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How to Stop Emotional Snacking Without Willpower · FitMitTuro Fitness Podcast

• 1:11
  Hey and welcome back to fit me Turo fitness podcast today, I'm diving into something that a lot of us deal with and myself also, and that is that is emotional snacking. So that moment when you reach for the chocolate chips, or that third spin, third spoon of peanut butter, not because you are physically hungry, but because you are stressed, bored, overwhelmed, or just simply tired or done for the day. And so if you, if you have ever said, I know what to do, I just don't do it, or I just need more willpower. This episode is for you. But before diving into that episode, a quick story. I, as I, I recently, I just came back from women's women's ice hockey world championships, and it went. We had an amazing, amazing tournament, and it was, it was just so interesting for me to see that like, obviously, tournament went well. We had a great effort. We set the new record. We first becoming first women's team who won the tournament all games without getting any call against so everything went well, all team, all players, other or coaching staff, amazing, amazing job.
• 2:34
  Really proud of be part of that group and and there. But like for me, it's always like when you have a chance to travel and look little bit what how the life is in other countries, how people are behaving, what kind of what is like, how people are looking like. Of course, that is not the main thing, but it says that for me, for me, it's when you go to buy groceries and you are looking like how people are, how is the general people looking and and what they are actually buying, what kind of products like? Of course, I'm not going to look into their what, what everybody is having, but as the in general, when you are standing in a line and you are looking like that, what people are buying, and it's, it was, for me, it's really eye opening, opening experience to see like, how many people are buying different kind of like sukhari drinks, sweets, like unhealthy snacks, like chips, all that kind of stuff, and you barely not see any like vegetables or lean products.
• 3:49
  It's like a fast food and and it's, of course, it's, it's still a lot about the behavior.
• 3:53
  What is there? And then, you know, for me as a coach, if you, if you are buying those, like, I'm not saying that you can't buy those things, because I, of course, I buy those things every once in a while for myself too.
• 4:10
  But if your shopping cart is looking like that, there is like 80% stuff. It's just some fast food chips, what you want to eat. So you don't have to wonder if you have a problems like or somebody is going to in your household. Somebody is going to eat them. Otherwise, you buy them. And it's, it's just, it's just interesting to see what people are buying, what they are doing. And also, like, how is that marketing working? Like, because, for example, for us, we, like, I haven't seen here in Italy, it a lot. But like, some marketing for protein bars. For example, in England, they were big things, like, usually a protein bar. And then when I look, when I look the nutritional information, it has like bars, like which was, which were marketed as a protein part, they had seven grams of protein with over 200 calories. And that is like, I was looking like that. Okay, you can market it, but if you, you actually it's like, for me, this kind of radio is, is basically it says the candy bar with little bit more protein. What you don't find in some sneakers or or, or just some chocolate bar. So it's a candy bar for me. So it's with little bit of protein. But that is not if you think that you are eating as a source of protein.
• 5:41
  No, it's, it's not very good source of protein. You might have some other there some nuts or something. But it's, it's, those are candy bars, and you have to nowadays, like, then the marketing, what you find, if there is, you see a big time protein bar or something, look little bit nutritional information, and what is, what is behind. So, you know, it's, it's not always what you are, like, there are so many products, what you what you could be choosing instead and getting a lot more, which is not, maybe even not marketed as a high protein snack. And, of course, there are some, like, different kind of protein bars where you have 1520, grams of protein with the same amount of calories. So, but it's, of course, there's, it's not always. There's also quality, what ingredients you have in so it's kind of complicated, but then, but in general, more kind of whole foods you are buying, which are like one ingredient foods, if you have banana, you have an orange, you have a tomato, those are kind of the best things, what you could be doing and or, or if you look protein, or just one as simple as possible. But I will talk more about kind of snacks in this episode, and things what I recently have tried myself, and maybe they are some helpful tips for you, but so let's talk about what actually that emotional snacking? Boy, it actually is why it happens, and how you can stop relying on willpower and start start building a healthier, more supportive relationship with food. So what is that actually that that emotional snacking? What it what it actually is? So, emotional snacking is an eating to change how you feel, not to satisfy your physical hunger. It's a coping mechanism. So, and there is always some kind of trigger, why? What is causing that? And that usually, the most common triggers are stress, boredom, fatigue, loneliness, procrastination, or simply some habit, for example, that what my personal habit, which is now, which I'm not very proud of it, but I have been working on it.
