Latest / Limitless Living with Fredricka Davis / 035: Finding Your Word: The One Word That Can Change Your Next Chapter

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035: Finding Your Word: The One Word That Can Change Your Next Chapter · Limitless Living with Fredricka Davis

• 0:32
  Hello, and welcome to the Limitless Living Podcast.
• 0:36
  I'm your host, Frederica Davis, a coach, entrepreneur, wellness advocate, speaker, and most importantly, someone who believes it is never too late to reset your life, reconnect with yourself, and create the future that feels aligned with who you truly are.
• 0:57
  So here on Limitless Living, we talk about wellness and mindset, purpose, personal growth, entrepreneurship, relationships, and all the things that help us create lives that feel as good on the inside as they look on the outside.
• 1:14
  So today is sustainable success, a Tuesday.
• 1:19
  And I am so happy to be back here recording this and uh talking to all of you.
• 1:25
  I was away teaching at a retreat in Costa Rica, and I'm going to tell you a little bit more about that.
• 1:31
  It's going to unfold.
• 1:32
  You'll hear more bits and pieces as we go forward in some of our upcoming episodes as well.
• 1:38
  And uh, if you're wondering where the episodes were, as I went away, I found myself needing some rest and recuperation.
• 1:51
  And in the moments that I thought I would be doing the podcast, I had to listen to my body.
• 1:58
  And I will tell you a little bit very briefly.
• 2:00
  Uh, when I went to Costa Rica, for those of you who are listening in the US, you may not know much about medical tourism, but it's a very big thing all around the world.
• 2:09
  And I've been seeing a dentist in Costa Rica, uh, off and on for a handful of years, doing some kind of major dental work.
• 2:18
  And I've had many dentists in the United States.
• 2:21
  So, long story short, not to make this a show about dentistry today, but I went down to have some more dentistry done.
• 2:29
  And I had a little bit of dental surgery while I was down there.
• 2:32
  And I did this before I was going up into the rainforest, into up into the mountains in Costa Rica and to this weeklong retreat.
• 2:44
  And I was going to be a facilitator.
• 2:46
  So there it was, and I had all these blocked times that I thought, oh, I'm going to catch up on this, I'm going to catch up on that, and I'm going to record them, and they'll be all recorded and scheduled and everything for during the retreat.
• 2:59
  And when I got there, quite honestly, I had the dental surgery.
• 3:05
  And after all of the preparation to get there and being there and the little time changes and all of that, my body needed rest.
• 3:17
  So that's what I did.
• 3:19
  So I had to make a few judgment calls in order to heal appropriately and to go up into the mountains and not be overly um tired and pushing too hard for things.
• 3:36
  So that is why you are missing a few podcasts.
• 3:41
  Should that scenario arise again, I will handle it a little bit differently, but I am so excited to be back, you know?
• 3:49
  And today is, I hope, going to be one of these moments that you listen and you think, ah, I never really thought about something like that.
• 3:58
  And it really gives you an aha moment.
• 4:01
  That's what I'm hoping for today.
• 4:02
  So my question as I start off today is going to be how often or have you ever started thinking to yourself or found yourself asking, is this all there is?
• 4:17
  What do I want next?
• 4:19
  Why don't I feel as fulfilled as I thought I would?
• 4:22
  Or maybe how do I stop surviving and start really living?
• 4:28
  I'm tired of surviving and I want more, right?
• 4:32
  If you thought anything like that at all, then today is where you need to be.
• 4:39
  You are in the right place.
• 4:41
  So I want to talk about something that is really deceptively simple and that has become very meaningful to me, incredibly meaningful.
• 4:54
  And this is your word.
• 4:57
  Now, maybe you've done something like this where you've thought about and you know, developed a word, maybe it became your mantra for a year or something like that.
• 5:05
  But if you haven't, and even if you have, I want you to follow along with me.
• 5:10
  This is not about this being a word that's your favorite word.
