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Best of The Ben Maller Show · The Ben Maller Show

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Thanks for listening to the best of the Ben Maller
• 0:02
  Speaker 1: Show podcast. Be sure to catch us live every weeknight
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  Speaker 1: from 2 to 6 Eastern, 11 p.m. to 3 a.m.
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  Speaker 1: Pacific on Fox Sports Radio. And to find your local
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  Speaker 1: station for the Ben Maller Show at foxsportsradio.com. You can
• 0:17
  Speaker 1: find it there or stream us live every night on
• 0:20
  Speaker 1: the iHeartRadio app by searching FSR.
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  Speaker 2: This is the best of the Ben Maller Show on
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  Speaker 2: Fox Sports Radio.
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  Speaker 1: From the frozen tundra not quite frozen yet week eight
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  Speaker 1: in the nfl kicked off with a thursday night matchup
• 0:42
  Speaker 1: this was a ho-hum matchup. This doesn't get you all horny.
• 0:47
  Speaker 1: You had Bryce Young and the Panthers traveling clown car
• 0:53
  Speaker 1: that headed to Wisconsin to Lambeau Field for a play
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  Speaker 1: date with Jordan Love and the Packers. The usual suspects
• 1:01
  Speaker 1: were there. Al Michaels, And Chris, who was it? Kirk
• 1:05
  Speaker 1: Herbstreet was there.
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  Speaker 3: Chris who? I don't know. Kirk Herbstreet. Oh, the dog.
• 1:09
  Speaker 1: Peter the dog was there, right? They had Peter the dog.
• 1:12
  Speaker 1: And all those other ex-jocks that just laugh and are
• 1:16
  Speaker 1: really just a reason to have the mute button on
• 1:18
  Speaker 1: that pre- and post-game show.
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  Speaker 3: My God, do they suck over there on Amazon. So
• 1:21
  Speaker 3: I don't know if you're watching or not. Maybe not.
• 1:24
  Speaker 1: Don't worry, we watch so you would not have to.
• 1:26
  Speaker 1: It is our good mitzvah of the day. So it
• 1:29
  Speaker 1: depends on which side of the.
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  Speaker 3: Aisle you're on.
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  Speaker 1: Jordan Love had not one, not two, but three touchdown passes.
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  Speaker 1: Josh Jacobs scored a couple of touchdowns. touchdowns and the
• 1:41
  Speaker 1: Packers withstood not one not two but three turnovers normally
• 1:47
  Speaker 1: when you turn the ball over three times you lose
• 1:49
  Speaker 1: unless you play a crap bag team like Carolina who
• 1:52
  Speaker 1: did attempt a late comeback of course like everything else
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  Speaker 1: they do that failed and so the Packers win by
• 1:58
  Speaker 1: eight points the better story though is in the losing
• 2:01
  Speaker 1: locker room yet another El Stinko The team that's just
• 2:07
  Speaker 1: a few miles away from Tobacco Road there, the old
• 2:10
  Speaker 1: stinker here.
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  Speaker 3: They have been outscored now. Carolina, 70-32 through the last
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  Speaker 3: two games they have played.
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  Speaker 1: They now officially have a losing record. Oh, you're being mean, Maller!
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  Speaker 1: Now the one that's getting killed here is Bryce Young.
• 2:25
  Speaker 1: Bryce Young's getting hammered.
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  Speaker 3: Roasted for his performance, which is understandable if you watch
• 2:30
  Speaker 3: the game. So that is a good jumping-off point.
• 2:33
  Speaker 1: Let us discuss a lot of uproar directed at the
• 2:39
  Speaker 1: quarterback there for the team from North Carolina.
• 2:43
  Speaker 3: So let us discuss.
• 2:44
  Speaker 1: The question is, Carolina Panthers quarterback Bryce Young getting unfairly
• 2:50
  Speaker 1: ripped for his play against Green Bay, or is the criticism.
• 2:56
  Speaker 3: Fair game.
• 2:58
  Speaker 1: So I've got Elon Musk, Wreck-It Ralph, and Swiss Army Knife.
• 3:04
  Speaker 1: And we're going to put all these together. We're going
• 3:06
  Speaker 1: to go for an overnight joyride is what we're going
• 3:08
  Speaker 1: to do. So, A, listen, I didn't need to ask you.
• 3:15
  Speaker 1: I went to Replay Assist. We had an expedited review
• 3:19
  Speaker 1: on Replay Assist. And it turns out the criticism of
• 3:23
  Speaker 1: Bryce Young... Fair game! Fair game! Now, many bleeding hearts
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  Speaker 1: will say, well, Carolina's offensive line was patchwork.
• 3:33
  Speaker 3: And it was. It was. The Panthers were getting bullrushed.
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  Speaker 3: They were.
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  Speaker 1: And Green Bay, a lot of the time, where they're
• 3:41
  Speaker 1: only sending three people, it didn't matter because the offensive
• 3:44
  Speaker 1: line wasn't great.
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  Speaker 3: Here's my argument, though. If you're truly an elite quarterback,
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  Speaker 3: like a guy drafted number one overall in the NFL draft,
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  Speaker 3: you're top-notch quarterback. then you get it done. You get
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  Speaker 3: it done.
• 3:59
  Speaker 1: Bryce Young looked completely overmatched in stretches of this game.
• 4:03
  Speaker 1: He was gasping for breath. And the processor is the problem. Now,
• 4:09
  Speaker 1: if it was like the late 90s and you were
• 4:11
  Speaker 1: using AOL dial-up, that would be fine. However, we're not
• 4:15
  Speaker 1: using dial-up internet anymore. The Panthers needed to contact Elon
• 4:20
  Speaker 1: Musk immediately. And see if they can hook Bryce Young
• 4:23
  Speaker 1: up to that Starlink Wi-Fi. Because his Wi-Fi is slow.
• 4:27
  Speaker 1: It's kind of like the Wi-Fi we have at work now,
• 4:29
  Speaker 1: which blows. We just have great Wi-Fi. We have the
• 4:32
  Speaker 1: top Wi-Fi in radio. And I don't know what happened,
• 4:35
  Speaker 1: but our Wi-Fi sucks. It's kind of like Bryce Young's
• 4:38
  Speaker 1: Wi-Fi sucks. His connections suck. And he continues to be
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  Speaker 1: an enigma. I am always fascinated by the Bryce Young
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  Speaker 1: truthers that are out there. You know, Carolina's got some
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  Speaker 1: decisions to make, whether they want to continue going down
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  Speaker 1: this road and whether to pay the guy or not.
• 4:55
  Speaker 1: We've seen a number of teams get bamboozled into paying
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  Speaker 1: a substandard quarterback. And there's a lot of mediocre dudes
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  Speaker 1: that got paid a lot of money. Look at Justin Herbert.
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  Speaker 1: who sucks for the Chargers. Little Kyler Murray, who's already
• 5:11
  Speaker 1: been fired by the Cardinals, he's now in the Vikings,
• 5:15
  Speaker 1: to a tongue of Iloa.
• 5:17
  Speaker 3: He got paid. Everyone said he blew. He got paid anyway.
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  Speaker 3: It's all because of FOMO. Oh, the fear of missing out.
• 5:24
  Speaker 3: What if this guy goes to another team and becomes good? Well,
• 5:28
  Speaker 3: who cares? He sucks for your team.
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  Speaker 1: Anyway, it's fascinating to see the psychology behind these quarterbacks
• 5:35
  Speaker 1: and how you fanboys, you love your quarterbacks.
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  Speaker 3: My God.
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  Speaker 1: It's very frustrating when you're on this side of the
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  Speaker 1: microphone and every time Bryce has.
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  Speaker 3: A decent performance... It gets celebrated like it's the moon
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  Speaker 3: landing by the.
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  Speaker 1: Marching and Chowder Society. And then every time he goes
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  Speaker 1: out and has a game like this, which he did
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  Speaker 1: on Thursday night, the failures get blamed on somebody else.
