Latest / Untraditionally Lala / Jenna Willis on Dating, DINKS, and Just Doing It!

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Jenna Willis on Dating, DINKS, and Just Doing It! · Untraditionally Lala

• 0:06
  Speaker 1: Hello, gorgeous. I'm good. How are you well?
• 0:12
  Speaker 2: You just said hello gorgeous.
• 0:13
  Speaker 1: I thought thought directed at you. You.
• 0:18
  Speaker 3: Jenna willis my listeners? Who are my friends?
• 0:23
  Speaker 1: Yes?
• 0:24
  Speaker 3: I feel like every time I see you in the
• 0:26
  Speaker 3: morning at this hour, you're telling me to do something
• 0:29
  Speaker 3: that I truly don't want to do. But I leave
• 0:34
  Speaker 3: feeling like my ass is perkier than normal.
• 0:37
  Speaker 4: It is fact.
• 0:40
  Speaker 1: By the way, what is that.
• 0:41
  Speaker 3: Like when you know how you get to the gym
• 0:44
  Speaker 3: and you're like, okay, today's leg and butt day. Is
• 0:47
  Speaker 3: it just like the muscles that are getting swollen so
• 0:49
  Speaker 3: it looks perkier than blow.
• 0:51
  Speaker 2: Oh, you're opening like the muscles up? Is that what
• 0:54
  Speaker 2: it is?
• 0:54
  Speaker 4: We're not opening them up, You're bringing blood flow to them, right,
• 0:57
  Speaker 4: and blood flow.
• 0:58
  Speaker 3: Experience that makes There's so many times where I'll see
• 1:03
  Speaker 3: people doing something before, like a workout shoot, and I'm like, girl,
• 1:08
  Speaker 3: you should have been doing that the whole time, Like
• 1:09
  Speaker 3: why are you just doing it now? Like she looks good, right,
• 1:11
  Speaker 3: but you do think like you're not gonna get a
• 1:14
  Speaker 3: six pack.
• 1:15
  Speaker 2: Right now in twenty minutes.
• 1:17
  Speaker 3: Yeah, but now it's making sense.
• 1:18
  Speaker 2: But when she starts doing her crunches, it appears.
• 1:21
  Speaker 4: Those like fab five minute workouts don't work well.
• 1:24
  Speaker 3: Actually, there's a lot of questions that will address in
• 1:26
  Speaker 3: the bonus.
• 1:28
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's so crazy because.
• 1:29
  Speaker 3: No matter how many times I have you on. Yeah,
• 1:31
  Speaker 3: every time I post that I'm having you on and
• 1:33
  Speaker 3: doing a Q and A, my little inbox thing is flooded.
• 1:40
  Speaker 1: Yes with yes.
• 1:41
  Speaker 4: That makes me so happy because then it just means
• 1:43
  Speaker 4: people care about their health and wellness and we want
• 1:45
  Speaker 4: to make change.
• 1:46
  Speaker 1: They do.
• 1:48
  Speaker 3: But at the same time, most people are like me
• 1:50
  Speaker 3: and they're like, I want this, but I want to
• 1:52
  Speaker 3: change nothing right, So so how do we do that?
• 1:56
  Speaker 1: No, but there is a way to slow roll yourself.
• 1:59
  Speaker 3: And I'm excited to talk to you about this, which
• 2:02
  Speaker 3: we're really going to deep dive into obviously on this episode,
• 2:05
  Speaker 3: but the bonus will be really focused on that. So,
• 2:08
  Speaker 3: Jenna willis you have been my friend, as people know
• 2:11
  Speaker 3: for over ten years now.
• 2:13
  Speaker 4: I can't.
• 2:14
  Speaker 1: Is that wild? I can't.
• 2:16
  Speaker 4: We don't have to talk about that one of the
• 2:18
  Speaker 4: first I mean, when we were twelve. It's crazy.
• 2:22
  Speaker 1: Well, we're both grown.
• 2:23
  Speaker 5: Af I remember you flew to Utah, yeah, and I
• 2:28
  Speaker 5: was still living there and picked you up.
• 2:30
  Speaker 2: We went out and got like. We went to like
• 2:33
  Speaker 2: a hotel bar.
• 2:33
  Speaker 4: We went to the mall, the mall, Jena.
• 2:36
  Speaker 2: That was the first time I was I'm not lying either.
• 2:38
  Speaker 2: That was nervous. I was like, I'm just about to
• 2:40
  Speaker 2: hang out with Lauren's friend. And then we started hanging
• 2:43
  Speaker 2: out and I was like, no, it's my friend. It
• 2:47
  Speaker 2: was so fun.
• 2:48
  Speaker 3: Me and my friends, Jenna, Mom and myself drove to
• 2:53
  Speaker 3: Park City for lunch shop and Mom and I ended
• 2:57
  Speaker 3: up getting lit was that eleven dropsy.
• 3:02
  Speaker 1: Baby. It was a wild Jenna had to drive us home.
• 3:06
  Speaker 4: I like, ladies, it's okay back there, quiet down, please,
• 3:09
  Speaker 4: And then they're crying and then they're laughing. My dad
• 3:11
  Speaker 4: had just died.
• 3:13
  Speaker 1: Oh that was so dark.
• 3:15
  Speaker 3: It was We went to like McK finnigan's or whatever.
• 3:22
  Speaker 4: Best time.
• 3:22
  Speaker 1: No, it was great.
• 3:23
  Speaker 4: That's the best time. And I love Utah.
• 3:25
  Speaker 3: You.
• 3:26
  Speaker 4: I had such a great time with you guys.
• 3:27
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 3:28
  Speaker 3: No, Utah is a beautiful place. So my routine with
• 3:33
  Speaker 3: Jenna because we're homies. Yeah, but what I love about
• 3:36
  Speaker 3: our friendship. And I said this because you make an
• 3:39
  Speaker 3: appearance on the Valley this season, and I don't really
• 3:42
  Speaker 3: know which way right now that goes. But I've been
• 3:48
  Speaker 3: asked about it, and I'm not going to say too much,
• 3:50
  Speaker 3: but I have said because I participated in the after
• 3:54
  Speaker 3: show and your name appears, and I said, you know,
• 3:59
  Speaker 3: my friendship with Jenna is one of the most healthy
• 4:03
  Speaker 3: and productive friendships that I have. It's a friendship where
• 4:08
  Speaker 3: you know, we are healthy together. H a friendship where
• 4:12
  Speaker 3: we can really talk about everything and shoot it straight.
• 4:16
  Speaker 3: It's it's a game of uh, as my mom would say, tennis,
• 4:20
  Speaker 3: where the conversation goes back and.
• 4:22
  Speaker 4: Forth because we know some that don't we know somewhere.
• 4:25
  Speaker 3: It's like, okay, so this dinner is going to be
• 4:28
  Speaker 3: someone talking at me the whole time.
• 4:30
  Speaker 1: You leave feeling a little exhausted.
• 4:32
  Speaker 3: You know everything about them, they know nothing about you.
• 4:35
  Speaker 5: You know their cat's name, you know their dead great
• 4:40
  Speaker 5: grandfather and what he did.
• 4:43
  Speaker 2: You're like, okay, what about me? And my mother and I.
• 4:46
  Speaker 3: Had a good day, so like I have pre cancer
• 4:50
  Speaker 3: in my It's like, well, now that we're paying the boat, yeah,
• 4:54
  Speaker 3: everything's fine. You next time.
• 5:00
  Speaker 1: Really, you don't give a shit, but.
• 5:01
  Speaker 3: I'm so happy to know what your great great grandfather.
• 5:05
  Speaker 5: And why you are here because of him.
• 5:09
  Speaker 3: Anyway, I'm still laughing or crying both the combination.
• 5:13
  Speaker 2: Of the two. It hurts because it's true, and you
• 5:16
  Speaker 2: want to cry because it won't.
• 5:18
  Speaker 1: Change exactly exactly.
• 5:21
  Speaker 3: That is all about acceptance, accurate way it accepting.
• 5:24
  Speaker 4: It is acceptance.
• 5:25
  Speaker 3: Going through life, is going through the five stages of good.
• 5:31
  Speaker 2: Don't you think, what is it? Acceptance? No, it's like grief, acceptance, anger.
• 5:37
  Speaker 3: Anger, and then finally acceptance.
• 5:41
  Speaker 4: And here we are, and here excepting where we're at.
