Latest / The Hauraki Big Show / THE DISCLAIMER: Dole Life, With The Fellas

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THE DISCLAIMER: Dole Life, With The Fellas · The Hauraki Big Show

• 0:01
  Speaker 1: For all you mad bastards loving the Big Show podcast,
• 0:06
  Speaker 1: get up even closer on Instagram, YouTube, and TikTok, or
• 0:11
  Speaker 1: Raw Dog It, four to seven every weekday on Radio Hauraki.
• 0:16
  Speaker 1: Good afternoon, gentlemen.
• 0:18
  Speaker 2: Back bonus. Hello there.
• 0:20
  Speaker 1: How's everyone going today?
• 0:22
  Speaker 3: Yeah!
• 0:23
  Speaker 1: Beautiful day, actually, but windy. Bit chilly, a bit nippy.
• 0:27
  Speaker 3: Stunning, though.
• 0:27
  Speaker 2: Bloody beautiful day, man. Bit nippy.
• 0:30
  Speaker 1: Bit nippy.
• 0:31
  Speaker 2: Bloody beautiful. Very happy with that day out there, man.
• 0:33
  Speaker 3: The problem is you live in the CBD now, and
• 0:35
  Speaker 3: so there's big buildings blocking you.
• 0:36
  Speaker 2: You know what the problem with you.
• 0:36
  Speaker 4: Is, man?
• 0:37
  Speaker 1: I've got so many problems. I don't even know where
• 0:40
  Speaker 1: to start with me.
• 0:40
  Speaker 2: There's big buildings blocking you. Have you got 99 problems,
• 0:42
  Speaker 2: but a bitch ain't one? Nah. Oh, a bitch is one.
• 0:47
  Speaker 1: I've got a hundy problems. Um, but what? What were
• 0:53
  Speaker 1: you saying, Keezy? Because I live in the CBD, why?
• 0:56
  Speaker 1: Because there's tunnels, wind tunnels.
• 0:57
  Speaker 3: What the hell's a CBD, why? You're adding an extra
• 1:00
  Speaker 3: letter there, Jase. There's too many letters you made. Um, no,
• 1:03
  Speaker 3: because the big buildings block out all the, like, sunlight
• 1:05
  Speaker 3: and shit. Out west, it's just fucking bright blue everywhere, trees.
• 1:11
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Burnout smoke.
• 1:12
  Speaker 1: Refuse.
• 1:14
  Speaker 3: Fireworks.
• 1:14
  Speaker 1: Dog poos.
• 1:15
  Speaker 2: Dog poos. Yeah, there's dog poos out west. Results.
• 1:18
  Speaker 1: Abandoned cars.
• 1:20
  Speaker 3: I think, Jase, you would admit that you have seen
• 1:23
  Speaker 3: more action of that nature living in town than out west.
• 1:26
  Speaker 1: Actually, yeah, just on that front, you've just reminded me.
• 1:29
  Speaker 1: Three arrests today.
• 1:31
  Speaker 2: Outside your house?
• 1:32
  Speaker 1: Yep, three.
• 1:33
  Speaker 2: Fuck yeah.
• 1:34
  Speaker 1: One at about 7.30 in the morning. An absolute hurr
• 1:37
  Speaker 1: of an argument.
• 1:39
  Speaker 2: What time?
• 1:40
  Speaker 1: About 7.30. An absolute doozy. What was the problem? I
• 1:45
  Speaker 1: don't know. There was just a lot of F-bombs. A
• 1:46
  Speaker 1: bit of silent treatment.
• 1:47
  Speaker 2: A lot of.
• 1:48
  Speaker 1: F-bombs being dropped. And then the police van turned up.
• 1:53
  Speaker 1: Bit of a tussle on the pavement there.
• 1:55
  Speaker 2: Oh, yes.
• 1:55
  Speaker 1: And then the cops running off because someone else is
• 1:58
  Speaker 1: running off down the street. And there's a bus coming.
• 2:01
  Speaker 1: So they're obviously looking to get on the bus and
• 2:03
  Speaker 1: piss off.
• 2:04
  Speaker 2: Oh, that's a good getaway plan.
• 2:05
  Speaker 1: Yes, and the cops were like, no, no.
• 2:07
  Speaker 2: Stops 50 metres up the road.
• 2:08
  Speaker 1: Yeah, but there were three of them today. It was
• 2:10
  Speaker 1: full on. I don't know what it was. Maybe the wind.
• 2:14
  Speaker 2: It was Thursday.
• 2:15
  Speaker 1: And Thursday.
