Latest / Motherhood Alliance Podcast / How to Help Your Child Become a Strong Communicator w/ Hannah Wesolowski | GB Pediatric Therapy
Transcript
- Britney Suttner: Hi, we are Britt Andrea from motherhoodalliance.com and we are excited to welcome you to a new four episode series with Hannah Weslowski, a certified speech language pathologist and the founder of Green Bay Pediatric Therapies. As a speech therapist, Hannah specializes in articulation and speech sound production, language development, autism support, and social skills, helping children build the communication tools they need to confidently navigate the world around Through her work in private practice, Hannah loves being able to work directly with both parents and their kiddos, often meeting families right in their homes where they feel the most comfortable. Outside of her work, Hannah is a full-time mom of two who enjoys reading, traveling, and spending time with her family. We're excited to introduce you to her now. Let's get started with today's episode. Hey everyone, welcome back. We are in episode three with Hannah. Hannah, we're so excited to have you back for another great episode. Hannah Wesolowski: Yeah, thanks for having me. Britney Suttner: For those of you just tuning in to this episode for the first time, I do want to just share what we've talked about in our first two episodes, because you may actually want to hit pause and head back to those episodes. We might have covered some things in those that would apply to this one. would be really good back knowledge. In our first episode, we talked really what is, about what does a speech therapist do specifically a pediatric speech therapist, different types of services, different locations for services, different arenas outside of just like pronunciation of words. What else can Hannah help with? And then in episode two, we kind of took a little sideways tilt into a different type of topic. We talked all about IEPs. And so if your kid was becoming close to school aged and you just have kind of a red flag going off of like, I think that they might need a little bit of extra support. Hannah did a beautiful job walking us through the process of what to expect if you're going to be going through the IEP process. In this episode, this is going to be a great one because I think it applies to all kids. think we're all thinking about this. It's going to be about. everyday ways to build communication skills at home. How can we help our kids be great communicators starting from when they're little? So I guess first question to jump in at what age does communication really start for kids? Hannah Wesolowski: Yeah, so I think when we think of communication as a whole, a lot of times like on the questionnaires for our children and on the ASQs, it's like, when did your kids start babbling? or when did your kids say their first word or when are we starting to say sentences? But really communication starts on day one. So one of the first ways that we communicate as humans is by touch. And like a baby, we feed our children, we hold our kids, we comfort them, we teach them regulation of emotions on starting on day one. And that sets the foundation for all of our communication that we have. so when does communication start? It really starts on the first day of life. And when does it end? It ends on the last day of life. And I think that's the beautiful thing about communication. Britney Suttner: Yeah, for sure. And I've heard you talk about creating a language rich environment. So I think you probably apply it to little kids or could even apply it to school aged kids. But what do you mean by that? And then why is it important, especially for like babies? Like, why does it, why does it matter? Hannah Wesolowski: Totally, yeah. I think when we think of language and communication, as parents, we are looking at every milestone that our kid has, right? We're waiting for them to get their first tooth, and we're waiting for them to take their first step, and we're waiting for them to say their first words. And if we're not doing it on this specific timeline, there's something wrong with my kid. When in reality, like... every kid develops differently. There is a different range of development. And so really, like with communication and language, we can take the pressure off. And we can just interact with our children. So that is the biggest piece of advice that I have for any parent is interact with your child. Bring them in to your daily life. Bring them into the things that you are doing. Bring them in to those interactions. Sit on the floor with your children. I think oftentimes like we don't pause enough as parents because our to-do list is so long and it's never ending and Brittany and I were just talking. about how how long our to-do lists are and it feels like sometimes more things are added then things get crossed off. And so it's just taking a moment to sit with your child and talk to them and play with them and just be. And while you're being, talk. You could talk about anything. But I think we just need to stop and we need to talk. And really, that is us creating language-rich environments. We can always choose more vocabulary words. We can always choose more things. We can read more books. We can say all of the words, but if we're not saying any words at all, our kids aren't getting that language input. So pause, sit on the floor, and talk to your kiddos. Britney Suttner: Hmm. So you're saying even for like