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Pamela, or Virtue Rewarded Volume 1 Letter 5 · The Samuel Richardson Library

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  Speaker 1: CHAPTER XXVII DEAR FATHER AND MOTHER, i am glad i
• 0:25
  Speaker 1: desired you not to meet me and john says you
• 0:28
  Speaker 1: won't for he told you he is sure i shall
• 0:31
  Speaker 1: get a passage well enough either behind some one of
• 0:34
  Speaker 1: the fellow-servants on horseback or by farmer nichols's means but
• 0:39
  Speaker 1: as to the chariot he talked to you of i
• 0:42
  Speaker 1: can't expect that favor to be sure and i should
• 0:45
  Speaker 1: not care for it because it would look so much
• 0:48
  Speaker 1: above me but farmer brady they say has a chaise
• 0:51
  Speaker 1: with one horse and we hope to borrow that or
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  Speaker 1: hire it rather than fail though money runs a little
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  Speaker 1: lowish after what i have laid out but i don't
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  Speaker 1: care to say so here though i warrant i might
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  Speaker 1: have what i would of mrs jervis or mr jonathan
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  Speaker 1: or mr longman but then how shall i pay it
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  Speaker 1: you'll say and besides i don't love to be beholden
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  Speaker 1: but the chief reason i'm glad you don't set out
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  Speaker 1: to meet me is the uncertainty for it seems i
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  Speaker 1: must stay another week still and hope certainly to go
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  Speaker 1: thursday after for poor mrs jervis will go at the
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  Speaker 1: same time she says and can't be ready before oh
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  Speaker 1: that i was once well with you though he is
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  Speaker 1: very civil too at present and not so cross as
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  Speaker 1: he was and yet he is as vexatious another way
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  Speaker 1: as you shall hear for yesterday he had a rich
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  Speaker 1: suit of clothes brought home which they call a birthday
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  Speaker 1: suit for he intends to go to london against next
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  Speaker 1: birthday to see the court and our folks will have
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  Speaker 1: it he is to be made a lord i wish
• 2:01
  Speaker 1: they may make him an honest man as he was
• 2:04
  Speaker 1: always thought but i have not found it so alas
• 2:07
  Speaker 1: for me and so as i was saying he had
• 2:11
  Speaker 1: these clothes come home and he tried them on and
• 2:15
  Speaker 1: before he pulled them off he sent for me when
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  Speaker 1: nobody else was in the parlor with him pamela said
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  Speaker 1: he you are so neat and so nice in your
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  Speaker 1: own dress alack-a-day i didn't know i was that you
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  Speaker 1: must be a judge of ours how are these clothes
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  Speaker 1: made do they fit me i am no judge said
• 2:35
  Speaker 1: i and please your honor but i think they look
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  Speaker 1: very fine his waistcoat stood on end with silver lace
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  Speaker 1: and he looked very grand but what he did last
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  Speaker 1: has made me very serious and i could make him
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  Speaker 1: no compliments said he why don't you wear your usual
• 2:54
  Speaker 1: clothes though i think everything looks well upon you for
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  Speaker 1: i still continue in my new dress i said i
• 3:02
  Speaker 1: have no clothes sir i ought to call my own
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  Speaker 1: but these and it is no matter what such an
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  Speaker 1: one as i wears said he why you look very
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  Speaker 1: serious pamela i see you can bear malice yes so
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  Speaker 1: i can sir said i according to the occasion why
• 3:22
  Speaker 1: said he your eyes always look red i think are
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  Speaker 1: you not a fool to take my last freedom so
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  Speaker 1: much to heart i am sure you and that fool
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  Speaker 1: mrs jervis frightened me by your hideous squalling as much
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  Speaker 1: as i could frighten you that is all we had
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  Speaker 1: for it said i and if you could be so
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  Speaker 1: afraid of your own servants knowing of your attempts upon
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  Speaker 1: a poor unworthy creature that is under your protection while
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  Speaker 1: i stay surely your honour ought to be more afraid
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  Speaker 1: of god almighty in whose presence we all stand in
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  Speaker 1: every action of our lives and to whom the greatest
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  Speaker 1: as well as the least must be accountable let them
• 4:01
  Speaker 1: think what they list he took my hand in a
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  Speaker 1: kind of good-humoured mockery and said well urged my pretty
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  Speaker 1: preacher when my lincolnshire chaplain dies i'll put thee on
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  Speaker 1: a gownden cassock and thou'lt make a good figure in
