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62. When Certainty Collapses: Meaning, Myth & the Healing Path with Kristina Dryža · Constellations and all that...

• 0:00
  Tracy Cartwright: And welcome to Constellations and all that.
• 0:02
  Tracy Cartwright: I'm your host, Tracy Cartwright, and together we will be exploring the world of family constellations with facilitators for and clients from around the world, looking at different perspectives and experiences in the work, having a cup of tea, and just chatting with some friends around their experiences in constellations.
• 0:20
  Tracy Cartwright: We'd love for you to join us.
• 0:22
  Tracy Cartwright: I hope that you enjoy this series as much as I have loved making it.
• 0:30
  Tracy Cartwright: Kiata everyone, and welcome to Constellations and all that Today I, um, had the pleasure of sitting here with a beautiful cup of cacao and chatting with my friend Kristina Drea.
• 0:40
  Tracy Cartwright: Welcome, Kristina.
• 0:42
  Kristina Dryža: Welcome from, uh, I'm in Adelaide, so I have some really warm greetings, uh, and warm weather wherever people are in the world at the moment.
• 0:49
  Kristina Dryža: Oh,
• 0:51
  Tracy Cartwright: so good to have you here.
• 0:52
  Tracy Cartwright: And you're not often in Adelaide, are you?
• 0:54
  Kristina Dryža: That's correct, yeah.
• 0:55
  Kristina Dryža: I'm mainly, mostly, uh, in the Northern Hemisphere.
• 0:57
  Kristina Dryža: Yeah.
• 0:58
  Tracy Cartwright: Beautiful.
• 0:59
  Tracy Cartwright: Can you, I'm gonna invite you to please share a little bit about yourself so that the listeners and the viewers have a taste of who you are and,
• 1:07
  Kristina Dryža: oh, yeah.
• 1:08
  Kristina Dryža: Myself.
• 1:08
  Kristina Dryža: Yeah.
• 1:08
  Kristina Dryža: I would, I would say that I am.
• 1:11
  Kristina Dryža: A lover of having a different perspective or a different way of interpreting life.
• 1:16
  Kristina Dryža: And the lens that I really like to use is the lens of archetypes and mythology.
• 1:21
  Kristina Dryža: So I'm really interested in helping, um, people develop an archetypal eye or a mythical consciousness or symbolic side, or more poetic imagination.
• 1:32
  Kristina Dryža: And just really simply, what that I would say is that, um, how to bring a greater depth or meaning to life.
• 1:38
  Kristina Dryža: Through, instead of just interpreting events as just pure facts, um, that they might be part of a bigger, of a, a larger story, part of a larger story.
• 1:46
  Tracy Cartwright: That's fascinating.
• 1:47
  Tracy Cartwright: Sorry, can you, can you give us a little example of that?
• 1:51
  Kristina Dryža: Yeah.
• 1:51
  Kristina Dryža: I mean, sure.
• 1:52
  Kristina Dryža: I, if we just even say, 'cause people might say in our language and if people are interested in this, I, I did a, a TEDx on y archetypes and, um, mythology matter even more so today because when we hear the word myth, we might hear it as like.
• 2:05
  Kristina Dryža: Uh, 10, um, health busting myths, like, you know, or the 10 myths in dating, like, so we've equated myth to be a lie when actually it's almost the most tourist thing that actually exists.
• 2:16
  Kristina Dryža: So for me, myths are really meaningful stories that just help us understand who we are and how we live.
• 2:22
  Kristina Dryža: It's that almost the ancient storehouse warehouse, really, of what it means to be human.
• 2:26
  Kristina Dryža: And I find these, uh, myths can be really maps of meaning that can usually help us through transformational, difficult times.
• 2:33
  Kristina Dryža: And.
• 2:33
  Kristina Dryža: I think they give us permission to see pain as meaningful and not pathological.
• 2:39
  Kristina Dryža: Uh, that's a really, really big part.
• 2:41
  Kristina Dryža: So if you think of like a story, like, um, we've all had times when the rug got pulled out from underneath us, right?
• 2:46
  Kristina Dryža: Uh, but it's not.
• 2:49
  Kristina Dryža: That in a way, uh, it's being done to us.
• 2:52
  Kristina Dryža: If we can sometimes say that rug pulling, universal rug pulling experience where we have, whether it's a, a betrayal or a divorce or an illness or something like that, it's almost in a sense that experience occurs, uh, whenever certainty collapses.
• 3:07
  Kristina Dryža: And then it becomes an invitation then, like, how do I develop my relationship with the unknown?
• 3:14
  Kristina Dryža: Um, and almost in a way the receptivity to the unknown.
• 3:18
  Kristina Dryža: So it was almost either I thought I'd have this type of future, or I'd be here or X, y, z or something like that.
• 3:24
  Kristina Dryža: That almost in a sense that so much when we look at, say, sacrifice, that occurs in, in these dissent processes, it's more about reordering value.
• 3:33
  Kristina Dryža: And so it's another way that we can see what we value and almost in a sense the value of ourselves through going through an experience that really strips us bare, that anything that's on the periphery just kind of doesn't exist.
• 3:45
  Kristina Dryža: There's a rawness and a realness and it's really more about the directness of it, the experience, not the narrative or the would've, could've, should've, that goes around it.
• 3:55
  Tracy Cartwright: We can get really stuck in that, can't we?
• 3:56
  Tracy Cartwright: Like it's like.
• 3:57
  Kristina Dryža: Hugely.
• 3:58
  Kristina Dryža: And people might just be saying, okay, well what's an archetype, right?
• 4:00
  Kristina Dryža: Like, it's not what's an archetype, it's just like a pattern.
• 4:02
  Kristina Dryža: If you just think, when I mention the word archetype, just substitute it for pattern.
• 4:06
  Kristina Dryža: They're just ancient patterns that shape human emotion and behavior and imagination, and they're just recurring energy.
• 4:13
  Kristina Dryža: So, um, being lost in the forest, that's an archetype.
• 4:16
  Kristina Dryža: Um, you know, seeing, uh, you know, um, someone in there.
• 4:20
  Kristina Dryža: Authority.
• 4:21
  Kristina Dryža: Um, you know, it might, it might be a queen or kind of might be a leader, or it might be like a, a shaman or a trickster.
• 4:27
  Kristina Dryža: So almost in a sense, um, not stereotypes, but actually patterns that contain both a shadow and a light.
• 4:34
  Kristina Dryža: We could say, um, some people might even say whether it's a negative or a positive or a, a challenge or a grace or, uh, destructive or constructive.
• 4:42
  Kristina Dryža: Um, but just recognizing that, like Carl Yung said, um, you can either be good or whole, but not both.
• 4:49
  Kristina Dryža: And so it's the wholeness, right?
• 4:51
  Kristina Dryža: Where there's also the shadow experience as much as the light.
• 4:55
  Tracy Cartwright: Yeah.
• 4:56
  Tracy Cartwright: Wow.
• 4:56
  Tracy Cartwright: I'm, I'm gonna come back to just sharing a little bit more about you because you, um, you are a writer.
• 5:02
  Kristina Dryža: Mm. Yeah.
• 5:04
  Kristina Dryža: Yeah.
• 5:04
  Tracy Cartwright: What else?
• 5:04
  Tracy Cartwright: What else have you got?
• 5:05
  Tracy Cartwright: Oh,
• 5:05
  Kristina Dryža: yeah, gosh.
• 5:06
  Kristina Dryža: Okay.
• 5:06
  Kristina Dryža: So, yeah, so.
• 5:07
  Kristina Dryža: I guess people go, well, how do you get into something like this?
• 5:09
  Kristina Dryža: You know?
• 5:10
  Kristina Dryža: So I would say from a very young age, I was really fascinated by, um, is this fate or is this destiny?
• 5:16
  Kristina Dryža: Is this free will?
• 5:18
  Kristina Dryža: Do we have free will or is everything predetermined?
• 5:20
  Kristina Dryža: Because I was trying to work out in my own life, is, is it like, where's my, do I have choice or is it all just written out and I just have to live into it?
• 5:29
  Kristina Dryža: And, and that was, um, that led me to be, you know, having a career of a futurist.
• 5:34
  Kristina Dryža: But it really came out of, um, in my anthropology course at university, um, we had, uh, one semester on indigenous cosmology where they were able to see all timers, one past, present, and futures, one and cyclical instead of our linear, past, present, and future.
• 5:49
  Kristina Dryža: And that was where I, I guess, started some of these ideas of more.
• 5:54
  Kristina Dryža: Like at the world at the moment, if we look, the world is very, um, binary.
• 5:58
  Kristina Dryža: It's very like we're both at extreme ends of the polls, whether it's political or whatever it actually is.
• 6:03
  Kristina Dryža: So it's not this either the arts or the sciences.
• 6:06
  Kristina Dryža: It's like both the arts and the sciences.
• 6:09
  Kristina Dryža: And I think through that exploration of a different relationship to time and to an uh, I always say I never trust anyone that talks about the future, that doesn't reference the patterns of the collective unconscious or the patterns in nature.
• 6:20
  Kristina Dryža: Um, it's, it's just a huge part of my work.
• 6:23
  Kristina Dryža: Um, it was that I saw that it wasn't either fate or destiny, that it was both fate and destiny.
• 6:30
  Kristina Dryža: And I think all of us have had experiences where.
• 6:33
  Kristina Dryža: That accident or meeting that person was written in the stars, there was no way we were gonna avoid it.
• 6:37
  Kristina Dryža: And there's other experiences where it's actually, Ooh, I, I do have my hand on the wheel, right?
• 6:41
  Kristina Dryža: I, I do have agency here, but what we so often do is where we have agency, we say we don't, and I'd say that's, climate change is a really big one at the moment.
• 6:49
  Kristina Dryža: And where we, where it's written and we have no involvement.
• 6:52
  Kristina Dryža: We're trying to get our sticky hands in it.
• 6:54
  Kristina Dryža: So someone that leaves us no, whether, no, this is not the way it should be.
• 6:57
  Kristina Dryža: Gotta get them back, or to try to change something instead of actually some things in life we never solve, we never fix.
• 7:03
  Kristina Dryža: It's just a matter of.
• 7:04
  Kristina Dryža: How do I maybe carry it more elegantly?
• 7:07
  Kristina Dryža: Mm-hmm.
• 7:07
  Kristina Dryža: And see it as a necessity of something that I had to experience.
• 7:10
  Kristina Dryža: So those things, uh, I think were always in the background of, of, of my mind, of uh, and obviously, which led to constellations, which is, um, my family, uh, escaped for Second World War.
• 7:21
  Kristina Dryža: They were from Lithuania.
• 7:23
  Kristina Dryža: My, um, parents were born in the refugee camps in Germany, um, and then came out to Australia.
• 7:28
  Kristina Dryža: So there was almost that whole thing of the what if.
• 7:31
  Kristina Dryža: And I've always had those sliding doors.
• 7:33
  Kristina Dryža: If the war didn't happen, if, if they fled to America and not to Australia, who would I would?
• 7:39
  Kristina Dryža: All those kind of
• 7:39
  Tracy Cartwright: things.
