Latest / The Wholehearted Enneagram Podcast / Finding Level Ground with Enneagram Six Samantha Compton

Transcript

Finding Level Ground with Enneagram Six Samantha Compton · The Wholehearted Enneagram Podcast

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_03: But one thing you told me, and I have written it down in multiple places, is it's not my knowing that is going to bring level ground.
• 0:10
  SPEAKER_03: It's really an illusion of level ground.
• 0:12
  SPEAKER_03: God's knowing is fully level ground.
• 0:16
  SPEAKER_03: And the scripture in Proverbs 3, 5, and 6, trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding, and in all your ways, submit to Him, and He will make your path straight.
• 0:30
  SPEAKER_03: And I have never read that scripture with that understanding before.
• 0:36
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, now it just comes alive to me because it tells me, it reminds me that it's not me that needs to know, because he already knows.
• 0:46
  SPEAKER_03: And because he already knows, he's going before me.
• 0:51
  SPEAKER_00: Hi, my name is Amy Wicks, and I help you navigate the overwhelm and frustration of motherhood through faith, Enneagram, and simple plans.
• 1:01
  SPEAKER_00: As a faith-based Enneagram coach, I champion you to love your mothering style because you are the mom your kids need, even when you don't feel like it.
• 1:12
  SPEAKER_00: I'm a mountain mama who somehow ended up on a cul-de-sac in the Midwest, overwhelmed and frustrated by motherhood.
• 1:20
  SPEAKER_00: But the Lord didn't let me stay there.
• 1:22
  SPEAKER_00: He helped me turn the challenges of motherhood into a wholehearted decision to get intentional with my faith, my self-awareness, and my family.
• 1:32
  SPEAKER_00: Each episode of this podcast provides perspective through story, wholehearted purpose, and simple plan so you can discover how to love your mothering style and be confident that you are the mom your kids need.
• 1:45
  SPEAKER_00: Think of this podcast as your on-the-go mom pal and friend who can't help but talk about Jesus and the Enneagram.
• 1:53
  SPEAKER_00: So get to that pile of laundry, or hit the treadmill, or load up the kids in the car for that grocery run.
• 2:00
  SPEAKER_00: Get ready to be encouraged and empowered while you listen.
• 2:04
  SPEAKER_00: This is the Simply Wholehearted Podcast.
• 2:12
  SPEAKER_00: When I helped Samantha discover that she led as a type six, suddenly her life story began to click.
• 2:19
  SPEAKER_00: The decisions she made, the struggles she had, and her fierce loyalty that didn't always serve her suddenly made sense.
• 2:27
  SPEAKER_00: We first met over coffee just across the state line in Kansas at one of my favorite healthy eateries.
• 2:32
  SPEAKER_00: We chatted and planned out a false speaking event for wise women, but then the conversation turned personal.
• 2:38
  SPEAKER_00: She was fascinated by the Enneagram, yet figuring out her dominant type was such a challenge.
• 2:44
  SPEAKER_00: So she asked for my help.
• 2:45
  SPEAKER_00: Today, Samantha is going to share a little bit about her personality discovery, the freedom that she has experienced through my one-on-one coaching program, and how operating in her superpower has led to a ton of joy in her career choice.
• 2:59
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know about you, but there are some people in this life that are easy to love.
• 3:03
  SPEAKER_00: And I think you'll find Samantha Compton to be one of those folks.
• 3:06
  SPEAKER_00: By the way, we chatted about the whole-hearted Enneagram Summit coming up on August 23rd.
• 3:12
  SPEAKER_00: If you are listening this week, you can sign up for the summit today and get the details for my Christmas in July special.
• 3:19
  SPEAKER_00: It's going to be bonuses and giveaways.
• 3:21
  SPEAKER_00: You definitely want to check it out.
• 3:23
  SPEAKER_00: This virtual summit is the first of its kind.
• 3:26
  SPEAKER_00: I have packed it with well over 20 faith-based Enneagram experts to provide you with specific insights to help you overcome the communication obstacles that hinder your relationship with your kids, spouse, and even yourself.
• 3:41
  SPEAKER_00: Make sure that you're following Wholehearted Enneagram on Instagram and also getting my weekly emails so you don't miss the Christmas and July bonuses for this event.
• 3:51
  SPEAKER_00: Also, if you're interested in specific episodes about the Enneagram Type 6, check out episodes 173 in my Motherhood in Enneagram series and episode 109 in my summer in the Enneagram series from 2019.
• 4:06
  SPEAKER_00: All right, let's jump into this conversation.
• 4:08
  SPEAKER_00: I'm excited to be here.
• 4:10
  SPEAKER_00: It's very fun.
• 4:11
  SPEAKER_00: Yes.
• 4:12
  SPEAKER_00: This is when I I'm in my element because I think a lot of times, especially in the seasons where I've been able to invite my real life friends or my clients.
• 4:23
  SPEAKER_00: And I I get it's like I get to meet, I get like this group of friends to meet this group of friends.
• 4:28
  SPEAKER_00: And that's like a seven's happy place.
• 4:31
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, that is so fun.
• 4:33
  SPEAKER_00: If we can't do it in person, we're gonna do it virtually one way or another.
• 4:37
  SPEAKER_00: So this is how I roll.
• 4:38
  SPEAKER_00: That's right.
• 4:39
  SPEAKER_00: Well, I invited you on because we're doing another summer in the Enneagram series, and we're having a blast going through each and every single type.
• 4:49
  SPEAKER_00: Some people are authors, and you know, other people might have a ministry or an organization.
