Latest / Rock My Finances / How to turn loss into triumph and become boss woman. Guest Dena Betti

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How to turn loss into triumph and become boss woman. Guest Dena Betti · Rock My Finances

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  Speaker 1: Unless specifically indicated otherwise. The content expressed or my views only,
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  Speaker 1: and not necessarily those of Life Co Asset Management LLC.
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  Speaker 1: The content presented is in no way in investment advice,
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  Speaker 1: solcination or an offer to sell securities or investment advisory services.
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  Speaker 1: The material is provided for general information and educational purposes
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  Speaker 1: based upon publicly available information from sources believed to be reliable.
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  Speaker 1: I cannot assure the accuracy or completeness of these materials.
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  Speaker 1: As such, the information in these materials may change at
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  Speaker 1: any time without notice. Reference to these discussions about eels
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  Speaker 1: and annuities or fixed insurance products. Investments on fixed insurance
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  Speaker 1: products are different from investments in the stock market, and
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  Speaker 1: the guarantees provided by a fixed insurance product cannot be
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  Speaker 1: assumed to be guaranteed for any other investment.
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  Speaker 2: Welcome to the Rock My Finances show on KFOHD Radio
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  Speaker 2: and Talk for TV, where we put the fund in
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  Speaker 2: finance joint powerhouse Jeffer Jos CDFA CMC and Private Wealth Advisor,
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  Speaker 2: as she collaborates with you to create clarity, control and
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  Speaker 2: confidence with your money, your way. It's not about the zeros,
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  Speaker 2: So what is it all about? Let's find out.
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  Speaker 1: Now.
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  Speaker 2: Here's your host and weekly friend, Jennifer Jose.
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  Speaker 1: Hey, y'all back again for another wonderful show.
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  Speaker 3: I'm so excited today. This is going to be a
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  Speaker 3: great one.
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  Speaker 1: If you have experienced grief and loss in your life
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  Speaker 1: and it just through you for a loop, I know,
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  Speaker 1: you know, we were okay. I don't want to say okay,
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  Speaker 1: but you know, parents passing, you know, that's a natural
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  Speaker 1: kind of thing. They get older before we do. That's great.
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  Speaker 1: We know what's going to happen. We're all going to
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  Speaker 1: pass We know that. However, when a child passes away,
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  Speaker 1: like my kids have passed away, it is I call
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  Speaker 1: it the crappy club because it's just completely out of order,
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  Speaker 1: especially if it's a violent death or an it doesn't
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  Speaker 1: really matter. Actually, any type of loss of a child
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  Speaker 1: is absolutely devastating, as you can imagine. And if you're
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  Speaker 1: in that crappy club, my heart goes out to you,
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  Speaker 1: and I'm lad you're in my club because we're not
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  Speaker 1: alone and to be able to see people go before
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  Speaker 1: us and survive is extremely important.
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  Speaker 3: Now you all know me if you don't.
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  Speaker 1: Check out my other podcasts, because I live every day
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  Speaker 1: enjoy in My kids, Nick and Trey are here with
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  Speaker 1: me always. My businesses are Diamond Life because that's their burstone.
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  Speaker 1: And I know that I'm here for a reason. I
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  Speaker 1: know that I'm here to help empower women and help
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  Speaker 1: them live their.
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  Speaker 3: Very best life as possible.
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  Speaker 1: So with that said, it warms my heart when I
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  Speaker 1: meet someone who is just as special and has gone
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  Speaker 1: through as much crap as I have and can absolutely relate.
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  Speaker 3: And here's the trick, be en joy, right.
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  Speaker 1: We all go through grief, and we all can be
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  Speaker 1: great days and bad days and all of that. But
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  Speaker 1: to find joy in life and still live and live
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  Speaker 1: with with either purpose or kindness or happiness is a
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  Speaker 1: whole other level. It's a whole other level of getting
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  Speaker 1: through the grief crap. So I'm here to welcome a
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  Speaker 1: comrade in arms to me, another special friend that I've
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  Speaker 1: met several years ago, and she is doing amazing things.
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  Speaker 1: I have not spoken to her about her new stuff lately,
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  Speaker 1: so I'm very excited to bring on miss Dina.
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  Speaker 4: Betty, Hi, Jennifer, I'm so happy to be here.
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  Speaker 5: And yeah, crappy club.
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  Speaker 3: For sure, Crappy club for sure.
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  Speaker 1: And you know this talk, this show is the real
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  Speaker 1: talk show, and we have just a lot of fun
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  Speaker 1: here and we make it real and we not trying
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  Speaker 1: to impress anybody, not trying to do anything weird, just
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  Speaker 1: basically speak from your heart and your truth.
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  Speaker 5: That's why I love you.
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  Speaker 3: Yes, that's why I love you. Yeah.
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  Speaker 1: We totally totally meshed with that as soon as I
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  Speaker 1: met you. Right, yep, awesome, So tell me. Let's give
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  Speaker 1: everybody a little bit of history of you.
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  Speaker 3: And your life and where you're at now.
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  Speaker 4: Okay, so I'll give you the really short version. Mother
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  Speaker 4: of three, married, really good family life and in twenty fourteen,
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  Speaker 4: my daughter Jenna asked to go for a walk in
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  Speaker 4: our neighborhood and I used to tell my husband, you know,
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  Speaker 4: we have to let them spread their wings a little bit,
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  Speaker 4: or we have a forty year old living with us.
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  Speaker 4: One day, so she went out, and irony of my
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  Speaker 4: story is I also went out for a walk and
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  Speaker 4: I didn't see her, but we were texting, and this
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  Speaker 4: is in twenty fourteen, and as she said that she
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  Speaker 4: was going to be heading home pretty soon, and we
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  Speaker 4: had a four month puppy, so that's why I was out.
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  Speaker 5: And next thing, you know, Jennifer.
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  Speaker 4: I got a call on my cell phone from my
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  Speaker 4: husband and he was in complete.
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  Speaker 5: Not panic.
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  Speaker 4: It wasn't panic, it was horror. And he just told
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  Speaker 4: me to come to the train tracks. And my instant
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  Speaker 4: reaction was to run home. I was actually on my
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  Speaker 4: block going home. And to make a long story short,
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  Speaker 4: my daughter took the short way home that day with
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  Speaker 4: her friend. They sat down to carve on the railroad ties.
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  Speaker 4: She had put her cell phone down and when the
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  Speaker 4: train came, both the kids cleared the tracks. They were
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  Speaker 4: good to go, but Jenna remembered that she left her
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  Speaker 4: cell phone on the tracks. And so what we think
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  Speaker 4: is we think Jenna probably thought the width of the
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  Speaker 4: train was the width of the tracks, but that's not
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  Speaker 4: the case. And she got hit about five or six
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  Speaker 4: inches into her back, but because of the velocity of
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  Speaker 4: the train, it took her life and she was gone
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  Speaker 4: in a heartbeat. And as you know, your world turns
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  Speaker 4: upside down. And I won't get into that part because
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  Speaker 4: maybe that's for the other podcast. But what I will
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  Speaker 4: tell you is my business that I had for twelve
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  Speaker 4: and a half years as a real estate appraiser no
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  Speaker 4: longer felt like my calling. So I think that's a
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  Speaker 4: really important part of our message today with one another,
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  Speaker 4: is like, what do you do financially when you're not
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  Speaker 4: called to be in that place? And that place was
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  Speaker 4: helping feed your family. So about three months after Jenna
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  Speaker 4: passed away, I started the herstmile dot org website with
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  Speaker 4: a lot of help, a ton of help. And five
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  Speaker 4: years into doing that and letting my appraisal business go,
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  Speaker 4: we were living off of my husband's income. And Jenna
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  Speaker 4: was fourteen, and then I had an eleven year old
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  Speaker 4: and a nine year So the eleven year old and
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  Speaker 4: nine year old. Now we're getting close to looking at colleges,
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  Speaker 4: and you know, the expenses of college were very evident
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  Speaker 4: to me. They were very much in my consciousness, and
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  Speaker 4: there was no way that we were going to be
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  Speaker 4: able to manage the expense of college without me making
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  Speaker 4: an income. And it had been five years since I
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  Speaker 4: made a consistent income. So one of the things that
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  Speaker 4: I want to share with the audience today is, you know,
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  Speaker 4: I had let my my licensing go, as you know,
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  Speaker 4: my state licensing, I had let it go. I didn't
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  Speaker 4: renew it, and I put myself in this situation kind
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  Speaker 4: of like I guess consciously, you know, I knew I
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  Speaker 4: was going down that path to do something else, whatever
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  Speaker 4: that may be. And I really wanted to help people
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  Speaker 4: through the nonprofit. Anybody who runs a nonprofit knows that,
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  Speaker 4: you know, funding the cause is first and foremost, not
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  Speaker 4: funding your banking count. That is definitely very low on
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  Speaker 4: the pecking order. So I wasn't being paid well. I
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  Speaker 4: all of that building of the nonprofit was we had
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  Speaker 4: to do it organically, so that meant I had to
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  Speaker 4: learn how to build a website, I had to learn
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  Speaker 4: how to do email marketing, put on events, and all
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  Speaker 4: of those things that fall into the space of digital marketing.
