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A Pause is NOT a Period · Is Your Way In Your Way?

0:25
Cassandra: They're out there to all my listeners, and I like to welcome you to Is Your Way in Your Way podcast.
0:31
Cassandra: And as many of you are aware, and I know I have some new listeners, my name is Cassandra Crawley Mayo, and I'm your host.
0:37
Cassandra: Also, uh, for those new listeners, again, the title of my book is Is Your Way in Your Way.
0:44
Cassandra: And I am qualified to write that because I have been in my way.
0:49
Cassandra: And it had been in my way for doing things that I always wanted to do.
0:54
Cassandra: Um, I had a fire in my belly about writing a book, and it took me like 12 years.
0:59
Cassandra: I mean, it's just crazy.
1:01
Cassandra: So, because I've been there, I know many of you have as well.
1:04
Cassandra: And I talk about topics related to personal improvement, uh, personal development, self-improvement, and it will also enable you to do a lot of self-reflection, to try to figure out, you know what, if if if she can do that, so can I, you know, and I and my prayer has always been that somebody is really touched by a story, an experience someone has, and decides, you know what, I'm gonna pivot.
1:33
Cassandra: And if she can do it, I can do it.
1:35
Cassandra: So today we have a I love the topic that we have today.
1:39
Cassandra: A pause, a pause, P-A-U-S-E is not a period.
1:44
Cassandra: I love that.
1:45
Cassandra: And um, this young lady by the name of Lorraine Smith, I'm gonna introduce you.
1:51
Cassandra: Um, she is proof that it is never too late to step into your best life.
1:59
Cassandra: Uh, she's actually published uh her first novel at 65.
2:06
Cassandra: So that demonstrates that God's plans are not limited by your age, your time, or your setbacks.
2:13
Cassandra: She showed she you she is going to show us that the dream they uh that she abandoned or delayed can still flourish.
2:21
Cassandra: So let me introduce you to the stage, Lorraine Smith.
2:26
Cassandra: Hi, Lorraine.
2:27
Lorraine: Hi, how are you?
2:28
Lorraine: Thank you so much for having me.
2:30
Lorraine: I'm so excited.
2:31
Cassandra: I am excited too, girl.
2:33
Cassandra: I'm I'm just loving this title.
2:35
Cassandra: A pause is not a period.
2:37
Cassandra: Thank you.
2:37
Cassandra: Well, yeah, Lorraine, what I'm gonna do first is I'm gonna read your bio because a lot of my listeners are like, what qualifies them to talk about this?
2:47
Cassandra: So I'm just gonna read it a little bit so they can get to know you, and then from there, we're gonna dive into some questions.
2:53
Cassandra: Now, Lorraine is an award-winning author in 2025 International Impact Book Awards.
3:03
Cassandra: Congratulations, girl.
3:05
Cassandra: Thank you.
3:05
Cassandra: Uh she's a finalist whose debut novel called Still Searching is a powerful coming-of-age story rooted in resilience, identity, and self-worth.
3:18
Cassandra: A Sumter South Carolina native and a graduate of Johnson C.
3:24
Cassandra: Smith University, Lorraine has spent her professional life as a communication specialist while nurturing life by while nurturing her lifelong passion for storytelling.
3:37
Cassandra: Her path to publication was anything but easy.
3:41
Cassandra: I know about that.
3:42
Cassandra: After she received 60 rejections, check this out 6-0, not six.
3:48
Cassandra: 60 rejections in the 1990s, she set her dream aside to raise her son.
3:55
Cassandra: Decades later, she received her manuscript and assigned a published contract only to be diagnosed with triple negative breast cancer just two months later.
4:08
Cassandra: And you know, guys, I always say uh the higher the level, the bigger the devil.
4:13
Cassandra: Because I say that, you know, that that enemy knew that she was gonna have some uh book that you guys can relate to, and he tried to stop it.
4:22
Cassandra: So what he did is that he said, Okay, I get it.
4:25
Cassandra: I'm gonna have the triple negative breast cancer diagnosis.
4:29
Cassandra: But through her surgeries, her chemotherapy, radiation, and working two jobs, Lorraine persevered, editing her book in the midst of her fight for her life.
4:41
Cassandra: Today, she is a cancer-free, yay! Still Searching has become a celebrated, that's the name of her book, Still Searching, has become a celebrated award-winning novel at the age of 65.
4:56
Cassandra: She resides in Massachusetts, Cambridge, where she enjoys writing, traveling, cooking, and spending time with family and friends.
5:03
Cassandra: Her life and her book mirror the journey of every woman who has ever questioned where she belongs and fought to reclaim her worth.
5:13
Cassandra: And you know, Lorraine, I used to question that.
5:15
Cassandra: Number one, I used to question why am I here?
5:17
Cassandra: You know, things got so crazy in my life.
5:20
Cassandra: And I'm like, well, what?
5:21
Cassandra: I mean, where do I belong?
5:24
Cassandra: I mean, is this all I should do?
5:26
Cassandra: Work, get up in the morning, go to work, come home, eat, look at a little TV, read a little bit, and go to bed.
5:33
Cassandra: I'm like, it has to be more than this.
5:36
Lorraine: Yeah, yeah.