the young, young ones, like let's say you have a six month old, right? And so Hannah Wesolowski: Absolutely. Britney Suttner: even if it's just you and your six month old and, your baby's laying on the floor doing some tummy time or, you know, fiddling with something, you're just Hannah Wesolowski: Yes. Britney Suttner: sitting there like chatting, right? Like, look at that, that's Hannah Wesolowski: Bob. Britney Suttner: red and that's hard. And that has, that has corners. This is called a corner. Like, are you like narrating life or how do you actually do this? Hannah Wesolowski: Absolutely, yeah, I can kind of feel like pretty intimidating. My husband always jokes that I'm always speech therapy-ing my kids because I am talking non-stop and I tend to be a very fast talker and I enjoy talking so it's pretty natural to me. But other people, like talking isn't as natural and it doesn't feel as easy and it doesn't just like come... Yeah, it just doesn't come. one of the things that you can do is talk about what you're doing. So if I am folding a load of laundry, it's something that, as moms and dads, we're doing it every day, it feels like. And sometimes we spend four hours doing it, because it's the weekend and we have time to do it. So when we're folding laundry, have your kiddo with you. We can be pulling out a A shirt out of the basket. could say, oh, it's a shirt. Look at it. It's a red shirt. Do you see the smiley face on the shirt? And we're folding the shirt and we're putting it in a pile. Uh-oh, what's next? We have a pair of jeans. Look, they're blue jeans. Let's fold the jeans. Right, we're just talking about what we're doing. Or if we're unloading the dishwasher, like talking about like, let's put the plate in the cupboard. Let's put the silverware in the drawer. In those small interactions, we're just adding language to something that we're already doing. We're labeling, we're using prepositions or locations words. We are using, we can use color words, we can use descriptive words, we are using nouns and verbs, and all we're doing is just narrating what we're doing in life. It doesn't have to be complex. And communication, again, starts day one. We can start reading to our children on day one of life. We can start Talking to our children day one of life. We can start singing to our children's day one of life Like these are children's these are just different ways that we can interact and just build that vocabulary from day one Britney Suttner: Okay, what about background music? Because as you're talking about, you love talking. I don't feel like I would thoroughly enjoy narrating my entire life all day long, especially Hannah Wesolowski: Absolutely. Britney Suttner: if I had little kids. So when I'm thinking about folding laundry, even if I had a baby, sitting nearby or laying there whatever, I'd be like, well, maybe I'll put a podcast on or maybe I'll put some Christian music in the background. Are those types Hannah Wesolowski: Mm-hmm. Britney Suttner: of things still beneficial? Or are you really needing like the... facial expressions and is it beneficial to be talking about things that are like actually in front of them or or Hannah Wesolowski: Mm-hmm. Britney Suttner: is that effective too? Hannah Wesolowski: Yeah, any language is good language, right? So if we, if kids are hearing words, language is good language. What we tend to see, especially with little kiddos, is that one-on-one face-to-face conversation tends to increase their language. A kiddo cannot pick up, especially like on a screen, they can't pick up on the same cues as a person being in front of them. Kids have vast vocabulary if you think or they're getting vast vocabulary input if you think about how much People are talking around them all day long the more words that they can have access to the higher their vocabularies naturally Will be because they've had access to that vocabulary. So Face-to-face is always better. However, if we're in a position where that's not gonna work Put on that Christian music, right? Sing the songs to your child. Talk about maybe things that you hear in the song. Or sometimes I have thoughts, so instead of keeping them in my brain, just talk them out loud. Britney Suttner: Yeah. Hannah Wesolowski: Like, I should go do the laundry. I'm thinking that in my head. Mom's gonna go do the laundry. That's one sentence that I just thought in my head instead of just walking downstairs. I am just saying a sentence out loud, right? it doesn't always have to be these big profound thoughts or these moments. It can just be what we're doing in our everyday lives already. Britney Suttner: Okay. Now I think about as kids are getting more into, mean, even toddlers can be like this, but even school age, like we want, we want to be able to teach the balance of safety and not necessarily going up to strangers and telling them your address, you know, stuff like that. But also we want our kids to be able to be strong communicators, especially with adults. And so I'm guessing it kind of starts not only with this repetition of talking out loud a lot, but Is there intention that you can do with back and forth interaction and what would be like the age that that's appropriate to really be starting to focus on? Hannah Wesolowski: Yeah, we can start that as soon as one years old, is kind of weird, even before that, I guess, which is kind of interesting to think about, right? When we're thinking about. kiddos who are older. One