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  Speaker 4: And I really really liked it, so in a way
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  Speaker 4: and then and then I'll stop talking, but in a
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  Speaker 4: way it led me to this other path.
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  Speaker 1: Oh my gosh. I want to back up a little bit,
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  Speaker 1: and I want to honor John. I want to honor
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  Speaker 1: that day. I want to honor what happened with such
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  Speaker 1: a fluke stupid accident. And I don't think you and
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  Speaker 1: I've ever discussed it, Like I really didn't know as
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  Speaker 1: I knew it was train tracks, but I really didn't
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  Speaker 1: know exactly what happened.
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  Speaker 4: Yeah, thank you for giving that space too. Yeah, it
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  Speaker 4: was just a terrible accident.
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  Speaker 3: Gosh.
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  Speaker 1: And then you're still a mom and have two other
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  Speaker 1: children to take care of and get through the unamanaging role.
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  Speaker 3: Like that's so difficult and to keep now is it?
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  Speaker 3: Now you're still married to Jenna's dad.
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  Speaker 5: Yeah, we're still married, happily married.
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  Speaker 1: And that is not easy, y'all, Like that is not
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  Speaker 1: easy to be able to.
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  Speaker 4: We were, Yeah, we were one of the like I
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  Speaker 4: think we got just as far as the lottery of
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  Speaker 4: how you deal with grief goes, we happened to be
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  Speaker 4: a couple that grieved similarly. And I'll tell you what
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  Speaker 4: I mean by that, but we were, like, I need
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  Speaker 4: to agree by doing That's why the herson, that's why
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  Speaker 4: her smile exists.
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  Speaker 1: You know.
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  Speaker 5: That was my way of.
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  Speaker 4: Getting through my grief was I needed to put action
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  Speaker 4: behind my behind it. And I know we're all different,
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  Speaker 4: but that was my way.
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  Speaker 3: Yeah, my way was not that.
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  Speaker 1: So you're absolutely right, we are all different and grief
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  Speaker 1: and grief is grief and everyone needs to be honored
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  Speaker 1: in the grief. So how did did your husband help
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  Speaker 1: with her smile or how did did he go to
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  Speaker 1: work like how did he manage his grief?
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  Speaker 5: Well, I think both of what you just said.
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  Speaker 4: So he was he was the consistent Joe in the
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  Speaker 4: in the relationship, he went to work, he really afforded
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  Speaker 4: me the opportunity and supported the whole process every step
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  Speaker 4: of the way. So that's what I mean, like we
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  Speaker 4: were very much in tandem.
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  Speaker 3: That's great. Now now we're still doing her smile right, ye.
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  Speaker 5: Still in our ninth year.
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  Speaker 4: And for example, we're helping a little we're helping a
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  Speaker 4: family whose son is fourteen months and has a brain tumor.
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  Speaker 5: So helping.
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  Speaker 4: And when I say helping, we help by funding needs.
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  Speaker 4: And we've moved into like that financial space of like,
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  Speaker 4: let's have you not worry about where you're lodging is
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  Speaker 4: going to be paid for if you have to go
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  Speaker 4: to Stamford or Ronald McDonald house hasn't gotten you into
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  Speaker 4: the program yet, you know, just let's take that stress
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  Speaker 4: off of you. And then we help families who have
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  Speaker 4: lost a dependent child with hardship costs or taking time
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  Speaker 4: off work and being able to not worry about the
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  Speaker 4: finance part of it things. And then families who have
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  Speaker 4: lost a parent with a dependent child, and we help
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  Speaker 4: them to fund. We've done some amazing things to offset
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  Speaker 4: the pressure of finances in a person's life who is grieving.
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  Speaker 5: And again we keep saying this to the audience, but
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  Speaker 5: it is, it is.
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  Speaker 4: Once you've been in this space, it's you know, it's
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  Speaker 4: a terrible space to navigate. But one of the things
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  Speaker 4: the least that you want to deal with is your
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  Speaker 4: finance finances.
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  Speaker 3: And you don't even care.
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  Speaker 1: You don't care, you don't even care, like you don't
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  Speaker 1: even care about anything that is even going on. My
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  Speaker 1: kids passed and my sister Kathleen and her husband Scott
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  Speaker 1: came and run my business for a year, and I
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  Speaker 1: could care less, like and we've had the business in
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  Speaker 1: the family for like thirty years at that time, and
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  Speaker 1: it's like we can't let and that was my only income,
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  Speaker 1: but I didn't care. And thank God that they were
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  Speaker 1: there to come and move into the house and literally
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  Speaker 1: just run it. And then I just came in to
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  Speaker 1: sign checks or whatever I needed to do just for me,
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  Speaker 1: and that was it, like there was just there's no way.
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  Speaker 1: So I applaud you for being able to be in
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  Speaker 1: action and be busy as well. And I know that
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  Speaker 1: there are people that do that, and it's very helpful
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  Speaker 1: to be able to, you know, dig into something. So
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  Speaker 1: I'm really glad you did that. And I looked at
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  Speaker 1: the website. It's hersmile dot org and it is a her.
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  Speaker 1: Jenna's smile is so bright, so I'm glad I noticed
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  Speaker 1: that you changed the website too, for in the last
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  Speaker 1: time that I looked at it, so uh. It and
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  Speaker 1: to be able to help people with the finances to
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  Speaker 1: because they do worry right when you if you have
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  Speaker 1: a sick child or something's happening and you want to
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  Speaker 1: be there for them, that's the worst.
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  Speaker 3: So for you to be able to do that.
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  Speaker 1: So now please check out her smile dot org and
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  Speaker 1: donate whatever you can five, ten, fifteen, twenty, twenty thousand,
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  Speaker 1: whatever you can. Diana definitely puts it to amazing work
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  Speaker 1: to help to help other people through this.
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  Speaker 4: And it goes to like if it's fun to need,
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  Speaker 4: it goes to that need. It doesn't go like we don't,
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  Speaker 4: like I said, I'm not being paid.
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  Speaker 5: For the work.
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  Speaker 1: So awesome, Okay, good, Well, Jenna's with us today. My
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  Speaker 1: kids Nick and Shurier with us today. They're up there
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  Speaker 1: having a blast doing whatever they want to do right,
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  Speaker 1: So they're probably laughing at us at this point, which
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  Speaker 1: is hilarious.
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  Speaker 3: Okay. So knowing that.
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  Speaker 1: And and being in business as a real estate what
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  Speaker 1: was what were you real estates.
