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Hour 1 - A Tiger in Your Tank · The Ben Maller Show

0:00
Speaker 1: Great googly moogly.
0:01
Speaker 2: It's our number one, hour one, and the Ben Maller Show.
0:08
Speaker 2: We stayed up all night to provide you four hours
0:12
Speaker 2: of fresh audio content we call the Ben Maller Show.
0:16
Speaker 1: And thank you.
0:18
Speaker 2: I know many of you who listen to this podcast
0:20
Speaker 2: are graduates of the overnight shift, and you've gone on
0:23
Speaker 2: to the dreaded day shift, and I do appreciate that.
0:26
Speaker 1: I want to remind you we have the fifth hour.
0:28
Speaker 1: The fifth hour with, yeah, with me, Ben Maller. And
0:33
Speaker 1: that'll be coming up later today.
0:35
Speaker 2: It's actually probably available by now when you start listening
0:37
Speaker 2: to this podcast. And on this Friday edition, we have
0:40
Speaker 2: the post-game show from the big Maller meet and greet
0:44
Speaker 2: in Lost Wages, Nevada. All the good, the bad, and
0:48
Speaker 2: the ugly as we had a rollicking time in Sin City.
0:52
Speaker 2: Also a little movie magic episode. involving one of the
0:55
Speaker 2: big stories of the week. So that'll be coming up
0:57
Speaker 2: for you on today's episode of the Fifth Hour. Now
1:00
Speaker 2: here in hour number one, we talk about the big story.
1:05
Speaker 2: It's an ongoing story. At the time we recorded the
1:08
Speaker 2: Ben Maller Show, it was a win in round one
1:12
Speaker 2: for LSU. So how big a deal is Lane Kiffin's
1:15
Speaker 2: LSU courtroom victory, as they will play Clemson on Saturday?
1:20
Speaker 2: And what comes next in this ongoing saga between LSU's
1:24
Speaker 2: Lane Kiffin and.
1:25
Speaker 1: The SEC and the NCAA? We'll talk about that.
1:28
Speaker 2: George's Kirby Smart says the NFL people tell him the
1:33
Speaker 2: SEC remains ahead of the Big Ten. How does that
1:37
Speaker 2: reshape basketball? the situation, the battle between those two conferences.
1:42
Speaker 2: We'll talk about all that and more. You get your
1:44
Speaker 2: second bite of the apple on this fourth day of
1:46
Speaker 2: September on this Friday.
1:48
Speaker 1: Here it is, our number one. A tiger in your tank.
1:59
Speaker 2: Welcome in the beginning. of another night of the Ben
2:07
Speaker 2: Maller Show.
2:08
Speaker 1: We are in the air everywhere. Literally, it's amazing.
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2:33
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2:51
Speaker 2: ocean guaranteed human from the world-famous Fox Sports Radio Studios.
2:57
Speaker 1: Oh, you gotta get in that. A lot of that.
3:01
Speaker 1: A lot of that. Mallor prop guy and Ferg dog
3:03
Speaker 1: and Alf, they're all standing by. It's like a barbershop quartet.
3:09
Speaker 1: And they're saying, hey, Mallor.
3:11
Speaker 2: We really need some of the good stuff. And I said, well,
3:13
Speaker 2: you know, do you want?
3:14
Speaker 3: OK, fine.
3:16
Speaker 2: Why not? What the hell? So we will have later
3:20
Speaker 2: on just kind of set things up for you. It's
3:21
Speaker 2: a red eye flight. We fly the red eye. We're
3:24
Speaker 2: not allowed to be on the radio when the sun
3:26
Speaker 2: is up, unless you're listening in some foreign land somewhere
3:28
Speaker 2: where the sun is up.
3:29
Speaker 1: And that's like a cheat code.
3:30
Speaker 2: But in the United States, in North America, our friends
3:34
Speaker 2: in Canada, our brothers and sisters in Mexico who, listen, we're.
3:38
Speaker 1: Only allowed to be on under the cover of darkness.
3:40
Speaker 1: We have a rule. It's in my contract to only
3:42
Speaker 1: be on when the sun is down. That's it. That's all.
3:46
Speaker 1: So later on this hour, we'll have the Who Am
3:48
Speaker 1: I game. We'll have that for you.
