Latest / Shorter Than Short Podcast / MIKEDJKELLY SHORTER THAN SHORT COMEDY PODCAST 105 ONLY ONE NAME NEEDS CHANGING EDITION
Transcript
- 0:05Speaker 1: It's the Mike Kelly Short and Short Podcast for you all.
- 0:18Let's stick with the snappy start. No waffle. It's the
- 0:22snappy start, Mike DJ Kelly, shorter than short podcast, and
- 0:27the special only one name needs changing edition.
- 0:32Speaker 2: Oh, this week's their first.
- 0:34Speaker 1: Coming up, my amazing digital friend Joyce, fake showbiz news,
- 0:38recommend a pod, charities, fridges, prisons, sourdough, funeral ashes, data centres, owls,
- 0:46plus lots of stuff you don't know that you don't
- 0:49know until you know. Oh, this is going to sound
- 0:56like a politician speaking. It's time for an honest conversation
- 1:02about prisons. Well, I think it is. Current and previous
- 1:06governments have screwed up by not building enough prisons. You're
- 1:10either going to punish people for wrongdoing or let them off.
- 1:14If you're punishing, you need prisons. If not, we have
- 1:18a lawless society. Let's face it. We all know where
- 1:22the biggest crooks are.
- 1:24Speaker 3: Please welcome the star of the show, your host, Mike
- 1:27DJ Kelly.
- 1:29Speaker 1: I'm Mike Kelly with the latest shorter-than-short news. Our top story,
- 1:34Dyson brings out a new toothbrush at nearly £ 500. Guy
- 1:39chucked out of the Tories for sending young men pictures
- 1:43of himself. Jamie McEvoy is now in charge of reforms vetting.
- 1:48The former Duchess of York, Sarah Ferguson, to move back
- 1:52to the UK and rented six-bedroom gated property... in the
- 1:56home counties, after living in a Swiss chalet following the
- 2:00fallout over her ex-husband Andrew Mountbatten-Windsor and Geoffrey Epstein. Tory
- 2:07heavyweight James Cleverley has resigned from the Shadow Cabinet to
- 2:11run for Mayor of London. MP Robert Jenrick has agreed
- 2:16to get his shirt sleeve shortened following several TV appearances,
- 2:21with them hanging like octopus tentacles out of his jacket arms.
- 2:26New survey shows radio and TV stations take money to
- 2:31broadcast adverts for products, but then charges viewers and listeners
- 2:36to receive their services without adverts. Nationwide backlash over the
- 2:42use of sourdough bread in cafes. Punters want a return
- 2:46to the traditional white slice or fried bread. Even bigger
- 2:51nationwide backlash over energy price cap, the cap that keeps
- 2:56moving and not controlling energy prices. And in the late news, Booking.com,
- 3:03the accommodation agency, says it's now taking bookings for 10
- 3:08Downing Street. That's it, you're up to date with all
- 3:11the news that is news this hour. I'm Mike Kelly
- 3:14for STS News.
- 3:16Speaker 2: This is the short of the short podcast with Mike Kelly.
- 3:18Speaker 1: Morning Joyce, what are you carrying on that plate?
- 3:21Speaker 4: Well you probably will not want it after that. It's
- 3:24some buttered sourdough toast. Have you got your false teeth in?
- 3:29Will you be able to cope with its tough and
- 3:31chewy crust?
- 3:32Speaker 1: Yes I have. You're a bit full of yourself today.
- 3:36Get out of the wrong side of bed.
- 3:38Speaker 4: You know I cannot do that, I would fall out
- 3:40of the window. I suppose I'm a bit on edge,
- 3:44I have applied for a new job at Stanley's.
- 3:47Speaker 1: Oh yes, doing what?
- 3:49Speaker 4: It's just a part time one putting the bubble in
- 3:52spirit levels, as you know I did something similar in
- 3:55the past when I used to put the cherries on
- 3:58Sarah Lee cakes back in Bridlington.
- 4:00Speaker 3: Live across the universe, it's the Mike DJ Kelly Shorter
- 4:04Than Shorts podcast.
- 4:06Speaker 1: And what's out there on the social media sites? Nat Milcey, 87.
