39
isn't it? That like what I I remember
30:41
going through when you get processed, you, you we talk
30:44
about this a lot on the show. It's like you're you can almost
30:46
feel your freedom coming off your skin, like you're shedding.
30:50
Yeah, Whatever that is, that that intangible thing that you
30:53
just feel in your mind is this is so different than anything
30:57
that I've ever experienced. Right, right.
31:00
And then when you lose everything and then you realize
31:04
all my belongings fit in this little locker.
31:07
It's a trip. It is because when you are
31:10
living a life, I don't know how old you were when you went in,
31:13
but to go 48, so I was, yeah, I was 47.
31:17
We were about the same age, Christy.
31:20
You have all these possessions and things, and your world gets
31:23
shrunk down to a locker, a plastic chair and a bunk bed.
31:27
Yeah. And it's kind of crazy because I
31:30
think one of the things about that is, is that as dark as that
31:35
is to feel that you also find this.
31:40
Well, there's two ways to go. One is you give up.
31:42
And the other is you survive you.
31:44
You learn that you can adapt. Yeah.
31:48
And that's interesting to find out about yourself because you
31:52
know, unless you're put into a situation where you, it's either
31:56
fight or flight, you, you don't know for sure until you you're
31:58
actually, you know, dealt the hand.
32:01
Right. When you walk in there, what's
32:04
what's, what's your reaction and, and with the people and all
32:09
that, was it what you had? Thought, you know, I first
32:16
walked into Las Vegas and I don't remember really a lot of
32:20
it. And then I was in Danbury for
32:24
just a little bit, only because the Rhode Island prison forgot
32:28
about me. And so they had to take me to
32:30
Rhode Island. And I was there for a few years
32:32
and it was just a room. No, outside they had like a
32:36
cinder block other room that had small windows at the very very
32:41
top, really high up. How long were you in there like
32:43
that? I was there for two years.
32:46
Oh wow. Jeez, right.
32:49
And so it was a, it was a. Did you not go outside?
32:52
No. Oh wow.
32:54
That's like jail. So that's why today I'm like, I
32:56
love being outside running free. I know before you got out of
32:59
here you went for a run in New Orleans with your new shoes.
33:01
Yeah. Yes, yeah.
33:03
So, you know, if you can't go outside for two years.
33:06
And like said, I'm a beach girl from Southern California.
33:10
So there's just one room. At that point, there was
33:12
probably 20 women. And you're all in this state of
33:17
flex. Like you have not been sentenced
33:19
yet. People are facing two years to
33:23
life and you don't really know what what your fate's going to
33:26
be. And so you're trying to be make,
33:28
you know, be a little normal, watching Ellen Plain Spades
33:34
cooking with, you know, bagged beans or whatever and trying.
33:39
I walked a lot. I tried to walk around a lot,
33:43
but that's the way it was for a couple years.
33:45
And so I, you know, that's an interesting place when you're in
33:50
with so much pain and uncertainty.
33:53
It's. Very.
33:53
And that's it's a very transient environment there.
33:56
Yeah, yeah, people in, people out.
33:58
And then when I got sentenced Oklahoma and then to Texas and
34:03
that is that was like, that's a real like fed prison.
34:06
And you know, it was, it was hard.
34:10
I was, you know, the one thing when I, when we went into the
34:15
holding cell and I remember and I, you know, as I said earlier,
34:19
I thought I was going to a camp in California and here I am on
34:22
the way to Texas and I was in this huge buzz.
34:24
Let's talk about that a little bit, Christy, because before we
34:27
got on, I asked you the question, how in the world did
34:29
you end up in the, the, the maximum security and you were
34:33
actually had already kind of geared yourself for going to a
34:37
camp. It's going to be close to home.
34:39
I can do this. And then it's exactly opposite.
34:44
You're going to Texas, you're going to a maximum security
34:47
facility. How did you?
34:51
What was going through your mind?
34:54
Well, what people don't realize is the judge, what he says or
34:58
she says it, that's only a recommendation.
35:00
Exactly. So the feds do whatever they
35:03
want. And I didn't know that.
35:04
I thought, I mean, of course, the first time involved in this,
35:07
most of the time you, you don't know anything.
35:10
You're just trying to scramble to make sense of what's going
35:13
on. But.
35:15
But yeah, so I was there because it was a Medical Center.