of the ways that we can do this is just turn taking. So sitting on the floor, passing a ball back and forth. It is showing one person goes and then the next person. And we, it's just a simple interaction of passing the ball back and forth, So we give the ball to someone, they send it back, Now we're adding in some language to that, right? So when we have a conversation, there's two parts of it. There's the pausing and the listening. And there's also, the communication and the saying and a lot of times with my kiddos when I'm teaching communication skills if they don't quite have those turn-taking skills a Ball is a really awesome visual representation for that back-and-forth conversation even just bringing attention to like if I ask you a question Remember like you can ask me the the same question, right? And sometimes kids just pick up on it and other times we need to be Directly teaching them how to engage in that conversation and how to not only give in conversations but also like take and that's that listening and communicating at the same time. Britney Suttner: Okay, honing in a little bit more on the school age and that's where my kids are at right now. So I feel like this is Hannah Wesolowski: Yeah. Yeah. Britney Suttner: helpful because I have that I'm in that season and you're in like the younger kids season. And so Hannah Wesolowski: Totally. Britney Suttner: with my kids being school aged, like my son is very outgoing. And so his personality is a little bit more like he'll he'll just like chat with people. My daughter is Hannah Wesolowski: Yeah. Britney Suttner: very shy. If she meets somebody new, she'll like hide behind me and you it takes a little bit more, but I'm also trying to encourage her. She's one where it's like, if she wants it, if we're at a restaurant and she needs another napkin, Hannah Wesolowski: Yeah. Britney Suttner: I'm like, go up and ask for a napkin. And she's like, no, you do it for me. You know, whereas my son would Hannah Wesolowski: Totally. Britney Suttner: happily do it for her if needed. How Hannah Wesolowski: percent. Britney Suttner: do we give them confidence in communication at the same time? Hannah Wesolowski: Yeah, so I think one of the really big ways that we can do that is through modeling. So for example, if we're taking your child needing a new napkin, we can first bring our child along with us and model like, hey, can I have a new napkin? Right, so that is me as the adult modeling that behavior. She's with me observing what's happening, right? And so she's able to see like, oh, it's not a scary process to ask for a new napkin. I'm gonna ask for it and they're gonna give it back. Okay, great. Next time, I'm gonna go with her, right? And we're gonna be hand in hand, but she's gonna say the words, So we're slowly giving them more confidence. We're slowly giving them more skills. But the first step was us doing it. So the next time she's asking for that napkin and we're standing with her, right? And eventually we'll get to the point of like, can do this, right? Like it's not scary to walk up to someone, like it's their job to serve you in that instance. So a lot of it has to do with like first modeling, walking through the steps and kind of we call it scaffolding. So scaffolding, if you think about like when you see scaffolding on the side of a building when they're painting, there's different levels of it. So it's the same idea. So there's different levels of support and as we support our children, in those communication opportunities, we can just continue to take steps back until they feel like they have the ability to do it on their own. Another good example is calling for doctor's appointments. Calling for, if we're thinking about kids who are gonna be 18. I remember for me, when I was in high school, that was one of the most terrifying experiences. And I think it was just because like, I didn't ever do it. I have an awesome rock star mom and she just like always set up all my appointments for me and then I went to college and I had to call for my first doctor's appointment and the amount of anxiety that I felt was through the roof because I never had to do it before and now I'm at college by myself without my mom sitting next to me right and I'm having to make this phone call where it would have been helpful if I was in high school and I would have listened to my mom make that phone call. And then my mom would have been sitting next to me and I would have made it and then she could have like walked me through like, mom, I have a question. I don't know the answer to this. Like, can you help? And she's there as a clutch for me to. for me to call on if I need it versus me being at college away from that support and then having to do this because now I'm an adult. So it's just thinking about like as an adult, what are some of those communication opportunities that we have and how can we support our kids while they're still in the comfort of our own home, while they're still in our environment, right? And it's the same at any age. It's just the situations and the scenarios and the situations look different. Britney Suttner: I think what you're making right now is such a great point because I think about how technology has really helped us stay in our comfort zone. Great example Hannah Wesolowski: Absolutely. Britney Suttner: is myself. I would much rather text a service person than call them. Hannah Wesolowski: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Britney