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1. We Didn't Plan For This: So...This is the Plan Now · We Didn't Plan for This Podcast

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_00: Welcome to We Didn't Plan for This, which feels like a pretty appropriate name for a podcast that was never actually supposed to become its own podcast.
• 0:10
  SPEAKER_00: But here we are.
• 0:12
  SPEAKER_00: If you've been listening to us over on how yoga changed my life, you already know a little bit about how we got here.
• 0:18
  SPEAKER_00: And if you're brand new, hi.
• 0:21
  SPEAKER_00: I'm Adrian.
• 0:23
  SPEAKER_00: You have absolutely no idea what you've walked into.
• 0:26
  SPEAKER_00: Neither do we.
• 0:28
  SPEAKER_00: So we're already in this together.
• 0:31
  SPEAKER_00: We didn't plan for this, started as a series about those moments in life when everything changes.
• 0:36
  SPEAKER_00: Sometimes they're huge moments.
• 0:39
  SPEAKER_00: Someone dies, you get a diagnosis, a relationship ends, you lose a job, or you suddenly find yourself living a life that looks absolutely nothing like the one you thought you were building.
• 0:54
  SPEAKER_00: And sometimes it's not just one giant thing that happens.
• 0:58
  SPEAKER_00: It can be 27 smaller things that somehow all happen on the same Tuesday.
• 1:04
  SPEAKER_00: And suddenly you're standing there in your kitchen thinking, what the fuck just happened in my life?
• 1:11
  SPEAKER_00: Well, that's this podcast.
• 1:13
  SPEAKER_00: I didn't wake up one morning and think, you know what would be fun?
• 1:16
  SPEAKER_00: Let's start a podcast about grief, uncertainty, money, parenting, getting old, starting over, and the complete collapse of our illusion of control.
• 1:25
  SPEAKER_00: That would have been a weird business plan for sure.
• 1:29
  SPEAKER_00: This show came from living it.
• 1:32
  SPEAKER_00: My husband Brian died unexpectedly in January.
• 1:35
  SPEAKER_00: And there was my life before January 10th.
• 1:38
  SPEAKER_00: And then there was my life after it.
• 1:42
  SPEAKER_00: I didn't plan to become a widow.
• 1:45
  SPEAKER_00: I didn't plan to face financial crisis.
• 1:48
  SPEAKER_00: I didn't plan to have conversations about mortgages and debt and estates while I was still trying to understand how my person could simply not be here anymore.
• 2:00
  SPEAKER_00: I didn't plan to watch my daughters grieve their dad while I was trying to figure out how to be their mom in an entirely different life.
• 2:08
  SPEAKER_00: I didn't plan for the loneliness, widow brain, and I for sure didn't plan how weird grief would be.
• 2:18
  SPEAKER_00: I didn't plan for some of the things that have made me laugh during the worst year of my life.
• 2:27
  SPEAKER_00: Well, that's the thing I've learned.
• 2:29
  SPEAKER_00: None of us really know what's coming.
• 2:32
  SPEAKER_00: But we make plans anyway.
• 2:34
  SPEAKER_00: We make five-year plans, retirement plans, college plans, vacation plans, meal plans, financial plans.
• 2:43
  SPEAKER_00: We put shit in our calendar six months from now, like we have personally negotiated a contract with the universe.
• 2:50
  SPEAKER_00: And then life says, that's adorable.
• 2:56
  SPEAKER_00: What is this show really about, though?
• 2:59
  SPEAKER_00: I don't want this to be a podcast just about grief because we didn't plan for this is bigger than what happened just to me.
• 3:07
  SPEAKER_00: It's about what happens to all of us.
• 3:09
  SPEAKER_00: It's a diagnosis you didn't expect, a friendship that disappeared, a body that suddenly doesn't work the way it used to.
• 3:18
  SPEAKER_00: Or it's your career that stops making sense.
• 3:22
  SPEAKER_00: It may be a move, debt, an emptiness, menopause, or rejection.
• 3:30
  SPEAKER_00: It's also the good stuff we didn't plan for, too.
• 3:34
  SPEAKER_00: The person you accidentally met, the opportunity you almost said no to, the friendship you never expected, or a second chance.
• 3:47
  SPEAKER_00: The completely different life that somehow turns out to be beautiful.
• 3:53
  SPEAKER_00: Because we didn't plan for this doesn't automatically mean something terrible happened.
• 3:58
  SPEAKER_00: Sometimes the thing you didn't plan for becomes the thing that changes everything.
• 4:04
  SPEAKER_00: And then there are the people.
• 4:17
  SPEAKER_00: And occasionally completely fucking baffling.
• 4:22
  SPEAKER_00: Which is why you're also going to hear conversations that we like to call people be peopling.
• 4:28
  SPEAKER_00: Because people really do.
• 4:30
  SPEAKER_00: We tell our entire life story to our hairdresser or our trainer.
