Latest / Johnjay & Rich On Demand / Healthy relationships and decent men don't say THESE THINGS
Transcript
- 0:01Speaker 1: So it's this list of things that creepy guys think
- 0:04Speaker 1: are like normal to say that healthy men would never.
- 0:08Speaker 2: Oh, okay, okay, okay.
- 0:10Speaker 1: So for like example, you're the problem, not me, because
- 0:13Speaker 1: like a healthy man would acknowledge growth and compromise our
- 0:16Speaker 1: essential relationship, whereas like a creepy guy wouldn't.
- 0:21Speaker 2: So you're fighting with somebody, the guy would go, you're
- 0:23Speaker 2: the problem, that's creepy, not me.
- 0:27Speaker 1: Or that's ridiculous, like just belittling your ideas or interests
- 0:31Speaker 1: or concerns, like you know, that's never acceptable and a
- 0:34Speaker 1: healthy man wouldn't fair enough.
- 0:36Speaker 2: So you are sharing with us things creepy guys say.
- 0:42Speaker 3: Right, like dudes that are just not normal.
- 0:44Speaker 2: Okay, what else?
- 0:47Speaker 1: If you really loved me, you do this for me?
- 0:52Speaker 1: Oh that's giving like a manipulation?
- 0:55Speaker 3: Yeah for sure? Yeah gross, there you go again.
- 1:00Speaker 1: Healthy partner tries to understand what's bothering you instead of
- 1:02Speaker 1: just using like a dismissive phrase that treats your feelings
- 1:05Speaker 1: like a constant annoyance.
- 1:07Speaker 3: M h, you're too much work, Kyle? I probably am?
- 1:12Speaker 2: I probably?
- 1:12Speaker 3: Am you right?
- 1:15Speaker 2: Sometimes I think some of the things you're saying can
- 1:18Speaker 2: be creepy, but also like when you say a healthy
- 1:21Speaker 2: guy sounds like just a like a not creepy doesnt
- 1:24Speaker 2: seem like the right word.
- 1:25Speaker 4: They're not calling guys creepy. They send the creepy things
- 1:27Speaker 4: they say instead of being supportive.
- 1:29Speaker 3: We feel like you could say a toxic man.
- 1:32Speaker 1: Things a man says can tell you a lot about
- 1:35Speaker 1: how he treats women.
- 1:36Speaker 2: Like what about this? What about.
- 1:40Speaker 3: Yeah that's number one on the list. That kind of
- 1:47Speaker 3: goes hand in hand with number ten. I don't care.
- 1:52Speaker 2: I do it, but I just go. Or this is
- 1:55Speaker 2: a good one I like to do to my wife whenever,
- 1:57Speaker 2: but I'll just go.
- 2:00Speaker 1: Are trying to make the Sylvia Sylvia?
- 2:09Speaker 2: Is a guy ever saying creepy to you? Yes? What
- 2:12Speaker 2: would they say?
- 2:13Speaker 1: So?
- 2:14Speaker 3: I had an ex boyfriend many years ago, and.
- 2:17Speaker 1: Every time I would log into my social media.
- 2:20Speaker 3: He would stop me on social media and say, why
- 2:23Speaker 3: what are you doing on Facebook? What were you doing
- 2:25Speaker 3: on What's Top five minutes ago? And I'm like, what
- 2:27Speaker 3: do you mean? I said, this is how I communicate
- 2:29Speaker 3: with my friends. So that was a big red flag. Yeah,
- 2:33Speaker 3: you're like, also, why do you know my internet activities?
- 2:35Speaker 3: Every moment of every.
- 2:36Speaker 4: Day is wrong.
- 2:40Speaker 3: I was like, Okay, that's definitely a red flag.
- 2:42Speaker 2: That's a yeah. These could also just be be red
- 2:47Speaker 2: flags total red flags. Yeah, thanks Sylvia, what about you, cop?
- 2:50Speaker 2: But you guys, there's a lot of creepy things to you.
- 2:55Speaker 3: Your comment earlier. Maybe just take one ship.
- 3:02Speaker 4: I say, nobody has to go back.
- 3:10Speaker 2: I will ask her if we.
- 3:14Speaker 4: Need to do better.
- 3:15Speaker 3: What else?
- 3:15Speaker 1: You're just like your mother? Yeah, help, I'd be like,
- 3:20Speaker 1: I know right, I'm like, I love my mom. I
- 3:24Speaker 1: don't have time for this or things. That's like, that's
- 3:27Speaker 1: not my problem.
- 3:28Speaker 4: Hold on a second. Hasn't everybody said I don't have
- 3:30Speaker 4: time for this. Hasn't everybody said.
- 3:32Speaker 1: That this good boyfriend or like a good husband will
- 3:36Speaker 1: prioritize his relationship and we'll make time for you, you know,
- 3:40Speaker 1: if you always get I don't got time for this, Like, Okay,
- 3:43Speaker 1: this is tough.
- 3:43Speaker 4: This is tough to stay away.
- 3:44Speaker 3: From it, right, Okay.
- 3:45Speaker 1: The top three are pretty brutal. So number three, why bother?
- 3:50Speaker 3: You'll never be good at that? Totally? Okay.
- 3:56Speaker 1: Number two you're overreacting. Hell, the communication means validating. No, No,
- 4:04Speaker 1: that one actually hits home, because like I get that
- 4:07Speaker 1: sometimes I can be a little dramatic, little obviously I
- 4:10Speaker 1: am feeling this way for a reason. I also think
- 4:14Speaker 1: there even though you may feel like someone's overreacting flat out,
- 4:18Speaker 1: saying you're overreacting probably makes them overreact even more. Okay,
- 4:23Speaker 1: Number one on the list, this is things that guys
- 4:26Speaker 1: think are normal to say to women that a healthy
- 4:28Speaker 1: mental guess.
- 4:29Speaker 4: It's number one.
- 4:29Speaker 3: What is it?
- 4:30Speaker 4: My guess would be you need to calm down?
- 4:33Speaker 3: Kind of close?
- 4:34Speaker 2: Are you on your period?
- 4:35Speaker 3: Kind of close?
- 4:35Speaker 2: Are you on your period?
- 4:36Speaker 3: Kind of close? Why are you always so emotional?
- 4:43Speaker 1: That is kind of close to I think that is
- 4:45Speaker 1: legitimate because a healthy man understands that emotions are natural
- 4:50Speaker 1: and a healthy part of life. So basically he values
- 4:52Speaker 1: your feelings and listens instead of dismissing them, which it
- 4:55Speaker 1: seems like you can value.
- 4:56Speaker 2: You can value her feelings. But you could also say,
- 4:59Speaker 2: wonder what he's asking like this, Are you on your brother?
- 5:02Speaker 3: That is so annoying?
- 5:04Speaker 4: Probably not a good question down, You know what I
- 5:06Speaker 4: do is I wait till it gets revealed later on,
- 5:09Speaker 4: and then I just go and bay just check it
- 5:11Speaker 4: in my head and be like, Okay, it's a good thing.
- 5:12Speaker 4: I didn't say that.
- 5:14Speaker 3: Check it in your head, keep it there, shut in
- 5:16Speaker 3: your head.
- 5:17Speaker 4: You need to calm down. I realized that doesn't work.
- 5:19Speaker 4: Nobody's ever calmed down.
- 5:20Speaker 2: After you've said you need to calm down, nobody crays well,
- 5:24Speaker 2: thank you, Payton,