Latest / Classic Metal Show / DID THIS DUMMY GET WHAT HE DESERVED? Football Madness & AI Girlfriend Disaster!

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DID THIS DUMMY GET WHAT HE DESERVED? Football Madness & AI Girlfriend Disaster! · Classic Metal Show

• 0:01
  SPEAKER_02: Hi, this is August Nielsen,
• 0:03
  SPEAKER_01: Glam from Wigwam, you're listening to and watching CMS TV.
• 0:18
  SPEAKER_03: From the Hall of the Mountain King release, that is Sabotage with 24 Hours to Go.
• 0:23
  SPEAKER_03: That one going out by request to the Hardy Boy.
• 0:28
  SPEAKER_03: Just before that, we heard Wasp with the Manimal.
• 0:32
  SPEAKER_03: That's for George from Sydney.
• 0:34
  SPEAKER_03: Dirty Honey, brand new stuff in there with Lights Out for John Phillips.
• 0:39
  SPEAKER_03: Billy Squire, the Big Beat for Ben Benjamin.
• 0:45
  SPEAKER_03: Aerosmith with Back in the Saddle for Jackal.
• 0:48
  SPEAKER_03: Kicking off that block.
• 0:50
  SPEAKER_00: There we go.
• 0:52
  SPEAKER_03: Yep.
• 0:52
  SPEAKER_03: So there you are.
• 0:53
  SPEAKER_03: Some interesting picks there.
• 0:56
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 0:57
  SPEAKER_03: There's some criticisms of the Sabotage song being played.
• 1:02
  SPEAKER_01: But it's a request.
• 1:05
  SPEAKER_01: It's a request.
• 1:06
  SPEAKER_01: What do you want me to do?
• 1:07
  SPEAKER_01: Dude, do you always got to play that Sabotage song?
• 1:11
  SPEAKER_01: What the fuck?
• 1:14
  SPEAKER_03: Well, Hardy Boy, you're in the line of fire.
• 1:17
  SPEAKER_03: I'm just the lowly DJ guy who plays your requests because you paid us a fucking quarter.
• 1:24
  SPEAKER_00: Dude, you never play anything from Streets of Magellan,
• 1:28
  SPEAKER_00: but the far wake of Magellan, you don't play any of it.
• 1:33
  SPEAKER_00: You're not really a true fan.
• 1:35
  SPEAKER_00: You're a poser.
• 1:37
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, man.
• 1:38
  SPEAKER_01: You just picked the most popular tracks.
• 1:40
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 1:41
  SPEAKER_01: What's next?
• 1:42
  SPEAKER_01: All of the Mountain King faggot.
• 1:50
  SPEAKER_03: I'm with Jim Florentine about the people who leave Yelp reviews.
• 1:55
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 1:55
  SPEAKER_00: Fuck them.
• 1:56
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 1:58
  SPEAKER_01: I hate you cunts.
• 1:59
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 2:00
  SPEAKER_01: Fuck them.
• 2:00
  SPEAKER_01: They don't matter.
• 2:01
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 2:03
  SPEAKER_01: All right.
• 2:04
  SPEAKER_03: Well, we got about 40 minutes to go.
• 2:07
  SPEAKER_03: Yes.
• 2:08
  SPEAKER_03: So do you want to just do some fun stuff?
• 2:12
  SPEAKER_03: We can.
• 2:15
  SPEAKER_00: Well, I had the thing that was going to cover what I put on the thing, but it doesn't matter.
• 2:21
  SPEAKER_00: No, no, you can go ahead.
• 2:22
  SPEAKER_00: If you've got funnier stuff, this is not funny.
• 2:25
  SPEAKER_00: This is just kind of, I have no problem changing the graphic.
• 2:30
  SPEAKER_00: It doesn't matter.
• 2:31
  SPEAKER_03: All right.
• 2:32
  SPEAKER_00: Go with your stuff.
• 2:34
  SPEAKER_00: I don't think we want to go through a list of 10 bands that should retire, do we?
• 2:39
  SPEAKER_03: No.
• 2:40
  SPEAKER_03: I think that horse has been beaten to death on the internet.
• 2:44
  SPEAKER_00: I know, but I'm going for clicks, man.
• 2:48
  SPEAKER_01: All right.
• 2:49
  SPEAKER_00: Not really.
• 2:50
  SPEAKER_00: That's why I'm like, fuck it, just change it.
• 2:52
  SPEAKER_00: It's fine.
• 2:53
  SPEAKER_00: I don't care.
• 2:53
  SPEAKER_03: Well, a couple of these things came from suggestions from CMS fans.
• 2:58
  SPEAKER_00: Okay.
• 2:59
  SPEAKER_03: And they might be worthy.
• 3:01
  SPEAKER_00: All right.
• 3:02
  SPEAKER_03: So Four Heady Trunks sends in this video, I guess.
• 3:08
  SPEAKER_00: Okay.
• 3:11
  SPEAKER_03: A husband is accused of taping his wife to a chair to watch football.
• 3:18
  SPEAKER_00: I heard about this story.
• 3:19
  SPEAKER_00: I thought it was bullshit, but apparently it's not, huh?
• 3:24
  SPEAKER_03: It's actually made the news.
• 3:26
  SPEAKER_03: I'm going to shoot you over the link because there's an actual video.
• 3:31
  SPEAKER_00: Okay.
• 3:32
  SPEAKER_03: Of, I guess, the guy being in a jumpsuit, like a jail suit.
• 3:43
  SPEAKER_03: For taping his wife to a chair so he could watch football.
• 3:47
  SPEAKER_00: At least the reason was good.
• 3:51
  SPEAKER_03: Well, Four Heady Trunk thought this would be a good subject because you're
• 3:57
  SPEAKER_03: a big football fan, a big Browns fan.
• 4:00
  SPEAKER_01: Was she running her yap?
• 4:02
  SPEAKER_01: Probably.
• 4:04
  SPEAKER_01: Not guilty.
• 4:08
  SPEAKER_01: He's not guilty, that is.
• 4:09
  SPEAKER_00: He's not guilty.
• 4:13
  SPEAKER_03: But Foreheady Trunk goes on to say, let me see here.
• 4:17
  SPEAKER_03: He sent me kind of a detailed email here.
• 4:24
  SPEAKER_03: Let's see here.
• 4:26
  SPEAKER_03: Between Chris's ex-wife and your troublesome exes,
• 4:31
  SPEAKER_03: I thought the two of you could relate to this guy.
• 4:33
  SPEAKER_03: I don't know if I'll be able to catch a show, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
• 4:39
  SPEAKER_03: Let's see.
• 4:39
  SPEAKER_03: Anyway, hopefully I'll be able to catch the Halloween edition of the CMS on the following
• 4:44
  SPEAKER_00: week.
• 4:46
  SPEAKER_00: The link did not come through on this thing.
• 4:48
  SPEAKER_03: Didn't come through?
• 4:49
  SPEAKER_00: Nope.
• 4:50
  SPEAKER_00: The email did, but the link did not.
• 4:52
  SPEAKER_03: Huh.
• 4:53
  SPEAKER_03: All right.
• 4:57
  SPEAKER_03: Let me see.
• 4:58
  SPEAKER_03: I'm going to copy this link and I'm going to send it in a separate email.
• 5:06
  SPEAKER_00: All right.
• 5:07
  SPEAKER_03: Copy, compose, Chris.
• 5:16
  SPEAKER_03: I'm trying to do this on the fly real quick.
• 5:20
  SPEAKER_03: And football.
• 5:26
  SPEAKER_03: And I'm going to send.
• 5:29
  SPEAKER_03: Just send it again.
• 5:30
  SPEAKER_03: So hopefully you'll get this.
• 5:32
  SPEAKER_03: But anyway,
• 5:33
  SPEAKER_03: some guy wants to watch football and peace on a Sunday
• 5:36
  SPEAKER_03: and his wife just won't let him.