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  Speaker 5: As a real estate appraiser?
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  Speaker 1: Because you learned a crap done during that whole time
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  Speaker 1: going into all those houses and understanding all of that, Like, I.
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  Speaker 3: Never knew that about you.
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  Speaker 1: Like, that's huge, that's a whole for Forte in itself.
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  Speaker 5: Yeah, it was.
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  Speaker 4: It was a really cool It was a cool opportunity,
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  Speaker 4: and it afforded me to be with the kids, work
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  Speaker 4: around their system, system, their schedule, and yeah, it was.
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  Speaker 4: It was really it was all that I would have
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  Speaker 4: wished to have raising the kids.
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  Speaker 1: So that's perfect so you can be there, that's that's
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  Speaker 1: I love that. That's I did the same thing with
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  Speaker 1: my schedule like that. I wanted a career that I
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  Speaker 1: can move my schedule around to be there for the kids.
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  Speaker 1: So women out there, if you listening, become a business owner.
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  Speaker 1: Pick out your business that you want to do so
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  Speaker 1: you can be there for the kids.
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  Speaker 3: Whoops, I think are you muted? Now go ahead and
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  Speaker 3: talk again.
• 15:13
  Speaker 5: I'm here, can hear you?
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  Speaker 3: I can't hear you.
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  Speaker 1: Look at the bottom of the screen, does it say mute?
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  Speaker 1: Is mine just muted? No, you can't hear her. I'm
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  Speaker 1: gonna just keep talking.
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  Speaker 5: Okay.
• 15:33
  Speaker 3: You can hear her and I can't.
• 15:34
  Speaker 1: Okay, So that means it's me sorry, y'all technical difficulties.
• 15:39
  Speaker 3: Let me see what my deal is. Can you guys
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  Speaker 3: hear me?
• 15:46
  Speaker 5: I can hear me.
• 15:47
  Speaker 3: Okay, So my speaker did it just freak out? Okay?
• 15:52
  Speaker 1: Let me go to settings, Go to audio, go to speaker. Okay,
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  Speaker 1: I don't know why that would have switched. Okay, go
• 16:00
  Speaker 1: ahead and talk.
• 16:03
  Speaker 3: Testing one to Okay, all of a sudden, it switched.
• 16:06
  Speaker 1: Gotta love our electronic atmosphere out here, all of our
• 16:09
  Speaker 1: EMF making.
• 16:10
  Speaker 3: That was the kids, Okay, that was probably Yeah.
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  Speaker 1: Oh my god, that's them messing with us. All right,
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  Speaker 1: your kids stop that. That's awesome.
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  Speaker 4: Yeah, okay, see that's definitely crazy. We were just talking
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  Speaker 4: about them, and then then you went on mute.
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  Speaker 1: Yeah, and I'm sitting right here like I did not
• 16:32
  Speaker 1: test anything, all right, Yeah, that's them.
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  Speaker 3: That's them. I'm telling you. There are doorbs. Okay. So okay,
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  Speaker 3: so you learned a lot in that industry.
• 16:45
  Speaker 1: I had a life catastrophic tragedy stopping your whole life,
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  Speaker 1: and then got into trying to make some sense of
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  Speaker 1: it all. I got my psychology degree and focused on
• 16:56
  Speaker 1: PTSD because I had PTSD. You dove into her smile
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  Speaker 1: and learning everything that you could about that. And I've
• 17:03
  Speaker 1: been to your dinner dance, which was amazing. So that
• 17:07
  Speaker 1: was really fun. And I missed your golf tournament, which
• 17:10
  Speaker 1: is a bummer because one day I would like to
• 17:11
  Speaker 1: do that.
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  Speaker 3: But I love all that.
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  Speaker 4: I do a shout out to the golf tournament because
• 17:16
  Speaker 4: it is so much fun and that this year we
• 17:18
  Speaker 4: sold out, which was super impressive because we didn't have
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  Speaker 4: it for two years with COVID, and so this is
• 17:25
  Speaker 4: we had it last year, we were able to have
• 17:27
  Speaker 4: it in this year, and so it's a.
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  Speaker 5: Lot of fun.
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  Speaker 1: That's great. That's really really good. Okay, so now what's
• 17:34
  Speaker 1: your new Now? I was on a show. You did
• 17:36
  Speaker 1: a show? Well yeah, okay, was that a podcast? Because
• 17:39
  Speaker 1: I know I was a guest on your show.
• 17:42
  Speaker 4: My very first guest actually, and I'm now retired from
• 17:45
  Speaker 4: the podcast. We did it for three years, I souldify
• 17:49
  Speaker 4: and it was really rewarding. We we kind of got
• 17:53
  Speaker 4: into that COVID time and you know it was time
• 17:57
  Speaker 4: to just say, like moving on to the next chapter.
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  Speaker 4: But it was about it was in the space of empowerment.
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  Speaker 4: It was empowerment in all different areas of our life, hell, mental, financial,
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  Speaker 4: having you on, so it was it was like a
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  Speaker 4: really holistic approach to wellness and it was fantastic and
• 18:18
  Speaker 4: we had amazing guests over the three years.
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  Speaker 3: That's so great and it's fun to do.
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  Speaker 1: And what I'm hearing your pattern is, which I want
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  Speaker 1: to applaud you, is pivoting and you're doing it with
• 18:31
  Speaker 1: a positive attitude and you're going to the next chapter.
• 18:34
  Speaker 3: It literally is a next chapter.
• 18:35
  Speaker 1: And sometimes when we dig our heels in, we don't
• 18:38
  Speaker 1: want to look at the next thing. But you're doing
• 18:41
  Speaker 1: that so wonderfully.
• 18:44
  Speaker 3: You know.
• 18:44
  Speaker 5: It's funny case.
• 18:45
  Speaker 4: You know, talking to my mom, I would say, my
• 18:48
  Speaker 4: mom is always thought I was a bit what's the
• 18:52
  Speaker 4: word I'm looking for, like really spontaneous, but I'm really not.
• 18:57
  Speaker 4: Like it's interesting that she sees it that way. But
• 18:59
  Speaker 4: I guess you know, more of a generation where you
• 19:02
  Speaker 4: stay in the same job for forty years and by
• 19:04
  Speaker 4: all means. I'm not judging that we now have this
• 19:07
  Speaker 4: different opportunity. I'm not saying it's better or worse.
• 19:10
  Speaker 5: It just is.
• 19:12
  Speaker 4: And yeah, so I've been able to I would never
• 19:16
  Speaker 4: say I've recreated myself.
• 19:17
  Speaker 5: I don't feel that way about myself at all.
• 19:20
  Speaker 4: I feel like I've evolved from or, like you said,
• 19:23
  Speaker 4: gone to the next chapter and taken those skills and
• 19:27
  Speaker 4: built upon them. But I also feel like I've done
• 19:30
  Speaker 4: it responsibly. I don't feel like I've been like really
• 19:34
  Speaker 4: flighty about it. One of the things that we did.
• 19:37
  Speaker 4: And I'm not plugging you on purpose, but just impressing
• 19:41
  Speaker 4: upon you that you have helped us have peace of
• 19:44
  Speaker 4: mind with our long term retirement or like kind of
• 19:50
  Speaker 4: pension ideas taking care like I just texted you the
• 19:54
  Speaker 4: other day about the critical care writer and making sure
• 19:59
  Speaker 4: that as I'm evolving and going into the next chapter
• 20:03
  Speaker 4: and I don't have a corporate pension or union pension
• 20:07
  Speaker 4: like my parents did, I don't have that. So being
• 20:10
  Speaker 4: really responsible about making sure I have that long term
• 20:16
  Speaker 4: you know game plan in place has given me the
• 20:20
  Speaker 4: kind of the wings to fly with within this kind
• 20:25
  Speaker 4: of like parameters, right, I mean, I know I know
• 20:29
  Speaker 4: I send X amount of dollars each month for savings,
• 20:32
  Speaker 4: right like I you kind of taught me to pay
• 20:35
  Speaker 4: myself first and then everything else I'm able to create.