• 7:40
  Tracy Cartwright: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 7:42
  Tracy Cartwright: The reality of that, isn't it?
• 7:44
  Tracy Cartwright: And I think, I mean obviously for you, that was very present in, in you from a young age, and for some of us it's.
• 7:50
  Tracy Cartwright: Some people never get to this point where they're thinking this.
• 7:53
  Tracy Cartwright: Yeah.
• 7:53
  Tracy Cartwright: Because that's not their pathway.
• 7:55
  Kristina Dryža: Yeah.
• 7:55
  Tracy Cartwright: Um, for some of us, it's been, been a little bit later in life when we've gone, oh yeah, gosh, what would, what would've happened?
• 8:01
  Tracy Cartwright: Who would I have been if my grandmother hadn't come out on that boat?
• 8:04
  Tracy Cartwright: You know?
• 8:04
  Tracy Cartwright: Yeah.
• 8:05
  Tracy Cartwright: Who would I have been with?
• 8:06
  Tracy Cartwright: Gosh, yeah.
• 8:07
  Tracy Cartwright: My ancestors weren't so keen to explore the world.
• 8:12
  Kristina Dryža: Yeah.
• 8:13
  Kristina Dryža: And I think it also helps in the sense of.
• 8:15
  Kristina Dryža: You know, if we imagine like a system as a vacuum cleaner and an individual as a speck of dust, like the vacuum cleaner will always win, the system wins.
• 8:22
  Kristina Dryža: Right?
• 8:23
  Kristina Dryža: And I think in our culture at the moment, so many issues are systemic, but the burden is placed on the individual.
• 8:29
  Tracy Cartwright: Yeah, absolutely.
• 8:31
  Tracy Cartwright: There's so much going on around me right now at this moment in time then.
• 8:35
  Kristina Dryža: Yeah.
• 8:35
  Kristina Dryža: And I think.
• 8:36
  Kristina Dryža: The other part of it also is if one thing would, could be different, would like any, everything, then kind of be different.
• 8:43
  Kristina Dryža: Um, and I find that many people, you know, so often, uh, we struggle to be in the unknown.
• 8:49
  Kristina Dryža: I'm not really talking referencing my, my myself here and in the present moment because it just looks like another trauma's gonna come down the track.
• 8:55
  Kristina Dryža: So in that hyper.
• 8:57
  Kristina Dryža: Presentness, but, uh, not almost in a sense if, um, you know, I think the thing that I really took away from Family Constellations a lot was this, that blind loyalty where, you know, say, and this was what happened in Lithuania, was, um, people were deported to Siberia.
• 9:15
  Kristina Dryža: And so that happened to your grandfather, um, who was literally in a gulag and, and in a prison that what a, a great grandchild or a grandchild might do is.
• 9:23
  Kristina Dryža: You know, it create a similar prison in their own mind, but a depression, but a prison on the same to say, see grandfather, I'm just like you.
• 9:29
  Kristina Dryža: I belong.
• 9:30
  Kristina Dryža: And I see that so often that, um, giving away, you know, uh, a false sense of, you know, our authenticity for this false sense of belonging.
• 9:39
  Kristina Dryža: Uh, and I think it made sense of a lot of behaviors of mine, uh, that actually came outta these having to flee, flee, flee a war zone, really.
• 9:48
  Tracy Cartwright: Wow.
• 9:49
  Tracy Cartwright: Yeah.
• 9:49
  Tracy Cartwright: I can, I, I can only imagine.
• 9:51
  Tracy Cartwright: Yeah.
• 9:52
  Tracy Cartwright: How do constellations find you?
• 9:54
  Kristina Dryža: Mm-hmm.
• 9:54
  Kristina Dryža: Yeah.
• 9:55
  Kristina Dryža: Um, I would say it would be.
• 9:58
  Kristina Dryža: Around 15 years or so ago, I was in Bali actually more on a work project, and I was speaking to someone.
• 10:04
  Kristina Dryža: It was about a future slash trends kind of project, and I didn't really, I think I was saying this, I've got this general Malay around me, you know, and, uh, I hadn't, I just was really unhappy and unsatisfied with where I was in life.
• 10:19
  Kristina Dryža: Um, and I didn't actually even mention anything to my family, and this is a person I just like met once.
• 10:23
  Kristina Dryža: And, um, they said, ah, I, I did this thing called, uh, family constellations and um, and the strangest thing.
• 10:30
  Kristina Dryža: And he explained a little bit of it where, you know, when you first hear it, you're just kind of like, this sounds like that drama role playing, acting.
• 10:37
  Kristina Dryža: Whatever.
• 10:38
  Kristina Dryža: Uh, and, but,
• 10:40
  Tracy Cartwright: but psychodrama sounds like psychodrama,
• 10:41
  Kristina Dryža: and I'm like, huh?
• 10:42
  Kristina Dryža: Like, what's this all about?
• 10:43
  Kristina Dryža: And but just that he said that what actually happened in the room, it then actually then mirrored what happened with his actual father.
• 10:50
  Kristina Dryža: And so it was this, and I understand, I understood by that said, also the holographic nature of the world.
• 10:56
  Kristina Dryža: Right.
• 10:56
  Kristina Dryža: You know, where it's like, what can happen.
• 10:58
  Kristina Dryža: The fact that it was being reflected, it happened in the physical, but then in one room, but then it also happened in.
• 11:03
  Kristina Dryža: Another time and space.
• 11:05
  Kristina Dryža: Uh, and so something was like, Ooh, ooh.
• 11:07
  Kristina Dryža: And I think part of it was the person said, I never thought that I could get to either it was this level of peace or to have this relationship with, with my father.
• 11:15
  Kristina Dryža: And I was like, do you know, like I think that, uh, so often we try to convince people about things, but if you are just the embodiment of the truth of your experience, people are like.
• 11:22
  Kristina Dryža: What do you want?
• 11:23
  Kristina Dryža: Like gimme some of that.
• 11:24
  Kristina Dryža: Like what do you like, you know, because it's just coming out of them.
• 11:26
  Kristina Dryža: And I could just see that he had found some sense of, really deep sense of, and a piece like just this real, um, it is as it is this isness and I could never get in my life to that isness.
• 11:37
  Kristina Dryža: I was always frustrated.
• 11:39
  Kristina Dryža: And I would say in some senses, I think human design also helps in that to be able to say like, uh, being a manifesting generator, um.
• 11:46
  Kristina Dryža: My not self.
• 11:47
  Kristina Dryža: I know when I'm not myself, when I'm frustrated.
• 11:49
  Kristina Dryža: And I would say I'm frustrated a lot of the time.
• 11:51
  Kristina Dryža: And to be in my, my, my, my, my more authentic self is to feel satisfied and to realize how rarely I felt that because I was either disappointed or, uh, you know, whatever things that come under the, the banner of frustration.
• 12:03
  Kristina Dryža: Um, and so when I finally then did a constellation.
• 12:07
  Kristina Dryža: It's almost in a sense as people would know that come from refugee families.
• 12:11
  Kristina Dryža: The the first generation just gets on with it.
• 12:13
  Kristina Dryža: It, it, it has to kind of block out everything that kind of happened.
• 12:15
  Kristina Dryža: It's like my grandparents came, they didn't speak English, you know, it's like a, uh, it's a new kind of world.
• 12:20
  Kristina Dryža: It's like, why, why would I refer back to the horrors of Europe?
• 12:23
  Kristina Dryža: I have to make this new life kind of here.
• 12:25
  Kristina Dryža: Um, and so it was not really kind of spoken about.
• 12:27
  Kristina Dryža: It was just.
• 12:28
  Kristina Dryža: I, I didn't even know quite a lot of it.
• 12:30
  Kristina Dryža: And so that was where the unraveling started.
• 12:32
  Kristina Dryža: And I would say it then kind of merged with my work with archetypes that I knew so, so often.
• 12:39
  Kristina Dryža: Um, I was very trapped in the victim, uh, mindset.
• 12:42
  Kristina Dryža: Mm-hmm.
• 12:42
  Kristina Dryža: Um, and look, we've all had experiences of being victimized many times over.
• 12:46
  Kristina Dryža: The issue is though, when you make it your identity, um, yeah.
• 12:49
  Kristina Dryža: What I found the I Amness, I am that and I find as Lithuania had done that as well because it'd been occupied by both Nazi Germany and Stalinist Russia.
• 12:58
  Kristina Dryža: And so its identity had really become crystallized in being the victim here.
• 13:03
  Kristina Dryža: Uh, and for how much people would speak to me about trying to enact agency in me or.
• 13:10
  Kristina Dryža: Changed my thoughts.
• 13:11
  Kristina Dryža: I also would say I was struggling with, uh, I was neuro, I didn't know I was neuro divergent that got diagnosed later.
• 13:16
  Kristina Dryža: But, um, obsessive thoughts.
• 13:18
  Kristina Dryža: So when people were saying, don't think like that, that's really victim or negative or whatever, my thoughts were sinking me and it was how like I was literally, my mind was a living hell.
• 13:29
  Kristina Dryža: Wow.
• 13:30
  Tracy Cartwright: Yeah.
• 13:31
  Tracy Cartwright: So how did you cope with that?
• 13:32
  Tracy Cartwright: How, what, what did you do to, what did you do with that?
• 13:35
  Kristina Dryža: I took it all on myself.
• 13:36
  Kristina Dryža: There must be something wrong with me.
• 13:38
  Kristina Dryža: Like, why?
• 13:39
  Kristina Dryža: You know, and I think we kind of say, why can't I be happy?
• 13:41
  Kristina Dryža: You know, I've got a roof over my head.
• 13:43
  Kristina Dryža: Uh, you know, I've always freelanced so it's been flee or Fallon, but there's, there's been like this, the, the possibility to have income, I should say.
• 13:49
  Kristina Dryža: And I think a lot of it, again, what systemically helps is how can I enjoy my life when my ancestors struggled so much?
• 13:58
  Kristina Dryža: How, how dare i?
• 13:59
  Tracy Cartwright: It's a big, it's a big one, isn't it?
• 14:01
  Tracy Cartwright: Mm. And there's so many people that are in that, but they just don't, they don't have, that penny hasn't dropped for themselves.
• 14:07
  Tracy Cartwright: I hoping that this will drop for many who listen to this
• 14:10
  Kristina Dryža: because so often you might go see a, a psychologist or a psychotherapist.
• 14:13
  Kristina Dryža: It will just be about you like.
• 14:15
  Kristina Dryža: Either cognitively trying to reframe a thought or things like that.
• 14:18
  Kristina Dryža: But when inherently you don't believe you deserve life because so many perished for you to have one, and you're not living up to your potential.
• 14:25
  Kristina Dryža: Um, and I think that's the other thing is family systems with a lot of trauma have so much unlived potential in them.
• 14:31
  Kristina Dryža: Um, and but the fact is that when we feel ourselves, we're not living up to our.
• 14:36
  Kristina Dryža: You know, potential, the self-regulation, um, is just so extreme that it can lead to suicidal ideation and to the depths, really.
• 14:47
  Tracy Cartwright: Yeah, absolutely.
• 14:49
  Tracy Cartwright: Absolutely.