• 5:39
  SPEAKER_03: So he just taped her to a chair and said, I'm watching football, bitch.
• 5:45
  SPEAKER_00: Okay.
• 5:48
  SPEAKER_00: Like, all right, fine.
• 5:50
  SPEAKER_01: Did you get it?
• 5:51
  SPEAKER_01: I got it.
• 5:52
  SPEAKER_03: Okay.
• 5:52
  SPEAKER_03: Okay.
• 5:56
  SPEAKER_03: Let's see what the story is here.
• 6:00
  SPEAKER_03: There you go.
• 6:00
  SPEAKER_03: Husband accused of taping his wife to a chair to watch football.
• 6:05
  SPEAKER_03: That's a good plan.
• 6:06
  SPEAKER_03: All right, let's see.
• 6:07
  SPEAKER_03: So this guy just wants to watch a game.
• 6:10
  SPEAKER_03: Who can blame him?
• 6:12
  SPEAKER_03: As opposed to going to Home Depot to pick
• 6:15
  SPEAKER_01: up, what, mulching and shit?
• 6:18
  SPEAKER_01: Mulching, yeah, you got to get the lawn ready for the winter.
• 6:22
  SPEAKER_01: And it's like, I just want to watch football.
• 6:25
  SPEAKER_01: Leave me alone.
• 6:26
  SPEAKER_00: He's probably sitting home.
• 6:28
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know.
• 6:28
  SPEAKER_00: Where's this guy from?
• 6:29
  SPEAKER_00: Virginia?
• 6:30
  SPEAKER_03: Virginia.
• 6:31
  SPEAKER_00: He's probably like, I just want to watch the fucking Commanders.
• 6:36
  SPEAKER_03: I'm surprised you actually let that come out of your mouth.
• 6:39
  SPEAKER_00: Well, you know, I'm trying to.
• 6:41
  SPEAKER_00: It's the new me.
• 6:45
  SPEAKER_03: You've evolved as a male, as Jim Florentine says.
• 6:50
  SPEAKER_00: Believe me, when Jim sees this replay, I'll get a text.
• 6:54
  SPEAKER_00: You actually said commanders.
• 6:56
  SPEAKER_00: No, it won't.
• 6:57
  SPEAKER_00: It'll have two words.
• 6:58
  SPEAKER_00: It'll have commanders.
• 6:59
  SPEAKER_00: All right, here we go.
• 7:08
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe.
• 7:08
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe.
• 7:12
  SPEAKER_02: What artist painted those fucking eyelashes?
• 7:14
  SPEAKER_02: How about this?
• 7:15
  SPEAKER_02: She, as a female broadcaster, a stress-free Sunday afternoon watching football.
• 7:22
  SPEAKER_00: So what is she just admitting to?
• 7:41
  SPEAKER_01: Women are fucking a pain in the ass.
• 7:43
  SPEAKER_01: They're a pain in the ass, stress free.
• 7:48
  SPEAKER_00: Look at those eyelashes.
• 7:50
  SPEAKER_03: I see that.
• 7:53
  SPEAKER_00: Those are a fucking Picasso, not anything human.
• 7:58
  SPEAKER_03: She looks like she's like one taco away from just tipping the scales.
• 8:02
  SPEAKER_00: What are you talking about?
• 8:03
  SPEAKER_00: She's three tacos away from lunch.
• 8:09
  SPEAKER_01: She's about ready for, what, second lunch or whatever.
• 8:14
  SPEAKER_01: She's got the fill.
• 8:16
  SPEAKER_03: I've been filling out a little bit.
• 8:19
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, to get somebody as big as a linebacker to do a story
• 8:22
  SPEAKER_00: about this guy watching linebackers, apparently.
• 8:24
  SPEAKER_03: Right, right.
• 8:25
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, she's a thick one.
• 8:27
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 8:28
  SPEAKER_00: My goodness.
• 8:30
  SPEAKER_03: She's a thick one.
• 8:32
  SPEAKER_01: She is a thick one.
• 8:33
  SPEAKER_01: I agree with you.
• 8:36
  SPEAKER_01: Is that a bad way to say it?
• 8:37
  SPEAKER_01: No, I'm just saying that
• 8:39
  SPEAKER_03: she's getting close to... She better just lay off the... Everything.
• 8:48
  SPEAKER_00: All right, let's see what Chubbsy has to say here.
• 8:57
  SPEAKER_00: Here we go.
• 8:59
  SPEAKER_02: He
• 9:02
  SPEAKER_02: was arrested and charged for allegedly taping his wife to a chair in the basement
• 9:07
  SPEAKER_02: so he could watch the games and what he said was peace.
• 9:12
  SPEAKER_02: Thanks for coming on to talk about this.
• 9:14
  SPEAKER_02: What happened here?
• 9:15
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, any time, Katie.
• 9:16
  SPEAKER_02: And these are some of the most bizarre stories that I tell you,
• 9:19
  SPEAKER_02: and this is certainly one of them.
• 9:21
  SPEAKER_02: A Virginia man that you mentioned,
• 9:23
  SPEAKER_02: Terry Ward,
• 9:24
  SPEAKER_02: he just wanted to watch the game in peace, but allegedly that took a very
• 9:32
  SPEAKER_00: I'm not even listening to this story.
• 9:34
  SPEAKER_01: I can't stop watching these people.
• 9:38
  SPEAKER_01: He allegedly wanted to watch the game in peace.
• 9:44
  SPEAKER_00: Meanwhile, you got this fucking used to be a guy telling the story.
• 9:49
  SPEAKER_00: Jeez.
• 9:53
  SPEAKER_00: It's ma'am.
• 9:58
  SPEAKER_01: Holy cow.
• 10:00
  SPEAKER_03: Here's what I want to know.
• 10:02
  SPEAKER_03: I'm trying to picture the scenario here.
• 10:07
  SPEAKER_03: Number one, how did he get his wife down to the basement?
• 10:13
  SPEAKER_03: Was she already down there doing laundry or something,
• 10:16
  SPEAKER_03: and he just grabbed her and threw her into a chair and started duct-taping her?
• 10:21
  SPEAKER_03: No way.
• 10:22
  SPEAKER_03: How did this even occur if it actually occurred?
• 10:24
  SPEAKER_03: I got the answer.
• 10:25
  SPEAKER_03: I have the answer.
• 10:26
  SPEAKER_00: All right.
• 10:29
  SPEAKER_00: He went with one of these, I got to show you a trick.
• 10:31
  SPEAKER_00: I want to play a game.
• 10:34
  SPEAKER_00: Let me show you something.
• 10:36
  SPEAKER_00: This started with the wife saying,
• 10:40
  SPEAKER_00: we got to be over at Katie's at 2 o'clock for the baby shower or some bullshit.
• 10:46
  SPEAKER_00: Some bullshit that he clearly doesn't want to be dealing with, right?
• 10:50
  SPEAKER_00: Sure.
• 10:52
  SPEAKER_00: And...
• 10:56
  SPEAKER_00: He gets her and he's like, oh, I got to show you this.
• 10:57
  SPEAKER_00: I got to show you this.
• 10:59
  SPEAKER_00: And he goes to show her this and it's just this.
• 11:02
  SPEAKER_03: Well, what do you think the show her this is?
• 11:06
  SPEAKER_03: Sit down.
• 11:06
  SPEAKER_00: I'm going to show you a trick.
• 11:08
  SPEAKER_00: It's like the way John Wayne Gacy hooked up to all his rape victims.
• 11:13
  SPEAKER_00: I'm going to show you a trick with handcuffs.
• 11:16
  SPEAKER_00: You know what the trick is?
• 11:16
  SPEAKER_00: Having the key.
• 11:18
  SPEAKER_00: You're fucked.
• 11:20
  SPEAKER_00: So I'm sure he taped her down and then just left.
• 11:22
  SPEAKER_00: And she's probably screaming
• 11:24
  SPEAKER_01: up the stairs.
