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Navigating Chaos: Finding Peace and Purpose in the Storm · Eye Opener Society

• 0:00
  Hey, everyone. It's Gary here from Eye Opener Society alongside my wonderful
• 0:05
  partner, Jennifer Miller.
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  And thank you for joining us.
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  Thanks for having me. Yeah, for sure.
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  Jennifer, it's wonderful to have you back. It's wonderful to sit down here and
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  record an episode together because I know it's been a while with all this struggles
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  and everything else that I've been dealing with in my life.
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  And it's been so hard to get an episode out and
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  now i'm recording no longer in my studio that
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  i've been so comfortable in however i
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  will say in this little apartment the acoustics
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  are perfect so as a podcaster i just can't you know thank that you know the
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  apartment enough for that perfect acoustics um but that's the reason you got
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  the apartment right more than likely yeah i said As soon as I walk in,
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  I put on my podcast voice.
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  I'm like, welcome to the Eye Opener Society. And that's what made me decide.
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  Yeah, I mean, I would love for it to be that way. No, but it was just a stroke of luck.
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  The little bit of luck I had that this apartment was available and I was able to get it so fast.
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  But hey, another bright side is the fact that it does have good acoustics.
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  So I'm glad. I'm sitting here listening to myself in the headset and I'm saying,
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  wow, the acoustics really are good.
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  So here's the thing i mean yeah so we've
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  been talking a lot you and i and i mean
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  it's great because we got a great connection together and i really appreciate
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  that so much uh but i know it's been a while since we've been on the air and
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  had a regular episode one day yeah that's right yeah and that's longer than
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  i normally go um like i said every monday we try to have episodes out,
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  But we also have our live talk show that's going to be coming up in February.
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  And that's something I know. Yeah, I'm hoping that works out good,
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  too, because it's going to be a lot of fun. I'm looking forward to that.
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  But this episode, because of all the trauma and chaos and strokes of bad luck
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  that I've been having, I also spoke to you and I always pick up little things from you.
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  And you, on most occasions, are always trying to say, I'm figuring my life out.
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  And I feel that from you. And that's good.
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  Because we all do. we all need to figure things out
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  at times whether it's our entire life or
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  just figuring out the next hour it doesn't matter sometimes
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  we need to figure that out yeah i don't i
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  don't think i'm trying to figure everything out like
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  all at once is a good thing i think you know maybe taking
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  some like time like 15 20 minutes like
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  a week and say hey like where do i want to
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  be next week like take little bits
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  like you know baby steps i know people like make all these
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  really big plans and then they find
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  themselves like really disappointed and really upset because
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  their expectations weren't met and i think sometimes maybe lowering those expectations
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  can help avoid getting like angry about things but honestly like me i'm i'm
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  like a one week at a time type person like i have this planned out to do and
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  if i get that done great if i don't um well that's next week.
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  Adventure you know um but trying
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  to figure stuff out is i think you know
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  it's beneficial to just have like somewhat of
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  a small plan for yourself if you don't have that i don't i think that you can
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  feel very lost and very angry and have things pile up on you real quick i mean
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  i know for myself that's that's my personal experience and we all go through
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  these personal experiences and i think people out there in the audience too.
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  You're probably sitting and thinking, yeah, I got to figure out my life or my
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  life has been a disaster so far.
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  Maybe I need to take another direction, no matter what it is.
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  Because even me, it's like I've gone through so much in a short period of time.
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  And normally I'm pretty good with the sitting back, relaxing,
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  meditating, and it passes.
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  But when you get so much all at once, it builds up so much emotion.
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  So even I needed to step back and I had to make phone calls and say,
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  I need help, you know, and there's nothing wrong with that.
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  Um, but that's also to help me figure out my life. Where am I going? What am I doing?
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  I am a strictly live in the moment kind of person, but at the same time,
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  there needs to be plans for the future. I have plans for this podcast.
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  Um, one of the big things is canceling the podcast and switching over,
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  like I said, to a online meditative, um, spiritual kind of church, basically, um, um,
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  It's something I wanted to do. I almost did when I had third eye meditation.
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  I was really thinking about opening my own church.