35:20
So, you know, so my mom's looking it up real quick online
35:23
to see what it was. And it's called Hospital of
35:26
Horrors. You know, Can you imagine mother
35:27
who's dealt, you know, spend so much time with me in the
35:30
hospital, I'm going to Hospital of Horrors without her, you
35:33
know, in prison, accident, security prison.
35:36
I mean, that's just horrific. And so, you know, it was like,
35:41
you know, like I had said before, it kind of was like a
35:43
trauma hospital. Women from all walks of life
35:47
looking exactly the same in their khaki uniform.
35:52
I remember there was a khaki dress and I told the girl I was
35:55
next to. I said, if you ever seen me in
35:57
that khaki dress as a wardrobe stylist, come get me something
36:01
drawn with me. I will never be in that dress,
36:02
right? Because you know, I don't know
36:04
if you know the way it looks. It's very like, you know, it's
36:08
just the ugliest and very, you know, tan.
36:13
It looks it's it's it's. Bad.
36:14
Well, there's no colors in prison either.
36:16
Yeah, the no colors. Everything's drab.
36:19
Like apron ish, you know, like Little House on the Prairie, you
36:22
know, gone, you know, I don't know what you call it, but
36:26
anyway. And one day she saw me in the
36:27
dress because it's hot in Texas. She's like what?
36:31
I said, don't say a word. It's hot.
36:34
But yeah, it's it was, it was it was hard.
36:37
And you don't want to cry. I remember two women started
36:41
singing this gospel song and I started bawling.
36:45
I'm like, what? And because it was like, you're
36:47
in this horrific place. You're holding to go inside,
36:51
everyone's kind of standing there trying to look at see who
36:53
the new girls are. And yeah.
36:57
And then these two women started to sing and gospel songs Take Me
37:00
to the King and I I never heard gospel before and who it was
37:06
like, how can I feel this little bit of peace in this horror?
37:11
So there was always that had both.
37:14
Often, you know, you have this peace and then you have this
37:16
pain and you're holding them both together at the same time
37:19
for a long time. How was your life inside there?
37:25
You know, I never got in fights. I kept my head down.
37:30
I worked landscaping. The hardest part was going
37:34
through the drug program. Our dad, our dad, we both did
37:37
that. For me, I was, I wanted to go.
37:39
I was excited to go to do some work on myself.
37:42
But everyone kept saying that they're like Christy, don't do
37:46
it here because no one graduates.
37:48
And I was like, I can do it and I'm not gonna do anything wrong
37:51
or have sex or do drugs or anything like that.
37:54
And I didn't. And but they ended up right
37:58
before I was supposed to go home, they ended up kicking me
38:03
out for and they said there was no clinical progress and their
38:06
inauthenticity, I was not authentic.
38:09
And there was two of us left out of 32 people.
38:13
And I wasn't going to quit. And a lot of women quit because
38:15
it was just, it was just the abuse really.
38:18
It wasn't really, you know. It can be cult like.
38:22
And, you know, I thought what I thought about it too, was there
38:25
was a couple of people that were good instructors and then the
38:29
rest of them were they would want to be Cos, you know, they
38:31
carried the keys and they set people back and they, you know,
38:35
created a, a horrific situation. But it's it's kind of cult like
38:42
and you you don't and. That and I was fine with that.
38:45
If you're going to be cult, be cold because I'm out.
38:47
Like, you can be any way I expected it to be, but it was
38:51
it. It was very like the way they
38:54
treated the women that didn't have the same support that I
38:57
did. I got angry.
38:58
Like, how could you be so mean to this, this girl who's trying
39:02
to open up about her abusive author, right?
39:05
And so like a good example of that, when they kicked me out, I
39:10
mean, I was devastated. Well, cause a lot of it wasn't.
39:13
You can't have free expression in there.
39:15
So I mean, if it's not along the lines of the workbook, well, I
39:19
didn't. Even like that, it was just the
39:23
IT like for instance, when when they kicked me out, she brought
39:26
me to her office. This is the lady in charge of it
39:29
all. And she said, and she knew my
39:31
biggest, my biggest hard point was the fact that I couldn't
39:36
have children. I wanted to have children so
39:39
bad. And she said to me, thank God
39:41
you couldn't have children, Christy.
39:43
You would have been a terrible mother.
39:46
Like what? What woman?
39:48
Oh. It's a monster.
39:49
What any woman would say that to another woman.