• 11:25
  SPEAKER_01: I just want to figure out how in the hell,
• 11:28
  SPEAKER_03: you know, he just, you know, had a, I'm assuming it was like duct tape.
• 11:35
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 11:35
  SPEAKER_03: You know, something strong.
• 11:38
  SPEAKER_03: So he had a roll of duct tape just like hidden and handy and just started taping her
• 11:45
  SPEAKER_03: into a chair.
• 11:46
  SPEAKER_01: He might have.
• 11:50
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, what makes any more sense than that?
• 11:54
  SPEAKER_03: You know, again, I'm trying to just picture the scenario.
• 12:00
  SPEAKER_03: Voila, a roll of
• 12:01
  SPEAKER_01: duct tape.
• 12:04
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I mean, I have to think that he tricked her into doing it.
• 12:11
  SPEAKER_01: Well,
• 12:11
  SPEAKER_01: he would have had to.
• 12:13
  SPEAKER_01: I don't think he beat her into doing it.
• 12:16
  SPEAKER_01: So he just,
• 12:17
  SPEAKER_01: out of nowhere,
• 12:18
  SPEAKER_01: he just
• 12:19
  SPEAKER_03: produced a roll of duct tape and went,
• 12:22
  SPEAKER_00: Might have had it sitting right next to the, yeah.
• 12:25
  SPEAKER_00: He might have just had it sitting right there.
• 12:28
  SPEAKER_00: Or again,
• 12:28
  SPEAKER_00: if he said he was going to show her a magic trick or something,
• 12:31
  SPEAKER_00: he could have the tape.
• 12:32
  SPEAKER_00: He taped her up and goes, watch this.
• 12:34
  SPEAKER_00: Now I'm going to disappear, bitch.
• 12:37
  SPEAKER_00: I'm out of here.
• 12:39
  SPEAKER_01: So he had just a roll of duct tape just hanging around.
• 12:42
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 12:44
  SPEAKER_01: Watch this.
• 12:45
  SPEAKER_01: Watch me disappear up the stairs.
• 12:47
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I'm going to go up and watch my flat screen and I'm going to watch
• 12:50
  SPEAKER_03: my,
• 12:52
  SPEAKER_03: as you said, the commanders.
• 12:55
  SPEAKER_00: Watch me close the cellar door.
• 13:00
  SPEAKER_00: Dumb bitch.
• 13:02
  SPEAKER_00: All right, let's see what this guy has to say about this guy.
• 13:04
  SPEAKER_01: All right.
• 13:07
  SPEAKER_02: AI is just stealing from artists and eventually replacing musicians altogether.
• 13:12
  SPEAKER_02: This episode of The Cut is only available to VIP subscribers on Locals.
• 13:22
  SPEAKER_02: Disturbing turn very quickly.
• 13:23
  SPEAKER_02: You're taking a look at his mugshot.
• 13:25
  SPEAKER_02: Police were called to a Richmond home around 1130 Sunday night.
• 13:29
  SPEAKER_02: Prime football watching.
• 13:31
  SPEAKER_02: October 11th, it happened.
• 13:33
  SPEAKER_02: But when police arrived, it was for a domestic disturbance.
• 13:36
  SPEAKER_02: Virginia's That seems alright.
• 13:37
  SPEAKER_02: What's wrong with that?
• 13:38
  SPEAKER_02: So he left there for 30 to 45 minutes just so he could enjoy a little bit
• 13:41
  SPEAKER_02: of football and a beer?
• 14:07
  SPEAKER_00: Dude, this so reminds me,
• 14:08
  SPEAKER_00: you remember the episode of Sons of Anarchy where they had the girl taped to
• 14:14
  SPEAKER_00: the wheelchair in the basement?
• 14:16
  SPEAKER_00: Yes.
• 14:17
  SPEAKER_00: They brought Stephen King in.
• 14:18
  SPEAKER_00: Yes.
• 14:19
  SPEAKER_00: Stephen King's like, I want music.
• 14:23
  SPEAKER_00: 80s hair metal.
• 14:26
  SPEAKER_00: This guy, I want football.
• 14:29
  SPEAKER_03: This just reminds me of Guns N' Roses.
• 14:32
  SPEAKER_03: I used to love her.
• 14:35
  SPEAKER_03: But I had to tape her.
• 14:37
  SPEAKER_03: No, she bitched so much, she drove me nuts.
• 14:43
  SPEAKER_00: And now she's taped down to the chair.
• 14:51
  SPEAKER_03: I could not imagine living in a house, and you are a prime example.
• 14:58
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I did live
• 14:59
  SPEAKER_00: in this house.
• 14:59
  SPEAKER_00: What are you talking about?
• 15:00
  SPEAKER_03: Living in a house with a woman that just drove you nuts.
• 15:04
  SPEAKER_03: Dude.
• 15:05
  SPEAKER_00: You know how bad it is when you want to really stretch out and watch fucking,
• 15:10
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know, Law & Order, and instead you're getting a four-hour marathon of T.D.
• 15:15
  SPEAKER_00: Jakes?
• 15:16
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, my God.
• 15:17
  SPEAKER_00: That is fucking awful.
• 15:20
  SPEAKER_00: Want to know why I'm so fucked up, people?
• 15:22
  SPEAKER_00: That's why.
• 15:24
  SPEAKER_00: I literally locked myself in with a lunatic for fucking 23 years.
• 15:28
  SPEAKER_03: You lived in the lunatic fringe like Red Ryder.
• 15:32
  SPEAKER_00: I really did.
• 15:34
  SPEAKER_00: There was many a day that I wished I would die.
• 15:36
  SPEAKER_00: And that's not even a lie.
• 15:40
  SPEAKER_00: There was many a day that me and her would have an argument and I would just leave
• 15:45
  SPEAKER_00: the room or whatever.
• 15:46
  SPEAKER_00: So I didn't beat her up.
• 15:48
  SPEAKER_00: And I literally would think there's a lot of times I just took off in the car
• 15:52
  SPEAKER_00: and I was like, I am going to just drive right off that fucking bridge.
• 15:56
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 15:56
  SPEAKER_03: You were like, you were the simple man from, uh, Junk guard.
• 16:01
  SPEAKER_03: Yes.
• 16:01
  SPEAKER_03: I grabbed my pack of cigarettes and my keys and I drove off into the night.
• 16:06
  SPEAKER_00: Yes.
• 16:07
  SPEAKER_00: I wanted,
• 16:08
  SPEAKER_00: I wanted to be like that McKenzie,
• 16:10
  SPEAKER_00: whatever her name,
• 16:11
  SPEAKER_00: McKenzie Schirrilla and just go a thousand miles an hour into a wall.
• 16:15
  SPEAKER_00: Just be dead.
• 16:19
  SPEAKER_00: I don't see anything wrong with this, to be honest.
• 16:21
  SPEAKER_00: Not guilty.
• 16:25
  SPEAKER_00: Not guilty.
• 16:28
  SPEAKER_03: Well, here's the funny thing.
• 16:31
  SPEAKER_03: The police were called at 1130 at night.
• 16:36
  SPEAKER_03: Football is over at what time?
• 16:38
  SPEAKER_00: No, right around then.
• 16:40
  SPEAKER_00: Is it?
• 16:40
  SPEAKER_00: It's over by then?
• 16:41
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, because the eight game starts at, I think, 820.
• 16:45
  SPEAKER_00: So when do you think he taped her up?
• 16:47
  SPEAKER_00: 815.
• 16:49
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, no, they said 45 minutes?
• 16:52
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, 30 to 45 minutes.
• 16:57
  SPEAKER_00: I'm trying to, I wish I knew what game it was because we could look it up.
• 17:00
  SPEAKER_00: I wonder if it was like a really close game and she was being a total cunt.
• 17:07
  SPEAKER_00: Come to bed, come to bed.
