Latest / The Mental Healness Podcast / Things that you could learn from a narcissist

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Things that you could learn from a narcissist · The Mental Healness Podcast

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  What is going on beautiful people today?
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  Well, we're going to be talking about things that you can learn
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  from a narcissist. Trust me, you're going to want
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  to stay and watch the video. Don't leave right now.
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  If you're new here, my name is Lee Hammock.
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  I'm a self aware narcissist and welcome to another episode of
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  The Narcissist Code. So boom, welcome back, welcome
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  back, welcome back folks. Yes, yes, yes, there are things,
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  believe it or not, believe it or not, it's like Ripley's believe
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  it or not that you can actually learn from a narcissist, right?
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  And please bear it because I'm telling you y'all, y'all know
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  how I spin it. Y'all know how I like to put a
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  spin on things and that and that type of stuff right there.
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  How I like to try to reframe experiences to help you heal.
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  Like instead of saying I wasted time, you can say I, at least I,
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  I spent this time learning how not to be treated.
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  So now in the future, I know how to be treated if I so choose to
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  be in a new relationship, if I so choose to move forward and be
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  with somebody else, if I so choose to, you know, live my
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  life in this other way. This is what happens in a lot of
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  these spaces right here, right? So narcissistic people, toxic
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  people, whatever. Like teach you things about
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  yourself that you might not have known.
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  One thing that you can learn from a narcissist is how strong
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  you are. Because one of the most like one
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  of the most impactful statements that I've ever heard in my life,
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  right was like, it's it said you never know how strong you are
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  until you have to be until you have to be strong.
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  You don't know how much strength you have inside of you until you
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  have to be strong. Like in these situations, if
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  you're trying to get out or leave a ties relationship,
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  you're trying to stay no contact, you're trying to learn
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  how to set boundaries and things like that.
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  You don't know, you didn't know you had that in you.
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  A lot of times, like a lot of times, narcissistic can bring
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  out the worst in you, right? They can bring out the worst in
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  you. You can have some reactive abuse
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  incidents where you you look like the abuser, where you look
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  toxic, where you look like the the person that is doing all the
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  harm, right. But you can also learn things
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  about yourself that how strong you absolutely are.
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  You know, you know how strong you have to be to survive a
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  toxic narcissistic relationship. You know how strongly have to be
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  to survive emotional, physical, narcissistic abuse.
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  You know how strong. Yeah, you have to be strong as
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  hell. So that's one thing that you can
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  learn from narcissist, is how strong you already are, how
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  absolutely strong, how much strength you already have inside
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  of you, how powerful you already are.
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  That's impactful. That's so y'all, I'm just
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  telling you this is it can be so impactful.
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  It can be so helpful for you in these spaces to understand what
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  you're going through, to understand what you're
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  experiencing, right? But like to understand how
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  strong you are. You know how strong you have to
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  be. You know, some people, and it's
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  not me being judgmental y'all, but some people say, look, I
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  stayed for the kids, which is understandable in a lot of
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  circumstances, right? That's the initial mindset.
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  You don't want to break the family up, you don't want to do
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  this, you don't want to do that, right?
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  That's the initial mindset that so many people face and so many
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  people go through, right? But then you also understand the
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  other side of things. I had to change scenery, y'all?
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  Like I said, some people stay for the kids, right?
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  But then there's a lot of people who don't know how strong you
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  have to be to leave to take the kids and leave to take the kids
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  to just understand. Just like, damn, I have to be
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  strong to be able to leave this toxic relationship space for my
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  kids. You know, you don't have strong.
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  You have to be until you have to do it.
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  And a lot of people experience this same exact phenomenon.
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  They go through it, they experience it.
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  It hurts and it sucks, but look how strong you are.
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  Take time to sit back and sometimes just like, damn, I am
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  strong, strong as hell. You know me like that helps you,
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  that can help you in the end, because like I said earlier,
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  some people do stay for the kids.
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  It takes strength to stay for the kids sometimes too, because
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  you feel like you're sacrificing yourself, you're sacrificing
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  your happiness sometimes in these spaces.
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  So this takes strength. It's a different type of
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  strength, you know, like it's just everybody's situation will
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  be different, y'all, but that's one thing that you can
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  absolutely learn from a narcissist or toxic person.
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  It's just how strong you actually are.
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  You know how ingenious you have to be, how smart you are.
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  This is the crazy thing about it is y'all, so many people get
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  into these toxic relationships, right?
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  And being in these high school relationships, narcissistic
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  people try to make you insecure. They try to make they try to
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  take away your confidence, they try to take away yourself
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  confidence because no, narcissists seem like they have
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  a lot of self-confidence, but we lack it.
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  The the you know, us exuding this layer of self-confidence
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  typically is to mask the you know, the gross insecurities,
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  the huge insecurities that we do have.
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  So if you see narcissistic people out here being, you know,
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  super out there and confident, typically they're super
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  insecure. Like it doesn't take much.