• 20:40
  Speaker 4: It's given me a really great space to create within.
• 20:43
  Speaker 5: And you said.
• 20:44
  Speaker 4: Something earlier that really really resonates with me, And it's
• 20:47
  Speaker 4: this notion of joy, and so I really plug in
• 20:51
  Speaker 4: in a responsible way, not in like you know, traveling
• 20:55
  Speaker 4: brings me joy. So I'm just going to go travel
• 20:57
  Speaker 4: three hundred and sixty five days a year. Yeah that
• 21:00
  Speaker 4: might be like a goal, but it's not realistic right now.
• 21:05
  Speaker 4: So what I'm saying about joy is really being conscious
• 21:10
  Speaker 4: about what does bring me joy and letting that be
• 21:13
  Speaker 4: kind of that guiding light of where i want to
• 21:17
  Speaker 4: grow my business. And I've always been very entrepreneurial. I'm
• 21:22
  Speaker 4: going to say this, and I think you're gonna be like,
• 21:24
  Speaker 4: yet you agree, like being an entrepreneurial is a double
• 21:27
  Speaker 4: edged sword because feel like you're in jail when you
• 21:30
  Speaker 4: work for somebody else. And I and by the way,
• 21:33
  Speaker 4: I have done a little bit of that in the
• 21:36
  Speaker 4: last nine years and did not find it to bring
• 21:39
  Speaker 4: me joy just because of who I am. Nobody did
• 21:42
  Speaker 4: anything wrong. And then the other side of the point
• 21:47
  Speaker 4: is it's like you. The great part is the joy
• 21:50
  Speaker 4: is the creation, is the continuing to tap into that.
• 21:54
  Speaker 5: It's kind of hard to explain.
• 21:56
  Speaker 4: It's kind of in your like you know, your gut
• 21:58
  Speaker 4: that you feel that this it's part of who you are,
• 22:01
  Speaker 4: and I'm definitely that way. So being able to responsibly
• 22:06
  Speaker 4: move forward, I guess this is my point. You've helped
• 22:09
  Speaker 4: me tremendously in that space. So I very much thank you.
• 22:14
  Speaker 3: Oh my gosh, for sure. For sure. And you can
• 22:16
  Speaker 3: plug me time you want. Dina, I'm totally alone with that.
• 22:20
  Speaker 4: I want your audience to know that, like that was
• 22:23
  Speaker 4: not discussed between Jennifer and I.
• 22:25
  Speaker 5: It's very much.
• 22:28
  Speaker 1: So. I actually had a gift certificate at at a
• 22:32
  Speaker 1: fundraiser I think it was a police or school fundraiser
• 22:36
  Speaker 1: or something like that, and one of your friends won it,
• 22:41
  Speaker 1: and so I met with them and they said as
• 22:44
  Speaker 1: soon as they met me, they're like, oh my god,
• 22:46
  Speaker 1: you have got to me, Dina, like right away and
• 22:48
  Speaker 1: you were having your dinner dance. I was able to
• 22:51
  Speaker 1: I still have my her smile on turquoise sweatshirt.
• 22:54
  Speaker 5: Oh yeah, I.
• 22:57
  Speaker 3: Love it too.
• 22:57
  Speaker 1: I love it too, and so then we just started
• 22:59
  Speaker 1: our we were meant to be from from that moment, like,
• 23:02
  Speaker 1: it was so great that the way.
• 23:05
  Speaker 5: Both sides of the coin right and being able to
• 23:07
  Speaker 5: really through our grief.
• 23:10
  Speaker 4: And then the other part is that I needed you
• 23:13
  Speaker 4: too in my financial world as well.
• 23:17
  Speaker 3: Yeah, you guys are awesome. I love it good. Okay,
• 23:22
  Speaker 3: So now.
• 23:24
  Speaker 1: I'm just hearing such a This is such a great
• 23:27
  Speaker 1: conversation for women in business because it's it's showing that
• 23:31
  Speaker 1: we can go on, but not only just go on,
• 23:35
  Speaker 1: but go on and have fun and have joy. So
• 23:37
  Speaker 1: tell me about your daughters. Now where are they now?
• 23:40
  Speaker 1: They were nine and eleven then, so they've come a
• 23:42
  Speaker 1: long way.
• 23:44
  Speaker 4: Nor Yeah, So Julia is my middle daughter. She's at
• 23:46
  Speaker 4: Sonoma State. She's the captain and one of the captains
• 23:49
  Speaker 4: this year. And I'm in my opinion, thriving and doing
• 23:54
  Speaker 4: really well in school and playing soccer. I said, she's
• 23:59
  Speaker 4: did I say to play soccer, to play soccer for
• 24:02
  Speaker 4: a big soccer family. So she plays soccer for Sonoma
• 24:05
  Speaker 4: State and doing great. And then Gigi got kind of
• 24:08
  Speaker 4: trapped in the COVID space that affected her being able
• 24:13
  Speaker 4: to be seen and recruited on a more national level.
• 24:17
  Speaker 4: So just the way the cookies crumbled, we got this
• 24:21
  Speaker 4: opportunity and she is now in Rome for her second
• 24:24
  Speaker 4: year and she is playing competitive soccer, which is super cool,
• 24:28
  Speaker 4: which kind of goes back to like, yeah, I would
• 24:30
  Speaker 4: love to travel the world and be over there all
• 24:33
  Speaker 4: the time.
• 24:34
  Speaker 5: But yeah, so that's what she's doing. So they're doing.
• 24:36
  Speaker 3: Great, very exciting.
• 24:39
  Speaker 4: And you know, I will say something just on a
• 24:41
  Speaker 4: more on a deeper level with them, is we're really
• 24:44
  Speaker 4: conscious that the kind of that PTSD part that you
• 24:49
  Speaker 4: were speaking of earlier, Like for me, I'm highly aware
• 24:52
  Speaker 4: that it is not going to go away for any
• 24:54
  Speaker 4: of us. It says definitely something and this is something
• 24:57
  Speaker 4: I'd love to share with your audience.
• 24:59
  Speaker 5: Is know, everything changed for me.
• 25:02
  Speaker 4: When I want to say, it was like six months
• 25:05
  Speaker 4: to nine months after the after Jenna passed away, and
• 25:08
  Speaker 4: I was I did a lot of writing and I
• 25:12
  Speaker 4: was asking myself, this was like a conversation with myself
• 25:16
  Speaker 4: through my writing, is you know, when is this pain
• 25:18
  Speaker 4: gonna go away? And I don't know how it happened, Jennifer,
• 25:22
  Speaker 4: but it just came through me and and the answer
• 25:25
  Speaker 4: was very clear. And it was very loud that the
• 25:27
  Speaker 4: pain never goes away because the love never goes away.
• 25:30
  Speaker 5: Yeah, And I was like wow.
• 25:33
  Speaker 4: And and then and then the next realization, you know,
• 25:37
  Speaker 4: within a short period of time, was that, you know,
• 25:41
  Speaker 4: I was I could be joyful, I could still laugh,
• 25:44
  Speaker 4: you know, and I was like, Wow, I'm in this
• 25:45
  Speaker 4: space where the pain's never going to go away, but
• 25:49
  Speaker 4: yet I can feel joy. That was that was really
• 25:51
  Speaker 4: weird for me. I don't know if you relate to that,
• 25:54
  Speaker 4: but I was absolutely.
• 25:55
  Speaker 1: I felt so guilty when I smiled or giggled or something.
• 25:59
  Speaker 3: I absolutely one percent agree with you. Yeah.