• 5:15
  It's not about picking a trendy word or a word that sounds good on social media or for your brand.
• 5:23
  It's not anything like that.
• 5:25
  Uh, what I'm talking about is figuring out what your uh your word is and talking about how this word can quite literally become your compass.
• 5:40
  So a word that reminds you of who you are becoming, and a word that helps guide your decisions when life gets busy, gets noisy, gets messy, because you know as well as I do, it will, no matter what our best efforts are, there will be moments where it just gets messy and it's easy to get derailed.
• 6:05
  So this is something that brings you back kind of as your compass, grounds you and reminds you.
• 6:14
  So, you know, I was in Costa Rica and uh I was a facilitator as well as a participant at a women's retreat, which was just phenomenal.
• 6:26
  The food, the surroundings, the the rainforest, the people.
• 6:31
  Honestly, it was a wonderful experience.
• 6:36
  And being there as a facilitator and a participant, I was able to not only teach and lead, I was there to also learn and listen and observe.
• 6:54
  And I laughed and I cried and I connected with women from many different countries, many different backgrounds.
• 7:04
  And, you know, some are retirees, some were entrepreneurs, some were navigating a pretty fresh loss, and some were figuring out what the next chapter of their lives might look like, or in their healing process, in rebuilding.
• 7:21
  And some were dreaming bigger than they had allowed themselves to dream in years.
• 7:27
  And throughout the retreat, one question that kept resurfacing as a theme throughout all of us, uh, as we facilitated all of the instructors, the coaches, as I was doing, was really who are you?
• 7:47
  So it's who are you now?
• 7:49
  Not who were you, not who others expect you to be, but who are you now?
• 8:01
  And who are you becoming?
• 8:06
  So we went through a series of different reflecting questions and coming up with your word.
• 8:13
  This is something I've done before.
• 8:15
  This time was a little different though, and while I was there and I went through this whole process, my word came up, and um, you know, I had to really think about it and reflect on this.
• 8:34
  And there are many words it could have been for me, because if you're like me, you probably feel, especially since we had the pandemic, my lord.
• 8:42
  Uh, you know, from the pandemic, from what's going on in the world, from the disconnection from all of us being in social media and the AI and all the changes that happen around us all the time.
• 8:53
  And as we age and the different stages of life and all these different things, right?
• 8:59
  If we are all being honest, and if I'm being honest, the last few years or more have changed me.
• 9:06
  In fact, throughout my life, there's always been periods of time that have changed me.
• 9:11
  And that means, you know, life has changed me, business has changed me, law has changed me.
• 9:17
  My God, I went through nine funerals in one year.
• 9:23
  That is enough to rock you.
• 9:26
  I mean, right?
• 9:27
  Think about that.
• 9:28
  Health challenges.
• 9:29
  I've talked about some of my health challenges on the show before that have occurred in the last five years in a big way since the pandemic.
• 9:40
  And relationships even have changed.
• 9:42
  You know, friends come, they go, um, co-workers, team members, uh, you know, relationships change, they evolve, they have their ebbs and their flows, all those things, right?
• 9:54
  And success changes you, it has changed me.
• 9:58
  Failure has changed me, and I could keep going on and on and on.
• 10:01
  I'm hoping as you're listening to this, this is landing with you, and you can relate to some of this because all these changes, not necessarily good or bad, they're just changes and it's evolution, it's the process of living and experiencing life.
• 10:16
  I started to ask myself during this exercise, and it was posed to us if I had to choose one word, only one word, to represent this season of my life and where I'm moving forward to, what would that word be?
• 10:41
  So, you know, at first some of the words that popped into my head were kind of obvious, like purpose, growth, healing.
• 10:49
  I mean, if you've listened to my podcast, or if you've come in to my wellness center, or if you've talked to me and had a conversation with me, those would all resonate, right?
• 10:57
  Or freedom, impact, uh, transformation.