39:51
I've never met anyone like that. And she's in charge of all of
39:54
this. And she said, I bet you're a
39:56
terrible sister and I bet you're a terrible daughter.
39:59
Now get out of my office. And then I do another year so.
40:04
I yeah, 'cause you, you lost your year, right?
40:06
Yeah. Oh gosh, I can't imagine.
40:08
And so I literally at that point was the only time in my life I
40:12
thought something must be wrong with me.
40:15
Like it's probably better if I'm not on this planet because I
40:18
couldn't imagine really any woman saying that to somebody
40:22
like that would. Yeah, after you bared and tried,
40:25
bared your soul and tried to make sense, you know, of it.
40:28
And and you really, I wanted to tell people this to you can't do
40:32
personal work when you're in fight or flight mode.
40:34
And for survival mode, it's not a safe place to feel safe to do
40:39
work. So we tried to do it anyway.
40:41
And then they yanked that and push that and pull that and then
40:44
say it's a good thing you couldn't have kids.
40:46
You would have been a terrible mother.
40:48
I mean, we don't talk about that enough.
40:51
And and that's, and it's not the fact that, oh, you don't want to
40:54
do this or it's a call. It's no, it's abusive and
40:58
horrific. And I, I really would be
41:00
surprised if, you know, wouldn't be surprised if some of the
41:04
women that I was in there with are not even on this planet
41:06
anymore. So I did it the end of the year.
41:11
But one thing my landscape boss was so nice.
41:14
He never spoke. He was very good looking.
41:16
So I know he never talked a lot because, you know, he didn't
41:19
want anything with the girls. And so I was devastated.
41:22
And I said I, I, I can't believe I got kicked out.
41:25
And he said lash over. He said, I don't think they met
41:27
anyone like you before here. And that, oh, that was the one
41:31
little seed, the hope. And he said, do your work, run
41:36
around the track, put your head down and get out.
41:40
And just those words that and that was the most he ever said
41:44
to me in the whole 2 years. I said OK, but there was one
41:48
this little tiny bit of hope that I wasn't defective or
41:55
horribly flawed. One of the guys on the show here
41:59
early on three seasons ago was saying don't ever take away
42:03
someone's hope, because hope might be all they have.
42:07
Yes, absolutely. So you do put your head down.
42:11
Start just doing your thing. Do you start when you get close
42:17
to the door? Christy, what are you starting
42:20
to think about? What you're going to think and
42:23
do on life on the outside. Well, I decided to relocate to
42:30
Oregon because Chad, who I had gone to prison with, got out
42:35
before me because he, the art app that he was involved in was
42:39
a much more healthy art app. So he did well, but he got out
42:42
first and he relapsed. And so I thought, OK, I, I, I
42:49
can't be around that. And so I went to Oregon where my
42:52
mom and my sister were. And so I was very sad to go
42:55
there in regard to, I thought I wanted to go home.
42:59
I didn't want to be in Medford OR or Ashland, OR, but I knew
43:04
that's where I had to go. And so I did.
43:06
And it was, it was, it was, it was hard.
43:12
It was really hard as someone who got out of prison and you
43:15
know, you have all the shame and this guilt and you want to make
43:18
up for it. But you, I lost everything.
43:21
You know, I always sound like I'm AI was a wardrobe stylist
43:24
who had to get a pair of jeans from a homeless girl in the
43:28
halfway house. But I was also, like you
43:31
mentioned, you know, it was the first time I had nothing.
43:37
So which is freedom in certain aspects and so.
43:42
Yeah, rock bottom can be the end of the new beginning.
43:46
It was for me. It was for me totally.
43:48
And so the whole, you know, I just did a lot of work on
43:50
myself. I became really involved in like
43:55
making sure I have a spiritual connection, which I, you know, I
44:01
always say like for me like God's like the best Christie,
44:04
the highest Christie that makes the best decisions and the most
44:07
loving kind. That's all one inside my body.
44:10
And that's that's where I move around the world with.
44:15
Which just helps. Me be successful, yeah.
44:20
So where does it go from there? Because I know Christy, you're,
44:23
you've become kind of, you know, you've not wasted any time once
44:29
you got out and, and, and become an advocate and doing things
44:34
using your own experience, what you've gone through to help
44:36
others. How?