Suttner: And so like what you're saying right now is I think we do need to take a step back in our current society of technology and almost like give our kids opportunities or make them take opportunities that are going to put them outside of their comfort zone. And then when they're adults, they're going to have to make their own decisions on how they handle these things. But I do not like making phone calls. I'd rather order Domino's pizza through the app. Hannah Wesolowski: Absolutely. Britney Suttner: then call the store. And it's like, well, there's also kind of a problem in that. Okay, Hannah Wesolowski: This way. This way. Britney Suttner: so we're touching, I mean, we're kind of all on the board with ages here. So you can take Hannah Wesolowski: Yeah. Britney Suttner: this question in whatever age group or maybe different age groups, but what are some things that maybe parents are doing that can be detrimental to speech? What are some things that we should not be doing? Hannah Wesolowski: Yeah, so if we're thinking about like my brain goes to younger right away When we want kids to talk oftentimes we can ask the question. What's this a lot? Right. We want to see like what is the knowledge that they know? What are the words that they know right? Like what color is this and we're waiting for them to say red? what What is this? It's a ball. what is that? It's a bird. What is On the floor, it's a book, right? Like we're waiting for them to say a vocabulary word because if they say it, they know it and like that's a really cool thing. However, we are teaching our kids to be reliant on these prompts, right? And so again, I'm jumping back to modeling. Instead of saying like, what is this? We can say, look, a book. Right? We could say it again. Oh look, a book. I see a book. The book is on the shelf. In that 20 seconds, I just said the word book four times, right? So I am adding meaning to this item in their world. And the more that we say vocabulary words, the more that we're giving a name or a label to what the item is. Then when they do say the word, right? If we say the word ball, You're right. It's a red ball so we can repeat back what they said with adding more vocabulary To that one word right so ball yeah red ball. and then they say red ball Yeah, big red ball so now there's three vocabulary words when it was one so we don't need to be doing the what's this? What's this? What's this questions instead? Just model the language. We don't need to be asking the questions. You should just be saying what it is because seeing what's this isn't giving them the language to answer the question. Does that kind of make sense? Britney Suttner: Yeah, very interesting perspective. Do you have any other examples like that of things that parents are commonly doing that they should maybe approach in a different way? Hannah Wesolowski: Yeah, another thing is like forcing repetition so and this repetition is so important But if we are sitting on the floor and we are saying ball ball ball ball like great, but I'm zoning you out, right? Like I am not listening to what you're saying anymore because you sound like a broken record. You're just saying the same things over and over again. So that's our like incorporating that vocabulary into that everyday interaction into those sentences is really beneficial. Again, it's not natural to walk around and say table. Fridge, stove, right, like things in our environment. That vocabulary is great, but we can incorporate that into our everyday language and sentences. And then the last thing that I often see is parents comparing to other children. I think it can be so hard when you're at those mom play groups, right? And you have kids who are a month apart and this child is speaking in full sentences and you can understand a hundred percent of what they say and it's not your kid. And you can only understand 75 % of what your child says and their sentence structure may not be up to par with where this other kiddo is at. And so now we're spiraling of like, Oh my goodness, like my child has a speech disorder and they're behind and they're delayed. Could that be true? Yes. Is that always true? Absolutely not. It's not. And kids, when we think of development, there is a large range of when a skill is developing and it could develop at the beginning of that. range and it could develop at the end of that range. So when we're comparing to other people's children, your kids might have skills that another kiddo doesn't have. So it's really just looking at that bigger lens. But again, going back to if you think that there is some red glaring, red flags, or you have that mom gut feeling like we talked about in the previous episodes. seek out help. There is help. have, there are professionals out there who will answer your questions and will tell you like, yes, this is normal or no, we should probably dig a little deeper and see if we need to start that evaluation. Britney Suttner: Yeah. And that's, that's why I love that you offer a free consult for families because there's, man, it's just so often that as parents, we're sitting in this little ball of nerves in our stomach of just like, is something wrong? Is something not? don't, I don't know. And now I'm feeling like anxious about it. And so Hannah Wesolowski: Yeah. Britney Suttner: that's, I just, love that you offer that free consult. Staying on this topic of things not to do something I know I've done and I'm still doing Hannah Wesolowski: Listen to this. Britney Suttner: once in a while. And again, my kids are 10 and eight. is my son is very talkative, my daughter's pretty talkative, but she's a little quieter. I find either myself or my son answering questions for her. And so like if my husband Hannah Wesolowski: Yes. Britney Suttner: is home and he's like, Everly, why is there dirt on your shoe? I'll be like, she tripped in the driveway. And he's like, I was talking to her. I'm like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And so, you know, especially when the kids are little. and they're just learning their words. Older siblings will oftentimes be the talkers, right? But Hannah Wesolowski: Mm-hmm. Britney Suttner: even as us as parents, are we sometimes not letting them respond? That is something I know I'm even still working on. Hannah Wesolowski: Absolutely, I do it too. Again, it's like us talkers, right? We are just always looking for an opportunity to have a conversation and to jump in. Yeah, and I think giving that wait time, it brings me to another point of some kids just take a longer time to process. If you ask them a question, they might be processing and thinking about what that question is and thinking about an answer. And if we're jumping into the next answer or the next thing right away, we're not giving them time to think about their answers and develop those sentences in that language. And it can also be a really good opportunity for us to teach our older kids some of those social skills as well. Like bring them into that. I'm thinking about my daughters, for example. My older daughter is constantly on top of my younger daughter, right? So she wants to love her and kiss her, and sometimes it's like, okay, we need to create space for you physically. And that's right now, but as she starts talking, My oldest child is a talker as well. So I can foresee in the future her talking for her, but teaching her like, no, we're giving her time to talk, right? We're creating that space and having those conversations, it's teaching naturally those social skills to our older kids as well. Because we think even long term, in the work environment, we could have thoughts and sometimes we have to pause our thoughts and We can't always say our thoughts in the middle of meetings, It's a communication skill that we learn as we grow up in the workplace, but we can start that as young as three years old with their siblings. So language is Britney Suttner: for sure. Hannah Wesolowski: interconnected throughout all stages of life. Britney Suttner: Yeah, it definitely is. Now to finish out this episode, I do want to just touch back on the technology train. And I'm guessing that a lot of you said that in our first episode that you work from little littles all the way up to 18. I'm guessing a lot of your work is more with the younger kids or like younger school aged. But I'm even Hannah Wesolowski: It is. Britney Suttner: thinking about the impact of how what we watch impacts our speech. And so as parents, we can be working so hard on these skills when they're little. And then as they get older, they get to pick, you know, a different couple more TV shows or, and they're starting to pick up on how their friends talk and how these TV shows talk. And not just like words, obviously, like you don't want your kids learning swear words from the boss type thing, but even Hannah Wesolowski: Yeah. Britney Suttner: just social skills, honestly. Cause I do feel like in today's age, teenagers would much rather text the friend sitting. two people down at the lunch table from them, then they would want to you know, lean over, tap them and talk to them. what would be like your words of wisdom for parents when it comes to helping them maintain and value social skills as they get older? Hannah Wesolowski: Yeah, our children are sponges and they're observing the world around us. And I think sometimes as parents, like, again, modeling, what are we modeling within our home environments? Are we, and I'm guilty of this as well. So are we sitting on the couches scrolling on our phones while our kids are playing or are we engaging with our phones? What behavior are we as parents modeling? And again, we all need a break. You can catch me on the couch too. But what are we modeling? Are we valuing communication within our homes? Are we sitting at a dinner table and or maybe not even a dinner table? Are we outside? Are we engaging? Are we talking? Are we teaching the value of communication starting at the age of three, which then impacts us in our later teenage years? I think that The more technology that there is, like you're saying, Brittany, the less social communication that we need to have. However, there are moments where we have to communicate. We are humans and we get so much value. from life by connecting with others. And how do we do that? Like, what's going to fill your cup? Sitting and texting on a phone or sitting and having a conversation with a friend over a cup of coffee? For me, it's going to be having a conversation with a friend over a cup of coffee. And I think like as parents, we can just continue to guide our children and to continue to model those opportunities for rich communication within the homes. And we only have our babies with us for so long, right? And like when they turn 18, they My babies are little so I have a long time yet, but like life goes fast I had a You know a two month old the other day and now she's three Britney Suttner: Thank