• 6:02
  Speaker 1: It's never his fault. It just is not his fault.
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  Speaker 1: Here is Dave Canales, who is not.
• 6:12
  Speaker 3: Long as an NFL coach, but here's Dave Canales saying,
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  Speaker 3: pointing out there are some issues with protection. Take a listen.
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  Speaker 4: Honestly, I just think it comes down to a protection
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  Speaker 4: plan deal for us because when we give Bryce time,
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  Speaker 4: he's shown his ability to be able to spread the
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  Speaker 4: ball around, distribute it, find accurate throws in traffic and
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  Speaker 4: all those things. And I'm confident that when we shore
• 6:33
  Speaker 4: that part up, Bryce will be back in his rhythm,
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  Speaker 4: making his throws that he can.
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  Speaker 3: So the way I interpret that quote is Dave Canales
• 6:40
  Speaker 3: just told you you can't win a championship with Bryce Young.
• 6:44
  Speaker 3: You can't. He just announced right there. What do you mean, Maller? Well,
• 6:49
  Speaker 3: here's what I mean.
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  Speaker 1: If Bryce Young is only good when he gets great protection,
• 6:55
  Speaker 1: you don't get great protection in playoff games.
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  Speaker 3: You're porked. You're screwed. It's over.
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  Speaker 1: Dave Canales just announced we can't win with this guy.
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  Speaker 1: The only way Bryce is an effective NFL quarterback is
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  Speaker 1: if everything was perfect.
• 7:08
  Speaker 3: This just in. Not everything's going to be perfect. Dummy.
• 7:12
  Speaker 3: Here's Bryce Young pointing out that you might want to
• 7:15
  Speaker 3: finish some stuff a little bit better. Take a listen.
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  Speaker 5: We just got to finish better. That's our calling card,
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  Speaker 5: and we didn't get that done today. That's not acceptable.
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  Speaker 2: Calling card.
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  Speaker 5: We fought. It was very, you know, it was ugly,
• 7:25
  Speaker 5: and defense stepped up, gave us a shot. Special teams
• 7:29
  Speaker 5: in the same way. We have to finish. That's all
• 7:31
  Speaker 5: it's about.
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  Speaker 3: Got to finish.
• 7:34
  Speaker 1: Oh, you finished like you usually finish as a loser. Again,
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  Speaker 1: I go back to the it's never Bryce's fault. It's
• 7:41
  Speaker 1: always somebody else's fault.
• 7:43
  Speaker 3: It's like a.
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  Speaker 1: Helicopter mom who refuses to believe their child could do
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  Speaker 1: anything wrong regardless of the evidence.
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  Speaker 3: I used to watch the nightly news. Not many watch
• 7:53
  Speaker 3: the nightly news anymore, but I used to love the
• 7:54
  Speaker 3: nightly news. I used to watch it all the time.
• 7:56
  Speaker 3: And somebody would get arrested for shooting up a bar.
• 8:00
  Speaker 3: And they'd interview the guy's mom. And, oh, he would
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  Speaker 3: never do something like this. He was such a great son.
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  Speaker 3: I don't know what you're talking about. There's video of
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  Speaker 3: him with the gun shooting up the boy. But, no,
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  Speaker 3: he would never do that. It's like the.
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  Speaker 1: Helicopter mom syndrome. Anything wrong, regardless of evidence, he can't
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  Speaker 1: do anything wrong.
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  Speaker 3: You talk about a sweetheart deal. What exactly? Let me
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  Speaker 3: ask you this. Serious question.
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  Speaker 1: What exactly does Bryce Young do at an elite NFL level?
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  Speaker 1: I'll take your answer off the air.
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  Speaker 3: Seriously.
• 8:37
  Speaker 1: Name one thing. I've watched a lot of Bryce Young.
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  Speaker 1: He's been in the NFL a few years now. There's
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  Speaker 1: just no there there.
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  Speaker 3: There's nothing.
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  Speaker 1: Now he gets graded on a curve because Carolina wasted
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  Speaker 1: a number one overall pick on him. If Bryce Young
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  Speaker 1: were a fourth round selection, Fourth round pick. Do you
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  Speaker 1: think we're even having this conversation right now that he's
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  Speaker 1: even still on the team?
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  Speaker 3: It's not a franchise quarterback. It's anywhere close.
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  Speaker 1: Dave Canales just told you we can't win with this
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  Speaker 1: guy because he only plays well when everything's perfect. The
• 9:08
  Speaker 1: coach just told you we can't win with Bryce Young.
• 9:13
  Speaker 1: He used a dog whistle, but that's what he said.
• 9:16
  Speaker 1: That's what he said. He's a very expensive... developmental project
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  Speaker 1: and there's apparently no graduation date he's just going to
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  Speaker 1: continue on and on and on meanwhile to the green
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  Speaker 1: bay side of things so the packers get another win
• 9:34
  Speaker 1: they fatten up the record like a turkey before thanksgiving
• 9:37
  Speaker 1: got to fatten up the record and they got a
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  Speaker 1: pretty good record so what are they five and two
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  Speaker 1: the green bay packers so the question thumbs up Or
• 9:48
  Speaker 1: thumbs down, are Jordan Loves Packers looking more like a
• 9:52
  Speaker 1: legitimate Super Bowl.
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  Speaker 3: Contender as we are now through week eight for Green Bay?
• 9:58
  Speaker 3: So I'm going to go after a... minutes-long deliberation of
• 10:01
  Speaker 3: the available information, which means I sat on my ass
• 10:04
  Speaker 3: and watched the game. I'm going to go thumbs down.
• 10:07
  Speaker 3: I'm going thumbs down.
• 10:08
  Speaker 1: Green Bay is another team whose reputation is considerably more
• 10:13
  Speaker 1: impressive than than an actual performance. Now, I realize I'm
• 10:17
  Speaker 1: talking to a lot of people that own the Green
• 10:19
  Speaker 1: Bay Packers. I have friends of mine that are Packers owners,
• 10:22
  Speaker 1: and I have conversations with them. So I do have
• 10:24
  Speaker 1: some inside information because I have, in my phone, there's
• 10:27
  Speaker 1: at least two people that own part of the Green
• 10:29
  Speaker 1: Bay Packers. And so I've talked to these people who
• 10:31
  Speaker 1: own the team, and they tend to agree with me.
• 10:34
  Speaker 1: In terms of the grade for this performance by Green Bay,
• 10:37
  Speaker 1: on the Maller scorecard, on the Maller scorecard, the Packers
• 10:41
  Speaker 1: get an SM score.
• 10:44
  Speaker 3: What is an SM?
• 10:46
  Speaker 1: Well, SM, that's what I typed in my notes app
• 10:49
  Speaker 1: on my iPhone when I was watching the game.
• 10:52
  Speaker 3: I was doodling some notes down. Well, I can't really
• 10:54
  Speaker 3: doodle on a notes thing, but I was typing. So
• 10:58
  Speaker 3: I wrote down SM as in sporadic malfunction. They're looking
• 11:03
  Speaker 3: like a wagon.
• 11:05
  Speaker 1: For a while, the Green Bay Packers looked like an
• 11:08
  Speaker 1: absolute wagon. The wheels on the wagon go round and round.
• 11:11
  Speaker 1: The wheels on the wagon go round and round. And
• 11:14
  Speaker 1: then one falls off. And something goes, Kerfluey!
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  Speaker 3: And just like that.
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  Speaker 1: Jordan Love plays for a half or three quarters, depending
• 11:24
  Speaker 1: on how you look at it in this game or
• 11:26
  Speaker 1: just any game. He looks like Patrick Mahomes. Like the
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  Speaker 1: good version of Mahomes. And then there's one quarter where
• 11:33
  Speaker 1: it looks like he won a contest as caller 17
• 11:38
  Speaker 1: on a radio call-in line at a FM rock station
• 11:41
  Speaker 1: in And serves up a Wreck-It Ralph special.
• 11:47
  Speaker 3: The Verp. The Verp.
