Latest / I Said No Gifts! A comedy interview podcast with Bridger Winegar / Martha Kelly Returns to Disobey Bridger Again

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Martha Kelly Returns to Disobey Bridger Again · I Said No Gifts! A comedy interview podcast with Bridger Winegar

• 0:08
  Speaker 1: But I invited you here. I thought I made myself
• 0:14
  Speaker 1: perfectly clear. When you're a guest in my home, you
• 0:21
  Speaker 1: gotta come to me empty. And I said, no, guests,
• 0:27
  Speaker 1: you're a presences presents enough. I already had too much stuff.
• 0:35
  Speaker 2: So how do you dare to surbey me?
• 0:49
  Speaker 3: Welcome to I said, no gifts. I'm richer wineger Or
• 0:55
  Speaker 3: in the podcast. I'm just kind of accessing the podcast
• 1:00
  Speaker 3: world right now, and I'm stepping in. There's something new
• 1:04
  Speaker 3: and fresh about it for me, even after six years,
• 1:08
  Speaker 3: today feels different. Well, I've used two public restrooms so
• 1:12
  Speaker 3: far today, but we've only just begun. God knows how
• 1:15
  Speaker 3: many I'll be all over town. So that's happened today.
• 1:19
  Speaker 3: Yesterday was the big thing. I took the dog to
• 1:23
  Speaker 3: get spade yesterday. So I mean, obviously my dreams of
• 1:30
  Speaker 3: opening a puppy mill are dashed again. I keep getting
• 1:33
  Speaker 3: in my own way. This is when people talk about
• 1:35
  Speaker 3: getting in your own way. This is what they're talking about,
• 1:38
  Speaker 3: getting your dog spade when you want to be just
• 1:41
  Speaker 3: breeding puppies to sell to people who drive land Rovers.
• 1:47
  Speaker 3: Land Rover or range Rover. They both for assholes. I
• 1:49
  Speaker 3: can't remember. And my apologies to anyone in those cars.
• 1:53
  Speaker 3: Maybe you're barely scraping by and all you could buy
• 1:55
  Speaker 3: was a Range Rover. I get it now that I've
• 1:58
  Speaker 3: alienated anyone with large income. This is again getting in
• 2:06
  Speaker 3: your own way. That's actually a good example of me
• 2:09
  Speaker 3: getting I'm obviously in a flow state. I'm in an
• 2:13
  Speaker 3: absolute flow state. I'm making zero mistakes. Let's keep it going.
• 2:18
  Speaker 3: Let's talk about Patreon. This show is still on Patreon,
• 2:22
  Speaker 3: despite everybody trying to tear me down. Come join us.
• 2:28
  Speaker 3: You can listen to more of this podcast, but it's
• 2:31
  Speaker 3: me recording it in the backyard, kind of like the
• 2:33
  Speaker 3: old days. I'm also recapping Real Housewives of Salt Lake City,
• 2:37
  Speaker 3: Secret Lives, and Mormon Wives, which is and oh, all
• 2:41
  Speaker 3: of our live shows are there to watch as well.
• 2:43
  Speaker 3: I mean, that's just we're barely scraping the surface. I'd
• 2:46
  Speaker 3: even mention the sleep tape I created that everyone loved.
• 2:52
  Speaker 3: I think I've gone too far. This all started with
• 2:56
  Speaker 3: two public restrooms. Let's get into the podcast. I oh,
• 3:00
  Speaker 3: oh my god, I love today's guest. It's Martha Kelly.
• 3:02
  Speaker 3: Martha welcomed.
• 3:03
  Speaker 2: I said no gifts, thank you, Bridger. It's great to
• 3:06
  Speaker 2: be here.
• 3:06
  Speaker 3: I feel like I kind of just I started something
• 3:09
  Speaker 3: there then just I feel like I took more time
• 3:12
  Speaker 3: than usual, and I apologize.
• 3:14
  Speaker 2: Now I am thrilled because now as soon as I
• 3:18
  Speaker 2: get home today, I'm going to subscribe to your Patreon.
• 3:22
  Speaker 3: This was really targeting you.
• 3:23
  Speaker 2: And I'm so excited. I love when people i'm a
• 3:27
  Speaker 2: fan of have Patreons, and a lot of people do,
• 3:30
  Speaker 2: but not everyone. So I'm thrilled.
• 3:32
  Speaker 3: So you should have a Patreon just for I.
• 3:34
  Speaker 2: Don't have a podcast, but yeah, I'm gonna start a Patreon.
• 3:38
  Speaker 3: Well, what you're doing on TikTok should be I would
• 3:40
  Speaker 3: pay for what you do on TikTok. I don't be
• 3:50
  Speaker 3: modest about this. It's so good.
• 3:52
  Speaker 2: Thanks Bridger. The way I think of it as one
• 3:55
  Speaker 2: of my favorite expressions that I've seen from a lot
• 3:59
  Speaker 2: of people I fall on social media, which is when
• 4:02
  Speaker 2: someone is singing terribly or causing any kind of loud ruckus,
• 4:08
  Speaker 2: they just refer to it as houtin and hollering, and
• 4:11
  Speaker 2: I feel like that is what my TikTok mostly is,
• 4:16
  Speaker 2: and hollering.
• 4:17
  Speaker 3: It's very good, and it's like it's such a cure
• 4:20
  Speaker 3: to what else is going on on TikTok, which is
• 4:22
  Speaker 3: very quick cuts, and all of this this is just
• 4:25
  Speaker 3: you talking and you giving us everything you want to
• 4:28
  Speaker 3: give us, No apologies, it's you.
• 4:33
  Speaker 2: Don't know how many times I've said to myself, how
• 4:36
  Speaker 2: about putting some more effort into this so that it
• 4:39
  Speaker 2: is like those successful tiktoks that are quick cuts, written
• 4:44
  Speaker 2: out ahead of time, well edited, fast paced. I say
• 4:48
  Speaker 2: to myself, why not try that? That seems to work
• 4:51
  Speaker 2: for people.
• 4:51
  Speaker 3: That would be so alarming. I would feel so betrayed
• 4:54
  Speaker 3: by you.
• 4:55
  Speaker 2: Okay, I'll never do it.
• 4:56
  Speaker 3: And you are using one one piece of technology in
• 5:00
  Speaker 3: your tiktoks, which is I think extremely valuable, which is
• 5:03
  Speaker 3: Republican woman makeup, Yes, which is kind of a filter. Yeah,
• 5:07
  Speaker 3: And how did you find that filter?
• 5:10
  Speaker 2: I think that I just saw maybe like a year ago,
• 5:15
  Speaker 2: I saw someone using it. There's a person I follow
• 5:18
  Speaker 2: named Suzanne Lambert, okay, and she kind of when I
• 5:22
  Speaker 2: first started seeing her tiktoks, she would be doing makeup
• 5:26
  Speaker 2: tutorials for how to do Republican women makeup, and it
• 5:30
  Speaker 2: was making fun of how over done they are, right,
• 5:35
  Speaker 2: And then some people started using the Republican woman makeup
• 5:38
  Speaker 2: filter to be like, wow, this is what I would
• 5:40
  Speaker 2: look like with that, And then I was like, I
• 5:43
  Speaker 2: kind of love that when I'm not wearing makeup and
• 5:46
  Speaker 2: I don't want to be on camera, instead of using
• 5:48
  Speaker 2: a filter that makes me look pretty in a way
• 5:52
  Speaker 2: that people would be disappointed to find, not in person
• 5:57
  Speaker 2: to slap on Republican women makeup filmilter, and then no
• 6:01
  Speaker 2: one's gonna be like, oh wow, your your nose isn't
• 6:06
  Speaker 2: pointing and your lips aren't full. They're gonna be like, wow, well,
• 6:10
  Speaker 2: I'm glad that you're not garishly made up.
• 6:15
  Speaker 3: I would love to run into you just at the
• 6:16
  Speaker 3: store in a full face of Republican makeup.
• 6:20
  Speaker 2: Well, I would have to have fake eyelashes to make too.
• 6:25
  Speaker 2: But also the filter, I mean, in a way it
• 6:28
  Speaker 2: does still falsely improve your looks because it does make
• 6:34
  Speaker 2: my eyes look more youthful by not tilting down but
• 6:38
  Speaker 2: tilting up like it's still so even if I tried
• 6:41
  Speaker 2: to recreate it, I wouldn't look like the filter.
• 6:43
  Speaker 3: Okay, I should try the Republican woman make up just
• 6:47
  Speaker 3: in my personal time, my private use.
• 6:49
  Speaker 2: For private fun.
• 6:52
  Speaker 3: Have you ever worn fake eye lashes?
• 6:55
  Speaker 1: Yeah?
• 6:55
  Speaker 2: But only in like Hollywood situations, And I don't want
• 7:00
  Speaker 2: to because I don't want there to be an even
• 7:03
  Speaker 2: bigger gap between what I see when I wake up
• 7:06
  Speaker 2: in the morning in the mirror and what I look
• 7:09
  Speaker 2: like when I'm out in the world, because then if
• 7:13
  Speaker 2: I and this is, this is never gonna happen. But
• 7:16
  Speaker 2: if I ever tried dating again and slept with a man,
• 7:21
  Speaker 2: I wouldn't want it to be like have you seen Martha?
• 7:25
  Speaker 2: Because you're not her, but you don't you don't look
• 7:29
  Speaker 2: like the woman I went to bed with, like like
• 7:32
  Speaker 2: fake like fake eyelashes are a bridge too far.
• 7:37
  Speaker 3: I think they are for almost anybody.
• 7:38
  Speaker 2: Yeah, but although there are some that you can get
• 7:41
  Speaker 2: that are little, like tiny pieces that are just like
• 7:44
  Speaker 2: two or three individual lashes you can put on. Someone
• 7:48
  Speaker 2: did that to me a week ago for a marketing
• 7:52
  Speaker 2: thing for euphoria, and that was kind of fun. But
• 7:56
  Speaker 2: I just don't want people to be disappointed when they
• 7:59
  Speaker 2: see me in par I'd rather they go, Wow, you're
• 8:02
  Speaker 2: not you. Actually, you don't look that bad.
• 8:07
  Speaker 3: No one has ever thought that about you. I don't
• 8:10
  Speaker 3: I mean, you're adorable, You're I would say, you're an
• 8:12
  Speaker 3: adorable person.
• 8:14
  Speaker 2: Well, I feel the same way about you.
• 8:15
  Speaker 3: Bridget two real cute people.
• 8:17
  Speaker 2: We're just out here being cuties. Well, I did want
• 8:21
  Speaker 2: a lady in a grocery store years ago when Baskets
• 8:25
  Speaker 2: was on said came up to me and said, hey,
• 8:29
  Speaker 2: you're you're on Baskets right, And I said yeah, and
• 8:31
  Speaker 2: she goes, I'm so happy to see you look so
• 8:35
  Speaker 2: good in person. And I just feel so much better
• 8:37
  Speaker 2: because I was worried about you.
• 8:42
  Speaker 3: Because of the way your character looks in Baskets.
• 8:45
  Speaker 2: I think so, And just like I think part of
• 8:48
  Speaker 2: that character was that she is a little bit of
• 8:51
  Speaker 2: a sad sack in a way.
• 8:53
  Speaker 3: She just like a broken arm for a good period
• 8:55
  Speaker 3: of time.
