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Episode 14: LETS NOT WISH WE HAD · YOUR AVERAGE DELTON

• DELTON DEAL: Hey guys, welcome back to the Average Dubb. ⁓ This is the place where we discuss real life, ⁓ real loss, and the things most people never see. ⁓ No filters, no pretending, ⁓ just truth. ⁓ Hey, we're on a little ride out to go play some golf in Riuidoso, but I thought ⁓ while we're going, this is a trip that's been in the making for 10 years that we just haven't taken. ⁓ We just didn't make the time to take it. So it had me thinking, ⁓ what are those things that we always want to do that we know we should do? That we just procrastinate and never get to it. And we don't want to live our life and be one of those folks that wish we had. So today we're gonna talk about let's not be one of those guys that wish we had. Let's get out, let's go do the things we wanna do, make the phone calls we wanna see, go see the people. And I'm really gonna talk about some things that I know that I've done that looking back on it, I've missed some major moments because of whatever the circumstances were. And let's talk a lot. So let's start with the sad truth. I played golf with a guy, older guy, 81, got his first hole in one at 75, and then we lost track a little bit and hadn't played for a while. So I finally went through this of thinking, you know, I need to go look him up. I need to go make sure he's doing okay. So I finally found where he was standing. He was in a VA hospital, the guys that told me that he was there, he had fallen and broken his hip. So we wanted to make sure that we got over to see him. So we go to this VA hospital, and all of a sudden, I wish we had gone faster. I wish we had made it by, because now he's canatonic. There was nothing that we could do. So we sat with him for a little while, but you know, he just wasn't there anymore. And as of a couple of days, he's now been put on hospice. That's that's that's the that's the worst that it's going to get. Or is it? As I look at some of those things though, those were things that I could have changed, that I could have just done earlier. And there was no harm in it. There was no malice. There was nothing mean happening. We just didn't take the time to go out and see a friend. So I guess what I'm trying to say is today is going to be about making sure we go out And make those choices today. Let's not prioritize everything else over it. Let's just keep moving forward and let's you can still be busy. You can still do the things you need to do. It's going to take a little effort, but it's not gonna take any time really. So one of the things just to kind of before I get away from me, a couple of things that I've missed. My middle brother had just finished sergeant major school when he was in the Had a graduation, a big dude I, you know, in the middle of working and getting promoted and going over to Ohio and just we didn't make time to make that a priority because work said I had to be somewhere else. Could I have arranged it? I don't know. Could I rearrange my schedule to make that happen? Don't know. But the part of what I want to talk about is that I didn't make the effort to make sure it was important enough to do. How many times does that happen? So I missed that. Called my brother. We talked. There's no harm. There's no foul. But I could have made a bigger effort to do those things because those things matter when you start looking back on what you've done. Now we look up at my oldest son. Had his graduation ceremony Texas University of Arlington. We had just opened a new business. We were drowning in Holiday hands. Another opportunity that we missed. In 600 feet, keep right. Told you I was on a little trip here. I'm going through Border Patrol, but we'll be fine. So, one of the things I want to talk about is that why do we stop those things? Why do we stop making those happen? My second oldest brother had gotten remarried. Small ceremony, they didn't do a wedding, they were just gonna do a reception. Instead of making the time, this was still during that holiday hem period. It was absolutely astonishing that we didn't make it. Another opportunity that we could have, but just didn't. So what I'm encouraging all of us to do is to make sure that we stop doing those things and start prioritizing the things that we should. So when we think about some of the reasons we don't do those things, I mean if you ask yourself, are any of them really good enough? Any of those things really important enough that we should just not do it? So we have to start thinking differently about the decisions we make. We can't just think of a decision in the time we're in it. We have to think, what are the ramifications long term if we decide not to go to see a game, not to go to see a graduation, not to go to see a dance recital? If the worst thing possible happened in our life, would we be okay with saying, boy, I wish we had. You know, I've already told you guys that my bride went through a horrible time. And she was gone for basically two years. And still looking at that time, there's a wish we had moment that she wishes she had done. Why not just pack up and go live there for six months? Go live there for five months. Go take that time because we could do that. Why not do that? Let's, you know, you get tired, you have to find a way to rest yourself, you're doing a lot, But could you have done it? Yes. So let's start thinking through those things as we're going. So think about your life today. What things are you wishing? you had done. What opportunities are coming up that you wish you could make? I was talking to one of my favorite teachers, a really big influence in my life, and he's having a reunion that he's going to go to. And he was reluctant and thinking, I'm not sure I'm gonna go, but I'm thinking about it. But he came to the realization that, you know, that makes sense to me. I don't want to be one of those guys that wish I had. There might be some