• 11:49
  Speaker 1: And that was the fourth quarter for Jordan Love. He
• 11:52
  Speaker 1: served up a Verp. You know what a Verp is, right?
• 11:53
  Speaker 1: That's where you vomit and burp together.
• 11:56
  Speaker 6: Ew.
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  Speaker 3: And you can taste it. Yeah.
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  Speaker 1: So they carry the Packers a dollar general rushing attack.
• 12:03
  Speaker 3: They've got that.
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  Speaker 1: And you add on some turnovers. They had three in
• 12:08
  Speaker 1: this game. And penalties. Not too many penalties here, but
• 12:14
  Speaker 1: in general there have been a lot of penalties. Nearly
• 12:16
  Speaker 1: squandering a 17-point lead to a pretty bad Carolina team.
• 12:22
  Speaker 1: And Matt LaFleur, the coach, the mastermind behind a team
• 12:26
  Speaker 1: that clearly has some discipline issues, might want to contact
• 12:30
  Speaker 1: the Better.
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  Speaker 3: Business Bureau today. Now, it's not all bad. The defense,
• 12:35
  Speaker 3: they don't have their favorite podcaster, Micah Parsons, who's taking
• 12:39
  Speaker 3: his time coming back. You don't want to rush back
• 12:41
  Speaker 3: when you're the highest paid defensive player in football. Why
• 12:43
  Speaker 3: would you do that?
• 12:44
  Speaker 1: The Packers defense has held five straight opponents to under
• 12:48
  Speaker 1: 20 points. But still, there's a lot of indicators, the
• 12:52
  Speaker 1: key indicators that say there's fraud, that this is just
• 12:55
  Speaker 1: a Kind of like a Steeler team of recent years
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  Speaker 1: where they're good enough to make the playoffs, but they're
• 13:00
  Speaker 1: not really a real threat to do anything in the playoffs.
• 13:03
  Speaker 3: Now to the subplot. Now to the subplot.
• 13:08
  Speaker 1: And we go to the injury room.
• 13:13
  Speaker 3: Yeah, the injury room. A lot going on here. If
• 13:16
  Speaker 3: you were watching the game, you know exactly where I'm
• 13:18
  Speaker 3: going with this. It was.
• 13:20
  Speaker 1: wild and zany and crazy. Christian Watson, a former guest
• 13:25
  Speaker 1: on the Fifth.
• 13:25
  Speaker 3: Hour podcast, by the way, had him at Radio Row
• 13:28
  Speaker 3: a couple years back. But Green Bay wide receiver Christian
• 13:30
  Speaker 3: Watkins suffering a chest injury during the game, and this
• 13:34
  Speaker 3: was a big storyline. Within the game, Watson was injured.
• 13:38
  Speaker 1: He took a deep pass from Jordan Love in the
• 13:40
  Speaker 1: second quarter, landed hard on the Duke, the football, as
• 13:45
  Speaker 1: he was being tackled by a defensive back for Carolina.
• 13:49
  Speaker 1: Watson Revealed after the game, he was coughing up blood
• 13:55
  Speaker 1: like a vampire.
• 13:57
  Speaker 3: Coughing up blood. Perfect for Halloween. And he had some
• 14:01
  Speaker 3: issues breathing. And that led to the Packers, out of
• 14:05
  Speaker 3: an abundance of caution, the medical staff put him in
• 14:08
  Speaker 3: an ambulance with cherry tops on the way to the hospital.
• 14:13
  Speaker 1: They had a CT scan. But how great is it
• 14:16
  Speaker 1: if you're an NFL player? My God, you go right there. Anyway,
• 14:19
  Speaker 1: they had a CT scan. Revealed a fractured rib. However,
• 14:23
  Speaker 1: the doctor said, you know what? There's no internal bleeding here.
• 14:28
  Speaker 1: You're cleared to go back and play. So Watson returned
• 14:31
  Speaker 1: to Lambeau Field, as Al Michaels said, in an ambulance
• 14:35
  Speaker 1: during the third quarter, jogging out of the tunnel. like
• 14:39
  Speaker 1: a professional wrestler, to a thunderous ovation. And despite the
• 14:43
  Speaker 1: fractured rib, Watson did return late in the third quarter,
• 14:46
  Speaker 1: finished with eight receptions, 113 yards, had a crucial late
• 14:51
  Speaker 1: third down conversion.
• 14:52
  Speaker 3: If you're watching the game, you know what I'm talking about.
• 14:54
  Speaker 1: So the Packers, of course, and the NFL being ripped
• 14:58
  Speaker 1: for allowing this to happen.
• 14:59
  Speaker 3: How can you allow this to happen? What's wrong with you? Oh,
• 15:02
  Speaker 3: my God. All right, so the question. What is your word?
• 15:07
  Speaker 3: What is your word.
• 15:09
  Speaker 1: For Christian Watson returning to Lambeau Field in an ambulance
• 15:15
  Speaker 1: and playing the end of the game, playing the end
• 15:18
  Speaker 1: of the game for the Packers? So my word is Scorsese,
• 15:25
  Speaker 1: as in Martin Scorsese, the Hollywood legend. You know that
• 15:28
  Speaker 1: meme with his hands raised, captioned, absolute cinema?
• 15:33
  Speaker 3: That's what this was. Now, if you're old, you might
• 15:36
  Speaker 3: remember in wrestling, it's actually become a meme, so I
• 15:38
  Speaker 3: guess you don't have to be old, but was it
• 15:41
  Speaker 3: Kevin Nash?
• 15:44
  Speaker 1: Remember the famous scene where that was at WCW years ago,
• 15:47
  Speaker 1: 25 years ago.
• 15:48
  Speaker 3: He had a broken leg, and it turned out he
• 15:51
  Speaker 3: didn't have a broken.
• 15:51
  Speaker 1: Leg, and he used the old fake leg in a
• 15:54
  Speaker 1: cast trick and ended up getting back in the ring,
• 15:57
  Speaker 1: and it was really hilarious how they did that.
• 16:00
  Speaker 3: It was similar here.
• 16:02
  Speaker 1: This guy goes from coughing up a nice big chunk
• 16:05
  Speaker 1: of blood, coughing up his guts, goes to the hospital
• 16:08
  Speaker 1: and comes back. Now, I've heard of farm-to-table. I've heard
• 16:12
  Speaker 1: of farm-to-table. This is a new product, hospital-to-huddle. It's a
• 16:16
  Speaker 1: spinoff of farm-to-table.
• 16:17
  Speaker 3: Very organic.
• 16:18
  Speaker 1: I don't know about you, but when I've had to
• 16:20
  Speaker 1: go to the hospital and get checked out, I'm there
• 16:23
  Speaker 1: for eight hours.
• 16:24
  Speaker 3: If you're an NFL player, you're there for ten minutes.
• 16:27
  Speaker 3: It's like, You imagine how many other people must've been
• 16:29
  Speaker 3: in the waiting room at that. Well, it's green Bay.
• 16:31
  Speaker 3: I don't know how many people were there, but the
• 16:33
  Speaker 3: hospital say, all right, you're, you're in line. Uh, wait
• 16:35
  Speaker 3: a minute. It's going to be an extra half hour.
• 16:38
  Speaker 3: Cause or an hour. Cause Christian Watson's coming in from Lambeau.
• 16:41
  Speaker 3: So I'm sorry.
• 16:42
  Speaker 1: I know you're dying, but you know, this guy plays football.
• 16:45
  Speaker 1: So it's much more important. You know, please come on.
• 16:48
  Speaker 3: The coffin of blood, fractured rib, round trip, ambulance ride
• 16:53
  Speaker 3: back on the field. How much is that going to
• 16:55
  Speaker 3: cost the Packers?
• 16:57
  Speaker 6: Seriously.
• 16:57
  Speaker 3: Uh, I know a hospital, an ambulance ride to the hospitals,
• 17:02
  Speaker 3: isn't that like $ 10, 000 or something like that? They charge
• 17:05
  Speaker 3: your insurance.