44:37
How did that all evolve? Well, I had a re entry court
44:42
judge when I went to the halfway house, the the man there said,
44:46
Hey, I think you would be first of all, he said, Gosh, I'm glad
44:50
to meet you because when I read your paperwork, I was angry that
44:54
I had Someone Like You coming here because I thought it would
44:57
be you were going to be very hard person to to have here.
45:02
It's which is, you know what they write on the pre sentencing
45:06
report and stuff and. Those pre sentencing reports are
45:10
do they just make I, I always, they're like you look at that
45:13
and like, Oh my God, I, I hope to God that's not me 'cause they
45:17
make everybody into a complete monster.
45:20
They do, yes. And so he so he said, you know,
45:24
we have a reentry court you can go and you can get a year off
45:27
and immediate like I'm like, yeah, I've heard that before.
45:30
I'm not falling for that shit again.
45:32
But so I went and it was a monthly meeting with those that
45:39
have been out of prison. And then you go, there's a
45:43
judge, a few judges at times, probation officers, police
45:48
officers, counselors, all the those that have been out.
45:51
And you go around the a table and you just talk about what
45:55
your week's been like or what your month has been like.
45:57
And she said, what do you need? And so this is federal, federal
46:00
Judge Ann Aiken. And she's my mentor.
46:04
And you know, she, she's now calls me her dear friend.
46:07
We travel together, spend the night at her house.
46:10
She's she's, she's the one that said to me, Christy, why aren't
46:14
you in school? And.
46:16
I was like, you know, I'm getting older.
46:17
I don't know exactly what I want to do.
46:19
I knew I was smart. I knew I could do anything.
46:21
But, you know, I wasn't sure she was OK.
46:24
Well, next month before you come here, I need you in school.
46:28
So that gave gave me the push. You know, I always say that like
46:32
I was at the Community College door and I was, and I was kind
46:35
of afraid to open it. And I was thought, Christy, look
46:39
at the people that you lived with in prison.
46:41
You were in a maximum security prison.
46:43
You can open the door to a Community College.
46:46
And I did. And I graduated with straight As
46:50
and I wasn't going to tell anybody where I was.
46:53
That was my intention to just start a new life.
46:56
But I realized little by little, the responses that I got and by
47:01
being in reentry court talking about my experience, kind of
47:07
made Shane go away and let the power really in to own own who I
47:12
am and my story. And so I was able to help
47:14
students, you know, as an older woman, you know, in college, and
47:19
they would cry and don't want to ask for help.
47:21
And I said, what do you need here?
47:22
I'll ask for help. And so I got to, you know,
47:25
encourage in that way. And so I realized me telling my
47:28
story because I used to not, I mean, I was private.
47:31
I didn't tell anyone about anything.
47:33
I had all these medical issues nobody knew about really.
47:35
I just, but I have now become the person that kind of goes
47:39
first in transparency because everyone already knows
47:43
everything if they want to look it up.
47:45
And, and then, and the shame kept falling away, you know, so
47:49
it's like, and so it's most important to me to be
47:52
transparent to Percy. Don't you think some of that is
47:59
too 'cause I mean, I think there's two, there's people
48:02
struggle with that when they get out of prison, you know, like,
48:05
what do I do with this? Like, how do I, how do I handle
48:08
this? Because it's, it's not something
48:10
people, you know, you're just not at a cocktail party and say,
48:13
hey, by the way, I was at Leavenworth.
48:14
What do you think of that? That's a good way to end a
48:16
conversation. But there's there.
48:17
But I think that what I found for me personally is by me
48:24
leading with that in some form or fashion, it takes the power
48:28
back from them to use it against me that it's mine.
48:32
It's who I am. It's what I know and I'm living
48:36
it. And, and I'm, I did go to
48:39
prison. I'm not, I'm a change person
48:42
because I went to prison. I didn't lose myself in prison.
48:46
I, I, I know I didn't become prison, Brent.
48:48
I still was Brent, still set my goals, still try to accomplish
48:51
things, still try to get things done.
48:52
But the idea of trying to hide that when I got out, it was too
48:57
much. So I mean, obviously I've gone
49:00
all the way the other direction with writing a book and doing a
49:02
podcast, but it's there's something empowering about being
49:07
able to lead with your own story so that no one else can use it
49:12
in a way that they're using it against you.
49:14
I mean, there's haters out there, but there's some there's
49:18
something about that feels like you're grabbing your power back.