• 8:56
  Speaker 2: Right, broken arm and like where's like long church lady
• 9:02
  Speaker 2: dresses even though she doesn't go to church, and is
• 9:04
  Speaker 2: and is kind of Zach's characters, not punching bag, but
• 9:09
  Speaker 2: kind of like I always thought they were like Burt
• 9:12
  Speaker 2: Reynolds and Dom Delouise, And my character was the Dom
• 9:15
  Speaker 2: Delauize character. So I think maybe people felt empathy for
• 9:21
  Speaker 2: that character, but maybe also a little bit like could
• 9:24
  Speaker 2: somebody help this lady?
• 9:28
  Speaker 3: Well, she's got She's the better of the two as
• 9:31
  Speaker 3: far as people go, she's just kind of a.
• 9:35
  Speaker 2: Yeah. It's funny though, because I I don't think that
• 9:39
  Speaker 2: I even really registered that, because I love Zach so
• 9:43
  Speaker 2: much and the making the show was just hanging out
• 9:46
  Speaker 2: with one of the most fun people you could ever
• 9:48
  Speaker 2: hang out with, Right, So I didn't think of Chip
• 9:53
  Speaker 2: as being as terrible of a person as he clearly
• 9:56
  Speaker 2: is written.
• 9:56
  Speaker 3: To be sure, right, I had a weird I don't
• 10:00
  Speaker 3: think I've talked about this on this podcast, but I
• 10:02
  Speaker 3: was at a restaurant in Silver Lake, just like a
• 10:04
  Speaker 3: little fast food place a few months ago, and I,
• 10:08
  Speaker 3: out of the corner of my eye saw this man
• 10:10
  Speaker 3: it's like with a child, and it's like, oh God,
• 10:13
  Speaker 3: look at this Silver Lake dad. Who's this jerk? And
• 10:18
  Speaker 3: I kept looking over and making eye contact with him,
• 10:20
  Speaker 3: and the third time I was like, oh no, that's
• 10:22
  Speaker 3: Zach Kalns. I felt so stupid, But I think he's
• 10:30
  Speaker 3: kind of the prototype of that sort of look, so
• 10:32
  Speaker 3: he yeah, he should be blamed for having a beard
• 10:35
  Speaker 3: and like kind of just being a scruffy guy. Yeah,
• 10:39
  Speaker 3: but at the time it was just like, Oh, look,
• 10:42
  Speaker 3: who's cool. The most uncomfortable eye contact the third time
• 10:48
  Speaker 3: was like oh no, this is shameful. He's just having
• 10:50
  Speaker 3: a nice night with his kid, and here.
• 10:52
  Speaker 2: I am funny.
• 10:53
  Speaker 3: Oh terrible, absolutely terrible. Last time you were on the
• 11:00
  Speaker 3: podcast was over Zoom, which was years and years ago,
• 11:04
  Speaker 3: and you gave me you helped me adopt a gorilla.
• 11:06
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 11:07
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I checked into the gorilla recently and it seems
• 11:11
  Speaker 3: to be doing fine.
• 11:12
  Speaker 2: Okay, good.
• 11:14
  Speaker 3: It seems like a lot of people have adopted it,
• 11:16
  Speaker 3: and really so yeah, all kinds of people have adopted
• 11:19
  Speaker 3: this gorilla, So I think it's okay.
• 11:21
  Speaker 2: Are you going to sue for custody where.
• 11:24
  Speaker 3: I'm headed here, I'm like, this is going to be
• 11:26
  Speaker 3: a bitter custody battle. I will get soul custody and
• 11:33
  Speaker 3: to the point that the gorilla will be mad at me,
• 11:35
  Speaker 3: you know, this sort of thing where it's like, well
• 11:37
  Speaker 3: I still want to see mom and no, no, your mine,
• 11:42
  Speaker 3: and this is a better situation. I fought for you.
• 11:45
  Speaker 3: But I think it's out there, it's having a wonderful
• 11:48
  Speaker 3: life and good. I don't know.
• 11:51
  Speaker 2: I love gorillas, but I can't fully even look at
• 11:55
  Speaker 2: the emails from them anymore from that organization because because
• 12:00
  Speaker 2: I love it's hard. They're too the pathos of a gorilla.
• 12:05
  Speaker 2: Course I can't handle it.
• 12:07
  Speaker 3: Right, if you have some level of empathy or sympathy
• 12:10
  Speaker 3: for these gorillas, you will just it will be a money.
• 12:13
  Speaker 2: Pit, even if they're just even if it's just like
• 12:16
  Speaker 2: look at this newborn baby gorilla with his love and
• 12:19
  Speaker 2: gorilla family, and they're all doing great. You look at
• 12:23
  Speaker 2: their faces and it hurts. They're so cute and.
• 12:26
  Speaker 3: They have just like always a natural like slight melancholy
• 12:29
  Speaker 3: to them.
• 12:30
  Speaker 2: Right, they're kind of.
• 12:31
  Speaker 3: Built to exploit humans financial situations.
• 12:36
  Speaker 2: You know, now that we're talking about it, we should
• 12:39
  Speaker 2: get a gorilla and make some money.
• 12:43
  Speaker 3: I'm fighting your custody of one. Why do you think
• 12:45
  Speaker 3: I'm trying to get control of this thing. It's my plan.
• 12:48
  Speaker 3: B it's having a gorilla.
• 12:51
  Speaker 2: We gotta do it.
• 12:52
  Speaker 3: What have you been up to? What's new?
• 12:55
  Speaker 2: What is new? While I'm going on a storm chasing
• 12:57
  Speaker 2: tour in June?
• 12:59
  Speaker 3: What?
• 13:00
  Speaker 2: Well, there's companies that do professional storm chasing toys, like
• 13:05
  Speaker 2: if you went on an elder My parents used to
• 13:07
  Speaker 2: do this, like an elder hostile tour of Japan or something.
• 13:12
  Speaker 2: I mean, not nearly. I'm sure it won't be it
• 13:15
  Speaker 2: won't be anything like that in terms of they were
• 13:17
  Speaker 2: staying at nice places and being shown wonderful times and
• 13:21
  Speaker 2: relax relaxing luxury accommodations and transportation. This is just a
• 13:26
  Speaker 2: company where it's like six to eight people in a
• 13:29
  Speaker 2: van and then I mean like probably six paying guests
• 13:34
  Speaker 2: and then the staff, which will be professional meteorologists and
• 13:39
  Speaker 2: people have been doing this for years, right. They go
• 13:42
  Speaker 2: all over the country. I'm not all over the country,
• 13:46
  Speaker 2: all over a tornado alley, right, and then you just
• 13:50
  Speaker 2: you start in want some place to start in Oklahoma.
• 13:53
  Speaker 2: Some start in Colorado, and then you ride in a
• 13:57
  Speaker 2: van for a week and oh my, chase storms. You
• 14:01
  Speaker 2: don't get close enough to ever be in danger.
• 14:03
  Speaker 3: Okay, but who's a judge of that.
• 14:05
  Speaker 2: Well, so we're going through the Great Plains, and so
• 14:11
  Speaker 2: you can see a storm from a safe distance when
• 14:14
  Speaker 2: everything's flat. That's my understanding, right, But I'll be honest,
• 14:18
  Speaker 2: I don't care if I do get carried away by.
• 14:22
  Speaker 3: What? Why not?
• 14:25
  Speaker 2: What they pick you up, they set you down somewhere interesting?
• 14:29
  Speaker 2: Why not?
• 14:30
  Speaker 3: As I certainly people have been mildly sucked up by
• 14:33
  Speaker 3: tornadoes before and survived.
• 14:36
  Speaker 2: Yeah, but I think I mean sadly. I think normally,
• 14:39
  Speaker 2: if the tornado is powerful enough to lift you up,
• 14:44
  Speaker 2: you're not coming out of it in good shape.
• 14:46
  Speaker 3: You're not going to be the same after.
• 14:48
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and most likely not the same in the sense
• 14:52
  Speaker 2: of not being alive.
• 14:55
  Speaker 3: Have you seen a tornado in person before? No.
• 14:58
  Speaker 2: I saw a rotating cloud one. It's in Austin, Okay,
• 15:02
  Speaker 2: that's the closest I've gotten. But it was a fast
• 15:04
  Speaker 2: moving thunderstorm. So it was like, cloud's going over me
• 15:08
  Speaker 2: kind of fast and one of them going like this
• 15:10
  Speaker 2: but not coming down here.
• 15:12
  Speaker 3: That's frightening though, Yeah, it was.
• 15:13
  Speaker 2: It was thrilling and frightening.
• 15:15
  Speaker 3: Did you feel like this is it was going to
• 15:17
  Speaker 3: become a tornado and then seek shelter or was everybody like, oh,
• 15:21
  Speaker 3: that's fine.
• 15:22
  Speaker 2: I wasn't worried about because it was moving away from
• 15:25
  Speaker 2: me so quickly. I figured if it did turn into
• 15:28
  Speaker 2: a tornado, I wouldn't use somebody else's problem.
• 15:33
  Speaker 3: What sparked this interest for you?
• 15:36
  Speaker 2: I've loved thunderstorms literally since being a baby. There is
• 15:41
  Speaker 2: a story my parents would tell that we went to
• 15:45
  Speaker 2: my mom's from East Texas. So my brother's a year
• 15:49
  Speaker 2: and a half older, than me and my twin sister.
• 15:52
  Speaker 2: So we're all babies at one point.
• 15:54
  Speaker 3: Wow, that's a lot, so.
• 15:56
  Speaker 2: Much for my mom, God bless her. We drived us
• 15:59
  Speaker 2: to East Texas. We get there at night and it's
• 16:03
  Speaker 2: a thunderstorm and they can't bring all three babies inside
• 16:09
  Speaker 2: at once. They can bring at most two of us
• 16:11
  Speaker 2: because there's two of them, right, And they didn't want
• 16:15
  Speaker 2: to leave one baby alone in a thunderstorm, so they
• 16:17
  Speaker 2: left me and my sister in the car, took my
• 16:20
  Speaker 2: brother in, came to get us, and when they opened
• 16:23
  Speaker 2: the car door, we were laughing hysterically at the thunder.
• 16:29
  Speaker 2: I don't remember that. I just remember hearing that story
• 16:32
  Speaker 2: more than a couple times. Oh that's incredible, and I
• 16:35
  Speaker 2: do love thunderstorms. And then the movie Twister really of
• 16:38
  Speaker 2: course made me feel like I gotta get out there.
• 16:42
  Speaker 3: It'd be a fun I've never well, let's see, no,
• 16:44
  Speaker 3: i've never seen one in person. I feel like that
• 16:47
  Speaker 3: would be exciting.
• 16:48
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I think it would be exciting if it's especially
• 16:50
  Speaker 2: if it's not coming.
• 16:52
  Speaker 3: At you right. Yeah, yeah, you're in a van on tour. Yeah,
• 16:56
  Speaker 3: just kind of taking a peek.
• 16:58
  Speaker 2: And then I think it'll be an adventure to meet
• 17:01
  Speaker 2: a little group of strangers and travel together.
• 17:04
  Speaker 3: Have you been on a tour like this before. No.
• 17:06
  Speaker 2: I have a friend who did the same tour with
• 17:09
  Speaker 2: the same company, like because they have like I think
• 17:12
  Speaker 2: they have like ten per season, starting in April and
• 17:17
  Speaker 2: going through July, Okay, and they go to different regions
• 17:23
  Speaker 2: depending on which tour it is and what month it is,
• 17:28
  Speaker 2: And so she went on the same one. I'm going
• 17:30
  Speaker 2: on the same week the same travel path, which will
• 17:35
  Speaker 2: be through Wyoming, I think Montana and the Dakotas both.