• 4:56
  SPEAKER_00: Our type eight is a pastor and his wife who have a thriving church and a and a book about parenting.
• 5:04
  SPEAKER_00: And so, anyway, so we have friends who are representing different arenas of life.
• 5:08
  SPEAKER_00: And so you today not only get to represent the sixes, but you also get to represent the financial planning world.
• 5:16
  SPEAKER_00: How fun is that?
• 5:17
  SPEAKER_00: That's very fun.
• 5:19
  SPEAKER_03: This is the first for me to represent those things together.
• 5:24
  SPEAKER_03: That's pretty exciting.
• 5:25
  SPEAKER_00: What I think has been fascinating is in our conversations because you have been a coaching, a wholehearted coaching client.
• 5:33
  SPEAKER_00: And so we've gone through the five sessions.
• 5:36
  SPEAKER_00: And one of the elements, I mean, I knew what you did when we first met that was part of our conversation was your work with Wise Wealth and WISE Women and all of those, you know, pieces kind of coming together in our conversation and understanding the motivations behind why you do what you do and why you're really good at what you do.
• 5:58
  SPEAKER_00: So that's been really fun.
• 6:00
  SPEAKER_03: Well, it what's been really fun about it for me is that I never knew why I was good at what I did.
• 6:08
  SPEAKER_03: In fact, I probably at times, which is so I think normal for professional women, but I think I've had a little bit of an imposter syndrome at times.
• 6:16
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 6:21
  SPEAKER_03: And uh never having had a real career, you know, this has been what 13, 14 years ago.
• 6:28
  SPEAKER_03: And a friend had suggested to me that I interview with a financial planning firm, which was hilarious to me.
• 6:36
  SPEAKER_03: Um, I had been researching and learning a lot about finances on my own, but just because I didn't, I didn't really know the financial world.
• 6:42
  SPEAKER_03: And so when they suggested to me I might do something like this, I thought it was hilarious.
• 6:47
  SPEAKER_03: I thought there's no way they're gonna hire me.
• 6:49
  SPEAKER_03: So when I did get hired, you know, I think I was just kind of like, oh wow, I I I wonder if people are wondering why I'm doing this, you know.
• 6:58
  SPEAKER_03: And I had over the years as I gained more knowledge, I think I still questioned inside of me, you know, is this really something that I'm really good at?
• 7:08
  SPEAKER_03: Or am I just really faking it well for all these years?
• 7:13
  SPEAKER_03: Really funny.
• 7:14
  SPEAKER_03: But when we started coaching and I started learning more, well, first of all, that I am a six, and that the more I learned about it, the more I realized, yes, I am a six.
• 7:24
  SPEAKER_03: And then wow, just all the things I learned about it for me in my professional life have been so affirming and confidence building, and has really helped me understand how I'm put together.
• 7:38
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 7:39
  SPEAKER_03: And I think it'll be really good for me as I learn more about the other types as I'm working with people in their finances.
• 7:45
  SPEAKER_00: So yes, absolutely.
• 7:46
  SPEAKER_00: Helping them overcome their fears and really what's going to motivate them to achieve their goals.
• 7:52
  SPEAKER_00: Yes.
• 7:52
  SPEAKER_00: Those are all instrumental.
• 7:54
  SPEAKER_00: I I think, and we might touch on this a few times, but I think that element of a six again, the six gets this uh kind of a real broad, you know, stroke is that a six is scared, a six is fearful.
• 8:08
  SPEAKER_00: You know, that's usually maybe how some people at first glance look at it.
• 8:12
  SPEAKER_00: And and and and also this anxiety-ridden creature.
• 8:16
  SPEAKER_00: Well, while those might be elements of a person and their experience and maybe well-founded, it's not the whole picture because really at the root and the core of a six, especially when they break free from their box, is that they're an amazing problem solver.
• 8:33
  SPEAKER_00: And they're not only a problem solver for themselves, but they're very aware of being a problem solver for others, which what a gift, what a gift that is.
• 8:44
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, that is um, it can be a tremendous blessing and a curse.
• 8:50
  SPEAKER_03: Because sometimes people don't want you to help their problems, especially your children.
• 8:55
  SPEAKER_03: Um, yes.
• 8:58
  SPEAKER_03: When I first read the description of a six, I honestly did not.
• 9:01
  SPEAKER_03: This is before we were meeting.
• 9:02
  SPEAKER_03: And so when I was trying to figure out what am I, which one of these am I?
• 9:08
  SPEAKER_03: And I'd see elements of myself and various ones, but when I read the six, it didn't stand out to me.
• 9:14
  SPEAKER_03: And probably because you said they're they're just scared.
• 9:17
  SPEAKER_03: Well, I would never describe myself as scared.
• 9:20
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and I feel like I've gotten very bold and have been somewhat courageous in some of my decisions.
• 9:29
  SPEAKER_03: Some of them I was forced to be courageous in.
• 9:32
  SPEAKER_03: Sure.
• 9:32
  SPEAKER_03: Yes.
• 9:33
  SPEAKER_03: But I so I didn't really identify with that.
• 9:36
  SPEAKER_03: And it wasn't until we were talking, and you were explaining some of the things that are really core and also what a healthy six looks like versus an unhealthy six.
• 9:49
  SPEAKER_03: And I can look back and see times in my life when it was flipped, when the unhealthy six was really driving, and then I could definitely describe myself as more fearful or fear-driven.