• 14:49
  Tracy Cartwright: Now you were telling me, I'm just jumping back to, um, you met Constellations in Bali, so did you, that was the conversation.
• 14:55
  Kristina Dryža: Oh, so then I came to, I came and did my first one in, in Adelaide with Susan Ger.
• 15:00
  Kristina Dryža: And, and that was like.
• 15:02
  Kristina Dryža: Wow.
• 15:03
  Kristina Dryža: Uh, and again, like most people would say, uh, when you get the first chance to be a rep, how do I be a, like, am I gonna do this right?
• 15:09
  Kristina Dryža: And all the rest of it.
• 15:10
  Kristina Dryža: And I just remember I had to represent someone's father and all of a sudden said, I, I need to stand by the door, and I, I feel like I need to go get a drink.
• 15:16
  Kristina Dryža: And they were like, oh, yeah, yeah.
• 15:17
  Kristina Dryža: My dad left the house.
• 15:18
  Kristina Dryža: He was an alcoholic.
• 15:19
  Kristina Dryža: He, he left us.
• 15:21
  Kristina Dryža: I know that was the first bit where I was like, where did that, like instant knowing come from?
• 15:26
  Kristina Dryža: Mm-hmm.
• 15:26
  Kristina Dryža: Um, I would say that I, when I was first wrapping, I was still not so much in my head, but I wanted them.
• 15:31
  Kristina Dryža: To analyze as I was going.
• 15:33
  Kristina Dryža: And while now, and again, I think that so many of us were so disconnected from our bodies, it's almost, you can see yourself battling, is this right?
• 15:40
  Kristina Dryža: Is this not?
• 15:40
  Kristina Dryža: But it's almost like, what's the felt sense instead of, you know, what are you thinking or how you, but how the, the feeling, the felt sense of it.
• 15:48
  Kristina Dryža: Because I think, uh, in, in trauma almost in a sense, the heart and the head get disconnected.
• 15:52
  Kristina Dryža: And I was really, and if I, if I have any words of wisdom, but, uh.
• 15:57
  Kristina Dryža: Hopefully this will reach someone out there, which is, um, again, because of the immigrant family background, we got raised that knowledge is power.
• 16:04
  Kristina Dryža: So, you know, with my brother and I, we then ended postgraduate degrees and further study 'cause knowledge is power.
• 16:09
  Kristina Dryža: Um, so the Nazis might invade it again, or the, the, the Russians might, but we have our knowledge that's not power.
• 16:16
  Kristina Dryža: It's applied knowledge.
• 16:19
  Kristina Dryža: Is power.
• 16:19
  Kristina Dryža: It's that application and it's the, a bit of how is this now lived.
• 16:25
  Kristina Dryža: Um, and I think that's the part that I'm really interested in is more people's, how do we embody either new changes or new awarenesses?
• 16:32
  Kristina Dryža: Uh, and that usually has to come from an identity shift.
• 16:36
  Kristina Dryža: Because in a way, within an identity, there is language, there is posture, there's all these other things that are with it.
• 16:43
  Kristina Dryža: Um, it can't just be the cerebral intellectual knowing.
• 16:46
  Kristina Dryža: I that's like, almost like shelf knowledge.
• 16:48
  Kristina Dryža: It's almost like, how do I know this at a cellular level?
• 16:51
  Kristina Dryža: And then because I the body knows it, then almost in a sense I've actually become a different person because my cells are completely different.
• 16:58
  Tracy Cartwright: I get that, that's where I'm going at the moment.
• 17:00
  Tracy Cartwright: Transforming and letting go of.
• 17:03
  Tracy Cartwright: 'cause there's things that are rising up and Yeah, and, and it's acknowledging that, you know, not, and not dropping back into the victim side of it or, and, and just being aware and seeing it what it is and honoring the state that, that, that process of transformation as well.
• 17:20
  Kristina Dryža: Yeah.
• 17:21
  Kristina Dryža: Yeah.
• 17:22
  Tracy Cartwright: I was just gonna say, being in being in that state and for many of us, and all of us, probably, it's, uh, it's been a safe.
• 17:29
  Tracy Cartwright: Place hasn't always been healthy, but it's been a safe place inside now.
• 17:33
  Tracy Cartwright: So when we go, when we choose to, to, to do something different, we are stepping into that again.
• 17:38
  Tracy Cartwright: Back to your unknown, right?
• 17:39
  Kristina Dryža: Mm-hmm.
• 17:40
  Kristina Dryža: Yeah.
• 17:40
  Kristina Dryža: And there's no safety there.
• 17:42
  Kristina Dryža: And most of us we're in survival and there's so much now more work, obviously about the role of the nervous system.
• 17:49
  Kristina Dryža: So I would say a big piece.
• 17:50
  Kristina Dryža: I would say I still had quite a strong victim, complex, and even last year it was actually around the, the nervous system in the sense of always being in a fight or flight, um, mode, continuously, uh, that things began to kind of change.
• 18:05
  Kristina Dryža: And like what you were saying with awareness, sometimes awareness, we have to carry the awareness of something.
• 18:13
  Kristina Dryža: And only 10 years later, the will it kind of drop in while some we get that awareness and then the next day there's an action or a different change because we could put that awareness into motion.
• 18:22
  Kristina Dryža: Mm. So it's, it's interesting how some things in our lives we, as I said, it's just carrying them, but how do we do it elegantly because I don't think awareness on its own, uh, leads to change or, or transformation like instantly just like that.
• 18:36
  Tracy Cartwright: No.
• 18:36
  Tracy Cartwright: You know, and that's, yeah.
• 18:38
  Tracy Cartwright: You're saying that because I've been really aware.
• 18:40
  Tracy Cartwright: That I have been going into freeze.
• 18:42
  Kristina Dryža: Yeah.
• 18:43
  Tracy Cartwright: Um, I get a lot, I get a lot done and I do a lot of things.
• 18:46
  Tracy Cartwright: But then there's this times when I go into freeze and, and I'm aware that I'm doing, I'm repeating a pattern that I saw my mother and that I observed in my grandmother as well.
• 18:56
  Tracy Cartwright: Um, in fact, today I had a giggle at myself 'cause I was like lounging on the couch the exact same way that my grandmother would.
• 19:02
  Kristina Dryža: Oh yeah.
• 19:03
  Tracy Cartwright: In the same position.
• 19:03
  Tracy Cartwright: And I was like, okay, so there's something in this and then it's there.
• 19:06
  Tracy Cartwright: Oh, it's, and for a long time I would become aware of things, but I wouldn't act upon it.
• 19:10
  Kristina Dryža: Mm-hmm.
• 19:11
  Kristina Dryža: Mm-hmm.
• 19:11
  Tracy Cartwright: Something shifted.
• 19:12
  Tracy Cartwright: I don't know what shifted.
• 19:13
  Tracy Cartwright: And it doesn't matter.
• 19:14
  Tracy Cartwright: I'm just honoring the fact that I'm now able to start to act upon it.
• 19:18
  Kristina Dryža: Yes.
• 19:18
  Kristina Dryža: Yeah.
• 19:19
  Kristina Dryža: And in the present moment,
• 19:20
  Tracy Cartwright: yes, in the present moment.
• 19:21
  Tracy Cartwright: Rather than sitting there going, I should go up on that little trampoline and do some bouncing.
• 19:26
  Tracy Cartwright: 'cause it'll be really good for my lymphatics.
• 19:28
  Tracy Cartwright: Yeah.
• 19:28
  Tracy Cartwright: As I'm lying there, just.
• 19:30
  Tracy Cartwright: Doing nothing.
• 19:31
  Tracy Cartwright: Yeah.
• 19:32
  Tracy Cartwright: And then beating myself up 'cause I don't do that.
• 19:33
  Tracy Cartwright: So it's now I'm like, oh, I could, I could just go and do two minutes on that and then that'll move something and then I could do another two minutes later.
• 19:41
  Tracy Cartwright: Yeah,
• 19:42
  Kristina Dryža: yeah,
• 19:43
  Tracy Cartwright: yeah.
• 19:43
  Tracy Cartwright: And so whatever that is, whatever that is has shifted.
• 19:45
  Tracy Cartwright: But it's, it's coming into that awareness and, and, and it, I think there are layers of, I think try to keep the humanness out of it, a little bit of the story, you know, and just be in that present.
• 19:57
  Kristina Dryža: Yeah.
• 19:58
  Kristina Dryža: Yeah, because they always say archetypes or patterns, they're neutral.
• 20:02
  Kristina Dryža: Um, it's just either are they activated or they're deactivated.
• 20:08
  Kristina Dryža: Right.
• 20:08
  Kristina Dryža: So it's almost there.
• 20:09
  Kristina Dryža: We always can, like a, a good example, I would say it was, uh, my grandmother.
• 20:12
  Kristina Dryža: We would go to a restaurant and, um.
• 20:15
  Kristina Dryža: Back in the day, there was this place called Sizzler, and they had this like garlic bread kind of thing, came for free kind of anyway, it was, the bread was there and if it wasn't eaten outward, like the napkin and it would be rolled up and it would put in, be put into kind of the handbag.
• 20:26
  Kristina Dryža: And I, I'm almost the same way.
• 20:28
  Kristina Dryža: And you just find yourself like, do I really need to take this sugar from the cafe or in a hotel?
• 20:33
  Kristina Dryža: Do I really need like these freeze dried you do?
• 20:36
  Kristina Dryža: Because there's still that fear.
• 20:37
  Kristina Dryža: I don't know where my next meal is coming from.
• 20:38
  Kristina Dryža: And in a way you can actually feel that, uh, that energy activated, which is, I think it's a fine line between, you know, you don't wanna be wasteful with food, but for me it would almost kind of be, it's that fear of, I don't know where my next meal will kind of be coming from, which is.
• 20:54
  Kristina Dryža: Like why, in a way you have to weed everything on your plate.
• 20:58
  Kristina Dryža: Or if there's anything like, oh my God, if people just put food in the bin, that's fine to eat.
• 21:01
  Kristina Dryža: I just almost just die inside.
• 21:03
  Kristina Dryža: Like I can't.
• 21:04
  Kristina Dryža: It's really true.
• 21:05
  Kristina Dryža: So, because it's still, and I think that so many of us are in that, and when we're in survival, it's like past habituated automatic patterns.
• 21:14
  Kristina Dryža: So the first thing is to recognize those and then again, you'll, you'll be triggered quite a lot, but it's until then, once in the moment you go.
• 21:23
  Kristina Dryža: Choice exists.
• 21:24
  Kristina Dryža: And I think, like you said, like how did I get into this?
• 21:26
  Kristina Dryža: I didn't feel I could choose.
• 21:28
  Kristina Dryža: I, I felt like I wanted something.
• 21:31
  Kristina Dryža: And a lot of clients have come to me.
• 21:32
  Kristina Dryža: I do like archetypal readings for people, and they would say, Christina, um, I know better, but why do I have the inability to do better?
• 21:40
  Kristina Dryža: And that is what I kept feeling like, I know how to eat healthy.
• 21:43
  Kristina Dryža: I know how to save money.