• 11:03
  All phenomenal, beautiful, powerful words.
• 11:07
  But none of them, even though they popped into my head, none of them were quite right.
• 11:13
  So I kept going through this exercise and I kept journaling a little bit and thinking about this, and it really kept coming back to um, you know, as I was praying, reflecting, and thinking and so on, one word, and it was limitless.
• 11:29
  Go figure, right?
• 11:30
  We have the limitless living podcast.
• 11:32
  We have the limitless living for women who want more private Facebook community.
• 11:38
  My trademark brand uh method is the limitless reset method.
• 11:43
  So go figure.
• 11:45
  But I had not looked at it that way until then.
• 11:49
  So if you're listening right now, you might just automatically be thinking that you know what limitless might mean.
• 11:59
  Because most people who would hear the word limitless would probably immediately think, oh, bigger goals, more money, more success, or more achievement or more accomplishment, basically more, right?
• 12:11
  Limitless, bigger, more, you know.
• 12:14
  But that's not actually what it meant to me when it landed.
• 12:20
  And not actually at all.
• 12:23
  Those are all wonderful things, yes, but the deeper meaning uh really became moving to me.
• 12:31
  And it wasn't as much of a surprise as it was kind of like this ahlah moment, this big aha moment.
• 12:38
  And what I realized is that my word wasn't about what I wanted to accomplish.
• 12:45
  The word limitless in all that I do isn't about what I want to accomplish.
• 12:49
  Yes, we all want to accomplish things, but it's really about how I want to live and how I want to help others live as well.
• 13:03
  So for me, the word limitless means refusing to be confined by limitations, especially the limitations that no longer belong to me.
• 13:15
  I mean, these are the old stories that we have going on that play on repeat in our heads and our hearts, our souls, our guts, because maybe they've been told to us over and over and over again, or maybe they're stories we started to tell ourselves or make up in our heads, or society told us, whatever they are, right?
• 13:35
  They equal limits.
• 13:37
  Maybe it's old fears, okay?
• 13:40
  So limitless means that I'm no longer confined.
• 13:44
  I do not want to be confined, I don't want you to be confined by the limitations of old fears or old expectations, whether you impose them on yourself, society impose them on you, family impose them on you, whatever it is, does not matter.
• 14:04
  And it means to me that being limitless is no longer being confined by the limitations of other people's opinions.
• 14:16
  How about past failures?
• 14:19
  They can really impose some limitations to us if we allow them, if we wrap our beliefs around the failures, past mistakes, past versions of myself, or how about past versions of yourself?
• 14:36
  You know, who you used to be doesn't have to be who you are now, and it certainly does not have to be who you are moving forward.
• 14:43
  So this is what limitless means to me.
• 14:48
  It's a much deeper meaning.
• 14:50
  So for many, many years, I think many of us go through our lives living inside these invisible walls, and we tell our things like, you know, we tell ourselves things like, I'm too old, it's too late, I've missed my chance, people won't like it if I do that.
• 15:12
  Uh, maybe they won't like me if I do that.
• 15:15
  Or what would other people think?
• 15:17
  Or, or um, you know, I should be further ahead than I am.
• 15:21
  Are any of these ringing a bell?
• 15:23
  Have you said these things to yourself at some point?
• 15:26
  Uh, I know I have said some of them, like I should know better by now.
• 15:30
  Oh, I did it again, I should know better.
• 15:32
  You know, right?
• 15:33
  We are human.
• 15:34
  Remember that, everyone who is listening, you are human.
• 15:37
  Maybe you tell yourself, I have too much responsibility.
• 15:39
  You know, I can't do that.
• 15:41
  I have too much responsibility.
• 15:44
  And over time, what happens is we start to believe that we can't change.
• 15:48
  I can't change now.
• 15:49
  I have too much responsibility.
• 15:50
  There's this, there's that, there's whatever.
• 15:53
  And we start to believe these things, and these beliefs become the cages that we live in.