• 2:16
  Speaker 2: Thursday is a, because back in the day, the dole
• 2:19
  Speaker 2: day used to be a Tuesday.
• 2:21
  Speaker 1: For me, it was Thursday, Martin.
• 2:22
  Speaker 2: Then they started mixing it up, and it could be
• 2:24
  Speaker 2: different days.
• 2:25
  Speaker 4: Yes.
• 2:25
  Speaker 2: Different days. That was good, because then you didn't feel
• 2:27
  Speaker 2: so much like you're a bludger, even though you were,
• 2:30
  Speaker 2: because it got spread out a bit, you know?
• 2:32
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 2:33
  Speaker 2: Because when it was just the Tuesday, everybody knew you
• 2:36
  Speaker 2: were a bludger. You know, when you're getting your money
• 2:39
  Speaker 2: out of the bank, et cetera.
• 2:40
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 2:41
  Speaker 2: For sure.
• 2:41
  Speaker 1: For sure.
• 2:42
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 2:43
  Speaker 1: You should go on the dole, Keezy. It's good fun.
• 2:45
  Speaker 3: Well, I was just thinking I've never been on the dole.
• 2:47
  Speaker 3: I wonder if I ever will be on the dole.
• 2:48
  Speaker 2: You pretty much have been, though. You've been a student.
• 2:50
  Speaker 2: Fuck yeah, yeah. Doing jack shit.
• 2:52
  Speaker 3: For three years, I was probably the equivalent.
• 2:54
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 2:55
  Speaker 1: I like the idea my tax dollars are going to
• 3:00
  Speaker 1: people that are just chilling. You know, because I did
• 3:04
  Speaker 1: that for a while.
• 3:04
  Speaker 2: So long.
• 3:05
  Speaker 1: Fill your boots.
• 3:06
  Speaker 2: 100%. You need a bit of time out sometimes, man.
• 3:08
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you do.
• 3:09
  Speaker 2: And let me tell you, you're not living the life
• 3:11
  Speaker 2: of Riley. No. By any stretch of the imagination. Oh, God, no.
• 3:14
  Speaker 2: But what you get to do is just have a
• 3:17
  Speaker 2: little bit of a think.
• 3:18
  Speaker 1: Yes.
• 3:18
  Speaker 2: A bit of a chat. Talk about the state of
• 3:21
  Speaker 2: the world with your mates.
• 3:22
  Speaker 1: Play chess.
• 3:22
  Speaker 2: Get stoned.
• 3:24
  Speaker 1: Drink piss.
• 3:25
  Speaker 3: Yes.
• 3:25
  Speaker 1: And eat toast.
• 3:27
  Speaker 2: And eat toast, yes. It's sort of. For some reason,
• 3:30
  Speaker 2: wallow around in your own filth. It's not a very clean... No,
• 3:34
  Speaker 2: it wasn't for me. What if someone came along.
• 3:36
  Speaker 1: Well, that's because you can't afford cleaning products.
• 3:38
  Speaker 3: If someone came along and was like, hey, fellas, you're
• 3:42
  Speaker 3: going to go on the dole for one year.
• 3:44
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Would that be all G? But why are they
• 3:46
  Speaker 2: saying that? If it's compared to what I'm doing now,
• 3:48
  Speaker 2: then no, I'm not keen on that. I've already done that.
• 3:51
  Speaker 2: But if you're going to pay me to do it,
• 3:52
  Speaker 2: then I'll do it. No, no, you're just on the dole.
• 3:54
  Speaker 2: But I'm busy. I'm too busy to do that. But
• 3:55
  Speaker 2: if I was forced to.
• 3:59
  Speaker 2: For a year. It would be fine. Because I know
• 4:02
  Speaker 2: I can do it.
• 4:03
  Speaker 4: Same.
• 4:04
  Speaker 2: As compared to doing it alone. I couldn't do it alone.
• 4:07
  Speaker 2: I couldn't go out into... Oh, the TV show alone?
• 4:09
  Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah.
• 4:10
  Speaker 2: I couldn't go out into the middle of nowhere and survive.
• 4:13
  Speaker 2: The Hauraki Big Show.
• 4:14
  Speaker 3: Weekdays from 4 on Radio Hauraki.
• 4:18
  Speaker 1: Now that's good listening. And it's live.
• 4:22
  Speaker 2: What are you listening to there?
• 4:24
  Speaker 1: Oh, me? Oh, sorry.
• 4:26
  Speaker 4: I was listening to the Radio Hauraki Big Show.
• 4:30
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 4:31
  Speaker 1: Four to seven weekdays.
• 4:34
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that's quite specific.