3:50
Speaker 2: Also, in hour two, Mallard to the third degree, we'll
3:54
Speaker 2: have the Insta Trivia Game.
3:57
Speaker 1: In hour two. You'll be long gone by hour three,
3:59
Speaker 1: but if you stick around for hour three, we'll have
4:02
Speaker 1: the Mallor Riddle of the Day. The Comedy Club will
4:05
Speaker 1: open up. Big Ben's Lame Jokes of the Week.
4:07
Speaker 2: You think your fellow nocturnal men, women, I'd say children,
4:12
Speaker 2: but we don't get kid calls anymore. So just like
4:14
Speaker 2: men and women can't write jokes. Oh no, they're very funny.
4:17
Speaker 2: They're very funny. And then later on, way, way past
4:20
Speaker 2: your bedtime there, the Coop Scoop on Entertainment will take
4:24
Speaker 2: place in hour four. We'll also have Sports Jeopardy as
4:28
Speaker 2: well is in my deal here. I must begin with
4:32
Speaker 2: a Maller monologue. It would be called something else, but
4:34
Speaker 2: my name is Maller. So our lead this hour from
4:38
Speaker 2: below the Mason-Dixon line, Southern Fried Fury.
4:44
Speaker 1: Man, is this a great story. So a Baton Rouge judge.
4:49
Speaker 2: Who may or may not have been wearing LSU boxer
4:51
Speaker 2: shorts ruled against the NCAA, and that clears a pathway.
4:58
Speaker 1: The A-gap is now.
4:59
Speaker 2: Open for former NFL players Daquan Wright and Zavion Harris
5:06
Speaker 2: and others to return to college. So if you didn't
5:11
Speaker 2: see this, this has been bubbling up throughout the nighttime hours,
5:15
Speaker 2: and it will continue to percolate through Friday because there'll
5:19
Speaker 2: be more legal wrangling taking place as last-minute injunctions are
5:23
Speaker 2: requested and whatnot. But for now, we'll focus on what
5:27
Speaker 2: has happened. So it's good.
5:31
Speaker 1: These guys, Daquan Wright and Xavier Harris, who went off
5:34
Speaker 1: to the NFL and didn't make it in the NFL,
5:37
Speaker 1: can now reunite, and it feels so good.
5:41
Speaker 2: With the troublemaker, the rabble-rouser, LSU coach Lane Kiffin, who
5:47
Speaker 2: previously coached both these guys long ago at Ole Miss,
5:51
Speaker 2: unless it really wasn't that long ago. And the dispute
5:56
Speaker 2: centers on the NCAA. They've got this five-year eligibility thingamajig,
6:02
Speaker 2: this rule, the five-year eligibility. So I'll give you the
6:04
Speaker 2: layman way this works. It extended to players from the
6:09
Speaker 2: 2022 season. Recruiting class and COVID is tied into this.
6:15
Speaker 1: And so the.
6:16
Speaker 2: Ruling says that players, players who spent time with pro
6:21
Speaker 2: teams can still return within that five year window. Now,
6:26
Speaker 2: the judge there, the honorable wink, wink, nod, nod. Someone
6:31
Speaker 2: named William Jordan, I have no idea who that is,
6:34
Speaker 2: sided with the players. Sided with the players. Heard testimony,
6:39
Speaker 2: hours and hours of testimony that included the SEC Commissioner
6:43
Speaker 2: Greg Sankey, who was in Baton Rouge to give his testimony.
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Speaker 1: So that is where we are as of this hour.
6:51
Speaker 2: LSU, when they take the field on Saturday night in
6:54
Speaker 2: Death Valley against Clemson, they will have a couple, possibly
6:58
Speaker 2: a couple of NFL players, at least on the field. Now,
7:00
Speaker 2: whether they play or not, that's up in the air.
7:03
Speaker 2: So the question is this, as we discuss, how big
7:06
Speaker 2: a deal is Coach Lane Kiffin's LSU courtroom victory So
7:13
Speaker 2: I've got Hot Tub, Lifeboat, and Himalayan. And we will
7:18
Speaker 2: combine all of these things together and we are going
7:22
Speaker 2: to face the music in this courtroom drama-o-rama.
7:28
Speaker 1: I'm ready for it. So you've got my first thought
7:30
Speaker 1: on this. You've got the micro and you have the macro.