• 17:41
  Speaker 3: It will be disappointing.
• 17:44
  Speaker 2: I've never been to the Dakotas, and I'm kind of
• 17:46
  Speaker 2: excited to see the I just love open country and
• 17:51
  Speaker 2: being a passenger not a.
• 17:53
  Speaker 3: Driver, right. I just feel like Wyoming doesn't feel like
• 17:56
  Speaker 3: tornado or storm country to me.
• 17:58
  Speaker 2: Maybe we're not going through there because it's like I'm
• 18:01
  Speaker 2: not familiar with the I mean, I can't remember the map,
• 18:04
  Speaker 2: but it's like we start in Colorado and we go up.
• 18:07
  Speaker 3: Okay, probably catch some Wyoming.
• 18:10
  Speaker 2: Then and then like Montana and then South Dakota and
• 18:13
  Speaker 2: North Dakota.
• 18:14
  Speaker 3: And you've never been to the Have you been to
• 18:16
  Speaker 3: Montana or any of those areas. No, oh, it's so beautiful.
• 18:19
  Speaker 3: I've never been to the Dakotas.
• 18:21
  Speaker 2: But I've never been. I mean, is Yellowstone in Wyoming?
• 18:26
  Speaker 3: This always makes me feel stupid. I think it's in
• 18:28
  Speaker 3: Wyoming and Montana. Is that right?
• 18:32
  Speaker 2: If so, I've been to which in Wyoming. It also
• 18:36
  Speaker 2: spreads into Montana in parts of Idaho.
• 18:38
  Speaker 3: So this makes me feel like a genius.
• 18:41
  Speaker 2: Okay, you were right, I'm right. So I've been to
• 18:43
  Speaker 2: Yellowstone as a kid.
• 18:44
  Speaker 3: Okay, did you see Old Faithful?
• 18:48
  Speaker 2: We did, but I don't remember. I just remember my
• 18:50
  Speaker 2: parents talking about it.
• 18:52
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't remember seeing it. I remember smelling it,
• 18:54
  Speaker 3: but I don't remember the actual smell.
• 18:56
  Speaker 2: Weird.
• 18:56
  Speaker 3: It's like sulfur. Okay, there's a lot of because I
• 18:58
  Speaker 3: think those hot pots have a lot of sulfur in them.
• 19:01
  Speaker 3: Oh yeah, but that's essentially all I remember from that trip. Yeah,
• 19:06
  Speaker 3: it's literally it. And then eating some bad pizza. Why
• 19:09
  Speaker 3: were we getting pizza in Montana? It's a big question.
• 19:12
  Speaker 2: And why couldn't they come up with a good pizza Montana?
• 19:15
  Speaker 2: Come on, come, you can make pizza.
• 19:20
  Speaker 3: I do think that this is true. I think every state, well,
• 19:22
  Speaker 3: at this point, probably every state has some good pizza.
• 19:24
  Speaker 3: I think that there was a learning curve for a
• 19:27
  Speaker 3: large part of the United States where New York got
• 19:29
  Speaker 3: to claim they were the only good place with pizza.
• 19:31
  Speaker 3: I think at this point you can get good pizza
• 19:34
  Speaker 3: wherever you go.
• 19:35
  Speaker 2: There's a pizza place in my dad's little, tiny hometown
• 19:38
  Speaker 2: in Massachusetts that has some of the best pizza I've
• 19:42
  Speaker 2: ever had in my entire life.
• 19:44
  Speaker 3: What is it called.
• 19:46
  Speaker 2: Well, it's changed over the years, so I don't know now,
• 19:49
  Speaker 2: but it's just it's a place called Forge Village, and
• 19:52
  Speaker 2: it's a tiny little town. There's just like a couple
• 19:56
  Speaker 2: stores and a pizza place, right and an old, no
• 20:00
  Speaker 2: longer in use, textile mill, which is where my grandparents work.
• 20:05
  Speaker 3: Oh my god, that's amazing.
• 20:07
  Speaker 2: Yeah, Like they moved there. They moved there from England
• 20:09
  Speaker 2: with other of their siblings as young adults because that
• 20:14
  Speaker 2: factory was like, we'll give you jobs and a place
• 20:17
  Speaker 2: to live if you moved to America work here.
• 20:19
  Speaker 3: Wow.
• 20:19
  Speaker 2: So yeah wow.
• 20:21
  Speaker 3: And what were they doing at the textile mill.
• 20:23
  Speaker 2: I guess just working on like factory lines or something.
• 20:27
  Speaker 2: I don't I've never I should have. It's it's kind
• 20:31
  Speaker 2: of late now because they're all gone. But why wasn't
• 20:35
  Speaker 2: I a shitty kid? I didn't even ever ask.
• 20:41
  Speaker 3: Style Mill thoughtless grandchild, horrible granddaughter of the year. Really,
• 20:48
  Speaker 3: back to the tour, just briefly, how do you do
• 20:50
  Speaker 3: in a situation like that with strangers? Because I feel like,
• 20:54
  Speaker 3: for me David, probably like six hours and they'd be like, oh,
• 20:59
  Speaker 3: I don't think he likes us, And it wouldn't be
• 21:01
  Speaker 3: because of that. It's just I don't handle that sort
• 21:03
  Speaker 3: of thing that well.
• 21:05
  Speaker 2: I relate to that, but I think that I have
• 21:09
  Speaker 2: been surprised to find out how inevitable it is that
• 21:12
  Speaker 2: I'll get attached to people if I spend a lot
• 21:16
  Speaker 2: of time with them over multiple days.
• 21:19
  Speaker 3: Right, a forced excuse to talk to each other.
• 21:22
  Speaker 2: Yeah, And like I mean, because I did, just to
• 21:25
  Speaker 2: be Johnny Hollywood for a second. I did two days
• 21:29
  Speaker 2: on a sketch show a couple of weeks ago, two
• 21:33
  Speaker 2: days and not even two full days, And when it ended,
• 21:37
  Speaker 2: I was like, I'm gonna miss these people.
• 21:39
  Speaker 3: Oh that's really sweet.
• 21:42
  Speaker 2: Their casts and their crew were just really lovely.
• 21:45
  Speaker 3: That's wonderful. Can you say what show was yet?
• 21:48
  Speaker 2: I don't know. I should have asked.
• 21:51
  Speaker 3: You didn't care about it at all, or those people.
• 21:53
  Speaker 2: I don't want to get out of it. I don't
• 21:55
  Speaker 2: care if it even comes out.
• 21:57
  Speaker 3: You're campaigning against it.
• 22:00
  Speaker 2: Hearing to say, don't watch any if you hear on
• 22:02
  Speaker 2: the grapevine that there's a sketch show that I'm in,
• 22:05
  Speaker 2: do not watch it.
• 22:06
  Speaker 3: Just don't watch sketch shows in general, to be safe.
• 22:09
  Speaker 2: Yeah, just to keep it, keep it real.
• 22:14
  Speaker 3: Ah, Well, I think there's something else we should talk about.
• 22:17
  Speaker 3: I've been trying to avoid the subject as long as possible.
• 22:20
  Speaker 2: I get it.
• 22:21
  Speaker 3: You remember the huge blow up we had it in
• 22:23
  Speaker 3: the last time we recorded, how there were years between
• 22:26
  Speaker 3: that we barely spoke. The podcast is called I said
• 22:30
  Speaker 3: no gifts, and I really thought today you wouldn't bring anything,
• 22:35
  Speaker 3: and so I was frankly just kind of blown away
• 22:38
  Speaker 3: when you showed up with the scoregeous gift bag.
• 22:40
  Speaker 2: Yeah it is. I did really go all out for
• 22:43
  Speaker 2: the gift bag.
• 22:45
  Speaker 3: Well, should we open it here on the podcast?
• 22:47
  Speaker 1: Yeah?
• 22:48
  Speaker 2: Can I give a Can I give a pre I
• 22:52
  Speaker 2: don't want to say disclaimer.
• 22:54
  Speaker 3: I love when people start explaining about a gift before
• 22:56
  Speaker 3: it's even open.
• 22:58
  Speaker 2: I just want to say no, pressure. But I did
• 23:01
  Speaker 2: bring you as a gift one of my most precious
• 23:05
  Speaker 2: personal items from my home.
• 23:07
  Speaker 3: Oh my god.
• 23:08
  Speaker 2: But I will also say I might be the only
• 23:12
  Speaker 2: person in the world who considers it a precious item.
• 23:15
  Speaker 3: It's a shoot up a lot of gum.
• 23:17
  Speaker 2: No, it's it's just And I will tell you also
• 23:21
  Speaker 2: that I am going to buy another one because I
• 23:23
  Speaker 2: really want.
• 23:24
  Speaker 3: I want to hearing the sort of thing where you're like, oh,
• 23:27
  Speaker 3: I don't want to give it away.
• 23:28
  Speaker 2: No I do, because it's not expensive, Okay, And I'm
• 23:31
  Speaker 2: just going to buy another one. That's how much I
• 23:33
  Speaker 2: love it. You're not gonna love it, and I'm already sorry,
• 23:36
  Speaker 2: but I love it.
• 23:41
  Speaker 3: Oh, this is wonderful.
• 23:43
  Speaker 2: It's a refrigerator, magnet of a frog, port, a serious
• 23:47
  Speaker 2: portrait of a frog in a wood.
• 23:49
  Speaker 3: It's a really beautiful kind of bob Bob with bangs,
• 23:53
  Speaker 3: kind of a jet black. I'm trying to think of, uh,
• 23:57
  Speaker 3: who has hair a hairstyle like this.
• 24:00
  Speaker 2: Oh it's not a Lord Farquah.
• 24:04
  Speaker 3: Yeah, it's a Jason. If this wasn't a man, it
• 24:07
  Speaker 3: probably would be right.
• 24:09
  Speaker 2: I mean, I've been assuming that is a man.
• 24:11
  Speaker 3: I kind of just jumped immediately to you know, hip
• 24:14
  Speaker 3: young woman twenties. She's in like owns a record store
• 24:17
  Speaker 3: or something.
• 24:18
  Speaker 2: It's funny. I've been thinking of like eleven year old
• 24:22
  Speaker 2: boy school portrait. That's how I've been thinking of it,
• 24:27
  Speaker 2: and that is the parents hanging it on their refrigerator.
• 24:31
  Speaker 3: This is a great test for therapists. They should this
• 24:34
  Speaker 3: should be a new h What do you see with
• 24:36
  Speaker 3: the frog and a wig? Because I absolutely saw this
• 24:39
  Speaker 3: hip young woman, but I could also see that being
• 24:42
  Speaker 3: a little boy who and he's embarrassed of this picture.
• 24:44
  Speaker 2: Now he's kind of like I'm in fifth grade. I
• 24:48
  Speaker 2: honestly thought this would be a more exciting time of life.
• 24:51
  Speaker 2: I thought I was going to be hitting my stride,
• 24:54
  Speaker 2: But here I am in a wig?
• 24:56
  Speaker 3: Where did you?
• 24:57
  Speaker 2: I found it on TikTok and I'm gonna buy it.
• 25:00
  Speaker 2: That's why I know I can buy another one.
• 25:02
  Speaker 3: Do you do a lot of TikTok shopping? I have.
• 25:05
  Speaker 2: I'm trying to cool my jets because I don't want
• 25:09
  Speaker 2: to be accumulating junk. So some things I've gotten off
• 25:14
  Speaker 2: there I have loved, and some things have been truly garbage.