49:21
Yeah, it's true. And I think it's necessary to
49:25
like, in order to do that, you have to.
49:29
And that's kind of why I wrote the book.
49:30
You have to really like, love yourself.
49:33
You have to give yourself a wide breadth of grace and own your
49:39
mistakes, own who you are, own your perceived dark side and
49:44
your light side and know that everyone else has them.
49:47
And once you do that and you're connected, like I said, if
49:51
you're connected some in some kind of spiritual something
49:55
that's bigger than you in the world, there's, you know, I
49:57
would say like the moon, you know, pulls the whole ocean.
50:00
There's something bigger than you in the world, whatever that
50:02
is for you. And so if I'm connected to
50:05
spirit in that kind of higher frequency, if, if I if I lead
50:11
with that, and I know that at the depths of my being in the
50:14
quietness of my house, then I can go out on the world.
50:18
And and like you said, lead with the story.
50:21
All the last night I was out with some new people and there
50:25
was a judge and she was sitting next to me and I was like, and
50:28
she said, so how'd you come from a wardrobe stylist today helping
50:32
women in prison? And it's just so is that like,
50:34
Dang, you know, I don't want to lie.
50:37
I don't know. So I said, wow.
50:39
I said, well, yeah, I, I became addicted and I went to prison
50:42
myself. And most of the time the
50:44
reaction is is oh, wow, interesting.
50:47
Because I try to, I try to have at least a little bit of time
50:51
with trust. And so they sure.
50:54
But last night didn't go as well.
50:57
It's she's just like what? You know, for distribution, she
51:00
goes, I would have given you 33 years in Mississippi.
51:04
And I was like, so then a little bit of that kind of comes in and
51:09
but I'm like, yeah. But then it goes away.
51:12
And then you have to remember who you are, what you do.
51:15
So you always have to come back to yourself.
51:17
You know, I think that's the important piece.
51:20
Yeah. And I think too, that the a lot
51:23
of times when people say something like that, I don't
51:25
think they've really contemplated the whole story to
51:29
to feel what all that is and how, you know, it's usually
51:33
somebody that's that's coming at it with a, an opinion that maybe
51:39
hasn't been all fleshed out. Definitely not.
51:42
How can it be in 20 seconds and I'm?
51:45
Not going to. Correct them, you know, and, and
51:47
you know, if they're judging me, I'm sure they're, they have a
51:50
lot of stuff that they're hiding.
51:51
Oh, yeah. And I that's, I love the name of
51:54
your book. It's perfectly flawed because I
51:58
mean, I don't know how you came up with that name, but it's
52:01
just, it says so much because perfectly flawed, everybody has
52:05
flaws perfectly to you, you're, you are who you are and how you
52:11
deal with your flaws is what makes you you and how you can
52:15
help people through your own flaws.
52:17
And I, I think it's a really nice title.
52:20
Thank you. Thank you.
52:22
So when you come out with that book, because I know you know,
52:25
you also founded the freedom of exchange project.
52:29
Did that all just kind of flow for you Lynn or, or with with
52:34
Christy with you getting more and more comfortable?
52:37
Was that just a natural progression of this is what I'm
52:40
going to do with this, This is how I'm going to handle this.
52:42
This is how I'm going to help people.
52:45
Well, I'm someone that kind of jumps into things, you know,
52:49
like, let's let's go, let's see what happens and how it works.
52:52
And so the freedom exchange really was birth.
52:55
It was a podcast that I had done that work and it try to do to do
52:59
it again now that I moved and my Co host moved to Washington.
53:02
But it was birthed out of a desire for people that have
53:08
never been in prison or don't know anyone or don't know what
53:11
it's about or think they know what it's about to meet people
53:15
that have gone through it. And so I love when people that I
53:19
know meet Artie, who, you know, was a juvenile lifer and was
53:24
eight years in solitary. And we talked to them about him
53:28
as a child and all the things that he said and the trajectory,
53:32
the way he spelled out the trajectory there, you know,
53:35
anyone goes, I can see that, you know, anyone that that that has,
53:40
you know, any kind of emotion. Like that's how I wanted them to
53:43
connect with all these people that I met.
53:45
And so that's how that started. And then I wrote a book like a
53:49
full like 80,000 word book, but I wanted to get it additionally
53:54
published. And I they send me a bunch of
53:57
followers and more e-mail lists, thousands and stuff.