• 10:04
  SPEAKER_03: And now it's just, I mean, it's definitely still there, but I don't even label it that.
• 10:10
  SPEAKER_03: And I've just become much more aware that those things are there.
• 10:14
  SPEAKER_03: So when I begin to function in those more than I am anything else, then I know, ooh, something's not right.
• 10:22
  SPEAKER_00: Yep, yep.
• 10:23
  SPEAKER_00: I need I need a little Jesus time, a little coffee and prayer.
• 10:27
  SPEAKER_00: And that's absolutely reorient.
• 10:30
  SPEAKER_00: Yes.
• 10:31
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, that's good.
• 10:32
  SPEAKER_00: Well, kind of on that note, why don't you just share your journey for discovering your type, what that looked like, and I'll I'll interject my perspective too, because I got to intersect it at one point.
• 10:44
  SPEAKER_03: Okay, that's good.
• 10:45
  SPEAKER_03: I I think that I was reading through and I was, gosh, Amy, but I can't remember.
• 10:51
  SPEAKER_03: What was the other type that I was leaning for?
• 10:54
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, yeah, I'm pretty sure it was a type three.
• 10:56
  SPEAKER_00: Three, yeah, I think so.
• 10:58
  SPEAKER_00: You were kind of like, maybe that, and then, but you said something even then.
• 11:02
  SPEAKER_00: I felt like you were really leaning to the three, and I was like, I don't think she's a three, but yeah, yeah, and I wasn't sure either.
• 11:09
  SPEAKER_03: And because there were certain things that really rang true, and then certain things that were really not true.
• 11:14
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, pretty far from being true.
• 11:16
  SPEAKER_03: So I was like, wow, okay.
• 11:17
  SPEAKER_03: So then when you said six, and then I I thought, oh, and then the more we delved into it, I was like, oh, yes, that is definitely me.
• 11:26
  SPEAKER_03: Um, I think, and you know, one of our first sessions, you were talking about um sixes are often mistyped.
• 11:35
  SPEAKER_03: And I mean, I think that's a great example of that, um, just because of uh some core things about us.
• 11:43
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and in the session one we went over, you said that sixes passion is fear, which can lead to irrational thinking processes towards making decisions, and that that causes them to stay in a self-doubting loop, and that keeps them and their loved ones in anxiety.
• 12:00
  SPEAKER_03: Okay, well, there was a season of my life and in my parenting where that was definitely true, and so all of a sudden I kind of went, Oh, okay, I I remember a period of time like that.
• 12:13
  SPEAKER_03: Um then some other qualities that you had mentioned just about um driven by their sense of loyalty towards others.
• 12:21
  SPEAKER_03: I I know that has always been something that has driven me is loyalty.
• 12:26
  SPEAKER_03: Um and and if challenging leadership, this was really key for me.
• 12:32
  SPEAKER_03: And I think it's funny because I don't I don't know that it would always stand out unless you're a six, but it says if you're challenging leadership, it's not because you want to lead, it's really just because you want to create a space for trustworthy leadership.
• 12:48
  SPEAKER_03: And that just was like it lit me up because there's been times in my life I'm always drawn to strong leaders.
• 12:55
  SPEAKER_03: I usually want to work for strong leaders.
• 12:58
  SPEAKER_03: I like being a leader myself, but I don't, I've never really desired to be, you know, at the very top.
• 13:05
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 13:05
  SPEAKER_03: Um I've always really wanted to be a supportive, a supportive leader leading a strong leader.
• 13:11
  SPEAKER_03: But knowing that I can trust that leader is super important to me.
• 13:15
  SPEAKER_03: And when I'm not sure if that's there, it's really, really unnerving to me.
• 13:20
  SPEAKER_03: And so that actually has been a part of my uh journey in my um professional life.
• 13:28
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 13:28
  SPEAKER_03: Um, because I really wanted to, I was always looking for that.
• 13:34
  SPEAKER_03: Um, it has led me to some really great places.
• 13:36
  SPEAKER_03: It's one of the reasons I'm at Wisewell, but I didn't really know that about myself.
• 13:41
  SPEAKER_03: I see the evidence of it, but I really didn't know it until that moment.
• 13:45
  SPEAKER_00: And I went, that explains so much.
• 13:48
  SPEAKER_00: I love how the Enneagram helps us understand our story, the one that we have lived and why we ended up the places we did or with the people that we we ended up with.
• 13:59
  SPEAKER_00: And then it allows us this opportunity, okay, what has been healthy about that?
• 14:05
  SPEAKER_00: And what do I need to shake off?
• 14:06
  SPEAKER_00: And what do I need to break free from?
• 14:09
  SPEAKER_00: Because obviously, I know that there has been different times where that desire for strong leadership has also led to choices that weren't healthy ultimately for the long run.
• 14:19
  SPEAKER_00: And so as the Lord has has shaped your story and create, you know, created this first love and this first place in your life, how that's been able to, you've been able to gravitate towards the healthy leaders who where you you have permission to challenge to make sure they are trustworthy, but then you're also in simultaneously attracted to the trustworthy people that you do have the space to ask the hard questions to make that is true.
• 14:48
  SPEAKER_03: That's so good.
• 14:50
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I think in an unhealthy place, I was definitely attracted to unhealthy leadership in my life.
• 14:56
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and as I have gotten healthier, but thou the grace of God and his healing in my life, that is what you know, his leadership is always trustworthy.
• 15:08
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 15:08
  SPEAKER_03: His leadership is always full of wisdom and mercy and kindness.