• 17:06
  Speaker 1: So is that a $ 20, 000 ride to the hospital for
• 17:10
  Speaker 1: Christian Watson? They should have taken Uber back. Would have
• 17:13
  Speaker 1: saved some money. But that is the stuff of legend.
• 17:17
  Speaker 1: And yet the outrage industrial complex hyperventilating, the critics are
• 17:22
  Speaker 1: acting like Matt LaFleur himself, Performed performed meatball surgery at
• 17:27
  Speaker 1: midfield with a Swiss Army knife in front of all
• 17:30
  Speaker 1: the people at Lambeau Field.
• 17:32
  Speaker 3: Spare me.
• 17:33
  Speaker 1: It's the way it is. Watson was cleared by actual
• 17:36
  Speaker 1: doctors at a hospital. Not the team doctors at a hospital.
• 17:41
  Speaker 1: These are people who plausibly took the Hippocratic Oath. Not
• 17:44
  Speaker 1: keyboard physicians and the algorithm and the bot farms in Moldova.
• 17:50
  Speaker 3: OK, not the people with.
• 17:51
  Speaker 1: WebMD degrees in the age of load management where athletes
• 17:56
  Speaker 1: need three business days to recover from a hangnail. Heck,
• 17:59
  Speaker 1: look at Micah Parsons. They said he'd be back in
• 18:03
  Speaker 1: week four, week five. It's now going to be at
• 18:06
  Speaker 1: least week nine. He's not in any rush to come back.
• 18:09
  Speaker 1: But there's Watson.
• 18:10
  Speaker 3: Displaying some old-fashioned intestinal fortitude. And, of course, the Internet world. Oh,
• 18:18
  Speaker 3: my God, it's out of an abundance of caution. It's
• 18:20
  Speaker 3: not safe enough. It's not safe enough. Listen, football, as
• 18:25
  Speaker 3: long as they play, eventually it will become flag football.
• 18:27
  Speaker 3: But for now, it's a collision sport. It is not
• 18:30
  Speaker 3: a wellness retreat. with complimentary lavender-infused herbal tea.
• 18:35
  Speaker 1: That's not what this is. So I say bravo, and
• 18:39
  Speaker 1: it's the thing that you can celebrate. They used to
• 18:41
  Speaker 1: make highlight reels of the toughest players in the NFL.
• 18:45
  Speaker 1: That would be a very short reel these days. That
• 18:47
  Speaker 1: would be a very, very short reel.
• 19:00
  Speaker 7: Welcome to Football Doesn't Lie.
• 19:01
  Speaker 8: Hi, I'm Bill Parcells.
• 19:04
  Speaker 7: And I'm Catherine Zazzora.
• 19:05
  Speaker 8: I have a lot of experience in the game of football, Catherine.
• 19:09
  Speaker 7: And I'm learning the game with Bill's help. Every week,
• 19:11
  Speaker 7: we're going to talk about the NFL slate through the
• 19:14
  Speaker 7: lens of Bill's expertise as he coaches me from novice
• 19:17
  Speaker 7: fan to football expert over the course of the season.
• 19:20
  Speaker 8: You know, I'm looking forward to this show, Catherine, and
• 19:22
  Speaker 8: hopefully we can give our audience a little in-depth look
• 19:26
  Speaker 8: into the inner sanctum of pro football that they can't
• 19:29
  Speaker 8: get anywhere else.
• 19:30
  Speaker 7: Tune in every Thursday for unfiltered stories from Coach Parcells,
• 19:34
  Speaker 7: analysis on the state of the modern game, and education
• 19:37
  Speaker 7: on how football really works.
• 19:39
  Speaker 8: Continuity is very important, but what happens when you get
• 19:43
  Speaker 8: good coaches on your staff and people begin to recognize them,
• 19:47
  Speaker 8: then they want to hire them. And then you can't
• 19:51
  Speaker 8: stop a guy from trying to improve himself but you
• 19:53
  Speaker 8: have to replace.
• 19:54
  Speaker 7: Them Because once you understand what's going on inside the
• 19:58
  Speaker 7: mind of the coaches, you'll understand more about the whole game.
• 20:01
  Speaker 8: So all aspects can be discussed. The only thing I
• 20:04
  Speaker 8: haven't done, because I didn't have enough money, I don't
• 20:07
  Speaker 8: own the team. I never owned a team.
• 20:10
  Speaker 7: Listen to Football Doesn't Lie on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts,
• 20:14
  Speaker 7: or wherever you get your podcasts.
• 20:19
  Speaker 3: As this Halloween weekend is upon us and we celebrate
• 20:24
  Speaker 3: the legends of the Malheur Militia that have crossed the
• 20:27
  Speaker 3: pearly gates and I got a Message on my Maler
• 20:31
  Speaker 3: Ouija board from Masshole Mickey in Boston. He said, Maler,
• 20:36
  Speaker 3: you've got to let the good people know about Fox.
• 20:39
  Speaker 3: When I said, are you sure, Masshole Mickey? He said, yes.
• 20:41
  Speaker 1: And by the way, Rick in Boston says hello. Well,
• 20:44
  Speaker 1: I said, well, that's great. I used to love Rick
• 20:45
  Speaker 1: in Boston's phone calls back in the day. There's nothing
• 20:49
  Speaker 1: like live. Nothing like live.
• 20:53
  Speaker 3: Oh, my God. It's so great. it's so great nothing
• 20:56
  Speaker 3: like live this fall every nfl on fox game streams
• 20:58
  Speaker 3: live on fox one every sunday every rivalry miss it
• 21:02
  Speaker 3: live you're just watching the highlight catch every play as
• 21:06
  Speaker 3: it happens nfl on fox streaming on fox one the
• 21:12
  Speaker 3: great captain jack a friend of the show the great
• 21:15
  Speaker 3: john namo captain jack and Skeeter in Montana also reached out,
• 21:20
  Speaker 3: and they said, hey, Mahler. I said, what? Let people
• 21:23
  Speaker 3: know about DraftKings. I said, okay. If you want that,
• 21:26
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• 21:34
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• 21:34
  Speaker 1: Favorite NBA stars, get excited about the biggest matchups, and
• 21:38
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• 21:41
  Speaker 3: And with DraftKings, it's all in one app. Right now,
• 21:44
  Speaker 3: use the promo code Mahler to claim your special offer today.
• 21:47
  Speaker 3: At DraftKings, again, that's promo code MALLER at DraftKings. The
• 21:51
  Speaker 3: crown is yours. And I think, if I'm not mistaken here,
• 21:56
  Speaker 3: I got this memo about the Bull, about Wee Bull.
• 22:00
  Speaker 5: You're not mistaken.
• 22:02
  Speaker 3: Yeah, the rain is saying I'm not mistaken, so that
• 22:04
  Speaker 3: means I've got to tell you about Webull. And I
• 22:06
  Speaker 3: don't mind telling you about Webull. I like talking about Webull.
• 22:09
  Speaker 8: I do.
• 22:09
  Speaker 3: It's time to get your financial portfolio game ready with Webull.
• 22:14
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• 22:19
  Speaker 3: Get started by downloading the Webull app today or visiting Webull.com.
• 22:24
  Speaker 3: The Great Lake, Frank Pollock, Fox Sports Radio legend, he
• 22:26
  Speaker 3: reached out across the pearly gates. He said, you've got
• 22:28
  Speaker 3: to do that copy. I said, I'll do it. And
• 22:30
  Speaker 3: I did it. I got to do legalese, by the way, Frank.
• 22:32
  Speaker 3: Goes to Frank Pollock.
• 22:33
  Speaker 1: Webull Financial, LLC, member SIPC, FINRA, investing involves risk. For
• 22:38
  Speaker 1: more information, visit webull.com slash disclosures. And we do have
• 22:45
  Speaker 1: Benny versus the Penny coming up in a little bit.