5:37
Cassandra: So let me ask you.
5:39
Cassandra: Now, originally you grew up in Sumter, South Carolina, and you went to to uh Charles.
5:47
Cassandra: Well, I'm getting ready to say Charlotte, Johnson C.
5:50
Cassandra: Smith, which is in Charlotte, North Carolina.
5:52
Cassandra: Yeah.
5:53
Cassandra: Now, I want to know your backstory before up until going to college.
6:01
Cassandra: Tell us about that.
6:02
Lorraine: Okay, well, I you know, my dad was a military and um the Air Force.
6:07
Lorraine: So um I did a lot of extensive traveling, but my mother's originally from Sumter, South Carolina.
6:13
Lorraine: Okay.
6:13
Lorraine: So, yeah, so um after my dad retired, um, my mom wanted to go back home and you know, settle in Sumter, South Carolina.
6:21
Lorraine: So that's you know where we did, what we did.
6:23
Lorraine: And he um we all went to elementary school and high school in Sumter, South Carolina.
6:29
Lorraine: Um, I have um one of five uh siblings.
6:33
Lorraine: I'm the second oldest.
6:35
Lorraine: Uh I um then after you know high school, you know, I went to college, you know, Johnson C.
6:44
Lorraine: Smith University and you know, majored in communications and that sort of thing.
6:48
Lorraine: But you know, going back a little bit, when I was in elementary school and you know, high school, I always loved writing.
6:55
Lorraine: And all my teachers said, Lorraine, you have that gift, you know, I just did it because I enjoyed it.
7:01
Lorraine: You know, I didn't think that it was going to be something that I would, you know, a living or that sort of thing, you know.
7:07
Lorraine: And um, so you know, I would, you know, just enjoy writing short stories.
7:12
Lorraine: I was on the newspaper staff and you know, things of that nature.
7:17
Lorraine: And um they then when I went on to college, you know, I, you know, majored in communications and journalism, and all of my professors, you know, said the same thing, you know, you just you have that gift and you might want to pursue journalism and that sort of thing.
7:32
Lorraine: And I'm like, okay, but I really my passion was broadcasting.
7:38
Lorraine: I guess I love to hear myself.
7:40
Lorraine: Okay, all right.
7:42
Lorraine: So um, you know, I went in that avenue.
7:45
Lorraine: I worked in television and radio for several years, and you know, so that was you know my thing.
7:51
Lorraine: But I but I I wrote as well, but that wasn't my passion.
7:54
Lorraine: I just loved, you know, speaking with people, interviewing and things of that nature.
7:59
Lorraine: Oh um, yeah, so that's um kind of like basically how the things got rolling, and you know, I would, you know, like I said, write all the time.
8:10
Lorraine: And um then after college, my grandmother, well, my dad is from Cambridge, Massachusetts.
8:19
Lorraine: Okay, okay, so yeah, so my dad's side lives here, and my grandmother, who was here at the time, said, Why don't you move to Boston?
8:29
Lorraine: If you don't like it, you could always go back home.
8:32
Lorraine: And I'm like, at the time I was still in Charlotte, yeah, and I said, Okay, sure, I'll relocate.
8:38
Lorraine: So I went home and I told my mom that I was going to move to Charlotte and I mean move to Boston, and she said, You'll be home in a week.
8:48
Lorraine: All right, okay, and it was the weather, you know, because I'm a southern girl, so you know, not used to you know, nor'easters and you know, storms and things of that nature, and the you know, the snow, and so and if she did not say that, I probably would have moved back home after the first week or two.
9:07
Lorraine: But I kept hearing her say that yeah, you'll only be you know, you'll only you'll be home in a week.
9:14
Lorraine: You'll be home in a week.
9:14
Lorraine: That was 40 years later, so I'm still here.
9:18
Lorraine: Oh wow, oh gosh, okay.
9:20
Lorraine: So um, you know, my first job here was um at a local newspaper, and you know, I wrote and you know, that sort of thing.
9:28
Lorraine: And then I moved on to a television station, a local NBC affiliate here in Boston, and was there for like 15 years, loved it.
9:36
Lorraine: Um, and you know, then I was in a relationship, you know, now we're getting to the good part.
9:42
Lorraine: Uh-oh, uh oh.
9:43
Lorraine: Okay.
9:45
Cassandra: All right.
9:46
Lorraine: I yeah, I was in this new relationship with this, you know, gentleman, and um it well, we were dating for like three years or so, and it just, you know, it was going nowhere.
9:57
Lorraine: But I found myself, you know, pregnant.
10:00
Lorraine: Um, I used all the precautions, so I guess it was the divine order.
10:06
Lorraine: Yeah.
10:06
Lorraine: Um and you know, the relationship, you know, it fizzled.
10:11
Lorraine: So, but I found myself, you know, you know, with a beautiful little boy.
10:17
Lorraine: Yeah.
10:17
Lorraine: And at the time I was working, you know, at the NBC affiliate here.
10:21
Lorraine: And um still writing, I'm enjoying my writing and things of that nature.
10:26
Lorraine: So um I just thought I was just writing and writing, and all of a sudden I have a manuscript.