• 25:18
  Speaker 3: What's been some of the garbage you've gotten.
• 25:20
  Speaker 2: I got some irrasable gel pens that don't work at all.
• 25:24
  Speaker 3: A raceable ink. We've got to just stop talking about
• 25:27
  Speaker 3: that as a concept.
• 25:28
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it's not good. I remember in sixth grade it
• 25:30
  Speaker 2: was a big thing. Paper Mate I think had erasable
• 25:34
  Speaker 2: ink pens, and they were they just tore up your
• 25:37
  Speaker 2: paper when you were.
• 25:38
  Speaker 3: Rais paper tearing and smudges.
• 25:39
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it didn't really, they were terrible. These tricked me.
• 25:46
  Speaker 2: I've gotten some eyeshadow palette that is basically like a
• 25:52
  Speaker 2: water color palette. It's the brightest primary colors, and I
• 25:56
  Speaker 2: tried all of them. I was like, this is ridiculous.
• 26:00
  Speaker 3: Clown makeup.
• 26:01
  Speaker 2: It's clown makeup, or it's very young women with a
• 26:05
  Speaker 2: certain kind of eyelid makeup where they can really do
• 26:09
  Speaker 2: different if you're young and doing different layers of mixes
• 26:13
  Speaker 2: of colors or whatever. Frog in a wig, it's frog
• 26:17
  Speaker 2: and a wig makeup.
• 26:18
  Speaker 3: That's a good filter. Frog and a wig.
• 26:20
  Speaker 2: Let's get that. God, I would love to have that filter.
• 26:25
  Speaker 3: Yeah. Those TikTok things almost always get I've never fallen
• 26:28
  Speaker 3: for one, but they always make every product seem like, well,
• 26:31
  Speaker 3: this is the exact solution. For a thing you were
• 26:34
  Speaker 3: not thinking about before. Yeah, and then they demonstrate it
• 26:37
  Speaker 3: and it works. But yeah, clearly they're just using another
• 26:43
  Speaker 3: product or the magic of Hollywood.
• 26:46
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and there what I've gotten other stuff like there
• 26:49
  Speaker 2: was a little tripod lighting stick that had two lights
• 26:56
  Speaker 2: on either side of it, ring lights on either side
• 26:59
  Speaker 2: of it, and like one of them immediately broke off
• 27:02
  Speaker 2: and more.
• 27:02
  Speaker 3: Than just half of your face is making Yeah.
• 27:05
  Speaker 2: And then the other one doesn't work. Now that's been
• 27:08
  Speaker 2: a while, but I'm trying to think of Boughton some
• 27:11
  Speaker 2: real I mean, Boughton I bought.
• 27:13
  Speaker 3: I think, by the way, we should just bring botton
• 27:15
  Speaker 3: into the language that's at it.
• 27:18
  Speaker 2: Yeah, Boughton to me is in the same delightful category
• 27:21
  Speaker 2: as hooton and hollering.
• 27:24
  Speaker 3: That is kind of the same dictionary. Yeah, yeah, Boughton,
• 27:28
  Speaker 3: we all know it makes sense.
• 27:29
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and if people are saying casted, then I can
• 27:33
  Speaker 2: say botan absolutely so.
• 27:35
  Speaker 3: But what have you boughten that's worked?
• 27:38
  Speaker 2: Oh and I also bought a keyboard that doesn't.
• 27:40
  Speaker 3: Work, musical keyboard.
• 27:43
  Speaker 2: Or a noah, a typing really pretty pink clickety clocking buttons,
• 27:48
  Speaker 2: and I can't get it to work. Oh, no, Yeah,
• 27:50
  Speaker 2: I can't hook it up at all. What have I
• 27:53
  Speaker 2: got this work? Because well, I mean the the frog
• 27:56
  Speaker 2: and a wig. I have gotten other very cute refrigerator magnets.
• 28:00
  Speaker 2: I've gotten some. I get a lot of press on.
• 28:03
  Speaker 2: All the press on nails I get, which I'm not
• 28:05
  Speaker 2: wearing right now, but I get them all from TikTok.
• 28:07
  Speaker 3: That makes sense. Yeah, that feels like a category that
• 28:10
  Speaker 3: you could trust on TikTok.
• 28:11
  Speaker 2: Yeah, although I will say they call many of them short,
• 28:17
  Speaker 2: and they are not short. You have to get extra
• 28:19
  Speaker 2: short which are still too long.
• 28:21
  Speaker 3: So they come and they're just super long nails.
• 28:23
  Speaker 2: They're just not as crazy long, but they're still longer
• 28:27
  Speaker 2: than You have to accept that part of your hand
• 28:32
  Speaker 2: function will be decreased when you're wearing press on nails.
• 28:35
  Speaker 3: This is how we find out you couldn't use the keyboard.
• 28:37
  Speaker 3: The keyboard it's not working because your nails are too long.
• 28:40
  Speaker 2: I should have tried them.
• 28:41
  Speaker 3: Well.
• 28:42
  Speaker 2: I got this tote bag, and I love.
• 28:43
  Speaker 3: Tobag bags from TikTok.
• 28:45
  Speaker 2: That toe bag. I also got other tote bags from TikTok,
• 28:48
  Speaker 2: one of which I didn't really like and gave away
• 28:52
  Speaker 2: to someone who did like it.
• 28:53
  Speaker 3: Okay, Yeah, TikTok. The one thing that always stops me
• 28:57
  Speaker 3: is I think, oh, of that seems affordable whatever, and
• 28:58
  Speaker 3: then I shipping is over two dollars. I think, well
• 29:01
  Speaker 3: it's too expensive.
• 29:03
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 29:03
  Speaker 3: Seeing something that's not free shipping at this point, unfortunately,
• 29:06
  Speaker 3: really freezes me in my tracks.
• 29:08
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I totally get it. Wait. I also bought some
• 29:12
  Speaker 2: face stuff that wanted some medacube stuck.
• 29:15
  Speaker 3: Oh, this seems dangerous.
• 29:16
  Speaker 2: That when it arrived, I took one look at the
• 29:18
  Speaker 2: bottles and I said, you.
• 29:20
  Speaker 3: Can't put something on your face from TikTok.
• 29:22
  Speaker 2: No, I'm not doing that.
• 29:24
  Speaker 3: Absolutely, it will be a huge mistake.
• 29:26
  Speaker 2: Yeah, you'll be third degree burns. Not that metacube is
• 29:32
  Speaker 2: burning people, but just these particular products. I said, that
• 29:36
  Speaker 2: looks like a solvent that's used to take off super glue.
• 29:39
  Speaker 2: I'm not putting it on my face.
• 29:42
  Speaker 3: There are certain things that are worth paying for and
• 29:44
  Speaker 3: getting the advice of professionals rather than influencers. Yes, like
• 29:48
  Speaker 3: your skin things you ingest are probably another category. Yeah,
• 29:55
  Speaker 3: what was the first thing you bought on TikTok? Do
• 29:56
  Speaker 3: you remember?
• 29:58
  Speaker 2: I think? I mean I have. I bought a tiny
• 30:01
  Speaker 2: air horn. I bought a tiny, a miniature trombone that
• 30:06
  Speaker 2: makes the sound that Chris Fairbanks always meant mates, which
• 30:09
  Speaker 2: is like, that's not it, but you know what I mean.
• 30:15
  Speaker 2: I bought a little plastic raccoon and a plastic garbage
• 30:19
  Speaker 2: can that I thought was cute, but my cats wouldn't
• 30:22
  Speaker 2: let me keep it on the dusk. They kept knocking
• 30:24
  Speaker 2: it off. I've got a lot of cheap plastic organizer
• 30:27
  Speaker 2: bins and shelves and things for your desk and bedroom
• 30:32
  Speaker 2: and bathroom. Got a lot of cheap plastic stuff off TikTok.
• 30:37
  Speaker 3: But for bathroom storage, I feel like that's going to
• 30:40
  Speaker 3: be cheap stuff no matter where you get it.
• 30:42
  Speaker 2: Yeah. But the one thing I got that unfortunately, am
• 30:45
  Speaker 2: gonna throw out as soon as I have time to
• 30:48
  Speaker 2: take on a project. It is going to be a
• 30:51
  Speaker 2: project because I have to take the things that are
• 30:53
  Speaker 2: in it out.
• 30:53
  Speaker 3: Oh no.
• 30:54
  Speaker 2: But it's like I thought it was neat because it
• 30:56
  Speaker 2: has like a plastic kind of bubble looking lid and
• 31:00
  Speaker 2: then drawers. But it's it's not good.
• 31:03
  Speaker 3: And is it something? Is the bubble lid? Does it
• 31:05
  Speaker 3: keep it from stacking other things on top of it?
• 31:07
  Speaker 2: It's I think it's supposed to keep it from to
• 31:11
  Speaker 2: keep things from being knocked over or getting dust on
• 31:15
  Speaker 2: them or something, but I I always leave it open.
• 31:19
  Speaker 2: Right now, I have like a bunch of hair products
• 31:21
  Speaker 2: that have dust on the lids. And also I looked
• 31:25
  Speaker 2: it up the other day. Your air condition central AC
• 31:29
  Speaker 2: is not supposed to be laying out a thin layer
• 31:31
  Speaker 2: of dust daily and mine is. So something's happening.
• 31:36
  Speaker 3: You haven't been in your new place that long, have you?
• 31:39
  Speaker 2: No?
• 31:39
  Speaker 1: Not?
• 31:39
  Speaker 2: I mean like eight months?
• 31:41
  Speaker 3: So what has got? What has happened in those eight months?
• 31:43
  Speaker 2: I'm assuming that the air conditioning filter was not brand
• 31:48
  Speaker 2: new when I moved in, and then I don't ever
• 31:50
  Speaker 2: pay attention to that stuff as I should, And now
• 31:54
  Speaker 2: I am paying attention.
• 31:56
  Speaker 3: Who can take care of this for you? That seems
• 31:58
  Speaker 3: very bad?
• 31:59
  Speaker 2: Well, I think I will buy a ladder from home Depot,
• 32:03
  Speaker 2: an indoor tall ladder because it's on the ceiling, it's
• 32:07
  Speaker 2: not one of those that's on the high wall, and
• 32:11
  Speaker 2: then replace the filter. And if that doesn't help, then say, hey, landlord,
• 32:17
  Speaker 2: something's got.
• 32:18
  Speaker 3: Why don't you just ask your landlord to do it?
• 32:19
  Speaker 1: Now?
• 32:21
  Speaker 2: I don't like having to plan the appointments with people
• 32:25
  Speaker 2: that come to my house. There's a lot of issues
• 32:28
  Speaker 2: that need taking care of it the house that I
• 32:30
  Speaker 2: simply refuse to handle because I don't want to have
• 32:34
  Speaker 2: to figure out when can you come? When can I
• 32:36
  Speaker 2: be here? Even though I am home most of the time.
• 32:42
  Speaker 3: It's inconvenient.
• 32:44
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and it's also like I mean, I hope my
• 32:48
  Speaker 2: landlord doesn't listen to this. But there was a there
• 32:51
  Speaker 2: was a light in a closet in the guest bedroom
• 32:56
  Speaker 2: where you pull a string and it goes on and off,
• 32:59
  Speaker 2: and of course the string came out. So then I
• 33:02
  Speaker 2: thought I could replace it if I got on a
• 33:05
  Speaker 2: little ladder and could reach unscrewed the light fixture and
• 33:09
  Speaker 2: pulled it out and then could put that in right. Unfortunately,
• 33:15
  Speaker 2: none of that wasn't true at all, and then I
• 33:19
  Speaker 2: and then I didn't want to deal with the problem
• 33:22
  Speaker 2: I caused, so I simply used duct tape to cover
• 33:25
  Speaker 2: up that hole and so spiders wouldn't come in from
• 33:30
  Speaker 2: the crawl space.