• 15:14
  SPEAKER_03: And so the closer in I draw to that, then the more I am also attracted to others who have that kind of leadership.
• 15:23
  SPEAKER_03: So that is an amazing transformation that happens when you lean into him for those things.
• 15:28
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I couldn't agree more.
• 15:30
  SPEAKER_00: It's so true.
• 15:31
  SPEAKER_00: And that is the that's where the transformation can happen.
• 15:34
  SPEAKER_00: The Enneagram gives us language, it gives us self-awareness, and then the Lord helps us break free and bust through the box and the limitations.
• 15:43
  SPEAKER_00: Definitely.
• 15:44
  SPEAKER_00: If you don't mind, I would love it if you kind of gave your why you decided to explore the Enneagram a little bit more in Enneagram coaching.
• 15:52
  SPEAKER_00: What piqued your curiosity, or what was the that moment that you're like, I think I could really benefit from getting a little bit more help instead of just relying on memes or a book, because that's that is often where plenty of people they might listen to a podcast and stuff like that.
• 16:09
  SPEAKER_00: And that's good.
• 16:10
  SPEAKER_00: But what made you go that one step further?
• 16:13
  SPEAKER_03: I think there were a couple of things.
• 16:15
  SPEAKER_03: I think over the years I've done different personality tests.
• 16:19
  SPEAKER_03: I find those fascinating.
• 16:20
  SPEAKER_03: I've always, you know, those were really interesting and it was really interesting.
• 16:24
  SPEAKER_03: I am a people person, I really love understanding the people around me.
• 16:29
  SPEAKER_03: And so I've always kind of wanted to know what their personality type is.
• 16:33
  SPEAKER_03: But you know, it's never really been very productive.
• 16:36
  SPEAKER_03: It's like, well, this person is this, but I mean, what does that really do for me?
• 16:42
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, how's that helped me?
• 16:43
  SPEAKER_03: Um in a in a slightly deeper way.
• 16:47
  SPEAKER_03: And so I had some friends who were talking about Enneagram, and I was like, I I don't even know what that is.
• 16:53
  SPEAKER_03: It sounds like an I don't even know.
• 16:55
  SPEAKER_03: Right.
• 16:55
  SPEAKER_03: How do you think it's the sorcery?
• 16:58
  SPEAKER_03: I don't know what this is.
• 17:00
  SPEAKER_03: And so yes, so I read a book about it, and I honestly just still didn't get it because I I still was struggling with understanding what I was.
• 17:11
  SPEAKER_03: So it was that, and then I'm mothering teenagers.
• 17:17
  SPEAKER_00: So they prayer for us all.
• 17:20
  SPEAKER_03: So we have three children.
• 17:22
  SPEAKER_03: Uh, my husband and I were a blended family, so I have a 24 and a 16-year-old, and he has a 17-year-old.
• 17:30
  SPEAKER_03: And so we've been married for six years, and I, especially with my youngest, I really wanted to understand her better because we are very different.
• 17:42
  SPEAKER_03: We're we're similar in many ways, but we're the areas that were different were very different.
• 17:46
  SPEAKER_03: Are very challenging.
• 17:48
  SPEAKER_03: Very, yeah, and that those differences have become very challenging.
• 17:52
  SPEAKER_03: And one day she came home with this printout um from somebody, I think it was one of her counselors or something at school.
• 18:00
  SPEAKER_03: She goes to a Christian school and sent home this um printout, and it said it was her Enneagram type, and it said she was a seven.
• 18:09
  SPEAKER_03: And so I'm reading this description, and I'm like, are you kidding me?
• 18:14
  SPEAKER_03: This could not be more accurate.
• 18:16
  SPEAKER_03: It was like a textbook about my daughter.
• 18:20
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, and so I thought, wow, okay.
• 18:22
  SPEAKER_03: And then it talked a little bit about how that personality type relates to other personality types.
• 18:28
  SPEAKER_03: And so, of course, I didn't know which one I was to know how they were going to relate.
• 18:32
  SPEAKER_03: Yes.
• 18:33
  SPEAKER_03: So then I was in a another coaching group and I heard somebody that I respect very much, and she had mentioned your name.
• 18:39
  SPEAKER_03: And so I'm like, oh, I'm finding her.
• 18:41
  SPEAKER_03: So I found you and messaged you, and you were so kind to message me back.
• 18:46
  SPEAKER_03: And then we um yeah, we met, and and the rest is history, but I I I honestly tell people, I mean, just the other day I was in my office and I was talking to somebody that I work with, and I said, honestly, this has helped me more than anything I've done in a very long time.
• 19:06
  SPEAKER_03: And I don't even know that I can verbalize it.
• 19:09
  SPEAKER_03: So today I'm trying.
• 19:10
  SPEAKER_03: Um, but I think it's just really knowing how God has put me together and that I am not, I am not an I don't have to be such an enigma to myself, if that makes sense.
• 19:23
  SPEAKER_03: Yes.
• 19:23
  SPEAKER_03: I don't have to be, and I don't have to wonder, well, am I this or am I that?
• 19:28
  SPEAKER_03: Or um, you know, why did I make that decision and in in my life?
• 19:32
  SPEAKER_03: Why have I seemed to, you know, go do this, but then I'm over here and I don't, you know, it just it helps.
• 19:38
  SPEAKER_03: It makes me feel like I'm congruent, like there is integrity in all of it because it's it's all intentional.
• 19:47
  SPEAKER_03: And also as a mom, that like you tell me on a regular basis, you are the mom that God chose for your daughter, and that was not on accident.