10:33
Cassandra: Right.
10:33
Cassandra: Okay, you know, and let me let me ask you something, Lorraine.
10:38
Cassandra: So as you were growing up, your passion was always broadcasting, journalism.
10:44
Cassandra: But you, I mean, it sounded like you really wanted to be on TV.
10:48
Cassandra: I yeah, right, yeah, and okay, so you made it to television, right?
10:53
Cassandra: But in the midst of all that, you you you started writing because well, when you're in television, you still write, right?
11:00
Lorraine: But you you know, okay, but not to the consistency of you're writing near manuscripts, but you know, okay, okay.
11:07
Lorraine: Writing was always there.
11:10
Cassandra: Okay, well, let me ask you during television, you said that you loved it, right?
11:15
Cassandra: Um what the storytelling aspect of it, the storytelling aspect of it.
11:23
Cassandra: Okay, so how long were you on TV?
11:26
Cassandra: No, I wasn't on it.
11:27
Cassandra: I was on working for the station.
11:31
Lorraine: Yeah, okay, okay, all right.
11:34
Cassandra: Um uh 15 years, 15 years okay, okay.
11:40
Cassandra: Now, what did you specifically do for the station?
11:44
Cassandra: PR.
11:45
Cassandra: Okay, all right, uh-huh.
11:47
Cassandra: But like you said, you were still you were writing, you weren't on TV, you're just writing stories.
11:53
Cassandra: Yeah, right?
11:55
Cassandra: Okay, all right.
11:56
Lorraine: Now, let's go back and out in the community, you know, interacting with people and things of that nature.
12:02
Cassandra: Okay, all right.
12:04
Cassandra: Um, why did you leave?
12:08
Cassandra: Well, what let's let me go back.
12:10
Cassandra: Let me go back.
12:10
Cassandra: Let's talk about the manuscript.
12:12
Cassandra: Okay, you wrote the manuscript while you were working, right?
12:17
Cassandra: And I had an infant.
12:19
Cassandra: Uh-huh.
12:21
Cassandra: And you had to, what was that?
12:45
Lorraine: I said, and I had an infant, you know, a baby with me during that time.
12:49
Lorraine: Single mother, you know, this is like back in the mid to late 90s.
12:54
Lorraine: Um single mother writing um and at the television station.
13:00
Cassandra: Okay, okay.
13:02
Cassandra: And after the manuscript, you submitted it to a lot of places.
13:09
Lorraine: Yes, I wrote the manuscript and 60.
13:11
Lorraine: Well, during that time there was no internet, so you can just push a button and you know your manuscript was going to, you know, 50 or 60, you know, publishers.
13:19
Lorraine: So I um I went to the post office with my 60 manuscripts and with post office and mailed them away.
13:27
Lorraine: And you know, one by one they kept, I received letters stating that thanks, but no thanks, you know.
13:34
Lorraine: And I was like, okay, you know what?
13:37
Lorraine: Maybe God is trying to tell me something.
13:39
Lorraine: You know, you you know, you sent out 60 manuscripts and you were rejected by every last one of them.
13:44
Lorraine: Yeah.
13:44
Lorraine: So I said, okay, Lorraine, maybe it's just not your time.
13:49
Lorraine: Let's put a pen in it, let's put it on pause.
13:52
Lorraine: Okay, all right.
13:54
Lorraine: You have a you have a child to raise.
13:56
Lorraine: Okay.
13:57
Lorraine: And you, you know, let's do that.
14:00
Lorraine: Let's concentrate on your career, your, you know, your son, and you know, let's go, let's follow that path.
14:08
Lorraine: So, and I did.
14:09
Lorraine: And, you know, for years I just forgot about it.
14:12
Lorraine: I mean, I didn't forget about it, but I just, you know, moved on, put it on the back burner.
14:15
Lorraine: Sure.
14:16
Lorraine: And I'll say maybe 10 plus years later, I'm at work.
14:22
Lorraine: I had to go, my manuscript was in a particular cabinet at work, closet.
14:26
Lorraine: And I had to go into that closet, and the manuscript was there with this an inch of dust on it.
14:33
Lorraine: Yeah.
14:33
Lorraine: And um, I opened it to get what I needed, and I just saw the manuscript sitting there, and I looked at it, and I just closed the door.
14:41
Cassandra: Uh-huh.
14:42
Lorraine: Right.
14:42
Lorraine: So, I mean, because you know, no one likes rejection.
14:46
Lorraine: And if you're rejected 60 times, you don't necessarily want to be rejected 61 times.
14:50
Cassandra: I'm telling you, girl.
14:51
Cassandra: I'm telling you, yeah.
14:54
Lorraine: So I was like, okay, no, I'm not gonna do it.
14:57
Lorraine: And that little voice kept saying, Lorraine, open the closet, pull that manuscript out, dust it off.
15:04
Lorraine: I can I ignored it for months.
15:07
Lorraine: Months, I ignored it.
15:09
Lorraine: Yeah.
15:09
Lorraine: And lesson I've learned from that, when that you have that voice where the intuition tells you to do something, just do it.
15:18
Cassandra: Okay.
15:18
Lorraine: But I ignored it.
15:19
Lorraine: You know, sure.