• 22:47
  Speaker 1: We'll break down every game in the NFL. Well, not
• 22:51
  Speaker 1: every game will be picked, but we handpicked eight games
• 22:54
  Speaker 1: on the Facebook page and Instagram page. You'll get all
• 22:58
  Speaker 1: of the picks online. against the spread, so you have
• 23:01
  Speaker 1: that to look forward to. But here on the radio,
• 23:03
  Speaker 1: because of timing reasons, we'll pick the eight most important games,
• 23:08
  Speaker 1: the eight most important games. It's a little thing we
• 23:10
  Speaker 1: call Benny versus the Penny, and it'll be coming up
• 23:13
  Speaker 1: here in a little bit. Our lead this hour, though,
• 23:16
  Speaker 1: from the swap meet, the flea market, and another day,
• 23:20
  Speaker 1: another trade.
• 23:20
  Speaker 3: I'm in. I'm in. I like this new NFL, new
• 23:23
  Speaker 3: world order.
• 23:25
  Speaker 1: For years, the NFL was bad about making trades, and
• 23:29
  Speaker 1: we've seen a good number of trades this week.
• 23:31
  Speaker 3: Now, remember, we still have a little less than two
• 23:35
  Speaker 3: weeks before the trade deadline, so typically things don't pick
• 23:39
  Speaker 3: up until right before the deadline, but there's a lot
• 23:41
  Speaker 3: of moving parts as we speak. If you've not heard,
• 23:44
  Speaker 3: perhaps not, we learned. The Bears. The Bears went out
• 23:49
  Speaker 3: and made a big splash move.
• 23:50
  Speaker 1: They acquired all-pro defensive tackle Jeffrey Simmons. Yep, that guy
• 23:56
  Speaker 1: from the Tennessee Titans. Now, it's being called a blockbuster trade.
• 24:01
  Speaker 1: The reason is because Jeffrey Simmons has an all-pro, and
• 24:05
  Speaker 1: the Chicago Bears gave up not one, but.
• 24:08
  Speaker 3: Two, two first-round picks, 2027-2028, plus....
• 24:14
  Speaker 1: A fourth-round pick to the Tennessee football team in exchange
• 24:18
  Speaker 1: for Jeffrey Simmons and a fifth-round pick. There will be
• 24:22
  Speaker 1: a quiz on that later. Simmons, we are told, is 29,
• 24:27
  Speaker 1: and he had four sacks in seven games this season
• 24:30
  Speaker 1: for a dog food, dog food team in Nashville and
• 24:36
  Speaker 1: leads all defensive tackles with 28 pressures. That is according
• 24:41
  Speaker 1: to the NFL nerd department. The Dorkville USA next-gen stats.
• 24:46
  Speaker 1: 28 pressures leading the NFL. In fact, he's the only
• 24:50
  Speaker 1: NFL player, we are told, with three sacks against double teams.
• 24:54
  Speaker 1: So he's got that going for him. It's a good
• 24:55
  Speaker 1: jumping-off point. Let us discuss. You know how we operate
• 24:59
  Speaker 1: in these parts when there's a big trade. We go
• 25:02
  Speaker 1: right to the judges' scorecards. So how do you grade?
• 25:06
  Speaker 3: Here's the question. Here's the question. Let's discuss.
• 25:09
  Speaker 1: How do you grade the Bears' deal with for all-pro
• 25:12
  Speaker 1: defensive tackle Jeffrey Simmons from the Titans. So I've got
• 25:16
  Speaker 1: Monster Energy Drink, Hobby Lobby, and Louisiana Purchase. And we'll
• 25:23
  Speaker 1: combine all of these things together.
• 25:26
  Speaker 3: We're going to go full tilt boogie. We're going to
• 25:28
  Speaker 3: do the boogie woogie is what we're going to do. Now,
• 25:30
  Speaker 3: number one. Number one. One, one, one, one, one, one, one.
• 25:35
  Speaker 3: Number one.
• 25:35
  Speaker 8: Number one.
• 25:35
  Speaker 3: All right.
• 25:36
  Speaker 6: Stop. Stop.
• 25:40
  Speaker 1: Right to the Maller scorecard. I'm going to start with Chicago.
• 25:44
  Speaker 1: Chicago gets an A + + +. Let me repeat
• 25:50
  Speaker 1: that for those of you a little slow in the
• 25:51
  Speaker 1: back of the room. Chicago gets an A + + +.
• 25:55
  Speaker 1: We'll get to Tennessee in a minute. The Chicago Bears
• 25:57
  Speaker 1: did not just upgrade their defensive line. They have installed
• 26:01
  Speaker 1: a 300-pound human wrecking ball that occasionally wears shoulder pads.
• 26:08
  Speaker 3: Jeffrey Simmons. Now, if you were to say, what is
• 26:11
  Speaker 3: this guy?
• 26:11
  Speaker 1: He's a monster energy drink wearing a helmet, which is
• 26:14
  Speaker 1: good because he is going to be deputized. The reason
• 26:18
  Speaker 1: the Bears made this move, they're saying this guy is
• 26:20
  Speaker 1: a monster energy drink, and he is going to put
• 26:23
  Speaker 1: the monster back in the monsters of the midway defensively.
• 26:27
  Speaker 3: Chicago had gone from overnight in just one day. It
• 26:34
  Speaker 3: was a daytime trade, but essentially overnight, right, from a
• 26:37
  Speaker 3: studio apartment with a broken toilet, to an 11-bedroom chateau
• 26:42
  Speaker 3: with a moat and a drawbridge and a butler named Jeeves.
• 26:47
  Speaker 3: They get all that, right? And yet, I love the
• 26:50
  Speaker 3: fact that this is a no-brainer, home-run trade.
• 26:54
  Speaker 1: Even I, who criticizes everything, think the Bears absolutely hit
• 26:59
  Speaker 1: it out of the park on this, and it was
• 27:00
  Speaker 1: a great trade for the Bears.
• 27:02
  Speaker 3: And my friends from Chicago, guys like Tree and Faze
• 27:05
  Speaker 3: and Eugene and all the guys that are friends of
• 27:07
  Speaker 3: the show that support the show in the Windy City
• 27:10
  Speaker 3: should be very happy, right? Yet the stat nerd brigade
• 27:14
  Speaker 3: are hyperventilating. You gave up too much. You shipped away
• 27:19
  Speaker 3: two first-round draft picks. What's wrong with you? Boo-hoo-hoo.
• 27:26
  Speaker 5: Please.
• 27:27
  Speaker 1: You know, we have a word for people that obsess
• 27:31
  Speaker 1: over first-round draft picks.
• 27:32
  Speaker 3: It's called loser. OK, loser, loser, loser, loser. F them picks.
• 27:41
  Speaker 3: F them picks.
• 27:42
  Speaker 1: Teams trying to win trophies make trades for all pro
• 27:46
  Speaker 1: players because all pro players are good at football. I'm
• 27:51
  Speaker 1: not talking Pro Bowl because they don't even do the
• 27:54
  Speaker 1: Pro Bowl anymore. The Pro Bowl is a joke. I'm
• 27:56
  Speaker 1: talking about all pro status.
• 27:58
  Speaker 3: That matters. And if you want to have the man,
• 28:02
  Speaker 3: you got to pay for the man. And draft picks
• 28:05
  Speaker 3: are the currency and they're a tool in your toolbox
• 28:08
  Speaker 3: to improve the roster, whether that's five years from now
• 28:12
  Speaker 3: or right now. And it's like, well, I'll pay on
• 28:15
  Speaker 3: the credit card and I got to give up some
• 28:17
  Speaker 3: draft picks. Well, who cares? This is the window of opportunity.
• 28:21
  Speaker 3: That is the message.
• 28:22
  Speaker 1: I love it because the message from ownership and from
• 28:24
  Speaker 1: the front office is this team is good enough to
• 28:27
  Speaker 1: win a Super Bowl this year and. This is our
• 28:30
  Speaker 1: way of giving you a vote of confidence and validating
• 28:34
  Speaker 1: what is going on as legit.