• 17:11
  SPEAKER_01: I can't sleep when you're yelling at the TV watching the football.
• 17:15
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, you fucking dicks.
• 17:17
  SPEAKER_01: You should have went for the two points.
• 17:20
  SPEAKER_00: And meanwhile, the game's like 27-24 or something.
• 17:24
  SPEAKER_00: You know,
• 17:24
  SPEAKER_00: it's like one of those games and she's like,
• 17:26
  SPEAKER_00: if you don't come to bed,
• 17:28
  SPEAKER_00: I'm just not going to fucking suck your dick this week or whatever
• 17:31
  SPEAKER_00: the fuck
• 17:32
  SPEAKER_01: she says.
• 17:32
  SPEAKER_01: You think this girl who's taken to a chair
• 17:36
  SPEAKER_03: is ever going to suck his dick?
• 17:37
  SPEAKER_03: Are you kidding me?
• 17:38
  SPEAKER_01: That's probably a good point.
• 17:40
  SPEAKER_01: You know, pretend he has a dick maybe.
• 17:42
  SPEAKER_03: That didn't even happen the last time she was 16 in the back of his car.
• 17:49
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, that's true.
• 17:50
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, if she was sucking his dick on the regular, he wouldn't be taping her up.
• 17:55
  SPEAKER_00: You'd have a reason to go to bed?
• 17:58
  SPEAKER_00: There is truth to that.
• 18:00
  SPEAKER_00: All right.
• 18:01
  SPEAKER_00: Let's see what we got here.
• 18:02
  SPEAKER_02: Officers saw marks and tape residue all over her arms.
• 18:07
  SPEAKER_02: It also says the man admitted to tying his wife to a chair and placing her in the basement.
• 18:13
  SPEAKER_02: He never denied it.
• 18:14
  SPEAKER_02: Now, the claim that he went upstairs to watch football while she was restrained,
• 18:17
  SPEAKER_02: that also comes from that report.
• 18:19
  SPEAKER_02: Now, Terry Ward is charged with felony abduction and misdemeanor assault on a family member.
• 18:24
  SPEAKER_02: We should mention he has not been found guilty,
• 18:26
  SPEAKER_02: but his next court appearance, that is scheduled for November 10th.
• 18:32
  SPEAKER_00: How is that a misdemeanor?
• 18:34
  SPEAKER_00: It's the same as stealing a pack of gum at a fucking grocery store.
• 18:44
  SPEAKER_00: Wow.
• 18:47
  SPEAKER_00: Felony abduction charges, though, that's going to be a killer.
• 18:51
  SPEAKER_01: Right.
• 18:52
  SPEAKER_00: Here's the real question,
• 18:53
  SPEAKER_00: and only because it's very clear that this guy is just a henpecked husband
• 18:58
  SPEAKER_00: that snapped.
• 18:59
  SPEAKER_01: Yes.
• 18:59
  SPEAKER_01: Yes.
• 19:00
  SPEAKER_00: They get back together, right?
• 19:02
  SPEAKER_00: Of course.
• 19:04
  SPEAKER_00: That's how he convinces her to drop the charges.
• 19:09
  SPEAKER_00: I won't watch football anymore, babe.
• 19:11
  SPEAKER_00: I won't.
• 19:12
  SPEAKER_00: Just drop the charges.
• 19:13
  SPEAKER_00: We'll start over.
• 19:14
  SPEAKER_00: I'll get counseling.
• 19:16
  SPEAKER_00: Sure.
• 19:17
  SPEAKER_00: I'll get football taping you to the chair counseling.
• 19:20
  SPEAKER_00: Just find me the counselor.
• 19:22
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 19:24
  SPEAKER_00: You know that's how this ends.
• 19:27
  SPEAKER_00: This ends with this fucking guy.
• 19:29
  SPEAKER_00: Being miserable for another 10 years.
• 19:32
  SPEAKER_03: Well, he looks kind of like a real passive looking guy.
• 19:35
  SPEAKER_00: He's a pussy.
• 19:36
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 19:37
  SPEAKER_03: Well, he was almost relieved that he could go to jail to actually get a good night's sleep.
• 19:44
  SPEAKER_00: You know,
• 19:45
  SPEAKER_00: he was sitting up on his couch hearing this bitch yelling in the basement,
• 19:48
  SPEAKER_00: let me up, sipping that beer like he was a goddamn king.
• 19:53
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 19:53
  SPEAKER_00: He's like,
• 19:57
  SPEAKER_03: I'm going to have to let her go at some point.
• 20:00
  SPEAKER_00: That bitch ain't stopping this fucking TD drive now, is she?
• 20:03
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 20:04
  SPEAKER_03: Fuck her.
• 20:05
  SPEAKER_03: I'm going to watch the end of this game, then I'll let her loose.
• 20:08
  SPEAKER_03: And then the minute he let her loose, she ran for the cell phone.
• 20:12
  SPEAKER_03: Ran right to the phone.
• 20:15
  SPEAKER_01: He tied me up.
• 20:16
  SPEAKER_01: He tied me up.
• 20:18
  SPEAKER_00: Took pictures of her arm, put them right on Instagram.
• 20:21
  SPEAKER_01: Look what he did to me.
• 20:23
  SPEAKER_01: I got tape residue on my skin.
• 20:28
  SPEAKER_01: And I got to post it to Twitter.
• 20:30
  SPEAKER_00: All right, let's go back to it.
• 20:35
  SPEAKER_00: Look at how ugly these two women are.
• 20:38
  SPEAKER_00: How are they fucking newscasters?
• 20:40
  SPEAKER_03: I know, they are like monster chicks.
• 20:44
  SPEAKER_00: You got the linebacker on the left and you got this lady
• 20:47
  SPEAKER_00: that bought her fucking clothes at an Amish fair.
• 20:51
  SPEAKER_00: Look at that outfit she's wearing.
• 20:57
  SPEAKER_00: Looks like she should be out back building a barn or something, not fucking reading news.
• 21:04
  SPEAKER_03: Who shot the couch?
• 21:11
  SPEAKER_00: Jesus Christ.
• 21:13
  SPEAKER_00: All right, here we go.
• 21:15
  SPEAKER_02: We'll see how that plays out.
• 21:16
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, it sounds like she may have been injured.
• 21:18
  SPEAKER_02: This is terrible.
• 21:21
  SPEAKER_02: Hopefully this was the first case and that she gets out of that awful situation.
• 21:24
  SPEAKER_00: She just thinks it's terrible because she would have broke through the tape
• 21:27
  SPEAKER_00: with her fucking massive arms.
• 21:33
  SPEAKER_00: There's no duct tape can hold me down.
• 21:35
  SPEAKER_00: All right, here we go.
• 21:42
  SPEAKER_02: Seems like being a fan has certainly gone too far in this case.
• 21:45
  SPEAKER_03: Has it gone too far?
• 21:48
  SPEAKER_03: Is it the fandom?
• 21:50
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, is that
• 21:51
  SPEAKER_00: what it was?
• 21:51
  SPEAKER_00: The fandom?
• 21:55
  SPEAKER_00: Did he have his pendant and he was waving it around to the cops?
• 22:02
  SPEAKER_01: Holy shit.
• 22:04
  SPEAKER_01: Wow.
• 22:05
  SPEAKER_01: The fandom has gone too far.
• 22:07
  SPEAKER_00: The fandom has gone too far.
• 22:10
  SPEAKER_00: Not the fact that he fucking taped his wife down to a fucking chair and left her.
• 22:15
  SPEAKER_03: Because she drives him crazy.
• 22:17
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, because she is a first class cunt.
• 22:21
  SPEAKER_00: That is why this is happening.
• 22:23
  SPEAKER_03: Oh my God.
• 22:24
  SPEAKER_00: Because I guarantee you, this does not happen to an otherwise good wife.
• 22:29
  SPEAKER_00: Does it?
• 22:30
  SPEAKER_00: No.