turmoil. There might be some family drama. There might be Doesn't matter. We can still get up and go do the things we want to do because we're making it a priority. I think this not wishing we had can be a lot more than just going somewhere. How many of you have wanted to write a book? How many of you wanted to learn to play the guitar? How many of you had wanted to learn another language? How many of you have wanted to do anything that you have in mind that you've just said? When I get time. I don't have the time right now. I'll prioritize I I need to get these one, two, three items done, and then I'll have time on the other side of that. You know, the one thing that I am absolutely certain of is that tomorrow is not promised. That we are not in control of the clock that we're living by. I hope we all get to a hundred. That would be the ideal goal, right? We're all living to 100 and we can still walk and have our faculties about us. Life has taught me that's not always the case. It's not always the case that we're going to be able to decide that. So we need to start making the decisions. You got a business you want to open? Have you done the homework yet? What are you waiting for? You want to join the armed forces? What are you waiting for? You want to become a teacher? What are you waiting for? What are those things you want to do that you're procrastinating about? I still have, at 67 years old, I still have a lot of wants and dreams that I want to accomplish. And I am one of those guys, I admit it, that jump early. Maybe too early sometimes. That's one of those flaws that I've decided I'm okay with living with. I might jump too early and we'll figure it out on the way. We try to do homework. We try to make sure we're heading in the right direction. And again, I'll tell you, when you marry up, this is the kind of support you get because some people will jump off a clip with you're not knowing where it's gonna end. Is that good news? So far so good. Let's talk about something a little differently. In the midst of trying to live our lives, you know, we all have these friends that we know that we can make a phone call to. We know which ones are gonna take five minutes, 15 minutes, 20 minutes, or three hours. Some of our best friends, some of the best people we talk to are those three hour folks. So we procrastinate even longer in calling them because my God, I gotta make. three hours time to sit and talk. I know it's gonna be between one and three hours. We got a lot to talk about. And it's not that they are a big talker. It's that that the conversation is so well groomed between us both that we keep talking. That we bring up the past, we talk about the future, we're talking about what's going on now, that there is a conversation that is really great to have and that's the things that we want to make sure that we're doing. But do we make that call? Do we find another reason to say, I'm tired, I've worked hard, I've got a lot on my mind. Those are things that will never change. You're gonna always be tired at some point. we're gonna always have a lot on our mind. We're gonna always be driving toward something else. It's incumbent upon us to hold things together. Let's even take that a little further and talk about how that relates to family. When is it okay to not go see family? We find a lot of reasons. We know it's difficult you have kids. It's Christmas. You have kids, it's Thanksgiving. You've got to take vacations. You're only getting two or three weeks a year, depending on your job, and you've got to go take the family somewhere to go see it. Your family doesn't all live in the same town. So you can prioritize it once. But as your parents get older, As your grandparents get older, as your siblings get older, we just talked about there are no guarantees for tomorrow. We've got to prioritize when we go to see folks. And we gotta start doing it now because there is no time like the present. And then we talk about when there's a riff in the family. ⁓ Is it okay then? ⁓ How do we mend it so we don't wish we had ⁓ sooner? ⁓ Guys, there's no time for that. ⁓ We want to be the better people. We want to be the better man. We want to be the better woman. We want to be the better person ⁓ to make sure that we can keep a family together. I can do anything for a short period time. ⁓ ⁓ and if I have to humble myself ⁓ Then I'm willing to do that because the better part of me knows I don't want to wish I had. Those are the things that start to haunt me. What are the things that haunt you? Can you think of those situations where you wish you had? Can you think of those situations where you wanted to do something but you didn't do it because you were having a problem? So guys, we all know that there are legitimate reasons why you can't make certain things. Those are not the times I'm talking about. I'm talking about those times when we can We know that sometimes there are work commitments, there are life commitments, there are business commitments that you can't make. Those are not the ones I'm talking about. The ones I want us to really take a look at prioritizing is those things we know we can do. That's what's gonna be important. Anyway guys, thanks for listening. Thanks for sharing the moment with me. This is your average Delton And please remember, your life ⁓ is the only sermon that some folks will ever hear. ⁓ Make it loud. ⁓ And as always, I'd like to leave you with something, so I'll leave you with this. ⁓ Sometimes late at night, ⁓ I lie awake ⁓ and watch her sleep. She's lost in peaceful dreams so I turn out the light and lay there in And a thought crosses my I never wake in the morning Would she ever doubt the way I feel about her in my heart? And if tomorrow never comes... Will she know how much I loved her? Did I try in every way? To show her every day? She's my only one And if my time on earth were She must face this world without me Is the love I gave her gonna be enough If tomorrow Guys, this is your average film.