• 28:36
  Speaker 3: That's what this is. And so the draft pick, it's
• 28:39
  Speaker 3: not a family heirloom. It's not.
• 28:40
  Speaker 1: It's something you can trade, and the Rams trade almost
• 28:43
  Speaker 1: all their picks, and they win, and they win, and
• 28:45
  Speaker 1: they win, and they're in the playoffs just about every year.
• 28:47
  Speaker 1: And occasionally they'll win a Super Bowl. Chicago's not building
• 28:51
  Speaker 1: a master plan for 2032. This is going to shock
• 28:56
  Speaker 1: a lot of you, but they're trying to win a Super.
• 28:57
  Speaker 3: Bowl this in the hood in Englewood and up to
• 29:01
  Speaker 3: no good on Valentine's Day of next year.
• 29:05
  Speaker 1: They want to win a Super Bowl before we're all
• 29:07
  Speaker 1: in a nursing home collecting Social Security. They would like
• 29:10
  Speaker 1: to actually win before that happens.
• 29:11
  Speaker 3: All right, now to the other side of the aisle,
• 29:15
  Speaker 3: page two, Music City. This is definitely not the Music
• 29:19
  Speaker 3: City miracle. So the question for the team from Tennessee is,
• 29:25
  Speaker 3: What is your view on Robert Sala's Titans unloading Jeffrey
• 29:30
  Speaker 3: Simmons for a couple of first-round picks?
• 29:33
  Speaker 1: So on the Maller scorecard for Tennessee, I wrote down
• 29:36
  Speaker 1: a C-. a C- for the Tennessee Titans.
• 29:43
  Speaker 3: Here's why. You have traded a proven commodity, a Picasso.
• 29:50
  Speaker 3: You have a Picasso. You have gone down... And made
• 29:55
  Speaker 3: a deal. You've sold your Picasso for a Hobby Lobby
• 29:58
  Speaker 3: gift card. And maybe you'll be able to paint something
• 30:02
  Speaker 3: nice someday. But this is a classic suck and dump.
• 30:07
  Speaker 3: You suck. You draft. You develop. Every once in a while,
• 30:11
  Speaker 3: you get a good player. You dump the player and
• 30:13
  Speaker 3: repeat the process. It is a pyramid scheme is what
• 30:17
  Speaker 3: it is. It's a Ponzi scheme.
• 30:19
  Speaker 1: With shoulder pads running on a hamster wheel of mediocrity.
• 30:25
  Speaker 1: And how about Robert Sala? This guy was brought in.
• 30:29
  Speaker 1: There were two things that he was supposed to do.
• 30:32
  Speaker 1: Fix the defense. and have Cam Ward playing at a
• 30:36
  Speaker 1: high level. Those were the two things he was deputized
• 30:39
  Speaker 1: to do.
• 30:40
  Speaker 3: How is that going? Can we do a wellness check
• 30:43
  Speaker 3: on how that's going for Robert Sala? Again, two things.
• 30:48
  Speaker 3: The defense, you got to get that going, and you
• 30:52
  Speaker 3: got to figure out Cam Ward. All right, so let's
• 30:55
  Speaker 3: start with Cam Ward. So Cam Ward was the number
• 30:58
  Speaker 3: one overall pick. Number one.
• 31:01
  Speaker 1: And at this moment, Cam Ward is the 31st ranked
• 31:06
  Speaker 1: quarterback in the NFL. He is worse than Jameis Winston,
• 31:11
  Speaker 1: who's the backup for the Giants, and Malik Willis, a
• 31:15
  Speaker 1: former Tennessee Titan bust of a quarterback. And yet Cam Ward,
• 31:20
  Speaker 1: with Robert Sala and his positivity and Brian Dayball and
• 31:25
  Speaker 1: all that, is still, you look, you got to go
• 31:27
  Speaker 1: page down. And you've got to go page down and
• 31:30
  Speaker 1: all that. Now you say, well, the defense, I'm sure
• 31:32
  Speaker 1: the defense is doing really well. So you've got to
• 31:35
  Speaker 1: give them credit on that, the Tennessee defense.
• 31:38
  Speaker 3: Well, let's see here. Oh, they're 26th in the NFL.
• 31:41
  Speaker 6: Okay.
• 31:42
  Speaker 3: That sucks.
• 31:44
  Speaker 1: Yeah. So the Titans, of course, not only bad now,
• 31:47
  Speaker 1: they have naturally gotten rid of their top defensive player,
• 31:50
  Speaker 1: which is frickin brilliant.
• 31:52
  Speaker 5: Right.
• 31:52
  Speaker 3: What's next? The Nashville Fire Department's going to say, hey,
• 31:55
  Speaker 3: we don't need fire trucks anymore. Why don't we sell
• 31:57
  Speaker 3: our fire trucks? I guess what they did in L.A.
• 31:59
  Speaker 3: when the mayor allowed the city to burn down. Well,
• 32:01
  Speaker 3: they just got rid of water. They said, we don't
• 32:03
  Speaker 3: need water anymore. Let's just let the Palisades burn. And
• 32:07
  Speaker 3: that's great. Wonderful.
• 32:08
  Speaker 8: Wonderful.
• 32:08
  Speaker 3: Anyway, the Titans, the Titans are basically the AAA Nashville
• 32:14
  Speaker 3: sounds of professional football. They're a feeder franchise, and it's
• 32:18
  Speaker 3: the oldest trick in the book, the con, the big
• 32:22
  Speaker 3: con of professional sports. You sell the future so nobody
• 32:28
  Speaker 3: examines the present, and people always buy the future. They
• 32:32
  Speaker 3: always buy the futures.
• 32:34
  Speaker 1: And the Tennessee Titans are the NFL's version of a
• 32:37
  Speaker 1: government construction project. You know, the pork barrel spending, billions
• 32:42
  Speaker 1: of dollars spent, years of promises, kind of like the
• 32:45
  Speaker 1: high-speed rail in California, right? Ah, we're going to give
• 32:49
  Speaker 1: you a high-speed rail by 2020.
• 32:50
  Speaker 3: Really?
• 32:51
  Speaker 8: Okay.
• 32:52
  Speaker 3: Find me where that is. Yes. How much money? Is
• 32:55
  Speaker 3: it $ 20 billion? Okay, that seems like it's good spending there.
• 32:58
  Speaker 3: That's essentially what this is, right? The NFL's version of
• 33:00
  Speaker 3: government construction spending. where billions are spent, a lot of promises,
• 33:06
  Speaker 3: and as.
• 33:06
  Speaker 1: Soon as something finally works, like you actually draft somebody
• 33:09
  Speaker 1: that knows how to play Jeffrey Simmons, you tear it
• 33:11
  Speaker 1: down and start over.
• 33:13
  Speaker 3: You tear it down and start over. That's the way
• 33:15
  Speaker 3: to do it. All right, final point to the family
• 33:20
  Speaker 3: room we go.
• 33:21
  Speaker 1: Now, shortly after the Bears acquired Jeffrey Simmons in this
• 33:24
  Speaker 1: blockbuster trade, which the media elites tell me is a
• 33:27
  Speaker 1: blockbuster trade, Micah Parsons' brother decided to enter the chat.
• 33:33
  Speaker 3: What? Yeah, so the reason I'm bringing this up, I
• 33:36
  Speaker 3: thought it was hilarious because his brother, Micah Parsons, who's
• 33:39
  Speaker 3: a former NFL player, he's a cheerleader and a podcast guy.
• 33:43
  Speaker 3: He lives in Green Bay, though. So his brother posted
• 33:46
  Speaker 3: a not-so-subtle shot on social media. He said the following.
• 33:52
  Speaker 3: This is after Jeffrey Simmons was traded from the team
• 33:55
  Speaker 3: in Nashville to the team in Chicago. He said, man,
• 33:59
  Speaker 3: that Micah Parsons trade just looks better and better. No
• 34:03
  Speaker 3: way the Cowboys don't get three first and two first
• 34:08
  Speaker 3: and a second for a 26-year-old pass rusher.