- 4:13If Apple will bend the knee for a lake, just
- 4:16imagine what it'll do with your data. The Queeves. On
- 4:20the Moscow Metro, trains going towards the centre have the
- 4:24stop announcements made by a male voice and away from
- 4:28the city centre by a female voice. This is designed
- 4:32to make navigation easier for blind people. Rob Moore, going
- 4:38to university in the UK could be a financial trap.
- 4:42We tell 18-year-olds to sign up for £ 50, 000 of debt
- 4:47for a degree in business management that leads to a
- 4:5124k admin job. Meanwhile, the 18-year-old who started a plumbing
- 4:56or electric apprenticeship... is making £ 50, 000 plus by the time
- 5:02they're 23, with zero debt and a skill that Claude
- 5:07can't replace. The university obsession was a trap pushed to
- 5:11keep unemployment numbers looking low. Sonny, a degree in England
- 5:17now costs £ 9, 500 a year in tuition alone. In Germany,
- 5:23it's three. In France, it's a couple of hundred euros
- 5:27a year. In Norway, it's three. In Scotland, it's three,
- 5:31if you're Scottish, three years of much the same lectures,
- 5:36and only here do you walk out owing more than
- 5:39most graduates earn in a year. We're the outlier in Europe,
- 5:44and we discuss it like it's the natural order of things.
- 5:49So when the reform house of cards comes tumbling down,
- 5:54no doubt there will be a feature film to be
- 5:56made about their sorry, scandalous and corrupt role in British politics.
- 6:02I was thinking that Rowan Atkinson would make an excellent Farage,
- 6:06but what about the rest of the Rat Tag crew?
- 6:09Who would you cast to play their parts? Tory fibs
- 6:13that UK's newest prison, HMP Millsike, was handed to a
- 6:18private profit-making corporation to run for a 10-year contract worth
- 6:24£ 329 million. UK taxpayers build prisons only to hand them
- 6:30to profit-making corporations who have no financial incentive to rehabilitate
- 6:38nationalised prisons. Clearly unhinged, I'm so very, very tired of
- 6:44bad people being in charge of the world.
- 6:47Speaker 2: This is the short of the short.
- 6:52Speaker 1: Here's an odd one. How do you dispose of the
- 6:55ashes of a loved one? Well, if you're on land,
- 6:58it's fine. If you don't own the land, you need
- 7:01the owner's permission. Public spaces and parks, you need the
- 7:05council or national trust's permission. And for rivers, lakes and
- 7:10the sea, you need permission from the Environment Agency. And
- 7:15if you're wanting to leave a loved one abroad, similar
- 7:18rules apply. I'm told to take ashes out of the country.
- 7:23Many disguise them as talcum powder and claim to have
- 7:27sweaty feet disorders when questioned at airports, rather than using
- 7:32a more traditional urn.
- 7:34Speaker 2: This is the short of the short, pick-ups with my toy.
- 7:36Speaker 1: Why, oh why, is everything so expensive? What if a
- 7:41family of five wanted passports in the UK? £ 102 each
- 7:47if you do it online. Australia is more expensive at £ 215. America, £ 99. Canada, £ 92. France, £ 73. Ireland, 63.
- 8:01Speaker 2: Germany, 59.
- 8:01Speaker 1: Spain, 30. Why is ours so expensive? So the question
- 8:12everybody's asking is, why is the UK state pension lower
- 8:18than the minimum wage? The official answer, because it's designed
- 8:22as a basic safety net rather than a complete replacement
- 8:26for a working salary, which may be OK if you've
- 8:29paid off your mortgage and got additional private pensions. But
- 8:33if not, you're in bother. All the people on zero-hour
- 8:37contracts unable to buy property, are still going to be
- 8:41renting in old age. How will they afford that on
- 8:45the state pension?
- 8:46Speaker 2: This is the Shorter Than Short podcast with Mike Kelly.
- 8:48Speaker 1: The total cost of a standard 360 credit undergraduate honours
- 8:51degree at the Open University in England has risen dramatically
- 8:59from around 2,100 to 3,600 in the late 1990s, early 2000s,
- 9:00to 24,528 for students starting in the 2026-2027 academic year.
- 9:17When the Open University enrolled its first students in January 1971,
- 9:21under Harold Wilson's vision, a single full-credit undergraduate course cost £ 20.
- 9:28This is the Short of the Short podcast with Mike Kelly.