7:34
Speaker 1: You have the micro and the macro. We'll start with
7:37
Speaker 1: the micro. So LSU for now adds a couple of former.
7:42
Speaker 2: training camp players in the NFL as Lane Kiffin tries
7:45
Speaker 2: to stockpile his roster and Lane by doing this has
7:50
Speaker 2: been able to unlock college football's ultimate recruiting weapon what
7:55
Speaker 2: is that the temporary injunction Forget the five-star quarterback. Baton Rouge,
8:03
Speaker 2: best offseason signing, and they've signed a bunch of players.
8:08
Speaker 1: You look at these stupid Fugazi recruiting things, and I
8:11
Speaker 1: don't really pay attention to that much stuff, but some
8:13
Speaker 1: of you idiots send it to me.
8:14
Speaker 2: So good recruits, right, big players and whatnot, but the
8:17
Speaker 2: biggest offseason move was the legal team and what they've
8:22
Speaker 2: been able to pull off in cahoots with Lane Kiffin.
8:25
Speaker 2: And at this point, Lane Kiffin hasn't just bent the
8:28
Speaker 2: SEC rulebook. He has dragged it into court, screaming and shouting,
8:33
Speaker 2: and then subpoenaed it. And then you've got the macro.
8:36
Speaker 2: And the macro, this isn't an eligibility spat. It's being
8:41
Speaker 2: described as, well, it's about eligibility. It is a jurisdictional,
8:45
Speaker 2: it's about jurisdiction, right? It's a cage match about jurisdiction.
8:51
Speaker 2: And the SEC's stance is, We make the rules, and
8:57
Speaker 2: that's it. And LSU said, okay, we're going to channel
9:01
Speaker 2: our inner Lee Corso and say, not so fast, my friend.
9:05
Speaker 2: So now the SEC has already sprinted over to federal court,
9:10
Speaker 2: and they're arguing that, hey, you cannot join our little club,
9:14
Speaker 2: our members-only club, And then rewrite the clubhouse rules.
9:18
Speaker 1: That's not how any of this works. You're not allowed
9:20
Speaker 1: to do it. And Lane Kiffin says, no, no, no, no, no, no.
9:24
Speaker 1: We just did it, suckers.
9:26
Speaker 2: And I was thinking about this as I was making
9:28
Speaker 2: my way into the studio, walking down the hall. And
9:30
Speaker 2: I was like, do you imagine if you could fire
9:34
Speaker 2: up the hot tub time machine and go back to,
9:38
Speaker 2: I don't know, 1995 or 2005? Let's go 2005. And
9:44
Speaker 2: there's somebody that is there in 2005. They love their
9:48
Speaker 2: college football. And you tell them 20 something years from now,
9:52
Speaker 2: there'll be an NFL player that got released at the
9:55
Speaker 2: end of training camp who will.
9:56
Speaker 1: Then go back to LSU and.
9:59
Speaker 2: Then the Southeastern Conference will sue LSU.
10:05
Speaker 1: And it'll all be playing out in real time. They'd
10:08
Speaker 1: have you committed. They'd have you, oh, that's never going
10:11
Speaker 1: to happen.
10:12
Speaker 2: Because back in 2005, they were still feeding us the
10:14
Speaker 2: bull crap about student-athlete, although I saw that annoying. I
10:17
Speaker 2: was watching some college football on Thursday night, and I
10:20
Speaker 2: saw a fair amount of the Nick Saban propaganda. And
10:24
Speaker 2: he used the term student-athlete, and I was.
10:27
Speaker 1: Like, Nick, come on, buddy. They're all getting paid, dude.
10:29
Speaker 1: What are you doing?
10:30
Speaker 2: That's why you quit, because they are getting paid. And
10:32
Speaker 2: so you ran off to do your little TV thing.
10:34
Speaker 2: and make your annoying commercials, and now you're trying to
10:37
Speaker 2: advocate votes in Capitol Hill to make it closer to
10:42
Speaker 2: the way it.
10:43
Speaker 1: Was and all that stuff, and it just makes me
10:46
Speaker 1: want to puke in my mouth.
10:48
Speaker 2: So we're just now waiting to see who actually runs
10:51
Speaker 2: college sports. Is it going to be the conference or
10:54
Speaker 2: whichever judge has the gavel?