• 5:45
  Speaker 3: Jenna has worked me out and been my homie for
• 5:47
  Speaker 3: a very long time. You've worked me out through both
• 5:49
  Speaker 3: of my pregnancies. You've worked me out after the pregnancies.
• 5:53
  Speaker 3: And how are routine and day starts?
• 5:56
  Speaker 5: You?
• 5:56
  Speaker 1: Guys? I love it? I love it too, So I
• 6:00
  Speaker 1: told her I'm back at it.
• 6:02
  Speaker 3: I'm how what was I two three months postpartum something
• 6:06
  Speaker 3: like that?
• 6:06
  Speaker 4: Yeah, you were cleared?
• 6:08
  Speaker 1: I was cleared whatever? Six weeks after? What is that?
• 6:11
  Speaker 4: The month and a half The most of them you
• 6:13
  Speaker 4: can really start is about six weeks, right, That's like
• 6:15
  Speaker 4: the earliest you could start, and you want to start
• 6:17
  Speaker 4: very very very minimal, right, And we were after that?
• 6:22
  Speaker 4: I think I think we were eight to ten. Yeah,
• 6:25
  Speaker 4: because you know, I'm very careful about everything, which I
• 6:29
  Speaker 4: respect and I love.
• 6:30
  Speaker 1: Well.
• 6:30
  Speaker 3: You don't put pressure on people, which is also what
• 6:33
  Speaker 3: I like.
• 6:33
  Speaker 4: Ah, that's not my style, you know. I think everyone
• 6:36
  Speaker 4: needs to come to acceptance with when they're ready. Yeah,
• 6:39
  Speaker 4: and only you can make that decision, right because and
• 6:42
  Speaker 4: I'm there to facilitate it and help you make change
• 6:44
  Speaker 4: and push you as far as you can go. But
• 6:46
  Speaker 4: it's not my job right to force you to exercise, like,
• 6:51
  Speaker 4: that's a decision that you need to make when you're
• 6:52
  Speaker 4: ready to prioritize your health and wellness. Going back to acceptance.
• 6:57
  Speaker 3: Yeah, no, exactly. You know our morning routine, I Jenna comes.
• 7:02
  Speaker 3: If we want to plan our workout, Let's say we
• 7:04
  Speaker 3: want to start at nine, She'll come around eight, eight
• 7:08
  Speaker 3: thirty because we like to get our coffee, a.
• 7:12
  Speaker 2: Little chit chat, a little chit chat. Still the tea.
• 7:14
  Speaker 4: I was just gonna say, you gotta go over the
• 7:16
  Speaker 4: daily tea.
• 7:17
  Speaker 1: It's so happy.
• 7:19
  Speaker 3: It is a lot happens in our lives in forty
• 7:22
  Speaker 3: eight hours.
• 7:23
  Speaker 1: It does.
• 7:24
  Speaker 3: And you're one of the safe spaces for me where
• 7:28
  Speaker 3: I can talk freely about anything and everything, and I
• 7:30
  Speaker 3: know that it's going into a vault. I know that saying,
• 7:34
  Speaker 3: and like, I love talking to my mom, but sometimes
• 7:36
  Speaker 3: I'm like, all right, like I've had enough of.
• 7:38
  Speaker 4: It's a little different. It's a little different opinion. It
• 7:41
  Speaker 4: is no and that's okay.
• 7:42
  Speaker 5: You get different answers talent then you kind of want
• 7:46
  Speaker 5: from a friend. Yeah, you get the motherly answer or
• 7:49
  Speaker 5: the parent answer, and you're like, I get that.
• 7:51
  Speaker 2: I know that an answer. I don't want it. That's
• 7:52
  Speaker 2: why I'm not talking to you.
• 7:54
  Speaker 3: Well, mom's answers immediately fuck them. They don't deserve to
• 7:57
  Speaker 3: be your friend.
• 7:58
  Speaker 1: That's not mine.
• 8:00
  Speaker 3: Little bit of a productive like you know, you're my mom,
• 8:03
  Speaker 3: you're my mom.
• 8:05
  Speaker 4: That is normally where I'm like, okay, why don't we
• 8:07
  Speaker 4: take a beat, think this through, m resonate, ruminate a
• 8:11
  Speaker 4: little bit.
• 8:12
  Speaker 3: What did you do to participate in that behavior?
• 8:15
  Speaker 4: I will always challenge you on that.
• 8:17
  Speaker 3: But that's why I think I said in the after show,
• 8:20
  Speaker 3: which you guys will see what I said, and I
• 8:23
  Speaker 3: stand by you being one of the healthiest friendships.
• 8:26
  Speaker 1: I have and have ever had.
• 8:28
  Speaker 3: It means a lot and I thoroughly enjoy the process
• 8:32
  Speaker 3: that goes into not only the cherry on top which
• 8:36
  Speaker 3: I think is the body for me. Like a lot
• 8:38
  Speaker 3: of people, they start working out because they want a
• 8:40
  Speaker 3: perky butt, they want a tone's stomach, whatever, whatever the
• 8:43
  Speaker 3: case may be.
• 8:44
  Speaker 1: I know that that will come. But the way that.
• 8:47
  Speaker 3: I leave a workout it sets the tone for the
• 8:51
  Speaker 3: entire day mentally. Yeah, so thank you for that.
• 9:00
  Speaker 1: I want to talk about are working out and all
• 9:02
  Speaker 1: those things.
• 9:03
  Speaker 3: But you also which we didn't get to cover the
• 9:06
  Speaker 3: last time. You are thirty eight, thirty eight, you look great.
• 9:12
  Speaker 4: Thank you.
• 9:13
  Speaker 2: You were my.
• 9:13
  Speaker 3: Age and you thank you.
• 9:16
  Speaker 4: Of course she does, she works out, she's care of herself.
• 9:20
  Speaker 2: I thought I do.
• 9:21
  Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, I thought you're in your late twenties.
• 9:25
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I know, I'm trying to be.
• 9:27
  Speaker 4: I feel like I just like start shouting it out, like, yeah,
• 9:29
  Speaker 4: I'm I'm thirty eight.
• 9:30
  Speaker 2: I thought you two were the same age.
• 9:32
  Speaker 3: I think I'll be thirty five this year.
• 9:35
  Speaker 1: But I think that.
• 9:38
  Speaker 3: The j Lo's and the Kim Kardashians and the Gwen
• 9:41
  Speaker 3: Stefani's have really shifted the game.
• 9:44
  Speaker 1: And people can say, well, they.
• 9:45
  Speaker 3: Have access to like the best doctors, and they have
• 9:47
  Speaker 3: access to injectables and all the things.
• 9:50
  Speaker 1: Great, don't care regardless.
• 9:52
  Speaker 3: They look amazing and no matter what their faces look
• 9:58
  Speaker 3: like due to whatever work they've had. I'm sorry the
• 10:01
  Speaker 3: way they get up on stage and poplock and drop
• 10:04
  Speaker 3: it to the fucking ground. Yeah they are putting in
• 10:09
  Speaker 3: Oh my god, because I feel like she hasn't had
• 10:11
  Speaker 3: a whole bunch of work.
• 10:12
  Speaker 2: If we're going to talk.
• 10:13
  Speaker 5: About not having work, I feel like she's naturally beautiful and.
• 10:16
  Speaker 4: I haven't done work.
• 10:21
  Speaker 3: Yeah. Like, it's just a different day and age, and
• 10:23
  Speaker 3: I think people have access to googling and saying like, oh,
• 10:28
  Speaker 3: this does not do to my body what I thought
• 10:32
  Speaker 3: it would do, and there's just information at the tip
• 10:35
  Speaker 3: of our fingers. But you went through a fertility journey
• 10:38
  Speaker 3: what a year and a half ago?
• 10:40
  Speaker 4: Yep?
• 10:41
  Speaker 1: What was what was that like?
• 10:43
  Speaker 3: Because you and I talk about this all the time,
• 10:44
  Speaker 3: us getting older, wanting to create a family.
• 10:47
  Speaker 1: The dating world is.
• 10:49
  Speaker 3: Grim like it hotter in here? I know?
• 10:53
  Speaker 1: Actually did fill my pips get a little?
• 10:57
  Speaker 2: Are we going here?
• 11:00
  Speaker 1: What was the point for you?
• 11:03
  Speaker 4: I mean there were a few levels of it, you know.
• 11:08
  Speaker 4: The point was to be able to take pressure off
• 11:11
  Speaker 4: of the dating life, okay, and and give me those
• 11:14
  Speaker 4: few extra years to give me the opportunity. How you did.