• 4:35
  Speaker 3: And iHeartRadio.
• 4:37
  Speaker 2: What?
• 4:38
  Speaker 1: Cheers. The Hauraki Big Show podcast.
• 4:42
  Speaker 3: Hang on, Pugs has got a hot take on this, fellas.
• 4:45
  Speaker 4: If it was $ 100, 000 at the end of the year
• 4:49
  Speaker 4: to go, if you were on the dole for the
• 4:52
  Speaker 4: whole year, would you do it?
• 4:53
  Speaker 2: No, it's still not enough because I'm busy.
• 4:57
  Speaker 1: What do you mean if it was $ 100, 000 they were
• 4:58
  Speaker 1: going to give you?
• 4:59
  Speaker 4: So you go on the dole for a year and
• 5:01
  Speaker 4: that's all you get. But at the end of that,
• 5:04
  Speaker 4: you get $ 100, 000. But you have to do it now.
• 5:06
  Speaker 2: You would do it? I'd do it. Well, what about
• 5:09
  Speaker 2: if the other way of doing it was something's happened
• 5:11
  Speaker 2: in the world and everybody has to go on the dole.
• 5:14
  Speaker 2: And the question is, how would you cope?
• 5:16
  Speaker 4: Yes.
• 5:16
  Speaker 2: My answer to that would be absolutely fine. Same.
• 5:19
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 5:20
  Speaker 3: I'd be okay as well, but I'd get batshit at
• 5:22
  Speaker 3: about three months.
• 5:24
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 5:25
  Speaker 2: Yeah. I'd get batshit because I'd run out of stuff
• 5:28
  Speaker 2: to do. No, you wouldn't. You've got your video games.
• 5:31
  Speaker 3: Nah, they get old real quick. For me, gaming is
• 5:35
  Speaker 3: something that I have to do once I've done other stuff. Otherwise,
• 5:39
  Speaker 3: it gets old real fast and you feel like a
• 5:40
  Speaker 3: piece of shit.
• 5:41
  Speaker 2: I think you'd be right because you do stuff around
• 5:43
  Speaker 2: the house. You do gardening. You do all sorts of
• 5:45
  Speaker 2: different stuff. It's all freak easy.
• 5:48
  Speaker 1: I would spend a lot of time fishing.
• 5:51
  Speaker 2: For compliments? Yes. For boogers out your nose. For change
• 5:57
  Speaker 2: down the back of the couch so you can buy
• 5:58
  Speaker 2: some durries.
• 6:00
  Speaker 3: Fishing your fucking G-banger out of your ass.
• 6:05
  Speaker 1: Fellas, please.
• 6:07
  Speaker 2: It's good stuff.
• 6:09
  Speaker 1: It's very different now for the young folks out there
• 6:13
  Speaker 1: getting on the dole. I tell you what, my daughter's tried.
• 6:16
  Speaker 1: No cerebral.
• 6:18
  Speaker 2: Daddy's on dog squad money.
• 6:20
  Speaker 1: Yeah, exactly.
• 6:21
  Speaker 2: In terms of trying to get on the dole. But
• 6:23
  Speaker 2: if she moved out, she would then be able to
• 6:25
  Speaker 2: get it.
• 6:27
  Speaker 1: Yeah, but then she'd move out and have to try
• 6:29
  Speaker 1: and find somewhere to live.
• 6:30
  Speaker 2: She should find somewhere to live first.
• 6:33
  Speaker 1: I eat about 90% of what she gets.
• 6:34
  Speaker 4: 100%.
• 6:34
  Speaker 3: God, I hate a pain in the neck.
• 6:38
  Speaker 1: 90% or 100%? Well, pretty much a hundy.
• 6:41
  Speaker 2: Hundy pee. You get accommodation allowance, which is separate, and
• 6:44
  Speaker 2: then you have your living costs, you know? Yeah, right, okay.
• 6:48
  Speaker 1: I remember I got off the dole and I worked,
• 6:52
  Speaker 1: and my first week of doing this job, I got
• 6:55
  Speaker 1: paid 700 bucks and I was like, holy fucking hell.
• 7:02
  Speaker 1: That's right. That is amazing, which it is and was
• 7:06
  Speaker 1: back then. I just couldn't believe it. I didn't know
• 7:10
  Speaker 1: what to do with myself. So I got massively steamed.
• 7:13
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that's right. Yeah. Save none of it. No, of
• 7:17
  Speaker 2: course not.
• 7:18
  Speaker 3: If you're single, 25 years or over, you get $ 372
• 7:20
  Speaker 3: a week.
