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333: The Manifestor Deconditioning Process · Unshakeable with Human Design - A Human Design For Business Podcast

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Nicole Laino: Welcome to Unshakeable with Human Design, the show dedicated
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to helping entrepreneurs use human design to shift from hustle to
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flow without sacrificing results.
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Come here to become an unshakeable human and build an unshakeable business
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according to your human design.
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I'm your host, Nicole Laino.
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Hello, and welcome to Unshakeable with Human Design, everybody.
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I'm your host, Nicole Laino, and we're here together, just us.
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And today we're going to talk about manifestors.
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Now, this may resonate for any of you, but when you get your human design
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chart read, or you download the chart for the first time, and you read about
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what you are, and the first thing that we usually read about is our type.
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That's the first thing that we're kind of taught to go to, because
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it's the biggest bang for your buck.
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Five buckets, five different types, we fit into one of those, and then we start
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to get more differentiated as we go down.
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We have authority, we have profile, and we start to get more individual As we go
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down that list, but it starts with type.
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That's like the big top piece that we all start with.
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So there's generators, manifesting generators, projectors,
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manifestors, and reflectors.
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Manifestors make up about eight to 9 percent of the population.
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So they are a very small amount of people.
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They, don't represent a huge portion of the population, but they have such impact.
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Manifestors can really make waves, and they are here to forge new directions.
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They are here to blaze new trails.
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But when you get that, so if you've downloaded your chart, and you read that
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you were a manifester, did that resonate?
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When you heard all of these things about being a manifester, that you are here
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to take charge, that you are here to forge new directions, that you are here
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to create impact in this world, that you have this motor to the throat center,
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which means that you are a manifester in this life, you can make stuff happen.
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That you are creative in nature.
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And that largely with manifestors, what it feels like when they get the, what we call
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the creative urge, they get that feeling, like they want to do something, they will
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move heaven and earth to make it happen.
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And when we talk about that, I always say like, feels like the hand of God
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is moving you, from what I understand from working with manifestors.
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It feels like, and most manifestors have some connection to that, where they'll
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say, yes, I do have a connection to just being internally driven, like, I
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have to do this, my life depends on it.
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Like, I can't not bring this thing into the world.
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So you hear all of that about being a manifester, and then does it feel true?
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Does it feel like you?
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And does it feel like you all the time?
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Now you might have two different answers.
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So that might be like, it feels like me, but it doesn't feel like me all the time.
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I've had a lot of manifesters come to me and say that they don't
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resonate with being a manifester.
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And usually what happens is if we don't resonate with our type, there's
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usually some conditioning at play.
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And today in this episode I really want to talk about the conditioning
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of the manifesto, where it comes from and what we do to overcome it.
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Because what human design tells us, and I think that this is something that gets
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away from us, we get away from this, is we think that all of this stuff is inherent.
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We think that what we talk about in the chart, so the descriptions
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that we give, is inherent.
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That were given in the books, that were given on podcasts, that were
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given in human design readings, that they are foregone conclusions.
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Okay.
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I'm a manifester.
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So therefore I'm a self starter.
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I am a powerhouse.
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I am a trailblazer.
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I am an activator.
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I inspire others.
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I create impact in my life.
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That's all potential.
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It does not mean that you are there because most of us have
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some amount of conditioning.
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Now when we talk about conditioning, you could be
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repressed or you could be reactive.
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You could be repressed.
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As a manifester or as a projector or as a manifesting generator or anything,
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anything in the chart can be repressed.
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So that's going to be more of the shrinking quality of it.
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And then it could be reactive where it's overdone or it has like these
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big swings of volatility with it.
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So there's so many ways that we can look at this, but ultimately what
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we're talking about when we describe.
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When we describe the types and when we describe the other aspects of
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the human design chart, what we're talking about is potential, okay?
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So it's important to understand that if the chart tells you that something
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is your potential, and you are not living up to that potential currently,
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that's not your current reality.
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Then that's where it's, where human design is teaching us to look at
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ourselves a little bit differently and say well, how do I feel
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connected to this and how don't I?
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What is standing in my way of this being my reality?
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Do I see any truth in this?
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And usually people see some truth.
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There's something internally that it strikes a chord with them where they
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say, I know this to be true, but I just, don't feel like I'm living it.
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And then that can make you feel bad.
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I don't want you to feel bad.
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I want you to feel like, wow, that is my potential.
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That's what I've always known because usually we always know it,
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but we're too afraid to go after it.
