Latest / Man In Your Corner with Shaun Tucker / Ep. 67 | Breaking Sales Fear & Dad Guilt: Mastering Mental Fitness as a Founder Dad
Transcript
- Shaun: Hello and welcome back to the reset episode 67 with me, Sean Tucker. I literally just spent the last few hours designing and recording five epic resources to help you with your decision making, with the way that you fall asleep, the way that you prepare for meetings. and finding balance in your thinking. If you want links ⁓ to these ⁓ resources that I've just comment the breath work, and I'll send you the list. Now, what is today's episode all about? Today I'm just going to be raw and real and see where it goes. As I spoke about in the last few episodes, sales and the ability to influence others, the ability to have conviction about who you are and your value and what you're offering to the world. Your ability to communicate that and influence the people around you so that not only is it creating a win for you, but you're able to see that it's a win for them too. The other part when it comes to sales is understanding that you have to let go of being liked, aka having that fear of being disliked is really going to hold you back when it comes to creating an impact in transformation or selling. So what I mean by that is many coaches, many sales people who are in consultant kind of roles, they probably know their own value. They probably know that their offering can make a real difference to people. But you're probably sitting there if you're in this space and you're thinking, yeah, I already know my value. But when it comes to actually being able to sell, there is a little bit of fear of failure, which means I lose out on getting the client. That might be true in many cases, but there's also this fear that runs a little bit deeper and it might be one of two. One is the fear of being disliked, and the other one is the fear of manipulation. So if you're in a sales environment right now and you're selling in your own business, if you're a coach or if you're listening to this and you want to attract clients and you want to help create transformations for them, learning how to sell without discounting your worth, without challenging and holding them accountable. You're not really, truly leading them to the transformation. Because if you have a fear of being disliked, which is okay to have and be aware of, right? I think a lot of people will have this and they'll still be great salespeople and great coaches. It's only a matter of having awareness of it. Because when you have awareness, you can respond to it. So if you're in one of these environments where you're about to get a client, you've walked them through the sales process, they're really understanding, you you're the person to go to with the problem that they have. You can finally solve the problem that they have, that they've had for a long time. The only trouble is you get down to the investment part of the story, the fair exchange, and then all of a sudden, They respond to the money in such a way that makes you feel like you're manipulating them. makes you feel like, well, they're not gonna like me anymore. But let's be real, it's probably the fear of manipulation that holds most people back. Especially if you're listening to this. So you get down to that part of the sales process, you say what the price is, and then all of a sudden, it becomes very uncomfortable. All of a sudden. these projections of lack of money, scarcity around money, scarcity around finances, scarcity around... Commitment, scarcity around really just the unknown. come up and. you respond in fear because all of a sudden it feels like you're manipulating them to get what you want. So what ends up happening in this moment is you start to make it about you or yourself as the salesperson. So then the story comes in and it's... Me? I can't afford this. I can't afford to have someone challenge me on being who I claim to be. I want it to be easy and comfortable. And that's the only way that we're gonna be able to run a business. Because any other way, where it's uncomfortable... where it's, you know, they're calling me out on my coaching ability. You know, that brings up all these kind of memories of me not being enough, of me feeling like I can't get people results, of me feeling like... I'm just a destined failure. And if you're sitting there thinking... Well this is true and I get what you're saying. But really, that what's stopping me from being able to grow my business? The answer is yes. Because if you have a fear of manipulating people... It's actually a fear of you being manipulated. It's also governed by you having a fear of failure and you failing them. because every reaction creates equal and opposite reactions. because every action creates equal and opposite reaction. This is one of the physical laws. you have that fear of manipulation. they're equally going to carry out that fear of that that piece of not wanting to be manipulated. And when is the dust gonna settle? When is this gonna stop? When are you gonna finally learn? that you're not manipulating people. that all you're doing is allowing them to see if you have the ability to carry them and hold them to the standard that you hold yourself. And the last one, the fear of being disliked. fear of being disliked is mirrored through you needing to be liked. Will you still be able to challenge this person if you're trying to be like? The answer is probably not. If you're still trying to be liked, you're gonna hold yourself back. you're gonna hold yourself back from being the person you claim to be. And that, that is the reason that's stopping you from getting what you want. If you want to be loved, if you want to be the coach, the consultant that you claim yourself to be, then it's very simple. Stop trying to be liked and instead tell the truth. Tell the truth. And if the truth is, they probably can't afford you. And that's the truth. Don't go dancing around. assuming what it is that's gonna stop them from investing in themselves. you know what they say about people that assume you make an ass out of you and me. too often in this space of coaching, consulting, running your own business where you have to sell to grow your business. There are too many assumptions. Ask the damn question. Go for the truth. Go for the truth, not for the sale. The sale and the sale will happen if you lean in and get comfortable with asking and telling the truth. It's as simple as that. So if you found value in today's episode and you want more content like this, please let us know and just refer this to one person. It's how we grow the show. And thank you so much for tuning in. I appreciate you and I look forward to seeing you in tomorrow's episode.