• 7:20
  Speaker 4: Sure, yeah.
• 7:25
  Speaker 3: If you're single and 18 to 19 years living at home,
• 7:28
  Speaker 3: like your daughter, Jase, it's $ 276 a week.
• 7:31
  Speaker 2: Living at home, that's pretty good. And if I was you,
• 7:34
  Speaker 2: I'd take the lot.
• 7:35
  Speaker 3: But she can't because old Horty J's dog squad money.
• 7:39
  Speaker 1: Yeah, because what do they call them? Means tested. Means tested, yeah.
• 7:42
  Speaker 3: And it's pretty fucking low, like the amount that they'll say, no,
• 7:45
  Speaker 3: you can't have it.
• 7:46
  Speaker 2: Yeah. And it's like, well, that's actually not a lot
• 7:48
  Speaker 2: of money at all.
• 7:48
  Speaker 1: No.
• 7:48
  Speaker 3: But yeah, $ 370 a week.
• 7:54
  Speaker 2: Tough. Well, it's not easy. No. They're not there to
• 7:58
  Speaker 2: encourage you to do it, but you can do it.
• 8:00
  Speaker 2: My brother-in-law's just moved into a place, St. Mary's Bay,
• 8:03
  Speaker 2: overlooking the harbour and the bridge and all that, $ 200
• 8:06
  Speaker 2: a week.
• 8:07
  Speaker 4: Wow.
• 8:08
  Speaker 2: So he'd have $ 176 up his sleeve. You can live
• 8:10
  Speaker 2: on that. Is he flatting? He's flatting. Yeah, of course. Oh, yes, Luke, yes, yes.
• 8:13
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 8:14
  Speaker 2: Right, yeah, cool.
• 8:15
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 8:16
  Speaker 2: Fuck, that's a good spot too. It's a great spot.
• 8:17
  Speaker 1: It's a beautiful, you said it's a better view than
• 8:19
  Speaker 1: you've got.
• 8:20
  Speaker 2: Oh. Hands down. How many people in the flat? Five total.
• 8:23
  Speaker 1: 16?
• 8:24
  Speaker 2: Five total. Weirdly, he's on a side. It's got two kitchens.
• 8:28
  Speaker 2: So there's a self-contained unit to one side. There must
• 8:31
  Speaker 2: be a grand living there or something. And then there's
• 8:33
  Speaker 2: another side that's got most of the bedrooms. Is it
• 8:35
  Speaker 2: an old villa? It's not a villa, no, no, no.
• 8:37
  Speaker 2: It's an old, it's sort of a, maybe it was
• 8:40
  Speaker 2: built in the 90s or something like that.
• 8:42
  Speaker 4: Oh, okay.
• 8:42
  Speaker 1: Right, okay.
• 8:42
  Speaker 3: I was going to say, because a lot of those
• 8:43
  Speaker 3: old weatherboard ones, they're like split down the middle and
• 8:45
  Speaker 3: turn into two dwellings sometimes.
• 8:47
  Speaker 2: No, no, no. It's somebody who had money at some point.
• 8:50
  Speaker 1: That was my sort of flatting life in Ponson, being
• 8:53
  Speaker 1: all around those areas where just massively old villas that
• 8:56
  Speaker 1: were falling apart and freezing cold.
• 8:59
  Speaker 2: Yeah, fuck. Well, it's like Dunedin.
• 9:00
  Speaker 1: Freezing cold.
• 9:01
  Speaker 2: Dunedin's like that, except for it's colder. Yes.
• 9:03
  Speaker 3: And like my flat in Christchurch was a shithole. Going
• 9:05
  Speaker 3: back to that now. Weatherboard bungalow. I had a giant
• 9:08
  Speaker 3: room with a giant bay window.
• 9:09
  Speaker 1: Weirdly, like the place, my joints were really nice. But
• 9:14
  Speaker 1: they were just fucking cold and old. They weren't done
• 9:18
  Speaker 1: up or anything like that. But they were really pretty
• 9:21
  Speaker 1: nice joints.
• 9:23
  Speaker 2: It's weird, isn't it, the system we've had for building houses?
• 9:25
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 9:27
  Speaker 2: They don't have to be cold. They just have to
• 9:28
  Speaker 2: keep you out of the wind and the rain. But
• 9:30
  Speaker 2: outside of that, you can get fucked.
• 9:32
  Speaker 3: They don't have to be cold. They don't have to
• 9:33
  Speaker 3: be warm. They don't have to be dry. They don't
• 9:34
  Speaker 3: have to let light in.
• 9:36
  Speaker 2: No.