• 26:03
  Speaker 5: And so I put kind of those two pieces.
• 26:06
  Speaker 4: I'm like, oh, so I could have these two emotional
• 26:09
  Speaker 4: states simultaneously.
• 26:12
  Speaker 5: And I was like, okay, well, if that's the.
• 26:14
  Speaker 4: Case, then I'm going to choose to be in a
• 26:17
  Speaker 4: space of joy as much as possible, knowing that, you know,
• 26:23
  Speaker 4: the pain doesn't go away. So back to the girls,
• 26:25
  Speaker 4: you know, they've had their bouts with their form of PTSD,
• 26:30
  Speaker 4: and my younger one when when the first couple of
• 26:33
  Speaker 4: years she had really bad OCD through her grief, and
• 26:36
  Speaker 4: it was just it manifested for each of them in
• 26:39
  Speaker 4: different ways, but we're gonna navigate that one day at
• 26:44
  Speaker 4: a time like we have for the last nine years.
• 26:47
  Speaker 5: So that's yeah. So thank you for asking me about them.
• 26:50
  Speaker 5: But overall they're doing really well.
• 26:52
  Speaker 1: That's wonderful, beautiful, beautiful girls. That's in Rome.
• 26:55
  Speaker 3: Oh my gosh, I'm so jealous of Gigi. Tell her,
• 26:58
  Speaker 3: I'm totally jealous. That's so great.
• 27:00
  Speaker 4: She says it's hotter that it's not there right now,
• 27:03
  Speaker 4: so it's like she's dying. She just got there a
• 27:06
  Speaker 4: week ago, you know, back from the summer, and she's like,
• 27:08
  Speaker 4: it's so hot.
• 27:10
  Speaker 3: Oh, we don't care. She's in Rome. Shut up, Gene,
• 27:15
  Speaker 3: you're in Rome. I love that.
• 27:19
  Speaker 1: I'm so glad that she's getting to experience that. That's
• 27:22
  Speaker 1: one of the best things we can do for our
• 27:23
  Speaker 1: kids is get them out of our little tiny town
• 27:26
  Speaker 1: or our little bubbles of what they think that the
• 27:28
  Speaker 1: world is actually all about. So she's going to be
• 27:30
  Speaker 1: a very well educated, well rounded woman growing up.
• 27:34
  Speaker 3: So I think that's try what that's all you can do,
• 27:38
  Speaker 3: exactly exactly. I love it. I love it. So let
• 27:42
  Speaker 3: me ask you that was a really good point.
• 27:46
  Speaker 1: I was actually just contacted from some friends of unfortunately
• 27:50
  Speaker 1: a woman whose husband took the lives of her two
• 27:53
  Speaker 1: daughters a couple of weeks ago, and so I'm hoping
• 27:56
  Speaker 1: to meet with her this weekend. I became a certified
• 27:59
  Speaker 1: grief count fifteen years later because I couldn't do it
• 28:02
  Speaker 1: before that, but fifteen years later to be able to
• 28:05
  Speaker 1: help give back to parents who've lost kids. No charging,
• 28:08
  Speaker 1: no nothing, kind of like you and horse her smile, right, like,
• 28:11
  Speaker 1: I just want want to be able to give back.
• 28:13
  Speaker 3: And so.
• 28:16
  Speaker 1: When you just said the joy at that time, when
• 28:19
  Speaker 1: you're going through any type of grief whatsoever or anything horrific,
• 28:25
  Speaker 1: and then you start to feel something like you fige
• 28:28
  Speaker 1: it for like just a minute or two, like not
• 28:30
  Speaker 1: even a long time, and then you start feeling weird
• 28:33
  Speaker 1: about that, and then you have to make a conscious choice,
• 28:36
  Speaker 1: is what you said, which I love because that's what
• 28:38
  Speaker 1: I did. I made a choice to live period and
• 28:42
  Speaker 1: then to live without bawling my head off every single day.
• 28:45
  Speaker 3: So and I know you did the same. So I
• 28:48
  Speaker 3: love that absolutely.
• 28:50
  Speaker 4: And if I may, I want to add onto that
• 28:53
  Speaker 4: as well, is that I in that space of writing
• 28:57
  Speaker 4: and really feel like I love Jenna so much and
• 29:01
  Speaker 4: just the pain was so much, but I thought, I
• 29:05
  Speaker 4: don't know it was it was a bit of like
• 29:07
  Speaker 4: connecting dots, and it took time in months, and I thought,
• 29:11
  Speaker 4: I don't want to live in a space of darkness
• 29:16
  Speaker 4: because that is not how I feel about my daughter.
• 29:19
  Speaker 4: And I'm going to live out the rest of my
• 29:21
  Speaker 4: days and darkness and not celebrate that love that I
• 29:26
  Speaker 4: have for her. And and as I was asking myself
• 29:29
  Speaker 4: these questions, I mean, for me, the answer became very
• 29:31
  Speaker 4: clear that like, oh, heck no, I am going to
• 29:34
  Speaker 4: go out there and live and I am going to
• 29:36
  Speaker 4: do it and her honor, and and you know, you're
• 29:39
  Speaker 4: like honor your life as well.
• 29:41
  Speaker 5: People. Yeah, people, you know say some really interesting things
• 29:46
  Speaker 5: when you're going through.
• 29:48
  Speaker 1: What's one of the one of the things that you
• 29:51
  Speaker 1: would recommend not to say?
• 29:55
  Speaker 4: Well, I mean, at top of the list is do
• 29:57
  Speaker 4: not say that you understand. The other thing that drove
• 30:01
  Speaker 4: me crazy was, well, a couple of things, like a
• 30:05
  Speaker 4: lot of people are like how are you? And then
• 30:07
  Speaker 4: I in my brain would be like, how the f
• 30:09
  Speaker 4: do you think I am? But they meant, well, I
• 30:12
  Speaker 4: just you know, my greatest advice advice is that just
• 30:15
  Speaker 4: it's nice to say.
• 30:16
  Speaker 5: That you have no words, but that you're there for
• 30:18
  Speaker 5: the person. And that's kind of like and you know,
• 30:24
  Speaker 5: not so sticky.
• 30:26
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I love that.
• 30:28
  Speaker 5: I know that. It's no, they're just trying to be nice.
• 30:31
  Speaker 4: But the other thing is people would say like, well,
• 30:33
  Speaker 4: if anybody deserves to feel terrible, it's you, or like
• 30:38
  Speaker 4: they almost put me at the top of this pecking
• 30:41
  Speaker 4: order of grief and lost, like well, you lost a daughter.
• 30:44
  Speaker 4: So if anybody is gonna you know, devastated and in
• 30:47
  Speaker 4: a place of darkness, it's you. And I was like wow, like,
• 30:51
  Speaker 4: well my life, Like what do you I like, I honor.
• 30:55
  Speaker 4: I honor this thing that we've been given called life.
• 30:58
  Speaker 4: It's not easy, but it surely is purposeful. So if
• 31:03
  Speaker 4: it's purposeful, then I'd like to have some say about that.
• 31:07
  Speaker 3: Yes, I love that.
• 31:08
  Speaker 1: And back in the day I started, I even bought
• 31:13
  Speaker 1: the U r L Grief is grief because that's what
• 31:15
  Speaker 1: would happen. I would go to a grief group or
• 31:17
  Speaker 1: support group or anything at all, and they put me
• 31:19
  Speaker 1: on that place and it's like.
• 31:21
  Speaker 3: Well, every grief is grief.
• 31:24
  Speaker 1: Yes, it's very different losing a child than a dog
• 31:28
  Speaker 1: or a parent or a divorce However, if you've had
• 31:32
  Speaker 1: any traumatic anything in any of that, that's like it.
