Latest / Let's Ask the Mamas! / Financially Helping Adult Kids

Transcript

Financially Helping Adult Kids · Let's Ask the Mamas!

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: We've got a question for American mamas. Your mamas, do
• 0:02
  Speaker 1: you feel like you should financially help your children because
• 0:05
  Speaker 1: times are so different?
• 0:06
  Speaker 2: Well, let's ask our American mamas Mama, Mama.
• 0:21
  Speaker 1: And joining us now are American Mama's Terrin Ediville and
• 0:23
  Speaker 1: Kimberly Burlison. There is a trend with gen Z kids
• 0:28
  Speaker 1: staying at home longer with their parents before they move
• 0:31
  Speaker 1: out on to their own. Is that a good thing?
• 0:34
  Speaker 1: Is that something that you guys would endorse or something
• 0:37
  Speaker 1: that y'all have done.
• 0:40
  Speaker 3: Well, I would do anything for my kids. I would
• 0:42
  Speaker 3: help them. So I understand what some of these parents
• 0:46
  Speaker 3: are doing with their kids. I have family members that think, no,
• 0:49
  Speaker 3: the struggle is part of growth. My kids need to struggle,
• 0:53
  Speaker 3: not giving them a dime. They can do what we
• 0:55
  Speaker 3: went through. I don't think kids today are going through
• 0:58
  Speaker 3: what we went through. I think it's hard for this
• 1:01
  Speaker 3: generation coming up. I know my children have to make
• 1:04
  Speaker 3: twice as much as we did to have the most
• 1:06
  Speaker 3: basic lifestyle, and so I want to help. If I
• 1:11
  Speaker 3: have money and I'm able to, I'm going to help
• 1:14
  Speaker 3: my children. If they need to live with me while
• 1:16
  Speaker 3: they save money, I want them to live with me.
• 1:19
  Speaker 3: I don't understand that mentality of parents saying go figure
• 1:23
  Speaker 3: it out, you can do it. Where times are very
• 1:25
  Speaker 3: different right.
• 1:26
  Speaker 4: Now they are. I feel the same way that Kimberly does.
• 1:29
  Speaker 4: There's nothing I want to do for my children in
• 1:33
  Speaker 4: today's time. Like we were telling Still and Tristan, my
• 1:36
  Speaker 4: son and daughter in law, they just moved to Knoxville
• 1:39
  Speaker 4: and they got a sweet little sixteen hundred square foot house. Yeah,
• 1:43
  Speaker 4: a little bit backyard. Was unbelievable to me. Is they
• 1:47
  Speaker 4: had to pay more for that than we did with
• 1:50
  Speaker 4: our you know, thirty three hundred square foot house and
• 1:52
  Speaker 4: eight acres.
• 1:53
  Speaker 1: Wow.
• 1:54
  Speaker 4: And it is so difficult for this generation. I think
• 1:57
  Speaker 4: it will get better. I think Trump has things in
• 1:59
  Speaker 4: play that will get better for them. But here you
• 2:02
  Speaker 4: have a wife who wants to stay at home, and
• 2:06
  Speaker 4: the husband wants her to stay at home. It's almost
• 2:08
  Speaker 4: impossible for a husband, a young husband and wife to
• 2:12
  Speaker 4: be able to wanted them to stay home and have
• 2:15
  Speaker 4: the kind of you know, have a house, two cars,
• 2:18
  Speaker 4: you know, have the things that they need with a kid.
• 2:21
  Speaker 4: So they're doing it. But yeah, we will, We always
• 2:23
  Speaker 4: say we will help. And in fact, this came up
• 2:25
  Speaker 4: because Tristan. When I was there, my daughter in law,
• 2:28
  Speaker 4: Tristan and I we were driving around and she was
• 2:30
  Speaker 4: looking at school because I'm not sure you know about
• 2:34
  Speaker 4: the school system here in this particular area, and we
• 2:37
  Speaker 4: went by it and I was like, yeah, that's interesting,
• 2:39
  Speaker 4: and I said, well, Tristan, let me tell you something.
• 2:42
  Speaker 4: I said, because Kevin and I are in a place
• 2:45
  Speaker 4: where we can do this, I said, you need to
• 2:47
  Speaker 4: know something. When my children were at Southfield, which is
• 2:49
  Speaker 4: a private school, we did pay for their private school.
• 2:53
  Speaker 4: But so many of those kids at Southfield, their grandparents
• 2:57
  Speaker 4: were putting that bill or their grandchildren's as you. I said,
• 3:01
  Speaker 4: So just just be aware of this because this matters
• 3:04
  Speaker 4: to us so much.
• 3:05
  Speaker 1: You know what Bailey was at Southfield that one year.
• 3:08
  Speaker 1: It was actually my grandfather paid for his year at
• 3:12
  Speaker 1: Southfield many many, many games. So it wasn't his granda,
• 3:15