• 8:06
  It's that I always snack after dinner when I watch Netflix, so it's more like kind of happy, happy and and I have tried myself, of course, as you will learn from later this episode, it's not about being perfect.
• 8:24
  It's just about understanding what is happening and then how to actually make some changes and improve it. So important note, this is it is normal. You are not broken, or you are not weak. Your brain is wired to seek comfort and food is it's just the fast and accessible way to do it. And if you, if you are ever looking for comfort from food, that is not the best way to do it. So in in but of course, what we actually what we want to do it, so how to actually find some different things is that you have to, first of all to understand that what is really going on, and then interrupt the automatic pattern so you have to replace it with something that actually helps in the long term. So these are, these are normal things, and now we are, we are going to go through all these kind of things, what is actually happening, why it's happening, and then automatic, that automatic pattern, like for me, for me, my own example, is that, like I said, that I always snack after dinner when I was Netflix.
• 9:40
  So this, this is kind of bad habit. Of course, I know it, that it is, it is happening. I it might be, I might struggle with, it's kind of often, I think it's more boredom, or I kind of that when you are like, if you are all day long, like, for me, my brain is going on.
• 10:04
  It's, it's thinking. You go from meeting to another meeting, you have things to do, like long days, starting from 6am and finally, like in some evenings, usually when I have group courses, I'm home at eight, 830 in the evening, and then it's like that you lay down, and you are like, now it's time to relax, or you are like, when you are not doing anything, and then you are like that, okay, what?
• 10:33
  When you are used to go all the time and function all the time, and then it's that food is there that okay? I can't just be without doing anything. So this is kind of my situation. And I said, Because I'm I'm also a person who really loves to eat.
• 10:46
  It's not I'm not picky eater. I eat basically everything, and I love food. Probably with this, these things like, I have to learn some ways how to actually find another ways, or smarter ways to do it, because otherwise, if I would snack chips or or sweets all night, I would have huge problem with my weight management and everything. So, so this is hopefully, this very case, they will help you also. So, but of course, the dream is that if I would rely on willpower.
• 11:26
  Willpower, if I tell myself that I can do it, that would maybe work for short period of time, but it would not be the long term solution. And why that willpower, actually, that method, is not going to work. So because we don't have, you don't have a willpower problem, because willpower, it's like a battery, like, it's limited and it drains quickly. So if you think that you have every single day, we have certain amount of willpower, so it's there is just amount. Like, it depends how you are using it. And if you think that your willpower, it starts from the day, like everything, like decisions, what you have to make, like, what kind of clothes in the morning, what clothes you are going to wear if you are like, it's just an example. What my wife loves to. It's her hope is, he knows it. She loves to. I think that what she can wear today and and she starts already the process day before. So it's a kind of disease, synthetic, what she and she starts doing it. It's nothing, nothing wrong.
• 12:33
  And for me, it's like, I just pick the first I have basically the same clothes all the time. I don't, I'm not. I'm not using a lot of willpower to decide what I'm going to bear today. It's on top of it, on top of my closet, what I'm wearing, and that's it.
• 12:49
  I don't look how if they are fitting together. It's just that. It's just an example. But several times in a day, it comes then for food, what you are going to eat? Are you going to do that? Are you going to go to your work? How you are going to go? If you are going to walk, if you are going to take a car, if you are going to use a public transportation, all kind of decisions, what you are going to make? Are you going to work out?
• 13:23
  I use now fitness examples, but you know, there's so many, so many decisions and where you need willpower. If you are going to say that I'm not going to take price, I'm going to take just baked potatoes or or what side you are going to take? Are you going to take a salad? Are you going to take something else? So all these kind of decisions, they are there is you have a limited amount of that willpower. And like I said, that it's it's there are several things that affect how much you have, like, it's a it's a stress. There is a disease, synthetic, maybe it's lack of sleep, and things they they make that willpower to drop fast. So if you are consistently relying on willpower, it's sign, it's a sign that your system needs an update, and not more grid.
• 14:17
  Because if you it's matter of time, like if you are using that willpower method, that I have to get myself I have to get my seat together. I have to stop doing it. You might be able to do it for certain period of time, but then, then it will be only a matter of time before you don't have you are letting it go in and you say that that's it. I'm, I'm, I have enough for this. I can't take it anymore. And then you are usually that that is the moment when people are going then that, now it doesn't matter. I ruined kind of everything already that now it doesn't matter. Or you are starting that, that thing that, okay, now it's Friday. I ruined it. Everything week is ruined.