• 33:32
  Speaker 3: So now there's just no light bulb, there's nothing.
• 33:34
  Speaker 2: No, and there's nothing no. Well that's not true. There
• 33:36
  Speaker 2: is stuff in the closet now, but it's just workout equipment.
• 33:40
  Speaker 2: Some of which I do use, but that doesn't need
• 33:42
  Speaker 2: to be lit up. I don't need a light for that.
• 33:44
  Speaker 2: I was using the light before because I was I
• 33:46
  Speaker 2: had the cat litter box in there.
• 33:48
  Speaker 3: Oh sure.
• 33:49
  Speaker 2: But then, and I hate to bad mouth him, but
• 33:52
  Speaker 2: my cat Berry started missing, peeing a little bit on
• 33:56
  Speaker 2: the wall, and then I was like, no, this has
• 34:00
  Speaker 2: got to go in the spare bathroom, in the shower
• 34:03
  Speaker 2: that I don't use.
• 34:04
  Speaker 3: That's smart.
• 34:05
  Speaker 2: And then clean out, you know, soapy hot water on
• 34:10
  Speaker 2: the walls and the floor of that closet. And then
• 34:13
  Speaker 2: I waited a while before I put the exercise equipment
• 34:17
  Speaker 2: in it.
• 34:17
  Speaker 3: It's poor closet.
• 34:20
  Speaker 2: He's been through it, you know.
• 34:22
  Speaker 3: As far as cat litter, I haven't had a cat
• 34:24
  Speaker 3: in a while. But have you tried experimented with different
• 34:27
  Speaker 3: cat litter boxes?
• 34:29
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and it's like I keep trying to get ones
• 34:32
  Speaker 2: big enough with tall enough sides that my cats will
• 34:35
  Speaker 2: never miss, uh huh, And unfortunately they are determined.
• 34:44
  Speaker 3: It's entirely on purpose.
• 34:46
  Speaker 2: Then, well, I think Barry is just this sweet little
• 34:50
  Speaker 2: nerd who doesn't pay attention to what he's doing.
• 34:53
  Speaker 3: Oh sure, he's got other things going on.
• 34:55
  Speaker 2: He's got a lot on his mind, but he but
• 34:58
  Speaker 2: since I've put it in the shower, most of the
• 35:00
  Speaker 2: time he doesn't miss. But when he does, I can
• 35:03
  Speaker 2: just spray the like take the letter box out and
• 35:07
  Speaker 2: vacuum up the dry scattered litter from the stour floor
• 35:13
  Speaker 2: and then spray it with soap dish soapdn Not that
• 35:18
  Speaker 2: I'm promoting that, but I.
• 35:19
  Speaker 3: Made a lot of money from John over the.
• 35:21
  Speaker 2: Years, and then hot water and it's you know, clean.
• 35:27
  Speaker 3: I think that's probably the best solution for if you've
• 35:29
  Speaker 3: got an extra shower bathtub for your cat litter, because
• 35:33
  Speaker 3: it's just to me an eternal problem. Yeah, those robot ones,
• 35:37
  Speaker 3: I think that those probably don't actually work.
• 35:40
  Speaker 2: And I'm afraid that my cats are so contrary that
• 35:45
  Speaker 2: they would figure out a way to either get hurt
• 35:47
  Speaker 2: or killed by the robot.
• 35:49
  Speaker 3: It's very cat final destination.
• 35:51
  Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, I mean, I have heard that things can
• 35:54
  Speaker 2: go horribly wrong, really and they mostly don't. But I can't.
• 36:00
  Speaker 2: I don't even have a bed frame because I'm afraid
• 36:02
  Speaker 2: of the cats being under the bed and the bed
• 36:05
  Speaker 2: falling on them.
• 36:06
  Speaker 3: Right, I think that's a safe I mean, I can
• 36:09
  Speaker 3: imagine that actually happening. And if on the off chance
• 36:13
  Speaker 3: it does, it's happened.
• 36:15
  Speaker 2: Yeah, So better better to sleep with your box spring
• 36:19
  Speaker 2: and mattress on the floor like a college student that
• 36:23
  Speaker 2: no one wants to be.
• 36:25
  Speaker 3: I think that's very cheap.
• 36:29
  Speaker 2: I mean, they do have bed frames now that are
• 36:31
  Speaker 2: closed off get under it, So why not get one
• 36:34
  Speaker 2: of those?
• 36:35
  Speaker 3: One of those?
• 36:36
  Speaker 2: Yeah, with it once we get our gorilla money making machine.
• 36:40
  Speaker 3: Don't act like the down money isn't just rolling in
• 36:44
  Speaker 3: I could.
• 36:44
  Speaker 2: Get I guess I could get it with my don money.
• 36:47
  Speaker 3: Yeah, you could get endless mattresses on the floor.
• 36:50
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 36:51
  Speaker 3: No, I think now I'm starting to wonder about those
• 36:53
  Speaker 3: robot things. What they could possibly do to a cat.
• 36:55
  Speaker 3: I guess I don't want to know.
• 36:57
  Speaker 2: Well, I think that their tail can get trapped in
• 37:00
  Speaker 2: the rake that comes out or something. I don't know.
• 37:04
  Speaker 2: I just it's as much as I love my niece
• 37:08
  Speaker 2: and nephew, and when they were little, I felt like, God,
• 37:12
  Speaker 2: I should have had kids. I love taking care of
• 37:14
  Speaker 2: babies and kids. I do think it's for the best
• 37:17
  Speaker 2: that I didn't, because the way that I worry and
• 37:20
  Speaker 2: I'm overprotective is just four legged family members. And also
• 37:26
  Speaker 2: I can tell as an aunt my niece. At one point,
• 37:28
  Speaker 2: my niece enophew are like, why are you so worried
• 37:32
  Speaker 2: about us getting kidnapped? Why are you always warning us of?
• 37:37
  Speaker 3: Are you going to get.
• 37:40
  Speaker 2: Why is it the worst case scenarios that you're always
• 37:43
  Speaker 2: making sure we're careful of, to the point that at
• 37:47
  Speaker 2: one point I was like.
• 37:49
  Speaker 3: I gotta cool it. Do they live in the area.
• 37:52
  Speaker 2: Yeah, they lived down Well, my niece is away at
• 37:54
  Speaker 2: college now in Riverside, but they live. My brother and
• 38:00
  Speaker 2: nephew still live down in the South Bay.
• 38:02
  Speaker 3: Oh that's lovely.
• 38:03
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 38:03
  Speaker 3: So would you have like a day out with your
• 38:05
  Speaker 3: niece and nephew aunt day.
• 38:08
  Speaker 2: Like when they were little? Yeah, all the time. Oh yeah,
• 38:11
  Speaker 2: it was so fun. They were so fun to just have.
• 38:16
  Speaker 2: They mooned me one time in line at uh with
• 38:21
  Speaker 2: Gardenings one of those giant gardening stores. Not not a
• 38:24
  Speaker 2: Lows but what was.
• 38:26
  Speaker 3: That old one Orchard Supply Hardware.
• 38:28
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I think it's one of those, which is down
• 38:31
  Speaker 2: in Torrents. And it was Super Bowl Sunday and they
• 38:33
  Speaker 2: were they were probably like four and five, and we
• 38:37
  Speaker 2: went there to get something and as I'm paying a
• 38:41
  Speaker 2: look and they're both mooning me. They went through a
• 38:43
  Speaker 2: phase where they mooned people.
• 38:44
  Speaker 3: All the time, incredible as a team, synchronized and no one.
• 38:49
  Speaker 2: Was thank god, no one. No one was around, although
• 38:52
  Speaker 2: I mean who cares. But ultimately it probably seemed like
• 38:56
  Speaker 2: I wasn't taking great care of them that they were
• 38:59
  Speaker 2: like people.
• 39:03
  Speaker 3: Do you still have a good relationship with them? Yeah,
• 39:06
  Speaker 3: they must think you're very cool.
• 39:08
  Speaker 2: I don't think they think I'm cool, but I think
• 39:10
  Speaker 2: that they enjoyed having an aunt who is like I
• 39:14
  Speaker 2: am always on their side. I am never the critical,
• 39:20
  Speaker 2: yelling aunt or like just I adore them, and so
• 39:24
  Speaker 2: I think that they feel very safe and and like
• 39:30
  Speaker 2: they know they're my favorite people.
• 39:31
  Speaker 3: Oh I love that. So I can't imagine getting to
• 39:34
  Speaker 3: the place of being the yelling ant.
• 39:37
  Speaker 2: But that's the sad thing is I mean, I had
• 39:39
  Speaker 2: one mean aunt. Unfortunately we saw a lot of her
• 39:43
  Speaker 2: when I was a kid for a while, and like, yeah,
• 39:47
  Speaker 2: some I've heard from people that they have some aunts
• 39:50
  Speaker 2: that have been like really, maybe just didn't like kids
• 39:53
  Speaker 2: and were like scoldie or critical or whatever.
• 39:57
  Speaker 3: His mistakes are so low as an aunt or uncle
• 39:59
  Speaker 3: where it's like they're not really your responsibility. So you
• 40:02
  Speaker 3: can just have a good time with these children. You
• 40:05
  Speaker 3: don't have to discipline them in any unless they're attacking you. Right.
• 40:09
  Speaker 2: But I just think there are some people who don't
• 40:11
  Speaker 2: like kids. I always suspect it's if you had a
• 40:14
  Speaker 2: traumatic childhood and you shut off your emotions to protect yourself,
• 40:22
  Speaker 2: then kids can really trigger your anger or interesting because
• 40:26
  Speaker 2: it reminds you of being helpless, right, you know, I
• 40:30
  Speaker 2: want to give people the benefit of the doubt that
• 40:32
  Speaker 2: they're not just monsters.
• 40:35
  Speaker 3: I think at this point in history, we've proven that
• 40:36
  Speaker 3: there is a good part of the population that may
• 40:40
  Speaker 3: just be monsters.
• 40:41
  Speaker 2: I mean. The one positive, hopefully thing that I think
• 40:47
  Speaker 2: is coming out of the monsters that are all out
• 40:50
  Speaker 2: in the open now is that there are some very
• 40:56
  Speaker 2: uh well, how can I say this in a politically
• 41:01
  Speaker 2: correct way. There are some religious communities and I won't
• 41:06
  Speaker 2: say denominations, but there are some in the United States
• 41:09
  Speaker 2: that are specific to the United States that their practices
• 41:14
  Speaker 2: in their communities, especially the way they treat kids, they
• 41:17
  Speaker 2: keep it a secret as much as they can. And
• 41:20
  Speaker 2: now it's all coming out because they said we're gonna
• 41:24
  Speaker 2: take over like we're Christian nationalists. Sorry, I did say
• 41:28
  Speaker 2: who they are. We're going to take over everything. We
• 41:31
  Speaker 2: want dominion over everything. Yes, and so it's like, well,
• 41:34
  Speaker 2: then guess what now the spotlight is on all these
• 41:37
  Speaker 2: things that you've been doing that you don't want people
• 41:39
  Speaker 2: to look at.
