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12 - Moon and Sixpence by W. Somerset Maugham · Moon and Sixpence

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  Speaker 1: Chapters thirty one, thirty two, and thirty three of the
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  Speaker 1: Moon and Sixpence. This is a LibriVox recording. All LibriVox
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  Speaker 1: recordings are in the public domain. For more information or
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  Speaker 1: to volunteer, please visit LibriVox dot org. Recording by Barry Eads.
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  Speaker 1: The Moon and Sixpence by William Somerset MAUM, chapter thirty one.
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  Speaker 1: Next day, though I pressed him to remain, struve left me.
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  Speaker 1: I offered to fetch his things from the studio, but
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  Speaker 1: he insisted on going himself. I think he hoped they
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  Speaker 1: had not thought of getting them together, so that he
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  Speaker 1: would have an opportunity of seeing his wife again and
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  Speaker 1: perhaps inducing her to come back to him. But he
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  Speaker 1: found his traps waiting for him in the porter's lodge,
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  Speaker 1: and the concierge told him that Blanche had gone out.
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  Speaker 1: I do not think he resisted the temptation of giving
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  Speaker 1: her an account of his troubles. I found that he
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  Speaker 1: was telling them to every one he knew. He expected sympathy,
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  Speaker 1: but only excited ridicule. He bore himself most unbecomingly knowing
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  Speaker 1: at what time his wife did her shopping. One day,
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  Speaker 1: unable any longer to bear not seeing her, he waylaid
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  Speaker 1: her in the street. She would not speak to him,
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  Speaker 1: but he insisted on speaking to her. He spluttered out
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  Speaker 1: words of apology for any wrong he had committed towards her.
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  Speaker 1: He told her he loved her devotedly and begged her
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  Speaker 1: to return to him. She would not answer. She walked
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  Speaker 1: hurriedly with averted face. I imagined him with his fat
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  Speaker 1: little legs, trying to keep up with her, panting a
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  Speaker 1: little in his haste. He told her how miserable he was.
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  Speaker 1: He besought her to have mercy on him. He promised
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  Speaker 1: if she would forgive him to do everything she wanted.
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  Speaker 1: He offered to take her for a journey. He told
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  Speaker 1: her that Strickland would soon tire of her. When he
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  Speaker 1: repeated to me the whole sort of little scene, I
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  Speaker 1: was outraged. He had shown neither sense nor dignity. He
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  Speaker 1: had omitted nothing that could make his wife despise him.
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  Speaker 1: There is no cruelty greater than a woman's to a
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  Speaker 1: man who loves her, and whom she does not love.
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  Speaker 1: She has no kindness, then, no tolerance, even she has
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  Speaker 1: only an insane irritation. Blanche Strew stopped suddenly, and as
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  Speaker 1: hard as she could slapped her husband's face. She took
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  Speaker 1: advantage of his confusion to escape and ran up the
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  Speaker 1: stairs to the studio. No word had passed her lips.
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  Speaker 1: When he told me this, he put his hand to
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  Speaker 1: his cheek, as though he still felt the smart of
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  Speaker 1: the blow, and in his eyes was a pain that
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  Speaker 1: was heart rending and an amazement that was ludicrous. He
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  Speaker 1: looked like an overblown schoolboy, and though I felt sorry
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  Speaker 1: for him, I could hardly help laughing. Then he took
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  Speaker 1: to walking along the street which she must pass through
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  Speaker 1: to get to the shops, and he would stand at
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  Speaker 1: the corner on the other side as she went along.
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  Speaker 1: He dared not speak to her again, but sought to
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  Speaker 1: put into his round eyes the appeal that was in
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  Speaker 1: his heart. I suppose he had some idea that the
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  Speaker 1: sight of his misery would touch her. She never made
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  Speaker 1: the smallest sign that she saw him. She never even
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  Speaker 1: changed the hour of her errands or sought an alternative rout.
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  Speaker 1: I have an idea that there was some cruelty in
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  Speaker 1: her indifference. Perhaps she got enjoyment out of the torture
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  Speaker 1: she inflicted. I wondered why she hated him so much.