10:57
Speaker 1: We'll find out.
10:58
Speaker 2: Now, page two, as we continue our in-depth team coverage
11:03
Speaker 2: of this southern drama The question here, what comes next
11:08
Speaker 2: in the saga between LSU, led by Lane Kiffin, and
11:13
Speaker 2: the NCAA, and really this is more about the SEC.
11:18
Speaker 2: So at this point, the way I read the room,
11:20
Speaker 2: and I'm in the corner of the room, the upper
11:21
Speaker 2: right-hand corner of the room, and I'm looking down. I'm
11:23
Speaker 2: in a bird's nest in the upper right-hand corner, and
11:26
Speaker 2: I'm looking down. They can't see me. I can see them.
11:29
Speaker 2: So what I'm looking at here, Lane Kiffin isn't just
11:33
Speaker 2: coloring outside the lines. He's using his superpowers of being
11:39
Speaker 2: a pest, and he's like, well, wait a minute. I'm
11:43
Speaker 2: going to sue over who owns the coloring book. I
11:46
Speaker 2: know it says it's the SEC coloring book, but I'm
11:49
Speaker 2: coloring outside of it, and then I'm saying, well, I
11:52
Speaker 2: own the coloring book.
11:54
Speaker 1: That's it. So LSU.
11:56
Speaker 2: can have on their roster ex-NFL players because of this
11:59
Speaker 2: judge and the injunction and all that.
12:02
Speaker 1: And there's conflicting.
12:04
Speaker 2: Reports about whether or not these guys are actually going
12:07
Speaker 2: to play. One of the stories that I've been coming
12:11
Speaker 2: across here is Daquan Wright cannot play against Clemson because
12:16
Speaker 2: of the seven-day practice rule. So I saw that and
12:21
Speaker 2: I thought, well, that's funny.
12:22
Speaker 1: That's pretty funny.
12:23
Speaker 2: Pardon us for not not betting the mortgage on anyone
12:27
Speaker 2: following the rule book anymore in baton rouge so it's
12:30
Speaker 2: like oh you got to practice for seven games or
12:33
Speaker 2: seven days or whatever no no he practiced for the
12:35
Speaker 2: cleveland browns i think he's ready to go okay good
12:38
Speaker 2: sounds good so the sec wanted to make an example
12:42
Speaker 2: out of lsu they're still trying to do that at
12:45
Speaker 2: this point in the story instead louisiana state made the
12:50
Speaker 2: SEC hire more lawyers.
12:52
Speaker 1: That's it. Just more lawyers there.
12:54
Speaker 2: And the commissioner, Greg Sankey, who traveled over to Baton
12:57
Speaker 2: Rouge to flex his authority, the Southeastern Conference authority, right?
13:04
Speaker 2: And he left there needing a federal lifeboat. That's what
13:08
Speaker 2: the SEC needs. They're going to a higher court here.
13:11
Speaker 2: And so now comes the SEC's federal lawsuit. And at
13:15
Speaker 2: this point, think of it like a boxing match. And
13:19
Speaker 2: LSU won round one 10-9. 10-9, they won round one.
13:26
Speaker 2: They have not won the heavyweight title yet. If Kiffin
13:29
Speaker 2: wins this, NFL cut-down day will become the new shopping
13:34
Speaker 2: day for the, you know, it's like the day after Christmas.
13:38
Speaker 2: You know, you return stuff, you get sales and all
13:40
Speaker 2: that stuff. In this case, it's the transfer portal. So
13:43
Speaker 2: can the SEC punish LSU anyway? It's the billion-dollar question.
13:49
Speaker 2: College football's chain of command is now what? The NCAA
13:55
Speaker 2: conference school and whichever judge answers the phone first.
14:02
Speaker 1: There's many people say, well, this is.
14:03
Speaker 2: A one time situation and it's not going to change
14:08
Speaker 2: precedent in college sports. It's because of the 2022 class.
14:13
Speaker 2: And to those people, I love your naive way of
14:17
Speaker 2: looking at the world, because what I see is an
14:20
Speaker 2: opportunity and some lawyers to say, well, there was this loophole.
14:26
Speaker 2: But college players are getting paid anyway. They're professional. The
14:29
Speaker 2: people that are in college sports don't want to admit that.