• 11:21
  Speaker 4: If I get to a point in my life where
• 11:23
  Speaker 4: you know, I want to bring a child into the
• 11:25
  Speaker 4: world on my own, I can.
• 11:28
  Speaker 3: So you would be open to that. Yeah, you know,
• 11:31
  Speaker 3: I have people.
• 11:32
  Speaker 4: You're like, good, we have a year end and so
• 11:36
  Speaker 4: we're doing that.
• 11:37
  Speaker 3: I have a third I would like a friend to
• 11:39
  Speaker 3: participate with me.
• 11:40
  Speaker 1: So I'm just kidding.
• 11:43
  Speaker 2: You're on her schedule. Now, You're ready to a.
• 11:45
  Speaker 3: Lot of people that I've had on the podcast who
• 11:47
  Speaker 3: go through a fertility journey and they freeze their eggs
• 11:51
  Speaker 3: and they're ensuring that when they find a partner, when
• 11:56
  Speaker 3: that time comes, they have eggs that are one hundred
• 12:00
  Speaker 3: should they not be creating anymore?
• 12:03
  Speaker 1: Right?
• 12:04
  Speaker 3: But the biggest, the biggest factor in that is if
• 12:08
  Speaker 3: I don't find a partner, then I don't need to
• 12:10
  Speaker 3: be a mom. So you're saying that you would go
• 12:14
  Speaker 3: the route of choosing to be a single mom.
• 12:16
  Speaker 4: I lean way more towards being a single mom than
• 12:21
  Speaker 4: not being a mom at all now, of course, and
• 12:24
  Speaker 4: you say this the most out of anyone, which, by
• 12:26
  Speaker 4: the way, is one of the things I love the
• 12:28
  Speaker 4: most about you. Whenever anything happens, he said, I'm being guided.
• 12:33
  Speaker 4: You have to trust in God in the universe. Yeah, right,
• 12:36
  Speaker 4: And everything happens for a reason, and you know I
• 12:40
  Speaker 4: get I mean you know this by now. I can
• 12:42
  Speaker 4: get very emotionally worked up, so can you. That's probably
• 12:44
  Speaker 4: why we're so close, because I'm like, I'm going to
• 12:46
  Speaker 4: fuck somebody up and then we're like, oh, I'm good,
• 12:48
  Speaker 4: I let it out right yea. But what you always
• 12:50
  Speaker 4: come back to is everything happens for a reason. And
• 12:53
  Speaker 4: I think it's hard to predict what the future holds,
• 12:56
  Speaker 4: you know, but in this moment right now, I absolute
• 13:00
  Speaker 4: would go that path over never having a child.
• 13:03
  Speaker 1: I love that.
• 13:05
  Speaker 4: The factors that play into it, of course.
• 13:07
  Speaker 5: So you see the relationships and how coparenting looks, it's like,
• 13:11
  Speaker 5: why even risk that, you know?
• 13:13
  Speaker 4: Well, I think, yeah, you know, I think it goes definitely,
• 13:17
  Speaker 4: But there's always factors that make it scary, whether it
• 13:20
  Speaker 4: is doing it alone, whether it is having a partner
• 13:24
  Speaker 4: that can become anyone, right and anything at any point.
• 13:29
  Speaker 3: What what are the factors doing it alone? What are
• 13:33
  Speaker 3: the things that way heaviest on your mind with that time?
• 13:37
  Speaker 4: Energy, sleep, work, financial, I mean there's a lot, yeah,
• 13:42
  Speaker 4: there's a lot of factors that play into And we
• 13:44
  Speaker 4: live in Los Angeles, which is what now is it?
• 13:47
  Speaker 4: Is it the most expensive city in the United States
• 13:49
  Speaker 4: or is it your.
• 13:49
  Speaker 3: I think it's in the top five. I know New
• 13:52
  Speaker 3: York and San Francisco.
• 13:53
  Speaker 4: I mean it's and think about it, right, Having help
• 13:58
  Speaker 4: is real. Doing it all is not easy, that's for sure.
• 14:03
  Speaker 3: Well, I was talking to a friend today who has
• 14:06
  Speaker 3: a conventional thing happening, very traditional.
• 14:10
  Speaker 1: Uh.
• 14:11
  Speaker 3: And you know, any sort of talk about finances takes me.
• 14:18
  Speaker 1: To a place of PTSD, right, because.
• 14:21
  Speaker 3: It reminds me of when the two thousand and eight
• 14:23
  Speaker 3: recession happened and my dad lost everything, And it was
• 14:26
  Speaker 3: the first time that I saw my parents' fight where
• 14:29
  Speaker 3: there was no remedy for the situation unless a pile
• 14:32
  Speaker 3: of money dropped into the household. It was a conversation
• 14:37
  Speaker 3: that still to this day when someone says we had
• 14:39
  Speaker 3: an argument about finances, I'm like, oh, my gosh, I
• 14:43
  Speaker 3: have a knot in my throat.
• 14:45
  Speaker 1: Yeah, And they were talking about how you know, he works, she's.
• 14:48
  Speaker 3: A stay at home mom. Some debt had been collected
• 14:52
  Speaker 3: on a credit card, because that's what happens. It's expensive
• 14:56
  Speaker 3: to live, right, And like she said, you know, if
• 15:02
  Speaker 3: I go and get a job, I'm probably going to
• 15:06
  Speaker 3: be making as much as I would have to pay
• 15:09
  Speaker 3: someone to come in to.
• 15:10
  Speaker 1: Watch the kid.
• 15:12
  Speaker 2: You know.
• 15:12
  Speaker 3: So there's such true it's wild. However, when I think.
• 15:20
  Speaker 1: About that, I go to a place of.
• 15:25
  Speaker 3: When there's a dynamic between a husband and a wife,
• 15:29
  Speaker 3: or just a partnership man and man, woman and woman,
• 15:33
  Speaker 3: when there's intimacy that has now entered the chat, it
• 15:38
  Speaker 3: just adds another layer of stress. There are stressors in
• 15:43
  Speaker 3: my household. But because there's not the intimate factor, because
• 15:48
  Speaker 3: it's me and my mom or me and.
• 15:49
  Speaker 4: Easting, I think it's easier to set boundaries.
• 15:51
  Speaker 3: Yes, it's easier to set boundaries because the moment that
• 15:56
  Speaker 3: you're not getting along with your partner, what do you
• 15:58
  Speaker 3: stop doing? You stop being intimate with them. Yeah, there's
• 16:01
  Speaker 3: another layer of stress that goes into that. So when
• 16:05
  Speaker 3: I hear that someone wants to be a parent on
• 16:07
  Speaker 3: their own, you are going to have the same amount
• 16:11
  Speaker 3: of stress that a couple has.
• 16:14
  Speaker 1: But actually you get to eliminate one of the stressors,
• 16:18
  Speaker 1: which is dealing with a partner.
• 16:21
  Speaker 5: That's true, but that with that stress comes many of
• 16:25
  Speaker 5: stresses you know, but with the partner. Eliminating the partner,
• 16:29
  Speaker 5: you're eliminating financials, You're eliminating so many things underneath just that,
• 16:34
  Speaker 5: you know, because the partner brings so many other things.
• 16:37
  Speaker 5: I agree, So like, eliminating the partner eliminates so.
• 16:41
  Speaker 2: Much more than just that.
• 16:42
  Speaker 4: Have you guys heard of dinks? This term called dinks?
• 16:44
  Speaker 3: No?
• 16:44
  Speaker 1: What is that?
• 16:45
  Speaker 4: Dual income no kids. It's like a new thing.
• 16:47
  Speaker 2: Oh yeah all the time.
• 16:53
  Speaker 4: But you know, yeah income no kids and they just
• 16:57
  Speaker 4: buy the most ridiculous things or they're like all the
• 17:00
  Speaker 4: time and they're like, and how do we afford this?
• 17:05
  Speaker 2: I never knew what it.
• 17:06
  Speaker 4: Meant though, now you know. If you don't know, now
• 17:10
  Speaker 4: you know.
• 17:10
  Speaker 3: However, I love this, Yeah, I love this, like going
• 17:14
  Speaker 3: out and traveling the world for me personally without my kids,
• 17:20
  Speaker 3: I don't.
• 17:21
  Speaker 1: Know what my purpose would be.