• 41:39
  Speaker 3: Right, how just straight up terrible you are in so
• 41:42
  Speaker 3: many ways. Yeah, so not the religion that you've think claim.
• 41:46
  Speaker 3: I mean, the whole thing is so bizarre.
• 41:48
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and so I hope that it ends up rescuing
• 41:53
  Speaker 2: kids from from lives that are just full of deliberate
• 41:59
  Speaker 2: cruel in the name of saving their souls. It's heartbreaking,
• 42:04
  Speaker 2: you know.
• 42:05
  Speaker 3: It's a very gracious way of talking about Christian nationalists.
• 42:08
  Speaker 2: I mean, and I guess it's I should don't worry
• 42:10
  Speaker 2: about saying that, because I know there are lots of
• 42:12
  Speaker 2: Christians that are not in that camp.
• 42:15
  Speaker 3: No, of course, a lot of lovely Christians who do
• 42:18
  Speaker 3: what their religion is teaching them.
• 42:21
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 42:22
  Speaker 3: But then there's this particularly nasty new thing.
• 42:26
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and at least one of the architects of it,
• 42:31
  Speaker 2: James Dobson. Thanks thanks be to God, he's no longer
• 42:34
  Speaker 2: with us, but let's get his name out there and
• 42:38
  Speaker 2: enough smear it as much as you can.
• 42:41
  Speaker 3: I just watched this documentary called Marjo. Have you ever
• 42:44
  Speaker 3: heard of this? It's about this former child preacher. Oh,
• 42:48
  Speaker 3: it's amazing. He was like a preacher in the late
• 42:52
  Speaker 3: forties early fifties as a child, Like incredible, he'd be
• 42:55
  Speaker 3: like wow, travel around. And then later, I mean, he
• 42:58
  Speaker 3: was obviously being exploited by his parents and they made
• 43:01
  Speaker 3: millions of dollars off of him, and he kind of
• 43:04
  Speaker 3: later came out of all of that being like, no,
• 43:06
  Speaker 3: this isn't me. But then the documentary is following him
• 43:10
  Speaker 3: while he's going on tour as a preacher, knowing full
• 43:13
  Speaker 3: well what he doesn't believe what he's preaching, and I
• 43:17
  Speaker 3: think part of it, like I think part of it
• 43:19
  Speaker 3: for him is he's like, I'm going to show people
• 43:22
  Speaker 3: that this is all bullshit once this documentary comes out.
• 43:26
  Speaker 3: And also I'm going to make some money that wasn't
• 43:28
  Speaker 3: given to me by my parents who used me as
• 43:30
  Speaker 3: a child employee. But it's so wonderful. It's really fine.
• 43:34
  Speaker 2: And it's called Margo Marjo.
• 43:36
  Speaker 3: He was named after Mary and Joseph Marjo.
• 43:41
  Speaker 2: And what platform can I watch it on?
• 43:44
  Speaker 3: I feel like this was on one of those weird
• 43:45
  Speaker 3: free ones you know to be or something like that.
• 43:50
  Speaker 2: Okay, I'll look it up. I'm embarrassed to just realize
• 43:55
  Speaker 2: I don't watch any of the free stuff. I also
• 43:58
  Speaker 2: don't watch many of the ones I pay for for.
• 44:00
  Speaker 3: Oh my God, of course not.
• 44:02
  Speaker 2: But I don't watch the free stuff because I just
• 44:05
  Speaker 2: have this dumb bias of like it must not be good,
• 44:09
  Speaker 2: but they are good.
• 44:11
  Speaker 3: I think that what they are the good stuff is
• 44:13
  Speaker 3: just kind of forgotten stuff from the past where you know,
• 44:17
  Speaker 3: there's really no money to be made off of it.
• 44:18
  Speaker 3: So this was made in like I think nineteen seventy
• 44:22
  Speaker 3: or something, and I'm just kind of forgotten for such
• 44:23
  Speaker 3: a long time, and then for whatever reason Tooby has
• 44:27
  Speaker 3: decided to put it on their platform or whatever free
• 44:29
  Speaker 3: service this is. So occasionally you go into those things
• 44:32
  Speaker 3: and you find interesting things that are nowhere else, maybe
• 44:35
  Speaker 3: because nobody owns the rights to them. Okay, I don't
• 44:38
  Speaker 3: know what the exact logic is, but it'll be like
• 44:41
  Speaker 3: things that no one else has really thought of, so
• 44:43
  Speaker 3: they'll be interesting.
• 44:46
  Speaker 2: This documentary, the way you described it gave me an idea,
• 44:49
  Speaker 2: and I'm not saying it's the right idea, but money
• 44:53
  Speaker 2: making Milt, you said they made millions. Yes, our gorilla, Oh,
• 44:58
  Speaker 2: here we go.
• 45:01
  Speaker 3: It's such a sign.
• 45:02
  Speaker 2: Language, and he preaches they can learn sign language. Millions
• 45:09
  Speaker 2: raking in the.
• 45:10
  Speaker 3: Dough, seven dead in church as gorilla goes wild. No,
• 45:18
  Speaker 3: I think that that's a path for us.
• 45:20
  Speaker 2: We got to do it last time. I think I
• 45:22
  Speaker 2: did the podcast we were talking about starting a do
• 45:26
  Speaker 2: we talk about starting a podcast about delivering pizzas something?
• 45:30
  Speaker 3: Oh? I think about people who were murdered delivering pizza. Right,
• 45:33
  Speaker 3: that's right, my favorite pizza murder.
• 45:36
  Speaker 2: Although we could also just do on my favorite pizza podcast.
• 45:39
  Speaker 3: Oh, that's not a bad idea and occasionally dip into
• 45:42
  Speaker 3: people who are murdered delivering pizza. That feels like a
• 45:44
  Speaker 3: concept that hasn't been done yet.
• 45:46
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I don't think it has.
• 45:47
  Speaker 3: And neither has my favorite pizza murder. Both of those
• 45:50
  Speaker 3: things one could spin off the other.
• 45:52
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 45:53
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I feel like that pizza delivery people are as
• 45:57
  Speaker 3: you as we spoke about, are in constant day.
• 46:01
  Speaker 2: Yeah, except for I guess people nowadays they have to
• 46:06
  Speaker 2: be using they give their address and they have to
• 46:09
  Speaker 2: use a credit card.
• 46:10
  Speaker 3: Oh interesting maybe, but stolen credit card?
• 46:14
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean I got mugged at knife point delivering pizzas.
• 46:17
  Speaker 2: I think that's why we talked about it.
• 46:19
  Speaker 3: Yes, but that was.
• 46:20
  Speaker 2: In the mid early nineteen nineties, Okay.
• 46:24
  Speaker 3: And that's I had the memory of watching I think
• 46:28
  Speaker 3: unsolved mysteries where a pizza delivery man went to a
• 46:30
  Speaker 3: location and there was no house and then was murdered.
• 46:33
  Speaker 2: Oh god, I don't.
• 46:35
  Speaker 3: Know if that mystery has been solved yet. This was
• 46:37
  Speaker 3: a long time ago. But that couldn't offend the only
• 46:39
  Speaker 3: one of these things.
• 46:41
  Speaker 2: No, And that's what kind of makes me think about
• 46:44
  Speaker 2: people who drive for uber and lyft if they get.
• 46:48
  Speaker 3: Or people in passengers. I mean, the whole system is
• 46:53
  Speaker 3: just ready for people to murder each other.
• 46:55
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and I mean in some ways we should give
• 46:58
  Speaker 2: ourselves credit as a species that more of us aren't
• 47:02
  Speaker 2: murdering each other. Yeah, that's a good You know, a
• 47:05
  Speaker 2: lot of us simply choose not to murder each other.
• 47:07
  Speaker 3: It's just those other ones are getting the headlines.
• 47:09
  Speaker 2: Yeah, they get all the attention, and they sometimes they
• 47:12
  Speaker 2: get a lot of money.
• 47:13
  Speaker 3: Right. Yeah, I think that we need to talk about
• 47:16
  Speaker 3: all the people who aren't murdering each other doing horrible
• 47:19
  Speaker 3: things more often.
• 47:20
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean, the truth is, nobody wants to hear
• 47:23
  Speaker 2: it right.
• 47:23
  Speaker 3: It's really boring. Get it off my feed. I don't
• 47:28
  Speaker 3: need positivity. I want to see murder.
• 47:30
  Speaker 2: I don't want to hear the feel good story.
• 47:33
  Speaker 3: No, no, no, I don't want to learn about a
• 47:35
  Speaker 3: gorilla teaching people about Christ. No, thank you.
• 47:41
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 47:42
  Speaker 3: Have you been in a Weimo yet?
• 47:44
  Speaker 2: Never? And I'll never trust those sons of bitches. I
• 47:48
  Speaker 2: feel so lovingly protective of the little robots that deliver
• 47:54
  Speaker 2: stuff on the street.
• 47:55
  Speaker 3: I just someone get hit by a train.
• 47:58
  Speaker 2: Those little guys I have a name, I can't remember
• 48:01
  Speaker 2: what it is, but I love them. But the seething
• 48:06
  Speaker 2: rage I feel when I see a way moo.
• 48:08
  Speaker 3: This is how I felt. And I'm not trying to
• 48:11
  Speaker 3: be a Weymo evangelist, but there's some logic that's starting
• 48:16
  Speaker 3: to make sense to me of why am I allowed
• 48:19
  Speaker 3: to drive? I none of us should probably be allowed
• 48:22
  Speaker 3: to drive. I A friend was really loves them. She
• 48:25
  Speaker 3: goes all over the place in these things now, and
• 48:27
  Speaker 3: so she took a few of us in one and
• 48:30
  Speaker 3: I was like, oh, this is if everyone was in
• 48:32
  Speaker 3: one of these, this would make way more sense than
• 48:35
  Speaker 3: bridge or wineger driving down the freeway because they're just
• 48:41
  Speaker 3: they're more efficient and they're not selfish.
• 48:44
  Speaker 2: True, Yeah, you're right about that.
• 48:46
  Speaker 3: So I think I don't know what I mean. Of course,
• 48:49
  Speaker 3: like anything with tech, it's like, what horrible thing is
• 48:51
  Speaker 3: going to be exposed about this? But there is something
• 48:55
  Speaker 3: where it feels like there is a chance in twenty
• 48:58
  Speaker 3: years people would be like, Oh, I can't believe we
• 49:00
  Speaker 3: used to drive cars. We're so safe now in these Yeah,
• 49:03
  Speaker 3: things that feel kind of like being in a trolley
• 49:06
  Speaker 3: or something.
• 49:07
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that does make sense. I will say my gut
• 49:11
  Speaker 2: reaction is the same as the boomer people who are like,
• 49:20
  Speaker 2: we didn't need to talk about our feelings when we
• 49:22
  Speaker 2: were young. They're distrust of therapy, even though it's been
• 49:27
  Speaker 2: proven to be highly helpful for people, even though I
• 49:30
  Speaker 2: can see, yes, everything you're saying sounds good, but I'm like,
• 49:34
  Speaker 2: I don't trust them.
• 49:35
  Speaker 3: And I think you have every right not to trust them. Okay,
• 49:38
  Speaker 3: because again, every piece of tech we've ever used at
• 49:41
  Speaker 3: this point, at least in the last twenty years, has
• 49:44
  Speaker 3: just proven to be some sort of data gathering service
• 49:47
  Speaker 3: or evil plan. Yeah, this is a fun conversation.