- 9:35And in our We Want Him Back on the Telespot
- 9:37this week, It's Russ Abbott, born Russell Alan Roberts, 18th
- 9:43September 1947. He is a retired English musician, actor, comedian,
- 9:50born in Chester. He first came to public notice during
- 9:53the 1970s as the singer and drummer with British comedy
- 9:58show band The Black Abbott. later forging a prominent solo
- 10:03career as a TV comedian with his own weekly show
- 10:07on British TV. Continuing his musical career as a solo artist,
- 10:13Abbott released several charting singles and albums. His career has
- 10:18continued worldwide. with a shift more into mainstream serious acting
- 10:23in TV shows, series and stage productions. Now retired and
- 10:28living in Portugal, we want Russ Abbott back on the
- 10:31telly in some new stuff. Come on, Russ.
- 10:34Speaker 4: Yes, let's have him back on the telly with blunder
- 10:37woman Bella Emberg. That would be great. By the way,
- 10:41you mentioned adverts on TV in the news. My tip
- 10:44for saving money is if you do not need what's
- 10:47being advertised. Change channels while the adverts are on.
- 10:53Speaker 1: It's here, the brand new service that saves you money
- 10:56and time. You no longer need to post or courier
- 11:00parcels or gifts. Beam us. Beam me up, Scotty. Household
- 11:05delivery service. It looks like a microwave, and you put
- 11:09the parcel you want to send in the machine. a
- 11:12delivery code number and press the button through the power
- 11:16of bezel beams magnetic levitation acoustic radiation your parcel will
- 11:22be delivered in seconds to the destination code not only
- 11:26that anybody with a similar device can send you parcels
- 11:30in seconds get your new beamers beam me up scotty
- 11:34parcel delivery system today full details of where to buy
- 11:38at the end of the show New rules on letter writing.
- 11:47The Royal Mail says place the recipient's name and address
- 11:52on the bottom left of the front of the envelope.
- 11:55Use clear handwriting with high contrast ink. Left align every
- 12:00line without using commas or full stops. Write the town
- 12:05and postcode in capital letters and put the stamp in
- 12:08the top right corner.
- 12:10Speaker 2: This is the Shorter Than Short podcast with Mike Kelly.
- 12:12Speaker 1: Been a while since we caught up with travel news.
- 12:15Let's catch up now. Has anyone spotted any of these
- 12:19in the wild yet? The Geneptic Vector SR is one
- 12:23of the most advanced enforcement cameras now appearing on UK roads.
- 12:29Unlike older single-lane speed cameras, it can monitor traffic flowing
- 12:34in both directions across up to three lanes. reading number
- 12:38plates using AMPR technology, and operate day and night without
- 12:44any visible flash, thanks to infrared imaging. As well as speeding,
- 12:49it's also designed to catch mobile phone use, seatbelt offenses,
- 12:54and red light violations. all from one single unit. It
- 12:59combines radar-based speed measurements with high-resolution video and an intelligent
- 13:05virtual grid system, giving clear evidence of both the vehicle
- 13:10and its occupants. And unlike traditional cameras, it doesn't even
- 13:15need painted road markings to work, making it far more
- 13:19flexible about where it can be installed. So the next
- 13:22time you spot one of those small yellow cameras on
- 13:25a pole, it might be watching a lot more than
- 13:29you expect. Here's an interesting tale from a Land Rover
- 13:33Freelander owner. So yesterday evening, some lovely gent decided he'd
- 13:38want to save his brakes and use my bumper instead.
- 13:42This morning, I received a call from his insurance company
- 13:46saying he was accepting liability for the accident and they
- 13:50wanted to help in any way possible to get any
- 13:53repairs made as swiftly as possible. They then asked how
- 13:57I wanted to proceed. I said I wasn't interested in
- 14:01claiming because the damage was minimal and the car had
- 14:04fared much worse. So I was happy to just let
- 14:08it be. They informed me as he was claiming on
- 14:11his own insurance for his car and had instigated the
- 14:15claim that I was unable to let it just slide.
- 14:18So I said, fair enough, what do you need from me?