• 17:23
  Speaker 4: We've spoken about this because I just got another puppy,
• 17:25
  Speaker 4: and you're like Johna, You're like me. We want purpose
• 17:28
  Speaker 4: and give us the ability to help and take care
• 17:30
  Speaker 4: of something and nurtures. Yes, I mean, let's be on,
• 17:32
  Speaker 4: look what I do for a living, all right, help people?
• 17:36
  Speaker 3: Yes, But I I am with you in that, Yeah,
• 17:41
  Speaker 3: when people say they don't want kids, I'm like, they
• 17:45
  Speaker 3: don't have them because it changes everything. But a little
• 17:47
  Speaker 3: part of my heart breaks just because I know the
• 17:50
  Speaker 3: feeling of when you have your own child. I'll be honest, like,
• 17:53
  Speaker 3: I love kids, but like if someone asked me to
• 17:55
  Speaker 3: babysit their kid, I would have zero fucking interest in.
• 17:59
  Speaker 2: It's like looking at a pig. Sure of like a
• 18:01
  Speaker 2: photo of you.
• 18:03
  Speaker 4: If we're going to get like really open and vulnerable,
• 18:05
  Speaker 4: vulnerable right now, you know. I've had to go through
• 18:10
  Speaker 4: the process of what if.
• 18:12
  Speaker 1: I don't what if you don't have kids, or what
• 18:14
  Speaker 1: if you don't find a purder? What if you don't have.
• 18:17
  Speaker 4: I mean, but let's be honest. I mean I'm out
• 18:20
  Speaker 4: here dating you know that.
• 18:22
  Speaker 3: Yeah, that's one of my questions.
• 18:28
  Speaker 4: Okay, can we leave for an episode wrapped real quick?
• 18:34
  Speaker 3: No?
• 18:35
  Speaker 4: But I am you know. I I've many a night's
• 18:38
  Speaker 4: laying in bed what if I don't true like truly
• 18:43
  Speaker 4: And I've had to come to the point in my
• 18:45
  Speaker 4: life and accepting that maybe I won't and and if
• 18:50
  Speaker 4: that is my path, I have to It makes me emotional,
• 18:52
  Speaker 4: But if that is my path, then I need to
• 18:54
  Speaker 4: accept that is what it is, and that's okay as well. Uh,
• 19:00
  Speaker 4: but it is really emotional to think that I might
• 19:04
  Speaker 4: go through life without ever having kids. And you can
• 19:07
  Speaker 4: say you will, you will, but we we don't know.
• 19:11
  Speaker 2: I was just going to say, on top of that thing.
• 19:13
  Speaker 4: To have that thought, and I've had many nights of
• 19:16
  Speaker 4: just like crying an emotional turmoil.
• 19:20
  Speaker 2: Would you ever adopt?
• 19:22
  Speaker 4: Yeah? I would, Okay, I would, so yeah, I mean.
• 19:26
  Speaker 5: I've thought about that route too, because you just saying
• 19:29
  Speaker 5: that I'm young. I get that, but like I'm in
• 19:32
  Speaker 5: the same bot of like what if I never do
• 19:33
  Speaker 5: find somebody totally because I do want kids, And then
• 19:37
  Speaker 5: that's the other thing. It's like, okay, well now I
• 19:39
  Speaker 5: have to find it. So I get where you're coming from.
• 19:41
  Speaker 5: But like that was my almost like adoption is there
• 19:45
  Speaker 5: and like there are so many kids in need, and
• 19:48
  Speaker 5: it's like that's something that I can really fall into
• 19:50
  Speaker 5: as well.
• 19:51
  Speaker 2: Yeah totally, which kind.
• 19:52
  Speaker 5: Of helps me because I've gone through what you're going
• 19:54
  Speaker 5: through making to find somebody. When I have a kid,
• 19:57
  Speaker 5: I see what you have and it's like I do
• 19:59
  Speaker 5: want kids. Yeah, So yeah, I get what you're saying.
• 20:02
  Speaker 5: You got me in my feelings and let's get.
• 20:05
  Speaker 4: Spirally on everyone's doing funny side thought, I can't sit
• 20:13
  Speaker 4: how Easton is when my legs are too short.
• 20:15
  Speaker 2: I know.
• 20:15
  Speaker 1: I love the new space because it is just.
• 20:18
  Speaker 4: It's such a bag.
• 20:23
  Speaker 2: Over here or something.
• 20:23
  Speaker 3: You damn.
• 20:27
  Speaker 4: I just had to call it out because Eastern is
• 20:29
  Speaker 4: like sitting all chill and I'm like, sitting here.
• 20:31
  Speaker 2: Really, I really thought.
• 20:33
  Speaker 3: I was like, this is very impressive.
• 20:35
  Speaker 1: You could do it.
• 20:36
  Speaker 4: No, you can't do that. I've stretched you.
• 20:37
  Speaker 1: Yeah, A lot of like am I good?
• 20:39
  Speaker 4: Now?
• 20:42
  Speaker 3: A lot of the workouts that involve like being limper,
• 20:46
  Speaker 3: like girl, you you got to be straight tripping Boom
• 20:49
  Speaker 3: had me to.
• 20:50
  Speaker 2: It the one time. I thought, and you think I'm
• 20:52
  Speaker 2: coming back.
• 20:53
  Speaker 4: Just the workout. We're not talking threading.
• 20:57
  Speaker 1: Here's how I feel off of what you just said.
• 21:00
  Speaker 4: My dating life.
• 21:01
  Speaker 1: We're going to get there.
• 21:04
  Speaker 3: When I think about the future and what that may
• 21:09
  Speaker 3: hold and I and it's always at night where I
• 21:12
  Speaker 3: start the spiraling.
• 21:13
  Speaker 4: Always always I don't meditation.
• 21:16
  Speaker 3: About the brain and what chemical it releases, but it's
• 21:19
  Speaker 3: a release of Now I'm going to take you to
• 21:21
  Speaker 3: the darkest place you've ever been in your life.
• 21:23
  Speaker 4: And I'm like now we start replaying our day and
• 21:27
  Speaker 4: at the end of it, there's nothing else to do
• 21:29
  Speaker 4: except lay there and you're trying You're trying to rest
• 21:31
  Speaker 4: and your brain is kind of playing catch up. Yes,
• 21:34
  Speaker 4: it's it's crazy. I have to play meditation to go
• 21:36
  Speaker 4: to sleep a lot of times.
• 21:37
  Speaker 3: Well, Lisa and I have had these conversations a lot recently,
• 21:41
  Speaker 3: where you know, obviously there are times where you need
• 21:47
  Speaker 3: to seek help from a doctor and get on medication,
• 21:51
  Speaker 3: of course, So I'm not saying take control of your
• 21:54
  Speaker 3: mind and that's the end.
• 21:55
  Speaker 4: All be all.
• 21:55
  Speaker 3: There are situations where you need someone with a medical background.
• 22:02
  Speaker 3: For me, though, when I start going to those places,
• 22:05
  Speaker 3: if my mind is powerful enough to take me to
• 22:08
  Speaker 3: that place, it is certainly powerful enough to say we're
• 22:12
  Speaker 3: ending it here, and now I'm going to take you
• 22:14
  Speaker 3: to a really great place.
• 22:16
  Speaker 1: You can take me low, you can certainly take me high.
• 22:19
  Speaker 1: So I do.
• 22:21
  Speaker 3: And I was talking to a friend yesterday where we
• 22:24
  Speaker 3: were talking about my eye, and you know, I was saying,
• 22:31
  Speaker 3: this is how I've kind of laid it out to
• 22:33
  Speaker 3: have it make sense, because there was something coming up
• 22:35
  Speaker 3: that I was very much looking forward to. And you know,
• 22:39
  Speaker 3: she said, sometimes not everything does happen for a reason.
• 22:41
  Speaker 3: Sometimes just shit happens. And immediately I was like, no,
• 22:45
  Speaker 3: I don't like that at all. I have to I
• 22:48
  Speaker 3: don't like that at all. There had to be a
• 22:50
  Speaker 3: reason behind everything, because that is the way that I
• 22:54
  Speaker 3: keep peace of mind and keep my head above water.
• 22:58
  Speaker 3: I could be so up in the night, we could
• 23:01
  Speaker 3: be dead and gone in the ground. There's nothing after this. Yeah,
• 23:06
  Speaker 3: if I go that route, I know.
• 23:09
  Speaker 4: We're in a dark place. Yeah.