54:01
And so I decided to write this other book that was more like a
54:04
workbook so that I could help free the men.
54:07
Men even those that have never been in prison.
54:09
Because you know, like I said before that everyone always has
54:13
some kind of mental prison. And you know, at first it starts
54:17
there before you even go to prison, I think.
54:19
And then, you know, really going back to freeing someone by
54:23
looking at their own life, you know, writing it out different,
54:28
you know, answering different questions.
54:29
So I asked the reader questions each chapter and room to write
54:32
so that you can really just discover yourself and love
54:35
yourself. And I and I, I think it's so
54:37
fascinating. I said to the girl the other
54:40
day, she was, she goes, oh, I would never write.
54:43
I don't want to know all that about myself.
54:44
I'm like, we walk around with yourself.
54:46
Everywhere. It's all in there.
54:48
Yeah, yeah, it's all in there and it's coming out some way,
54:52
you know, So why not control the way it comes out in a healthy,
54:56
loving way? If you love yourself, then
54:57
you're going to love others, you know, And then when you really
55:00
deeply go into and not, not the spiritual guru just right.
55:05
And, you know, just discover things about yourself, then you
55:09
really like. I expect people to be certain
55:12
ways. I expect people to disappoint
55:15
me. I expect people to act certain
55:17
ways because we're like, there's a part of me kind of in
55:21
everybody once you look at all your parts.
55:23
Sure. And then you just expect people
55:25
to be them. And you get to decide if you
55:28
want to interact with them or not instead of, you know,
55:30
instead of saying having a judgement about somebody.
55:34
And that's freedom, Yeah. Yeah, and I think that the, the
55:38
part of that, I think the big part of people understand each
55:41
other is just communicate, you know, to be able to talk and
55:44
understand each other. You know, and I that that's what
55:47
I fear right now in our society is we have less and less of
55:50
that, you know, people, you know, choose their corner and
55:52
stay there and they don't hear other opinions and, and what's
55:55
going on and, and and. Yeah, but I, I.
55:57
I really strongly believe it's because they don't even know
56:01
fully who they are. True.
56:03
So they just jump on the bandwagon, find ways to
56:07
continually reinforce their belief and then stay there.
56:12
But once they look at parts of them, seven, really look at
56:16
their history and who they are, then then I think that will just
56:19
kind of fall away. I agree on the dealing with the
56:24
universities with the the box, you know, there's always a box.
56:29
There's the box for, you know, trying to live somewhere.
56:31
There's a box for the your job, and then there's this box for
56:35
trying to get yourself an education about your criminal
56:37
history. What all is involved in that
56:42
Christian? What you're working on?
56:45
Well, in Oregon I was on Twitter for an assignment and somebody
56:51
sent me a private DM and said, hey, I see we're incarcerated
56:55
and you're a scholar. I passed the law and ban the box
56:59
in Washington and wanted to know if you wanted to do it in
57:03
Oregon. It's a great feeling to do that.
57:06
And I said, OK, let's do that. And I had no idea what that
57:08
meant. And I worked on that for a
57:12
couple years. So now in Oregon, there's no box
57:14
on either public or I had applications.
57:17
So the. People.
57:19
Yeah, it is huge because you know, 60% of the people who have
57:23
been a car server that come to that box stop filling out the
57:26
application because of shame and guilt.
57:29
And you know, how, how do you talk about your experience?
57:33
Because they said explain in like this tiny little square
57:36
that's less, you know, an inch wide, 3 inches long.
57:39
I mean, how do you explain that? And so, and we know that
57:43
education if, you know, the recidivism rate is so high.
57:48
And now if you get just an associates, it goes down to 14%
57:52
recidivism, 6% for a bachelor's, not even 1% for a master.
57:57
So that's that's the. Statistics.
58:01
It's. Huge, yeah.
58:03
That's, that's I'm, I'm love the fact that Someone Like You is,
58:07
is advocating that because it's one thing to take it on.
58:11
It's one thing to have experienced what you've
58:13
experienced and you bring that to the table and you're a voice
58:15
at the table that can be heard and and that's when impact
58:19
happens, I think. Yeah.
58:21
Mm hmm. So thank you, Christy, What's
58:25
next for you? Wow, boy, you know it it to live
58:34
this new way, which is not as much stuff to get in your car
58:40
from Oregon and pack whatever is your belongings, and you drive
58:45
to New Orleans. Yeah, you don't know one person,
58:50
but you have a job. I help women coming out of
58:52
prison, you know, get. How long have you been in New
58:55
Orleans? I forgot to ask you that.