• 16:02
  And it is not because they're true, but it's because we've repeated them so many times, over and over and over in our own minds, out loud sometimes, to ourselves, to others.
• 16:19
  And we start to believe them.
• 16:23
  So limitless as a word for me means life should have no limits.
• 16:32
  It means I no longer want to be limited by beliefs that aren't true.
• 16:39
  Now that's a very different way for this word to land, and it's a very different meaning.
• 16:47
  And now this becomes a compass, right?
• 16:50
  A compass for how to live in the direction to go.
• 16:54
  That's very, very different.
• 16:56
  And I want you to find your own word.
• 16:58
  If it turns out to be limitless, kudos, you can totally share my word.
• 17:03
  But I want you to find your own word, and I want to give you some examples of this.
• 17:09
  For me, limitless means believing that I can continue evolving no matter how I choose to evolve.
• 17:17
  It means believing that I can create new opportunities at will.
• 17:23
  It means believing that my purpose does not expire when my kids grow up.
• 17:30
  It does not expire at the age of 40 or 50 or 60 or 70 or beyond.
• 17:38
  My mom lived to be almost 99 years old.
• 17:41
  She still had purpose right up until the day she died.
• 17:44
  For her, even when she couldn't get out, even when she spent the last three years in a nursing home, she would still say, I can't go anywhere, I'm not ready because I have to see this little girl graduate.
• 17:54
  And she would talk about my daughter.
• 17:57
  That was her goal.
• 17:58
  That was her purpose.
• 18:01
  So being limitless for me means believing that reinvention is available.
• 18:08
  It means believing that healing is possible and believing that my next chapter can be more meaningful than the last one.
• 18:18
  Now, maybe for you again, your word won't be limitless, or maybe it will.
• 18:23
  I don't know.
• 18:24
  Maybe your word is courage, maybe it's peace or joy, maybe it's trust or freedom or abundance, maybe it's adventure or connection.
• 18:38
  I mean, there's infinite numbers of words that it could be, but the specific word matters less than finding the truth underneath it.
• 18:50
  That's what really matters.
• 18:51
  Finding the truth underneath your word.
• 18:55
  So I want to use a tree kind of as a reflection point here, or a visual, we'll say.
• 19:04
  And as I was thinking about all of this, I realized something else.
• 19:07
  You know, the strongest trees out there are pretty limitless.
• 19:10
  They can grow and grow and grow and grow, right?
• 19:12
  But they're not limitless because they have no roots and they have not gone through the muck and the mud.
• 19:19
  They're limitless because they do have roots that have gone through the muck and the mud.
• 19:26
  Okay, if you get my drift, we've all gone through some muff and mud.
• 19:31
  And the deeper those roots, the higher the branches can grow.
• 19:37
  Now that realization led me to three words that have continuously kind of been popping up that I want to bring into this episode that are meaningful.
• 19:50
  And I think, and and it goes right along with the tree visual and uh part of my branding and what I believe.
• 19:58
  And the words are rooted, resilient, and rising.
• 20:03
  So that means being rooted in who you are so that you can become who you want to be.
• 20:10
  That means resilient, being resilient through life's challenges, continuing to grow, continuing to reach high up into the sky and into the world, no matter what, and rising into what comes next.
• 20:29
  That's the journey.
• 20:31
  It's not about perfection, it's not constant productivity, it's not having all the answers, it's growth and it's steady growth, one season at a time.
• 20:42
  Some seasons a tree has to be dormant, right?
• 20:45
  It looks like it's dead in the winter when it's cold, it's not.
• 20:49
  It's resting.
• 20:50
  Those seasons are okay.
• 20:52
  And then boom, it's growing more and more and more in the spring.
• 20:55
  So to give you the visual, I hope that helps.
• 20:59
  Now, what I want to do is I want to give you something practical to help you get to your word.
• 21:06
  Now, if you've been listening to this podcast, I always suggest you have a journal at hand.