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  Speaker 1: his place i wish said i a little vexed at
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  Speaker 1: his jeer your honour's conscience would be your preacher and
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  Speaker 1: then you would need no other chaplain well well pamela
• 4:30
  Speaker 1: said he no more of this unfashionable jargon i did
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  Speaker 1: not send for you so much for your opinion of
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  Speaker 1: my new suit as to tell you you are welcome
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  Speaker 1: to stay since mrs jervis desires it till she goes
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  Speaker 1: i welcome said i i am sure i shall rejoice
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  Speaker 1: when i am out of the house well said he
• 4:52
  Speaker 1: you are an ungrateful baggage but i am thinking it
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  Speaker 1: would be a pity with these fair soft hands and
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  Speaker 1: that lovely skin as he called it and took hold
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  Speaker 1: of my hand that you should return again to hard
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  Speaker 1: work as you must if you go to your father's
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  Speaker 1: and so i would advise her to take a house
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  Speaker 1: in london and let lodgings to us members of parliament
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  Speaker 1: when we come to town and such a pretty daughter
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  Speaker 1: as you may pass for will always fill her house
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  Speaker 1: and she'll get a great deal of money i was
• 5:24
  Speaker 1: sadly vexed at this barbarous joke but being ready to
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  Speaker 1: cry before the tears gushed out and endeavouring to get
• 5:31
  Speaker 1: my hand from him but in vain i said i
• 5:35
  Speaker 1: can expect no better your behaviour sir to me has
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  Speaker 1: been just of a piece with these words nay i
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  Speaker 1: will say it though you were to be ever so
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  Speaker 1: angry i angry pamela no no said he i have
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  Speaker 1: overcome all that and as you are to go away
• 5:54
  Speaker 1: i look upon you now as mrs jervis's guest while
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  Speaker 1: you both stay and not as my servant and so
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  Speaker 1: you may say what you will but i'll tell you
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  Speaker 1: pamela why you need not take this matter in such
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  Speaker 1: high disdain you have a very pretty romantic turn for
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  Speaker 1: virtue and all that and i don't suppose but you'll
• 6:14
  Speaker 1: hold it still and nobody will be able to prevail
• 6:17
  Speaker 1: upon you but my child sneeringly he spoke it do
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  Speaker 1: but consider what a fine opportunity you will then have
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  Speaker 1: for a tale every day to good mother jervis and
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  Speaker 1: what subjects for letter-writing to your father and mother and
• 6:32
  Speaker 1: what pretty preachments you may hold forth to the young
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  Speaker 1: gentleman adds my heart i think it would be the
• 6:38
  Speaker 1: best thing you and she could do you do well
• 6:42
  Speaker 1: sir said i to even your wit to such a
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  Speaker 1: poor maiden as me but permit me to say that
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  Speaker 1: if you was not rich and great and i poor
• 6:52
  Speaker 1: and little you would not insult me thus let me
• 6:56
  Speaker 1: ask you sir if you think this becomes your fine
• 6:59
  Speaker 1: clothes and a master's station why so serious my pretty
• 7:03
  Speaker 1: pamela said he why so grave and would kiss me
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  Speaker 1: but my heart was full and i said let me
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  Speaker 1: alone i will tell you if you was a king
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  Speaker 1: and insulted me as you have done that you have
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  Speaker 1: forgotten to act like a gentleman and i won't stay
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  Speaker 1: to be used thus i will go to the next
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  Speaker 1: farmer's and there wait for mrs jervis if she must
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  Speaker 1: go and i'd have you know sir that i can
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  Speaker 1: stoop to the ordinariest work of your scullions for all
• 7:33
  Speaker 1: these nasty soft hands sooner than bear such ungentlemanly imputations
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  Speaker 1: i sent for you said he in high good humour
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  Speaker 1: but it is impossible to hold it with such an
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  Speaker 1: impertinent however i'll keep my temper but while i see
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  Speaker 1: you here pray don't put on those dismal grave looks
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  Speaker 1: why girl you should forbear them if it were but
• 7:56
  Speaker 1: for your pride's sake for the family will think you
• 7:59
  Speaker 1: are grieving to leave the house then sir said i
• 8:03
  Speaker 1: i will try to convince them of the contrary as
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  Speaker 1: well as your honour for i will endeavour to be
• 8:09
  Speaker 1: more cheerful while i stay for that very reason well
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  Speaker 1: replied he i will set this down by itself as