• 21:44
  Kristina Dryža: I need, why can't I seem to do any of that?
• 21:46
  Kristina Dryža: And then why am I so in the self-sabotage mode?
• 21:49
  Kristina Dryža: And I ended up studying archetypes with Carolyn Mason.
• 21:52
  Kristina Dryža: It really helped me because she has four archetypes, which she calls the survival archetypes, and that's the child, the victim, the saboteur, and the prostitute.
• 22:02
  Kristina Dryža: Not the person on the street corner, but how we sell ourselves for safety and security and survival in the world.
• 22:07
  Kristina Dryža: And so those four patterns, they're in a way, they're always kind of operating in us.
• 22:10
  Kristina Dryža: And, and again, I could just see, and obviously by the name being the survival, because it's literally, it does feel so many things where life and death.
• 22:18
  Kristina Dryža: And if I can just say another example just to really ground it in, in how bad it was for me, I would, um, say go to, uh, a restaurant and, um, should I have a coffee or a latte?
• 22:28
  Kristina Dryža: That was life or death.
• 22:30
  Kristina Dryža: And if I made the wrong choice,'cause it didn't taste that great, people would go, well order another one or come back another time.
• 22:35
  Kristina Dryža: I couldn't see any of that.
• 22:37
  Kristina Dryža: And I think that was like linked with my grandparents, like, should we stay in Lithuania or should we go that every decision started having this life and death component within, it doesn't matter.
• 22:45
  Kristina Dryža: There's enough excess, we can get another coffee if you make a mistake.
• 22:48
  Kristina Dryža: You know, I'm doing inverted commas, whoever's listening.
• 22:50
  Kristina Dryža: Yeah.
• 22:50
  Kristina Dryža: Online on the radio.
• 22:52
  Tracy Cartwright: Yeah.
• 22:52
  Tracy Cartwright: Yeah.
• 22:52
  Tracy Cartwright: And is that still something that you, um, face or is, has that shifted for you?
• 22:58
  Kristina Dryža: I would say like all things, it's, everything comes in a a scale and I would say it's like toned down, but I think that is again, something that is part of my turning my fate into my destiny, where it would be that it's there, but I just don't live from that space anymore.
• 23:15
  Kristina Dryža: But it is still there.
• 23:17
  Kristina Dryža: And I think that's the thing with so much healing now, it's all about getting rid of and, and fixing and cutting out and things like that.
• 23:22
  Kristina Dryža: And it's actually, how do we make it more whole?
• 23:24
  Kristina Dryža: It's like, you know, if a nail gets like, uh, hammered into, you know, a, a tree, it's not about ripping out the nail, but a branch goes around it, or the kintsugi, you know, like the, you make pottery with the gold and make it even more beautiful.
• 23:35
  Kristina Dryža: And I think that it's almost the ability to allow it to be there.
• 23:39
  Tracy Cartwright: Well, it's there.
• 23:40
  Tracy Cartwright: It's happened and, and you can't change the fact that it's happened.
• 23:43
  Tracy Cartwright: Yeah,
• 23:43
  Kristina Dryža: but I feel, but I could, Tracy, that's a really interesting thing.
• 23:45
  Kristina Dryža: That's why I thought I'd say four decades of my life, I would replay the past, like every scenario.
• 23:51
  Kristina Dryža: So in, if I turned left instead of right.
• 23:54
  Kristina Dryža: Said this instead of that arrived one minute earlier.
• 23:56
  Kristina Dryža: One minute later, I was in the sliding doors.
• 23:58
  Kristina Dryža: This like two realities.
• 24:00
  Kristina Dryža: And I think that's a group that there's so many different levels of healing because there's so much, because for me it was, if only this didn't happen in the past, my present would be different.
• 24:08
  Kristina Dryža: But then I would still never present because I was still trying to change the past.
• 24:12
  Kristina Dryža: And it's so different when to be able to, can I actually be in the moment without actually thinking about something, but within actually my five physical senses in the moment, engaging in the moment.
• 24:23
  Tracy Cartwright: Beautiful.
• 24:24
  Tracy Cartwright: Beautiful.
• 24:25
  Tracy Cartwright: I wrote something down here.
• 24:26
  Tracy Cartwright: No, I didn't write it down.
• 24:27
  Tracy Cartwright: I was gonna ask.
• 24:28
  Tracy Cartwright: Oh yeah, I did.
• 24:28
  Tracy Cartwright: Ah.
• 24:29
  Tracy Cartwright: Find my piece of paper.
• 24:31
  Tracy Cartwright: Um, can we remember I said I had two questions and the other one was for you, how has Constellations touched your family system?
• 24:38
  Tracy Cartwright: If there's anything in that question that you'd like to answer.
• 24:41
  Kristina Dryža: Yeah.
• 24:42
  Kristina Dryža: Um, gosh, quite so, so much.
• 24:44
  Kristina Dryža: Um, I. Um, for those of you like that era in Australia, you might know this, but when I, when I was aged to go to school, it wasn't cool to be bilingual.
• 24:53
  Kristina Dryža: Like now it's cool to speak another language and be from another culture.
• 24:56
  Kristina Dryža: Um, and in Australia you become popular through playing sport.
• 25:00
  Kristina Dryža: And I couldn't play sport on the Saturdays.
• 25:03
  Kristina Dryža: I went to school because I had to go to a Lithian Saturday school and learn grammar and do folk dancing and Lithuanian scouts.
• 25:08
  Kristina Dryža: So I became like an, like a pariah almost in a sense of the, that that high school ness.
• 25:15
  Kristina Dryža: And, um.
• 25:16
  Kristina Dryža: And that in a way that outsider and never feeling like I belonged with the cool kids, um, was the very thing that made me be really good at my career.
• 25:28
  Kristina Dryža: Because being on the fringes, you are not always exposed to mainstream sources, right?
• 25:34
  Kristina Dryža: Mm-hmm.
• 25:34
  Kristina Dryža: And I think what I find now is so many people that will say.
• 25:39
  Kristina Dryža: Isolated in schooling, like when we went to school, um, you just really had to suffer through it alone.
• 25:45
  Kristina Dryža: Well, now, I don't know, you might have an interest in skateboarding and you find someone in Stockholm also that has a skateboarding or a music.
• 25:51
  Kristina Dryža: Like it's, it's different.
• 25:52
  Kristina Dryža: But that if you are on those fringes now more people, we find each other, but we're still so hurt by that experience of high school, which is, um, the, that, that almost like that inability to participate.
• 26:05
  Kristina Dryža: Um, and now.
• 26:08
  Kristina Dryža: It's almost like on being on the fringes people, we have almost in a way the medicine that the mainstream need, but we're still so hurt from those feelings of being isolated or ostracized or exiled because being exiled is almost like worse than death.
• 26:22
  Kristina Dryža: And so I could understand in my family why it was so important to try to belong to what the Lithuanian community in Adelaide was doing and things like that, because exile was worse, was worse than death.
• 26:33
  Kristina Dryža: So this, I could understand why we would contort ourselves into all these different shapes.
• 26:37
  Kristina Dryža: Just to belong, like super busy, but oh yeah, someone says they can make five cakes and volunteer here and do all of this and not value their own time and self-sacrifice to the point of burnout.
• 26:47
  Kristina Dryža: Um, and I would also say in my, shifted my relationship with my father who had died before, learned about and just understood, um, like.
• 27:01
  Kristina Dryža: I would never, his distance that I took painfully that I can now see in a constellation, um, was not distance and I had not.
• 27:10
  Kristina Dryža: Um, and my father also went to the Vietnam.
• 27:13
  Kristina Dryža: Uh, so the, the horrors that they have seen.
• 27:15
  Kristina Dryža: And I think part of that is, yeah, as you were saying, it's the, the honoring, but recognizing the fate of each individual soul and the fate of the family.
• 27:24
  Kristina Dryža: And I think also, I think some of us, we might have more, I call these soul contracts more like bleed throughs, where we're very entwined with the culture of the time.
• 27:33
  Kristina Dryža: Um, it's not like say Carl Jung and why people get interested in, say, individuation his process, which is, how do I recognize.
• 27:40
  Kristina Dryža: I'm walking down the street, what's my thought or what's, what's the, or is it a thought in the collective or an ancestral?
• 27:46
  Kristina Dryža: That ability to individuate, um, and recognizing, um, you know, when people would always say there's no mistakes, everything's happening perfectly as it is, I would rally against that for my whole life because I would be like, this is not my life.
• 28:00
  Kristina Dryža: This is, this is not where I, my, my place.
• 28:03
  Kristina Dryža: And I, I think when, um, I think again.
• 28:07
  Kristina Dryža: If the nervous system is so dysregulated, you don't even feel like you have a place in your body because you're not.
• 28:13
  Kristina Dryža: At home in your body.
• 28:14
  Kristina Dryža: Hmm.
• 28:16
  Kristina Dryža: And I think more and more that I can see the, the mysterious forces of synchronicity of everything that had to happen to be you.
• 28:25
  Kristina Dryža: But I still know when I, someone used to say that to me.
• 28:27
  Kristina Dryža: Well, everything happened to get to you to where you are today.
• 28:30
  Kristina Dryža: I hated who I was today.
• 28:32
  Kristina Dryža: That moment because that self-love hadn't kicked in.
• 28:35
  Kristina Dryža: And I think that's this other part of it.
• 28:37
  Kristina Dryža: Because otherwise you think that you are like in constellations bigger than the forces of the divine.
• 28:43
  Kristina Dryža: Like, you know how it should have gone World War ii?
• 28:46
  Kristina Dryža: No.
• 28:46
  Kristina Dryža: That was like, yeah, I, you know, you that you know more.
• 28:49
  Kristina Dryža: Um, instead of this sense of being able to, I think.
• 28:53
  Kristina Dryža: Be in resonant harmony with what's going on around you, uh, while still being able to find an individual path that allows you to flourish.
• 29:03
  Kristina Dryža: And I think so many of us that have these backgrounds, it, it's that cliche, we don't know actually how to thrive because every day was just.
• 29:10
  Kristina Dryža: Do I get to survive again?
• 29:12
  Tracy Cartwright: Yes, absolutely.
• 29:13
  Tracy Cartwright: Those who are watching this, you would've seen me have a really big smile.
• 29:16
  Tracy Cartwright: 'cause as you said this word, you said everything that it took for you or me to be you.
• 29:21
  Tracy Cartwright: Who, who I am or you to be who you are.
• 29:24
  Tracy Cartwright: There was a, something that flew across the front of your screen.
• 29:28
  Kristina Dryža: No way I missed it.
• 29:30
  Tracy Cartwright: Um, which, you know, I see the, like the orbs or whatever you wanna call it.
• 29:34
  Tracy Cartwright: Yeah.
• 29:35
  Tracy Cartwright: Like, oh, that was just like an acknowledgement.
• 29:37
  Tracy Cartwright: Oh,
• 29:38
  Kristina Dryža: I've watched another replay.
• 29:38
  Kristina Dryža: Wow.
• 29:39
  Kristina Dryža: Okay.
• 29:39
  Tracy Cartwright: That's, that's, yeah.
• 29:41
  Tracy Cartwright: That's fantastic.