• 9:37
  Speaker 3: Yeah, back in the day, no one really got... But.
• 9:38
  Speaker 2: The style was because it's the shaky aisles. So it's
• 9:42
  Speaker 2: all the weatherboard and everything because of earthquakes. That's why
• 9:45
  Speaker 2: they're in that style and there's not a lot of
• 9:47
  Speaker 2: brick around. Yeah. But Jesus, she's cold. Like in the UK,
• 9:52
  Speaker 2: I think the people from the UK come down here
• 9:54
  Speaker 2: and they're shocked. Yeah, because everything's brick there. And double
• 9:57
  Speaker 2: glazing and all that sort of stuff. When you find
• 9:59
  Speaker 2: a house... that's got gas internal heating.
• 10:04
  Speaker 1: Game changer.
• 10:05
  Speaker 2: Oh, God, what a life. Yes. What a life. I've
• 10:07
  Speaker 2: never had that. I've never even seen that. I've had that.
• 10:09
  Speaker 2: It's unreal. You see the vents on the floor, you know? Oh,
• 10:12
  Speaker 2: along the, okay. These little vents that are about, maybe
• 10:18
  Speaker 2: 150 mil by 80 mil or something like that.
• 10:20
  Speaker 3: Right.
• 10:21
  Speaker 2: In the corners of each of the rooms or somewhere
• 10:22
  Speaker 2: in the rooms and it's just pumping out from down
• 10:24
  Speaker 2: below the house. Beautiful. Gas just firing up.
• 10:28
  Speaker 3: See, my dream combo.
• 10:29
  Speaker 2: Firing up those fossil fuels.
• 10:30
  Speaker 3: Is the Horty J combo, except for you got rid
• 10:33
  Speaker 3: of your wood burner. It's the wood burner for when
• 10:36
  Speaker 3: it's really cold and you want to be in the
• 10:37
  Speaker 3: lounge and be cosy and the heat pump.
• 10:40
  Speaker 1: I still miss- Yeah, you want the gas. I miss
• 10:43
  Speaker 1: my fire.
• 10:43
  Speaker 3: I like cutting wood and lighting fires.
• 10:45
  Speaker 2: No, no, no. You definitely want the fire. You want
• 10:48
  Speaker 2: one of those mass ports that it's either, you know,
• 10:50
  Speaker 2: sort of cold or a billion degrees and you're walking
• 10:52
  Speaker 2: around in your undies. I love that. Yes. But then
• 10:55
  Speaker 2: the central heating means it's not like a heat pump.
• 10:58
  Speaker 2: You've got this one system of heating under the house
• 11:01
  Speaker 2: or wherever it is, and then it's got vents off
• 11:03
  Speaker 2: to every room in the house. So every room in
• 11:05
  Speaker 2: the house is warm. You don't go, oh. shit, now
• 11:08
  Speaker 2: I've got to go down the hallway and it's fucking
• 11:10
  Speaker 2: freezing and your bedroom's freezing. The whole house is just beautiful.
• 11:13
  Speaker 1: That's exactly what it was. So our lounge would be
• 11:16
  Speaker 1: toasty as, and then we'd walk down the corridor and
• 11:19
  Speaker 1: be like, fuck! Completely different environment. And I used to
• 11:23
  Speaker 1: fantasise and have designs in my head of tubes going
• 11:27
  Speaker 1: out from the fireplace into the rooms. Well, you can
• 11:30
  Speaker 1: get that. I'm sure you can.
• 11:31
  Speaker 2: A heat transfer system, 100%.
• 11:33
  Speaker 1: But I fucking loved me a fire.
• 11:35
  Speaker 4: Same.
• 11:36
  Speaker 3: That's what I said to Lewis. I was like, my
• 11:37
  Speaker 3: next house in Auckland.
• 11:39
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 11:39
  Speaker 3: And the one we're kind of looking at has a
• 11:41
  Speaker 3: fireplace and a chimney. And I'm like.
• 11:43
  Speaker 2: Chim chimney, chim chimney.
• 11:44
  Speaker 1: Chim chimney.
• 11:46
  Speaker 2: Chim chim shrew.
• 11:48
  Speaker 1: Come on, man.
• 11:49
  Speaker 3: No, it's from Mary Poppins. Hey, listen to the big show.
• 11:52
  Speaker 2: Mary Poppin.
• 11:54
  Speaker 3: Poppin dat. Poppin dat ass.
• 11:56
  Speaker 2: Help. High five. Thanks, Mogi. Listen to the big show.
• 12:01
  Speaker 2: Four to seven weekdays.
• 12:02
  Speaker 3: Hodaki.