• 34:12
  Speaker 1: And he's just talking out of his ass. That was
• 34:13
  Speaker 1: from somebody named Terrence Parsons Jr., the brother of Micah Parsons.
• 34:19
  Speaker 1: So here's the question on this one. You've got Micah Parsons'
• 34:22
  Speaker 1: older brother, who is once again mocking the Dallas Cowboys
• 34:27
  Speaker 1: for trading his brother to Green Bay. So how does
• 34:31
  Speaker 1: that stick to your ribs? Well, kind of like a
• 34:35
  Speaker 1: brotherly shove.
• 34:36
  Speaker 3: It's like a push. It's like a shove right there, yeah.
• 34:40
  Speaker 3: So Terrence Parsons Jr.
• 34:42
  Speaker 1: Is back running, not with the Bulls in Pamplona.
• 34:45
  Speaker 3: He's not running a marathon. He's just running his mouth
• 34:49
  Speaker 3: about the Cowboys, like the family purchase deal. The family
• 34:53
  Speaker 3: pulled off the Louisiana purchase.
• 34:54
  Speaker 1: They went out and they made this move. Oh, my God,
• 34:56
  Speaker 1: this is like the Louisiana purchase. It's psychoneurotic is what
• 35:01
  Speaker 1: it is. We're guessing the Packers would love a mulligan.
• 35:05
  Speaker 1: They would absolutely love a mulligan. They thought they were
• 35:08
  Speaker 1: getting Lawrence Taylor 2.0. It turns out that Micah Parsons
• 35:12
  Speaker 1: is guilty of false advertising. They have gotten a part-time
• 35:16
  Speaker 1: pass rusher, full-time podcaster, influencer, and occasionally... the highest-paid male
• 35:24
  Speaker 1: cheerleader in the NFL, certainly in the state of Wisconsin.
• 35:28
  Speaker 1: So the Maller theory on this is it's bilateral. Bilateral,
• 35:33
  Speaker 1: meaning that not only do the Green Bay Packers wish
• 35:36
  Speaker 1: they could have that trade back, but deep down, the
• 35:39
  Speaker 1: Parsons family, they miss Dallas more than Dallas misses them.
• 35:45
  Speaker 1: And just from what we know of the public persona
• 35:48
  Speaker 1: of Micah Parsons, Micah loves attention. Like a Kardashian loves
• 35:53
  Speaker 1: a camera and a camera crew and a microphone. And
• 35:56
  Speaker 1: in Green Bay, Micah Parsons is competing for headlines with
• 36:00
  Speaker 1: the latest foam cheese products that come out and ice
• 36:05
  Speaker 1: fishing on Lake Winnebago and the Friday fish fry.
• 36:10
  Speaker 3: That's his competition.
• 36:11
  Speaker 1: The Cowboys provided a 24-hour publicity machine. And now Micah Parsons'
• 36:17
  Speaker 1: brother is desperately trolling Jerry Jones to try to stay
• 36:22
  Speaker 1: relevant and all that stuff. They traded Jerry's World soap
• 36:26
  Speaker 1: opera for a frozen dairy co-op is what the Parsons
• 36:32
  Speaker 1: family did.
• 36:34
  Speaker 3: And it's great. I love seeing Micah Parsons on the
• 36:36
  Speaker 3: sidelines cheering. He really is.
• 36:39
  Speaker 1: Packers don't have cheerleaders unless you want to just consider
• 36:43
  Speaker 1: Micah the one-man cheerleading band.
• 36:45
  Speaker 3: And then that's it.
• 36:46
  Speaker 2: Be sure to catch live editions of the Ben Maler
• 36:49
  Speaker 2: show weekdays at 2 a.m. Eastern, 11 p.m. Pacific. Knock, knock.
• 36:55
  Speaker 3: Who's there? Lame week.
• 36:56
  Speaker 2: Lame week who?
• 36:58
  Speaker 3: It's Big Ben's lame joke of the week. That it is,
• 37:02
  Speaker 3: this portion of the Matt Maller Show on Fox, made
• 37:04
  Speaker 3: possible by Fox One. There's nothing like live. This fall,
• 37:07
  Speaker 3: every NFL on Fox game streams live on Fox One.
• 37:10
  Speaker 3: Every Sunday, every rivalry. Miss it live, you're just watching
• 37:13
  Speaker 3: a highlight. Catch every play as it happens. NFL on Fox,
• 37:17
  Speaker 3: streaming on Fox One. Here's my friend Billy from Florida there. Hello, Billy.
• 37:22
  Speaker 3: Of course I'm here. Anytime you want me to be
• 37:25
  Speaker 3: on the fifth hour, just call. Here we go. You've
• 37:28
  Speaker 3: got to wait your turn.
• 37:29
  Speaker 2: Okay, no problem.
• 37:32
  Speaker 3: I got people that want to be part of it.
• 37:33
  Speaker 3: I'll get you on again. I'll get you on again.
• 37:35
  Speaker 3: All right, here we go. These are actual jokes by
• 37:39
  Speaker 3: actual listeners. If you'd like to send jokes in in
• 37:41
  Speaker 3: a future episode, send them care of... The Ben Maler
• 37:45
  Speaker 3: Show email address, benmalershow at gmail.com. Here we go. Weed
• 37:48
  Speaker 3: Man could not find a Herman Munster costume for Halloween.
• 37:52
  Speaker 3: Do you hear about this? No, why? Yeah, so now
• 37:56
  Speaker 3: you're going to be going as Herman Dumpster. So that's
• 37:59
  Speaker 3: your costume. He's trash. It's Eek in Roseville, Minnesota. Why
• 38:04
  Speaker 3: doesn't Weed Man care about the time change coming up
• 38:07
  Speaker 3: this weekend?
• 38:07
  Speaker 8: There's no time change coming up.
• 38:11
  Speaker 1: There you go, because it's always high time where he is, baby.
• 38:15
  Speaker 3: That's Michael in Tulsa. You really don't know about the
• 38:19
  Speaker 3: time change this weekend, Weed Man?
• 38:21
  Speaker 6: Really?
• 38:21
  Speaker 2: There is no time change.
• 38:22
  Speaker 3: Trump said there wasn't.
• 38:23
  Speaker 8: Going to be one, right?
• 38:25
  Speaker 1: Well, he said that, but they haven't switched it yet.
• 38:28
  Speaker 1: I think Congress has to switch it.
• 38:30
  Speaker 3: What's the only candy Weed Man gets when he goes trick-or-treating?
• 38:35
  Speaker 3: What kind? Dumb Dumbs. That's Eek in Roseville, Minnesota. That
• 38:39
  Speaker 3: last joke was from Michael in Tulsa. Why did Weed
• 38:44
  Speaker 3: Man go trick-or-treating as a ghost? Why? Well, apparently you
• 38:48
  Speaker 3: were already high as a kite and wanted to be
• 38:50
  Speaker 3: a free spirit. So that's why. That's Leo from Chicago.
• 38:55
  Speaker 3: Why does Weed Man need... My phone changed by itself,
• 38:58
  Speaker 3: as they ask you, right? Yeah, it'll change by itself.
• 39:01
  Speaker 3: Why doesn't Weed Man need a haunted house on Halloween? Why?
• 39:06
  Speaker 1: Well, apparently your sofa already feels like one after three
• 39:09
  Speaker 1: hits and a bag of chips, so you're good on.
• 39:13
  Speaker 3: That, Weed Man. That's from Kevin from Parts Unknown sent
• 39:17
  Speaker 3: that one in. Big Ben's Lame Jokes of the Week.
• 39:20
  Speaker 3: Surfer Todd, the comedian, the multi-time platinum joke writer sent
• 39:24
  Speaker 3: this in. What does Lisa say about Weed Man's lifetime
• 39:28
  Speaker 3: subscription to Playboy?