• 23:10
  Speaker 3: What I do know is when I think about the
• 23:12
  Speaker 3: universe and it's structuring my life for me, and my
• 23:15
  Speaker 3: life and path was written in the stars before I
• 23:17
  Speaker 3: even arrived here. I know that that thought makes me peaceful.
• 23:21
  Speaker 3: I know that that thought gives me chills, and I
• 23:22
  Speaker 3: know that there is something beyond just this shell of
• 23:27
  Speaker 3: who I am.
• 23:28
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 23:29
  Speaker 3: For you, I picture you with children, and I picture
• 23:33
  Speaker 3: you having a partner.
• 23:34
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 23:36
  Speaker 3: But I understand going into that dark, dark place of
• 23:41
  Speaker 3: the what if.
• 23:42
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 23:42
  Speaker 3: So I think just having your eggs frozen, knowing that
• 23:45
  Speaker 3: you have you know, you don't expect for your life
• 23:48
  Speaker 3: or your house to burn down, but just in case
• 23:50
  Speaker 3: you have, you know that houses have burned down.
• 23:53
  Speaker 4: Yeah, you know totally.
• 23:55
  Speaker 3: We've seen it on the news. It could very well
• 23:57
  Speaker 3: be your house one day.
• 23:58
  Speaker 1: So what do you do? You get insurance?
• 24:00
  Speaker 3: Unless you live in LA, it's very fucking different.
• 24:01
  Speaker 4: Yeah, but it is.
• 24:05
  Speaker 3: You got your insurance policy.
• 24:08
  Speaker 1: Now.
• 24:08
  Speaker 3: You're very heavy in the dating scene.
• 24:11
  Speaker 1: You're on apps, right, Yes, do you have a favorite app?
• 24:16
  Speaker 4: Well, that's a good question. I wouldn't say I have
• 24:19
  Speaker 4: a favorite one.
• 24:20
  Speaker 2: Is there any apps that you've had more success in?
• 24:24
  Speaker 4: Defined success more.
• 24:26
  Speaker 5: Like I mean multiple days or even success in the
• 24:32
  Speaker 5: men are more interesting or more down your app?
• 24:35
  Speaker 4: I would say all of them. I have met someone
• 24:39
  Speaker 4: that I've dated for a little bit, you know, that's
• 24:43
  Speaker 4: my best way to answer it. I would say certain
• 24:46
  Speaker 4: apps cater for instance, you know, cater more to the
• 24:51
  Speaker 4: entertainment industry.
• 24:52
  Speaker 2: Versus isn't that rayah?
• 24:55
  Speaker 4: Yeah, okay, yeah, so that definitely is more in the
• 24:59
  Speaker 4: entertainment mint field.
• 25:01
  Speaker 2: Which you feel you need.
• 25:04
  Speaker 4: You know, that's that's such a great question. It's something
• 25:06
  Speaker 4: that I've actually been debating lately. You know, everyone's always
• 25:09
  Speaker 4: like write a list, right if you're if you're looking
• 25:12
  Speaker 4: to date, which you know I'm trying to get her, Yes,
• 25:18
  Speaker 4: keep getting about I am where we are doing the thing.
• 25:23
  Speaker 2: She deserves to have some happiness.
• 25:24
  Speaker 3: And I figured out there's always there is always something
• 25:31
  Speaker 3: just wear the patch.
• 25:33
  Speaker 2: There are a lot of guys.
• 25:35
  Speaker 3: It could be pirate, there's a lot of weird fetish.
• 25:39
  Speaker 4: It.
• 25:40
  Speaker 3: I never more enjoying than when I was pregnant. Actually,
• 25:44
  Speaker 3: I was like, where are you guys when I'm not pregnant.
• 25:46
  Speaker 3: I would have been pregnant for.
• 25:47
  Speaker 1: A really long time.
• 25:48
  Speaker 2: There's dudes who like pregnant women.
• 25:50
  Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, but that's also kind of want your sister
• 25:54
  Speaker 4: to date someone who's like has a pregnancy fetish, No, any.
• 25:58
  Speaker 2: Sort of I put the child in you.
• 26:00
  Speaker 5: That's I can have that fetish if I am looking
• 26:03
  Speaker 5: at it like a random girl and like even seeing
• 26:05
  Speaker 5: her like husband and I'm like, she's so fun.
• 26:08
  Speaker 1: There are weird people, all know.
• 26:09
  Speaker 4: Although I will say yours was different because it wasn't
• 26:13
  Speaker 4: like it was from the next like oh.
• 26:17
  Speaker 1: This gout your That is true.
• 26:18
  Speaker 2: They were no man in there. I'm sending my shot.
• 26:22
  Speaker 1: Could I tell you?
• 26:25
  Speaker 3: Podcast with Brittany and we were talking about her dating
• 26:29
  Speaker 3: life and sexy time life, and I was like, I
• 26:32
  Speaker 3: haven't been touched an intimate with a man in over
• 26:36
  Speaker 3: two years, I know, and I go, I know this,
• 26:39
  Speaker 3: and then you know I got pregnant. Yeah, And if
• 26:41
  Speaker 3: you were just some random person, you'd be like, how
• 26:43
  Speaker 3: does that You're saying you haven't anybody, but you got pregnant,
• 26:47
  Speaker 3: so you're a liar. Back to the app. Okay, what
• 26:51
  Speaker 3: about hinge? Hinge?
• 26:53
  Speaker 4: Okay, so Hinge is interesting. There's I was never on
• 26:58
  Speaker 4: Hinge until about a year ago and I was at
• 27:01
  Speaker 4: my girlfriend's house. We were drinking wine, hanging out, and
• 27:04
  Speaker 4: she was scrolling on Hinge and I was like, oh,
• 27:07
  Speaker 4: I was like, these are like real dudes, not just
• 27:09
  Speaker 4: like LA. Right when you think of LA, what do
• 27:11
  Speaker 4: you think of like LA dudes?
• 27:13
  Speaker 1: What do you think of I think of the boys?
• 27:17
  Speaker 3: Good, are very well groomed, uh huh, probably jobless, uh huh.
• 27:23
  Speaker 3: They're on Runnian walking Runnion every single day.
• 27:28
  Speaker 4: We have a really really funny.
• 27:30
  Speaker 3: And they want to go out and they're very healthy,
• 27:33
  Speaker 3: very healthy, Jenna.
• 27:35
  Speaker 1: But do I want to do a bump in the
• 27:36
  Speaker 1: bathroom alway?
• 27:38
  Speaker 3: Is that what they're doing makes zero fucking Sense's skinny?
• 27:43
  Speaker 4: Trying to say skinny guys?
• 27:44
  Speaker 3: Come on, that's no.
• 27:47
  Speaker 4: But I yeah, So when she was scrolling hinge. I
• 27:51
  Speaker 4: was like, oh, these guys have jobs, Like, I was like,
• 27:53
  Speaker 4: they have real jobs. They were like and lawyers, well, doctors, right, but.
• 27:57
  Speaker 2: LA is not that high right now.
• 27:59
  Speaker 4: Right is surrounded by the entertainment industry, right, And I'm
• 28:03
  Speaker 4: a gonna lie. I went into a restaurant the other
• 28:05
  Speaker 4: day in the middle of the day and I walked
• 28:06
  Speaker 4: in and it was packed, and I looked around. I'm like,
• 28:09
  Speaker 4: does anybody here work? And I'm like, literally, looetting ready
• 28:12
  Speaker 4: and I'm like, but I'm here.
• 28:13
  Speaker 3: But I think that all the time all do run
• 28:18
  Speaker 3: into one's in a blue moon. I'm like, these fucking
• 28:20
  Speaker 3: lasers have no job. And then I'm like, but I'm here.
• 28:25
  Speaker 4: That's the exact time that I had. I was like, wait,
• 28:27
  Speaker 4: I just ordered lunch.
• 28:30
  Speaker 1: I'm here, yeah.
• 28:31
  Speaker 4: And I was also here on Monday.
• 28:32
  Speaker 3: No. I literally said to Easton, Yeah, because we've been
• 28:35
  Speaker 3: going through a mental health awakening, and I'm like, we're
• 28:39
  Speaker 3: all just a bunch of mirrors walking around. Yeah, we're
• 28:42
  Speaker 3: all throwing shit at each other, but your shit smells
• 28:45
  Speaker 3: just like my shit, and vice versa, and no one's
• 28:48
  Speaker 3: doing better than the other person, and it's just a crazy,
• 28:54
  Speaker 3: crazy fucking world.