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  They have these big egos and it doesn't take much to fracture
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  their egos. So one thing you have to learn,
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  you can learn from a narcissist is how good a person you are,
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  how you know how much confidence you have because they try to
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  take it from you. Yo, narcissists are jealous of
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  you. They mirror you.
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  Like think about they right there.
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  They mirror you, They are jealous of you.
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  So they mirror you. They try to make it seem like
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  you're a bad person, that you don't have anything to offer the
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  world, that you're just horrible overall.
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  So they mirror you, they mirror you any circumstances, they
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  mirror you any situations. They start to act like you,
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  you're you're not a good person, you're a horrible person.
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  You're not attractive. Nobody else is going to want
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  you. But you're good enough for me to
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  behave like you're good enough for me to mirror.
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  You're good. You're good enough for me to try
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  to take on your personality characteristics, try to
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  integrate myself into your friend group, try to get people,
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  try to take your friends from you.
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  You see what I'm saying? That you, you're bad.
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  You you're this, you're that. They try to name call you.
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  They're trying to belittle you. They're trying to demean you,
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  but they want to act like you. They want to become like you
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  sometimes. What sense does that make?
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  Think about it. From right there, you can learn
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  how valuable you actually are, how good a person you actually
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  are. Like they tried to project their
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  insecurities onto you because they are super insecure people,
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  so they want to make you feel less than.
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  Understand how valuable you are for me to be start behaving like
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  you. For me to take on your
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  personality characteristics, for me to start to act like you
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  understand how valuable you actually are in these
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  circumstances, in this situation.
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  So think about it from that perspective right there.
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  You are valuable. You are worth so much.
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  You are powerful. You have a lot going for you
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  have so much going for you. Like you have so much going for
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  you that I have to act like you. You have so much going for you
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  that I have to try to take it from you.
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  You have so much going for you that I have to try to be like
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  you. But I have to make you feel like
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  you don't have those things. So when I started to do it, so
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  when I started to do the exact same things you do, when I
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  started to take I, I chastised your taste in music.
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  But now I'm listening to it. I chastise the way you dress,
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  but I'm dressing like you. This could be your friend or
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  family member. You have to be a partner, right?
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  This can be, like I said, it's the fact that the things that
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  they are jealous, jealous of are the things that you are.
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  They they show you how powerful you actually are, right?
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  That's what I'm telling you. Narcissistic people talk to
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  people in these spaces right here.
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  You understand exactly how much you're worth because they show
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  you, but they try to take they try to take it from you.
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  You're worthless. Nobody else is going.
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  You're worthless. Nobody else is going to want
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  you, but I don't want to leave you.
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  I'm not going to let you move on.
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  What kind of dumb ass sake? What kind of dumb ass mindset is
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  that? Y'all?
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  Nobody else is going to want you, but I'm not going to let
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  you move on. What I'm going to move on, but
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  I'm going to try to interrupt and interfere with your life,
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  interrupt and interfere, interfere with your new
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  relationships. Nobody else is going to want
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  you. You're not you're not going to
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  find anybody better than me. That's that's that's one thing
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  you can actually learn from a narcissist right there too, is
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  how little they are worth is how little they are inside and how
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  little we are inside. You know, I'm a narcissist, you
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  know, you just understand that right there.
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  They are so insecure that they want to try to convince you that
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  they are the best you're going to get, but they try to keep you
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  from moving on. What sense does that make?
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  Y'all? What sense does that make?
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  One thing, you can find a lot of truth about you in the lies of
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  narcissist tales. You can find out a lot.
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  Yo, I just made it up to that's fire.
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  Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait. You can hear a lot of truth in
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  the lies of narcissist tales because you can just flip it.
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  See what they're saying. You're worthless.
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  That means you work much you work a lot.
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  You're a you're a horrible looking.
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  You're avoid. That means you look good.
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  Look at that right there. They're telling you what you're
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  they're telling you how much you're worth by lying to you
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  about it. It's like opposite day.
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  You have to do the it's like the opposite day.
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  Opposite is the track opposite this, opposite that.
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  You know what I mean? This is the type of space that
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  you're in. You can understand exactly how
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  much you're worth when they lie to you.
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  The lies that they tell are the truth, like the flip it.
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  It's the truth, the lie that they tell you.
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  Nobody else is going to want you.
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  They know people going to want you.
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  So that's why they try to keep you from moving on.
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  How ignorant is that sound? Nobody else is going to want
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  you. But I'm gonna try to disrupt
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  your life. I'm gonna try to disrupt your
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  schedule. You're the worst thing that ever
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  happened to me. But I'm not going to.
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  I'm not going to let you move on.
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  I'm going to be. I'm going to try to throw my
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  life in your face. You can learn a lot about
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  yourself from the way narcissists talk and how they
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  act and how they behave. I know it sounds ignorant as
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  hell, but just flip it. Reframing your experience can
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  help you out so much. Y'all reframing it.