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  Speaker 1: the first time that ever what i had advised had
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  Speaker 1: any weight with you and i will add said i
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  Speaker 1: as the first advice you have given me of late
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  Speaker 1: that was fit to be followed i wish said he
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  Speaker 1: i am almost ashamed to write it impudent gentleman as
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  Speaker 1: he is i wish i had thee as quick another
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  Speaker 1: way as thou art in thy repartees and he laughed
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  Speaker 1: and i snatched my hand from him and i tripped
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  Speaker 1: away as fast as i could ah thought i married
• 8:49
  Speaker 1: i am sure it is time you were married or
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  Speaker 1: at this rate no honest maiden ought to live with
• 8:54
  Speaker 1: you why dear father and mother to be sure he
• 8:59
  Speaker 1: grows quite a rake how easy it is to go
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  Speaker 1: from bad to worse when one's people give way to
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  Speaker 1: vice how would my poor lady had she lived have
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  Speaker 1: grieved to see it but maybe he would have been
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  Speaker 1: better then though it seems he told mrs jervis he
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  Speaker 1: had an eye upon me in his mother's lifetime and
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  Speaker 1: he intended to let me know as much by the
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  Speaker 1: bye he told her here is shamelessness for you sure
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  Speaker 1: the world must be near at an end for all
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  Speaker 1: the gentlemen about are as bad as he almost as
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  Speaker 1: far as i can hear and see the fruits of
• 9:35
  Speaker 1: such bad examples their squire martin in the grove has
• 9:39
  Speaker 1: had three lyings in it seems in his house in
• 9:42
  Speaker 1: three months past one by himself and one by his
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  Speaker 1: coachman and one by his woodman and yet he has
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  Speaker 1: turned none of them away indeed how can he when
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  Speaker 1: they but follow his own vile example there is he
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  Speaker 1: and two or three more such as he within ten
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  Speaker 1: miles of us who keep company and hunt with our
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  Speaker 1: fine master truly and i suppose he is never the
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  Speaker 1: better for their examples but heaven bless me say i
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  Speaker 1: and send me out of this wicked house but dear
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  Speaker 1: father and mother what sort of creatures must the womenkind
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  Speaker 1: be do you think to give way to such wickedness
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  Speaker 1: why this it is that makes every one be thought
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  Speaker 1: of alike and alack-a-day what a world we live in
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  Speaker 1: for it is grown more a wonder that the men
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  Speaker 1: are resisted than that the women comply this i suppose
• 10:36
  Speaker 1: makes me such a sauce-box and boldface and a creature
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  Speaker 1: and all because i won't be a sauce-box and boldface
• 10:43
  Speaker 1: indeed but i am sorry for these things one don't
• 10:47
  Speaker 1: know what arts and stratagems men may devise to gain
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  Speaker 1: their vile ends and so i will think as well
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  Speaker 1: as i can of these poor undone creatures and pity
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  Speaker 1: them for you see by my sad story and narrow
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  Speaker 1: escapes what hardships poor maidens go through whose lot it
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  Speaker 1: is to go out to service especially to houses where
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  Speaker 1: there is not the fear of god and good rule
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  Speaker 1: kept by the heads of the family you see i
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  Speaker 1: am quite grown grave and serious indeed it becomes the
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  Speaker 1: present condition of your dutiful daughter letter twenty eight dear
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  Speaker 1: father and mother john says you wept when you read
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  Speaker 1: my last letter that he carried i am sorry you
• 11:31
  Speaker 1: let him see that for they all mistrust already how
• 11:34
  Speaker 1: matters are and it is no credit that i have
• 11:37
  Speaker 1: been attempted though it is that i have resisted yet
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  Speaker 1: i am sorry they have cause to think so evil
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  Speaker 1: of my master from any of us mrs jervis has
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  Speaker 1: made up her accounts with mr longman and will stay
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  Speaker 1: in her place i am glad of it for her
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  Speaker 1: own sake and for my master's for she has a
• 11:57
  Speaker 1: good master of him so indeed all have but poor
• 12:01
  Speaker 1: me and he has a good housekeeper in her mr
• 12:05
  Speaker 1: longman it seems took upon him to talk to my
• 12:08