• 14:59
  So now it's Saturday, it's at Sunday. Start over on Monday or maybe next month. And so goes.
• 15:06
  That's the that's the point that when you are relying on your willpower. So just a point that you don't need to fight harder, you just need to get curious.
• 15:21
  And this is, I tell it again, you don't need to fight harder, you need to get curious. So why these things are actually happening? So instead of asking, How do I stop myself ask, Why am I reaching for food right now?
• 15:36
  So there are three questions, and if you are listening this, you have a chance to write notes. I would write these questions down like you don't have to write them. Now, if you are driving or or somewhere, you don't have just some notes in your phone or obviously, if you have a pen and paper, but that next time when you feel the urge to emotionally snack. So number one question is that? What am I feeling right now? So name it.
• 16:07
  Is it going to be? Is it the stress? Is it sad? Are you tired? Are you anxious? Are you bored? So what, what you are feeling right now? Because that is, that is the first step to kind of keep the tire. Because most people, they don't even know what is, what is actually happening, what they are feeling, and that they don't know that it's just it might happen unconsciously, that you don't even realize that what is happening, what you are feeling, and it's just you are just that before you even realize that you have already, you have grabbed the the snack, you have been eating it, And then you realize that what just happened. So if you before hit, if you and it won't happen, you will forget sometimes, which is totally fine, but when you understand that, that this is, this is actually going on, I'm now sitting in front of I have been just eating my dinner. I'm seeing that I'm, I'm, I'm I have urged to snack. Am I bored? Am I stressed? Am I sad? Am I tired?
• 17:12
  Am I anxious? So why? What kind of feeling, and if we once you are naming it, it helps you to become more conscious, to know what is actually going on. And once you name it, and you are like, Okay, this is okay to have because it's totally normal thing, normal thing to being a human being, that you are having these kind of feelings, it says that way, how you are reacting.
• 17:38
  And that is question number one, you write it down, what you are feeling right now when it happens. And question number two is, is, what do I really need?
• 17:53
  So, do I really need a break? Do I really need a rest? Do I really need a connection? Do I need a support? So this was a, is a good example. One of my clients was in a work and he he have built a habit like it was always an afternoon, like around 330 afternoon, he was seeing that he was just automatic habit. Was just that he was walking into cafeteria, bought some snack, eat it, having a little talk with a colleague, and then returned to working working place to keep working.
• 18:33
  So there was just a sense that thing was happening, that he was every time going for a snack, and he thought that it's, it's snack, what it was a food, what he was craving. But when, they were doing like he was doing it more often. And then we realized that it was not actually the food, what he was missing. He was driving it that okay. It just actually needed a break from work and that socializing, I mean, so he went there. He replaced that habits. He was really okay. I kind of need socializing. I need a break. So it was just he got up, he walked to cafeteria, had a chat with a colleague without eating a snack, and then got back into work. And it didn't change anything. It was just that the habit of having a break, having a moment of socializing. That was what he was craving. It was not about food. But, of course, he went to cafeteria. Everybody was eating there. It was aligned. It was together that you had to eat something. But it was not actually that food, what he was craving. It was just a break and and socializing. So you would be doing like that, or is what you actually need? It might be a different what you are actually how your behavior is doing. So there might be some different needs, what we need to urge or what we need to fulfill, but it might not be food. So it's, it's and it's, it's hard to recognize what you are actually craving. So it might be totally something different than a food. But so if you now like he that one of my client, he it was, we figured out that it was not food, what he was craving.
• 20:25
  It was just a break, socializing, having a little chat with a colleague, and then returning back to work. So that was what was well needed. So it it is different, but once you start to become aware these things, what they are happening, why they are happening, that might change everything. So then question number three is that, what? What's one thing I can do instead, just for five minutes.
• 20:51
  And this is a five minute rule.
• 20:55
  It's a great example, and this is one of my favorite strategies. Is that, of course, I can tell what you need. But good way is, the simplest way is to set the timer.