• 28:55
  Speaker 5: The world is wild, and the more I look into
• 28:58
  Speaker 5: the world, and like even driving and just looking around,
• 29:02
  Speaker 5: I'm like, what is going on?
• 29:04
  Speaker 3: Yeah, what what's it for? And what we're gonna say?
• 29:06
  Speaker 4: Well, just to go back into the dating world, you know,
• 29:09
  Speaker 4: it's it's such a crazy time in the sense of
• 29:14
  Speaker 4: there's so many opportunities, right, and it's almost dangerous because
• 29:23
  Speaker 4: we're so quick to cut someone out, which, by the way,
• 29:26
  Speaker 4: like right, I think a really important question is and
• 29:29
  Speaker 4: I actually have this question for both of you guys too.
• 29:31
  Speaker 4: Does dating get harder as we get older or do
• 29:34
  Speaker 4: we just become more aware of who we are and
• 29:35
  Speaker 4: what we want.
• 29:37
  Speaker 1: I adore this.
• 29:39
  Speaker 3: Question so much.
• 29:40
  Speaker 2: It made because I'm still nervous.
• 29:43
  Speaker 3: I'm like, oh god, Personally, yeah, I think it's a
• 29:48
  Speaker 3: combination of both things.
• 29:49
  Speaker 1: And I really hate that answer because I'm black at
• 29:52
  Speaker 1: black or white. I don't like the gray Switzerland answer.
• 29:56
  Speaker 3: But I feel like it's really hard to date because
• 30:00
  Speaker 3: there's so much access. You could literally meet you know,
• 30:03
  Speaker 3: Svetlana in Russia, who's a fucking banger. You live in
• 30:08
  Speaker 3: Los Angeles, and all of a sudden you know someone
• 30:10
  Speaker 3: who you would never fucking know otherwise, Yes, because social media.
• 30:15
  Speaker 4: Well I was gonna say even just Instagram's like a
• 30:17
  Speaker 4: dating app now slide in someone's DMS.
• 30:22
  Speaker 3: But on the flip side, as you get older and
• 30:25
  Speaker 3: you evolve, Yeah, I'm going to speak for my own
• 30:28
  Speaker 3: personal experience. I no longer drink, so I don't have
• 30:31
  Speaker 3: any sort of liquid courage to make me feel you know,
• 30:37
  Speaker 3: I'm I'm not uninhibited. I don't have anything to kind
• 30:42
  Speaker 3: of give me a little bit of like it's all good.
• 30:46
  Speaker 3: I'm hyper focused. I have an out of body experience.
• 30:50
  Speaker 3: Every time I go out. It's like I'm watching myself
• 30:52
  Speaker 3: have conversations with people and that it's not a good feeling,
• 30:58
  Speaker 3: and maybe I'll have to go out and to make
• 31:02
  Speaker 3: that go away. But then I also think about what
• 31:06
  Speaker 3: I've built. Yeah, and I've let people in in a
• 31:10
  Speaker 3: very intimate way emotionally, physically who have turned out to
• 31:16
  Speaker 3: be scary. So that makes me nervous. Yeah, And then
• 31:21
  Speaker 3: you add the layer of I have children, what kind
• 31:24
  Speaker 3: of person are you? You stack all of those things
• 31:28
  Speaker 3: on top of each other, and it becomes debilitating to
• 31:32
  Speaker 3: go out and try to meet somebody.
• 31:33
  Speaker 4: I think you're setting that standard for yourself.
• 31:37
  Speaker 5: I was just gonna say, but I feel like I
• 31:39
  Speaker 5: do this, like I feel like everybody does that.
• 31:41
  Speaker 4: Well, that can go both ways though, Like I'm thirty
• 31:43
  Speaker 4: eight and I don't have kids, right, so I have
• 31:47
  Speaker 4: the same thought as like we're at a point in
• 31:49
  Speaker 4: our lives where a lot of women our age do
• 31:51
  Speaker 4: have kids.
• 31:52
  Speaker 3: Well, then I guess the question is more directed at
• 31:55
  Speaker 3: you then, because you're what's wrong without you?
• 31:58
  Speaker 2: No?
• 31:58
  Speaker 3: No, no, I'm saying, how do you feel that the dating world?
• 32:01
  Speaker 3: You know? Like, what is You're out here and you've
• 32:03
  Speaker 3: you've built something.
• 32:04
  Speaker 1: Great, you know, like, what do you feel is the issue?
• 32:09
  Speaker 1: Is it harder or do you just have higher standards?
• 32:12
  Speaker 4: I hate to say, you know, I'm in that gray
• 32:15
  Speaker 4: area as well, but I it is. It has to
• 32:17
  Speaker 4: be both.
• 32:18
  Speaker 5: I think it's higher standards, but it's wanting what you
• 32:21
  Speaker 5: want and also the people that you're talking to have
• 32:26
  Speaker 5: that as well, and they know what they want.
• 32:29
  Speaker 4: No, sorry, go on, go on, I want to totally
• 32:32
  Speaker 4: keep going.
• 32:32
  Speaker 1: I want to hear you're so excited.
• 32:33
  Speaker 2: No, tell me, tell me.
• 32:35
  Speaker 4: I you think about when we're twenty two, you see
• 32:38
  Speaker 4: someone they're hot, you go out, you get drunk, one
• 32:40
  Speaker 4: night and you hook up. Whatever you do. You wake
• 32:44
  Speaker 4: up the next morning, you're like, should we go grab breakfast? Right?
• 32:48
  Speaker 4: I I want you to leave well now right?
• 32:52
  Speaker 1: Always?
• 32:53
  Speaker 5: I like going to their house so I can leave
• 32:55
  Speaker 5: at four thirty in the morning.
• 32:56
  Speaker 4: Okay, I.
• 32:59
  Speaker 2: Control when when I keep that? Yeah, because there's nothing
• 33:03
  Speaker 2: worse than a lingerer.
• 33:05
  Speaker 4: Oh fuck, do we want to talk about your trauma
• 33:07
  Speaker 4: first or yours?
• 33:08
  Speaker 1: I'm just gonna I think we're No.
• 33:11
  Speaker 4: I think that's both both valid.
• 33:14
  Speaker 2: But I mean to you, when you're doing that, I
• 33:18
  Speaker 2: didn't know what I wanted.
• 33:19
  Speaker 4: You're not. It's thinking about the dynamics. You're not thinking
• 33:22
  Speaker 4: about kids having kids in that moment, right, You're not
• 33:26
  Speaker 4: thinking about is this person going to have the same
• 33:28
  Speaker 4: morning routine that I do?
• 33:31
  Speaker 1: That's what I'm saying, level.
• 33:34
  Speaker 2: Right the ship.
• 33:34
  Speaker 4: You never thought about that before, and now I do.
• 33:37
  Speaker 4: It's one of the main things I think about.
• 33:39
  Speaker 1: Something If you get in.
• 33:40
  Speaker 3: Bed with me at seven o'clock, right and cover your
• 33:43
  Speaker 3: face and castor oil while eating good of cheese and
• 33:46
  Speaker 3: good things while watching.
• 33:48
  Speaker 2: But this is where you're gonna.
• 33:49
  Speaker 1: Have to give him, right, So can I tell you
• 33:53
  Speaker 1: the out of it?
• 33:54
  Speaker 4: Can I tell you how hard it is to date though,
• 33:55
  Speaker 4: being someone who likes to go to bed early on
• 33:57
  Speaker 4: the weekdays, Like, I'm not the person that going to
• 34:00
  Speaker 4: go out in the middle of the week and get
• 34:01
  Speaker 4: wasted on a date.
• 34:05
  Speaker 1: You have to be up to train people.
• 34:06
  Speaker 3: You got your fitness brand, you personal train, which you're
• 34:11
  Speaker 3: very funny about now, like it has to be.
• 34:12
  Speaker 1: A good gig.
• 34:13
  Speaker 3: It has for you to when you go out with somebody,
• 34:18
  Speaker 3: I want to know, is that a deal breaker if
• 34:20
  Speaker 3: they're not a physical person.
• 34:22
  Speaker 4: It's funny because people would be like, oh, she has
• 34:25
  Speaker 4: to date someone who has a six pack who's in
• 34:27
  Speaker 4: the gym all the time. Ironically enough, I prefer someone
• 34:31
  Speaker 4: who isn't as into fitness as I am.