• 29:42
  Tracy Cartwright: And, and bringing this to awareness and, uh, in a, in a language that's gonna resonate with some people that I haven't heard it this way before.
• 29:51
  Tracy Cartwright: Mm. Yeah.
• 29:52
  Tracy Cartwright: Right.
• 29:53
  Tracy Cartwright: But destiny, in fate, some people might think they're the same thing.
• 29:57
  Tracy Cartwright: How would you describe them?
• 29:58
  Kristina Dryža: Oh, yeah.
• 29:58
  Kristina Dryža: Yeah.
• 29:59
  Kristina Dryža: So I would just say a simple way would to say like, fate is the deck of, uh, cards that you get, like the hand of cards, that's your fate.
• 30:07
  Kristina Dryža: But what you do with those cards is up to you.
• 30:09
  Tracy Cartwright: It's your destiny
• 30:10
  Kristina Dryža: and that's your destiny.
• 30:11
  Kristina Dryža: Yeah.
• 30:12
  Kristina Dryža: That's your destiny.
• 30:12
  Kristina Dryža: So fate is almost the stuff that I am, uh, uh, I'm of a part, I, I'm Lithuanian, I'm of a particular height.
• 30:19
  Kristina Dryža: You know, I've got particular eyes, things like that.
• 30:21
  Kristina Dryža: Colors, um, uh, family circumstances.
• 30:24
  Kristina Dryža: As I said, coming from a refugee family, that's fate.
• 30:28
  Kristina Dryža: But it's not my destiny to stay, uh, with the mindset of a refugee family.
• 30:33
  Kristina Dryža: Um, you know, and part of it is how can I transform this to be my destiny?
• 30:38
  Kristina Dryža: And that, and that's a, um, a myth I work a lot with, which is the myth of Persephone.
• 30:43
  Kristina Dryža: So if people watch my TEDx, they can watch the, where I had to go into that myth, which is she has this underworld experience.
• 30:48
  Kristina Dryža: She gets kidnapped and dragged into the underworld, but it.
• 30:52
  Kristina Dryža: When we can see these, these rug pulling moments or this absolute despair as a necessity that you would never get to where you need to go without it.
• 31:01
  Kristina Dryža: I think that's the thing where you just say, my fate, it was necessary for me to become who I am, and I really like the, the.
• 31:07
  Kristina Dryža: The quote, uh, you know, around that character is destiny.
• 31:10
  Kristina Dryža: And it's almost like these experiences, the fated experiences, the accidents, the, the losses, the, the wars, the traumas almost in a sense, they're the things that actually activate this character.
• 31:21
  Kristina Dryža: And then who you are out of that is how you create this destiny.
• 31:24
  Tracy Cartwright: Exactly, yeah.
• 31:26
  Tracy Cartwright: Exactly,
• 31:27
  Kristina Dryža: because think about it, like there's no wise, compassionate person that, you know, that has not gone through a lot of hell to be that wise and compassionate.
• 31:34
  Kristina Dryža: It's not possible.
• 31:34
  Kristina Dryža: You can't, it's not something that you can like get a, a drink at the supermarket at that, that is direct lived experience.
• 31:41
  Tracy Cartwright: Yeah.
• 31:41
  Kristina Dryža: That you, you cannot have that character that cannot be bought like you, you know, go buy a t-shirt at a shop.
• 31:46
  Tracy Cartwright: Yeah.
• 31:47
  Kristina Dryža: And it's like, how do we value that as well?
• 31:49
  Kristina Dryža: And to be able to, in a sense, you know, we were talking about earlier about survival.
• 31:53
  Kristina Dryža: It's almost like how do I, even in my own presence, that people can feel safe around me because I'm not judging them or I am, I'm not, um, putting my own ideas, like trying to like force 'em kind of through that.
• 32:05
  Kristina Dryža: It's almost this ability to like graciously.
• 32:09
  Kristina Dryža: Allow space for others, almost in a sense to have a softening.
• 32:13
  Kristina Dryža: Because so often we, we come at healing like from a very left brain perspective.
• 32:17
  Kristina Dryža: And what my work is really interested in now is, is how do we build that bridge between the left brain and the right brain, the right brain being one more, which is about, um, emotions and music and symbols and archetypes and myths and ritual and community rather than the left brain, which is more the logistics and the rational.
• 32:34
  Kristina Dryža: And I always say.
• 32:35
  Kristina Dryža: If someone, you know, with, with depression, it's you, you might go read in a magazine or see someone and they say very left brain things like, um, either change your diet or, um, exercise or stare at the sun, write a gratitude list or left brain things.
• 32:48
  Kristina Dryža: But when you are in a depression, you're more in the underworld and you need the right brain to be able to heal, to bring the wholeness.
• 32:53
  Kristina Dryža: So go watch a film that's got a really great, um, protagonist, like that's the, that the, the, the hero or the Harold, not the story where you identify with them because.
• 33:03
  Kristina Dryža: Their transformation, their success, their victories will become yours because you're so identified with them.
• 33:08
  Kristina Dryža: So there is a, there's a, a space for this Netflix and chill because it's actually the story that's healing.
• 33:13
  Kristina Dryža: It becomes medicine.
• 33:15
  Kristina Dryža: And to get there, it's, we first recognize, first need to recognize what are the stories I told to myself about myself.
• 33:22
  Kristina Dryža: Before then I can say, what are the stories that nourish us as a humanity?
• 33:25
  Kristina Dryža: Because stories can either, like they hurt or they can kind of heal.
• 33:29
  Kristina Dryža: And so I would advise people, you know, if I can give another, just something to, to be aware of is, is one's inner narrative and that's self dialogue.
• 33:38
  Kristina Dryža: Um, and I think that's why I was also trapped in the victim because I, I didn't realize the constant mental narrative that I had, that there was no space for the divine or presence or my body to even have.
• 33:50
  Kristina Dryža: Of space.
• 33:51
  Tracy Cartwright: Yeah.
• 33:51
  Tracy Cartwright: Wow.
• 33:52
  Tracy Cartwright: And that, and that potentially would be, as you said, from, from that ancestral trauma, just, just moving in yourselves and being there resonating and, and, um, and yeah.
• 34:04
  Tracy Cartwright: And you were the one in the family that is able to look at this on your level
• 34:09
  Kristina Dryža: Yeah.
• 34:09
  Tracy Cartwright: For yourself and then for the collective.
• 34:11
  Tracy Cartwright: Right?
• 34:11
  Kristina Dryža: Yeah.
• 34:12
  Kristina Dryža: And I do feel this just, just depends on people's.
• 34:15
  Kristina Dryža: People's lens, but I, I personally believe in, in reincarnation.
• 34:18
  Kristina Dryža: So it's, it's to see that there's a, a larger perspective playing out.
• 34:21
  Kristina Dryža: And I would also say, say maybe people might not hold that view.
• 34:24
  Kristina Dryža: I could then say with the myths that basically why the myths are so powerful and the most important in a way, storyline or narrative of life is because they really display the human experience.
• 34:35
  Kristina Dryža: Um, there's jealousy, there's envy, there's betrayal, there's all the, there's very human things that are there.
• 34:40
  Kristina Dryža: Um, but they show us that we're not alone.
• 34:43
  Kristina Dryža: And so often when we're going through something, it's like, I'm the only one that's experienced this.
• 34:47
  Kristina Dryža: But then you might be, I don't know, AOUS in the Odyssey, lost at sea feeling that, but then you're going, oh no, there's a greater, a myth.
• 34:54
  Kristina Dryža: There's almost like a psychological cradle that the myth becomes that it can carry you because I'm not lost at sea.
• 34:59
  Kristina Dryža: It's actually a pattern, you know?
• 35:01
  Kristina Dryža: And that's why, and I, I'm one of the writers for the Joseph Campbell Foundation, as people would know, like that heroes journey.
• 35:06
  Kristina Dryža: It's, it's like when you're in the belly of the whale.
• 35:09
  Kristina Dryža: It's in that really the darkest, deep pits of depression to be able to go, oh, okay, this is a necessity.
• 35:16
  Kristina Dryža: I have to atone, say here, or there's something there.
• 35:19
  Kristina Dryža: There's almost, in a sense, it's not like that.
• 35:21
  Kristina Dryža: Everything has a reason in that cliched kind of way, but it's almost like the necessity for the next part of the process to occur.
• 35:27
  Kristina Dryža: Yeah, and we all just wanna go from zero to 100, or everything's Amazon Prime download speed instead of, actually, it's almost like, I think so much operates more on a divine timing because it has to almost, in a sense, again, be integrated for you to live out of a different perspective.
• 35:44
  Kristina Dryža: You know, so it's not like you can can't have a all in like, like, and, and, and if you look at say, people that do say I awash or mushrooms or something, so often they might get this wisdom, but, but Kaung would say, beware of unearned wisdom.
• 35:56
  Kristina Dryža: You crossed a threshold that you didn't almost get there of your own making.
• 36:01
  Kristina Dryža: And so be aware of that.
• 36:02
  Kristina Dryža: That's not actually the true wisdom.
• 36:04
  Kristina Dryža: Um, and so I think there's almost this.
• 36:06
  Kristina Dryža: Uh, if we wanna look at it, the, the evolution of how we've healed in our own personal lives, where retrospectively, oh, this had to happen for them to then happen.
• 36:15
  Kristina Dryža: You know, it's that tapestry.
• 36:16
  Kristina Dryža: You can only make sense of the pattern of it reading backwards, but you can only make sense of it moving forward in trust.
• 36:21
  Tracy Cartwright: Mm. Yeah.
• 36:23
  Tracy Cartwright: Yeah, it's beautiful.
• 36:25
  Tracy Cartwright: That's beautiful.
• 36:25
  Tracy Cartwright: Tell me a little bit more about, um, your archetypal readings that you offer.
• 36:31
  Kristina Dryža: Yeah, yeah.
• 36:32
  Kristina Dryža: So basically people come from a variety of different reasons.
• 36:34
  Kristina Dryža: So for some people it's very something specific, which is got either an issue with a family member or something in at work or something that I always kind of say.
• 36:42
  Kristina Dryža: It's like when your left brain has run out of ways of dealing with something like how do I peer underneath the hood of the psyche of what's going on?
• 36:48
  Kristina Dryža: So someone might have a constellation at that point as well.
• 36:51
  Kristina Dryža: So it's like, um, say if someone came.
• 36:54
  Kristina Dryža: With an issue to say a typical counselor, they can only talk about what they already know or what's already in the space.
• 37:00
  Kristina Dryža: But I work with an archetypal wheel of 12 archetypes, sometimes the four that I mentioned, the survival and, um, eight others, or sometimes just 12.
• 37:09
  Kristina Dryža: But it's being able to, in a way, bring forces that have not yet been seen.
• 37:15
  Kristina Dryža: Two conscious awareness.
• 37:16
  Kristina Dryža: So the A card might come out like it might be, uh, the trickster or the engineer or the magical child, and all of a sudden the person's never referenced any of them in their awareness.
• 37:27
  Kristina Dryža: And they're like, oh, that makes sense.