  Speaker 1: master how faithful and careful of his interests she was
• 12:13
  Speaker 1: and how exact in her accounts and he told him
• 12:16
  Speaker 1: there was no comparison between her accounts and mrs jukes's
• 12:20
  Speaker 1: at the lincolnshire estate he said so many fine things
• 12:24
  Speaker 1: it seems of mrs jervis that my master sent for
• 12:28
  Speaker 1: her in mr longman's presence and said pamela might come
• 12:31
  Speaker 1: along with her i suppose to mortify me that i
• 12:35
  Speaker 1: must go while she has to stay but as when
• 12:38
  Speaker 1: i go away i am not to go with her
• 12:41
  Speaker 1: nor was she to go with me so i did
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  Speaker 1: not matter it much only it would have been creditable
• 12:47
  Speaker 1: to such a poor girl that the housekeeper would bear
• 12:50
  Speaker 1: me company if i went said he to her well
• 12:54
  Speaker 1: mrs jervis longman says you have made up your accounts
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  Speaker 1: with him with your usual fidelity and exactness i had
• 13:01
  Speaker 1: a good mind to make you an offer of continuing
• 13:04
  Speaker 1: with me if you can be a little sorry for
• 13:06
  Speaker 1: your hasty words which indeed were not so respectful as
• 13:10
  Speaker 1: i have deserved at your hands she seemed at a
• 13:13
  Speaker 1: sad loss what to say because mr longman was there
• 13:17
  Speaker 1: and she could not speak of the occasion of those
• 13:19
  Speaker 1: words which was me indeed said mr longman i must
• 13:25
  Speaker 1: needs say before your face that since i have known
• 13:28
  Speaker 1: my master's family i have never found such good management
• 13:31
  Speaker 1: in it nor so much love and harmony neither i
• 13:35
  Speaker 1: wish the lincolnshire estate was as well served no more
• 13:39
  Speaker 1: of that said my master but mrs jervis may stay
• 13:43
  Speaker 1: if she will and here mrs jervis pray accept of
• 13:47
  Speaker 1: this which at the close of every year's accounts i
• 13:50
  Speaker 1: will present you with besides your salary as long as
• 13:53
  Speaker 1: i find your care so useful and agreeable and he
• 13:57
  Speaker 1: gave her five guineas she made him a low curtsey
• 14:00
  Speaker 1: and thanking him looked to me as if she would
• 14:03
  Speaker 1: have spoken to me he took her meaning i believe
• 14:07
  Speaker 1: for he said indeed i love to encourage merit and
• 14:11
  Speaker 1: obligingness long man but i can never be equally kind
• 14:15
  Speaker 1: to those who don't deserve it at my hands as
• 14:17
  Speaker 1: to those who do and then he looked full on
• 14:21
  Speaker 1: me long man continued he i said that girl might
• 14:25
  Speaker 1: come in with mrs jervis because they love to be
• 14:28
  Speaker 1: always together for mrs jervis is very good to her
• 14:32
  Speaker 1: and loves her as well as if she was her
• 14:34
  Speaker 1: daughter but else mr long man interrupting him said good
• 14:39
  Speaker 1: to mrs pamela ay sir and so she is to
• 14:42
  Speaker 1: be sure but everybody must be good to her for
• 14:46
  Speaker 1: he was going on but my master said no more
• 14:50
  Speaker 1: no more mr longman i see old men are taken
• 14:53
  Speaker 1: with pretty young girls as well as other folks and
• 14:56
  Speaker 1: fair looks hide many a fault where a person has
• 15:00
  Speaker 1: the art to behave obligingly why and please your honor
• 15:04
  Speaker 1: said mr longman everybody and was going on i believe
• 15:08
  Speaker 1: to say something more in my praise but he interrupted
• 15:12
  Speaker 1: him and said not a word more of this pamela
• 15:15
  Speaker 1: i can't let her stay i'll assure you not only
• 15:19
  Speaker 1: for her own freedom of speech but her letter-writing of
• 15:22
  Speaker 1: all the secrets of my family ay said the good
• 15:26
  Speaker 1: old man i am sorry for that too but sir
• 15:30
  Speaker 1: no more i say said my master for my reputation
• 15:34
  Speaker 1: is so well known mighty fine thought i that i
• 15:38
  Speaker 1: care not what anybody writes or says of me but
• 15:41
  Speaker 1: to tell you the truth not that it need go
• 15:44
  Speaker 1: further i think of changing my condition soon and you
• 15:47
  Speaker 1: know young ladies of birth and fortune will choose their
• 15:50
  Speaker 1: own servants and that's my chief reason why pamela can't
• 15:54
  Speaker 1: stay as for the rest said he the girl is
• 15:58
  Speaker 1: a good sort of body take her altogether though i
• 16:01
  Speaker 1: must needs say a little pert since my mother's death
• 16:05
  Speaker 1: in her answers and gives me two words for one
• 16:08
  Speaker 1: which i can't bear nor is there reason i should
• 16:12
  Speaker 1: you know long man no to be sure sir said
• 16:15
  Speaker 1: he but tis strange methinks she should be so mild
• 16:19
  Speaker 1: and meek to every one of us in the house
• 16:22
  Speaker 1: and forget herself so where she should show most respect
• 16:26
  Speaker 1: very true mr longman said he but so it is
• 16:30
  Speaker 1: i'll assure you and it was from her pertness that
• 16:33
  Speaker 1: mrs jervis and i had the words and i should
• 16:36
  Speaker 1: mind it the less but that the girl there she
• 16:39
  Speaker 1: stands i say it to her face has wit and
• 16:42
  Speaker 1: sense above her years and knows better i was in
• 16:46
  Speaker 1: great pain to say something but yet i knew not
• 16:49
  Speaker 1: what before mr longman and mrs jervis looked at me
• 16:53
  Speaker 1: and walked to the window to hide her concern for
• 16:56
  Speaker 1: me at last i said it is for you sir
• 17:00
  Speaker 1: to say what you please and for me only to
• 17:03
  Speaker 1: say god bless your honour poor mr longman faltered in
• 17:07
  Speaker 1: his speech and was ready to cry said my insulting
• 17:11
  Speaker 1: master to me why prithee pamela now show thyself as
• 17:15
  Speaker 1: thou art before longman canst not give him a specimen
• 17:20
  Speaker 1: of that pertness which thou hast exercised upon me sometimes
• 17:24
  Speaker 1: did he not my dear father and mother deserve all
• 17:27
  Speaker 1: the truth to be told yet i overcame myself so
• 17:31
  Speaker 1: far as to say well your honour may play upon
• 17:34
  Speaker 1: a poor girl that you know can answer you but
• 17:37
  Speaker 1: dare not why prithee now insinuator said he say the
• 17:43
  Speaker 1: worst you can before longman and mrs jervis i challenge
• 17:46
  Speaker 1: the utmost of thy impertinence and as thou are going
• 17:50
  Speaker 1: away and have the love of every body i would
• 17:53