you. Hannah Wesolowski: years old. So Life moves at a quick pace. So how can we? Yeah, sit with our children and teach them those communication skills and Create moments where we can be without our devices and technology and all of the things around us to just connect Britney Suttner: Yeah. And I think even as the kids get older, it goes back to your original example of like the exchange with the ball, right? And how, Hannah Wesolowski: Absolutely. Britney Suttner: even if we have older kids, they notice if we're paying attention to what they have to say, Hannah Wesolowski: Absolutely. Britney Suttner: and if we're finding value in what they have to say. And if I'm like looking at something on my phone, say it's really important. Say I have to text somebody and finish that text. If they're standing next to me going, mom, mom, mom, mom, mom, they're noticing that I'm not looking at them. And granted, this is Hannah Wesolowski: Absolutely. Britney Suttner: a boundary we have to teach our kids. We're not available at every single second of the day, especially when they're little and they're saying, mom, watch this every three seconds. You have to have your boundaries. But at the same time, Hannah Wesolowski: Totally. Yeah. Yes. Britney Suttner: are we being good listeners? Are we teaching them how to receive communication well? And especially when it comes to making eye contact, right? This is something I know I can definitely work on because as adults, we come across people and we're like, man, that person is such a good listener. Hannah Wesolowski: Yeah. Britney Suttner: I just felt very hurt and that's because they were so present in that moment, making eye contact, maybe asking intentional questions or, you know, there's different communication skills we can develop as we get older. But like that Hannah Wesolowski: Yeah. Britney Suttner: ball analogy of like giving and receiving and both people being present and face to face, I feel like continues into, into all of life. So I, I think this was a great episode. I hope parents, no matter what your age of your kids are that you took some nuggets away from here. And I know on your website, you do talk about the services that you offer. You offer speech therapy, language, social skills. You know, I've kind of been talking about these, but you also have a little section on there that talks about parent coaching. And I thought Hannah Wesolowski: Is it? Britney Suttner: that'd be a great opportunity for you just to mention briefly about that in this episode, since we're talking so much about the parent's role in communication. So what does parent coaching look like? Hannah Wesolowski: Yeah, so parent coaching, it's really just me with another parent, another adult, and us talking about anything communication. Parents don't know what they don't know. And as a mom, I find myself being like, what don't I know? Is my child supposed to be? you know, doing this at this point, like, what can I do? And I'm on Instagram searching up reels to like try to get more information or what's right, what's not right? How do I know? This resource says this, this resource says this, am I enough? Right? Like that's ultimately what it comes down to is like, am I enough as a mom? And am I giving enough as a mom to my children? And sometimes I just wish I had a person who could sit across the table from me and say like, yes, and here's something else that you can do if you're looking for that. Or you're confused on my kiddo has autism and we can't connect. What can I do? I need someone to tell me what to do because I don't have the mental capacity to figure it out anymore. Britney Suttner: Mm-hmm. Hannah Wesolowski: let me sit across the table from you and take that off of your plate. And that's really like my main goal in that coaching is what can I do for you? What can I take off of your plate to support you as a mom in communication with your child? And I might not always have the answer, but I'm always willing to collaborate and connect and look for that answer for parents. yeah, just to service to take something off of mom's plates or dad's plates because it's a lot being a parent. Britney Suttner: I love that. I love that it's not just like, you know, specifically if they're coming to you for one of the therapy options, it's not just like in the door, Hannah Wesolowski: Totally. Britney Suttner: okay, we're going to work with the kid, okay, peace out. It's like solid communication with the parent. I'm making sure that they're comfortable. They feel informed, they feel empowered, and then giving them tips and tricks that they can keep working on it, right? In their own home. So that's Hannah Wesolowski: Absolutely. Britney Suttner: awesome. All right. This was a great, another great episode. Thank you, Hannah, Hannah Wesolowski: you Britney Suttner: for joining us for three episodes so far. We do have one more episode coming up. We're going to be narrowing the niche a little bit. This is going to be a specialized episode. for those who have a kiddo diagnosed with autism in their life. And how do we develop communication skills, not only for that child to be able to communicate well, but for us to be able to communicate with them. So this is gonna be a great episode for parents. This is gonna be great episode for caregivers, anyone who really is around kiddos with this type of diagnosis, no matter what area of the spectrum they're on. So we got one more episode coming up. Thanks, Hannah.