14:32
Speaker 2: When you're getting paid to do something that's a job,
14:36
Speaker 2: we call it what you want, but to me, professional.
14:39
Speaker 2: You're being paid, compensated to play football.
14:42
Speaker 1: That's it.
14:44
Speaker 2: And that's where we are. And so we'll see how
14:47
Speaker 2: this plays out. But the SEC has officially, for now, rebranded.
14:51
Speaker 1: From it just means more, which has been their slogan,
14:54
Speaker 1: it just means more, to it just means more litigation.
14:57
Speaker 1: It's the new slogan. I just added an extra word.
15:01
Speaker 1: All right, last word from.
15:03
Speaker 2: Us to the popularity contest. We'll keep the theme going,
15:07
Speaker 2: but we'll move away from LSU and Georgia.
15:11
Speaker 1: Got Georgia on my mind. Coach Kirby Smart.
15:15
Speaker 2: Kirby Smart planting the Southeastern Conference flag in a recent interview,
15:21
Speaker 2: insisting that the NFL personnel, the NFL people consistently tell
15:30
Speaker 2: him that the Southeastern Conference is superior to to the
15:35
Speaker 2: Big Ten when it comes to future NFL pedigree. Smart
15:39
Speaker 2: says NFL scouts and coaches alike overwhelmingly, overwhelmingly favor the
15:45
Speaker 2: SEC ballplayer when asked which league produces the top player, and.
15:51
Speaker 1: He said it's not even close.
15:53
Speaker 2: Now, Kirby Smart claiming that even Big Ten coaching friends
15:57
Speaker 2: privately agree, although, of course, they will not admit it publicly,
16:01
Speaker 2: can't do it publicly. Now, Smart argues the gap extends
16:04
Speaker 2: beyond just NFL talent. He said the SEC is tougher,
16:09
Speaker 2: more physical as a conference, he said, and challenging those
16:13
Speaker 2: who criticize the SEC to compare the schedules and the
16:18
Speaker 2: week-to-week competition and all that. Well, this is not a
16:21
Speaker 2: great time to talk about this because Rutgers lost to
16:23
Speaker 2: UMass from the Big Ten, which means they'll probably be
16:27
Speaker 2: decommissioned from the Big Ten.
16:28
Speaker 1: But let's address this anyway. So the question....
16:31
Speaker 2: Georgia coach Kirby Smart says the SEC remains ahead of
16:36
Speaker 2: the Big Ten, despite what has happened on the field.
16:41
Speaker 2: So how does this reshape the situation, if at all?
16:45
Speaker 2: So Kirby Smart is a senior fellow at the prestigious
16:50
Speaker 2: Trust Me Bro Institute. Yeah, the TMBI Institute. is what
16:57
Speaker 2: it's called there, the Trust Me Bro Institute of NFL Scouting.
17:02
Speaker 2: So just kind of roll your eyes, and you're like, well,
17:04
Speaker 2: come on, Kirby. I mean, that's just a great name, Kirby.
17:07
Speaker 2: You don't hear a lot of people named Kirby.
17:09
Speaker 1: You don't.
17:10
Speaker 2: And you're the head coach at Georgia. You sell the
17:15
Speaker 2: product of SEC football for a living. When you go
17:18
Speaker 2: out and offer those big cartoon checks to various players,
17:21
Speaker 2: various recruits, you're selling the SEC.
17:24
Speaker 3: See?
17:25
Speaker 2: This is not Consumer Reports breaking things down. So you
17:29
Speaker 2: take Kirby Smart's opinion with a grain of salt and
17:33
Speaker 2: probably the entire Himalayan pink salt shaker.
17:37
Speaker 1: Just have all of that Himalayan pink salt and just enjoy.
17:41
Speaker 2: Methinks the gentleman from Athens, Georgia might be slightly biased,
17:47
Speaker 2: Your Honor. It's kind of like asking a person that
17:51
Speaker 2: works as a car dealer at a Ford lot, whether
17:55
Speaker 2: or not you should go across to the other dealer
17:57
Speaker 2: and buy a Toyota. It's like, well, I don't think
18:00
Speaker 2: that's a good idea. You know, we got these cars
18:03
Speaker 2: right here.
18:03
Speaker 1: And NFL people privately agree with you, is what he said.