- 14:21Three hours later, they send me a message. They said
- 14:25an estimator had assessed the damage using the photos and
- 14:29it would be more than likely need repairs to the
- 14:32bumper and repainting. But due to the age of the
- 14:35vehicle and its mileage, 232,000 miles, it was beyond economical
- 14:42repair and they would be declaring it a total loss
- 14:45and would be in touch in due course with an
- 14:48offer of settlement and to arrange collection of the Vircor
- 14:52for destruction. I didn't even want to bother claiming. Can
- 14:56they just insist like this and take my car? Britain's
- 15:00first 15mph bike lane will aim to tackle the scourge
- 15:05of speeding cyclists, increasingly threatening the safety of pedestrians. Cambridge,
- 15:11Britain's cycling capital, has introduced new limits along one of
- 15:15the city's most popular bike routes. Cambridgeshire County Council said
- 15:20the move was in response to regular concerns from residents,
- 15:24including older people and families with young children, over cyclists
- 15:29travelling at excessive speeds. Permanent speed limits apply to two
- 15:34share-use paths that run along the city's 60-mile guided busway,
- 15:40which has already been mired in health and safety failings.
- 15:45And from South Canada, after nearly a decade of loudly
- 15:49complaining about the fact that modern US aircraft carriers use
- 15:55electromagnetic systems to launch fighter jets instead of steam-powered catapults,
- 16:01Donald Trump has directed the Pentagon to redesign a new
- 16:06aircraft carrier to replace the modern system with the old-fashioned
- 16:11catapults that he prefers.
- 16:13Speaker 2: This is the.
- 16:19Speaker 1: Recommend a pod, and this time it's a bit different.
- 16:23If you like some good football CEO interviews, why not
- 16:27give Football Business CEO Show a go? Find out more
- 16:31at their YouTube channel at youtube.com at Football Business Television.
- 16:38Speaker 2: This is the first time I've heard what groundwork does.
- 16:41Speaker 1: Today's do-gooders are groundwork.org.uk. Groundwork has been crafting practical projects
- 16:49with corporate public sector and third sector partners for 40 years.
- 16:55Hundreds of projects every year that make real and lasting
- 16:59difference where it's needed most. Partnerships that help people into work,
- 17:05create stronger communities and encourage healthier, greener lifestyles. You too
- 17:11can deliver life-changing projects by working with our local knowledge
- 17:16and national reach. Find out more, join in, help at groundwork.org.uk.
- 17:26And what's been happening in that summer sunshine? Record-breaking heat
- 17:31events in Russia in August, with a persistent high-pressure atmospheric
- 17:36blocking system, often called a heat dome, has pushed historic
- 17:41extreme temperatures eastward. This system brought intense, stifling heat across
- 17:47European Russia, forcing cities like Moscow to deploy water trucks
- 17:53to cool the streets. while citizens seek relief in public fountains.
- 17:58International climate data from the Berkeley Earth confirmed that record
- 18:03high monthly temperatures occurred across western Russia and Siberia.
- 18:09Speaker 2: This is the Shorter Than Short podcast with Mike Kelly
- 18:11in Kent.
- 18:12Speaker 1: Uproar plans to expand an oyster shack. James Green's Oyster
- 18:17Company owns a chunk of Whitstable's shoreline, but success has
- 18:22not brought affection from residents. To me, it is complete bonkers,
- 18:28but it shouldn't be supported. I'm not looking to build
- 18:31flats on the beach. It's decking and a pergola, for
- 18:35goodness sake. Today's music quiz features a 60s magical Motown
- 18:41hit named The Song or The Artiste. But if you
- 18:45leave me a hundred times, a hundred times I'll take
- 18:49you back. I'm yours whenever you want me. I'm not
- 18:53too proud to shout it. Tell the world about it.
- 18:57Name the song, the group or the artiste.
- 19:00Speaker 4: Not a clue, my favorite Motown song is the one
- 19:04from Dirty Dancing, I love doing the party dance routine
- 19:07to the contours and Do You Love Me. I like
- 19:10it nearly as much as the Macarena and that other
- 19:13one by the sweet, Little Willie.
- 19:15Speaker 1: In the weird and spooky stuff, are our phones monitoring
- 19:20what we do or say? Do the glasses near buds
- 19:23track what you're doing and saying? When you're paying by
- 19:27card instead of using cash, are your transactions being watched?
- 19:31Then there's the data centres, with their critical national infrastructure,
- 19:36who decided that level of status so that in emergency
- 19:40situations they can continue to have power. and water. According
- 19:45to Water UK, they say government water plans are flawed.
