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April 12 - Sober Thinking · The Daily Ripples Podcast

• 0:02
  Hey everybody, this is the Daily Ripple.
• 0:05
  Today is April 12th.
• 0:08
  Back here with Zach and Bill.
• 0:12
  Action. The stone.
• 0:13
  The stone.
• 0:14
  When destructive patterns rule my thinking,
• 0:17
  I lose the ability to choose wisely.
• 0:19
  What feels normal in the moment can slowly distort judgment
• 0:22
  and lead me away from truth.
• 0:24
  Ripple 1. Practical.
• 0:25
  Today I will pause before acting on impulse.
• 0:29
  I will examine my thoughts and ask whether they are grounded in reality or driven by fear,
• 0:36
  crowd, or habit. Honest reflection helps me recover the freedom to choose what is right.
• 0:42
  Ripple 2 Spiritual
• 0:44
  As I follow the example of Christ and submit my mind to the Father, the Holy Spirit renews my thinking.
• 0:52
  Clarity begins to replace confusion, and wisdom grows where impulse once ruled.
• 0:57
  Over time, my decisions become steadier because they are rooted in truth rather than compulsion.
• 1:05
  I just realized what the stone is.
• 1:08
  What do you mean?
• 1:09
  It's what's creating the ripples.
• 1:12
  Oh, the stone that's dropped in the water and then the ripples are produced by the stone being dropped.
• 1:20
  Because you throw in the snow.
• 1:22
  Brilliant.
• 1:23
  Okay, so I totally have to jump in here with the power of technology and edits to say that it is so satisfying to hear Zach finally get what the stone was.
• 1:37
  Anyway, back to our regularly scheduled pro-cham. Enjoy.
• 1:42
  I don't like this one. I don't like disruptive patterns rule my thinking.
• 1:47
  But let me reframe that, please, before you go off on it.
• 1:50
  I'm with you. I don't particularly enjoy the language, but let me flip it just to see where we can go with this.
• 1:57
  I was thinking about past experience.
• 2:01
  In Alcoholics Anonymous, we have the assistance on page 51-ish.
• 2:06
  It says something about we were prey to misery and depression.
• 2:11
  And because of my past experience, where I have assumed I was powerless over my actions or at times drinking to escape an obsession beyond my control, couldn't do certain things in my life.
• 2:25
  And based on having 20 years of experience of that, I live in that.
• 2:30
  That is what my future is determined by, by past experience, until I develop new.
• 2:37
  So I wouldn't call it destructive patterns.
• 2:39
  I would just call it past experience, which my patterns, ultimately, and we use the, it says thinking here, my patterns, my past experience, my memory is my thinking.
• 2:51
  It's what determines the filter through which I interact with you.
• 2:55
  And I think that's what this is talking about, where I had a back injury and I was at work and I was sitting down all the time and I was trying to get workman's comp and all this stuff.
• 3:06
  And I called doctors and I called everybody and I was talking to my sponsor and I was like, man, these people, they're just not going to do for me what I want them to do.
• 3:14
  And he said, let me ask you a question.
• 3:18
  How did you approach the lady?
• 3:21
  What did you say to her?
• 3:21
  I said, well, I just called her and told her what I needed.
• 3:24
  And he said, well, have you ever considered calling her and saying, good morning?
• 3:31
  And I think I've been acting and living in that way based on my past experience.
• 3:37
  And that's all I knew up into that.
• 3:40
  And I'd been driven by my persona, however you want to call it.
• 3:46
  I had no idea that there was a different way to approach a situation.
• 3:50
  And I think that's what it means by, I assume the worst is going to come out of a job interview.
• 3:56
  We talk a lot about how I have these insecurities of work around me.
• 4:00
  secretly think I'm not doing a good enough job, you know, and no one's going to tell me.
• 4:04
  And I would venture to call that a destructive pattern.
• 4:08
  What's your argument?