• 4:35
  SPEAKER_00: We confess things to the stranger sitting next to us on an airplane that we haven't told people we've known for 20 years.
• 4:42
  SPEAKER_00: We say bizarre things at funerals, or we behave really strangely at gyms.
• 4:48
  SPEAKER_00: We even overshare with bartenders.
• 4:52
  SPEAKER_00: And we tell people things that they did not ask to know sometimes.
• 4:57
  SPEAKER_00: Yet somehow, underneath all those ridiculous human interactions, there are stories.
• 5:04
  SPEAKER_00: So we're going to tell those two.
• 5:08
  SPEAKER_00: What I want this podcast to feel like, I don't want it to feel like it's me sitting behind a microphone and pretending I've gotten everything in my life figured out because I sure haven't.
• 5:20
  SPEAKER_00: Not even close.
• 5:22
  SPEAKER_00: I don't want this to be one of those shows where somebody survives something difficult and then comes back six years later with a perfectly packaged lesson about how everything happened for a reason.
• 5:34
  SPEAKER_00: Sometimes I don't know the reason.
• 5:36
  SPEAKER_00: Sometimes there isn't one.
• 5:38
  SPEAKER_00: Sometimes things just suck.
• 5:40
  SPEAKER_00: And I think we're allowed to say that.
• 5:43
  SPEAKER_00: I want to talk about things while they're still messy, while we're still figuring them out.
• 5:50
  SPEAKER_00: There will be incredible people's stories, conversations with my friends, probably some inappropriate laughter.
• 5:57
  SPEAKER_00: And yes, there absolutely will be swearing.
• 6:02
  SPEAKER_00: There will be moments when somebody says something and the rest of us go, wait, what the fuck?
• 6:10
  SPEAKER_00: And there will be stories that remind you that whenever weird chapter you're living in right now, you're probably not the only one.
• 6:21
  SPEAKER_00: So why is this podcast on its own now?
• 6:25
  SPEAKER_00: For those of you who came here from How Yoga Changed My Life, thank you.
• 6:29
  SPEAKER_00: Truly thank you.
• 6:30
  SPEAKER_00: That podcast opened a door I never expected.
• 6:34
  SPEAKER_00: It taught me how powerful it can be when someone sits down and tells the truth about their life.
• 6:40
  SPEAKER_00: But somewhere along the way, these conversations started becoming something of their own.
• 6:47
  SPEAKER_00: They weren't always about yoga.
• 6:49
  SPEAKER_00: They were more about being a human, resilience, starting over, grief, family and friendships, and all the strange, funny, painful things that happen when life doesn't follow the script.
• 7:08
  SPEAKER_00: So instead of trying to make those conversations fit somewhere they didn't quite belong anymore, we gave them their own home, like this one.
• 7:19
  SPEAKER_00: And there's one question I want to start asking people on the show What happened in your life that you never planned for?
• 7:28
  SPEAKER_00: Not necessarily the worst thing, but just the thing that changed the direction.
• 7:34
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe you can point directly to it, or maybe you're living through it right now.
• 7:40
  SPEAKER_00: We want those stories.
• 7:42
  SPEAKER_00: Because the more people I've talked to, the more I've realized something.
• 7:46
  SPEAKER_00: Almost nobody is living the exact life they thought they'd be living.
• 7:52
  SPEAKER_00: We're all improvising a little bit.
• 7:55
  SPEAKER_00: Some of us are just better at pretending we're not.
• 8:00
  SPEAKER_00: So this is episode one.
• 8:02
  SPEAKER_00: Technically, and I have no idea where exactly this podcast is going to go, which seems pretty fucking appropriate.
• 8:12
  SPEAKER_00: If you're listening because your own life didn't go according to plan, welcome.
• 8:18
  SPEAKER_00: If you're in the middle of something you never saw coming, welcome.
• 8:23
  SPEAKER_00: If you've made it through something and can finally laugh about the parts of it, then definitely welcome.
• 8:31
  SPEAKER_00: And if you have a story that makes you say, you are not going to believe what happened, we really want to hear those stories.
• 8:40
  SPEAKER_00: So you can email us at wdpftpodcast at gmail.com.
• 8:46
  SPEAKER_00: Again, that's wdpftpodcast at gmail.com and tell us what didn't you plan for?
• 8:55
  SPEAKER_00: And if someone came to mind while listening, send them this episode.
• 9:00
  SPEAKER_00: Follow, rate, review, and share.
• 9:02
  SPEAKER_00: We didn't plan for this to help more people find their way here.
• 9:07
  SPEAKER_00: Because nobody really knows what's coming.
• 9:10
  SPEAKER_00: So this is the plan now.
• 9:14
  SPEAKER_00: We didn't plan for this, but we're here.
• 9:18
  SPEAKER_00: New episodes Tuesdays.