18:08
Speaker 1: Kirby Smart at Georgia. How convenient. How convenient.
18:11
Speaker 2: Now, I would like to point out, I want to
18:13
Speaker 2: point this out, that my imaginary friends also agree with
18:17
Speaker 2: all of my hot takes. And it's just a fact
18:19
Speaker 2: of life. And my imaginary friends believe that these are
18:23
Speaker 2: the greatest monologues you've ever heard. And it's really wonderfully
18:28
Speaker 2: packaged malarkey.
18:31
Speaker 1: That's the cut of beef. Premium USDA certified malarkey. It's propaganda.
18:38
Speaker 1: It's just absolute propaganda.
18:40
Speaker 2: Because in modern times, the Southeastern Conference keeps winning the
18:45
Speaker 2: hypothetical national championship and they have the NFL scouts who
18:49
Speaker 2: are slobbering and licking their chops. And the Big Ten
18:54
Speaker 2: keeps winning the actual one.
18:55
Speaker 1: You said Indiana. Indiana won the last championship from the
19:01
Speaker 1: Big Ten.
19:03
Speaker 2: One of, if not the single worst college football program
19:08
Speaker 2: in my time and in everyone's time won a championship.
19:12
Speaker 1: And that was not a SEC school. That was not
19:16
Speaker 1: an SEC school. It is the Ben Maller Show.
19:20
Speaker 2: If you would like to be part, you can join
19:22
Speaker 2: us right now. We'll open up the lines for the
19:23
Speaker 2: first time here at 877-99.
19:27
Speaker 1: On Fox.
19:28
Speaker 2: You can also hit us up on X at Ben Maller.
19:32
Speaker 2: That's at Ben Maller if you'd like to be part
19:34
Speaker 2: of the show. You do not have to call, by
19:37
Speaker 2: the way. I mean, it's just an option. We have
19:40
Speaker 2: plenty of things to talk about, so there is no
19:43
Speaker 2: need to call. If you have something that somebody else
19:45
Speaker 2: wants to say, you think, You want your opinion heard,
19:48
Speaker 2: this is an opportunity to do it. I know we
19:50
Speaker 2: don't talk too much college football it's a big college
19:52
Speaker 2: football night with no NFL till next week and there's
19:56
Speaker 2: some good stories this LSU story is a chef's kiss
20:00
Speaker 2: so we'll take your calls on that and anything else
20:02
Speaker 2: here 877 99 on Fox Again, the call-in number, onX
20:09
Speaker 2: at Ben Maller. Straight ahead, we've got more NFL help
20:14
Speaker 2: on the way and a direct deposit for the saddest
20:20
Speaker 2: fireworks show that we've seen in some time.
20:24
Speaker 1: We'll get to that, and we will do it!
20:30
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Speaker 4: maller show weekdays at 2 a.m eastern 11 p.m pacific
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Speaker 2: Ben Maller's show on Fox Sports Radio as we continue on.
21:18
Speaker 2: Still the 3rd of September on a Thursday. late on
21:23
Speaker 2: the west, heading into the fourth for most of the country,
21:27
Speaker 2: and still third over in Hawaii and Alaska as well,
21:30
Speaker 2: as we are just warming up the red-eye flight. A
21:35
Speaker 2: spicy hot Mallard monologue. Lane Kiffin, LSU, win round one.
21:41
Speaker 1: Round one against the Southeastern Conference. Another round expected to
21:47
Speaker 1: take place today. If it does not, if....
21:51
Speaker 2: The SEC does not get some kind of injunction than
21:54
Speaker 2: the real stories on Saturday there at Clemson or at
21:57
Speaker 2: home for LSU against Clemson and see what happens with
22:00
Speaker 2: that as we yap away the nighttime hours here.
22:03
Speaker 1: You want to be part of the show? It is interactive.
22:05
Speaker 1: It can be whatever you want it to be.
22:07
Speaker 2: You can sit there and just listen because you have
22:10
Speaker 2: insomnia or you're working in a factory somewhere, driving a truck,
22:14
Speaker 2: whatever you might be doing. We have both good guys
22:16
Speaker 2: and bad guys. We have criminals that love the show
22:18
Speaker 2: and we have The bad guys that, well, they like
22:23
Speaker 2: to show.