• 19:58
  SPEAKER_03: You have what it takes and you have what she needs.
• 20:01
  SPEAKER_03: And so um, that has been that has just been tremendous.
• 20:06
  SPEAKER_00: Well, it's been awesome to I I've loved working with you, and I haven't hesitated to say this that you're just you're teachable too.
• 20:13
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, I think that's the key for you know you're ready for coaching when you realize that you have something to learn about yourself.
• 20:20
  SPEAKER_00: And whether it's health coaching, financial coaching, emotional coaching, what you know, whatever it is.
• 20:26
  SPEAKER_00: And I would say that about therapy too.
• 20:28
  SPEAKER_00: People tend to put therapy in the category of something's very broken or wrong.
• 20:32
  SPEAKER_00: Um, but a lot of these, it just takes that acknowledgement of going, oh, I don't know everything.
• 20:37
  SPEAKER_00: And I I could use a guide who's at least a few steps ahead of me who could help me out.
• 20:42
  SPEAKER_00: And I I love that so you've come very teachable in the process.
• 20:46
  SPEAKER_00: And one of the reasons we met too is we're gonna get to do a um a luncheon for wise women and maybe do some other stuff with wise wealth and super excited about that.
• 20:58
  SPEAKER_00: But but the fact that we could connect and I could that I could understand your story without even knowing you.
• 21:06
  SPEAKER_00: I I think that's the power of the Enneagram for other people.
• 21:09
  SPEAKER_00: Like you said, you could read this paper and it articulated uh the motivations of your daughter in a way that you've been trying to kind of dissect and understand yourself, but it helps me.
• 21:22
  SPEAKER_00: I don't have to be your type to fully understand the struggle or the wrestler or the doubts or the or the what you need to hear.
• 21:30
  SPEAKER_03: Um and I think, especially with the teenager, like you can look and you can say, Well, she does this and she does that, she does that.
• 21:38
  SPEAKER_03: But if you don't understand why, then it's just either an irritation or if it's not an irritation, you know, maybe there's no emotion attached to it, but you you don't have depth.
• 21:51
  SPEAKER_03: And and you also like it's helping me know how I can better lead my daughter.
• 21:56
  SPEAKER_00: Yes.
• 21:57
  SPEAKER_03: Because if I want to.
• 22:00
  SPEAKER_03: To help her.
• 22:02
  SPEAKER_03: And you know, that's really our role as parents at different levels in their lives.
• 22:06
  SPEAKER_03: When they're teenagers, they're getting ready to leave the nest.
• 22:09
  SPEAKER_03: And so, you know, we're letting go more and more, which by the way, four or six is really hard.
• 22:14
  SPEAKER_03: Um, but really, I want to I want to be listening for the Lord's wisdom and also recognize the opportunities that she has to learn the things that she needs and she's going to have to have in her life.
• 22:29
  SPEAKER_03: And if I can see beneath the behaviors to really some of those core things that she needs, then I can lead her better, or even just share um, you know, God's wisdom with her in a way that's not just surface.
• 22:44
  SPEAKER_03: It's going over to the core of who she is.
• 22:47
  SPEAKER_00: Ah, that's so good.
• 22:49
  SPEAKER_00: I I like to, we've talked about this a little bit, especially our last session recently, was um the Enneagram, this is where for you as a businesswoman and as a financial planner, it's going to help you serve your people even in a more powerful way.
• 23:05
  SPEAKER_00: Because you can, I mean, it's not like you can type everybody uh, you know, necessarily right off the bat or anything, but as you work with people and you hear their fears, you understand you start looking for the motivation behind it.
• 23:18
  SPEAKER_00: Um, because there's, you know, there's not just like one way to do something.
• 23:24
  SPEAKER_00: And it's about being able to come in and give something that's really thoughtful and custom and comfortable for the client who's making some big, big decisions and choices.
• 23:37
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, definitely.
• 23:38
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, most of the people that I work with, because of the nature of what I do, I really focus on income and retirement planning.
• 23:46
  SPEAKER_03: And so when I'm meeting with people, a lot probably, you know, even though I specialize really um in teaching women's investments and um teaching uh financial issues that affect women, most of my clients are couples.
• 24:02
  SPEAKER_03: And so when couples come in, it is I can maybe count on one hand the couples that really are very similar in their personalities, right?
• 24:14
  SPEAKER_03: The other ones are you know so different.
• 24:17
  SPEAKER_03: And a lot of times they've even stopped talking about finances because finances are already a trigger.
• 24:23
  SPEAKER_03: Right.
• 24:24
  SPEAKER_03: And so if you already have a trigger because of something you grew up with and that's affected the way you see finances, or it's created certain fears or uh ways of dealing with finances, if the faster I can pick up on the differences and also what is causing fear for them or what brings security for them, the more helpful I can be in leading them both together towards a solution and also finding a way to help them be able to communicate about those things in a way that they can hear each other.
• 24:56
  SPEAKER_00: Yes.
• 24:56
  SPEAKER_03: Because a lot of times couples, when they're talking about their finances, they're using words based on what they've learned over their lives.
• 25:05
  SPEAKER_03: But sometimes those words mean different things to each other.
• 25:09
  SPEAKER_03: And so the other one may not understand.
• 25:11
  SPEAKER_03: Well, when you say this, you know, but they don't when they're just by themselves, they don't go, well, what do you mean by that?
• 25:16
  SPEAKER_00: No, not at all.
• 25:18
  SPEAKER_00: We're so impatient.