• 4:10
  Well, I don't have an—I just don't particularly like the idea of my faint—
• 4:16
  It pathologizes you into basically suffering.
• 4:20
  Yeah, but I can get down with what he's saying and that prior to growing spiritually, those things did rule my thinking.
• 4:33
  Like what you did ruled my thinking.
• 4:37
  Today, the difference for me today is that what you can do can still rule my thinking.
• 4:44
  But prior to where I'm at now with it, is that would have ruled my actions too.
• 4:50
  because I would not have been able to act a good purpose
• 4:53
  or I would have, you know,
• 4:55
  if my destructive patterns would have been acting out
• 5:00
  versus, you know, I can have thoughts
• 5:03
  because my thoughts are not,
• 5:04
  and we've talked about this before,
• 5:06
  like I'm powerless over my thoughts.
• 5:08
  Like they're not originating from it.
• 5:11
  They can just come up on their own.
• 5:13
  You know, I could be sitting on a beach
• 5:15
  in perfect peace and harmony
• 5:17
  and start thinking about, well, you know,
• 5:20
  did I, you know, I got to get home or when I get home, I've got to cut that one piece of the yard
• 5:26
  out because it's going to get in. There's no reason for me to think about it. It just shows up,
• 5:30
  but I can still act a good purpose today. Even when I'm not, my thinking may not be on par with
• 5:36
  my actions. Well, I'm not run by my thoughts anymore. Like I used to be right. You know,
• 5:42
  and some people that are, you know, new to this sometimes can be run by their thoughts too.
• 5:47
  You know, I asked you a question not too long ago, and I said, hey, you ever thought about an inventory?
• 5:55
  And, you know, you said, no, you know, something, you had this excuse.
• 5:59
  I mean, it wasn't, no, they're not excuses, they're reasons.
• 6:02
  Yeah, it's reasons that you decide that you can have a dubious luxury and you're not like, you're like most people.
• 6:07
  And, you know, for me, you know, I just went through another inventory around some things that you like to, you know, particularly are very driven in.
• 6:17
  and I found freedom for that.
• 6:19
  And so when, you know, you might not say this is destructive.
• 6:22
  Well, what's destructive, right?
• 6:24
  I don't know what's destructive, but I know what I've caused harm in.
• 6:28
  We can put punctuation on that just by the, in 86th or 88,
• 6:33
  where it says, we're not being inspired at all times.
• 6:37
  Right.
• 6:37
  That's it.
• 6:38
  Simple.
• 6:39
  You know this.
• 6:40
  Bill is an original thought factory.
• 6:42
  Yes.
• 6:43
  Well, really glad when it happened.
• 6:45
  So, you know, that was good.
• 6:46
  That was good.
• 6:47
  The dreadful action is to pause before acting.
• 6:52
  That was amazing.
• 6:53
  This says I will examine my thoughts.
• 6:55
  But I think then what important part for me is to ask God to direct my thinking
• 7:01
  and not spend a lot of time thinking about my own thoughts.
• 7:05
  You know, I mean, that's...
• 7:06
  I think, too, like where it says the pause, like for me,
• 7:09
  so we start talking about the pause and like when in the from a day to day approach,
• 7:14
  You know, I look at that back.
• 7:17
  A friend of mine, David R., and I were meeting at one point in time.
• 7:20
  We were talking about just different stuff.
• 7:22
  And we were talking about the 86 through 88.
• 7:26
  And we got to that point, and he was like, you know, when it says positive agitators are doubtful,
• 7:32
  I like to look at that as the key, as the cue to go look at the spot check inventory, the 84, right?
• 7:41
  Because some of the characteristics of being agitated or doubtful or resentment, fear, whatever those items are on page 84,
• 7:51
  and that the way I clear them up ultimately is to turn my thoughts to those I could be helpful for, too, you know.
• 7:57
  But that kind of gives me that pause.
• 8:00
  It gives me something to do in the pause versus, you know.