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  Speaker 1: I begged struve to behave more wisely. His want of
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  Speaker 1: spirit was exasperating. You're doing no good at all by
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  Speaker 1: going on like this, I said, I think you'd have
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  Speaker 1: been wiser if you'd hit her over the head with
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  Speaker 1: a stick. She wouldn't have despised you as she does now.
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  Speaker 1: I suggested that he should go home for a while.
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  Speaker 1: He had often spoken to me of the silent town
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  Speaker 1: somewhere up in the north of Holland, where his parents
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  Speaker 1: still lived. They were poor people, his father was a
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  Speaker 1: carp and they dwelt in a little old red brick house,
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  Speaker 1: neat and clean by the side of a sluggish canal.
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  Speaker 1: The streets were wide and empty. For two hundred years,
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  Speaker 1: the place had been dying, but the houses had the
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  Speaker 1: homely stateliness of their time. Rich merchants sending their wares
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  Speaker 1: to the distant Indies had lived in them calm and
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  Speaker 1: prosperous lives, and in their decent decay they kept still
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  Speaker 1: and aroma of their splendid past. You could wander along
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  Speaker 1: the canal till you came to broad green fields with
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  Speaker 1: windmills here and there, in which cattle black and white
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  Speaker 1: grazed lazily. I thought that among those surroundings, with their
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  Speaker 1: recollections of his boyhood, Dirk's truve would forget his unhappiness,
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  Speaker 1: but he would not go. I must be here when
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  Speaker 1: she needs me, he repeated. It would be dreadful if
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  Speaker 1: something terrible happened and I were not at hand. What
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  Speaker 1: do you think is going to happen? I asked, I
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  Speaker 1: don't know, but I'm afraid. I shrugged my sh For
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  Speaker 1: all his pain, Dirk Strove remained a ridiculous object. He
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  Speaker 1: might have excited sympathy if he had grown worn and thin,
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  Speaker 1: He did nothing of the kind. He remained fat, and
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  Speaker 1: his round red cheeks shone like ripe apples. He had
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  Speaker 1: great neatness of person, and he continued to wear his
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  Speaker 1: spruce black coat and his bowler hat, always a little
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  Speaker 1: too small for him, in a dapper, jaunty manner. He
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  Speaker 1: was getting something of a paunch, and sorrow had no
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  Speaker 1: effect on it. He looked, more than ever like a
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  Speaker 1: prosperous bagman. It is hard that a man's exterior should
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  Speaker 1: tally so little. Sometimes with his soul, Dirk Struve had
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  Speaker 1: the passion of Romeo in the body of Sir Toby
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  Speaker 1: Belch He had a sweet and generous nature, and yet
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  Speaker 1: was always blundering a real feeling for what was beautiful,
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  Speaker 1: and the capacity to create only what was commonplace, a
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  Speaker 1: peculiar delicacy of sentiment and gross manners. He could exercise
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  Speaker 1: tact when dealing with the affairs of others, but none
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  Speaker 1: when dealing with his own. What a cruel, practical joke
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  Speaker 1: Old Nature played when she flung so many contradictory elements
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  Speaker 1: together and left the man face to face with the
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  Speaker 1: perplexing callousness of the universe. So ends Chapter thirty one,
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  Speaker 1: Chapter thirty two. I did not see Strickland for several weeks.
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  Speaker 1: I was disgusted with him, and if I had had
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  Speaker 1: an opportunity, should have been glad to tell him so.
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  Speaker 1: But I saw no object in seeking him out for
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  Speaker 1: the purpose. I am a little shy of any assumption
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  Speaker 1: of moral indignation. There is always in it an element
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  Speaker 1: of self satisfaction, which makes it awkward to any one
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  Speaker 1: who has a sense of humor. It requires a very
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  Speaker 1: lively passion to steal me to my own ridicule. There
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  Speaker 1: was a sardonic sincerity in Strickland which made me sensitive
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  Speaker 1: to anything that might suggest oppose. But one evening, when
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  Speaker 1: I was passing along the Avenue de Clicy, in front
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  Speaker 1: of the cafe which Strickland frequented and which I now avoided,
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  Speaker 1: I ran straight into him. He was accompanied by Blanche Strove,
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  Speaker 1: and they were just going to Strickland's favorite corner. Where
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  Speaker 1: the devil have you been all this time? Said he?