• 25:19
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, exactly.
• 25:20
  SPEAKER_03: So I think this is very helpful for me too, and just uh learning how to pick up on some of those things and be able to again lead and in what God has called me to do in that situation um better and be wiser in those moments and help create better long-term solutions for people as they're going into this phase of life.
• 25:41
  SPEAKER_03: That's already, you know, a little, it can be like, oh, this is new and different.
• 25:45
  SPEAKER_03: Are we gonna do okay?
• 25:46
  SPEAKER_03: And so there's already some innate fear in that.
• 25:49
  SPEAKER_03: And so being able to bring um just more, just better solutions.
• 25:54
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 25:55
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, no, that is that is really good.
• 25:57
  SPEAKER_00: We we talked about this one of the first meetings that we were together because we were talking about okay, what would be a great thing to offer wise women, wise wealth, and all of that.
• 26:06
  SPEAKER_00: Because I have a whole lesson or a couple sessions on Enneagram subtypes because it's the subtypes that illuminate how we interact with finances specifically, and then also how we engage in intimacy as it relates to not just marriage but in friendship.
• 26:24
  SPEAKER_00: And um, those are those are just so informative because a lot of times we divide it.
• 26:29
  SPEAKER_00: Well, there's a saver or a spender, but it's more nuanced than that.
• 26:33
  SPEAKER_00: There's it's way more complicated, not only culture, origin, your story, how how does that play into it?
• 26:41
  SPEAKER_00: But then those natural the subtypes play into how you're going to engage and make that decision.
• 26:47
  SPEAKER_00: And um for us as a couple, because we're Dave Ramsey people, we're we teach financial peace, and you know, that is the language of it.
• 26:56
  SPEAKER_00: But I know going through it 13 years ago, I was like, well, it's not it's not as clear cut as that because we're just a little bit of both, but I we were trying to figure out why.
• 27:04
  SPEAKER_00: But in the last few years, as I've dove into the subtypes and um begun to just research what that, how those represent and play out in those arenas, uh that has been transformative when we do talk about money.
• 27:17
  SPEAKER_00: In fact, we this week we were talking about money, and it really helped me to keep that in mind of okay, my husband's motivated in this way, and this is why the response is for him, and then this is why I'm responding the way or what I want.
• 27:33
  SPEAKER_00: Now I can know why I want, and not necessarily label it bad or good, because I think in finances, sometimes we we are an either or when it's not oftentimes that clear, it's just a motivation of like your motivation is different than mine.
• 27:48
  SPEAKER_00: It's not because it's bad, it's just different.
• 27:50
  SPEAKER_00: And so it's it's learning then to compromise, and in a marriage relationship, you know, considering the other and go, okay, well, if that's really valuable to you to you, then then I want to do that thing or invest that way, or save that way, or spend that way.
• 28:07
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, that's good.
• 28:08
  SPEAKER_03: I can't wait to learn more about the subtypes and uh in those areas.
• 28:13
  SPEAKER_03: I think that's gonna be very beneficial.
• 28:14
  SPEAKER_03: I'm super excited for you to come and share with the wise women group in the luncheon in September, and then also um possibly with WiseWelph as well.
• 28:23
  SPEAKER_00: So yeah, this is gonna be very good.
• 28:25
  SPEAKER_00: I know it's good.
• 28:26
  SPEAKER_00: It's I you know Can you ever know everything about the Enneagram?
• 28:31
  SPEAKER_00: I don't think so.
• 28:32
  SPEAKER_00: I think that what's been so fun is as you know, there's going to be an Enneagram summit in August that I'm hosting, and it's just around the corner now.
• 28:41
  SPEAKER_00: But I've been recording at like upwards of 24 sessions, and it's gonna air over a span of a week.
• 28:49
  SPEAKER_00: But um, but I and I'm so thrilled because I got some amazing teachers and coaches who who got involved in this.
• 28:55
  SPEAKER_00: And I have loved sitting and listening.
• 28:58
  SPEAKER_00: I'm not really sitting, I'm standing and listening, and I feel like I'm part of the audience who's who's gaining new things.
• 29:05
  SPEAKER_00: And I I'm certainly not, I mean, because we have someone like Marilyn Van Sill who's done 30 years of Enneagram teaching and research and learning.
• 29:13
  SPEAKER_00: So 30 years, like that's awesome.
• 29:16
  SPEAKER_00: So of course, she had a lot of good stuff.
• 29:19
  SPEAKER_00: And I was like, just keep telling me, can we keep talking?
• 29:23
  SPEAKER_00: Can we do it every week?
• 29:25
  SPEAKER_03: I I think when I first signed um up to do some sessions with you, I think in my mind, I was thinking, okay, I'll learn a little bit about my daughter, but really I am doing this for professional reasons and or you know, professional development and for myself.
• 29:43
  SPEAKER_03: And oh my goodness, how much of what percentage of time do you think we've spent on the parenting?
• 29:49
  SPEAKER_03: I know, I know.
• 29:50
  SPEAKER_03: Um I don't have little kids anymore, so I probably won't, you know, spend that much time on it.
• 29:55
  SPEAKER_03: I'm it's probably 90%.
• 29:58
  SPEAKER_03: It's a lot.
• 30:00
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, and you know, we talked about this, is where like I I know it, it it's just those things that that trip us up.
• 30:09
  SPEAKER_00: We have these areas in our life that we need just a little bit of help from, and we don't maybe even realize it.