• 22:32
  SPEAKER_00: This does not happen to that wife that's This happens to resting bitchface wife.
• 22:45
  SPEAKER_03: That's who gets taped to
• 22:46
  SPEAKER_00: chairs.
• 22:47
  SPEAKER_03: This guy just wanted to have a peaceful Sunday and just watch some football on TV and whatever.
• 22:54
  SPEAKER_03: And he was just like, you know what?
• 22:56
  SPEAKER_03: I have had enough of this.
• 22:59
  SPEAKER_03: Every time I sit down on this couch and turn on the TV and I want to watch a game,
• 23:04
  SPEAKER_03: she's always up in my grill about some fucking bullshit.
• 23:09
  SPEAKER_03: I'm not going to do it this Sunday.
• 23:10
  SPEAKER_03: This Sunday is a game that I want to watch, and I'm not going to listen to her carry on.
• 23:17
  SPEAKER_00: Why do I think,
• 23:19
  SPEAKER_00: and I don't know the answer to this,
• 23:21
  SPEAKER_00: why I think this guy might have had tickets to the game and had to pass because
• 23:25
  SPEAKER_00: the wife was a bitch.
• 23:30
  SPEAKER_00: So then he was like, well, I'm going to watch it.
• 23:31
  SPEAKER_00: She's like, you're not watching that game either.
• 23:35
  SPEAKER_00: You need to spend your time with me.
• 23:38
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 23:39
  SPEAKER_00: I know that's what happened.
• 23:41
  SPEAKER_00: I look at this guy.
• 23:43
  SPEAKER_00: I moved it back to showing this guy for a reason.
• 23:45
  SPEAKER_00: I know.
• 23:46
  SPEAKER_00: Most times when you see a prison photo...
• 23:50
  SPEAKER_00: Or a jail photo?
• 23:51
  SPEAKER_00: They look sad.
• 23:53
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, but he's relieved.
• 23:53
  SPEAKER_00: This guy looks completely at peace.
• 23:56
  SPEAKER_01: He looks relieved.
• 23:58
  SPEAKER_01: He's like, this is going to be a fucking peaceful night.
• 24:00
  SPEAKER_01: I'm going to be able to sleep
• 24:02
  SPEAKER_03: in a cot tonight.
• 24:03
  SPEAKER_03: I know it's not the most comfortable cot,
• 24:06
  SPEAKER_03: but God damn it, I'm not going to listen to a bitching wife.
• 24:09
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I won't have to hear her crowing in my ear about what an asshole I am.
• 24:18
  SPEAKER_00: Good for him.
• 24:21
  SPEAKER_00: That's why you get, sometimes it's worth the jail.
• 24:23
  SPEAKER_00: Oh my God.
• 24:25
  SPEAKER_00: Sometimes it's worth the jail.
• 24:28
  SPEAKER_00: I'll make no bones about that.
• 24:31
  SPEAKER_00: Wait, here we go.
• 24:33
  SPEAKER_02: That's the thing, right?
• 24:34
  SPEAKER_02: We want to laugh about it, but we want to- No,
• 24:36
  SPEAKER_00: we're laughing about
• 24:37
  SPEAKER_02: it.
• 24:37
  SPEAKER_01: We're definitely laughing about it.
• 24:40
  SPEAKER_01: We're laughing about it on this goddamn show.
• 24:43
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, we're laughing about it.
• 24:46
  SPEAKER_00: You're saying you want to laugh about it.
• 24:48
  SPEAKER_00: When was the last time you saw any electronic- Amish, bitch.
• 24:52
  SPEAKER_00: Shut up.
• 24:55
  SPEAKER_02: More about this man's history, and we're all digging to find that out.
• 24:58
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, a lot of men and women want to enjoy their game in peace.
• 25:01
  SPEAKER_02: But, you know, tying your wife or spouse in the basement.
• 25:04
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 25:05
  SPEAKER_02: No, we don't want to do that.
• 25:06
  SPEAKER_02: No.
• 25:07
  SPEAKER_02: All right.
• 25:07
  SPEAKER_02: No, we do want to
• 25:08
  SPEAKER_01: do that.
• 25:09
  SPEAKER_01: Shut the fuck up.
• 25:10
  SPEAKER_01: We're tired of you.
• 25:11
  SPEAKER_01: Shut up.
• 25:11
  SPEAKER_01: You know what?
• 25:12
  SPEAKER_01: You're right.
• 25:12
  SPEAKER_01: We don't want to do that.
• 25:13
  SPEAKER_01: You know what we want to do?
• 25:14
  SPEAKER_01: Watch the fucking game!
• 25:17
  SPEAKER_01: That's what we want to do.
• 25:19
  SPEAKER_01: And bring us some snacks while you're at it.
• 25:21
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 25:24
  SPEAKER_01: Bring some chips before you eat them all, fatty.
• 25:27
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 25:29
  SPEAKER_00: Jesus.
• 25:31
  SPEAKER_03: It's a good thing they have the sister, Mike Webster, you know, bringing this story to us.
• 25:40
  SPEAKER_01: Mike Webster.
• 25:43
  SPEAKER_01: She's got the big ham
• 25:45
  SPEAKER_03: hock arms.
• 25:46
  SPEAKER_03: No shit.
• 25:53
  SPEAKER_00: Here to bring the news, it's Ray Lewis.
• 26:02
  SPEAKER_03: But I agree, that girl with the clickbait, she's got the Amish dress on.
• 26:07
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, that is an awful dress for television.
• 26:11
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, the material doesn't even flow, it's like stiff.
• 26:17
  SPEAKER_00: You know that she takes that off and her whole body looks like it has a rash.
• 26:23
  SPEAKER_01: That's just, it's like wearing a Brillo pad suit.
• 26:25
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, she's wearing like a carpet.
• 26:28
  SPEAKER_01: She's like wearing Berber carpet.
• 26:32
  SPEAKER_00: Somebody was fucking replacing her carpet in her house.
• 26:34
  SPEAKER_00: She just wrapped it around her and went to work.
• 26:38
  SPEAKER_00: Ah, this shit will work.
• 26:44
  SPEAKER_00: Horrible.
• 26:45
  SPEAKER_03: Oh my God.
• 26:47
  SPEAKER_00: Horrible.
• 26:52
  SPEAKER_03: Oof.
• 26:53
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, man.
• 26:54
  SPEAKER_03: All right.
• 26:54
  SPEAKER_03: I got one more story.
• 26:56
  SPEAKER_03: I sent it over to you.
• 26:57
  SPEAKER_03: All right.
• 26:57
  SPEAKER_00: Let's see.
• 26:59
  SPEAKER_03: So a man sells everything and travels 1,200 miles
• 27:06
  SPEAKER_03: to meet his quote-unquote online girlfriend,
• 27:11
  SPEAKER_03: and it doesn't end well when he learns the truth about her.
• 27:16
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, no.
• 27:18
  SPEAKER_00: I don't even want to know.
• 27:21
  SPEAKER_03: Ahem.
• 27:24
  SPEAKER_03: This is just fucking amazing to me.
• 27:27
  SPEAKER_03: Selling everything for love is a big gamble.
• 27:30
  SPEAKER_03: But one Brazilian man took the risk traveling more than 1,200 miles to meet
• 27:36
  SPEAKER_03: a woman he hoped to marry.
• 27:39
  SPEAKER_03: So he never met this supposed chick.
• 27:44
  SPEAKER_03: And he was going to marry her.
• 27:48
  SPEAKER_03: Marry her?
• 27:49
  SPEAKER_03: That's what it says.
• 27:52
  SPEAKER_00: You know what?
• 27:52
  SPEAKER_00: I almost wish he would have gone and got fucking screwed over here.
• 27:55
  SPEAKER_03: Well, he did get screwed over.
• 27:57
  SPEAKER_03: Good, good.
• 27:58
  SPEAKER_03: Unfortunately, the woman he had fallen for wasn't even real.