22:23
Speaker 1: The cops also like to show. So it's a little
22:25
Speaker 1: bit of everything. Got to have jobs.
22:30
Speaker 2: 877-99-ON-FOX is the call-in number also available for you if
22:34
Speaker 2: you want to just hide behind your fake avatar and
22:37
Speaker 2: your bogus name and all that. You can say hello,
22:41
Speaker 2: care of, at Ben Maller on X. Lorena is in
22:47
Speaker 2: the hizzy, and she's feeling great. And just really the
22:51
Speaker 2: model of health there. Say hello to Lorena, FSR Tech Queen.
22:56
Speaker 1: Not bad.
22:57
Speaker 2: No, that could be worse. And Coop, a Bronco fan.
23:03
Speaker 2: That's a Bronco fan. And if you think you're going
23:06
Speaker 2: to outfox Coop or anyone here, you're just wrong. You're
23:12
Speaker 2: just wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong. Now back to what
23:16
Speaker 2: we go. Femi writes in from the Twin Cities, the
23:19
Speaker 2: top Uber Eats driver. as far as I'm concerned. He says, hey, Ben,
23:22
Speaker 2: these lawyers are just cashing out. Didn't the Clippers say
23:26
Speaker 2: the NBA spent $ 50 million on its lawsuit? I wonder
23:30
Speaker 2: what SEC money they're paying off to the lawyers there.
23:34
Speaker 2: I should have been in law school. Yeah. The problem
23:38
Speaker 2: with that, Femi, and I don't know if these numbers
23:40
Speaker 2: are still the same because these numbers are from a.
23:43
Speaker 1: Few years ago, but every year there are.
23:46
Speaker 2: Roughly 60,000 people that pass the bar.
23:51
Speaker 1: In the United States. So there's technically 60,000 lawyers in America.
23:56
Speaker 2: This was as of a few years ago every year,
23:58
Speaker 2: 60,000 new lawyers. Now, a fair amount of people become
24:01
Speaker 2: lawyers just because it's something that was on their bucket
24:04
Speaker 2: list when they were younger and they don't actually practice law.
24:08
Speaker 2: There's a certain percentage of those lawyers that become sleazy
24:11
Speaker 2: ambulance chasing lawyers.
24:12
Speaker 1: I call them billboard lawyers.
24:14
Speaker 2: So there's a certain percentage of that. There's so many
24:17
Speaker 2: branches of law that you can go into, right? You
24:19
Speaker 2: can go into divorce law. You can go into, you know,
24:23
Speaker 2: death law. That's a fun one.
24:24
Speaker 1: Boy, that's great. Estate planning, law, lawyer crap and all that.
24:29
Speaker 2: It's a special niche if you're the big Manhattan law firms,
24:35
Speaker 2: which is typically who these leagues turn to, to investigate.
24:39
Speaker 1: It's pretty... Pretty wild.
24:42
Speaker 2: Late Night Drug Tester writes in, he says, just looking
24:44
Speaker 2: at the history of Lane Kiffin, even with players that
24:47
Speaker 2: couldn't play in the NFL, he will still find a
24:51
Speaker 2: way to screw it up unless he brings Nick Saban
24:55
Speaker 2: in as head coach. Yes, I'm sure Lane will stand
24:58
Speaker 2: down and allow Nick to take over. And for a
25:02
Speaker 2: guy that hasn't had that big-time run, the greatest team
25:05
Speaker 2: Lane Kiffin had was at Ole Miss last year, and
25:08
Speaker 2: he quit on Ole Miss to run off to LSU.
25:11
Speaker 1: That was a fluke.
25:12
Speaker 2: He obviously admitted that was a fluke, what he did
25:14
Speaker 2: at LSU last year, putting that team together. He couldn't
25:16
Speaker 2: do it again, otherwise he would have stayed. Otherwise he
25:18
Speaker 2: would have stayed. So he ran off to LSU. We
25:21
Speaker 2: talked about this the other day. When he got run
25:24
Speaker 2: out of Tennessee, they were like a 7-6 team that year.
25:28
Speaker 2: SC was the preseason number one team, and they got
25:32
Speaker 2: smoked by Arizona State, and he got fired at LAX
25:35
Speaker 2: last year.
25:37
Speaker 1: They weren't a good team.