• 49:57
  Speaker 2: I just I mean, there's a part of me that's like,
• 49:59
  Speaker 2: but there are good things that have come of it.
• 50:03
  Speaker 2: It's just we have not so far regulated and protected
• 50:08
  Speaker 2: against the nefarious stuff.
• 50:10
  Speaker 3: Right, Someone's got to step in and regulate.
• 50:13
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and the and the we got to have a
• 50:15
  Speaker 2: propaganda network like Fox News that has convinced people regulation
• 50:20
  Speaker 2: is bad when it's why we have clean water and stuff.
• 50:26
  Speaker 2: You know, why there's a five day work week and
• 50:30
  Speaker 2: safety at work, regulations and rules.
• 50:33
  Speaker 3: And people forget that those things didn't always exist and
• 50:37
  Speaker 3: then you could die of diphtheria or something because the
• 50:42
  Speaker 3: water was filthy.
• 50:43
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and they and and Fox has convinced people like
• 50:47
  Speaker 2: I don't need regular I don't need the government regulating
• 50:50
  Speaker 2: things for me, just trying to tell me what to do,
• 50:52
  Speaker 2: Like they're somebody getting thrown out of a bar fight
• 50:56
  Speaker 2: now fighting it. Yeah, yeah, but we got I feel
• 51:01
  Speaker 2: like an investment group of wealthy, reasonable people. I don't know,
• 51:11
  Speaker 2: but I know they're out there. I just think they
• 51:13
  Speaker 2: haven't come together to form a conglomerate that can start
• 51:18
  Speaker 2: buying up and creating new media that could be as
• 51:21
  Speaker 2: powerful as the ones that are currently being controlled and monopolized.
• 51:26
  Speaker 3: Again with the horrible headlines. Yeah, Foxes. I mean that's
• 51:31
  Speaker 3: their entire brand.
• 51:33
  Speaker 2: But we at this point, we have plenty of material
• 51:36
  Speaker 2: to have horrible headlines.
• 51:38
  Speaker 3: About other things.
• 51:40
  Speaker 2: Stuff and bring light to it and get people motivated
• 51:43
  Speaker 2: to I mean, I talk about all this stuff, but
• 51:47
  Speaker 2: I don't know what works. I didn't even graduate college,
• 51:50
  Speaker 2: and I was an English major.
• 51:53
  Speaker 3: I was an English major as well, and barely graduated
• 51:56
  Speaker 3: from college.
• 51:57
  Speaker 2: I've still got two classes to go.
• 51:58
  Speaker 3: Bridger, we're thought leaders, or ultimately two thought leaders. Well,
• 52:05
  Speaker 3: I think we should play a game.
• 52:07
  Speaker 2: Okay, I love it.
• 52:08
  Speaker 3: We're going to play a game called Gift to a Curse.
• 52:09
  Speaker 3: But I need a number between one and ten from
• 52:11
  Speaker 3: you four. Okay. I have to do some light calculating
• 52:15
  Speaker 3: to get our game pieces. So right now, you can recommend, promote,
• 52:20
  Speaker 3: do whatever you want.
• 52:21
  Speaker 2: Okay, I will just promote. Euphoria Season three is coming
• 52:27
  Speaker 2: out on April twelfth. It's on HBO Max. Go ahead
• 52:32
  Speaker 2: and watch it if you'd like to. I will be
• 52:35
  Speaker 2: I love it. I'm a big fan of the show.
• 52:38
  Speaker 2: I am in it. But that don't let that deter
• 52:42
  Speaker 2: you from watching the show.
• 52:43
  Speaker 3: Please.
• 52:44
  Speaker 2: It's everybody but me is a gifted actor on that show.
• 52:48
  Speaker 2: And also all of the ones that I've met. There's
• 52:52
  Speaker 2: a bunch of cast I haven't met, but the ones
• 52:54
  Speaker 2: that I've met, I just love really sweet, warm people.
• 53:00
  Speaker 3: You know, people love you on that show. You're like
• 53:02
  Speaker 3: an icon on that show, right, I feel like it's
• 53:06
  Speaker 3: like you, people adore you from it.
• 53:08
  Speaker 2: I think that there is a faction of gen Z
• 53:11
  Speaker 2: Euphoria fans that definitely are the bulk of my followers
• 53:15
  Speaker 2: on TikTok. But I I'm not a like large large
• 53:21
  Speaker 2: account on TikTok, so I wouldn't say icon.
• 53:24
  Speaker 3: I think so.
• 53:26
  Speaker 2: I mean, I appreciate it. You can say it, Okay,
• 53:28
  Speaker 2: thank you for giving me.
• 53:32
  Speaker 3: Go off icon. That's a sentence like just I'm not
• 53:37
  Speaker 3: capable of actually saying okay, Yeah, everybody go watch Euphoria.
• 53:45
  Speaker 3: Follow Martha on TikTok. It's one of It's just a salve.
• 53:50
  Speaker 3: I mean, it's just such a lovely thing to find
• 53:52
  Speaker 3: on that service.
• 53:53
  Speaker 2: Thank you, bridgerd It's Martha Kelly. Tic tac is my
• 53:57
  Speaker 2: right just for anyone who wants to follow.
• 54:01
  Speaker 3: Do I have anything to recommend? I feel like I
• 54:03
  Speaker 3: haven't recommended anything on this I recommended the documentary mar
• 54:06
  Speaker 3: Joe Our friends the Rat Boys have a new album
• 54:11
  Speaker 3: that is I've listened to one hundred times in the
• 54:13
  Speaker 3: last two months. Everybody go find that love it. I
• 54:16
  Speaker 3: think that's good. Two things, two pieces of media. Okay,
• 54:19
  Speaker 3: this is how we play Gift or a Curse. I'm
• 54:21
  Speaker 3: going to name three things. You'll tell me if there
• 54:23
  Speaker 3: are a gift or a curse, and why I'll tell
• 54:26
  Speaker 3: you if you're right or wrong.
• 54:27
  Speaker 2: Okay, all right.
• 54:28
  Speaker 3: The first these are all from our Patreon listeners today.
• 54:30
  Speaker 3: This is from Antonia. Gift or a Curse. Weird non
• 54:34
  Speaker 3: happy birthday songs at restaurants that the staff are forced
• 54:37
  Speaker 3: to sing at you.
• 54:39
  Speaker 2: Hmmmm, curse? Why because the I'm mortified when people sing
• 54:52
  Speaker 2: happy Birthday to me at a restaurant, and I was
• 54:54
  Speaker 2: I waited tables for many years, and I having being
• 54:59
  Speaker 2: forced to sing happy birds, just being forced to sing
• 55:02
  Speaker 2: for strangers. I don't think anyone's enjoying it, except that
• 55:07
  Speaker 2: part of the population that likes embarrassing their friends and
• 55:10
  Speaker 2: family by getting them to be sung to. That's my feeling, wrong, wrong, Okay,
• 55:17
  Speaker 2: I'm on the side of songwriters.
• 55:20
  Speaker 3: I think that this is a fertile place for songwriting
• 55:25
  Speaker 3: if we have the happy Birthday song. But I think
• 55:27
  Speaker 3: you know whoever's working over at Chile's who's got this
• 55:30
  Speaker 3: itch to write a new song. Let them write the
• 55:33
  Speaker 3: happy Birthday song and then teach it to the employees
• 55:35
  Speaker 3: who will then hate it for the rest of their lives.
• 55:40
  Speaker 2: I guess I can see your point. Yeah, I see you.
• 55:45
  Speaker 3: Okay, thank you for accepting that, all right? This next
• 55:48
  Speaker 3: one is from Marina or Marina or Marina Marina. Those
• 55:53
  Speaker 3: are probably the three options. Gift or a curse. People
• 55:56
  Speaker 3: with the profile picture of their small children who stir
• 55:59
  Speaker 3: the online.
• 56:01
  Speaker 2: Wow, I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go in an unexpected direction.
• 56:07
  Speaker 2: I'm gonna say gift because because people love having someone
• 56:11
  Speaker 2: to be mad at on the internet, and I'm including
• 56:14
  Speaker 2: myself in that. Just the It's a short lived enjoyment
• 56:19
  Speaker 2: followed by guilt and shame of being happy that someone's
• 56:25
  Speaker 2: being ganged up on. But when you first log on
• 56:28
  Speaker 2: and you see that someone has said something terrible to
• 56:32
  Speaker 2: stir the pot, and everyone is coming together as a
• 56:36
  Speaker 2: community to tell them they're wrong and terrible, there's a
• 56:40
  Speaker 2: thrill and a sense of being part of something, right,
• 56:43
  Speaker 2: So I say it's a gift.
• 56:45
  Speaker 3: Correct, This is a gift. Okay, this in particular a
• 56:48
  Speaker 3: person with if their profile picture is not them and
• 56:51
  Speaker 3: they're using their own children as their profile picture, it
• 56:53
  Speaker 3: really says to me, this person's the worst of the worst. Yeah,
• 56:56
  Speaker 3: because they're hiding behind their children. Yeah, and we're all
• 57:00
  Speaker 3: able to now just gang up and go absolutely wild
• 57:04
  Speaker 3: on this person. I think it's an absolute gift. Finally,
• 57:09
  Speaker 3: this is from Andrea gift, You're a curse attending a
• 57:12
  Speaker 3: baseball game.
• 57:15
  Speaker 2: I gotta go with gift. Dodger dogs. I haven't been
• 57:19
  Speaker 2: in years, but the way I remember how delicious a
• 57:23
  Speaker 2: Dodger dog was. I don't haven't drank in years, but
• 57:27
  Speaker 2: the fact that you can drink and get a hot dog, popcorn.
• 57:31
  Speaker 2: People come through the stands with these delicious food items.
• 57:35
  Speaker 2: You even have to get up, and it's a long
• 57:39
  Speaker 2: you know, nine inning things, and there's a seventh inning stretch,
• 57:44
  Speaker 2: so there's plenty of time to goof off. And it's
• 57:48
  Speaker 2: a low st if it's not the World Series, who
• 57:51
  Speaker 2: cares who wins? So if you're bored, you can't leave.
• 57:55
  Speaker 2: There's plenty of time to not feel bad. Because it's
• 57:58
  Speaker 2: so long, you don't feel bad if you leave early.
• 58:00
  Speaker 3: I guess correct, Gift. I mean, I think you kind
• 58:03
  Speaker 3: of just explained my entire feeling about that. You know,
• 58:06
  Speaker 3: I don't really care to go to any sports event,
• 58:09
  Speaker 3: but this one is more. It's almost like going to
• 58:11
  Speaker 3: them all. You're just going to hang out whatever's happening
• 58:14
  Speaker 3: down there. I'm glad it's not interesting, right, because then
• 58:17
  Speaker 3: we can just talk to each other, have our hot dog,
• 58:19
  Speaker 3: and again, nothing better than leaving something.
• 58:22
  Speaker 2: Early, right, Yeah, what a thrill.
• 58:25
  Speaker 3: Just check out when you're done. Yeah, no stakes at all.
• 58:28
  Speaker 3: Goodbye baseball. You've had a lovely evening outside, Yeah, among
• 58:33
  Speaker 3: strangers and friends and no bad feelings at all.
• 58:37
  Speaker 2: Yeah, And you could, even if you had money to burn,
• 58:41
  Speaker 2: you might even go to Dodger Stadium just for a
• 58:45
  Speaker 2: place to get a good hot dog. Like you're going
• 58:46
  Speaker 2: to an expensive restaurant.