• 8:04
  Let's pray for intuitive thought.
• 8:06
  I mean, I'm thinking about the framing this for someone who has limited experience or on the verge.
• 8:14
  If someone is actively, their thinking is actively ruled by destructive patterns, what do I do?
• 8:21
  Take a decref, pause, ask God to direct your next action.
• 8:25
  Right.
• 8:26
  I got how he done.
• 8:28
  Right.
• 8:28
  Not as in any time as you sit down with your notebook.
• 8:31
  This is, I'm on the job site, and this mother, you know, has done this thing.
• 8:37
  And I'm accustomed to letting people know what they've done there.
• 8:40
  At least I was, right?
• 8:42
  And so what was necessary for me?
• 8:45
  Now you just let me know when they do.
• 8:47
  Right, well, that's right.
• 8:48
  That's how this works.
• 8:50
  Just so you know.
• 8:52
  I'm learning.
• 8:53
  He didn't answer the other day, and a lot of big things that happened.
• 8:57
  It was funny because I go get blood because I do the TRT stuff, right?
• 9:03
  Right.
• 9:05
  And so I say I go get blood.
• 9:09
  I thought you were gloating on how much of service you are.
• 9:13
  Like you were going to say, I get blood for…
• 9:15
  No, no, no.
• 9:16
  This is the better, too.
• 9:18
  No, it is better.
• 9:22
  So I gave blood.
• 9:23
  I've done it once because the guy downstairs quit working.
• 9:26
  and the doctors that they said on whatever said you might want to get blood because your blood's
• 9:33
  thick and so i uh i gave blood and then i was going to go do it again because i wanted to get
• 9:39
  on a schedule doing and they said you have been permanently deferred from giving blood
• 9:46
  hand home so i i looked up the reasons why you get permanently deferred and they're you know they
• 9:52
  You got the three letters behind them, right?
• 9:54
  And the big three letters, not like the small, like, you know, it's capital.
• 9:59
  And then the first thought I had was I'm going to have to move.
• 10:04
  The second thought I have is going to be, was I can't tell anyone.
• 10:11
  The third thought I had was I got to give it to my significant other.
• 10:16
  And the fourth one was, you know, I'm going to bring God into this.
• 10:22
  Then somewhere was in there was I'm going to try to call my sponsor.
• 10:28
  He didn't answer.
• 10:30
  And at certain times, the alcoholic has no mental defense.
• 10:34
  But anyway, so then after I brought God into this thing, right,
• 10:38
  because I'm thinking the worst right now.
• 10:41
  Sure.
• 10:42
  I call the people.
• 10:43
  And that's something.
• 10:45
  He bought me.
• 10:49
  So I called this lady and she was like, hey, you know, because you're like, hey, WebND did it before you just called him and asked him why.
• 10:55
  Because, yeah, but scared, right?
• 10:57
  I don't want to find out bad information.
• 10:58
  And they're like, oh, you're Corey with a C?
• 11:00
  That was Corey with a K.
• 11:02
  I'm sorry.
• 11:03
  They said, you know, because you take the TRTs, you can come up false positive for hepatitis A, but you're good.
• 11:11
  And I said, I'm good.
• 11:13
  She said, I just changed it in the system.
• 11:15
  You can go get blood whenever you want.
• 11:17
  But, you know, but we were talking about when you bring God into it, right?
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  You know, because for me, sometimes it's all that matters.
• 11:23
  Sometimes I can bring God into it, especially when it's every...
• 11:25
  I want to keep saying destructive patterns.
• 11:27
  So your destructive pattern is to think the worst.
• 11:30
  Right.
• 11:31
  And then in that moment, be ruled by your thinking.
• 11:34
  Yeah.
• 11:34
  But then, you know, over time, like, you know, sometimes when it's, you know, not as bad, right?
• 11:41
  You know, it's easy for me to bring God immediately.
• 11:44
  Right then.