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And that's the beauty is human design can give you the courage
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to go after your real potential.
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Sometimes we don't know what our potential is.
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It's like, oh feel like there's more to me, like I could be more, I could
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do more with this life in this life, but don't really know what it is.
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And then someone reads you a description of this and you're like, that's it.
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I couldn't put words to it before, but that's it.
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Okay.
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But now how do I get there?
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And the trap.
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Is to read the potential and try to push toward that and then feel like a
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failure when it doesn't go well, like that is where a lot of people end up.
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Oh, you know, I read the thing, but don't know how to be that.
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So what human design tells us and what conditioning allows us to understand,
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if we look at it, we say, okay, if this is what I'm supposed to feel like,
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if this is kind of my potential, then what's keeping me from my potential?
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What is standing in the way?
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What conditioning is there?
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And that's what I kind of want to break down today is typical conditioning
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for manifestors, because that's how we start to use human design
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as a map to help us realize our potential, that is what it's all about.
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That is the entire game here.
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It isn't a fortune cookie.
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It is a personal development tool to help you live out your potential in this life.
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To be the best version of yourself that you could possibly be.
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To be even better than you thought you could be and to start to
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really feel a connection to your greater purpose in this life.
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That's the potential that human design gives us, but you have to do the work.
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And the work is the deconditioning.
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Now, traditional human design will tell you that deconditioning takes seven years.
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And I've explained this on the show before, but I'll mention it again in case
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anybody is new here, which by the way, hi, if you're new, that if you're new
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here and you haven't heard me explain it like this, then it's worth repeating.
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The reason that they say seven years it takes to decondition is because
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cellular turnover takes seven years.
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And so if you think about it, if I started to follow strategy and authority,
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follow my design, decondition myself, start being less of my conditioned self.
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And more of my potential, that is what we're talking about here with
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deconditioning, if I start to go into the things that are keeping me from
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being this potential and I make that my life and I follow my design for the rest
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of my days, then in seven years, there won't be a cell in my body that remembers
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being me today or being me yesterday.
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Not a cell.
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You're literally a different person.
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That's where the seven year thing comes from.
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So can you have tremendous growth and results everything
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before you get to seven years?
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Absolutely.
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Absolutely.
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You do not have to be doing this for seven years to see benefits.
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But the difference is, and I noticed this, I am about five years, going
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on my year five in my experiment.
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So I'm not even at the seven year mark.
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But I will tell you, every year, I notice that I have to do less.
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I am just being my design more.
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I am just riding through life being who I'm meant to be.
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Now it's not all the time, but that's what comes from this.
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I no longer, I'm very much less than Nicole I was five years ago and much
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closer to being my true authentic self.
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And I will absolutely give, the space for that.
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There's still room for me to grow.
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And in seven years, so in two more years, will I be different?
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I have no doubt that I will be different, that this will be more about like,
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this is just a natural way of who I am now, rather than something that I'm
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trying to be or actively having to do.
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And every day I have to actively do less to be who I am.
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And that's the work.
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I didn't just have this like, oh, I read it five years ago and
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now every day just gets easier.
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No, I do the work.
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I've deconditioned.
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I decondition every day.
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It's part of my life.
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And that's how we reach our potential.
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Okay?
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It is an active participation from us.
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It is not passive.
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Okay?
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So let's talk about manifestors here for just a moment.
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Let's talk about manifestors and what they are.
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So type tells us what our aura is.
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Like when we say the five types in human design, we're talking about aura, we're
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talking about your energetic frequency and the quality and style of your aura.
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What do other people feel from you energetically when they are around you?
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They feel a certain type of energy.
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Projectors have a very different energy than generators.
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Manifestors have very different energy from reflectors.
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It is a completely different feeling to the quality of energy that the person has
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from one to, from one type to the other.
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Now then there's also high frequency and low frequency of that energy.
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Now, that's what our signature and not self themes tell us.
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That's why, you know, so we're talking about manifestors.
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Manifestors have a signature of peace and a not self theme of anger.
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That really determines what people feel from us.
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So if you are a manifester, you have what we call a repelling
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aura, a dense repelling aura.
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Now the word repelling sounds nasty and really negative, but it's not that.
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It's just, it's dense, it's big, it's powerful.
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It's very close to their body and it pushes out.
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And I think of it like it's almost like it's clearing the way for all
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that they are to blaze a trail.