• 58:48
  Speaker 3: Consider it a restaurant.
• 58:49
  Speaker 2: Yeah, just go for the meal and a couple of
• 58:52
  Speaker 2: beers or cokes whatever, right.
• 58:54
  Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, just consider it a restaurant. My only concern
• 58:58
  Speaker 3: with Dodgers Stadium, this is probably a problem with every stadium,
• 59:01
  Speaker 3: is parking. Yeah, I see the people driving into that
• 59:03
  Speaker 3: parking lot and I panic. I think I would need
• 59:05
  Speaker 3: to be helicoptered in or something.
• 59:07
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it doesn't. I haven't been to anything any any
• 59:11
  Speaker 2: kind of place like that in years. Like I can't
• 59:13
  Speaker 2: remember the last concert I went to. But yeah, stuff
• 59:17
  Speaker 2: like that it does create a lot of panic.
• 59:20
  Speaker 3: Right, You strike me as a concert goer.
• 59:23
  Speaker 2: When I was younger, I was. But the last oh so,
• 59:27
  Speaker 2: the last concert I went to was in Dayton, Ohio,
• 59:30
  Speaker 2: and it was with It was to see the Scorpions
• 59:34
  Speaker 2: and White Snake opened for them.
• 59:36
  Speaker 3: Oh my god.
• 59:37
  Speaker 2: It was in two thousand and three and it was
• 59:43
  Speaker 2: a comedian I was friends with was doing the Dayton
• 59:45
  Speaker 2: Comedy Club and they had press box tickets to this
• 59:51
  Speaker 2: or whatever it's called for to sit for the concert.
• 59:54
  Speaker 2: And we got to go and like get drunk and high,
• 59:58
  Speaker 2: because that was I got sober at the end of
• 1:00:00
  Speaker 2: that year, but get drunken high. One of the radio
• 1:00:03
  Speaker 2: guys said, do you want to meet the Scorpions? You
• 1:00:06
  Speaker 2: want to go to their tour bus?
• 1:00:07
  Speaker 3: Of course, oh, incredit fault. Did you meet the Scorpions?
• 1:00:10
  Speaker 2: No, security prevented us from even going in that direction.
• 1:00:14
  Speaker 2: And then he and then the radio guy was like, well,
• 1:00:17
  Speaker 2: they don't know. I'm friends with them, they don't know.
• 1:00:19
  Speaker 2: We'll just go around this way. Went around, like, walked
• 1:00:22
  Speaker 2: around the venue to where the and that same security
• 1:00:27
  Speaker 2: guard stopped us and said, I thought I told you.
• 1:00:33
  Speaker 2: And me and my friend Andy, who's the comedian I
• 1:00:35
  Speaker 2: went with, we were so high and it was so
• 1:00:38
  Speaker 2: hard not to burst out laughing. But it was embarrassing for.
• 1:00:41
  Speaker 3: The radio guy, of course, but a loser.
• 1:00:44
  Speaker 2: It was funny that he was trying to impress us
• 1:00:46
  Speaker 2: with being I can get you on the tour bus
• 1:00:48
  Speaker 2: and then like.
• 1:00:49
  Speaker 3: Not even close.
• 1:00:51
  Speaker 2: Not only that, but you got scolded in front of us.
• 1:00:56
  Speaker 3: Oh okay, you got two out of three on the game.
• 1:00:59
  Speaker 3: That's pretty good, not bad at all. We hope me
• 1:01:02
  Speaker 3: answer listener a question. Sure, all right, people are writing
• 1:01:05
  Speaker 3: into I said no gifts at shemail dot com, begging
• 1:01:08
  Speaker 3: for answers. Let's get into this. This is high bridger.
• 1:01:11
  Speaker 3: They don't even mention you. I have a gift related
• 1:01:13
  Speaker 3: question for you. I'm having trouble finding suitable gifts for
• 1:01:16
  Speaker 3: my fiance's mom. My fiance insists that she doesn't like
• 1:01:20
  Speaker 3: soap candles or any self care gifts like that. Instead,
• 1:01:24
  Speaker 3: he always suggests something random to get her, like a
• 1:01:27
  Speaker 3: plant stand, but there are only so many plant stands
• 1:01:30
  Speaker 3: one can give. My question is what are the other
• 1:01:33
  Speaker 3: gifts I can get this woman. I'm also wondering if
• 1:01:35
  Speaker 3: the reason why my fiance assumes she doesn't want any
• 1:01:37
  Speaker 3: self care gifts is because neither he nor his brother
• 1:01:40
  Speaker 3: have ever asked. They are also an immigrant Indian family,
• 1:01:44
  Speaker 3: if that matters, which I think it does. And I'm
• 1:01:47
  Speaker 3: fully bright white, okay, bringing race into it, I digress.
• 1:01:51
  Speaker 3: But all I know is I want to get her
• 1:01:53
  Speaker 3: something nice for her to pamper herself. What do I
• 1:01:55
  Speaker 3: do here? And that's from CD?
• 1:01:58
  Speaker 2: Is it possible to ask them mother in law.
• 1:02:01
  Speaker 3: Right start forging a relationship with this person? Or do
• 1:02:04
  Speaker 3: we want to keep her at arm's length? Is that
• 1:02:06
  Speaker 3: what this plan for this person is. She's trying to
• 1:02:09
  Speaker 3: kind of fracture the family.
• 1:02:12
  Speaker 2: She's trying to cause division, right, ultimately hoping to get
• 1:02:17
  Speaker 2: her husband to go no contact.
• 1:02:23
  Speaker 3: Hmm.
• 1:02:25
  Speaker 2: I mean, yeah, that's tough. If people don't tell you
• 1:02:29
  Speaker 2: what they like, or their close relatives don't, that is tough.
• 1:02:33
  Speaker 2: But I guess I would have to ask her like
• 1:02:36
  Speaker 2: well before the holidays or a birthday, like, hey, what
• 1:02:41
  Speaker 2: what would you like for your birthday? Or what would
• 1:02:43
  Speaker 2: you like for Christmas?
• 1:02:45
  Speaker 3: I think that this another way to learn about the
• 1:02:47
  Speaker 3: mom is start start taking shots in the dark. She
• 1:02:49
  Speaker 3: doesn't like them.
• 1:02:50
  Speaker 2: You're learning about her, right, That's that's true too.
• 1:02:52
  Speaker 3: And take some big swings.
• 1:02:54
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Everybody gets gifts that they're never going to use
• 1:02:58
  Speaker 2: and didn't want and what like you, it's right if
• 1:03:02
  Speaker 2: they don't like it, So what then you know for
• 1:03:05
  Speaker 2: next time?
• 1:03:05
  Speaker 3: Right, you won't get that item again.
• 1:03:07
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:03:08
  Speaker 3: And you've got hopefully the rest of this woman's life
• 1:03:12
  Speaker 3: to get her bad gifts. Yeah, and once you do
• 1:03:16
  Speaker 3: land on one, you're both going to be so happy, right.
• 1:03:20
  Speaker 3: I mean, this is all again, assuming that there isn't
• 1:03:22
  Speaker 3: some other ulterior motive. She has mentioned that neither the
• 1:03:25
  Speaker 3: brother nor the fiance care about the mom. I don't
• 1:03:30
  Speaker 3: even know if she cares about the mom. I really
• 1:03:33
  Speaker 3: don't know what to even tell this person.
• 1:03:35
  Speaker 2: I mean, and I'm trying to figure out should I
• 1:03:37
  Speaker 2: be mad at the husband and the fiance and his
• 1:03:40
  Speaker 2: brother for being terrible sons bad sons? Or is the
• 1:03:43
  Speaker 2: mother a mean mom and that's why they don't.
• 1:03:46
  Speaker 3: Care right, Oh yeah, there are how many people here?
• 1:03:52
  Speaker 3: That four different people? That could be horrible. Yeah, I'm
• 1:03:55
  Speaker 3: assuming it's the person who wrote into the podcast CD
• 1:03:59
  Speaker 3: don't write well. We answered the question perfectly.
• 1:04:04
  Speaker 2: I think we did. I really thought your answer was
• 1:04:06
  Speaker 2: the right one.
• 1:04:07
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I think so. And look at this cute little
• 1:04:11
  Speaker 3: picture I've got. Now, I think this is going to
• 1:04:13
  Speaker 3: go up and here. We've got to find a nice place.
• 1:04:15
  Speaker 3: This is getting a little crowded. I've said this before,
• 1:04:18
  Speaker 3: but it's starting to feel like Grandma's house that you
• 1:04:20
  Speaker 3: don't want to visit. But right maybe over by that
• 1:04:23
  Speaker 3: little cruise sign, let's see.
• 1:04:26
  Speaker 2: I love it.
• 1:04:26
  Speaker 3: It's like could go, We'll find a place. It's just
• 1:04:28
  Speaker 3: so adorable. I wonder if it could even just go
• 1:04:31
  Speaker 3: like here, look at that. I love you to figure
• 1:04:35
  Speaker 3: it out.
• 1:04:36
  Speaker 2: You've got so many great gifts.
• 1:04:38
  Speaker 3: I've gotten a lot of objects. I love them, all
• 1:04:42
  Speaker 3: sorts of things that can be used as decor at
• 1:04:46
  Speaker 3: the very least, they're great.
• 1:04:50
  Speaker 2: It is a muddle. I mean it is a magnet.
• 1:04:52
  Speaker 2: You could attach it to. If this is muddal you
• 1:04:54
  Speaker 2: could attach.
• 1:04:55
  Speaker 3: Yeah, there's got to be some sort of metal up there.
• 1:04:58
  Speaker 3: I don't know we'll find it. Martha. I'm so glad
• 1:05:02
  Speaker 3: you could do the podcast.
• 1:05:03
  Speaker 2: Me too.
• 1:05:04
  Speaker 3: It's a thrilled to see you.
• 1:05:05
  Speaker 2: It was a thrill to see you as well, and
• 1:05:07
  Speaker 2: I can't wait for us to make millions off that grill.
• 1:05:10
  Speaker 3: No, we'll get started today. Okay, I'll start the custody
• 1:05:13
  Speaker 3: battle asap. Listener, the podcast is over. We're just releasing
• 1:05:19
  Speaker 3: you into the wild. Go do your thing. I love
• 1:05:22
  Speaker 3: when you do your thing. I love you, goodbye, I said,
• 1:05:29
  Speaker 3: No Gifts is an exactly right production. Our senior producer
• 1:05:34
  Speaker 3: is Ellis Nelson, and our episodes are beautifully mixed by
• 1:05:37
  Speaker 3: Ben Holliday. The theme song is by miracle worker Amy Mann,
• 1:05:42
  Speaker 3: and we couldn't do it without our booker, Patrick Coottner.
• 1:05:45
  Speaker 3: You must follow the show on Instagram, and I said,
• 1:05:48
  Speaker 3: No Gifts, that's where you're going to see pictures of
• 1:05:50
  Speaker 3: all these wonderful gifts I'm getting. And don't you want
• 1:05:53
  Speaker 3: to see the gifts?
• 1:05:56
  Speaker 1: Did you?
• 1:05:57
  Speaker 2: Here?
• 1:06:00
  Speaker 1: Thought? I made myself perfectly clear. But you're I guess
• 1:06:05
  Speaker 1: to my home. You gotta come to me empty And
• 1:06:12
  Speaker 1: I said, no, guess, You're own presences presents enough I
• 1:06:18
  Speaker 1: already had too much stuff, So how do you dare
• 1:06:23
  Speaker 1: to surbey me?