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  Speaker 1: I thought you must be away. His cordiality was proof
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  Speaker 1: that he knew I had no wish to speak to him.
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  Speaker 1: He was not a man with whom it was worth
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  Speaker 1: while wasting politeness. No, I said, I haven't been away.
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  Speaker 1: Why haven't you been here? There are more cafes in
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  Speaker 1: Paris than one at which to trifle away an idle hour.
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  Speaker 1: Blanche then held out her hand and bade me good evening.
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  Speaker 1: I did not know why I had expected her to
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  Speaker 1: be somehow changed. She wore the same gray dress that
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  Speaker 1: she wore so often, neat and becoming, and her brow
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  Speaker 1: was as candid, her eyes as untroubled as when I
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  Speaker 1: had been used to see her occupied where their household
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  Speaker 1: duties in the studio. Come and have a game of chess,
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  Speaker 1: said Strickland. I do not know why at the moment
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  Speaker 1: I could think of no excuse. I followed them rather
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  Speaker 1: sulkily to the table in which Strickland always sat, and
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  Speaker 1: he called for the board and the chessman. They both
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  Speaker 1: took the situation so much as a matter of course
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  Speaker 1: that I felt it absurd to do otherwise. Missus Struve
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  Speaker 1: watched the game with inscrutable face. She was silent, but
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  Speaker 1: she had always been silent. I looked at her mouth
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  Speaker 1: for an expression that could give me a clue to
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  Speaker 1: what she felt. I washed her eyes for some tell
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  Speaker 1: tale flash, some hint of dismay or bitterness. I scanned
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  Speaker 1: her brow for any passing line that might indicate a
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  Speaker 1: settling emotion. Her face was a mask that told nothing.
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  Speaker 1: Her hands lay on her lap, motionless, one and the
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  Speaker 1: other loosely clasped. I knew from what I had heard
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  Speaker 1: that she was a woman of violent passions, and that
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  Speaker 1: injurious blow that she had given Dirk, the man who
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  Speaker 1: had loved her so devotedly, betrayed, a sudden temper and
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  Speaker 1: horrid cruelty. She had abandoned the safe shelter of her
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  Speaker 1: husband's protection and the comfortable ease of a well provided establishment,
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  Speaker 1: for what she could not but see was an extreme hazard.
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  Speaker 1: It showed in eagerness for adventure, a readiness for the
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  Speaker 1: hand to mouth, which the care she took of her home,
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  Speaker 1: and her love of good housewifery made not a little remarkable.
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  Speaker 1: She must be a woman of complicated character, and there
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  Speaker 1: was something dramatic in the contrast of that with her
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  Speaker 1: demure appearance. I was excited by the encounter, and my
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  Speaker 1: fancy worked busily while I sought to concentrate myself on
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  Speaker 1: the game I was playing. I always tried my best
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  Speaker 1: to beat Strickland, because he was a player who despised
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  Speaker 1: the opponent he vanquished. His exultation in victory made defeat
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  Speaker 1: more difficult to bear. On the other hand, if he
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  Speaker 1: was beaten, he took it with complete good humor. He
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  Speaker 1: was a bad winner and a good loser. Those who
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  Speaker 1: think that a man betrays his character nowhere more clearly
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  Speaker 1: than when he is playing a game, might on this
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  Speaker 1: draw subtle inferences. When he had finished, I called the
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  Speaker 1: waiter to pay for the drinks and left them. The
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  Speaker 1: meeting had been devoid of incident, No word had been
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  Speaker 1: said to give me anything to think about, and any
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  Speaker 1: surmises I might make were unwarranted. I was intrigued. I
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  Speaker 1: could not tell how they were getting on. I would
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  Speaker 1: have given much to be a disembodied spirit so that
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  Speaker 1: I could see them in the privacy of the studio
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  Speaker 1: and hear what they talked about. I had not the
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  Speaker 1: smallest indication on which to let my imagination work. So
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  Speaker 1: ends Chapter thirty two Chapter thirty three. Two or three
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  Speaker 1: days later, Dirk Strove called on me. I hear you've
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  Speaker 1: seen Blanche? He said, How on earth did you find out?