• 31:37
  Speaker 1: Grief is grief like it. Everyone is different, and you
• 31:39
  Speaker 1: can't imagine. You can't put yourself in that of the
• 31:42
  Speaker 1: person's shoes because you just can't do that. And so
• 31:48
  Speaker 1: just to honor and we do not do well with
• 31:49
  Speaker 1: the grief, the whole grief situation in this country.
• 31:53
  Speaker 3: We do not honor it.
• 31:54
  Speaker 1: We don't understand it, we're afraid of it. And I
• 31:59
  Speaker 1: also have another friend who lost a brother and is
• 32:05
  Speaker 1: too afraid to grieve, So she just has a underlining
• 32:10
  Speaker 1: sadness continuous. Now she's positive person, but there's like an
• 32:14
  Speaker 1: underlining sadness in her body at all times. And I
• 32:16
  Speaker 1: feel so bad because she's afraid to go to those
• 32:21
  Speaker 1: deep feelings of grief. So good job Dina for doing
• 32:26
  Speaker 1: that and holding your children and your husband while they
• 32:29
  Speaker 1: did it as well.
• 32:30
  Speaker 4: All right to your friend, I mean the body. I
• 32:33
  Speaker 4: don't know if the audience has heard of the book
• 32:36
  Speaker 4: The Body Keeps the Score. It's one of my favorite
• 32:38
  Speaker 4: books about trauma and grief. Grief is definitely a traumatic
• 32:44
  Speaker 4: experience that we go through for many.
• 32:47
  Speaker 5: Of us, and so The Body Keeps the score.
• 32:50
  Speaker 4: So it's like, you know, my motto is like if
• 32:52
  Speaker 4: you've got to cry, cry, I mean, it's like, let
• 32:54
  Speaker 4: it move through you.
• 32:55
  Speaker 5: Don't stay.
• 32:56
  Speaker 4: You don't need to stay in that state, but you
• 32:58
  Speaker 4: need to honor that emotion and then guess what. You
• 33:01
  Speaker 4: honor it in the moment, and you've honored it and
• 33:04
  Speaker 4: it's not stuffed inside of you, and it moves through
• 33:09
  Speaker 4: you and it's not a right or wrong, It just
• 33:13
  Speaker 4: is and you just allow yourself to feel. And the
• 33:16
  Speaker 4: more you're in tune with feeling, the more it's it's
• 33:21
  Speaker 4: kind of strange, but it becomes more manageable, manage.
• 33:27
  Speaker 1: Absolutely manageable, and like an ocean wave, just let it,
• 33:31
  Speaker 1: let it run past it. When you fight it and
• 33:34
  Speaker 1: stuff it, that's when you get into trouble. So if
• 33:36
  Speaker 1: you can just let it go, I know a lot
• 33:38
  Speaker 1: of people are afraid to do that, So grab a coach,
• 33:43
  Speaker 1: give us a call. You have all our information here, Well,
• 33:47
  Speaker 1: well we'll help you out so you don't have to
• 33:49
  Speaker 1: do it by yourself.
• 33:52
  Speaker 3: Yes, for sure. Okay, another question, how.
• 34:02
  Speaker 1: I can just I had my thirty year anniversary of
• 34:05
  Speaker 1: my kids passing on July eleventh, and Dina it took
• 34:09
  Speaker 1: me out, Like I was so shocked that it took
• 34:13
  Speaker 1: me out, but I literally it took me out for
• 34:16
  Speaker 1: like a month. I was sad for a month like
• 34:18
  Speaker 1: that has not happened in a very long time. And
• 34:21
  Speaker 1: I have birthdays in April, you know, they're passing in July,
• 34:27
  Speaker 1: and I speak about them all the time now right,
• 34:29
  Speaker 1: They're part of my daily repertoire. And for some reason,
• 34:35
  Speaker 1: thirty years just took me out, just threw me for
• 34:38
  Speaker 1: a loop. So gave myself grace and told everybody what
• 34:41
  Speaker 1: was happening because I couldn't remember anything. I would forget things,
• 34:45
  Speaker 1: you know, just you know that you're back at that
• 34:47
  Speaker 1: stage again.
• 34:48
  Speaker 3: And I asked my.
• 34:50
  Speaker 1: Girlfriends to join me, and we had like a little
• 34:55
  Speaker 1: girl's weekend because I don't remember a lot of the
• 35:00
  Speaker 1: first year, or especially the first you know, month or so,
• 35:04
  Speaker 1: and so they were filling me in on things that
• 35:06
  Speaker 1: I was like, seriously, I had no idea. I had
• 35:09
  Speaker 1: created a whole different story in my head. And this
• 35:12
  Speaker 1: is thirty years later, so and I've gone through. I
• 35:16
  Speaker 1: went to court. I was in court for five years
• 35:18
  Speaker 1: on the autopsies. I've done the all the court stuff,
• 35:21
  Speaker 1: all the crap and I'm kind of not there in
• 35:23
  Speaker 1: my head now but it was at the time. But
• 35:26
  Speaker 1: for some reason, this thirty year anniversary just had me
• 35:30
  Speaker 1: go back to it, all of it and they and
• 35:33
  Speaker 1: I just absolutely feel them with.
• 35:36
  Speaker 3: Like I can literally almost picture SHERI right now. She's twenty.
• 35:39
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't know why she's twenty or thirty whatever
• 35:41
  Speaker 1: she is, but she's not five anymore.
• 35:43
  Speaker 3: And they're hilarious and they're with me all the time.
• 35:46
  Speaker 1: So and I just had to allow myself to feel
• 35:49
  Speaker 1: all of that to be able to get on this
• 35:51
  Speaker 1: side of it. So tell me, did anniversaries do anything
• 35:55
  Speaker 1: or any special times that kind of caught you off guard?
• 35:59
  Speaker 5: Yeah?
• 35:59
  Speaker 4: I mean I now they're all kind of like bunched
• 36:02
  Speaker 4: in together. But for me, I can relate to what
• 36:05
  Speaker 4: you're saying about, like milestones, and oftentimes for me, it
• 36:10
  Speaker 4: comes up in our family experiences. For example, when Julia
• 36:16
  Speaker 4: went off to college and she didn't go her first
• 36:19
  Speaker 4: year was a COVID year, so really technically it was
• 36:21
  Speaker 4: her sophomore year that she was going away from the house,
• 36:25
  Speaker 4: and it was like it hit me like a not
• 36:28
  Speaker 4: because she was leaving and she wasn't going far right,
• 36:31
  Speaker 4: But for me, I was like, wow, what would I
• 36:34
  Speaker 4: would have already experienced all of this with Jenna?
• 36:37
  Speaker 5: Where would Jenna have been?
• 36:38
  Speaker 4: And I missed out on being able to live that
• 36:44
  Speaker 4: part of our lives together. And don't get me wrong,
• 36:47
  Speaker 4: I see her as a fourteen year gift and you know,
• 36:50
  Speaker 4: eternally in my heart, but that physical presence, I was like,
• 36:55
  Speaker 4: we missed.
• 36:56
  Speaker 5: Out on so much together. So my mind.
• 37:00
  Speaker 1: And hit me like that, So there's another grief. Now
• 37:03
  Speaker 1: you're grieving not having Jena go to college. And yeah,
• 37:06
  Speaker 1: absolutely like it.
• 37:08
  Speaker 3: It just rolls.
• 37:09
  Speaker 1: But if we if we just let it roll, it
• 37:12
  Speaker 1: will roll. It will not stay.
• 37:14
  Speaker 5: Yeah. Yeah, I.
• 37:18
  Speaker 4: Like you have come across many people who have reached out.
• 37:23
  Speaker 4: It's become hard for me too sometimes because well for
• 37:28
  Speaker 4: many reasons, just knowing the journey is hard. Also it's
• 37:34
  Speaker 4: the energy thing for me too, is that if I
• 37:37
  Speaker 4: if I have somebody who is like really stubborn and
• 37:40
  Speaker 4: wants to stay in darkness, that you know.