• 39:30
  Speaker 5: What?
• 39:32
  Speaker 3: She says he has a lot of issues. A lot
• 39:35
  Speaker 3: of issues. Oh, that's good. That's good. Oh, she's there.
• 39:40
  Speaker 3: There she is. That's Lisa. There she is. What do
• 39:44
  Speaker 3: you call it when Lisa dresses up as Weed Man
• 39:47
  Speaker 3: for Halloween?
• 39:49
  Speaker 6: What?
• 39:50
  Speaker 3: Well, she'd be a weed woman, is what she would be.
• 39:52
  Speaker 3: That's a Noah in Austin, is what that is. Rosie
• 39:58
  Speaker 3: the teacher from Omaha sent this in. Did you hear
• 40:00
  Speaker 3: about Weed Man Hippie's Halloween-y party costume? No, what happened? Yeah, yeah,
• 40:06
  Speaker 3: apparently you're going as Mike the Leprechaun all the way
• 40:08
  Speaker 3: down to the green jockstrap that says, kiss my shillelagh.
• 40:13
  Speaker 3: You'll be wearing that. There you go. Well, President Weed
• 40:18
  Speaker 3: Man wants to legalize weed everywhere. Absolutely. Yeah, you plan
• 40:23
  Speaker 3: on having a joint session with Congress there, Weed Man.
• 40:27
  Speaker 3: That's Mike the Leprechaun. All right, what happened to Weed
• 40:31
  Speaker 3: Man's children when he got divorced?
• 40:33
  Speaker 7: What?
• 40:37
  Speaker 1: He got joint custody. That's from Mike the Leprechaun. There
• 40:41
  Speaker 1: you go.
• 40:42
  Speaker 3: All right. I think that's all we have time for.
• 40:45
  Speaker 3: So thanks to everybody. If I didn't get your jokes on,
• 40:46
  Speaker 3: we'll send them again next week. Thank you, Weed Man
• 40:49
  Speaker 3: and Lisa. There they are. Lame jokes of the week.
• 40:53
  Speaker 2: Fox Sports Radio has the best sports talk lineup in
• 40:56
  Speaker 2: the nation. Catch all of our shows at foxsportsradio.com. And
• 41:01
  Speaker 2: within the iHeartRadio app, search FSR to listen live.
• 41:05
  Speaker 3: All right, toss the coop, please. Toss the coop, toss
• 41:07
  Speaker 3: the coop, toss the coop, toss the coop. Woo-hoo-hoo! Happy Halloween!
• 41:16
  Speaker 6: Coop Scoop Entertainment starts now, and here is Justin Cooper at.
• 41:20
  Speaker 3: Our Bronco Fed on X.
• 41:22
  Speaker 2: And please beware, people. Cigarettes is definitely not good.
• 41:28
  Speaker 3: Over here. Oh, thank you for that, Marcel. A lot
• 41:31
  Speaker 3: of people chain smoke all over, so.
• 41:34
  Speaker 6: That might be the best toss I've had yet.
• 41:37
  Speaker 3: He's going to get kicked out of the projects in
• 41:39
  Speaker 3: Brooklyn if he keeps that up. All right.
• 41:42
  Speaker 6: We're going to start over in the theater, as we
• 41:45
  Speaker 6: always do here on Coop Scoop and Entertainment. A couple
• 41:47
  Speaker 6: movies that I want to point out. The first one
• 41:50
  Speaker 6: is called The Mosquito Bowl out this weekend. This one's
• 41:53
  Speaker 6: got middling reviews.
• 41:55
  Speaker 3: Is that a horror movie? It's a war movie.
• 41:58
  Speaker 6: Yes, it takes place after the attack on Pearl Harbor
• 42:01
  Speaker 6: for elite college football players put their fame aside and
• 42:05
  Speaker 6: enlist in the Marines and follows their journey and bonds
• 42:10
  Speaker 6: of brotherhood. This one stars Bill Skarsgård. And moving on,
• 42:17
  Speaker 6: a documentary out this weekend in theaters. And this one
• 42:22
  Speaker 6: I'm pretty interested in. It's got good reviews. It's called Everest,
• 42:25
  Speaker 6: The Other Side. And It follows elite ski mountaineers, Jim Morrison,
• 42:33
  Speaker 6: not that Jim Morrison, and Hillary Nelson, who fall deeply
• 42:36
  Speaker 6: in love while reaching the pinnacle of their sport. They
• 42:40
  Speaker 6: want to climb and ski the direct north face of
• 42:43
  Speaker 6: Mount Everest, the most difficult and dangerous climb on the
• 42:46
  Speaker 6: mountain and the most coveted ski line on Earth. Apparently
• 42:50
  Speaker 6: thousands have summited the southeast ridge, but only a handful
• 42:55
  Speaker 6: have ever reached the top by this route. and no
• 42:57
  Speaker 6: one has successfully skied down, and so this documentary is
• 43:01
  Speaker 6: them trying to do just that.
• 43:03
  Speaker 2: Okay.
• 43:03
  Speaker 3: Are they skied by all the bodies and all that?
• 43:07
  Speaker 6: Probably, yeah.
• 43:08
  Speaker 3: They're just there.
• 43:10
  Speaker 6: So those are the two movies in theaters. Moving on
• 43:12
  Speaker 6: to television, a couple things that I want to point out.
• 43:15
  Speaker 6: The first one is The Return of Dexter Resurrection. Yes,
• 43:20
  Speaker 6: this is the second season of the Dexter Revival series.
• 43:25
  Speaker 6: It's available right now on Paramount +. Of course, Michael C.
• 43:29
  Speaker 6: Hall stars as Dexter, and we will see Kristen Ritter,
• 43:34
  Speaker 6: Eric Stonestreet, and Uma Thurman returning for this season, as
• 43:39
  Speaker 6: well as Gabriel Luna. So it premieres today on Paramount +,
• 43:44
  Speaker 6: but the subsequent episodes will be every Sunday night at
• 43:48
  Speaker 6: 8 p.m. beginning on November 1st.
• 43:51
  Speaker 3: Are people actually going to watch Sunday night at 8 p.m.,
• 43:54
  Speaker 3: or are they just going to watch when they want to?
• 43:55
  Speaker 6: Probably when they want to.
• 43:56
  Speaker 3: That's what I do. Yeah, exactly.
• 43:59
  Speaker 6: And then last, well, actually not last, second to last,
• 44:03
  Speaker 6: we have a new series on Apple TV. It is
• 44:06
  Speaker 6: called Nocturne. and it is an adaptation of crime novels.
• 44:13
  Speaker 6: Liev Schreiber stars as a renamed protagonist, Jonah Lynn, a
• 44:17
  Speaker 6: former soldier turned homicide detective who relocates from Philadelphia in
• 44:21
  Speaker 6: search of a quieter life in a small town in
• 44:23
  Speaker 6: western Pennsylvania. But there he finds himself matching wits with
• 44:27
  Speaker 6: a serial killer played by Stephen Graham. Ooh. Yes, with
• 44:31
  Speaker 6: the help of his surrogate daughter, an FBI agent portrayed
• 44:35
  Speaker 6: by Zazie Beetz.
• 44:37
  Speaker 3: That's the name, Zazie Beetz? Yep, that is the name.
• 44:40
  Speaker 6: Bill Camp and Rory Culkin also star in this new show.
• 44:47
  Speaker 6: The first two of 10 episodes are available right now,
• 44:51
  Speaker 6: today on Apple TV. Remaining episodes arrive weekly through December 25th.
• 44:57
  Speaker 6: And now, last but not least, we have the return
• 45:02
  Speaker 6: of an Apple TV show, on Wednesday, November 4th, the
• 45:06
  Speaker 6: second season of the Golf Comedy Stick, starring Owen Wilson.
• 45:12
  Speaker 6: And this season, we'll see Rhea Sehorne join the cast
• 45:15
  Speaker 6: as well. And that is Coop Scoop Entertainment.