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  Look, look how much like look how like there's so many people
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  that I've talked to they're in my support group that like they,
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  they are relearning themselves like they're relearning things
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  about themselves, but they're also really things realizing
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  things about themselves from this toxic relationship.
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  Like you know what? I didn't know how strong I could
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  be Lee, I'm the strongest. I'm strong as hell.
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  I ain't know this. I'm smart as hell.
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  I didn't know how smart I could be.
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  I didn't know how you know how ingenious I could be.
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  I didn't know I could make these plans.
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  I didn't know I could just stay no contact.
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  I didn't know how resilient I was, how resilient I am.
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  You don't know what you don't know.
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  But that's why I said I made this video to just help you
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  understand how reframing your experience can help you out so
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  much. It can help you understand so
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  much that is going on within this toxic relationship dynamic.
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  It's just, y'all, reframing is powerful.
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  It is reframe. Just take a look at your
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  situation right now, because even if you're still in it,
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  right, and you want to be out of it or you trying to stay in it,
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  whatever you, whatever your decision is, right, reframe
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  your, reframe your mindset. This is not like don't reframe
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  it in a way that keeps you sad as hell.
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  You know what I mean? My life is over.
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  Nobody else is going to want me so well, at least how strong I
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  got to be to stay in the toxicity.
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  Yeah, that's reframing it to be for some, for some sadness.
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  You see what I'm saying? Creating a plan of action and
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  things like that can help you understand what comes next.
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  Your plan of action is going to look different from everybody
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  else's plan of action. Your strengths are going to be
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  different than other people's strengths.
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  Your weaknesses are going to be different than other people
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  weaknesses. This kind of goes without
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  saying. You know what I mean?
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  So I want y'all to be as strong as you possibly can.
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  I want y'all to have the life that you actually want to live.
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  I want you to be as powerful and as happy as you possibly can.
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  Y'all, because that's the goal. Reframing your experience can
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  help you just thrive in the face of this, this, this damn dark
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  cloud that might be over your life right now.
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  You know what I mean? So that's why I made this video,
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  y'all Things that you can learn about yourself from toxic
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  narcissistic relationships, Things you can learn from a
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  narcissist like I'm not telling you about anything you can
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  learn. You can learn how to be sneaky,
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  you can learn how to be manipulative.
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  You can learn all that type of stuff too.
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  That's kind of darkness. So right, you mean, you know
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  what? You didn't know how smart you
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  are. You didn't know how intuitive.
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  You can learn how intuitive you are because like sometimes your
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  sixth sense kicks in. You're like, man, this.
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  They're cheating on me, Andy. I feel like you cheat on me.
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  There should be. Your behavior has shifted.
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  You can realize how you can learn how intuitive you are.
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  You can understand, you can learn how good your senses are,
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  but you got to learn how to follow your senses.
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  You see what I'm saying? You can learn how to trust your
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  intuition, trust those senses. Trust that you are making the
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  right decision. Trust that you know what's going
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  on. Trust that you know the things
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  are going to work out for the best for you.
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  Trust that girl. Learn how loving you can learn
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  how loving and caring you are. You can learn how empathetic you
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  are. Because when you compare and
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  contrast yourself to this toxic ass narcissistic bastard, you
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  understand. It's like, I am loving to care.
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  Look how dark you are. Look, I am compassionate.
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  I am empathetic. They'll tell you that you look,
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  they'll tell you, they'll tell you that you're heartless, that
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  you don't have a heart. What the hell are you doing with
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  them then? I got to have something to be
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  with your crazy ass, you know what I mean?
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  That's a hard to hear somewhere Tin man, you know what I mean?
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  If I only had a brain. You got something, you know it.
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  Many more y'all. Thank you for tuning in to this
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  video. I appreciate y'all so much.
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  I'm so thankful for you. If you made it this far and you
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  live in the Washington DC area or surrounding areas or not.
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  Our very first in person workshop is going to be on
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  September the 14th, 2024 from 12:00 PM to 4:00 PM.
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  You'll find a link in the description of this video says
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  DC Workshop and I'm going to pin it to the top of the comment
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  section as well to check that out.
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  Come out there and see me Washington DC.
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  It's going to be an amazing in person event to help you you
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  heal, grow, get around people that are going through the same
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  thing as you, get around people to understand what you're going
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  through. And also maybe maybe a little
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  bit, maybe it might be on the bottom of your list, but maybe
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  neatly Hemet. Anyway, y'all makes yourself to
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  this channel. Mr. Hillis is out, please.
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  Thank you so much for making it to the end of my video.
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  I am extremely grateful for you. Have no idea.
• 13:17
  If you haven't already, make sure you go ahead and subscribe
• 13:19
  to the channel. Helps reach more people and
• 13:21
  click on the screen to watch another video or to browse to
• 13:23
  another playlist. There's also a link on the
• 13:25
  screen to check out my courses and my support groups to help
• 13:28
  you heal and understand what you've been through.
• 13:30
  Thank you so much again. I will see you in the next
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  video. Peace.