• 30:13
  SPEAKER_00: Like we've talked about there's reasons why we have health coaches and financial coaches and different things for for different, but really what it is it's inviting an outside perspective to be able to help speak truth and navigate these things because what you've traversed is really challenging, it's really hard, and and yet you've been willing to learn.
• 30:36
  SPEAKER_00: And it's I don't know, I just get excited every single time that I work through it's the same content with a different person and go these core truths are gonna help every single time if you can just put them into practice and if you're willing to learn.
• 30:52
  SPEAKER_03: I want to share um a core truth that you shared with me, if that's okay, because it's been so uh life-giving and so good.
• 31:03
  SPEAKER_03: So you told me, because we were talking about being a planner and wanting to know.
• 31:10
  SPEAKER_03: I said, you know, knowing what's ahead or just being in the know.
• 31:15
  SPEAKER_03: For me, that is what feels like level ground.
• 31:18
  SPEAKER_03: So, and I'm always looking for the level ground, like, okay, where is it?
• 31:22
  SPEAKER_03: And sometimes I'm very annoying because I ask so many questions, you know, I want to know this, you know, what are we gonna do here?
• 31:29
  SPEAKER_03: You know, I'm asking my kids, okay, have you planned for this?
• 31:31
  SPEAKER_03: And what about this?
• 31:32
  SPEAKER_03: And and my husband has a planning side too.
• 31:35
  SPEAKER_03: So between the two of us, I'm sure we drive people insane around.
• 31:39
  SPEAKER_03: Um, but that makes me feel better because in my mind I can picture, okay, this is how things will probably go, or somewhere in this, you know, somewhere like this.
• 31:48
  SPEAKER_03: And when it doesn't go like that, or when it's just completely unknown, or when people don't respond with what might happen, um, it feels very unnerving to me.
• 31:59
  SPEAKER_03: And I it does produce anxiety.
• 32:01
  SPEAKER_03: I and I was not even recognizing it as anxiety.
• 32:05
  SPEAKER_03: And I thought that was good that we recognize that.
• 32:08
  SPEAKER_00: Um just call it what it is, right?
• 32:10
  SPEAKER_00: And call it out.
• 32:11
  SPEAKER_03: Yes, yes, because that's gonna help me in the future be aware of when I'm doing that.
• 32:16
  SPEAKER_03: But one thing you told me, and I have written it down in multiple places, is it's not my knowing that is going to bring level ground.
• 32:27
  SPEAKER_03: It's really an illusion of level ground.
• 32:29
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, but God's knowing is fully level ground.
• 32:34
  SPEAKER_03: And the scripture in Proverbs 3, 5, and 6 trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding, and in all your ways, submit to him, and he will make your path straight.
• 32:48
  SPEAKER_03: And I have never read that scripture with that understanding before.
• 32:54
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, now it just comes alive to me because it tells me it reminds me that it's not me that needs to know, because he already knows, and because he already knows, he's going before me and to make the path straight, and that I can trust him in all things, and I can lean not on my own understanding.
• 33:15
  SPEAKER_03: Is that not a perfect description of a six is wanting to lean on their own understanding?
• 33:20
  SPEAKER_03: So this has become a a verse now for me that just um it's just very um comforting to you, and it's also a reminder of how powerful, how great and good my God is.
• 33:37
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, it brings it to a tangible level.
• 33:41
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, suddenly it's those words that you have read before, but now they're in a new light.
• 33:48
  SPEAKER_00: Yes.
• 33:48
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, this is the anchor.
• 33:50
  SPEAKER_00: This is the anchor I needed.
• 33:52
  SPEAKER_00: I love that.
• 33:52
  SPEAKER_00: That is so powerful.
• 33:54
  SPEAKER_00: Well, girl, I don't know about you, but this has been so much fun.
• 33:59
  SPEAKER_00: We have covered a lot of different things.
• 34:02
  SPEAKER_00: I don't even know how long we've talked, but I would love it.
• 34:06
  SPEAKER_00: Um, just in closing here and finishing up, if you could, if you just had one more thing that you wanted to share too, whether it's an Enneagram six who's listening and um they just, you know, you feel like they need to know this thing, um, or someone who loves a six and something they need to learn about them.
• 34:24
  SPEAKER_00: And then if you could just share a little bit about wise women and wise wealth and maybe how they can find some more information on that.
• 34:30
  SPEAKER_03: Okay.
• 34:31
  SPEAKER_03: I think for sixes um to know about yourself and also what people that love you might want to know is I think six is at the core, you know, they they love their people and they want to protect their people.
• 34:46
  SPEAKER_03: And so a lot of what they're motivated by is that is to protect.
• 34:53
  SPEAKER_03: And it's difficult to let go sometimes and just allow the Lord to have that and to have those things and to have those people because he hasn't called us to carry it at the level that we feel like we should or need to.
• 35:09
  SPEAKER_03: And and that, I think understanding that about myself, um, why I'm you know what I'm motivated by and what it means when I am all of a sudden functioning in a high place of anxiety, or um just constantly thinking about those things.
• 35:27
  SPEAKER_03: I'm realizing that, oh, I've just stepped into trying to do things in my own strength.
• 35:32
  SPEAKER_03: And maybe I've been there for a period of time already.
• 35:36
  SPEAKER_03: So then going back to a place of being centered on him is what is gonna bring peace, not figuring out the things.
• 35:43
  SPEAKER_03: That's never gonna bring the peace.
• 35:45
  SPEAKER_03: Right.
• 35:46
  SPEAKER_03: Right.
• 35:46
  SPEAKER_03: So that's that's a good word.
