Latest / Gunhild Torleivsdotter Podcast / #1: Min vei tilbake til stemmen min
Transcript
- Gunhild Torleivsdotter: I have often thought that shit, many times I have just let people overdo me. And then I wonder, what's the with the law of if it's really just about that we should think of everyone else instead of It's all about how you're to function as a person if you're going to put others in of you all the time. What happens to you then? Can you be there for others when you don't have capacity to be yourself? Personally, have that I have severe fibrosis. I get anxiety attacks. I get depressed. I get angry. I get angry at what people who don't deserve to angry at. And it's fucking not worth it. So I have chosen to limits because it's good for myself, but it's fucking good for others too. And if I don't set these limits, it goes out on others. And then I wonder, is it like that the girl's actually It's about just expressing yourself and then you should... No, I don't Go on, I get higher. Is it because it's much more practical to have a person who is negative, feels bad and is a sissy and always follows you around all the time? Is it more practical? Because that's not what I want to that way. don't to that all. Because I want to have a good life. My deserves better. and friends and family deserve better. But if I don't set the clear boundaries, and if I don't say no when my says no, I will never get anywhere. It's so incredibly important to dare to set the boundaries, but of course it's very difficult. It's really hard. But it's so incredibly important. Because if we don't do it, we won't be to move on. That's one thing. But will always be stuck in this... ...injury that I am to. Or... I am not good enough, I am not good enough, so on. But it always with you. It always with you. What are you doing? Me? ha! Fibromyelargie, and that and... I remember very well that day I lost back contact with my It just like everything just rushed out of me. I feel like I'm going fever, because it was so damn hot. There was a big sorrow that happened. I don't want to into details, but... That of all that devilishness I was going through to get where I am today. And what devilishness mean? It means survival. means insane pain in the body. Where I run up and down the mountain in the I was in the trunk at that time. I run up and down and... I couldn't sleep at night, had so much pain in And then I like, okay, what is it will work? What is it needs to be so that I can sleep? And then a voice into my head that said, should run a little more, and if you are tired, should run until you exhausted. Okay, that's what I'm going to So I did it. And I run, and I run. Or I ran. I ran fast uphill. I don't because I'm I'm not very comfortable running, but I ran fast uphill. Up and down, up and down. And do you what's happening? her chicken I was in for four months. I became bedridden for four months because I was out of one night. Night. Four months. So that thing about pushing yourself and pushing yourself... No. And after that day I just told myself that I should never push myself again. It's obvious that I have it in the but not that way. Because that made me realize that I can't go against my in that way. I can't push my so far that it goes to hell. But it's actually lot easier than dealing with the of problem. Why the hell do actually have these aching bodies? It's so much easier just to run a trip or walk a trip or lie down under the But I'm not to And I feel that the book I'm writing now, it's very much about that with... And dare to go in and look at the reason for why it is like that. And actually it starts with the physical body. From the and up to head. And it's so easy to just... Yeah, I'm fine. There's nothing wrong with I'm fine. And especially when it's very easy to just say yes. Yes. But I'm not interested that. I'm not interested when I someone. I don't when someone says... Yeah, I'm fine. The with that is that I hear that someone isn't fine. I because I hear and I see I am highly sensitive so I get with me what others don't get with me. Often highly sensitive people have an incredible property. I I think that's for another episode, but... is see other people. And other people, the dare to go out and actually share. You know what? I'm not that good. And the for that is... And that is also the girl's It is to tell their truth. So really, fuck Jante Lavan! I'm going to in the interlude down to the so that it just bluffs and like one of these pyom pyom that comes out of the Steading light. We must take more space. Girls, boys, more space. You don't anyone's space, you take your space. Come on! So why do I books? Yes, the story I you now is much more than that. I feel that... It's not just me who suffers fibromyalgia and struggles with the things I do. are many out there. And soon after, I think I was ten years old on social media, where I have shared honestly about my situation and my I have received so many feedbacks that it's good that I share and that... that no felt alone. And then I that, okay, it's clear that I have to write a book, because I so many tools, because from... Because from 2016 until now, has happened. wow. I have come so far, I have learned in the last years. It's tools that have made me not them. I don't to push myself anymore. I know where my are. Therefore it is so natural for me to write a book because I know that the tools I have, they must be in a book so that I can help others in same situation. Plus it's an absolute tool that I can use myself as well. This is the book I wish I had as an 18 year old. And everything I collect is a book. It's so cool and I'm so proud of myself for having done this. I haven't finished writing the book. I have a process going on here. But I have... I see... I... has come so far that I can see how it will be. exam. I have planned to launch the book, the Norwegian and the English one, either in spring or autumn of 2027. I might online in the spring and then physically in the autumn, but since I have a close collaboration with the it never know how it will be, so therefore I have thought that It's like spring, autumn. And then I just what's meant to be. And I think that's really cool, because it makes me okay, I have some time for myself. I can enjoy this. It can be a process, an integration, a time to relax on things, because I write a pretty simple book, straight from the start. Many... But when I have a good team, helps me lot to move forward. I'm just to solo episodes. I have plans to have guests in this episode, it will be some solo episodes, some guests. It will be honest topics. Topics that maybe are hard to talk about. No need to be perfect, I can't do that. But... It's clear that... No, perfectionism is not my thing. I do things before I'm done. Neutrality, body, plus humanity and authenticity. The forward, I've been about having 10 Norwegian episodes. And then I'll with English episodes from episode 11. But again, things can happen. I'll take it as it comes. This is going to a fun project. There's nothing... This is not about me like... I have a plan, I an idea, but I don't to stick to I don't need to the plan completely... completely new. So I speak it a like it comes. And I also that even if start with English, could happen that will be some Norwegian episodes in between. So it's not about... It's not about when it's Norwegian, when it's English, but it will be clear. I will mark it clearly, when it's episodes, when it's English episodes. So that it will be very clear for you. So yeah. No, I'm forward it. So I want to thank you for listening. And I like to you to follow me on imgunniltoløfsdotter.com on Instagram. imgunniltoløfsdotter.com, there you find... podcast. you can also find the link to Superstack. Because if I'm going to continue to have podcasts, can be pretty nice to get some support on the way towards writing and podcast sharing. So I would have appreciated that. Hmm Please share this episode with others you know that needed this episode. And with that I would like say welcome. Let's talk about what we have learned and not talk about. Hashtag break the taboo come back to your body come back to yourself