• 21:13
  Phone. You can watch the clock if you have a access, but simplest way is to just take the timer for your phone for five minutes, and within during this five minutes, do something else you just it doesn't matter what you do. I will give you some examples what it could be, but it's just usually that five minutes gives you already to your brain, enough time to make smarter decision. Of course, it won't work every single time, but more often if it works even let's say that 10 out of 10 times you would snack 10 times, and now you are able to reduce it for eight times. You see there, that is a progress. It's not about being perfect. It's not about getting totally rid of it. It says to make these small improvements. So if that is helping to reduce it from 10 out of 10 to eight of them, that is a progress. So examples, what you could be doing is just step out for the fresh air. If you have a possibility going for five minutes, let the timer go down and go for outside to get some fair fresh air. You other good thing. What you could be doing within these five minutes is to do 10 deep breaths. So simply, simplest way is just to take breathe in through your nose three seconds, like 123, and let it go out through your mouth for six to nine seconds, six to 10 seconds, like really slowly, and repeat it for 10 times. And this is a great way to kind of relaxation, become where, where you are at the moment. And that's second way, of course, you can combine of these things, but just pick one, what you think that would be. So number three, the strategy is to write down your thoughts. So you could be using your notes. You could be using pen and paper, so just what you are, what is going through in your mind, what what you are thinking, if you are feeling those emotions, like was in point one or or point number two, just writing it down, naming, naming it that I'm stressed, I'm sad, I'm tired, I'm anxious, I'm bored. Whatever is going through in your mind.
• 23:51
  Number four is text to a friend, like if it's socializing, of course you could be having a call. You could go, if you have a chance to socialize, to actually talk with someone for just a couple of minutes. Those five minutes as you have that timer, so you are going to talk actually a friend. And then next strategy is just to drink big glass water and have have a pause before deciding and strategy. Next strategy is also to eat something else first. So it could be simply spray, if you have access piece of fruit, some kind of source of protein, for example. So if it's it doesn't matter which fruit, if you pray for Apple, it would be orange.
• 24:36
  It would be doesn't matter. It would be strawberries, whatever, whatever fruit like, what is, what is not, probably number one on the list, what you are craving, but eating something else first. And then, if you still feel like that, you want to have those, your chocolate cookies or whatever you are craving, then go for it, but first, you have to wait five minutes eat something else before. So those are just the simple rules, what you should be doing within those five minutes, and then making that decision again, that if you are going to have it or you are not going to have it. So I said the goal is not trying to be perfect, because only thing what you are trying to do is you are trying to build a pause between emotion and action. Because more often than not, it happens that there is no break. You don't have time even to think about it, that you get that urge to eat, and then before you even notice, you have that thing. What you are urging you want to have, it's you are already eating it. So it's just about practicing to being not perfect, but building a boss to between that action and emotion.
• 25:51
  So how then to build better habits? So here is what is helping in a long term. So number one is always, often what I see with the snacking is that eat enough during the day, so more often than not, what I see when, when we talk with my clients about these things, is that you are under eating on your main meals. So this happens like that. You know, either people often, they try to skip their breakfast, they try to eat only salad for lunch, and then later on, during the day, you feel like that. You are snacking all the time, so if you are under eating, you will have summer cavings And and those emotional triggers so. And then number two is the for how to build better habits is a build a snack ritual you actually enjoy.
• 26:50
  So you don't have to eliminate snacks, but you can change how you do them. So you are slowing down, you are played. You have played of your snacks, and you enjoy it with intention. So this is, it's a great example. What I use for myself is that, because I know that it's kind of habitual thing that i i It's it's hard to break that I don't tell myself that I can't have anything. But I set some kind of limits for myself for that snacking like, for example, for me, it's 300 calories after a dinner, and this have helped so much. So within the 300 calorie budget I have, there is an option. It's not that I can't do it. I don't rely to my repower I have, I can do it, but there is a limit for it. So and why I love this 300 calorie rule is that there is always decision. I can have my chocolate, I can have my cookies, I can have ice cream, but there is a limit that I can't have it, that there it's not going to be whole pack of chips or or sleeve of Oreos, cookies, or whatever. There is going to be limits. So and if there are days that I'm I feel like that I'm actually I might be actually hungry. So then I can have pretty good with strawberries, which is one of my favorite snacks, I could be adding scope of protein powder.
• 28:26
  If there is a like, some, even with some taste some, like, if I have some tasty protein powder, you can actually add it. You don't have to mix it with water.
• 28:38
  You can add it into your Greek.
• 28:38
  You could plain greek Greek. You could and then or adding simply some berries there. Like, what are? What are your favorite at this point? Like we have here in Italy, already, very delicious strawberries. So I they are my favorite thing. So, and I can have a lot of those things, like low fat Greek, you put 60 calories per 100 grams. So let's say that with 300 calories, I could have two 250 grams of pre cucud. I could have 250 grams of pre cucud, 500 grams of strawberries. And that, that is more or less that 300 calories.