- 19:50as they do not include data centres. Anyway, why do
- 19:54we need so many? We are a small island. Japan
- 19:59has 227, China has 449, Russia has 251, America 5,427,
- 20:00and the UK 523. Newcastle City Council is using an
- 20:18Amazon contact centre and associated artificial intelligence AI services to
- 20:24handle some residents' requests for services. The benefits are claimed
- 20:29to include faster response times. The risks are acknowledged by
- 20:33the government to include privacy concerns, but the council says
- 20:38it has acted to mitigate these risks. The controversial use
- 20:42of the AI is spreading throughout local government, but in
- 20:46this case of Newcastle's contract centre at least, the North
- 20:51East bylines could find no evidence that it's been debated
- 20:55in public, though it's been in use for more than
- 20:57a year. It first came to the attention of the writer,
- 21:01a Newcastle resident, through an announcement on the website of
- 21:05the Department for Science, Innovation and Technology in August.
- 21:10Speaker 2: This has been a short podcast.
- 21:13Speaker 1: Well, hello. If you're new to the Mike DJ Kelly
- 21:17shorter than short podcast, you can still get to hear
- 21:20all previous episodes just by searching or shouting the Mike
- 21:25DJ Kelly shorter than short podcast. You can also catch
- 21:29me on BCB 106.6 FM. on a Tuesday at midday.
- 21:36That's at bcbradio.co.uk. Here's a warning. Pet owners have been
- 21:45warned they could be unknowingly ripped off by private equity
- 21:49firms who've bought local vet clinics. after the Competition and
- 21:54Markets Authority removed requirements for multinational companies to disclose which
- 22:00practices they own. Pet owners were often unaware their local
- 22:05vet practice could be owned by an international private equity company.
- 22:10If you've ever had the misfortune to use one of
- 22:13these large chains, you will understand why it's best to
- 22:16find a small, local business that cares.
- 22:20Speaker 2: This is the Shorter Than Short Podcast with Mike Kelly.
- 22:22Speaker 1: Here's a nice tale. Had a few days away with
- 22:25the family and we went for our final night out
- 22:29and a meal at the lowest of Tandoori, a place
- 22:32we'd never been to or knew anything about. Anyway, we arrived.
- 22:37A small place but nice and friendly and full. Drinks
- 22:41and poppadoms and food ordered and the one-year-old grandchild goes
- 22:46into tired I want to go home mode. Daughter asked
- 22:50for their food as takeaway. The staff wouldn't hear of
- 22:54it and the lady behind the bar took the child
- 22:57and carried on working while carrying the baby and showing
- 23:00him everything around the bar. Next he went to the kitchen.
- 23:04And taking orders, and then to the front of house,
- 23:08all the staff looked after him as if he was
- 23:11their own. And he loved it. Meal done, and it
- 23:14was an excellent meal, and we left. On looking up
- 23:17the Lowestoft Tandori, the lady who was behind the bar
- 23:21was the mayor of Lowestoft. What a night. What nice people.
- 23:28Let's have some more from the social media sites. If
- 23:33the British press is so fearlessly independent and genuinely interested
- 23:40in the meritocracy, how come we still don't know why
- 23:43that young white blonde lady was elevated into the House
- 23:48of Lords by Boris Johnson? David, I fell off my
- 23:52bike in 1985 and scraped my knee. We didn't have
- 23:57social media then, so I'm telling you now. Anon, a pin,
- 24:02if the average person can't reach the passenger side door
- 24:06handle from the driver's seat of the car, it's too
- 24:09wide for UK roads. Amelia, I don't care what anyone says,
- 24:15wired earphones were better. No charging, no Bluetooth randomly disconnecting,
- 24:22no one ear dying before the other, no bullshit. You
- 24:26plug them in and they just worked. Technology really complicated
- 24:31something that wasn't broken. Sarah Kensior, nothing should require an app.
- 24:37There should always be an alternative. You should always be
- 24:40able to leave your cell phone at home. or not
- 24:44have one at all. This applies to everything, but especially
- 24:47for something as basic as parking. Tyler Bennett's I've decided
- 24:52where possible to buy Bosch white goods and power tools ETC.