• 37:43
  Speaker 5: That's that's challenging for me. I very challenge with my
• 37:47
  Speaker 5: soul to you know, walk that journey.
• 37:50
  Speaker 4: I want to walk that journey, but it brings up
• 37:52
  Speaker 4: a lot of trauma for me too, So I'm not
• 37:55
  Speaker 4: I'm not that great yet.
• 37:56
  Speaker 5: I'm not as great as that. You know, what you
• 37:59
  Speaker 5: do is amazing.
• 37:59
  Speaker 3: It took me fifteen years, Zina.
• 38:02
  Speaker 1: Don't worry here like it took me a long time
• 38:04
  Speaker 1: to even think that I would be able to do that.
• 38:06
  Speaker 1: And I will say I agree with you, because my
• 38:11
  Speaker 1: whole life is set up to be here in a
• 38:17
  Speaker 1: higher vibration and to be enjoy I do not watch
• 38:19
  Speaker 1: the news.
• 38:21
  Speaker 3: I don't know what's happening.
• 38:22
  Speaker 1: I literally was in Charlotte all weekend and we had
• 38:24
  Speaker 1: a hurricane in LA and we had a five point
• 38:28
  Speaker 1: something earthquake. I didn't want to hear anything about it.
• 38:31
  Speaker 1: I called my cat senter the kidd's fine, I'm all good, great,
• 38:35
  Speaker 1: let me know if you need anything, and I'm back
• 38:37
  Speaker 1: to out of that. Like I don't dwell, I purposely
• 38:40
  Speaker 1: consciously meditate in the morning. We do our healings at
• 38:44
  Speaker 1: eight o'clock. Like I set my entire mind. I eat
• 38:47
  Speaker 1: the right thing, I get my good sleep, I take
• 38:50
  Speaker 1: all my supplements.
• 38:51
  Speaker 3: I try. Now am I head?
• 38:53
  Speaker 1: I was a perfect heck no, heck no, right, But
• 38:56
  Speaker 1: it is my priority to keep my soul, my vibration,
• 39:02
  Speaker 1: my body, my joy up at all times and so
• 39:07
  Speaker 1: that I can be there for my clients and I
• 39:09
  Speaker 1: can be there for myself and my kids and make
• 39:12
  Speaker 1: me feel good.
• 39:14
  Speaker 3: And I've I just.
• 39:15
  Speaker 1: Got back from vacation. Ish we put on a party.
• 39:19
  Speaker 1: My daughter's engaged journeys Engaged.
• 39:22
  Speaker 5: Amazing.
• 39:24
  Speaker 3: Yeah, that's very exciting.
• 39:25
  Speaker 1: Her and Lucas. I'm so excited. Just an amazing event.
• 39:28
  Speaker 1: And I'm still tired, so that doesn't meand that I'm
• 39:31
  Speaker 1: not going to go sit.
• 39:32
  Speaker 3: My hass on the capcha watch TV tonight and totally relax.
• 39:36
  Speaker 3: I'm really excited to do that.
• 39:38
  Speaker 1: And if I, like you said, come across someone who's
• 39:41
  Speaker 1: stuck in the victim role, I mean I speak in
• 39:44
  Speaker 1: twelve steps because CODA and you know, parents of addicts
• 39:47
  Speaker 1: and all that stuff. So I've done and and alan
• 39:49
  Speaker 1: on and all that great stuff. So I like twelve steps.
• 39:52
  Speaker 1: Twelve steps are amazing. They saved my life.
• 39:53
  Speaker 3: I love it.
• 39:54
  Speaker 1: And so we speak, Okay, do you want to stay
• 39:56
  Speaker 1: in victim or not? Like your choice to get out
• 40:00
  Speaker 1: that role? And so I have trouble with people stuck
• 40:04
  Speaker 1: in victim as well. I can't help there's no way
• 40:08
  Speaker 1: we can. They have to make the choice to want
• 40:09
  Speaker 1: to get better. If they make the choice to want
• 40:12
  Speaker 1: to get better, I'm hands down.
• 40:14
  Speaker 3: Ready for you.
• 40:14
  Speaker 1: But if you want to just continue to regurgitate the crap,
• 40:19
  Speaker 1: I can't go there with you because I can't keep
• 40:21
  Speaker 1: my energy up.
• 40:22
  Speaker 3: Does that make sense?
• 40:23
  Speaker 4: Oh totally, And I am, yeah, very validating because I
• 40:28
  Speaker 4: do beat myself up about that a bit, like I
• 40:30
  Speaker 4: want to be able to be more or impact more,
• 40:36
  Speaker 4: you know, And it's all rooted in like the spirit
• 40:39
  Speaker 4: of that comment is like I want to be able
• 40:41
  Speaker 4: to do that in Jenna's honor, is to be able
• 40:44
  Speaker 4: to have that impact in the world. Yeah, so that's
• 40:47
  Speaker 4: why I beat myself up about But it's really you
• 40:51
  Speaker 4: said it beautifully. It's just like you do when you
• 40:53
  Speaker 4: go through something like this and you are being very
• 40:56
  Speaker 4: purposeful in your life and to keep your energy up
• 40:59
  Speaker 4: and your righteousness aware. It takes it takes a bit
• 41:04
  Speaker 4: of energy to you know, I'm still waiting for the data,
• 41:09
  Speaker 4: you know, waves to like kick in and just be
• 41:11
  Speaker 4: like endless amount of energy. I'm not there either, so
• 41:16
  Speaker 4: but yeah, it anyway, you said it beautifully.
• 41:21
  Speaker 1: It's perfect. I'm so glad you brought that up. I'm
• 41:22
  Speaker 1: so glad you brought that up. So now tell me.
• 41:25
  Speaker 1: We have just a few however, minims left, six seven
• 41:28
  Speaker 1: minutes left, tell me about your new stuff. You first
• 41:32
  Speaker 1: of all the words I like digital marketing. I'm like, what, okay, great,
• 41:38
  Speaker 1: So tell me what that means. Tell me what you're
• 41:40
  Speaker 1: doing now and.
• 41:43
  Speaker 3: Let's chat.
• 41:44
  Speaker 5: Yeah, let's chat.
• 41:46
  Speaker 4: So I mentioned it a little bit, but because I
• 41:49
  Speaker 4: learned so much through this and not evergreen but doing
• 41:55
  Speaker 4: it myself raganically. Yeah, thank you oric. Having to do
• 42:00
  Speaker 4: all of these things myself to stay on a budget,
• 42:04
  Speaker 4: it really brought me down that path. And I'll tell
• 42:07
  Speaker 4: you what that path is. But like being able to
• 42:11
  Speaker 4: work on the health of a website, being able to
• 42:13
  Speaker 4: write blogs, being able to SEO optimize content, and that's
• 42:17
  Speaker 4: just SEO. I'm sure you know what that is. Being
• 42:21
  Speaker 4: able to do the you know, mailchim for sending out newsletters,
• 42:25
  Speaker 4: like I said, they have all these things is digital marketing, right,
• 42:29
  Speaker 4: how we market through our computers.
• 42:32
  Speaker 5: And I'm very like creative.
• 42:36
  Speaker 4: I like to be creative, so that gives me an
• 42:39
  Speaker 4: outlet to create banners and thumbnails and advertising and creativity
• 42:47
  Speaker 4: and my writing, so being that's a great outlet for
• 42:51
  Speaker 4: me as a person, and I feel very thankful. I
• 42:55
  Speaker 4: feel like Jenna has shown me the way. You know,
• 42:58
  Speaker 4: one step at a time, and if you just tap
• 43:02
  Speaker 4: into that, we are led. It might not feel that
• 43:07
  Speaker 4: way often, but we are definitely led from a higher space,
• 43:12
  Speaker 4: no matter what you want to call that space. But
• 43:18
  Speaker 4: like energy finds like energy. So when you keep that
• 43:21
  Speaker 4: vibration up and you keep your intention up, and I've
• 43:24
  Speaker 4: always kept the intention at the top of my to
• 43:27
  Speaker 4: do list, and then how it all pans out is
• 43:30
  Speaker 4: how it pans out. So very high on the list
• 43:34
  Speaker 4: is creativity, impacting people in a positive way, being a
• 43:39
  Speaker 4: person of service, being able to have freedom in my
• 43:44
  Speaker 4: workplace in order to serve in the capacity of her smile.