• 11:44
  And, you know, God, it says, because it says, you know, at once we ask God to remove.
• 11:49
  Oh, yeah.
• 11:49
  At once.
• 11:50
  Not the third thought, not the fourth thought.
• 11:53
  You know, but when I started, but, you know, on other simple matters, it's easy to say, you know, hey, God, remove this.
• 12:01
  But, you know, when those big things happen, you know, it was the fourth thought, but, you know, at least it came in there.
• 12:07
  Because I used to, I would have been driven, and I would have drove my road to Arkansas and not look back.
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  right
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  right
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  is that where you're
• 12:15
  going to move
• 12:16
  no
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  that's just another
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  stay
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  it's not that far away
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  though
• 12:20
  yeah I wanted to get
• 12:21
  far away
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  it's a great thought
• 12:22
  somewhere south
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  I think though
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  I mean
• 12:27
  the more we apply
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  the more we
• 12:29
  there's nothing
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  you don't want to go
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  that's what I'm saying
• 12:31
  that was very
• 12:31
  it was the way
• 12:32
  we saw
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  if you're going to go
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  to our
• 12:34
  he's enjoying
• 12:35
  Bill on the beach
• 12:36
  and thought about
• 12:36
  cutting his grass
• 12:37
  with him
• 12:37
  right
• 12:38
  yeah you could have
• 12:38
  done that
• 12:39
  I think though
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  that the spiritual
• 12:41
  part of this
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  you know
• 12:43
  is that
• 12:43
  Over time, that clarity that you have, like, I'm a working part of mine, maybe I'm a working part of mine.
• 12:51
  It says here, clarity begins to replace confusion, which the way we would say that is it becomes a working part of mine.
• 12:58
  We become able to trust it.
• 13:00
  So we go from, I may have talked about this once or twice, but we go from not being able to depend on our philosophy for life,
• 13:11
  our thinking and the way we approach things to read to through through the wrong hand of this
• 13:17
  side. Exactly. Through the process of being able to rely on our thinking and intuitive thought we
• 13:23
  come to rely on our thinking as opposed to not rely. That's why you don't want to strip the parents.
• 13:31
  It's the same way we've talked about when we first met. I was talking about praying the third step
• 13:35
  prayer daily. You probably got it. So when I asked, and you asked God to remove your deficiencies
• 13:43
  and which you pointed out, and I'm with this. I agree with you. Why would I pray for difficulties?
• 13:49
  Why am I praying to have difficulties? And so why would I pathologize myself into suffering?
• 13:56
  Why would I wake up each morning and ask to have problems? I understand there's room for growth and
• 14:02
  That's what happens.
• 14:03
  But there's also another context where we can offer ourselves in 86 through 88 is a prime example of how I can offer myself to God and expect to experience indecision.
• 14:15
  It's not a problem.
• 14:16
  It's just a place where I get to pause and ask God for more help.
• 14:19
  Well, you know, it depends on how you look at it, too, because if you want to get it, you know, because what's the difficulty?
• 14:26
  What's the difficulty?
• 14:27
  This is my view.
• 14:28
  Right.
• 14:28
  No.
• 14:29
  But what's the difficulty?
• 14:30
  I'm advocating good.
• 14:31
  what if I'm just removing me and trying to let God be there?
• 14:35
  Because if I'm the difficulty and I want the, you know, God's right here.
• 14:38
  I'm just, I want me removed.
• 14:41
  You know, you could say, you know, yeah, you know, difficulty at that moment.
• 14:45
  Because one way I looked at the third step prayer was,
• 14:48
  my difficulty is what's in my life, the human problems.
• 14:52
  But if I'm just trying to remove self.
• 14:54
  Oh, right.
• 14:55
  When I was praying it regularly, it was just, I don't want to feel bad today.
• 15:01
  but do take away anything that's going to cause me emotional response at all.
• 15:05
  See, I agree with still saying.