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  I was going to purchase a building and make it a church, but there was so much
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  involved in that, especially on the nonprofit side.
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  But where I intend to go in the next couple of years, where I'm going to move
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  to, it's going to be surrounded by nature and there will be no escaping the nature.
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  It's going to give me a nice base to
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  sit and do the things I want to do and as
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  long as I got that internet connection I could bring people into
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  that space no matter where you are this way
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  it should help others to relax and calm and I could use my voice to bring you
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  into you know that calming state uh sort of guided meditations and oh I got
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  so many ideas so many uh but I can't do that if I don't figure out my life right now,
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  if I don't pick up the little pieces that had broken in the past few months and all.
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  So establishing ourselves again, it's not a bad thing.
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  And I know when you and I talk, you know, you present some problems you have,
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  I'll tell you problems I have.
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  And I, I take all of that in and I said, you know what, but we're still here.
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  You know, I still was able to flip on the switch for zoom. And there you are here.
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  I am. We're still here, you know, And regardless of what's going on,
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  we're in the spot that we're in. We're in the present moment.
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  So I'm going to ask you a question. When you move to your area and you go out
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  into the woods, are you going to document everything?
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  Are you going to document just from the beginning what it looked like,
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  bare bones, nothing, and then to where you are?
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  At that time and then just keep documenting until you
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  get to where you like feel like it's a hundred percent like pristine
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  or are you just gonna like hey this
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  is it you know well it's
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  a little difficult because it's not all mine there's other people involved with
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  it um so i had
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  taken some pictures of the property as it stands in its
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  natural state i know i got a few of those and
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  we don't know yet like i said it's all the people that are involved um
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  but my space my place yeah
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  i mean i i'm one oh i always take pictures anyway i
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  love doing that i love the photography and especially
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  where i'm going i can't wait
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  to go back and take even more photographs and all so
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  yeah that's definitely one idea um it'll take
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  some time you know to get it all together but it's going
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  to be life you know
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  i think life as it should be without all
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  the distractions from the traffic and people and
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  malls and television and all that stuff that gets so distracting it's going
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  to go back more to basics and that's what i'm looking for as long as i got an
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  internet connection because the only reason for that is i want to bring my sense
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  of peace out to others You said back to basics I have a homesteading book.
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  Called back to basics By readers digest I'm going to have to find a copy And
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  send it to you Just for your special move That would be awesome Back to basics
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  There's a lot of stuff you can learn from that,
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  I do like your vision on that Sounds very Um.
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  Just it sounds like a good vision like a good goal like a point for yourself to just reach for,
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  i think that a lot of people need those types
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  of things in their lives like you know i have a goal that i'd like to
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  meet next year and you know
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  work towards it or you know in the next five
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  years reach towards that i don't know if five years
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  is a good standoff point i know like during job
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  interviews you're like where do you see yourself in the
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  next five years and i'm always thinking well hopefully
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  not in this job hopefully i've moved on but you
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  don't want to say that because it sounds bad but you
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  know maybe a year or two you know put goals for that amount of length you know
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  that might be a more reasonable thing to reach right and it gives you that sense
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  of accomplishment because you're making the smaller steps rather than the large
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  ones and i think it's the thing.
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  It's like I look back and I say, oh, I've accomplished a lot.
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  In the last two years, even, I've succeeded in doing the things I wanted to
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  do for myself physically and mentally. And I've placed myself there.
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  So I say, this is great. I've done all those things. So what's the next step?
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  All I want at this point is to bring a sense of peace to myself and to my wife
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  where there's way less to worry about.
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  I want to worry about the things that like, oh, how long is this house going to take to get built?
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  Where can I explore next on this property? Can I make my own clothes? Things like that.
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  Those are the only worries that I want out of my life once I'm there, once I achieve that.
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  So there's a little bit of trials and tribulations that are going to lead up to it for sure.
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  But once they're done, at least I know what the next step is.
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  Honestly, I think that's really like I mean, it's awesome I think you're actually
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  on the right track for that though like from just talking to you and like things
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  clearing up from everything that you've been going through and To where you're at now.
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  I think I can honestly see that being Parts of the steps like your tribulations,
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  you know, um, and I think that's a really good idea Where do I see myself here
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  in the future? I don't know.