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  Speaker 1: I was told by some one who saw you sitting
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  Speaker 1: with him. Why didn't you tell me? I thought it
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  Speaker 1: would only pain you. What do I care if it does?
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  Speaker 1: You must know that I want to hear the smallest
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  Speaker 1: thing about her. I waited for him to ask me questions.
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  Speaker 1: What does she look like? He said, absolutely unchanged? Does
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  Speaker 1: she seem happy? I shrugged my shoulders. How can I tell?
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  Speaker 1: We were in a cafe, we were playing chess. I
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  Speaker 1: had no opportunity to speak to her. Oh, couldn't you
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  Speaker 1: tell by her face? I shook my head. I could
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  Speaker 1: only repeat that by no word, by no hinted gesture.
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  Speaker 1: Had she given me an indication of her feelings? He
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  Speaker 1: must know better? Than I. How great were her powers
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  Speaker 1: of self control? He clasped his hands emotionally. Oh, I'm
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  Speaker 1: so frightened. I know something is going to happen, something terrible,
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  Speaker 1: and I can do nothing to stop it. What sort
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  Speaker 1: of thing, I asked, Oh, I don't know, he moaned,
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  Speaker 1: seizing his head with his hands. I foresee some terrible catastrophe.
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  Speaker 1: Struve had always been excitable, but now he was beside himself.
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  Speaker 1: There was no reasoning with him. I thought it probably
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  Speaker 1: enough that Blanche Struve would not continue to find life
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  Speaker 1: with Strickland tolerable. But one of the falsest of proverbs
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  Speaker 1: is that you must lie on the bed that you
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  Speaker 1: have made. The experience of life shows that people are
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  Speaker 1: constantly doing things which must lead to disaster, and yet,
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  Speaker 1: by some chance managed to evade the result of their folly.
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  Speaker 1: When Blanche quarreled with Strickland, she had only to leave him,
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  Speaker 1: and her husband was waiting humbly to forgive and forget.
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  Speaker 1: I was not prepared to feel any great sympathy for her.
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  Speaker 1: You see, you don't love her, said Struve. After all,
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  Speaker 1: there's nothing to prove she is unhappy. For all we know.
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  Speaker 1: They may have settled down into a most domestic couple.
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  Speaker 1: Struve gave me a look with his woeful eyes. Of
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  Speaker 1: course it doesn't much matter to you, but to me,
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  Speaker 1: it's so serious, so intensely serious. I was sorry if
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  Speaker 1: I had seemed impatient or flippant. Will you do something
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  Speaker 1: for me? Asked Struve willingly. Will you write to Blanche
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  Speaker 1: for me? Why can't you write yourself? I've written over
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  Speaker 1: and over again. I didn't expect her to answer. I
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  Speaker 1: don't think she reads the letters. You make no account
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  Speaker 1: of feminine curiosity. Do you think she could resist? She
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  Speaker 1: could mine? I looked at him quickly. He lowered his eyes.
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  Speaker 1: That answer of his seemed to me strangely humiliating. He
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  Speaker 1: was conscious that she regarded him with an indifference so
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  Speaker 1: profound that the sight of his handwriting would have not
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  Speaker 1: the slightest effect on her. Do you really believe that
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  Speaker 1: she'll ever come back to you, i asked. I want
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  Speaker 1: her to know that if the worst comes to the worst,
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  Speaker 1: she can count on me. That's what I want you
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  Speaker 1: to tell her. I took a sheet of paper. What
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  Speaker 1: is it exactly you wish me to say? This is
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  Speaker 1: what I wrote, Dear missus, Strue Dirk wishes me to
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  Speaker 1: tell you that if at any time you want him,
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  Speaker 1: he will be grateful for the opportunity of being of
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  Speaker 1: service to you. He has no ill feeling towards you
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  Speaker 1: on account of anything that has happened. His love for
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  Speaker 1: you is unaltered. You will always find him at the
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  Speaker 1: following address. So ends chapter thirty three.