  Speaker 1: be a little justified to my family that you have
• 17:56
  Speaker 1: no reason to complain of hardships from me as i
• 17:59
  Speaker 1: have pert saucy answers from you besides exposing me by
• 18:03
  Speaker 1: your letters surely sir said i i am of no
• 18:08
  Speaker 1: consequence equal to this in your honour's family that such
• 18:11
  Speaker 1: a great gentleman as you should need justify yourself about
• 18:15
  Speaker 1: me i am glad mrs jervis stays with your honour
• 18:19
  Speaker 1: and i know i have not deserved to stay and
• 18:22
  Speaker 1: more than that i don't desire to stay adds bobbers
• 18:27
  Speaker 1: said mr longman and ran to me don't say so
• 18:30
  Speaker 1: don't say so dear miss pamela we all love you
• 18:33
  Speaker 1: dearly and pray down of your knees and ask his
• 18:37
  Speaker 1: honour pardon and we will all become pleaders in a
• 18:40
  Speaker 1: body and i and mrs jervis too at the head
• 18:43
  Speaker 1: of it to beg his honour's pardon and to continue
• 18:46
  Speaker 1: you at least till his honour marries no mr longman
• 18:51
  Speaker 1: said i i cannot ask nor will i stay if
• 18:54
  Speaker 1: i might all i desire is to return to my
• 18:58
  Speaker 1: poor father and mother and though i love you all
• 19:01
  Speaker 1: i won't stay oh well-a-day well-a-day said the good old
• 19:06
  Speaker 1: man i did not expect this when i had got
• 19:09
  Speaker 1: matters thus far and had made all up for mrs
• 19:12
  Speaker 1: jervis i was in hopes to have got a double
• 19:15
  Speaker 1: holiday of joy for all the family in your pardon
• 19:18
  Speaker 1: too well said my master this is a little specimen
• 19:23
  Speaker 1: of what i told you long man you see there
• 19:25
  Speaker 1: is a spirit you did not expect mrs jervis told
• 19:29
  Speaker 1: me after that she could stay no longer to hear
• 19:32
  Speaker 1: me so hardly used and must have spoken had she
• 19:36
  Speaker 1: stayed what would never have been forgiven her so she
• 19:39
  Speaker 1: went out i looked after her to go too but
• 19:43
  Speaker 1: my master said come pamela give another specimen i desire
• 19:47
  Speaker 1: you to long men i am sure you must if
• 19:50
  Speaker 1: you will but speak well sir said i since it
• 19:55
  Speaker 1: seems your greatness wants to be justified by my lowness
• 19:58
  Speaker 1: and i have no desire you should suffer in the
• 20:01
  Speaker 1: sight of your family i will say on my bended
• 20:03
  Speaker 1: knees and so i kneel down that i have been
• 20:07
  Speaker 1: a very faulty and a very ungrateful creature to the
• 20:10
  Speaker 1: best of masters i have been very perverse and saucy
• 20:14
  Speaker 1: and have deserved nothing at your hands but to be
• 20:16
  Speaker 1: turned out of your family with shame and disgrace i
• 20:20
  Speaker 1: therefore have nothing to say for myself but that i
• 20:23
  Speaker 1: am not worthy to stay and so cannot wish to
• 20:26
  Speaker 1: stay and will not stay and so god almighty bless
• 20:30
  Speaker 1: you and mr longman and good mrs jervis and every
• 20:33
  Speaker 1: living soul of the family and i will pray for
• 20:36
  Speaker 1: you as long as i live and so i rose
• 20:40
  Speaker 1: up and was forced to lean upon my master's elbow-chair
• 20:43
  Speaker 1: or i should have sunk down the poor old man
• 20:47
  Speaker 1: wept more than i and said adds bobbers was ever
• 20:50
  Speaker 1: the like heard tis too much too much i can't
• 20:54
  Speaker 1: bear it as i hope to live i am quite
• 20:57
  Speaker 1: melted dear sir forgive her the poor thing prays for
• 21:01
  Speaker 1: you she prays for us all she owns her fault
• 21:05
  Speaker 1: yet won't be forgiven i profess i know not what
• 21:08
  Speaker 1: to make of it my master himself hardened wretch as
• 21:12
  Speaker 1: he was seemed a little moved and took his handkerchief
• 21:16
  Speaker 1: out of his pocket and walked to the window what
• 21:20
  Speaker 1: sort of a day is it said he and then
• 21:24
  Speaker 1: getting a little more hard-heartedness he said well you may
• 21:27
  Speaker 1: be gone from my presence thou strange medley of inconsistence
• 21:31
  Speaker 1: but thou shan't stay after your time in the house
• 21:35
  Speaker 1: nay pray sir pray sir said the old man relent
• 21:39
  Speaker 1: a little adds hardikins you young gentlemen are made of
• 21:44
  Speaker 1: iron and steel i think i'm sure said he my
• 21:48
  Speaker 1: heart's turned into butter and is running away at my
• 21:51
  Speaker 1: eyes i never felt the like before said my master
• 21:55
  Speaker 1: with an imperious tone get out of my presence hussy
• 21:59
  Speaker 1: i can't bear you in my sight sir said i
• 22:03
  Speaker 1: i'm going as fast as i can but indeed my
• 22:07
  Speaker 1: dear father and mother my head was so giddy and
• 22:10
  Speaker 1: my limbs trembled so that i was forced to go
• 22:13
  Speaker 1: holding by the wainscot all the way with both my
• 22:16
  Speaker 1: hands and thought i should not have got to the
• 22:18
  Speaker 1: door but when i did as i hoped this would
• 22:21
  Speaker 1: be my last interview with this terrible hard-hearted master i
• 22:25
  Speaker 1: turned about and made a low curtsey and said god
• 22:28
  Speaker 1: bless you sir god bless you mr longman and i
• 22:32
  Speaker 1: went into the lobby leading to the great hall and
• 22:35
  Speaker 1: dropped into the first chair for i could get no
• 22:37
  Speaker 1: farther a good while i leave all these things to
• 22:41
  Speaker 1: your reflection my dear parents but i can write no
• 22:44
  Speaker 1: more my poor heart's almost broken indeed it is oh
• 22:49
  Speaker 1: when shall i get away send me good god and
• 22:53
  Speaker 1: safety once more to my poor father's peaceful cot and
• 22:57
  Speaker 1: there the worst that can happen will be joy and
• 22:59
  Speaker 1: perfection to what i now bear oh pity your distressed
• 23:04
  Speaker 1: daughter letter twenty nine my dear father and mother i
• 23:09
  Speaker 1: must ride on though i shall come so soon for
• 23:13
  Speaker 1: now i have hardly anything else to do i have
• 23:16
  Speaker 1: finished all that lay upon me and only wait the
• 23:18
  Speaker 1: good time of setting out mrs jervis said i must
• 23:22
  Speaker 1: be low in pocket for what i had laid out
• 23:25
  Speaker 1: and so would have presented me with two guineas of
• 23:28
  Speaker 1: her five but i could not take them of her
• 23:31
  Speaker 1: because poor gentlewoman she pays old debts for her children
• 23:35
  Speaker 1: that were extravagant and wants them herself this though was
• 23:39
  Speaker 1: very good in her i am sorry i shall have
• 23:43