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  I'm still just trying to work through things, you know, um within myself because,
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  there's a lot of stuff going on up there um but um i think short-term goals
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  i think my garden is something i've been focusing on my for myself i mean because
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  i do the homesteading thing.
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  And uh yeah it's it's not going very well but it's it's in the process sometimes
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  those things that don't go too well are usually the most fun because even with each failure.
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  You trying to achieve something just lets you learn something new and it places
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  your mindset in a whole different place where you can really focus in now and
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  make it a determination.
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  And I get it. Yeah, things fail, but sometimes those failures are good things
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  that are failing. They're not bad things that are failing.
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  You don't want a bad situation to get worse. but
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  a garden hey if you fail that's not
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  a problem i always said if i was doing a garden the
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  first thing i would do if nothing's grown except weeds then
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  i have a weed garden you might
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  want to be careful how you word that i have
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  a weed garden it is what
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  it is um actually
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  i've been gardening for a very long time i have
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  three gardens um it's more along the lines
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  of i need to get off my butt and get paper and draw
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  out where i'm putting everything because there's certain
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  uh you know like tomatoes have to be
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  near certain things that they can't be near others i mean it's just that's where
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  i'm stuck at it's just trying to get the paper down and get all uh you know
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  inventory of like all my seeds and just figure out where i'm placing everything
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  at and if i'm going to be building more arbors or stuff like that.
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  It's more of like the winter weather, hermit, you know, hibernation,
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  laziness has gripped onto me and I just...
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  Just enjoying the relaxation and not trying to figure everything out.
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  But yeah, I mean, I'll get there.
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  Hopefully not the week before I start planting, but I'll get there.
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  Right. It's always about the journey. Yeah.
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  Yeah. We all have that journey. And it's good. It's focused. It's good for the mind.
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  Normally, me, especially me
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  with the winter too and the seasonal depression, I haven't gotten it yet.
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  Mainly because i think in the last three months i
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  don't have time for that you know i think all the
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  emotional outbreaks was enough to satisfy the
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  seasonal depression and it completely canceled it out and so
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  that's a good way to think about it because so like do
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  i need to tell your wife you know hey do some crazy stuff next year
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  when the season starts changing like just just
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  do something yeah it might help him it might
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  i listen yeah it might
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  because it really i haven't even thought about the seasonal depression
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  and a while back just before the winter hit um
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  hannah and i we did this uh episode called seasonal
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  happiness because it was just a
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  change a change of thinking don't think seasonal depression think
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  seasonal happiness while it wasn't really happiness that
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  i've been experiencing um you could
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  still say it was an adventure i you know these it was just stroke
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  a bad look on everything i was not directly involved
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  i was a victim of circumstances with everything that was going on
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  but it was an adventure and it did
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  it kept my mind occupied even though
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  it was all negative stuff but i still came
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  out and it did it canceled out that seasonal depression because i
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  don't sit here now sitting like i normally do old bluesy in the
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  winter i'm actually sitting here thinking wow hey i've gotten
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  past a bunch of bad stuff and here.
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  I am and the future is actually looking.
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  Better so yeah maybe things happen for reasons like that maybe just find yourself
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  some like like a lot of stuff to do like right around that time like you know.
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  Like mark down the time when you just start making yourself real busy i mean
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  hey whatever works works i say go for it,
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  experiment next year might be trial and error, but.
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  Experiment keep busy keep moving figure some
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  things out and see if it helps yeah
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  definitely and i think that's great advice for everybody figure
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  out the things don't look into them too deeply yeah
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  you can like me you you'll have breakdowns just make sure those breakdowns are
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  small and you get the help right away it picks you up right away and whip you
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  right back into reality and um you'll be able to handle it more and i know everybody's
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  built different i I can't speak for everybody,
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  but look deep,
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  look deep inside of your own, you know, emotions, your own personality.
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  No one knows you better than you do. So find those things that are going to pick you up.
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  And you may even find things that pick you up that you never knew would pick
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  you up. Oh, guilty buzzers.
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  Pick me up. Like, like, um, oh, I'm guilty of this.