• 21:10
  You know, if you want to open a note up on your phone or just think about these questions.
• 21:14
  Either way, definitely take the time to do this.
• 21:17
  Don't overthink this, because we can overthink this and talk ourselves out of what really our gut gives us pretty quickly.
• 21:26
  But I do want you to look for that hidden deeper meaning.
• 21:30
  So I'm gonna give you some questions here.
• 21:32
  And the first one is what am I craving most right now?
• 21:42
  Now, this is not what do you need to do or what you should do.
• 21:47
  This is what are you really truly craving at your core?
• 21:53
  This could be peace or connection or freedom or adventure, could be a number of different things, confidence, maybe clarity or rest, maybe purpose in life, whatever it is, right?
• 22:04
  What are you really genuinely craving at the core of your being right now?
• 22:11
  Now, question number two is two parts.
• 22:15
  If everything worked out better than you could have ever expected, who would you become?
• 22:23
  So you're gonna word this if everything worked out better than expected, who would I become?
• 22:30
  That is your question.
• 22:31
  Part one.
• 22:33
  And part two of this is what qualities would describe that version of me?
• 22:42
  What qualities would describe that version of me?
• 22:47
  Question number three is also two parts.
• 22:52
  First one is what word feels both exciting and slightly maybe a little bit uncomfortable.
• 23:04
  And what word feels like an invitation and a challenge?
• 23:09
  Basically asking you just two different ways.
• 23:13
  That's often where your word lives.
• 23:18
  Something that's a bit of a stretch and a little uncomfortable, but something you're really drawn to and is a little bit exciting.
• 23:26
  And finally, what word feels like coming home now?
• 23:42
  I don't think we really choose our word, I think our word finds us.
• 23:48
  It's kind of like your purpose, your destiny, right?
• 23:51
  You can't force us, it it finds you.
• 23:53
  But it only finds you if you give yourself the space for it to find you.
• 23:58
  And you really start thinking and giving yourself the room, the pause, and the space to do so.
• 24:06
  And when it finds you, it can literally become a compass.
• 24:13
  And it's not because it's it's telling you exactly where to go, but it's because it reminds you of who you're becoming.
• 24:26
  So my word is limitless.
• 24:28
  Not because I want more stuff, not because I need more accomplishments, and not because I think life should be easy necessarily.
• 24:39
  My word is limitless because I no longer want to live inside the limitations that were never meant to be forever or to define me.
• 24:53
  And maybe today is the day you start to discover your word too.
• 25:00
  So I'm gonna let this land, let you really think about this and come up with this and look for the deeper overall meaning.
• 25:09
  Listen to this episode again if you want.
• 25:11
  Check the show notes for your questions.
• 25:13
  They'll all be in there and resources.
• 25:16
  And if this episode resonated with you, I would love to hear what your word is.
• 25:23
  Come join us inside my free Facebook community, Limitless Living for Women Who Want More.
• 25:29
  And when you get there, tell us your word or tell us the words you're considering.
• 25:35
  Sometimes actually saying it out loud or putting it, you know, out there in a supportive group like that is the first step toward really realizing what the word is and owning it, and then your step towards becoming it.
• 25:52
  You can also learn more about me, my coaching, speaking, upcoming experiences, and the limitless reset method by visiting my website at fredericadavis.com.
• 26:03
  And here's the thing: if you are enjoying today's episode, if it has given you value, please subscribe, leave a review, share it with a woman who might need this message too.
• 26:16
  And thank you so much for spending time with me.
• 26:18
  Until next time, stay rooted, stay resilient, keep rising.
• 26:23
  And remember, your next chapter may very well be your best one yet.
• 26:27
  So I'll see you on Thursday for your wellness reset Thursday.
• 26:31
  You'll hear a little bit more about my adventures in the Costa Rican rainforest and some of the health and wellness benefits.
• 26:39
  So take care.
• 26:40
  Until then.