• 37:29
  Kristina Dryža: 'cause other, my dad was an engineer, or I used to magical child, you know, have really these amazing daydreams and, and imagined other worlds when I was a kid.
• 37:37
  Kristina Dryža: And so you're working with.
• 37:39
  Kristina Dryža: In a way, what people, um, have references or associations kind of with into the space.
• 37:45
  Kristina Dryža: Um, and so in a way, you are not now being run by these like forces, you know, they're not in the unconscious or the subconscious.
• 37:51
  Kristina Dryža: It's almost like they're, they're, they're now in the corner of your eye and you can have a conscious relationship with them.
• 37:56
  Kristina Dryža: And the other way that I work with the 12 is, um, with the, uh, astrological houses, I always say people don't need to know much about the astrology.
• 38:04
  Kristina Dryža: Other than that there's 12 houses and they are different from your first house, say identity, seven house relationships, 10th, highest potential, 11th.
• 38:14
  Kristina Dryža: You know, um, you know, your interaction with the world because.
• 38:17
  Kristina Dryža: Say someone you know really displays a strong pattern of a shaman or a healer.
• 38:21
  Kristina Dryža: Well, it's very different from how you are at home as a healer to, uh, you know, spirituality into self-expression to the unconscious, right?
• 38:30
  Kristina Dryža: Mm-hmm.
• 38:30
  Kristina Dryža: So I look at, if we look at archetypes as like Anta and the houses as more like the theater stage, how they're actually operating, and we just spend time going through these.
• 38:39
  Kristina Dryža: These 12 forces, um, and whether people are in conscious relationship with them or not, if they're in the shadow or in the light.
• 38:46
  Kristina Dryža: And part of it is, again, there's the awareness, but then there's this part of it where the, I guess in a way, the, the, the real magic almost happens where it's almost the, the alchemy of, I've gone, like you would say, from the reto, from the darkness of the pattern to that I am, I can almost allow it to be there.
• 39:05
  Kristina Dryža: With the light.
• 39:06
  Kristina Dryža: I'm not choosing one or the other, but there's almost this, um, it's like you can be, like with family constellations, we hear some really highness things.
• 39:15
  Kristina Dryža: You can be close to evil, but you're not consumed by it.
• 39:17
  Kristina Dryža: I can touch all these things, but they don't have to become me.
• 39:21
  Kristina Dryža: 'cause I'm not identifying with them.
• 39:22
  Kristina Dryža: They're just patterns and a pattern can be activated or deactivated.
• 39:26
  Kristina Dryža: And so it's just bringing, again, more of the awareness and the capacity for the choosing function.
• 39:33
  Kristina Dryža: And again, choice in the present moment, not, I wish I did this yesterday when this situation kind of came up, but when it comes up in the moment and that the body actually feels safe enough and, and I really feel that all change.
• 39:44
  Kristina Dryža: It really does.
• 39:45
  Kristina Dryža: Belong or start with, um, at the identity level.
• 39:48
  Kristina Dryža: So if we look at, say the victim, like one way to, to start moving outta that is to be able to have a sense of victory because you haven't felt it for so long.
• 39:59
  Kristina Dryža: And that's why the us you know, there's all those, you know, memes or the reality of it where people, the Navy seals say, make my bed every morning, right?
• 40:06
  Kristina Dryža: Because that's a victory.
• 40:08
  Kristina Dryža: Go for if you then you'd go for a jog or all the sounds like you build up the sense where I know what that.
• 40:14
  Kristina Dryža: Feeling victorious feels in my body.
• 40:16
  Kristina Dryža: And it's almost like doing the, like arm pumping, the fist pumping and things like that because it hasn't been felt for so long.
• 40:21
  Kristina Dryža: That force.
• 40:23
  Kristina Dryža: Um, and it also allows us to recognize that we ca we tap into more the capital s self rather the lower as self.
• 40:30
  Kristina Dryža: Because say we're struggling with an issue, you, you just put on a different archetypal cloak.
• 40:35
  Kristina Dryža: How would the shaman meet this issue?
• 40:37
  Kristina Dryža: How would the queen.
• 40:39
  Kristina Dryža: Meet this kind of issue.
• 40:40
  Kristina Dryža: Um, you know, how would the environmentalist, all of a sudden, I've got different ways of moving in the world because I was just trapped in my habituated identity.
• 40:49
  Kristina Dryža: So it's, again, it's uh, because say you are really stressed in a supermarket queue or something, and I, you know, I don't remember when I was like this, and you're counting numbers in people's baskets and you're like, you don't have seven or less, you shouldn't be in this like faster lane or whatever and can get really into this stage.
• 41:05
  Kristina Dryža: But if you are like, oh, what would the Dalai Lama do in this moment?
• 41:08
  Kristina Dryža: And all of a sudden you just relax.
• 41:10
  Kristina Dryža: Like there's no effort because you've taken on the identity.
• 41:13
  Kristina Dryža: Because it's like with the Dalai Lama, like, uh, you don't need to read the, his books on compassion.
• 41:18
  Kristina Dryža: His very presence is compassion.
• 41:20
  Kristina Dryža: And I feel what's happening at the moment.
• 41:21
  Kristina Dryža: All of us have, in a way read the same books.
• 41:23
  Kristina Dryža: We've all read the power of now, we've all, you know, but it's like, do I live?
• 41:27
  Kristina Dryža: Is my life an embodi?
• 41:28
  Kristina Dryža: The greatest truth that I've been exposed to.
• 41:30
  Kristina Dryža: So am I embodying all the teachings that I've been exposed to?
• 41:34
  Kristina Dryža: That's the embodying the presence so people would see it.
• 41:37
  Kristina Dryža: So it just kind of shows us, if I was looking, if I had, was struggling with something or say I'm, I'm in the underworld.
• 41:44
  Kristina Dryža: You know, if I was the knight in shining armor.
• 41:48
  Kristina Dryža: Or, um, if I was the orphan child, I would be spending that time in the underworld very differently according to those archetypal patterns and that they are there and available these forces for us to consciously work with, is what I'd want to say.
• 42:01
  Tracy Cartwright: Can you explain to those who don't know the term, what does the underworld mean?
• 42:07
  Kristina Dryža: Yeah.
• 42:07
  Kristina Dryža: So for, I would say it's, um, some people would, it's almost like everything that's unknown about yourself and the world where.
• 42:18
  Kristina Dryža: Upper world would be, I, I, I know how I go to work.
• 42:22
  Kristina Dryža: I know my partner, I know what I like to eat and things like that.
• 42:24
  Kristina Dryža: But then we sometimes have experiences where I can't find my bearings anywhere.
• 42:30
  Kristina Dryža: I, I, I, I used to be really happy.
• 42:33
  Kristina Dryža: Doing this job or being this in this relationship.
• 42:35
  Kristina Dryža: But now I am, I don't know what I feel.
• 42:37
  Kristina Dryža: I don't have that same love or I, I don't have that same motivation.
• 42:40
  Kristina Dryža: And it's like, it's almost like a reordering of where your center of gravity kind of is, that you can't navigate through the usual touchpoints.
• 42:48
  Tracy Cartwright: Okay.
• 42:49
  Kristina Dryža: And so some people would say it would be like, it would feel like either, it could be feel a depression or unknown or an uncertainty, but.
• 42:57
  Kristina Dryža: Again, it's almost the, it appears almost in our lives.
• 43:01
  Kristina Dryža: It, it is actually a literal, if we look at it in mythological terms, it's a place, it's called Hades.
• 43:06
  Kristina Dryža: Um, and so the terrain is the underworld.
• 43:10
  Kristina Dryža: And, um, within that there's like tarus, which is like, there's a character there who's, um, he, he's so thirsty, but the water comes to his lips, but he can never take it.
• 43:19
  Kristina Dryža: There's fruit that's dangling near his mouth, but he kind of can't eat it.
• 43:22
  Kristina Dryža: So being stuck in that kind of.
• 43:24
  Kristina Dryža: State.
• 43:25
  Kristina Dryža: Um, and there's sheron there.
• 43:27
  Kristina Dryža: The, the crossing, the ferry.
• 43:29
  Kristina Dryža: You know, there's, it's a whole world that exists.
• 43:31
  Kristina Dryža: There's maps of it that you can even look at online, but then there's also like Hades, which is also the guard of the underworld, and as a character, as a personification of this feeling where.
• 43:41
  Kristina Dryža: You almost have to meet, we could even say, um, for those that know this, the, the style was referenced like, um, south Vader and recognize that, oh yeah, that's me.
• 43:51
  Kristina Dryža: That's, that's, you know, so really to go do this.
• 43:53
  Kristina Dryža: So
• 43:54
  Tracy Cartwright: like, so meeting
• 43:54
  Kristina Dryža: that and a lot of reckoning of, um, our pride or we often get taken down there, um, to, to really reassess our ways of operating in the upper world that are no longer serving us.
• 44:08
  Kristina Dryža: Yeah.
• 44:09
  Kristina Dryža: But again, watch my TEDx and I'll go through it there in more detail.
• 44:11
  Tracy Cartwright: Yeah, yeah.
• 44:13
  Tracy Cartwright: Well, we'll share that link in, um, in, in the details as well with this.
• 44:17
  Kristina Dryža: I would also say it's sometimes more, um, that, that people just have sometimes an existential crisis.
• 44:23
  Kristina Dryža: Like, you know, like at the moment there's so much going on in the world, right?
• 44:27
  Kristina Dryža: And people might say something like, the world just feels off.
• 44:29
  Kristina Dryža: I can't quite put my finger on it.
• 44:32
  Kristina Dryža: Um, some people say might say pre 2019 or 2008, whatever it was, there's something off in the world and almost just, I don't yet know how to be in it, but it, there's this, an ease there that where almost like the, everything that was once known now is not, is because like, who would've thought that?
• 44:53
  Kristina Dryža: President, or when we say like the, uh, rapist is now a president that is now invading a country of Venezuela and taking it.
• 44:58
  Kristina Dryža: So like, it's almost like this sense.
• 45:00
  Kristina Dryža: There's just so much in that sense of this, can this really be real?
• 45:04
  Kristina Dryža: That sometimes people just go and let alone everything that's happening with the environment and the amount of animals that are becoming extinct.
• 45:10
  Kristina Dryža: There's almost this like, I, I just don't know.
• 45:12
  Kristina Dryža: And, and also a crisis of meaning, which is brought in with ai, which is like, where do we, where will we find our meaning?
• 45:18
  Kristina Dryža: So it's a meaning crisis that so many people are going through too.
• 45:23
  Tracy Cartwright: Huge shifts and, um, and things to navigate in the world.
• 45:26
  Tracy Cartwright: I mean, there always is, right?
• 45:28
  Tracy Cartwright: Over time these things evolve, but I think there is, there seems to be like just.
• 45:33
  Tracy Cartwright: Quantifiably so much more going on because the faster we get, the more there is and then we don't take time to integrate.
• 45:40
  Tracy Cartwright: 'cause it's the next one.
• 45:41
  Tracy Cartwright: It's the next thing.
• 45:42
  Tracy Cartwright: Yeah.
• 45:42
  Tracy Cartwright: It's the, and then it becomes this real overwhelm of um, yeah.