- 24:5992% of their profits go to charity, and the remaining
- 25:038% goes to the Bosch family. Capital Stitch Co. Anyone
- 25:08else at the point where they are buying practically nothing
- 25:12because nothing's worth the price anymore.
- 25:15Speaker 2: This is the short of the short.
- 25:19Speaker 1: Fake showbiz news, add fake showbiz news. Former Sheffield United
- 25:25and QPR boss Neil Warnock officially rules himself out of
- 25:30becoming the next James Bond. Andy Burnham unveils his boldest
- 25:35policy yet, an NHS for pets. Feel free to give
- 25:39me the nickname Clement Catterley, he laughed. Nigel Farage's wife
- 25:44asks him to empty the dishwasher, but he tells her
- 25:47he's sadly been advised by police to stay away from dishwashers.
- 25:53UB40 reveal only one of their ten biggest selling singles
- 25:57is not a cover version, and ironically, it's one in ten.
- 26:02Don't forget, my pod-picking friends, if you want to get
- 26:05in touch about anything to do with the Shorter Than
- 26:08Short podcast show, please use the following to contact us.
- 26:11And if you have any stories, gossip, jokes, or anything
- 26:15for the next episode, please do connect and follow Mike
- 26:19DJ Kelly on most social media sites. Don't forget, you
- 26:23can always buy a coffee at gotocoffee.com forward slash Mike
- 26:28DJ Kelly. Any money's raised, go to charity. And in
- 26:36the showbiz corner, it's Jeff Bezos, top man at Amazon. Well,
- 26:41not exactly him, but his wife, Mackenzie Scott, is an
- 26:44American novelist, philanthropist, and early contributor to Amazon. She was
- 26:51married to Jeff Bezos, the co-founder of Amazon, from 1993
- 26:54to 2019. As of December 2025, she had a net
- 27:01worth of US $ 40 billion, according to Bloomberg's Billionaire Index,
- 27:08owning a 1.3% stake in Amazon. The giving pledge, she
- 27:13signed a promise to give away the majority of her
- 27:16wealth during her lifetime.
- 27:18Speaker 4: Do you think we should drop her line?
- 27:21Speaker 1: To say what?
- 27:22Speaker 4: Well just so she knows we are here on this
- 27:24small island and we are all a bit short at
- 27:27the moment and we could help her spend it. I
- 27:30have seen Brewster's Millions with Richard Pryor, it's hard work,
- 27:34to spend all that money. And that reminds me what
- 27:38have the BBC done for me. Well they have ruined
- 27:41BBC 2's Saving Lives at Sea. Yes we might be
- 27:45a small island nation but we do not need every
- 27:47rescue so dragged out and every family member of the
- 27:51survivors interviewed. They have ruined it.
- 27:54Speaker 1: Yes you're right, nothing good to watch these days.
- 27:57Speaker 4: I used to like the goodies they were ahead of
- 27:59their time with Tim. graham and bill on their three-seater
- 28:03tandem my favorite was kitty kong with the giant fluffy
- 28:07white kitten named twinkle rampaging through london and climbing the
- 28:11post office tower.
- 28:12Speaker 2: This is the shorter than short podcast with mike kelly.
- 28:14Speaker 1: And in the stuff you don't know corner did you
- 28:17see all the rubbish at leeds and reading after the
- 28:21festivals what a mess what a waste Not all festivals
- 28:25are as bad as Reading and Leeds. While Reading and
- 28:29Leeds are notorious for rows of abandoned tents, rowdy crowds
- 28:34and mountains of litter, many UK festivals are incredibly well managed,
- 28:40highly sustainable and clean. The chaotic atmosphere at Reading and
- 28:45Leeds is largely driven by their specific demographic, predominantly teenagers
- 28:51celebrating post-GCSE or A-level results, combined with corporate large-scale operations.
- 29:00Other festivals implement strict crowd management strategies, zero-waste policies, and
- 29:06creative site layouts to provide a radically better experience. Some
- 29:12festivals that manage things, Well Green Man Festival in Wales,
- 29:17this fiercely independent non-corporate festival, is widely regarded as one
- 29:23of the best run events in the UK. Located in
- 29:26the Brecon Beacons, it utilises compost tents, renewable energy, and
- 29:32extensive food waste redistribution. The crowd is multi-generational and respectful,
- 29:39leaving virtually no litter behind. Shambhala Festival in Northamptonshire, a
- 29:46true pioneer in festival sustainability, Shambhala has gone fully meat
- 29:51and fish free, bans all single-use plastics and runs entirely
- 29:57on 100% renewable energy. They actively designed the site to
- 30:02prevent overcrowding and maintain a collaborative, community-focused environment. Glastonbury Festival, Somerset.