15:20
Lorraine: So months later, you know, I just you know kept ignoring it, kept ignoring it.
15:25
Lorraine: And then I said, you know what?
15:27
Lorraine: What the heck?
15:28
Lorraine: So I opened the cabinet, pulled it out, dusted off, um, did some re-editing.
15:33
Cassandra: Okay.
15:33
Lorraine: And yeah, now I can just push a button and you know, send it to various um publishers.
15:39
Lorraine: And you know, I received some some bites.
15:42
Lorraine: I'm like, okay.
15:43
Lorraine: Oh, okay.
15:45
Lorraine: Yeah.
15:45
Lorraine: And yes, and I'm like, okay, this is great.
15:49
Lorraine: And I chose one particular publishing company because it was a smaller publishing company, and I didn't not necessarily want to go with a large company being a first-time writer.
15:58
Cassandra: Okay.
15:59
Lorraine: And because, you know, I heard that you could kind of get lost, and okay.
16:05
Lorraine: Uh-huh.
16:06
Lorraine: And I wanted someone to hold my hand because this is the first time I'm going through this in the each process.
16:11
Lorraine: Okay.
16:12
Lorraine: So um, that's why I went with this one particular small um publishing company and signed the contract in October, had my mammogram in December.
16:23
Lorraine: Got a call in December from you know the breast center, and they said, Rain Smith, you have breast cancer.
16:35
Lorraine: And I'm like, okay, what happens now?
16:43
Lorraine: I have a son to live for, I, you know, whatever we have to do to make this happen, let's make it happen.
16:51
Lorraine: Yeah, because I want to be here.
16:52
Lorraine: So they said, first thing we're gonna have to do, you know, surgery.
16:57
Lorraine: Then, you know, I you know, I had dealt with my oncologist.
17:00
Lorraine: We had a whole team and you know, surgery, chemo, radiation, and you know, that whole process.
17:09
Lorraine: Yeah.
17:10
Lorraine: And um so I'm like, okay, uh, so I, you know, spoke with my publishing company, which they were absolutely amazing.
17:21
Lorraine: They were very patient, they were very understanding.
17:24
Lorraine: Um, they said, you know, you take care of you first, and you know, we'll we'll just go by on how you feel, we'll, you know, we'll follow your lead.
17:33
Lorraine: And um, you know, they did, they like they were amazing.
17:38
Lorraine: And um, I there were days that I felt okay.
17:43
Lorraine: So, you know, I was editing the book with them, having conversations with them while I was, you know, going through chemo and radiation and that sort of thing.
17:50
Lorraine: And then um, you know, the book was delayed as far as being dates that we planned for publishing, but it was published.
17:59
Lorraine: And I successfully, you know, I'm a cancer survivor now, you know, everything was clean and clear, and you know, so um I just, you know, it was it wasn't like you know, Disney World going with this whole situation, but I knew I wanted to publish this book.
18:22
Lorraine: I want this book out there because you know, it's a coming of age book and it's about a young girl's journey, you know, she's from the South, her journey with relationships with college, with life, career choices, you know, relationships, you know, divorce, death, you know, just um, you know, and after publishing the book, the responses that I received was so many people, it's like they were that main character.
18:54
Lorraine: There, it's so relatable, they can relate to her.
18:58
Lorraine: So, um, you know, so it's just a wonderful, you know, it's the story wasn't so good getting there, but I persevered until I got on the other end.
19:09
Cassandra: Sure, you did.
19:09
Cassandra: Lorraine, how did you get it out there?
19:11
Cassandra: How did people, you know, when I I read a bit a little of it, and and although it was fiction, I felt that's some that's her story, really, you know.
19:22
Cassandra: At first I'm like, but did she change the names?
19:24
Cassandra: You know, I really said I'm like, I wonder is that really her, that girl, you know.
19:29
Lorraine: Um, as as poor, I can definitely relate to her.
19:33
Cassandra: Yes, yes, yeah, yeah, yeah.
19:37
Cassandra: That's what I thought then, but initially, I'm like, that's a pen name, you know, even though you said it was fiction.
19:42
Cassandra: But based on what you said, we all have gone through those experiences, maybe not the way you did, but we've all been there.
19:51
Cassandra: Exactly.
19:53
Cassandra: Right.
19:54
Cassandra: Okay.
19:54
Cassandra: Uh-huh.
19:55
Cassandra: Okay, okay, okay.
19:56
Cassandra: Why did you choose to go um rather than self-publish, you went and looked for a publisher.
20:06
Cassandra: What what was that what were your thoughts in regards to that?
20:11
Cassandra: Why did you go that route?
20:13
Lorraine: Um I just threw it out there.
20:16
Lorraine: Um, you know, you I mean, you hear the uh, you know, the the major publishing companies and that sort of thing.
20:24
Lorraine: And you know, at hindsight 2020 I may have gone with a you know self-publishing, you know, situation, but it was just all I knew at the time.
20:38
Cassandra: Okay, okay.
20:39
Lorraine: So, yeah, and you know, they you know, and it was a small publishing company that really, you know, held my hand and you know, sure really you know.
20:50
Cassandra: Okay.