• 34:33
  Speaker 3: Okay, why because you.
• 34:36
  Speaker 4: Know what I've noticed? Then they're tracking me.
• 34:39
  Speaker 3: They're what they're they're tracking me, and I'm like, what
• 34:42
  Speaker 3: she calls herself a personal trainer and she just hate
• 34:45
  Speaker 3: that yeah.
• 34:46
  Speaker 4: Or or or they're like, well, why aren't we in
• 34:48
  Speaker 4: the gym for two hours today? And I'm like, look,
• 34:51
  Speaker 4: I'm I'm a trainer. I love what I do. But
• 34:55
  Speaker 4: I have never been one of those trainer, one of
• 34:57
  Speaker 4: those people who want to spend all day in the gym.
• 35:00
  Speaker 4: All I do right, Like, I'm not the person who
• 35:02
  Speaker 4: wants to go to the gym and then go for
• 35:04
  Speaker 4: a four hour hike afterwords. The worst I don't write.
• 35:08
  Speaker 4: And a lot of people and dudes who are into that.
• 35:13
  Speaker 4: It's very intense and it's like almost like this weird
• 35:18
  Speaker 4: competitive of like what, I don't know.
• 35:22
  Speaker 2: I can see that.
• 35:24
  Speaker 4: I think they have to appreciate fitness, Like I couldn't
• 35:26
  Speaker 4: be with someone who didn't exercise at all.
• 35:27
  Speaker 3: I don't think, right, No, but you wouldn't want to
• 35:29
  Speaker 3: be with a gym head. No, just takes care of Yes,
• 35:35
  Speaker 3: you also have no type, like I've noticed when you
• 35:39
  Speaker 3: show me like you're attracted to.
• 35:42
  Speaker 1: Yeah, except except that.
• 35:46
  Speaker 4: Wait, sometimes I'm like, am I allowed to look into
• 35:49
  Speaker 4: the camera and say accepting dating dating applications right now?
• 35:53
  Speaker 1: Yes, of course you are.
• 35:54
  Speaker 3: It's gonna be all women, but that's okay.
• 35:58
  Speaker 4: No type. I'm just gonna.
• 36:04
  Speaker 1: Do you train me?
• 36:05
  Speaker 3: You train Kristen, Well, she's like four hundred years pregnant.
• 36:08
  Speaker 4: Though I know I am, I gonna have.
• 36:10
  Speaker 2: That kid out, She's gonna do a squat.
• 36:13
  Speaker 3: I actually am very impressed that she's worked out this long.
• 36:16
  Speaker 3: I know you were supposed to train her this morning
• 36:18
  Speaker 3: and she was like, I'm.
• 36:19
  Speaker 1: Good, imps, I can't.
• 36:23
  Speaker 3: Imagine body hurts.
• 36:26
  Speaker 1: That's weird.
• 36:27
  Speaker 3: What do you mean when you go out with your
• 36:29
  Speaker 3: friends who you train like me, for example.
• 36:33
  Speaker 1: When you see what we consume.
• 36:35
  Speaker 3: Like that day that we had worked out and then
• 36:37
  Speaker 3: I downed like an egg McMuffin from mynlds after, were
• 36:40
  Speaker 3: you like, oh my god, or do not even think
• 36:43
  Speaker 3: about it?
• 36:43
  Speaker 4: Oh, that's such a good like, that's such a good point.
• 36:45
  Speaker 4: So for me, I never expect people to do what
• 36:49
  Speaker 4: I do. Okay, I don't because you know how I am.
• 36:53
  Speaker 4: I believe in a sustainable lifestyle and and and truthfully, like,
• 36:57
  Speaker 4: you can eat the egg McMuffin, now, do I prefer
• 36:59
  Speaker 4: that it was healthier food not for McDonald's. Yes, I do, right, yeah,
• 37:04
  Speaker 4: But I'm not here to like deprive you of everything. Now.
• 37:08
  Speaker 4: If you were sitting here complaining about your weight, right, yeah,
• 37:11
  Speaker 4: I don't feel good in my skin, I feel obese,
• 37:14
  Speaker 4: whatever it is, and you were doing that, then I'd
• 37:17
  Speaker 4: be like, let's have a conversation, because the truth is
• 37:20
  Speaker 4: you're making those choices, right, but you don't do that
• 37:22
  Speaker 4: and we talked about this so much. You're like, I
• 37:24
  Speaker 4: want to get a fair ass and I want to
• 37:26
  Speaker 4: feel good, right, And that's and that's what we do,
• 37:28
  Speaker 4: isn't it.
• 37:29
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 37:29
  Speaker 3: My favorite body was when I had just lost my
• 37:32
  Speaker 3: dad and I stopped drinking for like I remember at
• 37:36
  Speaker 3: the time, but I was smoking weed a lot, so
• 37:37
  Speaker 3: I was always eating and I were this Mumma was
• 37:41
  Speaker 3: thick and I was like, I feel that body. And
• 37:45
  Speaker 3: then postpartum with Ocean, postpartum with Sosa was a fucking
• 37:50
  Speaker 3: buzzkill I And people are gonna hate me for saying this,
• 37:54
  Speaker 3: but we all really we don't have right.
• 37:56
  Speaker 4: We shed the weight so quick.
• 37:58
  Speaker 3: But it fell off of me to where I got
• 38:00
  Speaker 3: skeleton again, and I'm like, what the fuck is this?
• 38:02
  Speaker 4: Yeah?
• 38:03
  Speaker 3: With Ocean, I had hips, I had I was feeling myself.
• 38:08
  Speaker 3: I was like, this is the body I've been dreaming of.
• 38:10
  Speaker 3: I'm having twelve kids because I just want to live
• 38:13
  Speaker 3: in this body forever.
• 38:15
  Speaker 4: But I had thirteen children for the body.
• 38:20
  Speaker 3: But everyone battles like I have so many questions for
• 38:23
  Speaker 3: you that will answer in the bonus of how people
• 38:25
  Speaker 3: can bounce back after having a baby. And we talk
• 38:29
  Speaker 3: about this all all the time that you almost have
• 38:34
  Speaker 3: to focus on the way your mental feels because you
• 38:37
  Speaker 3: are always going to want something that you do not have. Yeah,
• 38:41
  Speaker 3: and I don't know why God made us that way.
• 38:43
  Speaker 1: Yeah, but it is what it is.
• 38:48
  Speaker 3: How do you because I I've seen you with your
• 38:51
  Speaker 3: clients and it's not just about the eating, and it's
• 38:56
  Speaker 3: not just about the working out, like you have full
• 39:00
  Speaker 3: conversations about getting the mental right as well, because you're
• 39:04
  Speaker 3: trained to be a life coach.
• 39:05
  Speaker 4: Yeah. By Jay Shetty.
• 39:07
  Speaker 2: Damn.
• 39:08
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 39:08
  Speaker 4: Have you ever heard of him?
• 39:10
  Speaker 3: Has got to beautiful eyes?
• 39:12
  Speaker 4: He does, so does his wife. You're like, how did
• 39:14
  Speaker 4: this happen?
• 39:14
  Speaker 3: No, He's an extremely beautiful man, he is.
• 39:17
  Speaker 1: You know.
• 39:17
  Speaker 4: I think it really comes back to how I became
• 39:21
  Speaker 4: a trainer. Yeah, and you know that we've spoken about
• 39:25
  Speaker 4: this before. I became a trainer because of my anxiety
• 39:28
  Speaker 4: and situational depression. I've always struggled with anxiety. My parents
• 39:33
  Speaker 4: literally had to put a punching bag in our basement
• 39:36
  Speaker 4: when I was a kid.
• 39:37
  Speaker 3: You are so Jersey right now.
• 39:39
  Speaker 2: I love it.
• 39:39
  Speaker 4: Good for your parents, you know, And it's always been
• 39:43
  Speaker 4: something that I've struggled with and dealt with and when
• 39:48
  Speaker 4: my fiance and I broke up, when I stepped away
• 39:51
  Speaker 4: from the Valley right, and and also I mean the
• 39:54
  Speaker 4: valley when stepp away from vander Pump Rules, and when
• 39:59
  Speaker 4: like the show that I was working on stop filming,
• 40:01
  Speaker 4: I went into such a situational depression to the point
• 40:04
  Speaker 4: where my parents were literally like, do we have to
• 40:07
  Speaker 4: bring you home?
• 40:08
  Speaker 1: Right?