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To be able to go in a new direction, you might have to clear a path and that's
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going to take some bold energy, right?
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To be the type of person that can say, I don't care if nobody's gone
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here before, watch out because I'm coming through, I'll make my own path.
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So that's what that big, bold, repelling aura means to me.
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That's how I feel it.
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But you can feel a manifestor it pushes back at you.
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And it can be off putting, particularly if they are in anger.
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If they are in their not self, it's going to be an unpleasant
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feeling for everybody around them.
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You don't really want to be around an angry manifester.
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It doesn't feel good.
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It feels, very uncomfortable because their energy is so powerful.
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But in a manifester at peace.
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It's lovely, you want that person on your team, you want them leading you, right?
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But can be destructive and it can just be uncomfortable.
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Okay.
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So this big personality that a manifester has and this big aura that
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they're carrying, I want you to now think, let's talk about conditioning.
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Let's talk about where conditioning comes from.
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I want you to think about, so when we're, all pretty much know at this
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point that the years from birth to seven years old are the formative years.
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It is when our brain is the most malleable.
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It is before we have core, like real reasoning in the brain.
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You know, before the prefrontal cortex is formed.
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It is the time of where we're soaking everything in like a sponge.
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We soak in what people feel.
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We soak in what people are doing rather than even the things that they are saying.
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Oh, I felt that when I did that, they shut down.
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I felt that when I did that, I got in trouble or I made mom mad.
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Or she suddenly didn't really want to be around me.
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We have to be really careful with kids because they're not necessarily, I
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mean, in most cases, they're not doing this at all, telling us how
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they feel or how we made them feel.
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So what we do is they just start to take that in.
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They take in their experience and what is modeled for them.
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And then they may take that very personally.
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And depending on the child, how much of that becomes part of who they are.
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So now let's talk about what a manifester is as a child.
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So that same, so a manifester in that same time period of zero to seven years
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old how does that repelling aura make mom and dad feel, or their siblings feel, or
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their teachers feel, or their stepdads feel, or the people at the store, or
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the babysitter, or the lady at church?
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How does it make them feel?
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Does it make them feel uncomfortable?
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When that kid gets upset, do other people feel it?
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Now let's tap on if that manifester also has a defined ego and this
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becomes a very willful child.
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That might get even more uncomfortable, right?
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What if it's an emotional manifester child?
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So now when they get angry, they have really powerful emotions on top of it.
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Maybe they're just dealing with their wave and having a hard time with that and
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learning how to ride that wave as a kid.
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And their parent has an open emotional center.
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So they're amplifying that emotional sense that the manifestor kid has, plus
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the manifestors being a manifestor, which what do manifestors do?
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They blaze new trails.
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Manifestors have what we call a motor to the throat.
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Motor directly or indirectly.
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Any of the four motors, the root, well, it won't be a sacral because
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they can't have a sacral or they'd be a manifesting generator.
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So it's either the root, the ego center, or the emotional center, the solar plexus.
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So those three motors, if they are connected to the throat directly
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or indirectly, so they could be root to spleen to throat, that
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is absolutely a manifester, they have this connection means that
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they have manifesting capability.
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It means that there's energy within them that can get out into action and
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communication through their throat center without anybody else's help.
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And there's no sacral, so there's no response.
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They don't have to wait for a damn thing in this life to make them move.
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They're not designed to do that.
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They're not designed to wait for anything.
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They're designed to want something and go do it.
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To want something and go get it and not to tell anybody because they don't
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have the same need for other people.
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I don't want to be real careful with that because this can honestly be damaging.
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Where I think a lot of manifestors can feel isolated already.
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And sometimes that can make them feel worse.
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It's just an energetic thing that they don't need help from anybody else.
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So now there might be nuances to this.
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They might have a, they might have a 3740 channel of community,
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which would make them more, apt to want to connect with people.
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They might be a four line where there's also that extra connection there.
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There's lots of nuances to the chart.
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So I never want to say anything that's a hard and fast rule, but in general,
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they're more individual and they are more interested in their own stuff
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and they kind of like to be left alone and they need their alone time.
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So again, we have that manifestor child that maybe is not asking
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mom, Or not checking in and just going and doing what they want.
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This is the kid that's maybe running away on the playground.
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This is the kid that maybe is doing things that they were told not to
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do, because it's just so ingrained in them that I just want that thing
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and I'm going to go after my thing.
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They do know that from an early age, but it might've been punished.
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They might have been labeled a problem.