- 30:11Despite hosting over 200,000 people, Glastonbury manages massive scale through
- 30:18legendary logistics. They employ sophisticated crowdflow management, enforce a strict
- 30:25love the farm, leave no trace policy, and have drastically
- 30:29reduced tenant abandonment rates through aggressive green campaigns. So no excuse,
- 30:36Leeds and Reading. And talking rubbish, which is something I
- 30:40know a lot about, watch out and see how many
- 30:43fridges you can spot. Yes, people cannot take them to
- 30:47the tip, so fly tipping is the answer. Local council
- 30:51rubbish tips, household waste recycling centres in many parts of
- 30:56the UK are currently not accepting fridges and freezers. Current situation,
- 31:02many councils and authorities have suspended fridge and freezer disposal
- 31:07because storage areas at recycling sites are completely full. This
- 31:13is due to a national shortage of specialist recycling and
- 31:17processing facilities capable of safely handling the hazardous gases and
- 31:23insulation materials inside cooling appliances. And talking of going green,
- 31:30have you noticed vehicle number plates that have a green
- 31:34tab to the left-hand side? What does it mean?
- 31:36Speaker 4: I know it means they are a card-carrying, flag-flying supporter
- 31:41of the Green Party and leader Zak Polanski.
- 31:44Speaker 1: No, it indicates that the vehicle is fully electric or
- 31:49hydrogen powered.
- 31:50Speaker 2: This is the Short of the Short podcast with Mike Kelly.
- 31:52Speaker 1: Yes, the celebrity. Since 2005, she has modelled for Marks
- 31:58and Spencers, most recently to promote their recent rebranding. Appearing
- 32:03in TV advertisements and print media, she was named the
- 32:07face of 1966's by the Daily Express and voted British
- 32:13Woman of the Year. Her role in The Boyfriend, 1971,
- 32:18brought her two Golden Globe Awards. Who is she? If
- 32:25you want to get in touch with this top-rated and
- 32:28sometimes much-listened-to podcast, please connect and get in touch about
- 32:32anything to do with the Shorter Than Short podcast. We're
- 32:36on most social media sites at MikeDJKelly. Indeed, if you
- 32:41want a podcast making for your business or need any
- 32:44help with radio producer or presentation work, travel news, voiceover work,
- 32:49podcast editing... please do get in touch. Do please tell
- 32:54your friends about the podcast. All they need to do
- 32:56to find it is search on Google for the Mike
- 33:00DJ Kelly Shorter Than Short podcast. And that final burst
- 33:04from the social media sites, Bob Mitchell, new EU rules
- 33:10mean people now have to be told when they're interacting
- 33:13with AI systems and consuming AI-generated content. And these must
- 33:19be properly labelled. Can the UK please do the same,
- 33:23or even better, just rejoin the EU? Thas. Rip off
- 33:28Britain's strikes again. Just applied to renew my UK passport
- 33:33and nearly fell over when I saw the cost, £ 102 online.
- 33:36It's £ 115. 50 if you send it in a form. That's
- 33:38more than every single one of our ten closest neighbours have.
- 33:46Except Iceland. In Spain, it's £ 25.
- 33:50Speaker 2: 50.
- 33:51Speaker 1: Germany, £ 59. 50. Robert to jump. Everyone, wouldn't it be cheaper
- 33:57and way better changing the name of the lake, gulf
- 34:00or ocean? We should just change the name of the president.
- 34:05Mrs Smokey Mac, I will give cash five years at most,
- 34:10and then the government will have you by the balls.