  Speaker 1: it wasn't his grandparents, it was his great grandparents.
• 3:17
  Speaker 4: You get it, well, I was. That's what I was
• 3:19
  Speaker 4: saying to her, like, there's some things where I don't
• 3:22
  Speaker 4: want you to worry about that. We will help with that,
• 3:25
  Speaker 4: you know. And if you if there's another school that
• 3:26
  Speaker 4: you think, oh, you know, what this is just as
• 3:28
  Speaker 4: good or I want, then whatever, we're going to help
• 3:31
  Speaker 4: because we're in a position that we can, and I
• 3:34
  Speaker 4: really do worry about the ones that don't have parents
• 3:37
  Speaker 4: that can that will pay. You can't, then it's all
• 3:40
  Speaker 4: hands on deck and you do whatever you need to do,
• 3:42
  Speaker 4: live with us or whatever. But I remember the time
• 3:45
  Speaker 4: period that we lived with Khaki for just a little bit,
• 3:48
  Speaker 4: our grandmother for just a little bit when we were little,
• 3:50
  Speaker 4: we were a little bitty, and uh, there's so much
• 3:53
  Speaker 4: good that can come from living with your grandparents. You know.
• 3:56
  Speaker 1: We made a point of our kids always going to
• 3:58
  Speaker 1: see spending time with my parents in the summers. You know,
• 4:01
  Speaker 1: they spent multiple weeks down there because we wanted them
• 4:03
  Speaker 1: to know my parents, and my parents have helped out
• 4:07
  Speaker 1: our kids too. They bought both Bailey and Julie a
• 4:10
  Speaker 1: car because that was something that was something my parents
• 4:13
  Speaker 1: wanted to make sure that they had safe cars and
• 4:16
  Speaker 1: they could get around and do what they needed to do.
• 4:18
  Speaker 1: And Bailey still actually has the car that my parents
• 4:21
  Speaker 1: bought for him. What was it ten years ago. It's
• 4:25
  Speaker 1: been a while, but I guess nine years ago. The
• 4:28
  Speaker 1: bottom of car nine years ago he's still driving that car.
• 4:30
  Speaker 4: Yeah. You know what my grandmother did for me and
• 4:33
  Speaker 4: maybe Kimberly too. She bought our car uh huh, but
• 4:37
  Speaker 4: allowed us to pay back. It was kind of like,
• 4:39
  Speaker 4: we'll go, we're gonna get you a car because you
• 4:41
  Speaker 4: don't have it right now. And I paid back, you know,
• 4:45
  Speaker 4: the money, and she had this little ledger and she
• 4:48
  Speaker 4: would cross off until it got to the very bottom
• 4:50
  Speaker 4: and we had this great celebration nice when it was
• 4:53
  Speaker 4: all paid off. And it was one of the sweetest
• 4:55
  Speaker 4: feelings in the whole world because she couldn't just outright
• 4:58
  Speaker 4: do that right and not I know it was coming
• 5:01
  Speaker 4: back to her because she wasn't in a position, but
• 5:03
  Speaker 4: she found a way to be that person for me
• 5:05
  Speaker 4: to help out. Yeah. What do people do without family?
• 5:09
  Speaker 3: I don't know. I don't know. I'm so grateful that
• 5:11
  Speaker 3: we had the ones that we had and that they
• 5:13
  Speaker 3: helped wherever they could help. Yeah, and I think it
• 5:16
  Speaker 3: makes those ties even closer. You know, you're more bonded
• 5:19
  Speaker 3: when you do that kind of thing. I'm sad for
• 5:21
  Speaker 3: the parents that don't get that and they're like, struggle.
• 5:25
  Speaker 4: I don't feel the struggle because we didn't feel the
• 5:28
  Speaker 4: struggle that this generation is feeling right now. It was
• 5:31
  Speaker 4: not like this, you know, it's so interesting, and.
• 5:35
  Speaker 1: We wanted our kids to be able to start off,
• 5:38
  Speaker 1: you know, as as strong a foot as they possibly can,
• 5:40
  Speaker 1: and as long as, you know, as long Bailey did
• 5:42
  Speaker 1: live with us for a while after you graduated college,
• 5:44
  Speaker 1: but as long as he was moving forward and getting
• 5:46
  Speaker 1: a job and doing that, that's it.
• 5:47
  Speaker 4: That's the key right there.
• 5:48
  Speaker 1: We wanted him he was, he was doing responsible stuff,
• 5:50
  Speaker 1: and we were like, great, we're willing to help.
• 5:52
  Speaker 4: That's it right.
• 5:52
  Speaker 1: If you like to ask her, America Mama is a question,
• 5:54
  Speaker 1: go to our website America I raaded dot com. Slash
• 5:56
  Speaker 1: Mama is a click on the ask the Mama's button.
• 5:57
  Speaker 1: Terry Ntivillekimbley Brothers, and thank you so much.
• 6:00
  Speaker 4: You