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Transcript

Overcoming Holiday Hurdles with Intention and Care · Start Your Comeback: Rebuilding after Divorce, Empty Nest, and Loss of Spouse

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Is there a major life transition benching you?
• 0:02
  Speaker 1: I know you may be asking what's next?
• 0:06
  Speaker 1: What's my purpose?
• 0:07
  Speaker 1: What if?
• 0:08
  Speaker 1: Because I've asked those too.
• 0:12
  Speaker 1: Welcome to the Start your Comeback Podcast.
• 0:14
  Speaker 1: I'm Toni Thrash, a certified life coach, and I want to share the tools and practical steps to help you create a winning game plan to move into your new adventure.
• 0:25
  Speaker 1: Welcome back, You're listening to episode eight of the Start your Comeback podcast.
• 1:04
  Speaker 1: I'm so grateful you're here.
• 1:06
  Speaker 1: I know you won't believe me, but you are on your way to your comeback.
• 1:12
  Speaker 1: How you ask?
• 1:14
  Speaker 1: You have officially crossed the first hurdle in making it through your first holiday.
• 1:19
  Speaker 1: The next two holidays are maybe the biggest and the hardest, but you have taken the first step.
• 1:27
  Speaker 1: I want you to pause a moment and realize that you have taken some of your ground back.
• 1:33
  Speaker 1: Some of the time you have lost is being made up.
• 1:37
  Speaker 1: It may be small, but it is progress.
• 1:40
  Speaker 1: This is the beginning of your new beginnings.
• 1:44
  Speaker 1: Every step you take is a wonderful move in the direction of new.
• 1:48
  Speaker 1: It's normal if you barely made it through.
• 1:52
  Speaker 1: It's even okay to cry and fall apart as you realize this first step is finally over.
• 1:58
  Speaker 1: Okay for your kids to see some of the tears released.
• 2:06
  Speaker 1: They need to see in real time the grief you're experiencing, because this gives them the permission to grieve as well.
• 2:10
  Speaker 1: However, let's not overdo it.
• 2:14
  Speaker 1: You see too much of this and your kids become your caretaker, slash, counselor, and this is not what you want.
• 2:21
  Speaker 1: Save those times for your life coach or pastor or even your inner circle.
• 2:27
  Speaker 1: It's important for your kids to see you are human and grieving, but not okay to have them turn into your go-to person.
• 2:36
  Speaker 1: One of my biggest suggestions is to spoil yourself just a little.
• 2:40
  Speaker 1: Just a little.
• 2:48
  Speaker 1: Depending on your budget.
• 2:49
  Speaker 1: That can mean a small reward dinner, an extra trip through Starbucks, a movie or maybe taking a trip while your kids are with their other parent.
• 2:55
  Speaker 1: It's okay to splurge, but do it with the mindset that you will not go into debt.
• 3:01
  Speaker 1: Celebrating it's crucial that you recognize the fact you have made it through.
• 3:05
  Speaker 1: It sometimes will give you the adrenaline rush you need to even prepare for Christmas and New Year's.
• 3:13
  Speaker 1: Take advantage, but always with the end results that your kids are happy and and that you are happy.
• 3:21
  Speaker 1: I love planning Christmas for my grown kids and all the cooking that goes along with it.
• 3:25
  Speaker 1: I make homemade manicotti every year and I've now taught my youngest son and my daughter-in-law how to make it.
• 3:33
  Speaker 1: We do it together, listening to Christmas music, making chocolate chip cookies to munch on.
• 3:40
  Speaker 1: If you are a planner by nature, like yours truly here, it helps to take your mind off of being alone, but gives you a sense of purpose.
• 3:50
  Speaker 1: Now I want to talk to you about expectations.
• 3:54
  Speaker 1: For just a minute.
• 3:55
  Speaker 1: Have zero Well, only have them for your time with your kids.
• 4:02
  Speaker 1: Hold them loosely, because who knows what did or will happen with their other parent.
• 4:08
  Speaker 1: Prepare just like normal for seeing lights, grabbing hot chocolate, watching Christmas movies and being in your PJs all day long.
• 4:17
  Speaker 1: If this will make you and your kids happy Because by my estimation, you have about 33 days until the new year I want to suggest to you that you can do anything for that amount of time.
• 4:29
  Speaker 1: It will have its challenges, but the joy that you will have will be awesome and you will be one step closer to making it through the loneliest time of year, because you chose to focus on yourself and your time with your kids.
• 4:45
  Speaker 1: You've got this.
• 4:48
  Speaker 1: Now I want to leave you with an action step today.
• 4:51
  Speaker 1: If you do not have support during the holidays and need someone to walk you through it.
• 4:56
  Speaker 1: I want you to go to TonyThrashcom, fill in a request and leave me a message for a discovery call, Totally free, and plus I want to give you a free 30-minute coaching session.
• 5:10
  Speaker 1: You can also DM me at Tony Thrash on Instagram Because, you see, I really want to help you with a game plan to succeed during the holidays.
• 5:20
  Speaker 1: So you get a free 15-minute discovery call plus a 30-minute free coaching session.
• 5:28
  Speaker 1: And one last thing if you're afraid, I get that.
• 5:33
  Speaker 1: I struggle with fear on a daily basis, but what have you got to lose other than 45 minutes?
• 5:40
  Speaker 1: Do not let fear be the winning opponent today.
• 5:43
  Speaker 1: Take a chance and see how your holidays might benefit from this time.
• 5:50
  Speaker 1: Thanks for being here Next week.
• 5:52
  Speaker 1: Tune in as I talk about five ways you, as a friend, can help during a period of transition.
• 5:58
  Speaker 1: We all have someone walking through something and we're not quite sure what to say or to do, or even if we should do something.
• 6:09
  Speaker 1: I will have five ways.
• 6:11
  Speaker 1: You can be there for them.
• 6:13
  Speaker 1: Happy December Eve.
• 6:15
  Speaker 1: Hey, thanks for listening.
• 6:18
  Speaker 1: I don't take it for granted that you're here.
• 6:20
  Speaker 1: You didn't listen by mistake.
• 6:22
  Speaker 1: If you want to reach out, you can DM me on Instagram at Tony Thrash Until next week.
• 6:29
  Speaker 1: Remember there's still time left on the clock.
• 6:32
  Speaker 1: Let's get you off the bench to start your comeback.
• 6:35
  Speaker 1: I want to give a special shout out to Country Club for the original music.
• 6:40
  Speaker 1: You can find them on Instagram at country club.