• 35:49
  SPEAKER_03: On that, so you're gonna be sharing with wise women.
• 35:52
  SPEAKER_03: I'm super excited about that.
• 35:54
  SPEAKER_03: So wise women uh meets in Lee Summit on the second Thursday of every month.
• 36:00
  SPEAKER_03: You can go to wisewomen.education, just wisewomen.education is our website.
• 36:05
  SPEAKER_03: But it started four years ago as an is it is an educational group.
• 36:10
  SPEAKER_03: Um, because of my history as a single parent and a single woman and learning financial things.
• 36:17
  SPEAKER_03: I really am passionate about sharing that knowledge and also providing an environment where women can share with each other and sharpen each other and encourage each other in financial things.
• 36:28
  SPEAKER_03: But I always say, as we know, women are not good at compartmentalizing.
• 36:33
  SPEAKER_03: So everything in our lives affects our finances.
• 36:37
  SPEAKER_03: So about four times a year, I actually do a full session on finances, but the rest of the time we have various speakers that are talking about different things.
• 36:46
  SPEAKER_03: And Wise Women really is about guiding women investors on a path to financial significance where they are free to give, serve, and live like never before.
• 36:57
  SPEAKER_03: And so the luncheon focuses on those things as we learn together and grow together.
• 37:03
  SPEAKER_03: And um, I'm just super excited.
• 37:06
  SPEAKER_03: So we we eat together a fabulous meal, um, we have a little fun together, we get to know each other.
• 37:12
  SPEAKER_03: It's not a networking group, but I'm telling you, natural outworking of getting together is that they network and they help each other and they support each other.
• 37:22
  SPEAKER_03: So you're going to be the speaker um in September.
• 37:25
  SPEAKER_03: And that is on the website now with dates and the details and all that kind of thing.
• 37:29
  SPEAKER_03: So, and then Wise Wealth is who I work for.
• 37:33
  SPEAKER_03: So Wise Wealth is a financial firm.
• 37:36
  SPEAKER_03: We are a registered investment advisory firm and we do fiduciary planning.
• 37:40
  SPEAKER_03: So WISE Women is under the umbrella of Wise Wealth, is just something that um we do as an educational piece.
• 37:47
  SPEAKER_00: I love it.
• 37:48
  SPEAKER_00: So good.
• 37:49
  SPEAKER_00: It's so needed.
• 37:50
  SPEAKER_00: And it's it's one of those things.
• 37:52
  SPEAKER_00: It's one thing to do financial piece and go through that and and get a firm grasp on your household income.
• 38:00
  SPEAKER_00: But I really think that most of us, I would say probably 95% of us, we need to be meeting with the experts in this industry and in this field to help us take that next step with our finances when we're when we're on that baby step.
• 38:14
  SPEAKER_00: Because um, yeah, I just don't think it's something we should necessarily navigate alone and do it with people who who can guide you.
• 38:20
  SPEAKER_00: And um, yeah, that this is their job and they have your best interests in mind.
• 38:24
  SPEAKER_00: So for my friends out there, check out Wise Wealth, Wise Women, and if anyone's local, we'd love to have you join in September for the Wise Women luncheon.
• 38:32
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, that would be great.
• 38:34
  SPEAKER_00: Yay, thank you, Samantha.
• 38:35
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you so much again.
• 38:37
  SPEAKER_03: Thank you so much.
• 38:38
  SPEAKER_03: And I just want to say if anybody is thinking about working with Amy, it'll be better than you can think it would be.
• 38:44
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, you just are so good at listening and understanding.
• 38:48
  SPEAKER_03: And I felt very safe to be vulnerable.
• 38:51
  SPEAKER_03: And that's I think where you know, use that I'm teachable.
• 38:55
  SPEAKER_03: It helps when you're working with somebody that you feel is trustworthy and is uh really just there to help.
• 39:02
  SPEAKER_03: And so I appreciate what all that you do.
• 39:04
  SPEAKER_03: I'm so thankful for this time.
• 39:06
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, thank you, Samantha.
• 39:07
  SPEAKER_00: I'm gonna treasure those words.
• 39:08
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you.
• 39:09
  SPEAKER_03: Yes, you're welcome.
• 39:12
  SPEAKER_00: I pray that today's conversation was an encouragement to you, no matter what your personality type is.
• 39:18
  SPEAKER_00: I know that we all need reminders to study ourselves on the solid ground that Christ's salvation and peace offers to us on a daily basis.
• 39:27
  SPEAKER_00: I also hope that if you happen to be a local Kansas City person, that you're gonna check out Wise Women and join us at our in-person event this September.
• 39:37
  SPEAKER_00: All the details are linked in the show notes.
• 39:40
  SPEAKER_00: Also, if you know a friend who would like to join our Summer in the Enneagram series, I hope that you'll send them this episode or any of the 200 plus previous episodes so they can join the fun.
• 39:51
  SPEAKER_00: And don't forget to invite your friends to the wholehearted Enneagram Summit.
• 39:55
  SPEAKER_00: There's going to be such high-quality information that you're gonna want to have some people to talk through the content.
• 40:00
  SPEAKER_00: Many of our speakers will have follow-up resources to put your new knowledge into action.
• 40:05
  SPEAKER_00: The event is free and the registration page is live and ready for you to check out.
• 40:11
  SPEAKER_00: Remember, you are the mom your kids need.
• 40:15
  SPEAKER_00: Continue to pursue perspective, purpose, and plans for the whole hearted life you desire.