20:50
Cassandra: And I yeah, and I asked that question because I have a lot of listeners that want to write a book, you know.
20:56
Cassandra: So, you know, they wanted to hear hear your story more.
21:00
Cassandra: And how what why did you go that way?
21:02
Cassandra: And yeah, you know, um, and I don't want them to think, well, she's she is a writer, so she probably knew people, you know, right, exactly.
21:11
Cassandra: And also you you grew up writing, yeah.
21:15
Cassandra: Um right, and storytelling was your thing.
21:19
Cassandra: Um, also, I want to know.
21:22
Cassandra: Okay, you said people that read it.
21:26
Cassandra: How did you market the book when you said people read it could relate?
21:30
Cassandra: What why how was that?
21:31
Lorraine: This wonderful box that we're talking through, the internet.
21:34
Lorraine: Okay.
21:36
Lorraine: Um as well as you know, I my publishing company had a wonderful marketing, you know, and PR department.
21:43
Lorraine: But um, you know, word of mouth, friends, you started, I started out with my friends.
21:48
Lorraine: Um and because the publishing company gives you X amount of books for you know, free, you know.
21:56
Lorraine: That's right.
21:57
Lorraine: So, you know, I would I would give them, you know, the books, and you know, they would read them and they loved them.
22:05
Lorraine: They love the book, and they would tell a few friends, and then next thing I knew, I had a you know, a book signing, a book club, you know, being invited to various book clubs, and that sort of thing.
22:15
Lorraine: So that's how it started.
22:16
Lorraine: It's you know, your friends and the internet.
22:20
Cassandra: Okay.
22:20
Lorraine: And I, you know, so that's basically how it, you know, it's kind of like mushrooms.
22:25
Cassandra: Okay, okay.
22:26
Cassandra: Now tell us the story of how the book is a reflection of every woman who's ever questioned where she belongs.
22:35
Cassandra: How is that?
22:37
Lorraine: Well, growing up, Brenda, who is a main character, she is one of six siblings, and she's like the middle child.
22:44
Lorraine: Okay, and you know.
22:45
Lorraine: The older brother, he could do no wrong.
22:49
Lorraine: The younger ones, you know, they could do no wrong.
22:52
Lorraine: But it seemed like you know, Brenda, you know, she would get blamed for the younger kids, siblings, and it's not her fault, but you know, you're the older, you should know better, kind of thing.
23:03
Lorraine: And she just didn't know where she fit.
23:05
Lorraine: You know, it was like, you know, I basically, why am I here?
23:09
Lorraine: I mean, you know, she, you know, on this side she was wrong, and that side she was wrong.
23:15
Lorraine: And she could, yeah, the more she tried to please her mother, um, it it was never enough.
23:23
Lorraine: Okay.
23:24
Lorraine: So, you know, and you know, her brother went to a particular, you know, in the book, it's based in the south, and the south is very traditional during this period.
23:34
Lorraine: And, you know, you would, you know, go to the same school, get married, you know, that sort of thing.
23:40
Cassandra: Yeah.
23:41
Lorraine: You know, become a teacher or you know, whatever.
23:43
Lorraine: And right I Brenda did not particularly want to attend the same school that her brother did.
23:49
Lorraine: She wanted to, you know, just step out and be her own uh, you know, make her own path.
23:56
Cassandra: Right.
23:57
Lorraine: And um, so you know, that's basically what she did.
24:01
Lorraine: She wanted to find out who she was.
24:03
Lorraine: Okay.
24:04
Lorraine: And she knew she could not do it, seeing attending the same school that her brother did, marrying, you know, the neighbor boy that her mother wanted her to marry, and that sort of thing.
24:15
Lorraine: So she wanted to, you know, step out and she said, There's more to life than this.
24:20
Cassandra: Okay.
24:21
Lorraine: So she had the husfa to go out and explore, whether hell or high water, whatever happened, you know, it was her choice.
24:30
Lorraine: Right.
24:31
Lorraine: And um, and Brenda, she had some it it's a roller coaster ride.
24:36
Lorraine: She had some good times and not so good times.
24:39
Lorraine: Okay.
24:39
Lorraine: Um, but it was a life lesson.
24:41
Lorraine: And you know, and at the end of the day, in the book, even though her mother was kind of hard on her and that sort of thing, but after Brenda was married and had children, she kind of understood why her mom did what she did, you know, as far as raising her is concerned.
25:01
Lorraine: Yeah.
25:01
Lorraine: But you know, that's you know, basically Brenda's story, you know, the trials and tribulations of life, the good, the bad, and the ugly.
25:09
Lorraine: She wanted to, you know, she wanted to pursue it on her own and on her, you know, on her own conditions, and not because someone told her to go to the school, someone told her to take this job, someone told her to do this.
25:19
Lorraine: She wanted to do her own.
25:21
Lorraine: And you know, whether good, bad, or indifferent, that was her choice.
25:26
Cassandra: Okay.
25:27
Cassandra: So uh, what was the end like?
25:29
Cassandra: I mean, so what you indicated is she learned a lot of things just based on her self-discovery journey, so to speak.
25:38
Cassandra: How did how did her story end?