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They might have been labeled a rebel.
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They may have been called difficult.
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Nicole They might have been told that they didn't listen and punished
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for that and ridiculed for it.
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All of these things.
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That's the conditioning.
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So what do they learn?
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Let's talk a little bit about how conditioning works from just bit of
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a higher level, not even necessarily about the manifestos for just a moment.
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When we're little, we develop strategies to survive.
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And this is very much, these strategies are our conditioning.
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They're a result of our conditioning.
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So when that manifestor child is labeled difficult, is told that they don't
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listen, and they get in trouble for it, or they get punished for it, or the
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teacher sends home a note, or they get sent to the principal's office, or their
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grandmother won't watch them anymore because they're just too much for them.
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Then what they do is internally, they're not vocalizing it and telling
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anybody because maybe they don't feel like it's safe, but they're hurt.
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And they still, even though they don't need people the same
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way, they want to be loved.
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Kids want to be loved.
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Kids need to be loved and nurtured by their friends, by their family, by the
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people who are supposed to love them.
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And if they're not getting that, then they might start to adapt
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and develop a strategy to survive.
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What are the strategies that keep you alive in childhood?
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Those become the strategies that you employ later on in life unconsciously, and
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they can be the things that hold you back.
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So what are the two most common conditioning strategies for
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manifestors that I've seen?
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So I always say that there are four key strategies that will keep you stuck.
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They are perfectionism, people pleasing, procrastination, and playing small.
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The two I see most often with manifestors are people pleasing and playing small.
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So they learn to Try to get people to love them by people pleasing, by
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putting their needs, their thoughts, their wishes, their dreams, the things
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that they really want to do on the side, because they don't want to ruffle
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feathers and they play nice and they kiss up sometimes, or they play it safe.
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And what does that do?
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Usually it makes them angry, at least eventually.
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They get real, pissed about it because they know how wrong it is.
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They're literally not meant to act like this.
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They're not meant to care what anybody thinks, because when they
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care what somebody else thinks, they might not do the big, bold, different
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thing that they're meant to do
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and then we all miss out, because that's their role.
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In this life, in the world, in the collective, we need the manifestors
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out there doing new things.
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Why?
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Because those become the things that the rest of us do.
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They become the people that we follow.
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They do things and show us what's possible.
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Well, how much are we not getting to believe is possible?
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by the manifester who won't really say what they think or really do what they
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feel is necessary or what they feel called to do because they don't want
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people to not like them because they don't want to make people uncomfortable
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because they don't want to feel unloved.
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You take a manifester who has an open G center, they're really going to
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feel that, I mean, this is, a recipe for people pleasing if they weren't.
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Empowered as children to be who they were, if they were punished at all for
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being who they were, if they were made to feel like their energy was confronting
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to their parents or to their teachers or things like that, it can really
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fall into the people pleasing pattern.
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And then the other one is playing small.
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Just like a cousin of people pleasing, but playing small, it's
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like, I'm afraid of my power.
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Because they know it's big.
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They feel it's big.
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And when they've gone out they have exercised that power and they've
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put it out in the world, it may have been met with resistance.
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Because it threatens people.
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They have to learn to deal with that.
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Those are not your people.
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Those people who are afraid of your power, not your people.
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So this is how conditioning works and this is how later in life and in business
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those strategies of people pleasing and playing small start to show up.
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The other thing I'll add that's not a strategy here but a common conditioning
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of a manifester is they don't want to build anything because they know that
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they're going to hate it eventually.
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So it's just like, oh, why bother?
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But if the urge is really strong, if they really want the thing bad enough,
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on some level they know the act of creating this thing will be enough.
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And they have to be their own voice in their head.
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Or somebody like me who reminds them of that.
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So like that's not how this works for you.
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You just have to build the thing because it feels right.
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It's not about how long it will last.
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It's about the act of creating it.
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That's it.
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You got to let it just be that.
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And that's where it becomes something that no one can know how far it'll
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go or where it'll end up or how big it'll be or what the impact will be.
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But you just have to trust that if you feel called as a
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manifester, that is correct for you.
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So these are the main conditioning factors of, Manifestors and they show
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up in their life and in their business.
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They show up with them, not standing up and showing their power online,
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they might be cowering to a boss, they might be playing small where they're
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not really going after what they feel is right because they don't trust
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themselves enough because they haven't exercised that muscle enough in their
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lives where they've seen it go right.
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So we have to relearn that.
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And that's what deconditioning is.