• 40:09
  Speaker 4: And what changed my life was exercising again, like almost
• 40:13
  Speaker 4: makes me emotional because it literally changed my life. And
• 40:16
  Speaker 4: the fact that I can help people do that is
• 40:18
  Speaker 4: the biggest gift in the world because I know how
• 40:21
  Speaker 4: hard it was for me and what I went through.
• 40:24
  Speaker 4: And you say it too, like it completely changes your
• 40:26
  Speaker 4: mood and a lot of time it is the last
• 40:28
  Speaker 4: thing I want to do. By the way, me too.
• 40:30
  Speaker 4: I'm human, and I know you feel the same way.
• 40:34
  Speaker 4: But when you finish, it's that moment right after that
• 40:37
  Speaker 4: you just feel like a completely different person. And that
• 40:42
  Speaker 4: is why for me, the mental aspect of health and
• 40:45
  Speaker 4: wellness is so prominent.
• 40:47
  Speaker 3: Yeah, and I also think it got you out of
• 40:50
  Speaker 3: a really dark space. But yeah, cut to where you
• 40:53
  Speaker 3: are now and all the people that you've helped. I
• 40:55
  Speaker 3: also think that in your personal life. It's made you
• 41:00
  Speaker 3: go out into the world with intent.
• 41:04
  Speaker 5: Hm.
• 41:05
  Speaker 4: You know, yeah, I appreciate you saying that when you.
• 41:08
  Speaker 3: Can stack yourself and know that you're you're putting your
• 41:13
  Speaker 3: all into you, then you can go out into the
• 41:16
  Speaker 3: world and you can make those hard decisions like I'm
• 41:21
  Speaker 3: going to freeze my eggs because i don't know what
• 41:23
  Speaker 3: the future holds. I'm going to put myself out there
• 41:26
  Speaker 3: on dating apps and I'm gonna I actually very much
• 41:29
  Speaker 3: admire you.
• 41:29
  Speaker 1: I know, we joke all the time, like Jo's.
• 41:31
  Speaker 3: Got on our four hundreds date for the week, but
• 41:34
  Speaker 3: I like socializing though that's the only bonus for it.
• 41:37
  Speaker 1: But I adore that about you.
• 41:39
  Speaker 3: And I truly believe that the fitness world that you
• 41:44
  Speaker 3: have just put your all into because I believe that
• 41:48
  Speaker 3: your mental is the highest of highs that comes from
• 41:52
  Speaker 3: when you work out. But it's really allowed you to
• 41:56
  Speaker 3: go out into the world and be intentional about what
• 41:58
  Speaker 3: you're doing. Yeah, you know, whether it's whether it's your dating,
• 42:02
  Speaker 3: whether you know you're facing a hard time, you're teed
• 42:06
  Speaker 3: up because you've stacked yourself so perfectly.
• 42:09
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 42:10
  Speaker 4: I I'm like speechless because that means a lot and
• 42:15
  Speaker 4: it is true, but just that you see I mean, look,
• 42:18
  Speaker 4: you're one of my best friends. Of course you see it,
• 42:20
  Speaker 4: but sometimes you know, others see it better than we do.
• 42:23
  Speaker 4: So just to hear it that way is really nice
• 42:25
  Speaker 4: and really refreshing, and I appreciate it. And that is
• 42:28
  Speaker 4: the truth. I mean, even you know it's true.
• 42:31
  Speaker 3: Yeah, and you have how long ago did you start
• 42:34
  Speaker 3: that online fitness?
• 42:36
  Speaker 4: Oh my god? Like the actual like month to month
• 42:38
  Speaker 4: online like real plans and work where like.
• 42:40
  Speaker 3: Yeah, the ones that you post and like you get
• 42:42
  Speaker 3: onto the group, oh god, zooms into your workouts.
• 42:45
  Speaker 4: I love it so much twenty twenty twenty two, Like
• 42:52
  Speaker 4: during COVID twenty twenty one. Yeah, it's become very refined.
• 42:55
  Speaker 4: Like when I, like when I first launched it, it
• 42:57
  Speaker 4: was like, right, COVID hit and you know this I
• 43:00
  Speaker 4: was working on like a ninety day bridal boot camp.
• 43:03
  Speaker 3: Yeah I remember.
• 43:04
  Speaker 4: Do you remember this?
• 43:04
  Speaker 3: Yeah? I do remember.
• 43:05
  Speaker 1: And I created this.
• 43:06
  Speaker 4: Ninety day bridal boot camp for brides, which by the way,
• 43:09
  Speaker 4: I do have. I just don't advertise it anymore. But
• 43:12
  Speaker 4: that's what started all of it. And at the time,
• 43:15
  Speaker 4: it was because the day to day training was so
• 43:17
  Speaker 4: busy and auditioning that I couldn't manage all of it.
• 43:20
  Speaker 4: So I was like, I'm going to create this online
• 43:21
  Speaker 4: program covid hit. There's no acting going on right and
• 43:26
  Speaker 4: no one's getting married. All venues are shut down. So
• 43:29
  Speaker 4: I was like, I have this skeleton of a program, right,
• 43:34
  Speaker 4: ninety day workout plan cater to at home. You helped
• 43:37
  Speaker 4: me promote this, Yeah, And I literally I taught myself
• 43:41
  Speaker 4: how to build out a pay funnel, how to build
• 43:42
  Speaker 4: a landing page. And I was like, I'm going to
• 43:45
  Speaker 4: use the skeleton of this program and teach like a
• 43:47
  Speaker 4: sanity while stuck at home workout plan a two month special.
• 43:51
  Speaker 4: And I literally utilized Facebook.
• 43:54
  Speaker 1: Wow.
• 43:54
  Speaker 4: I used Facebook. I created a private community and I
• 43:58
  Speaker 4: launched it and like right off the bad it was
• 44:02
  Speaker 4: look very fortunate. I got like two hundred members.
• 44:04
  Speaker 2: Wow.
• 44:05
  Speaker 4: And I'm like, oh my gosh. I was like, this
• 44:07
  Speaker 4: is something I and you know what the beauty And
• 44:08
  Speaker 4: I was like, I can reach more people than just
• 44:11
  Speaker 4: my day to day clients. I can help more people
• 44:14
  Speaker 4: and make people feel better as a whole versus just
• 44:17
  Speaker 4: you and me day to day, right, And that is
• 44:20
  Speaker 4: that is a fucking gift.
• 44:22
  Speaker 3: Yeah, it is how do people sign up or learn
• 44:25
  Speaker 3: about learn more about this?
• 44:27
  Speaker 4: Yeah, well, so like basically through time. Now now I
• 44:29
  Speaker 4: have an app. Now it's all refined. Oh nice, Yeah so,
• 44:32
  Speaker 4: and now it's literally like I do personalized month to
• 44:34
  Speaker 4: month meal plans and workout plans.
• 44:36
  Speaker 3: I can people pick and choose, like if they're like, uh,
• 44:39
  Speaker 3: the package where you you do the workout and meal
• 44:41
  Speaker 3: plan little too steep for me right now.
• 44:44
  Speaker 1: I just want to stick to one or the other.
• 44:45
  Speaker 4: One hundred percent. And of course I always say, you know,
• 44:49
  Speaker 4: depending on what your goals are, nutrition and you know,
• 44:53
  Speaker 4: exercise come hand in hand. But one thousand percent. If
• 44:56
  Speaker 4: someone's like I can only do this part or I
• 44:57
  Speaker 4: already have this routine going and you can find the
• 45:01
  Speaker 4: link on my Instagram Miss Jenna Willis link in bio.
• 45:05
  Speaker 1: Ms Jenna Willis.
• 45:07
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I think I first myself actually single forever. This
• 45:10
  Speaker 4: might have missed When I eated my Instagram Mandle, I
• 45:13
  Speaker 4: was like, I think I actually you.
• 45:14
  Speaker 3: Maybe should have done m I at.
• 45:20
  Speaker 1: I love it. You guys asked.
• 45:21
  Speaker 3: A lot of questions, so we're going to deep dive
• 45:24
  Speaker 3: into the bonus and answer those with Jenna.
• 45:27
  Speaker 1: Thank you guys so much.
• 45:28
  Speaker 3: For listening to another episode. Thank you, missus Jenna Willis
• 45:34
  Speaker 3: miss and we will catch you on Monday for the
• 45:37
  Speaker 3: bonus and again Wednesday for a regular old episode.
• 45:40
  Speaker 1: Hi guys,