- 34:13There's no denying cards are handy, but in conjunction with banks,
- 34:17the government will know every movement you make and what
- 34:21you're spending your money on. The closure of banks is
- 34:24no coincidence, is happening for a purpose, and that purpose
- 34:28is eventually a cashless society. The government will then have
- 34:33complete control over of your life. PDC 9909, one 30-credit
- 34:41Open University module. I studied for around £ 400 in the mid-2000s,
- 34:48now costs £ 2, 044. The Open University was created to carry
- 34:53education into the homes of people whom conventional universities had
- 34:59left outside. The door remains open. The price of walking
- 35:03through it has changed. Did Britain genuinely widen access to
- 35:08education or simply replace exclusion with decades of debt? The
- 35:15Howard lead, the prison population, rose this week and now
- 35:19it stands at 86,495. This time last week there were
- 35:21228 fewer people in prison. The prison estate should not
- 35:24hold more than 81,681 people. The population currently exceeds this
- 35:26level by 4,814. Liberty HQ revealed local councils are quietly
- 35:47rolling out live facial recognition technology. Preston City Council and
- 35:52North Tyneside Council are each operating facial recognition technology on
- 35:58more than 100 CCC TV cameras, with data sharing agreements
- 36:04that allow local police forces to access the technology. Other
- 36:09local authorities have announced similar plans for facial recognition in
- 36:14public spaces.
- 36:18Speaker 4: Are you going to mention the Clacton by-election in the
- 36:21late news?
- 36:23Speaker 1: I don't think so. Why?
- 36:25Speaker 4: I just thought it was hilarious that the vote count
- 36:28took such a long time due to there being over
- 36:3134 candidates and the voting forms being over 3 foot long.
- 36:35Speaker 1: And in the late news, farmers are putting up owl
- 36:39boxes instead of buying rat poison. A single barn owl
- 36:43family can take hundreds of rodents in one nesting season.
- 36:48Rodenticides move up the food chain and kill the predators
- 36:52that hunt rodents. Vineyards and orchards now install nest boxes
- 36:58as pest control. The owls work for three and do
- 37:02not poison anything downstream. Find farms using predators instead of
- 37:07poison on Localize. Toby Carvery, the restaurant chain, has launched
- 37:13its roast-inspired flavours to supermarket freezers and a new line
- 37:19on sale at Iceland. London rollout of robot taxes delayed
- 37:24by lack of official guidance for firms to follow. Water
- 37:28companies in England and Wales explore new surge pricing policy.
- 37:34Is it time to close down the Conservative Party due
- 37:37to their poor public rating and defecting MPs? And most
- 37:41of all, because we know most problems that exist today
- 37:44were caused by Thatcher.
- 37:46Speaker 3: I'm sorry, Mr Kelly. You are out of time. You
- 37:49must stop now.
- 37:50Speaker 1: OK, it's time to go. Guess the name of the
- 37:53artiste who had a hip with the song these lines
- 37:56came from. But if you leave me a hundred times,
- 38:00a hundred times I'll take you back. I'm yours whenever
- 38:04you want me. I'm not too proud to shout it.
- 38:07Tell the world about it. Name the song, the group
- 38:10or the artiste. It was the Isley brothers and this
- 38:14old heart of mine. Guess the celebrity? Since 2005, she's
- 38:20modelled for Marks & Spencers, most recently to promote their
- 38:24recent rebranding, appearing in TV advertisements and print media. She
- 38:29was named the Face of 1966 by the Daily Express
- 38:34and voted British Woman of the Year. Her role in
- 38:38The Boyfriend, 1971... brought her two Golden Globes awards. Who
- 38:43is she? Dame Leslie Lawson, knee Hornby, born 19th September 1949.
- 38:52She is an English model, actress, singer, widely known by
- 38:56the nickname Twiggy. Today's do-gooders are groundwork.org.uk, And guess what?
- 39:05As ever, it's been a blast, but that's enough for
- 39:07this special Only One Name Needs Changing edition of the
- 39:12Crazy Shorter Than Short podcast show from me, Mike Kelly.
- 39:16Speaker 4: And me, Joyce, the one with the big smile and
- 39:18the large G and T. Don't forget to tell your
- 39:21friends to listen to the Mike DJ Kelly Shorter Than
- 39:24Short podcast.
- 39:26Speaker 1: Thank you for listening. And remember, you can always find
- 39:29the podcast by searching or shouting the Mike DJ Kelly
- 39:34Shorter Than Short podcast. Thank you.
- 39:37Speaker 2: This is the Shorter Than Short podcast with Mike Kelly.
- 39:42Speaker 1: It's the Mike Kelly Shorter Than Short podcast for you.
- 39:47Speaker 3: Quiet and listen to the Mike Kelly Show.