25:43
Lorraine: Well, it's it's still going on, it's an ongoing situation, but um but um she loved and lost, and she realized that life is it's it's a journey, it's you know, there's no particular, you know, it's the ending when it ends, as far as life is concerned.
26:07
Lorraine: But you know, she you know understood how her how people why why and how people made various choices in life.
26:17
Cassandra: Okay.
26:18
Lorraine: And you know, that's basically how it ended.
26:23
Lorraine: She okay, she realized, you know, that everyone's choice is their own choice, it's their you know, their truth, you know, not necessarily it's right or wrong, but it's just you know their their path in life.
26:38
Cassandra: Excellent.
26:38
Cassandra: Okay, so in other words, she went on a self-discovery journey, exactly.
26:43
Cassandra: Yeah, and that was good, and then from that she figured out where she belonged.
26:49
Cassandra: She belonged what she was currently doing, and exactly, right?
26:52
Cassandra: And as she as she moved forward, and when we talk about when individuals read your book, their stories, we all have a story, you know.
27:02
Cassandra: Um, and many like hers, you know, and a lot of us do things that our parents want us to do or our friends, we want permission, then we start comparing.
27:15
Cassandra: And she so I can see why that book, and you called it um uh uh what do we call the meaning, the searching, still searching.
27:25
Cassandra: That's right.
27:27
Lorraine: And she's still searching, and and that's like we're we're always searching for something.
27:31
Lorraine: The more we want, sometimes the more we want more we want, you know.
27:35
Lorraine: That's correct.
27:36
Lorraine: That's correct.
27:36
Lorraine: We're never satisfied, and sometimes God is like, This is it, honey.
27:41
Lorraine: Yeah, right, you know, you you're here, you know, but we keep wanting more, and it's like, no, you you're good right here.
27:47
Lorraine: This is it.
27:48
Lorraine: And then when we go for the more, then you know, something you know, the the bottom opens and we kind of like fall through.
27:55
Lorraine: It's like, okay, I should have listened.
28:00
Cassandra: But but one thing about Brenda, she was adventurous, she went against the status quo.
28:06
Cassandra: Yeah, and if she had not, what would her lesson learn be?
28:11
Cassandra: So she learned so much, you know.
28:14
Cassandra: So she she went out on the limb.
28:16
Cassandra: Exactly.
28:17
Cassandra: Yeah, and that I'm um I wanted to talk about that so my listeners number one, not only get the book, but understand that you're still searching and you're gonna search till the end.
28:30
Cassandra: And one of the things um I shared uh with my listeners is what triggered my book, and it was all about this woman who was a hospice nurse by the name of Bonnie Ware.
28:45
Cassandra: And Bonnie interviewed individuals transitioning, and she created a book from it, but there were just five common themes, and two of them really bothered me.
28:55
Cassandra: You know, three of the I shouldn't have worked so hard, I should have visited more friends and family, I should have traveled.
29:02
Cassandra: But the two was I wish I'd have been more true to myself, and I wish I could have been happier.
29:08
Cassandra: And when I saw that, I'm like, dang, am I true to myself?
29:12
Cassandra: Am I ever happy?
29:13
Cassandra: You know, and but but I translate happy to joy because I want to have joy.
29:18
Cassandra: To me, happy is a happening.
29:20
Cassandra: That's just that's just my thing.
29:22
Cassandra: And I was like, Joy is, yeah.
29:24
Cassandra: Yeah, and I'm like, what?
29:26
Cassandra: I mean, why couldn't they be true to themselves?
29:30
Cassandra: Why can't they be happy?
29:31
Cassandra: So I'm like, okay, let's all do some soul searching, like your book.
29:35
Cassandra: Let's search and see what that thing is all about.
29:38
Cassandra: And one of the things that I say is I don't want any of my clients, my listeners to die with regrets.
29:47
Cassandra: Right.
29:48
Lorraine: And Brenda didn't want any regrets either.
29:50
Lorraine: Brenda did not want any regrets.
29:52
Lorraine: Say, I wish I could have, shoulda.
29:53
Lorraine: She did not want that.
29:55
Cassandra: Exactly.
29:55
Cassandra: And the coulda should is judgment.
29:57
Cassandra: You're judging when you say I should have, I could have, you know, so I'm like, don't shoot on me.
30:03
Cassandra: Yeah, right.
30:04
Cassandra: Right, don't, don't, don't do that to me.
30:07
Cassandra: Yeah, wow, that's amazing.
30:09
Cassandra: Um, so when you receive your award, well, let me let me I want to go back to something.
30:15
Cassandra: Remember, you talked about when your mom said, You'll be back.
30:20
Cassandra: Oh, you'll be back.
30:21
Cassandra: And just her saying that was like, you became defiant.
30:26
Cassandra: I am not.
30:27
Lorraine: I'm a I'm gonna prove to you that everyone else, yeah.
30:32
Cassandra: That's right, that's right.
30:33
Cassandra: Kind of like when I was working and I had a boss, I got a new job, and the boss said, Hey, um, many of your colleagues don't think you're fit for this job.
30:42
Cassandra: And I'm like, Really?
30:44
Cassandra: Like, you know, they're saying you're embarrassed, and then I'm like, really?