• 29:23
  So there is a lot of volume. If I'm hungry and it's something, what, what I kind of enjoy eating. So it's not about that you can't have anything. It says that. Or then, of course, some days that I want to have, I tell to myself that I don't want that much food. There is too much now, of course, I can eat less, but also I can replace that 150 calories what I have left, I can have my two cookies or whatever.
• 29:52
  And of course, your number don't have to be 300 you would be having 400 you would be having 200 or 150 whatever number you are happy with. And this is just my example, how I try to do it myself, and maybe you can find your own way. What is, what is actually doing it and then enjoying with intention. So this is number two, how to build those better habits. And number three is practicing non food coping tools. So for example, making kind of a comfort menu of things that relax or recharge, recharge you. So it could be bubble pad, it could be walk. It could be listening news, music, doing some stretches or mobility work. So kind of things, what you are actually helping you to relax or re, recharge you without actually eating something. So and then number three is kind of is to change the environment. So if it's in front of you, you will likely eat it. If it's out of sight, you will make more mindful choices. And this is the way how I like to do it like that, if I first of all, if I know that I have at home some chocolate, I believe it, but if I don't have it at all to do it, and could be some ways what we had, what I Have, used this for my clients, that I we created truth, that you are not if you have a problem, that you know that you have something, some food like, of course, there are some people who kind of tend to say that, you know, I need to have, I have a children. They need some chocolate, so I have to have them at home. But if you have a possibility that you don't have these foods at home and that you are allowed to eat them, but the only way you can go to get them, and what you want is to go to supermarket, if you have, if it's in a walking distance, or you have to walk there, if it's like a close where you are living, go to supermarket. Buy only portion, what you will be eat right away, but you are not allowed to eat it right away. You have to bring it at home and eat that portion at home, but you have to be family box or something. It's only amount what you are going to eat right away, but that you are not eating it right after.
• 32:29
  You are bringing it home, so you are practicing that kind of habit that it's at home, it's okay to eat it at home, but there is amount what you are okay to eating with. But it's, it's kind of, it may makes that environment, it makes the decision lot harder, because more often than not, if you know that you can actually do it, but there is something else, what you have to do before it's it's more often than not you said, Ah, this is too far. I'm too lazy. I don't want to do it. And then you decide that I'm okay, actually, without it, but not kind of creating these rules that it's either yes or no or then you buy it and you have it at home, so kind of trying to change that environment and and that it's not it's not off limits. You can have it, but there is always some kind of rule what you need to do before head. So then if you you have to also give yourself praise and celebrate that awareness.
• 33:35
  Because if you are not celebrating these small wins, you will your brain will never understand. Because usually what I say is that that you are celebrating if you are able to be without snacking or without your food for a certain period of time. That is kind of all or nothing thinking. But progress isn't about never emotionally eating again, because it's all about noticing sooner, having more tools, choosing what supports you, not what sabotage is you. So celebrate every time, when you pause, when you reflect or choose something different, and if you do snack emotionally, that's okay. You don't have to.
• 34:25
  You shouldn't be any guilt, because you are human being, and that is a normal thing to have happen, and it will happen.
• 34:33
  There is, I don't know anyone who will never do it, who are who is able to stop it completely and never do it again. But just that, when you are recognizing that you are actually having one of these signs, noticing sooner, having more tools, choosing what supports you every time, when you are able to pause, reflect or choose something different, that is some time to celebrate that awareness. So these are, I hope this helps, like little, these tools were helpful. You find something. Of course, you don't need to start trying to do everything. If you pick 123, things, you have those three questions, what to ask. And here is just a little summary before we wrap up. Here is what I want you to take away from today, so you don't need more willpower.
• 35:30
  You need better tools. Awareness is the first win and practice these, the those, these three questions, and those questions were that, what am I feeling right now? What do I really need? And what's the one thing I can do instead, just for five minutes and you are setting the timer, visible timer that you are seeing that how that five minutes have passed, and then stock your toolbox with the comfort strategies that aren't just food and give yourself permission to be work in a progress. So it's not about perfection, it's about work in a progress. So if this episode help you, send it to a friend or take a screenshot and share it on your Instagram site, emotional eating is something you have been struggling with, and you are ready for support.
• 36:30
  Check out my folks coaching options at Turo on my website, personal trainer, turo.com and I will put link to show notes. If you want to check it out, you can, of course, always email me, Turo at fitme, turo.com so let's break the cycle together and beat something that actually lasts. Talk to you soon, and thank you so much for listening.
• 36:52
  You.