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It is unlearning all of those teachings from childhood and from, you
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know, and it doesn't stop at seven.
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Those things continue and they just reinforce the beliefs that we have
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and they get more and more ingrained.
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That's why if somebody is 15 years old and they start doing personal development
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and they start being taught about beliefs and all the things that we talk about
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on this show and all of the personal development podcasts and books out
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there, if they start doing that work at 15, they're going to be able to unravel
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their stuff probably pretty quickly.
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Kids who go to therapy and talk about their feelings and stuff
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like that, they're going to have fewer problems later on.
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It doesn't erase the first seven years, but what it does is you,
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it's so much easier to course correct early in the journey than
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it is when you're in your forties.
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Which is what a lot of people from, I am a Gen Xer, millennial cusper.
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So our generation steeped in conditioning, for sure.
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We are just loaded with it.
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most of us didn't get into this until our thirties and it's okay.
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But future generations can start this earlier.
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but we have to unlearn all of that stuff from all the years.
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from all the experiences.
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And we have to go into the emotionality of this, because you might be sitting
24:26
here saying like, well, I know this stuff about me and I feel like I've
24:29
deconditioned, but I still feel like it's hard for me to live up to my potential.
24:35
I can't say anything in a blanket way, , where the answer would be the same for
24:39
everybody but in general I would say that, well then you need to look at your
24:43
emotional attachments to those conditioned responses, to those experiences that
24:48
you've had, because if we're just looking at it cognitively where we're
24:52
like, oh I'm telling myself that this thing isn't true, And if you're telling
24:56
yourself that this thing isn't true and it's still sticking, then you have some
25:00
emotional connection to the belief.
25:03
You have some emotional connection to the conditioning and either the conditioner
25:10
or the experience that you had.
25:13
And you need to process the emotion that is connecting you
25:17
to the event, to the experience, to the feeling, to that belief.
25:22
And that's the deeper work.
25:23
That's what I do.
25:24
Inside Business by Design, we do all of that.
25:27
Like we have a whole deconditioning library.
25:29
I use EFT tapping for deconditioning to help that process go so much faster.
25:34
And so that is what I do, with all of my clients.
25:37
That is my bread and butter.
25:38
I always say you come for the human design, but when you get behind
25:41
the doors, you'll see that most of the work is the deconditioning work
25:44
and tapping will move you so fast.
25:47
Breathwork is also wonderful for that too, but tapping I find to be
25:51
incredible for this type of work.
25:53
But I hope that this episode inspired you to look at your own journey.
25:58
If you're a manifester, how close are you to that potential?
26:01
And how are you still fighting some of that conditioning?
26:04
If you are looking to decondition faster, We have two things.
26:08
I have a free deconditioning guide which you can check out where I
26:11
go through all the centers and everything , basic deconditioning, you
26:14
decondition each of the nine centers.
26:16
We have a free guide on that.
26:17
to DM me.
26:19
On Instagram, I'm at Nicole Leno official.
26:21
DM me the word decondition and we'll send you the guide there or
26:25
go to nicole leno.com/decondition.
26:27
You can get it there or if you want some of those tappings, we
26:31
actually created a little bundle for you, for the tappings on type.
26:36
So we have that, we have like a little tapping bundle that we put together, kind
26:39
of like a starter pack for deconditioning.
26:42
If you're interested in that, just DM me the word tapping on Instagram.
26:46
I'm at Nicole Laino official, and we'll send you the link for that.
26:48
That is a paid offer.
26:50
So just so you know that, but if you're interested in that, DM me the word tapping
26:53
and you can get that, bundle right there.
26:55
We'll send you the link for it.
26:56
I hope you loved this episode.
26:58
I appreciate you.
26:59
Thank you for being here.
27:01
I appreciate you always.
27:02
Remember, in order to have an unshakable business, you must
27:05
first become an unshakable human.
27:06
So thanks for letting us help you become unshakable with human design, everybody.
27:10
We'll see you next time.
27:12
If you love this episode and you're a fan of the show, please show
27:15
us the love on iTunes, Spotify, or wherever you're listening to
27:17
the show and leave us a review.
27:19
And if you'd like to connect with other entrepreneurs on their human
27:21
design journey, join our free Facebook community, Human Design for Entrepreneurs.
27:26
Go to nicolelaino.
27:27
me forward slash podcast links to join the group, book a human
27:31
design reading with me, or access our free human design resources.
27:35
We'll see you there.