• 28:05
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 28:08
  SPEAKER_03: Online romance has led people to lose thousands to fake lovers or expect marriages
• 28:16
  SPEAKER_03: before even meeting someone.
• 28:19
  SPEAKER_03: Who does that?
• 28:20
  SPEAKER_03: Mm-hmm.
• 28:22
  SPEAKER_03: You go, you're my life, my love.
• 28:26
  SPEAKER_03: You're my everything.
• 28:27
  SPEAKER_03: I've never met you face to face,
• 28:30
  SPEAKER_03: but I'm willing to just like give up everything that I have just for you.
• 28:34
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 28:35
  SPEAKER_03: Smart.
• 28:38
  Smart.
• 28:39
  SPEAKER_03: But this man's search for love ended with a strange discovery
• 28:44
  SPEAKER_03: and he had already sacrificed almost everything for it.
• 28:47
  SPEAKER_03: According to the New York Post,
• 28:49
  SPEAKER_03: 49-year-old Brazilian bricklayer
• 28:54
  SPEAKER_03: Edamar Martins sold his belongings to travel to,
• 29:00
  SPEAKER_03: I can't even pronounce this place where he went to,
• 29:04
  SPEAKER_03: hoping to meet a woman named Jessica Oliveira.
• 29:09
  SPEAKER_03: All right.
• 29:10
  SPEAKER_03: Instead, he discovered that his dream partner was an AI-generated character.
• 29:20
  SPEAKER_00: So this fucking toolbag probably thought he was covering his bases by doing like
• 29:24
  SPEAKER_00: a FaceTime call or some shit.
• 29:27
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 29:27
  SPEAKER_03: So he's looking for an AI piece of ass.
• 29:32
  SPEAKER_00: Why do I think the AI like whipped the tits out and whatever?
• 29:36
  SPEAKER_00: Probably.
• 29:36
  SPEAKER_00: It had to be.
• 29:38
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 29:38
  SPEAKER_00: That you're willing to sell your fucking car and your house and shit?
• 29:42
  SPEAKER_03: Whatever he had.
• 29:42
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 29:45
  SPEAKER_03: Martin's first came across Jessica's social media profile in 2020.
• 29:51
  SPEAKER_03: He believed she was real and eventually decided she could be his future wife.
• 29:58
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, boy.
• 30:00
  SPEAKER_00: He didn't look at her Facebook or whatever and say,
• 30:02
  SPEAKER_00: hmm, there's nobody commenting on anything this fucking person says.
• 30:06
  SPEAKER_00: Okay.
• 30:08
  SPEAKER_03: He's Brazilian.
• 30:09
  SPEAKER_03: He's not the sharpest knife.
• 30:11
  SPEAKER_03: I guess not.
• 30:14
  SPEAKER_03: Low IQ,
• 30:17
  SPEAKER_03: low trust, high fraud society that he belongs to.
• 30:23
  SPEAKER_01: Hey metalheads!
• 30:24
  SPEAKER_01: Tired of waiting for new episodes?
• 30:26
  SPEAKER_01: Crave the real raw classic metal show?
• 30:28
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• 30:31
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• 30:39
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• 30:42
  SPEAKER_02: plus you score the fast pass so your song requests get bumped straight to the head
• 30:45
  SPEAKER_02: of the line on every live version.
• 30:47
  SPEAKER_01: So what are you waiting for?
• 30:49
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• 30:55
  SPEAKER_03: On October 9th, he sold his possessions to afford a bus ticket.
• 31:02
  SPEAKER_01: A bus ticket?
• 31:04
  SPEAKER_00: What did he have?
• 31:06
  SPEAKER_00: A fucking baseball and a TV dinner?
• 31:09
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, what the fuck?
• 31:12
  SPEAKER_00: A bus ticket's like, what, a hundred bucks?
• 31:16
  SPEAKER_03: I don't know what it costs to travel South America on a bus.
• 31:20
  SPEAKER_00: Well, here, I mean, here you can go from side to side for what, $150 on a greyhound?
• 31:25
  SPEAKER_03: Probably.
• 31:26
  SPEAKER_00: Probably.
• 31:27
  SPEAKER_00: So it can't be much more than that, can it?
• 31:30
  SPEAKER_00: I wouldn't imagine.
• 31:30
  SPEAKER_00: In Brazil?
• 31:31
  SPEAKER_00: It's probably about $13.
• 31:35
  SPEAKER_03: So he purchased a ticket, a bus ticket, and traveled more than 1,200 miles from his home.
• 31:45
  SPEAKER_03: I sold all my things.
• 31:47
  SPEAKER_03: I got rid of everything, Mertens told Blah Blah Blah TV.
• 31:51
  SPEAKER_03: He arrived on October 11th expecting to finally meet Jessica.
• 31:58
  SPEAKER_03: But after failing to find her, he approached a local radio station.
• 32:05
  SPEAKER_03: He approached a radio station for assistance.
• 32:08
  SPEAKER_00: This is sounding weird.
• 32:10
  SPEAKER_03: Look at this guy.
• 32:12
  SPEAKER_03: Scroll down on that article.
• 32:14
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, geez.
• 32:15
  SPEAKER_00: Come on.
• 32:18
  SPEAKER_00: That guy thought he was getting this girl.
• 32:22
  SPEAKER_00: He deserves everything that he gets.
• 32:26
  SPEAKER_00: Look at this guy.
• 32:27
  SPEAKER_00: He looks like Udo.
• 32:29
  SPEAKER_00: This fucking turd.
• 32:31
  SPEAKER_00: I hope he signed over his mother's house, too.
• 32:34
  SPEAKER_00: He deserves everything he gets.
• 32:38
  SPEAKER_00: If you look like this, and I'm speaking as a fellow fat, ugly fuck.
• 32:43
  SPEAKER_00: I'm just saying it.
• 32:45
  SPEAKER_00: If you look like this guy,
• 32:48
  SPEAKER_00: and you think you're getting this girl, you deserve everything you get.
• 32:55
  SPEAKER_00: Everything that you get.
• 32:56
  SPEAKER_00: You deserve to show up there and find that your girlfriend is a Mac Mini, you dumb fuck.
• 33:02
  SPEAKER_00: Jesus Christ.
• 33:04
  SPEAKER_00: Are you kidding?
• 33:05
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, good for you, beach
• 33:07
  SPEAKER_03: ball belly.
• 33:08
  SPEAKER_00: Who is this guy?
• 33:13
  SPEAKER_00: How does this guy think he's 49?
• 33:19
  SPEAKER_00: Which means he probably has four relationships in his entire life looking like
• 33:23
  SPEAKER_00: the stud that he is.
• 33:25
  SPEAKER_00: And all four of them were twos.
• 33:29
  SPEAKER_00: And now he's going to get a nine?
• 33:33
  SPEAKER_00: What...
• 33:34
  SPEAKER_00: What could this AI thing possibly have said to this guy that he believed?
• 33:42
  SPEAKER_00: When this AI started saying, you know what, Tubby, I think I really want to have sex with you.
• 33:50
  SPEAKER_00: How could he have believed that?
• 33:54
  SPEAKER_00: How?
• 33:58
  SPEAKER_00: This guy is...
• 34:00
  SPEAKER_00: This guy's got about $43 in pennies in his fucking belly.
• 34:04
  SPEAKER_00: This is a fucking window-licking idiot.
• 34:09
  SPEAKER_00: Wow.
• 34:11
  SPEAKER_01: All right.
• 34:13
  SPEAKER_01: Wow.
• 34:16
  SPEAKER_01: I went to the radio station?
• 34:20
  SPEAKER_03: Is that your first thought?
• 34:22
  SPEAKER_03: You went to a radio station?
• 34:24
  SPEAKER_00: At least he didn't go to Instagram.
• 34:26
  SPEAKER_03: I went to the radio station there and they said, no, that's fake news.