  Speaker 1: but little to bring with me but i know you
• 23:45
  Speaker 1: won't you are so good and i will work the
• 23:48
  Speaker 1: harder when i come home if i can get a
• 23:51
  Speaker 1: little plain work or anything to do but all your
• 23:54
  Speaker 1: neighbourhood is so poor that i fear i shall want
• 23:57
  Speaker 1: work except maybe dame mumford can help me to something
• 24:02
  Speaker 1: from any good family she is acquainted with here what
• 24:06
  Speaker 1: a sad thing it is i have been brought up
• 24:09
  Speaker 1: wrong as matters stand for you know my good lady
• 24:13
  Speaker 1: now in heaven loved singing and dancing and as she
• 24:16
  Speaker 1: would have it i had a voice she made me
• 24:19
  Speaker 1: learn both and often and often has she made me
• 24:22
  Speaker 1: sing her an innocent song and a good psalm too
• 24:26
  Speaker 1: and dance before her and i must learn to flower
• 24:29
  Speaker 1: and draw too and to work fine work with my
• 24:32
  Speaker 1: needle why all this too i have got pretty tolerably
• 24:36
  Speaker 1: at my finger's end as they say and she used
• 24:39
  Speaker 1: to praise me and was a good judge of such
• 24:41
  Speaker 1: matters well now what is all this to the purpose
• 24:45
  Speaker 1: as things have turned out why no more or less
• 24:49
  Speaker 1: but that i am like the grasshopper in the fable
• 24:52
  Speaker 1: which i have read of in my lady's book as
• 24:54
  Speaker 1: follows see the sop's fables which have lately been selected
• 25:00
  Speaker 1: and reformed from those of sir r lestrange and the
• 25:03
  Speaker 1: most eminent mythologists as the ants were airing their provisions
• 25:09
  Speaker 1: one winter a hungry grasshopper as suppose it was poor
• 25:13
  Speaker 1: i begged a charity of them they told him that
• 25:17
  Speaker 1: he should have wrought in summer if he would not
• 25:19
  Speaker 1: have wanted in winter well says the grasshopper but i
• 25:24
  Speaker 1: was not idle neither for i sung out the whole
• 25:27
  Speaker 1: season nay then said they you'll even do well to
• 25:31
  Speaker 1: make a merry year of it and dance in winter
• 25:34
  Speaker 1: to the time you sung in summer so i shall
• 25:37
  Speaker 1: make a fine figure with my singing and my dancing
• 25:41
  Speaker 1: when i come home to you nay i shall be
• 25:43
  Speaker 1: unfit even for a may-day holiday time for these minuets
• 25:48
  Speaker 1: brigadoons and french dances that i have been practising will
• 25:52
  Speaker 1: make me but ill company for my milkmaid companions that
• 25:55
  Speaker 1: are to be to be sure i had better as
• 25:58
  Speaker 1: things stand have learned to wash and scour and brew
• 26:02
  Speaker 1: and bake and such like but i hope if i
• 26:05
  Speaker 1: can't get work and can meet with a place to
• 26:08
  Speaker 1: learn these soon if anybody will have the goodness to
• 26:11
  Speaker 1: bear with me till i am able for notwithstanding what
• 26:15
  Speaker 1: my master says i hope i have an humble and
• 26:18
  Speaker 1: teachable mind and next to god's grace that's all my
• 26:22
  Speaker 1: comfort for i shall think nothing too mean that is
• 26:25
  Speaker 1: honest it may be a little hard at first but
• 26:29
  Speaker 1: woe to my proud heart if i find it so
• 26:31
  Speaker 1: on trial for i will make it bent to its
• 26:34
  Speaker 1: condition or break it i have read of a good
• 26:38
  Speaker 1: bishop that was to be burnt for his religion and
• 26:41
  Speaker 1: he tried how he could bear it by putting his
• 26:43
  Speaker 1: fingers into the lighted candle so i t'other day tried
• 26:48
  Speaker 1: when rachel's back was turned if i could not scour
• 26:51
  Speaker 1: a pewter plate she had begun i see i could
• 26:54
  Speaker 1: do it by degrees it only blistered my hand in
• 26:57
  Speaker 1: two places all the matter is if i could get
• 27:01
  Speaker 1: plain work enough i need not spoil my fingers but
• 27:05
  Speaker 1: if i can't i hope to make my hands as
• 27:08
  Speaker 1: red as a blood-pudding and as hard as a beechen
• 27:11
  Speaker 1: trencher to accommodate them to my condition but i must
• 27:15
  Speaker 1: break off here's somebody coming tis only our hannah with
• 27:19
  Speaker 1: a message from mrs jervis but hold here's somebody else
• 27:24
  Speaker 1: well it is only rachel i am as much frightened
• 27:27
  Speaker 1: as were the city mouse and the country mouse in
• 27:30
  Speaker 1: the same book of fables at every thing that stirs
• 27:34
  Speaker 1: oh i have a power of these things to entertain
• 27:36
  Speaker 1: you with in winter evenings when i come home if
• 27:40
  Speaker 1: i can but get work with a little time for
• 27:42
  Speaker 1: reading i hope we shall be very happy over our
• 27:45
  Speaker 1: peat fires what made me hint to you that i
• 27:49
  Speaker 1: should bring but little with me is this you must
• 27:52
  Speaker 1: know i did intend to do as i have this
• 27:55
  Speaker 1: afternoon and that is i took all my clothes and
• 27:58
  Speaker 1: all my linen and i divided them into three parcels
• 28:02
  Speaker 1: as i had before told mrs jervis i intended to
• 28:05
  Speaker 1: do and i said it is now monday mrs jervis
• 28:09
  Speaker 1: and i am to go away on thursday morning betimes
• 28:13
  Speaker 1: so though i know you don't doubt my honesty i
• 28:16
  Speaker 1: beg you will look over my poor matters and let
• 28:19
  Speaker 1: every one have what belongs to them for said i
• 28:23
  Speaker 1: you know i am resolved to take with me only
• 28:25
  Speaker 1: what i can properly call my own said she i
• 28:29
  Speaker 1: did not know her drift then to be sure she
• 28:32
  Speaker 1: meant well but i did not thank her for it
• 28:34
  Speaker 1: when i did know it let your things be brought
• 28:37
  Speaker 1: down in the green room and i will do anything
• 28:40
  Speaker 1: you will have me do with all my heart said
• 28:43
  Speaker 1: i green room or anywhere but i think you might
• 28:47
  Speaker 1: step up and see em as they lie however i
• 28:50
  Speaker 1: fetched em down and laid them in three parcels as
• 28:53
  Speaker 1: before and when i had done i went down to
• 28:56
  Speaker 1: call her up to look at them now it seems
• 29:00
  Speaker 1: she had prepared my master for this scene unknown to
• 29:03
  Speaker 1: me and in this green room was a closet with
• 29:06
  Speaker 1: a sash-door and a curtain before it for there she
• 29:09
  Speaker 1: puts her sweetmeats and such things and she did it
• 29:13
  Speaker 1: it seems to turn his heart as knowing what i
• 29:16
  Speaker 1: intended i supposed that he should make me take the
• 29:19