• 45:47
  Tracy Cartwright: Of everything.
• 45:47
  Tracy Cartwright: And
• 45:48
  Kristina Dryža: that, and even with healing, like with, there's so many modalities out there.
• 45:51
  Kristina Dryža: Gimme more, gimme more, gimme more like that.
• 45:53
  Kristina Dryža: Hunger for it.
• 45:54
  Kristina Dryža: But we don't know how to digest and assimilate, you know, each, each, almost in a sense, each book or each workshop or things.
• 46:01
  Kristina Dryža: And that's the thing now with say TikTok and Instagram, you can scroll and get all this great like wisdom, um, but it's bite-sized and it wasn't actually out of your own direct lived experience.
• 46:10
  Kristina Dryža: So you're getting full of, in a way, information, data, information and knowledge.
• 46:13
  Kristina Dryža: But it's not wisdom because it wasn't digested and assimilated and coming out of you as a direct lived experience.
• 46:20
  Kristina Dryža: But then you have this mental awareness of.
• 46:21
  Kristina Dryža: Ah, I know this is my, I'm freaking out in this dating experience because it's anxious attachment, so you'll know all about it, but your body doesn't know.
• 46:29
  Kristina Dryža: And that's the thing where psychosis comes from.
• 46:31
  Kristina Dryža: It's like when the lived experience and the mental like that, they just become two greater parts.
• 46:35
  Kristina Dryža: Like they just become more and more extreme.
• 46:37
  Kristina Dryža: So it's the, the knowingness.
• 46:39
  Kristina Dryža: Versus actually the lived experience.
• 46:42
  Kristina Dryža: And again, we're in an attention deficit culture.
• 46:45
  Kristina Dryža: And again, where is things that can ground us like ritual, which community?
• 46:50
  Kristina Dryža: And I also think healing where past the day and age, I think of individual healing.
• 46:54
  Kristina Dryža: I think it's much more about collective healing.
• 46:56
  Kristina Dryža: Systemic, yeah.
• 46:57
  Kristina Dryža: And that's why I think so many of us have had our dark nights of the soul.
• 47:00
  Kristina Dryža: Another word for the underworld for those, if I didn't explain that well enough that before.
• 47:03
  Kristina Dryža: It's a dark night of the soul where you just question everything.
• 47:05
  Kristina Dryža: And so many of us have been throughout Dark Night of the Soul experience to be able to help others.
• 47:09
  Kristina Dryža: And almost as the planet is now having its own dark night of the soul experience.
• 47:14
  Tracy Cartwright: Mm, yeah, yeah, absolutely.
• 47:16
  Tracy Cartwright: And there are so many different, um, you know, like you said, the different names for it and, and the understandings and the awareness.
• 47:22
  Tracy Cartwright: I and um, and it's fascinating.
• 47:27
  Tracy Cartwright: Myself, like when I first met you seven or eight years ago.
• 47:30
  Tracy Cartwright: Yeah.
• 47:31
  Tracy Cartwright: Yeah.
• 47:32
  Tracy Cartwright: It's been.
• 47:34
  Tracy Cartwright: The whole concept of learning archetypal.
• 47:37
  Tracy Cartwright: Okay.
• 47:38
  Tracy Cartwright: Right, because I met you at, at the intensive in Australia and Sydney, um, many years ago.
• 47:44
  Tracy Cartwright: And then we got, then we had one of those times was, um, you were rooming with my, with Fiona and so Yeah.
• 47:50
  Tracy Cartwright: To know you even more and, and you were presenting at that one as well, so, so you.
• 47:57
  Tracy Cartwright: Mel did I think at that time some constellations with your archetypal work?
• 48:00
  Kristina Dryža: I did.
• 48:00
  Kristina Dryža: I did.
• 48:01
  Kristina Dryža: So one, one was actually getting people to, uh, I did, uh, one that was a myth and one that was an archetype.
• 48:06
  Kristina Dryža: So it was actually being able to have people to stand in the place of some of these, like Greek guard that the Pantheon, right?
• 48:14
  Kristina Dryža: So, um, represent ze.
• 48:16
  Kristina Dryža: You know, represent like, um, Aphrodite slash Venus, you know, like what would it actually feel like?
• 48:22
  Kristina Dryža: And all of a sudden people just start feeling their divine attributes.
• 48:26
  Tracy Cartwright: Yeah.
• 48:27
  Kristina Dryža: And that you can represent and to feel that in your own body.
• 48:29
  Kristina Dryža: And again, it needs to, it's that felt experience.
• 48:31
  Kristina Dryža: So it's not about studying the myths and, and all the, the Greek gods and goddesses of something out there.
• 48:37
  Kristina Dryža: No, no, no.
• 48:38
  Kristina Dryža: They're actually in us.
• 48:39
  Kristina Dryža: And also, I mean, for me, when I now, uh, view a, view a constellation, um, I'm looking to work with some constellations to do this.
• 48:47
  Kristina Dryža: But for me, I'm, I'm, I'm seeing the archetypes that are there and the myths that are going along with it.
• 48:52
  Kristina Dryža: So especially I can see so often the orphan child.
• 48:57
  Kristina Dryža: Um, and in myth, like so many of us, we feel orphaned, not literally, but from our family of origin because we're so different, or the black sheep or whatever it is.
• 49:06
  Kristina Dryža: But to recognize that in myth, the orphan child is always the one that has the magic and it's necessary to have not had that belonging for their magical powers to, to be, um, to be developed.
• 49:15
  Kristina Dryža: And again, we start recognizing the necessity of that or being able to see stories and myths.
• 49:20
  Kristina Dryža: I see them play out in constellations quite a lot.
• 49:22
  Kristina Dryža: Um.
• 49:23
  Kristina Dryža: But again, to be able to then understand in a constellation, it's where archetypally someone is or where they are in their identity or that they're in a myth.
• 49:31
  Kristina Dryža: So I, so for myself, again, that experience of not belonging at school, uh, it's also that ugly duckling.
• 49:36
  Kristina Dryža: Most of us know the story of the ugly duckling.
• 49:38
  Kristina Dryža: People might treat you like a swan, but your own inner image is still of that ugly duckling and the wounding that goes along with that of never finding your place.
• 49:47
  Kristina Dryža: So it's another way to perceive also what constellations are, are showing us.
• 49:52
  Kristina Dryža: And I think you can.
• 49:53
  Kristina Dryža: Yeah.
• 49:53
  Kristina Dryža: And you can see it as well, like in, in, in the damsel in distress, like the Cinderella waiting to be rescued by the prince, you know?
• 50:00
  Kristina Dryža: And, and we can also be that like waiting to be rescued by the Constellation, you know, instead of how do I be my own night in, in shining armor.
• 50:06
  Tracy Cartwright: Exactly.
• 50:07
  Tracy Cartwright: Be that for yourself, isn't it?
• 50:08
  Kristina Dryža: Be the answer to not just somebody to the prayers, but your press to somebody else's prayers and walk around the world like your prayers are answered.
• 50:15
  Kristina Dryža: Like that's
• 50:16
  Tracy Cartwright: I love, I love what you said before about, you know, like, what would the Dai Lama do in this moment, or
• 50:19
  Kristina Dryža: Yeah.
• 50:20
  Tracy Cartwright: Or whoever it is that you are, you know, um, I say to my students, uh, just ask the question, what would Tracy do right now?
• 50:26
  Tracy Cartwright: Like when I'm teaching them constellations and they, they might be doing a constellation and they're stuck.
• 50:30
  Tracy Cartwright: Well, what would Tracy do right now?
• 50:31
  Tracy Cartwright: Yeah.
• 50:32
  Tracy Cartwright: What would good Heer do right now?
• 50:34
  Tracy Cartwright: Take a breath.
• 50:35
  Kristina Dryža: Yeah, I was about to take a breath.
• 50:36
  Kristina Dryža: Yeah.
• 50:36
  Kristina Dryža: Say you're struggling with motivation, like, I don't know, what would Tony Robbins say?
• 50:39
  Kristina Dryža: What would like Oprah say?
• 50:40
  Kristina Dryža: Like almost all, I always find, um, when I feel, for me, I'm almost like I am obviously the age I am and grew up in Australia with Princess Diana on the front covers.
• 50:50
  Kristina Dryža: I'm sometimes when I feel really nervous in a situation like Howard Princess Diana Act, and all of a sudden this like regal grace will just descend in you.
• 50:56
  Tracy Cartwright: We'll have to try that.
• 50:58
  Kristina Dryža: Yeah.
• 50:58
  Kristina Dryža: So just know that these forces of that to be able to, in a way, allow you to embody a different way of being, because everything comes out of our state.
• 51:06
  Kristina Dryža: It's, it comes first, you know, from our state of being, then the action, you know, and that's that frequency.
• 51:12
  Kristina Dryža: Um, and, and to be able, in a way, I don't mean this in a new actually kind of way, but that to be able to, when we.
• 51:17
  Kristina Dryža: Play with these archetypes and forces and identities and myths where we're just like really calibrating different frequencies.
• 51:23
  Kristina Dryža: And it's like a beautiful piano.
• 51:25
  Kristina Dryža: We've got now the whole scale, the whole however many keys are there that we can play them.
• 51:29
  Kristina Dryža: We're not just stuck in this one note, like I was stuck in the one note of the victim, right?
• 51:33
  Kristina Dryža: But now all of a sudden there's all these different notes that I can play.
• 51:36
  Kristina Dryža: Different frequencies, different ways of perceiving that I can now, uh, embody.
• 51:40
  Kristina Dryža: I don't have to just stay stuck in one, uh, limited habituated.
• 51:44
  Kristina Dryža: You know, we might say the old version of ourselves or a past identity.
• 51:48
  Kristina Dryža: It's almost, I have the capacity to choose, so will I now choose this next moment to meet up with enthusiasm?
• 51:53
  Kristina Dryža: Right.
• 51:53
  Kristina Dryža: That could be like a, and be enthusiasm or might be inspirational imagination.
• 51:57
  Kristina Dryža: There's so many different ways now, and that's when you start feeling more like a co-creator.
• 52:02
  Tracy Cartwright: Yeah.
• 52:02
  Kristina Dryža: And then you want to inspire that in in others to recognize.
• 52:04
  Kristina Dryža: They also have this co-creative FAC facility, and it's always happening every single moment because the past and the present, the future, they're all interconnected.
• 52:12
  Tracy Cartwright: Yeah.
• 52:13
  Tracy Cartwright: You were saying that earlier on, you said like the, the, the past, the present of their future.
• 52:18
  Tracy Cartwright: It's all now.
• 52:19
  Kristina Dryža: Yeah.
• 52:20
  Kristina Dryža: Yeah.
• 52:21
  Tracy Cartwright: I love, I, I just love the way you're framing this and.
• 52:25
  Tracy Cartwright: Okay, now this is, um, this might not resonate with everyone 'cause they, they might understand the whole archetypal thing and it might not be something you're interested in, but for those, um, yeah, I'm, I can see like light bulbs going off all over the place for people that are listening to this and, um, and pennies dropping, you know.