30:48
Cassandra: And I was hurt, I was hurt, and I asked him, could I go home?
30:52
Cassandra: And he said, You may want to think about getting back in the industry that you were in.
30:57
Cassandra: So I went home and cried and uh called my parents and and had a talk.
31:03
Cassandra: And then all of a sudden I'm like, I'm not leaving, I'm not going back to another job, I'm gonna prove to them, you know.
31:10
Cassandra: So that's why you were like, you know what?
31:13
Cassandra: I'm gonna prove to those 60 rejections.
31:16
Cassandra: I'm gonna get up, I'm gonna do what it is that I I'm feeling led to do.
31:20
Cassandra: As a result of it, you how how did you feel when okay, you've accomplished the journalism, that's you know, the broadcast, and that's what you want to do now, the book.
31:32
Cassandra: How is Lorraine Smith feeling about now?
31:35
Cassandra: What's what's happening with you?
31:37
Lorraine: Overjoyed, thrill, because I didn't think this little baby is going was supposed to take me as far as it's taken me and beyond.
31:47
Lorraine: Um, so I am overjoyed, I am blessed, I am grateful.
31:52
Lorraine: Uh, it's it's just been a truly a blessing, a huge blessing.
31:57
Lorraine: Yeah, that's how I feel.
31:58
Lorraine: I feel grateful, full of gratitude.
32:02
Cassandra: Yeah, I love that because that's what I want my listeners to start feeling, you know, for those who who are not living their best life on their terms, and for those who don't even know what best life looks like, it's time for them to reflect and retrospect what would that look like so they can feel overjoyed.
32:20
Cassandra: Now, one of the things, oh yeah, absolutely, yeah.
32:26
Cassandra: But like you said, still searching, right?
32:28
Cassandra: Yeah, you're still searching.
32:30
Cassandra: So, what's next for you, Lorraine?
32:32
Cassandra: Is it what's next?
32:34
Lorraine: Well, I have I'm working on another book.
32:36
Lorraine: Um, it's gonna be based here in Boston, Cambridge area.
32:39
Lorraine: Two girlfriends, again, because Brenda in the book, she has a a girlfriend that from college who is her lifelong girlfriend, and you know, she you know tells it like it is, but in the next book, it's um two girlfriends here in the Boston Cambridge area.
32:54
Lorraine: Um, and they met at work, and it's kind of like you know, they both have kids, and you know, one's divorced and one's not, and you know, just you know, life, you know, and how these are older um women.
33:08
Lorraine: So, you know, we're gonna, I'm trying to get that aspect because Brenda, she's like in her, you know, we started out when she was a teenager, and then we went through her 20s and her 30s, and this is the 40s, but this particular book is you know much older, they're in their 50s, and you know, they're on the other side, and you know, how do we maneuver that?
33:27
Lorraine: You know, the empty nesters and you know, divorce and that whole that whole aspect of life.
33:34
Cassandra: Okay, is this a sequel?
33:35
Cassandra: No, no, no, not really.
33:38
Cassandra: No.
33:38
Cassandra: Okay.
33:39
Cassandra: That's that's interesting.
33:42
Cassandra: I like that.
33:43
Cassandra: I like that.
33:44
Cassandra: Um, I want to talk one more thing.
33:47
Cassandra: I want to talk about is let's talk about the pauses because we've titled this podcast, A Pause is not a period.
33:57
Cassandra: And as you talk about it, I want you to kind of talk to the listeners that are stuck.
34:03
Cassandra: You know, there's different things they want to do.
34:06
Cassandra: So, what does that pause is not a period thing?
34:09
Lorraine: Well, the pause for me, my pause was having my son and not necessarily pursuing my writing career.
34:18
Lorraine: Okay.
34:18
Lorraine: And and it was something, you know, I think the div the divine order made me pause.
34:26
Lorraine: Um, because I wanted this book to be published, you know, many moons ago.
34:30
Lorraine: But you know, I like I said, I, you know, I had a breakup, you know, I have a son, you know, I I was working at a television station, which was very demanding at the time, and you know, God was like, you have enough on your plate, you know, and I have a plan for you.
34:49
Lorraine: We're gonna put this on pause right now.
34:51
Lorraine: So I just, you know, I said, okay, and went on with my life, raised my wonderful son.
34:58
Lorraine: And, you know, he's now went through college, undergrad, well, high school, undergrad, grad school.
35:05
Lorraine: You know, I worked two jobs, you know, just to make sure.
35:08
Lorraine: Yeah.
35:08
Lorraine: I was working two jobs when I was going through, you know, chemo and radiation.
35:13
Lorraine: Yeah.
35:13
Lorraine: You know, because he was, you know, I just, you know, it's like you have to do what you have to do, you just you persevere.
35:19
Lorraine: Yeah.
35:20
Lorraine: Yes.
35:21
Lorraine: And I want my son to have a better chance and you know, have more and better choices than I did.
35:29
Lorraine: And with you know education, he would have, you know, the chance to do that.
35:35
Lorraine: Yeah.
35:36
Lorraine: So, you know, I made sacrifices.
35:38
Lorraine: This is another thing.