  Speaker 1: things for if he had i should have made money
• 29:22
  Speaker 1: of them to help us when we got together for
• 29:25
  Speaker 1: to be sure i could never have appeared in them
• 29:29
  Speaker 1: well as i was saying he had got unknown to
• 29:32
  Speaker 1: me into this closet i suppose while i went to
• 29:35
  Speaker 1: call mrs jervis and since she owned to me it
• 29:39
  Speaker 1: was at his desire when she told him something of
• 29:41
  Speaker 1: what i intended or else would not have done it
• 29:45
  Speaker 1: though i have reason i am sure to remember the
• 29:47
  Speaker 1: last closet work so i said when she came up
• 29:52
  Speaker 1: here mrs jervis is the first parcel i will spread
• 29:55
  Speaker 1: it all abroad these are the things my good lady
• 29:58
  Speaker 1: gave me in the first place said i and so
• 30:01
  Speaker 1: i went on describing the clothes and linen my lady
• 30:04
  Speaker 1: had given me mingling blessings as i proceeded for her
• 30:08
  Speaker 1: goodness to me and when i had turned over that
• 30:10
  Speaker 1: parcel i said well so much for the first parcel
• 30:14
  Speaker 1: mrs jervis that was my lady's gifts now i come
• 30:19
  Speaker 1: to the presence of my dear virtuous master hey you
• 30:22
  Speaker 1: no closet for that mrs jervis she laughed and said
• 30:27
  Speaker 1: i never saw such a comical girl in my life
• 30:30
  Speaker 1: but go on i will mrs jervis said i as
• 30:34
  Speaker 1: soon as i have opened the bundle for i was
• 30:36
  Speaker 1: as brisk and as pert as could be little thinking
• 30:39
  Speaker 1: who heard me now here mrs jervis said i are
• 30:44
  Speaker 1: my ever worthy master's presents and then i particularized all
• 30:48
  Speaker 1: those in the second bundle after which i turned to
• 30:51
  Speaker 1: my own and said now mrs jervis comes poor pamela's
• 30:55
  Speaker 1: bundle and a little one it is to the others
• 30:59
  Speaker 1: first here is a calico night-gown that i used to
• 31:01
  Speaker 1: wear a morning's twill be rather too good for me
• 31:04
  Speaker 1: when i get home but i must have something then
• 31:08
  Speaker 1: there is a quilted calimenco coat and a pair of
• 31:11
  Speaker 1: stockings i bought of the pedlar and my straw hat
• 31:14
  Speaker 1: with blue strings and a remnant of scott's cloth which
• 31:17
  Speaker 1: will make two shirts and two shifts the same i
• 31:20
  Speaker 1: have on for my poor father and mother and here
• 31:24
  Speaker 1: are four other shifts one the fellow to that i
• 31:26
  Speaker 1: have on another pretty good one and the other two
• 31:30
  Speaker 1: old fine ones that will serve me to turn and
• 31:33
  Speaker 1: wind with at home for they are not worth leaving
• 31:35
  Speaker 1: behind me and here are two pairs of shoes i
• 31:39
  Speaker 1: have taken the lace off which i will burn and
• 31:42
  Speaker 1: maybe will fetch me some little matter at a pinch
• 31:45
  Speaker 1: with an old silver buckle or two what do you
• 31:48
  Speaker 1: laugh for mrs jervis said i why you are like
• 31:52
  Speaker 1: an april day you cry and laugh in a breath
• 31:55
  Speaker 1: well let me see ay here is a cotton handkerchief
• 31:59
  Speaker 1: i bought of the peddler there should be another somewhere
• 32:02
  Speaker 1: oh here it is and here too are my new-bought
• 32:05
  Speaker 1: knit mittens and this is my new flannel coat the
• 32:09
  Speaker 1: fellow to that i have on and in this parcel
• 32:12
  Speaker 1: pinned together are several pieces of printed calico remnants of
• 32:16
  Speaker 1: silks and such like that if good luck should happen
• 32:20
  Speaker 1: and i should get work would serve for robins and
• 32:22
  Speaker 1: facings and such like uses and here too are a
• 32:27
  Speaker 1: pair of pockets they are too fine for me but
• 32:30
  Speaker 1: i have no worse bless me said i i did
• 32:33
  Speaker 1: not think i had so many good things well mrs
• 32:37
  Speaker 1: jervis said i you have seen all my store and
• 32:41
  Speaker 1: i will now sit down and tell you a piece
• 32:43
  Speaker 1: of my mind be brief then said she my good
• 32:47
  Speaker 1: girl for she was afraid she said afterwards that i
• 32:51
  Speaker 1: would say too much why then the case is this
• 32:56
  Speaker 1: i am to enter upon a point of equity and
• 32:58
  Speaker 1: conscience mrs jervis and i must beg if you love
• 33:01
  Speaker 1: me you'd let me have my own way those things
• 33:05
  Speaker 1: there of my ladies i can have no claim to
• 33:08
  Speaker 1: so as to take them away for she gave them
• 33:11
  Speaker 1: me supposing i was to wear them in her service
• 33:14
  Speaker 1: and to do credit to her bountiful heart but since
• 33:17
  Speaker 1: i am to be turned away you know i cannot
• 33:20
  Speaker 1: wear them at my poor father's for i should bring
• 33:23
  Speaker 1: all the little village upon my back and so i
• 33:25
  Speaker 1: resolve not to have them then mrs jervis said i
• 33:30
  Speaker 1: i have far less right to these of my worthy
• 33:33
  Speaker 1: masters for you see what was his intention in giving
• 33:37
  Speaker 1: them to me so they were to be the price
• 33:39
  Speaker 1: of my shame and if i could make use of
• 33:41
  Speaker 1: them i should think i should never prosper with them
• 33:45
  Speaker 1: and besides you know mrs jervis if i could not
• 33:48
  Speaker 1: do the good gentleman's work why should i take his
• 33:51
  Speaker 1: wages so in conscience in honour in everything i have
• 33:56
  Speaker 1: nothing to say to thee thou second wicked bundle but
• 34:00
  Speaker 1: said i come to my arms my dear third parcel
• 34:04
  Speaker 1: the companion of my poverty and the witness of my
• 34:07
  Speaker 1: honesty and may i never deserve the least rag that
• 34:11
  Speaker 1: is contained in thee when i forfeit a title to
• 34:13
  Speaker 1: that innocence that i hope will ever be the pride
• 34:16
  Speaker 1: of my life and then i am sure it will
• 34:19
  Speaker 1: be my highest comfort at my death when all the
• 34:22
  Speaker 1: riches and pomps of the world will be worse than
• 34:24
  Speaker 1: the vilest rags that can be worn by beggars and
• 34:28
  Speaker 1: so i hugged my third bundle but said i mrs
• 34:33
  Speaker 1: jervis and she wept to hear me one thing more
• 34:36
  Speaker 1: i have to trouble you with and that's all there
• 34:39
  Speaker 1: are four guineas you know that came out of my
• 34:42
  Speaker 1: good lady's pocket when she died that was some silver
• 34:45
  Speaker 1: my master gave me now these same four guineas i
• 34:49
  Speaker 1: sent to my poor father and mother and they have
• 34:52