• 43:49
  Speaker 4: So those were like really high level intentions, but I
• 43:52
  Speaker 4: didn't get granular on the how. I let the universe
• 43:56
  Speaker 4: figure out the how for me, and it's kind of
• 43:59
  Speaker 4: plugged in along the way, this digital marketing space. I
• 44:03
  Speaker 4: also use this space to make money, like I said,
• 44:07
  Speaker 4: so it wasn't only that I liked it, but I
• 44:09
  Speaker 4: tapped into it to make money for our family. I
• 44:13
  Speaker 4: got into affiliate marketing, which is basically like affiliate marketing,
• 44:18
  Speaker 4: and for those who don't know about it, it's like
• 44:21
  Speaker 4: are like parents, generation's whostsaler. Right, So if I wanted
• 44:26
  Speaker 4: to promote Jennifer in any capacity and I got you
• 44:32
  Speaker 4: X amount of leads that turned into customer, maybe Jennifer
• 44:35
  Speaker 4: would pay me X amount of dollars or you know,
• 44:39
  Speaker 4: we see this all across the internet. So I started
• 44:42
  Speaker 4: doing that and I was able to do that very
• 44:46
  Speaker 4: passively from my home. And then I got into SEO marketing,
• 44:50
  Speaker 4: YouTube advertising. I mentor now in the YouTube space to
• 44:54
  Speaker 4: teach people how to advertise their business. And and now
• 45:00
  Speaker 4: I've started an agency for SEO and email marketing, and
• 45:07
  Speaker 4: I look at their KPIs for their website and their
• 45:10
  Speaker 4: website health and it's just evolved. And it's a skill
• 45:14
  Speaker 4: that No, I didn't go to college. I actually have
• 45:17
  Speaker 4: a physiology degree. It didn't go to college to learn
• 45:21
  Speaker 4: how to do any of this. But it just goes
• 45:23
  Speaker 4: to show that you can recreate yourself in a thoughtful way.
• 45:30
  Speaker 4: But I never said I wanted to recreate myself. But
• 45:33
  Speaker 4: going full circle with our conversation, very much like you,
• 45:37
  Speaker 4: I just followed the joy and the doors that were opening.
• 45:42
  Speaker 4: I feel in doors swing open, that means something in
• 45:45
  Speaker 4: my life, and that means that it's meant to be.
• 45:49
  Speaker 4: And I've had some like pinnacle times in my life
• 45:52
  Speaker 4: when the doors have swung open. I'm like, Okay, well
• 45:55
  Speaker 4: it's like a boom, right, this is where you should
• 45:58
  Speaker 4: be going. So that's what I been doing. So for
• 46:01
  Speaker 4: anybody who is in need of any of those services,
• 46:05
  Speaker 4: definitely reach out to me. If I can't do what
• 46:08
  Speaker 4: I can, help find somebody who can. But yeah, we'll
• 46:12
  Speaker 4: have been together. I have fun with my clients.
• 46:15
  Speaker 3: That's awesome. So how can they reach you? What's the
• 46:18
  Speaker 3: best way? Do you have an email or something?
• 46:21
  Speaker 5: I do?
• 46:21
  Speaker 4: It's the it's the easiest email to remember. It's Dina
• 46:25
  Speaker 4: at Dina betty dot com. And Dina is d e
• 46:28
  Speaker 4: A for anybody who's looking at the screen, there it is, and.
• 46:32
  Speaker 3: Then Dina b E d T t I dot com. Right, okay, awesome.
• 46:38
  Speaker 1: So then then they can reach you through her smile
• 46:40
  Speaker 1: website as well, because we've been scrolling that too.
• 46:43
  Speaker 4: Oh perfect, and her smile is Dina at her smile
• 46:47
  Speaker 4: dot org. So that's pretty straightforward as well.
• 46:51
  Speaker 3: That's so great, I'm excited.
• 46:53
  Speaker 1: Well, I definitely want to talk to you more about
• 46:54
  Speaker 1: that space because that's not my forte at all and
• 46:59
  Speaker 1: I don't enjoy it. So we definitely need to talk
• 47:02
  Speaker 1: a little bit more about that. So I just want
• 47:05
  Speaker 1: to I mean, I could just cry right now because
• 47:08
  Speaker 1: I'm so thankful I met you. I am so thankful
• 47:12
  Speaker 1: that I met you to have somebody else in my
• 47:14
  Speaker 1: crappy club with me, and to see you and your
• 47:18
  Speaker 1: family survive this and be amazing, bright shining lights in
• 47:23
  Speaker 1: this world.
• 47:25
  Speaker 3: I'm just so so happy. Thank you.
• 47:28
  Speaker 4: Likewise, really, I know in my heart our meeting each
• 47:33
  Speaker 4: other was a thousand percent men to be.
• 47:36
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I agree, I agree, and I will always say
• 47:39
  Speaker 1: the F word is my favorite favorite word. The F
• 47:42
  Speaker 1: word is you got to follow your feelings, and that's
• 47:45
  Speaker 1: what you've been doing all the way. And when you
• 47:47
  Speaker 1: feel stressed about money, reach out and get some help.
• 47:49
  Speaker 1: When you feel stressed about grief, reach out and get
• 47:52
  Speaker 1: some help, because we don't have to be that way,
• 47:55
  Speaker 1: but to follow our feelings and our intention first.
• 47:57
  Speaker 3: So you just fell right into all of my stuff.
• 48:00
  Speaker 1: So I want you to be able to say I
• 48:01
  Speaker 1: rock my finances too, which I know you already do
• 48:03
  Speaker 1: because you know your advisor.
• 48:05
  Speaker 3: Is amazing.
• 48:09
  Speaker 4: That and you know we're we got to talk to
• 48:11
  Speaker 4: just about Yeah, maybe there's more that we can do.
• 48:14
  Speaker 4: I mean now that we've got some foundational things taking
• 48:18
  Speaker 4: care of, like I shared with the audience about the
• 48:20
  Speaker 4: long term game. Yeah, so we'll connect.
• 48:24
  Speaker 3: I love it. I love it.
• 48:25
  Speaker 1: Thank you so much, Dina, Thank you so much for
• 48:27
  Speaker 1: being I really appreciate it. All right, Jenna, Nick and Shuri,
• 48:31
  Speaker 1: go play someplace else, go have fun.
• 48:33
  Speaker 3: Don't make my speaker out and have a blast. Awesome.
• 48:38
  Speaker 3: Thank you so much.
• 48:40
  Speaker 5: All right, shout now bye.
• 48:43
  Speaker 2: We appreciate you joining us today, and don't forget to
• 48:46
  Speaker 2: subscribe to the rock my Finances YouTube channel for more
• 48:50
  Speaker 2: engagement and bonus content. Tell me what is your money story?
• 48:54
  Speaker 2: Let's find out with Jennifer four pm Eastern one pm
• 48:58
  Speaker 2: Pacific every Thursday right here on K four HD Radio
• 49:02
  Speaker 2: and Talk for TV. It's not about the zeros, It's
• 49:05
  Speaker 2: about the F word, feelings, feelings. Jennifer can't wait to
• 49:10
  Speaker 2: explore with you next week. Until then, let's all say
• 49:14
  Speaker 2: I rock my Finances