• 52:42
  Tracy Cartwright: This is what I can do.
• 52:43
  Tracy Cartwright: This is who I, oh, alright.
• 52:44
  Tracy Cartwright: This is, yeah, I feel like, I felt like, um, I felt like a hero in that moment.
• 52:49
  Tracy Cartwright: You know, I had my hero, I can talk.
• 52:50
  Tracy Cartwright: Oh, right, okay.
• 52:52
  Tracy Cartwright: Oh yeah, you victim.
• 52:53
  Tracy Cartwright: Yeah, I get that.
• 52:54
  Tracy Cartwright: Yeah, that's what I'm in.
• 52:55
  Tracy Cartwright: That
• 52:56
  Kristina Dryža: and even could be just simply, I don't know, you've got a, the friend, like, I know everyone says Jessica all the time, but you got a friend Jessica, and she's competent in something that you are not competent in.
• 53:03
  Kristina Dryža: I don't know, maybe she can, you know, file taxes really well.
• 53:05
  Kristina Dryža: It's like, well, how would Jessica.
• 53:07
  Kristina Dryža: Like, deal with this, like mountain of emails or whatever it is in front of me.
• 53:09
  Kristina Dryža: It doesn't always have to be, uh, you know, uh, like a mythological figure.
• 53:13
  Kristina Dryža: But some people might go, ah, this is a destruction like Carly, like, you know, the, the goddess Carly.
• 53:19
  Kristina Dryža: Mm-hmm.
• 53:20
  Kristina Dryža: And, uh, ah, ah, yeah.
• 53:21
  Kristina Dryža: And then all of a sudden it's being able to feel into that.
• 53:23
  Kristina Dryža: And I think, again, it's.
• 53:25
  Kristina Dryža: The world.
• 53:26
  Kristina Dryža: It's a feeling universe.
• 53:28
  Kristina Dryža: And I think for those of us with trauma, we've, we're so in our heads 'cause it's trying to make everything safe right through, you know, hypervigilance and planning and all the rest of it.
• 53:36
  Kristina Dryža: But when we can almost say if it's a feeling and a frequency that is almost in a sense how the universe operates and our greatest experience of time or the the trueness of time is synchronicity, we start recognizing the importance of.
• 53:49
  Kristina Dryža: The, how am I showing up in the moment?
• 53:52
  Kristina Dryža: In what frequency?
• 53:53
  Kristina Dryža: In what archetype?
• 53:54
  Kristina Dryža: In what pattern.
• 53:56
  Tracy Cartwright: So how does time traveler fit into that?
• 53:58
  Kristina Dryža: I, I think that there's, um, I, I, again, uh, we can be in the now and we could close our eyes and I was just recently, uh, last year in, um, Delphi in Greece at the Oracle of Delphi, and feel like I could be back in the oracle of Delphi in those times, but still be here in the moment.
• 54:15
  Kristina Dryža: And, um, I think it's also to recognize, uh.
• 54:19
  Kristina Dryža: So often if I think about my own situation, it's the past and my family was something very fixed rather than something that was fluid that could shift in regards to my perception of my relationship of what occurred in the past.
• 54:33
  Kristina Dryža: So there's almost just that capacity that ah, and we can imagine maybe we've got a, a date coming up on the weekend.
• 54:39
  Kristina Dryža: We can, we can imagine how that date would go and there's so many options of which way it would go.
• 54:43
  Kristina Dryža: But to be able to just in hold that there's so many potentialities, you know,
• 54:47
  and which 1: 00 AM I gonna align with?
• 54:50
  Tracy Cartwright: I sometimes work with the time traveler as far as, okay, if I'm stuck on something and I tap into that part of myself, that's like, it's already done it.
• 54:57
  Kristina Dryža: Yeah.
• 54:58
  Kristina Dryža: I need
• 54:58
  Tracy Cartwright: to, I need some help here.
• 54:59
  Tracy Cartwright: You've already done this?
• 55:01
  Tracy Cartwright: Yeah.
• 55:01
  Tracy Cartwright: Be in that part.
• 55:02
  Kristina Dryža: Yeah.
• 55:02
  Kristina Dryža: Act from the position like it's already been done.
• 55:04
  Kristina Dryža: Or like the thing that's blocking you.
• 55:05
  Kristina Dryža: Okay.
• 55:05
  Kristina Dryža: I've gotten over it.
• 55:06
  Kristina Dryža: What was the thing that I like?
• 55:07
  Kristina Dryža: You've already passed it.
• 55:09
  Kristina Dryža: So what's the next thing that you do?
• 55:10
  Kristina Dryža: You just kind of solve it?
• 55:11
  Kristina Dryža: Mm. So I think that there is something of, we could even say, um, 'cause he has just started like the 2026 version of yourself.
• 55:18
  Kristina Dryža: That's very different to the 2025 version of yourself.
• 55:20
  Kristina Dryža: Mm-hmm.
• 55:21
  Kristina Dryža: Maybe the 2026 version of yourself just gets up half an hour early.
• 55:24
  Tracy Cartwright: Yeah.
• 55:25
  Kristina Dryža: And that's already a shift.
• 55:26
  Kristina Dryža: Yeah.
• 55:26
  Tracy Cartwright: Wow, that's fascinating.
• 55:28
  Tracy Cartwright: We could, we could talk about
• 55:29
  Kristina Dryža: Yeah.
• 55:30
  Tracy Cartwright: Eons, right?
• 55:31
  Tracy Cartwright: Eons is so much
• 55:32
  Kristina Dryža: to, I just say that there's, I hope people just get the sense that because I felt powerless for so, so long in my life, um, and hopeless and just, it was just hell and, and just like, almost like, uh, I'm about to turn 49 and I would say I lived 48 and a half of those years in.
• 55:49
  Kristina Dryža: In a hellish underworld to now just be coming out to the light that, um, it's not, now that I see, which is my perspective before I wasted my life or I made all these mistakes and all the rest of it that almost I, I now am in what would kind of be that cliche of it is a new day.
• 56:07
  Kristina Dryža: And how will I be in it?
• 56:09
  Kristina Dryža: And almost that I have the ability to not direct the external circumstances, but how I feel inside so that I feel safe in my own way, just through connecting through my breath.
• 56:23
  Kristina Dryža: Um, that almost in a sense I can cherish myself through in a way, the way that I'm thinking and feeling and acting and feeling and behaving.
• 56:30
  Kristina Dryža: It's not so dependent that things have to go my way.
• 56:32
  Kristina Dryža: I've gotta get all the green lights going on, on, on the way to town, that even if it's red light, red light, red light, I still actually am the one that has held onto a frequency that feels safe and freeing and loving inside of myself.
• 56:44
  Kristina Dryža: So I'm no longer dictated by external circumstances.
• 56:47
  Kristina Dryža: And you'll start feeling more of a creator in your life.
• 56:50
  Kristina Dryža: And.
• 56:51
  Kristina Dryža: I'm told beautiful blessings will start just falling away.
• 56:55
  Tracy Cartwright: I'm gonna celebrate that.
• 56:56
  Tracy Cartwright: Yeah.
• 56:56
  Tracy Cartwright: Arms up.
• 56:56
  Tracy Cartwright: Yeah.
• 56:57
  Tracy Cartwright: Alright.
• 56:57
  Tracy Cartwright: Yeah,
• 56:58
  Kristina Dryža: I
• 56:59
  Tracy Cartwright: did.
• 56:59
  Tracy Cartwright: It's fantastic.
• 57:00
  Kristina Dryža: I get to have breakfast, I get to move my body, I get to sleep, I get to have a friend.
• 57:04
  Kristina Dryža: I get to like all, wow.
• 57:07
  Kristina Dryža: I get to have these things.
• 57:09
  Kristina Dryža: Wow.
• 57:09
  Tracy Cartwright: Yeah.
• 57:10
  Tracy Cartwright: That's just a
• 57:11
  Kristina Dryža: way to be in the world.
• 57:12
  Tracy Cartwright: Oh, you're amazing.
• 57:13
  Tracy Cartwright: You're amazing.
• 57:14
  Tracy Cartwright: Oh,
• 57:14
  Kristina Dryža: likewise.
• 57:14
  Tracy Cartwright: Thank you so much for sharing and we're kind like coming to the end of our time here.
• 57:20
  Tracy Cartwright: For those who I'm just, I'm gonna put it in the thread, but.
• 57:24
  Tracy Cartwright: For those who are auto audio audible, um, can you just share your contact details so they can get in touch with you if they'd like a reading or,
• 57:32
  Kristina Dryža: sure, sure, sure.
• 57:33
  Kristina Dryža: My website is horribly outta Tate, so I kind of say Instagram or YouTube, so on.
• 57:38
  Kristina Dryža: Um.
• 57:39
  Kristina Dryža: Instagram, it's K-R-I-S-T-I-N-A, surname, D-R-Y-Z-A.
• 57:44
  Kristina Dryža: And uh, you can just find my name also on YouTube or on um, LinkedIn.
• 57:48
  Kristina Dryža: And um, if you want to do reading, just message me for a reading.
• 57:51
  Kristina Dryža: I can go to more into cost, process time, things like that.
• 57:55
  Kristina Dryža: Um, but otherwise I do, um, like putting content out in regards to just short little snippets of archetypal mythic wisdom, a minute or so little reels, um, that people might enjoy too.
• 58:08
  Tracy Cartwright: Yeah, they're great.
• 58:09
  Tracy Cartwright: Highly recommend them.
• 58:10
  Kristina Dryža: Thank you.
• 58:11
  Tracy Cartwright: Well, thank you so much, Christina.
• 58:12
  Tracy Cartwright: It's been a pleasure.
• 58:14
  Tracy Cartwright: Um, like I say, I could be just, we could just chat for, we could.
• 58:18
  Tracy Cartwright: It's just so good.
• 58:19
  Tracy Cartwright: So good.
• 58:19
  Tracy Cartwright: Yeah.
• 58:19
  Kristina Dryža: Brilliant.
• 58:20
  Kristina Dryža: Alright, well might love to all your, uh, viewers and listeners and, um, gosh, all I can say is, please, you know, if I look at it archetypally, um, with Pandora, hope is always, it, it never leaves you.
• 58:32
  Kristina Dryža: Um, but almost once you realize that you are the answer to your own prayer, then you become the answer to others, prayers to the planet's, prayers to the gods and the gods' prayers, and you will move through the world like a soul.
• 58:46
  Kristina Dryža: Empowered.
• 58:47
  Tracy Cartwright: Wow, not a true word has been said.
• 58:49
  Tracy Cartwright: Beautiful.
• 58:50
  Kristina Dryža: Thank you.
• 58:52
  Tracy Cartwright: Thank you for listening.
• 58:53
  Tracy Cartwright: Head over to Instagram and tell me what's resonated for you with this episode.
• 58:58
  Tracy Cartwright: You'll find me at Tracy dot Cartwright.
• 59:01
  Tracy Cartwright: That's Tracy with no e Cartwright, and or head over to my website, Tracy cartwright.co.nz and receive a free audio with the gift from your ancestors.
• 59:12
  Tracy Cartwright: So until next time, be kind to yourself and have fun doing it.