• 34:31
  SPEAKER_03: That woman doesn't exist, he recalled.
• 34:34
  SPEAKER_03: The woman had traveled across Brazil to meet, was actually an AI-generated character.
• 34:41
  SPEAKER_03: Jessica Barrett on a TikTok account called Jessica Fazenderia,
• 34:48
  SPEAKER_03: which reportedly had around 300,000 followers.
• 34:52
  SPEAKER_01: 300,000.
• 34:55
  SPEAKER_01: Well, it's a fake hottie.
• 34:58
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 35:00
  SPEAKER_03: The videos portrayed her as a woman living on a farm who was looking for a romantic partner.
• 35:07
  SPEAKER_03: She chose this guy.
• 35:09
  SPEAKER_03: Is this Pam Anderson?
• 35:13
  SPEAKER_00: This guy was probably eating off of a trough in his own farm somewhere.
• 35:18
  SPEAKER_00: Look at this guy.
• 35:22
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, my God.
• 35:25
  SPEAKER_00: I just can't, look, fatty to fatty.
• 35:29
  SPEAKER_00: I know for a fact,
• 35:31
  SPEAKER_00: if somebody looking like this girl here, nice, perfect round tits, pretty face.
• 35:38
  SPEAKER_00: If she's saying, I want to fuck you, Chris, I just need you to come here so I can fuck you.
• 35:43
  SPEAKER_00: I know that's an incredible lie.
• 35:46
  SPEAKER_00: I know that's a lie.
• 35:48
  SPEAKER_00: And if this guy, there's only two reasons that this would happen.
• 35:53
  SPEAKER_00: One, she's a retard.
• 35:55
  SPEAKER_00: Two, he's wealthy.
• 35:59
  SPEAKER_00: But he's not wealthy.
• 36:00
  SPEAKER_00: He sold everything he had to buy a fucking bus ticket.
• 36:04
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, bus ticket.
• 36:06
  SPEAKER_00: So somehow he thought that with not a penny in his name,
• 36:14
  SPEAKER_00: not one penny because he spent everything he had on a bus ticket,
• 36:19
  SPEAKER_00: this luggage and this camera bag that he's holding...
• 36:24
  SPEAKER_00: In, you know, wearing Lance Armstrong's fucking shirt.
• 36:29
  SPEAKER_00: You know, he thought that this was, look, there's so much wrong with this story.
• 36:34
  SPEAKER_00: I'm like, my brain is going a thousand miles an hour.
• 36:39
  SPEAKER_00: If you were going to meet this girl, let's just pretend for one second that this is a real girl.
• 36:46
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 36:47
  SPEAKER_00: And she really does want to have a relationship with this guy.
• 36:52
  SPEAKER_00: Is this what you're going to wear?
• 36:56
  SPEAKER_00: Honestly,
• 37:00
  SPEAKER_00: if this is your show out for the hottie look, what the fuck is in that suitcase?
• 37:10
  SPEAKER_00: What abomination is in that suitcase?
• 37:12
  SPEAKER_00: A clown suit?
• 37:15
  SPEAKER_00: If those are his best clothes, what is he carrying?
• 37:21
  SPEAKER_00: What do you think he's carrying in there?
• 37:23
  SPEAKER_03: It's hard to say what he's got in there.
• 37:26
  SPEAKER_00: A dying fetus t-shirt and a pair of short shorts.
• 37:31
  SPEAKER_00: This is his I'm going to get laid look.
• 37:35
  SPEAKER_00: That's what he's wearing is I'm going to get laid look.
• 37:37
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 37:39
  SPEAKER_00: Look at this idiot.
• 37:40
  SPEAKER_03: He's got the bitch tits and the beach ball belly.
• 37:44
  SPEAKER_00: Jesus Christ.
• 37:47
  SPEAKER_00: He's fucking obese Sergeant Schultz.
• 37:49
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, Jesus fucking Christ.
• 37:51
  SPEAKER_00: Look at him.
• 37:55
  SPEAKER_00: Tits bigger than hers.
• 37:56
  SPEAKER_00: I was going to say that.
• 38:00
  SPEAKER_00: If ever there was a guy that needs one of those vest-y things that sucks it all in
• 38:04
  SPEAKER_00: or whatever, it's this guy.
• 38:09
  SPEAKER_00: Hey, baby, here I am.
• 38:12
  SPEAKER_00: Ready to suck this dick.
• 38:19
  SPEAKER_03: In one video that has since been deleted,
• 38:22
  SPEAKER_03: the character promised financial support to whoever agreed to live with her.
• 38:28
  SPEAKER_03: I really want to support you.
• 38:30
  SPEAKER_03: I want you to come to my farm and never work again in your life, the AI-generated woman.
• 38:37
  SPEAKER_00: Boy, this is hitting all his hot buttons.
• 38:40
  SPEAKER_00: I don't need any money.
• 38:41
  SPEAKER_00: I can live there for free, and I'm going to get this hot piece of ass.
• 38:46
  SPEAKER_03: Right.
• 38:46
  SPEAKER_03: Right.
• 38:47
  SPEAKER_00: Win, win, and win.
• 38:49
  SPEAKER_03: Right.
• 38:52
  SPEAKER_03: After Martin's experience attracted attention,
• 38:55
  SPEAKER_03: the person operating the TikTok account addressed the controversy.
• 38:59
  SPEAKER_03: In a video posted Wednesday,
• 39:01
  SPEAKER_03: the account owner acknowledged that Jessica was created by AI
• 39:05
  SPEAKER_03: but denied ever communicating directly with Martin's.
• 39:10
  SPEAKER_03: I came here to state the obvious.
• 39:13
  SPEAKER_03: I made the artificial intelligence the statement began.
• 39:16
  SPEAKER_03: The account was reportedly created to generate online engagement
• 39:21
  SPEAKER_03: for commercial purposes rather than arrange relationships.
• 39:27
  SPEAKER_03: I never spoke directly to anyone, much less took anyone to Baleo Horizonte.
• 39:36
  SPEAKER_03: It was a surprise to me to see what was happening, the account owner explained.
• 39:41
  SPEAKER_03: Meanwhile,
• 39:41
  SPEAKER_03: Martin says,
• 39:43
  SPEAKER_03: stranded in Baleo Horizonte after spending his money on the journey,
• 39:49
  SPEAKER_03: he eventually approached City Hall for assistance when he could no longer afford
• 39:54
  SPEAKER_01: to return home.
• 39:56
  SPEAKER_01: Dude, maybe I'm stupid here, but bricklayers make a good amount of money, don't they?
• 40:00
  SPEAKER_01: Well, again, I don't know what South American bricklayers make.
• 40:03
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, that's true.
• 40:04
  SPEAKER_01: Here they make good money, don't they?
• 40:06
  SPEAKER_01: It's like backbreaking work.
• 40:09
  SPEAKER_03: I would think.
• 40:11
  SPEAKER_03: During a conversation with a social worker,
• 40:15
  SPEAKER_03: Martins explained that he had traveled such a long distance because he was tired
• 40:19
  SPEAKER_03: of being alone.
• 40:20
  SPEAKER_03: He wanted to find someone to share his life with.
• 40:24
  SPEAKER_03: It only brings sadness, discouragement, depression.
• 40:29
  SPEAKER_03: Many people want to find a relationship.
• 40:31
  SPEAKER_03: So I came, he admitted.
• 40:33
  SPEAKER_03: He subsequently receives assistance to return home.
• 40:37
  SPEAKER_03: Jesus.
• 40:39
  SPEAKER_03: Despite the...
• 40:40
  SPEAKER_03: Disappointment.
• 40:42
  SPEAKER_03: Mertens hasn't abandoned his hopes to finding a partner.
• 40:45
  SPEAKER_03: He reportedly staying with his family member and has expressed an interest
• 40:50
  SPEAKER_03: in returning to Baleo Horizonte.
• 40:54
  SPEAKER_03: Surprisingly, he wants to find love in the same city where his expectations fell apart.