58:57
I've been here. It'll be two years in July.
59:01
Yeah, OK. And I love it.
59:03
I mean, talk about the opposite of no distractions.
59:06
Oh my gosh, coming from Oregon to New Orleans.
59:10
It's it's wild, but I'm so grateful.
59:14
So yeah, you know, I really I, I, I have so much open that I
59:21
uncertainty for what's next. You know, I, I have my book, I'd
59:26
like to write another book. I, I speak in at E universities.
59:31
I love to speak at churches and universities and women's.
59:34
Leadership. Groups it's, it's really fun
59:37
because like I said, I'm taught like even the women leadership
59:40
groups, I'm talking to my old self.
59:41
So I, I know, I know all the things to say and, and I love
59:46
freeing women. I love, I love being the
59:49
courager, especially, like I said, because you know, I've
59:52
given everything I need to myself.
59:54
So now I just get to love people.
59:57
Well, there's so much that comes back from that.
59:59
I mean, there's just, there's just a.
1:00:01
Ton that comes back from it, it really fills you up.
1:00:03
I, I I I feel the same way. Yeah, I bet.
1:00:08
Christy, I mean, you've, you've gone through so much.
1:00:12
I, I always ask this question for people, you know, for the
1:00:15
listeners, like what, what do you think's your greatest take
1:00:17
away through all this that you've been through?
1:00:25
That you have to be your own best friend.
1:00:27
You have to love yourself like you get to.
1:00:31
And we all have dark, dark side, perceived dark sides and light
1:00:36
sides. And if you can, you know, put a
1:00:39
little spotlight in your perceived darks, dark sides of
1:00:43
things that you don't want anyone to know that other people
1:00:45
have to, but no one talks about it.
1:00:47
Write it out, bring it out into the light and just own that
1:00:52
shit. Then you then that's freedom.
1:00:55
And then you get to have the life that you were born to have.
1:00:59
You know, I never would have thought I would have been in New
1:01:01
Orleans. I, I mean, I have a whole
1:01:03
family. I have lots of people and
1:01:05
different states, but here I am. And now they're all coming here
1:01:07
to visit me and to meet new people, you know, and so I get
1:01:11
to be a light like when Chad had said, Chrissy, what, what are
1:01:15
you doing this? You're the light.
1:01:16
And now, but I get to be the light here with women that, that
1:01:20
have never experienced incarceration.
1:01:23
And so I'm, I'm hoping to, and I really kind of give women
1:01:29
permission to love themselves and to choose themselves.
1:01:34
We're great at that. That's my, I think my, my
1:01:38
biggest accomplishment. I love that, I love that and
1:01:41
especially everything that you've been through.
1:01:43
So I mean, you can really be that and that's.
1:01:46
That's freedom. I love it.
1:01:48
I love it. Freedom.
1:01:51
So Chrissy, what's the best way if somebody were and obviously
1:01:53
you can go to your website and your and your book is there,
1:01:58
which is perfectly flawed. Yeah, I have a picture right
1:02:02
here. A bit perfectly flawed.
1:02:05
There it is there she is there she is go to Amazon, go get it.
1:02:12
I'm going to be getting it so I'll.
1:02:17
Send you a copy. No, I'll get it.
1:02:19
I'll us book us. Us authors need people to buy
1:02:23
our books. Yeah, we'd see.
1:02:25
You so and for I want to give a shout out to Homestead financial
1:02:32
for always letting me use this podcast room.
1:02:34
It's so nice. If you need any home mortgage
1:02:36
needs, it's Greg aft EF he's your man loving, you know, all
1:02:42
the stuff the likes that follows the subscriptions.
1:02:46
Leave a review on Apple if you've got time, because it's it
1:02:49
just puts the show on steroids. I love it when you guys do that.
1:02:53
Go to brentcassidy.com. I spell it wrong.
1:02:55
It's with ATY, not Ady. And as I used to say to my
1:02:59
people when I was writing back and forth from Leavenworth, stay
1:03:02
strong. I'll do the same.
1:03:05
Christy, thanks so much for sharing your story today.
1:03:07
I think it's going to help a lot of people out there keep doing
1:03:11
what you're doing. I will, and you too.
1:03:15
I'm your success in and out.