  Speaker 1: broken them but would take them up if i could
• 34:55
  Speaker 1: and if you think it should be so it shall
• 34:58
  Speaker 1: but pray tell me honestly your mind as to the
• 35:01
  Speaker 1: three years before my lady's death do you think as
• 35:04
  Speaker 1: i had no wages i may be supposed to be
• 35:07
  Speaker 1: quits by quits i cannot mean that my poor services
• 35:11
  Speaker 1: should be equal to my lady's goodness for that's impossible
• 35:15
  Speaker 1: but as all her learning and education of me as
• 35:18
  Speaker 1: matters have turned will be of little service to me
• 35:21
  Speaker 1: now for it had been better for me to have
• 35:23
  Speaker 1: been brought up to hard labour to be sure for
• 35:26
  Speaker 1: that i must turn to at last if i can't
• 35:28
  Speaker 1: get a place and you know in places too one
• 35:32
  Speaker 1: is subject to such temptations as are dreadful to think
• 35:36
  Speaker 1: of so i say by quits i only mean as
• 35:39
  Speaker 1: i return all the good things she gave me whether
• 35:42
  Speaker 1: i may not set my little services against my keeping
• 35:46
  Speaker 1: because as i said my learning is not now in
• 35:49
  Speaker 1: the question and i am sure my dear good lady
• 35:52
  Speaker 1: would have thought so had she lived but that too
• 35:55
  Speaker 1: is now out of the question well then if so
• 35:58
  Speaker 1: i would ask whether in above this year that i
• 36:02
  Speaker 1: have lived with my master as i am resolved to
• 36:04
  Speaker 1: leave all his gifts behind me i may not have
• 36:08
  Speaker 1: earned besides my keeping these four guineas and these poor
• 36:11
  Speaker 1: clothes here upon my back and in my third bundle
• 36:15
  Speaker 1: now tell me your mind freely without favour or affection
• 36:20
  Speaker 1: alas my dear girl says she you make me unable
• 36:24
  Speaker 1: to speak to you at all to be sure it
• 36:26
  Speaker 1: will be the highest affront that can be offered for
• 36:29
  Speaker 1: you to leave any of these things behind you and
• 36:32
  Speaker 1: you must take all your bundles with you or my
• 36:35
  Speaker 1: master will never forgive you well well mrs jervis said
• 36:40
  Speaker 1: i i don't care i have been too much used
• 36:43
  Speaker 1: to be snubbed and hardly treated by my master of
• 36:45
  Speaker 1: late i have done him no harm and i shall
• 36:49
  Speaker 1: always pray for him and wish him happy but i
• 36:52
  Speaker 1: don't deserve these things i know i don't then i
• 36:56
  Speaker 1: can't wear them if i should take them so they
• 36:59
  Speaker 1: can be of no use to me and i trust
• 37:01
  Speaker 1: i shall not want the poor pittance that is all
• 37:04
  Speaker 1: i desire to keep life and soul together bread and
• 37:08
  Speaker 1: water i can live upon mrs jervis with content water
• 37:12
  Speaker 1: i shall get any where and if i can't get
• 37:14
  Speaker 1: me bread i will live like a bird in winter
• 37:17
  Speaker 1: upon hips and haws and at other times upon pig-nuts
• 37:21
  Speaker 1: and potatoes or turnips or any thing so what occasion
• 37:25
  Speaker 1: have i for these things but all i ask is
• 37:28
  Speaker 1: about these four guineas and if you think i need
• 37:31
  Speaker 1: not return them that is all i want to know'
• 37:35
  Speaker 1: To be sure, my dear, you need not,' said she.'
• 37:38
  Speaker 1: You have well earned them by that waistcoat only.'' No,
• 37:43
  Speaker 1: I think not so in that only, but in the
• 37:45
  Speaker 1: linen and other things, do you think I have?'' Yes, yes,'
• 37:50
  Speaker 1: said she,' and more.'' And my keeping allowed for, I mean,'
• 37:55
  Speaker 1: said I,' and these poor clothes on my back besides?
• 37:59
  Speaker 1: Remember that, Mrs. Jervis?' yes my dear odd one no
• 38:03
  Speaker 1: doubt you have well then said i i am as
• 38:07
  Speaker 1: happy as a princess i am quite as rich as
• 38:10
  Speaker 1: i wish to be and once more my dear third
• 38:14
  Speaker 1: bundle i will hug thee to my bosom and i
• 38:17
  Speaker 1: beg you'll say nothing of all this till i am
• 38:19
  Speaker 1: gone that my master mayn't be so angry but that
• 38:23
  Speaker 1: i may go in peace for my heart without other
• 38:26
  Speaker 1: matters will be ready to break to part with you
• 38:29
  Speaker 1: all now mrs jervis said i as to one matter
• 38:34
  Speaker 1: more and that is my master's last usage of me
• 38:37
  Speaker 1: before mr longman said she prithee dear pamela step up
• 38:42
  Speaker 1: to my chamber and fetch me a paper i left
• 38:44
  Speaker 1: on my table i have something to show you in
• 38:47
  Speaker 1: it i will said i and stepped down but it
• 38:52
  Speaker 1: was only a fetch to take the orders of my
• 38:54
  Speaker 1: master i found it seems he said he thought two
• 38:58
  Speaker 1: or three times to have burst out upon me but
• 39:01
  Speaker 1: he could not stand it and wished i might not
• 39:04
  Speaker 1: know he was there but i tripped up again so
• 39:07
  Speaker 1: nimbly for there was no paper that i just saw
• 39:10
  Speaker 1: his back as if coming out of that green room
• 39:13
  Speaker 1: and going into the next to it the first door
• 39:16
  Speaker 1: that was open i whipped in and shut the door
• 39:19
  Speaker 1: and bolted it oh mrs jervis said i what have
• 39:23
  Speaker 1: you done by me i see i can't confide in
• 39:26
  Speaker 1: anybody i am beset on all hands wretched wretched pamela
• 39:31
  Speaker 1: where shalt thou expect a friend if mrs jervis joins
• 39:34
  Speaker 1: to betray thee thus she made so many protestations telling
• 39:39
  Speaker 1: me all and that he owned i had made him
• 39:42
  Speaker 1: wipe his eyes two or three times and said she
• 39:45
  Speaker 1: hoped it would have a good effect and remembered me
• 39:48
  Speaker 1: that i had said nothing but what would rather move
• 39:50
  Speaker 1: compassion than resentment that i forgave her but oh that
• 39:55
  Speaker 1: i was safe from this house for never poor creature
• 39:58
  Speaker 1: sure was so flustered as i have been so many
• 40:01
  Speaker 1: months together i am called down from this most tedious
• 40:05
  Speaker 1: scribble i wonder what will next befall your dutiful daughter
• 40:10
  Speaker 1: mrs jervis says she is sure i shall have the
• 40:13
  Speaker 1: chariot to carry me home to you though this will
• 40:16
  Speaker 1: look too great for me, yet it will show as
• 40:18
  Speaker 1: if I was not turned away quite in disgrace. The
• 40:22
  Speaker 1: travelling chariot is come from Lincolnshire, and I fancy I
• 40:25
  Speaker 1: shall go in that, for the other is quite grand.
• 40:30
  Speaker 1: End of section 5