• 15:08
  I mean, I like what's on 86, 87, 88, but I do like the seven-step prayer
• 15:11
  because I know what it means, too.
• 15:14
  But those prayers are bookends.
• 15:20
  We had this conversation before.
• 15:23
  But in the third-step prayer, you're asking to take away my dip pulleys
• 15:27
  to stand in my way as they would show others of thy power, thy love, and thy way of life.
• 15:34
  Remove me in the bond of the self, right?
• 15:36
  But in the seventh step prayer, it says, I'm now willing that you have all of me.
• 15:41
  See, it doesn't say that in the third step prayer.
• 15:45
  So in the third step prayer, you're only saying, take away my difficulties.
• 15:48
  And in the seventh step prayer, you're saying, I'm now willing that you have all of me.
• 15:53
  But see, I still have no cards. And you might be completely free of no cards. Well, I ran out of amends to make, but I still got amends to make. I still have out there amends. What would we say? In debt amends or whatever that is.
• 16:09
  But your bidding, to me, when I wake up in the morning and say the bidding part, I want to be standing, not crawling, right?
• 16:20
  And be willing to make amends wherever I have the man.
• 16:24
  We have that.
• 16:24
  So Ralph and I have had similar discussions.
• 16:28
  And my personal perspective is, you know, one through nine, you know, 10, 11, and 12, keep me out of one through nine.
• 16:40
  so you're you're exempt you don't i'm not because 10 11 and 12 encompass all of the other steps
• 16:46
  they're the design for living they're the they're the prayer meditation self-examination restitution
• 16:52
  for wrongs done and and the culmination of all those things well i just did an inventory just
• 16:58
  to do it with it because i was taking another guy through an inventory yeah that sounds horrible
• 17:03
  right i guess you're cool with you don't have to do that anymore oh my pillow's pretty soft
• 17:08
  Well, it is now because you're coughing too.
• 17:11
  Yeah, well, I'd call either way.
• 17:13
  The promise is that if you continue, remarkable things will happen.
• 17:19
  If you follow the example of Christ and submit your mind to the Father,
• 17:23
  the Holy Spirit renews your thinking.
• 17:25
  And clarity will replace confusion and wisdom grows where impulse once rules,
• 17:32
  which has been my experience.
• 17:33
  I've seen myself act in a way that was contradictory to what I would have once considered to be my nature.
• 17:40
  Over time, my decisions become more steady because they are rooted in truth rather than compulsion or out of fear,
• 17:48
  has directed by past experience or memory.
• 17:52
  And that's through conscious, daily conscious contact with God in some fashion, whether it be three or 11 or seven.
• 18:00
  You know, I think what his wife says is cool because, you know, if any of this work is spiritual by nature, right, any of them.
• 18:08
  I said, you know, if I'm doing something spiritual, is it really wrong?
• 18:12
  Or is it just not right into terms of what someone else believes?
• 18:15
  And so I think the difference in perspective is all geared towards who it's going to be able to help you to be better suited to help.
• 18:22
  And you know what I'm saying?
• 18:24
  Like you speak a language, I speak a language, he speaks a language.
• 18:27
  and that positions us better to help certain people.
• 18:33
  In James 1.5, it says,
• 18:34
  if any of you lacks wisdom
• 18:37
  and should ask God who gives generously
• 18:40
  to all without finding fault,
• 18:42
  and it will be given to you.
• 18:45
  Yeah, I thought that was interesting.
• 18:47
  Anyways, what were you about to say?
• 18:50
  More close with the prayer?
• 18:51
  Yeah, we did it.
• 18:53
  I think we're done.
• 18:53
  Father, renew my mind today
• 18:56
  through your spirit.
• 18:56
  Help me recognize distorted thinking
• 18:59
  and guide me to walk in the wisdom and freedom
• 19:01
  that come from following your son.
• 19:03
  Amen.
• 19:04
  This is amen.