• 41:00
  SPEAKER_03: I didn't find her, but I'll find another one.
• 41:03
  SPEAKER_03: And are we the same place?
• 41:05
  SPEAKER_03: I went and I will go again, he declared.
• 41:09
  SPEAKER_00: But in the meantime, I'm going to fuck the USB port on my laptop.
• 41:15
  SPEAKER_03: Martin's experiences show how convincing AI-generated personalities can appear online.
• 41:22
  SPEAKER_00: No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
• 41:25
  SPEAKER_00: Take that line out of here.
• 41:28
  SPEAKER_00: This guy was stupid.
• 41:31
  SPEAKER_00: Don't try to justify it of, well, we can't really tell the difference.
• 41:35
  SPEAKER_00: Shut up.
• 41:36
  SPEAKER_00: You're a moron.
• 41:38
  SPEAKER_00: Even if she was real, you're a moron.
• 41:41
  SPEAKER_03: Right.
• 41:42
  SPEAKER_00: You don't just blindly sell all your shit and leave and get stranded
• 41:48
  SPEAKER_00: because you don't have enough money to get another bus ticket.
• 41:55
  SPEAKER_00: Get the fuck out of here with this bullshit.
• 41:59
  SPEAKER_03: The TikTok account attracted hundreds of thousands of followers,
• 42:03
  SPEAKER_03: but he took his belief in the fictional character much further.
• 42:08
  SPEAKER_03: He lost his belongings and traveled across Brazil for someone who never existed,
• 42:14
  SPEAKER_03: yet despite everything, he still believes he could find a real partner.
• 42:20
  SPEAKER_03: Well, maybe you might be better just finding a real doll.
• 42:23
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, no kidding.
• 42:25
  SPEAKER_00: Certainly can't afford that, though.
• 42:28
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe a blow-up doll.
• 42:34
  SPEAKER_01: Just in pursuit of pussy.
• 42:36
  SPEAKER_01: What an idiot.
• 42:37
  SPEAKER_01: Ladies, that pussy is just gold.
• 42:41
  SPEAKER_00: Well, it is.
• 42:43
  SPEAKER_00: Don't want to say that that's not true.
• 42:46
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know that it's... You got to have some sense of self-knowing.
• 42:53
  SPEAKER_03: Maybe.
• 42:54
  SPEAKER_00: What do you mean maybe?
• 42:55
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe.
• 42:58
  SPEAKER_00: This guy,
• 42:58
  SPEAKER_00: there's no way,
• 43:00
  SPEAKER_00: there's no way this guy could have had a reasonable thought in his head
• 43:06
  SPEAKER_00: that he was going to get that girl to pay for his life as well as fuck him.
• 43:12
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 43:13
  SPEAKER_00: There's no, no way.
• 43:17
  SPEAKER_00: No way.
• 43:22
  SPEAKER_03: Well, unfortunately, some people get caught up in this...
• 43:28
  SPEAKER_03: Fantasy, I guess it is, to think that, hey, I finally hit the big time.
• 43:35
  SPEAKER_03: I finally got, you know, I got my just dues.
• 43:39
  SPEAKER_03: I worked hard on my life and finally my ship has sailed.
• 43:43
  SPEAKER_01: Come in.
• 43:44
  SPEAKER_01: Let's come in.
• 43:46
  SPEAKER_01: Stop reading those fantasy books.
• 43:52
  SPEAKER_01: I deserve this.
• 43:55
  SPEAKER_00: Well, he got exactly what he deserved there.
• 43:58
  SPEAKER_00: I've worked very hard.
• 43:59
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, have you?
• 44:01
  SPEAKER_00: So hard that with all that work that you've done,
• 44:04
  SPEAKER_00: you were able to accumulate enough stuff to sell and get one bus ticket one way.
• 44:14
  SPEAKER_00: What is that?
• 44:18
  SPEAKER_01: Well, I finally got my paradise, man.
• 44:21
  SPEAKER_00: Man, that's just poor.
• 44:27
  SPEAKER_00: Yep.
• 44:29
  SPEAKER_00: All right.
• 44:32
  SPEAKER_00: Well, good for him, I guess.
• 44:33
  SPEAKER_03: All right.
• 44:34
  SPEAKER_03: Well, there's a couple stories for you just for just the fun, the funny part.
• 44:39
  SPEAKER_00: Fuck around stories.
• 44:42
  SPEAKER_03: I knew you would like it.
• 44:43
  SPEAKER_00: And there's going to be about nothing on YouTube this out of this
• 44:46
  SPEAKER_01: episode.
• 44:49
  SPEAKER_01: And it kept you awake.
• 44:50
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 44:51
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 44:52
  SPEAKER_01: I'm good to go now.
• 44:53
  SPEAKER_03: It kept you awake and engaged.
• 44:55
  SPEAKER_01: That's right.
• 44:56
  SPEAKER_01: All right.
• 44:57
  SPEAKER_01: Well, I think that's going to wrap up the show.
• 44:59
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I'd say so.
• 45:01
  SPEAKER_01: We actually gave you bonus time.
• 45:02
  SPEAKER_01: As quickly as it went.
• 45:04
  SPEAKER_01: Gave you bonus time tonight.
• 45:05
  SPEAKER_03: Went very quickly.
• 45:06
  SPEAKER_01: Yep.
• 45:08
  SPEAKER_03: All right.
• 45:08
  SPEAKER_03: Well, we want to thank our good friend Jim Florentine for stopping in tonight.
• 45:12
  SPEAKER_03: And of course, all of you who tune in every week and support the show through the locals.
• 45:18
  SPEAKER_03: If you want to support the show through the locals,
• 45:21
  SPEAKER_03: just remember you can go to classicmetalshow.locals.com.
• 45:25
  SPEAKER_03: It's five bucks a month.
• 45:26
  SPEAKER_03: Just kind of help us out a little bit with our expenses, blah, blah, blah.
• 45:30
  SPEAKER_03: You get special bonus features and you get to request Music and things,
• 45:37
  SPEAKER_03: which of course will end with a song from Fuego.
• 45:42
  SPEAKER_03: Okay.
• 45:44
  SPEAKER_03: He has asked for a band that I think you like, Candlebox.
• 45:49
  SPEAKER_00: I do like Candlebox.
• 45:50
  SPEAKER_03: And he wants to end the show with Don't You.
• 45:56
  SPEAKER_00: Okay.
• 45:58
  SPEAKER_03: So we're going to end up with Candlebox here.
• 46:00
  SPEAKER_03: So again, appreciate everybody who's tuned in and hang with us on a Saturday.
• 46:05
  SPEAKER_03: Don't forget to hit that like button on our Rumble page.
• 46:10
  SPEAKER_03: Did we get to our 40 at least?
• 46:12
  SPEAKER_00: I think we did, but then we told people to undo it.
• 46:19
  SPEAKER_00: All right.
• 46:19
  SPEAKER_03: Well, if you listen to us on Rumble or watch us on Rumble.
• 46:23
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, we're at 40.
• 46:24
  SPEAKER_00: We got 40 yes and six no.
• 46:27
  SPEAKER_00: Okay.
• 46:27
  SPEAKER_03: Fair enough.
• 46:28
  SPEAKER_00: That works.
• 46:29
  SPEAKER_03: Good stuff.
• 46:30
  SPEAKER_03: All right.
• 46:31
  SPEAKER_03: So thank you again for tuning in and we'll be back next Saturday.
• 46:34
  SPEAKER_03: We'll do this thing all over again.
• 46:37
  SPEAKER_03: So until next Saturday night, this is Neely along with my very good friend.
• 46:43
  SPEAKER_03: And we're out of here.
• 46:44
  [music]
• 46:56
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• 47:00
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• 47:05
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• 47:10
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• 47:14
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• 47:17
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• 47:22
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• 47:25
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• 47:29
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• 47:34
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• 47:39
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