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  I don't know if you're guilty of this, but reels, I, that's like one of,
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  one of my guilty pleasures i know i send you a ton and also
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  have you ever heard of asmr it's like sounds and
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  on people like doing things with like um like crushing
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  soap or mixing paint and stuff
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  like that for some reason i get so
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  soothed by those and it's just a very much like a
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  really good pick-me-up and it's really fast so
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  it's nothing like you know um too
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  involved like you can just click on your phone and be like oh yeah that's kind
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  of cool you're breaking some soap that's interesting i i did now yeah i just
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  didn't know there was a name for it but um yeah i think it's asmr yeah yeah um,
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  let me see like there's soaps there's people that clean like
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  patios with pressure washers i really like that one too
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  i don't know why um there's
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  people that do like makeup stuff um they'll like pull
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  the makeup out and put it in a bowl and mix it or they'll
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  actually restore the makeup like if it's all like chunked up and messy i mean
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  it's just about the sounds i think usually now the ones where people are eating
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  i've thought of killing them three ways before i even get the first chomp done
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  because that's oh that's gross i can't do it but.
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  But the little guilty pleasures of just those are very fast pick-me-ups,
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  and I personally enjoy them.
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  I mean, I don't know if other people do, but, you know, some small bite-sized advice from me.
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  There you go. That's all it takes sometimes. It really does.
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  And like I said, everybody knows themselves.
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  Go out there, figure it out, what it is. and or you
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  know whether it's listening to sounds whether it's watching reels
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  whether it's meditation whether it's being out in
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  nature no matter what it is find those things um it
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  i the only thing i could think of with me with the past few months this is how
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  i used to be many years ago like i wasn't satisfied unless there was chaos going
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  on around me i always wanted to be the one to fix it all so i'm able to get
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  back into that a little bit more it's not what i want to do anymore but At least
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  I know how to handle it now.
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  It's just that my body's not ready for it anymore. It's not.
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  So I just got to be careful because emotionally, we need to keep ourselves in check with that.
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  That's the only thing. If you really do feel yourself going off the edge,
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  seek help, get help, call for help, talk to someone.
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  There's nothing wrong with that. Just be strong.
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  Understand that these things are going to happen.
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  So, Jennifer, I do. Yeah. If there's nothing else you want to add,
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  I wanted to kind of cut this out. But uh, yeah, that's good.
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  I mean the one thing I was gonna say is you know, you can't help,
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  you know Chemical imbalances sometimes, you know, so I mean like like you say
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  reach out to people like that's the best advice You know.
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  Sometimes there's things that you just cannot, you know, they're beyond your
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  control. And so, yeah, best advice.
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  Absolutely. So, Jennifer, I thank you again. I thank you for everything.
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  I thank you for all of your spirited talks that we have.
• 18:59
  It means a lot to me. It really does. I wanted to tell you on a public forum.
• 19:02
  Thank you for that because it does.
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  It helps and it helps me to adjust, you know, to things that are going on.
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  And sometimes I look forward to the reels that you send me and I'll never feel
• 19:12
  like, you know, you're sending too much of them.
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  I always do. I'm like, oh my gosh, people are going to like,
• 19:19
  they're going to be like, oh my God, I can't stand her anymore.
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  Please don't send anymore.
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  Don't worry. If it gets overwhelming, I'll tell you. And I want to thank the
• 19:28
  audience too for standing by, for all the words of encouragement and all.
• 19:32
  It's been wonderful to have you guys as the audience. And every time you click
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  that play button, it means something to me.
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  It really does because this is just my outlet and I've been away from it for,
• 19:45
  it wasn't that long, but still, I did miss it and I wanted to get back on the air.
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  So I want to thank you again to the audience for clicking play.
• 19:54
  I want to thank Ann Lund. I want to thank Elaine and Sunset Child for everything
• 19:59
  that they've done for this Eye Opener Society as well.
• 20:03
  And don't forget to find us here on eyeopenersociety.podbean.com or you can
• 20:10
  find us on any platform really, including YouTube.
• 20:14
  Just search Eye Opener Society and you can even find us on Facebook under Eye Opener Society as well.
• 20:19
  So everybody take care and thank you so much for tuning in.