35:39
Lorraine: You know, you will make sacrifices, and I made a lot of sacrifices, you know, for him because I wanted to, and I don't regret it because I would do it again, you know.
35:49
Lorraine: So that was my pause.
35:51
Lorraine: My pause was to concentrate on my son and for him to be the best young man that he could be.
35:56
Lorraine: So now that he's you know finished with all his education, he has a wonderful job.
36:00
Lorraine: He recently got married last year to a wonderful young lady.
36:03
Lorraine: So, you know, it was my time.
36:05
Lorraine: Before it wasn't my time, it was his time.
36:08
Lorraine: So that was my pause to concentrate on him.
36:11
Lorraine: Yeah.
36:12
Lorraine: And now it's my time.
36:13
Lorraine: I'm an empty nester now, you know.
36:15
Lorraine: So it's like I'm 65, and it's, you know, my books published, and you know, things are wonderful.
36:25
Lorraine: If this would have happened back then, I don't think it would have been as sweet as it is now.
36:31
Lorraine: You know, it's just so sweet.
36:35
Lorraine: Yeah, yeah, it's so wonderful.
36:37
Lorraine: And yeah, things are just happening.
36:39
Lorraine: It's like, you know, it seems like every day there's a blessing because of you know, still searching, and I don't necessarily know that this would have happened you know, 10 plus years ago.
36:49
Cassandra: So well, Lorraine Smith, you have done well.
36:51
Cassandra: Thank you.
36:52
Cassandra: Congratulations, and and I know that this is not the end.
36:58
Lorraine: Thank you, thank you.
36:59
Cassandra: Yes, and yeah, go ahead.
37:01
Lorraine: I just want to um leave saying to the listeners, never give up, persevere, it's not gonna be easy.
37:10
Lorraine: Anything easy, I find is not worthwhile.
37:12
Lorraine: Right.
37:13
Lorraine: Yeah, there's this, you know, it's so just never give up.
37:17
Lorraine: If you have a dream, a passion, yeah, follow it to the end.
37:22
Lorraine: Yes, there's you know, there's uh there's a rainbow at the end, you know, like in the Oz.
37:28
Lorraine: There's there's there's a rainbow there and at the end of Oz.
37:31
Lorraine: So it's it's not easy, it's tough, and you know, but it's worth it.
37:36
Lorraine: If it's if it's what you truly want to do and it's your passion, go for it.
37:41
Cassandra: Yeah, great.
37:42
Cassandra: Now tell my listeners how they can get your book.
37:45
Lorraine: Um I you can it's on Amazon, uh, you know, all the platforms online, and starting next month, it will be in the Barnes and Nobles.
37:58
Lorraine: It will be in, you know, all re the majority of the retail stores, the targets, the um that's awesome the Costco's, the yeah.
38:06
Lorraine: And also in the libraries.
38:10
Lorraine: And I'm you could reach me on you know, at Lorraine at Lorraine Ophelia Smith on Instagram, um, I'm on Facebook, Lorraine Smith, um X, same thing, Lorraine Ophelia Smith.
38:24
Lorraine: Sure.
38:25
Lorraine: So um, yeah, so I'm all over the place.
38:28
Cassandra: Awesome.
38:28
Cassandra: And you know what?
38:29
Cassandra: If you would have self-published it, it would not have been all over the place.
38:33
Cassandra: So because you use the traditional um publisher, that's why, because what happens is if they don't sell all the books, they want you to take them back.
38:43
Cassandra: Yeah, you wouldn't be able to take them back.
38:45
Cassandra: So everything that you did was not only purposeful, but I think it was ordained.
38:50
Cassandra: And yeah, and I just want to thank you um for being my guest today.
38:56
Cassandra: You were wonderful, and you are the epitome, proof that it is never too late to step into your best life.
39:05
Lorraine: Exactly, exactly.
39:06
Lorraine: I want to thank you so much, Cassandra, because you know, I've been looking forward to this interview for like weeks.
39:10
Lorraine: I'm like, I'm gonna be on Cassandra's broadcast.
39:14
Cassandra: Thank you so much, thank you so much.
39:16
Cassandra: And listeners, I know that this has blessed you, and I ask that you share this, and also you can listen to it over and over and over again, and please show the front of your book one more time.
39:30
Cassandra: I love your cover.
39:33
Cassandra: Still 13.
39:34
Cassandra: Thank you, thank you.
39:34
Cassandra: Still 13 very important, you know.
39:37
Cassandra: So there's her book, ladies or Jenny Jets that are on the on the podcast, listening to the podcast.
39:44
Cassandra: So again, Lorraine, thank you.
39:46
Cassandra: And one of the things I always say to my listeners, I'll say, God bless you.
39:52
Cassandra: I'll say bye for now.
39:54
Cassandra: And Lorraine, you and I are going to stay in touch.
39:58
Lorraine: Yes, I'm coming to Silver Springs and we're gonna do lunch.
40:01
Lorraine: Okay, good, good.
40:03
Cassandra: God bless you and bye for now.
40:06
Lorraine: God bless you, and thank you so much for having me.
40:08
Lorraine: I truly, truly enjoyed speaking with you and your listeners.
40:11
Cassandra: Thank you.
40:12
Cassandra: You are so welcome.