25:37
Speaker 2: The Raiders were, he was a young lad with the
25:40
Speaker 2: Raiders in his early 30s, but they were not.
25:41
Speaker 1: A good team. Obviously, Al Davis hated Lane Kiffin.
25:45
Speaker 2: He's the common denominator in all that. The Baltimore Freeloader
25:50
Speaker 2: account writes in and says, a rough night here in
25:53
Speaker 2: the Charmed City. Adley Rushman comes back with the Red
25:57
Speaker 2: Sox and treats the Orioles like clam chowder. I can't
26:01
Speaker 2: stand clam chowder, but I like a good knish, unlike A.J.
26:05
Speaker 1: Brzezinski.
26:06
Speaker 2: I know what it is, and so do you. A
26:09
Speaker 2: great section at the yard. A great selection at the yard.
26:12
Speaker 2: I have rumors, though. They have a kosher food stand
26:16
Speaker 2: in Baltimore. They do not sell matzo ball soup, which
26:19
Speaker 2: seems like blasphemy. If I was the health department, I'd
26:23
Speaker 2: shut that place down. You've got to serve some matzo
26:24
Speaker 2: ball soup. That's a bad job by you. You have
26:27
Speaker 2: to add up. Truck Stop Fungus writes in, and he
26:33
Speaker 2: found Kathy and Madison. Truck Stop Fungus is sitting in
26:36
Speaker 2: his tighty-whities at a sleazy one-star hotel with bedbugs hopping
26:42
Speaker 2: on and off the bed somewhere in the boondocks of Arkansas,
26:47
Speaker 2: eating a bowl of chili with his belly hanging over
26:50
Speaker 2: his tighty-whities. And he's very excited that he found Kathy,
26:54
Speaker 2: who listens to the show every night. on a different affiliate.
26:58
Speaker 2: She loves flipping around and finding the show on different
27:01
Speaker 2: stations and all that. Now, Trek Stop Fungus also says
27:03
Speaker 2: if college athletes weren't getting paid, these former NFL players
27:07
Speaker 2: wouldn't be interested. This isn't going to end well. Exactly, yes,
27:11
Speaker 2: they're going because they can't make NFL money. And the
27:14
Speaker 2: sweet spot, we talked about this in a previous episode
27:18
Speaker 2: of the show, if you're on the practice squad, and
27:20
Speaker 2: who knows if these guys would even be on the
27:21
Speaker 2: practice squad, but if you're on the practice squad... A
27:25
Speaker 2: first-year player on the practice squad, somewhere around $ 250, 000, which
27:28
Speaker 2: seems like a good amount of money to me. But
27:31
Speaker 2: for them, it's like not enough. And they can go
27:32
Speaker 2: play at LSU and make more than that. So they're
27:34
Speaker 2: going to go for the money.
27:36
Speaker 1: Money, money, money. Money, money, money.
27:39
Speaker 2: Not a burner says, I'm very interested in hearing about
27:42
Speaker 2: your imaginary friends. Could you please elaborate on these figments
27:47
Speaker 2: of your imagination? Yeah, well, I think you know a
27:50
Speaker 2: couple of them. I think you know two or three
27:53
Speaker 2: of my imaginary friends.
27:55
Speaker 1: I believe you do.
27:56
Speaker 2: Michael in Tulsa writes in and says, Ben, malarkey is
28:01
Speaker 2: nowhere near as good as the gabagoo, the baba ganoush,
28:05
Speaker 2: or the jambalaya. That's Michael chiming in. Random Ryan in
28:11
Speaker 2: Carolina checks in. He says, Rod Tidwell walked for $ 11
28:17
Speaker 2: million so Michael Wilson could run for $ 75 million. Who
28:22
Speaker 2: is the better value? What say you? Boogity, boogity, boogity, boogity, boogity, boogity, boogity.
28:30
Speaker 1: Yes, the great Rod Tidwell. Show me the money.
28:32
Speaker 4: Legend.
28:34
Speaker 3: Legend.
28:35
Speaker 1: Legend, legend, legend.
28:38
Speaker 2: Listen, the Arizona Cardinals are so irrelevant.
28:44
Speaker 1: How irrelevant are they? Thanks for asking.
28:48
Speaker 2: They signed a player to a contract worth almost $ 80 million,
28:52
Speaker 2: and the only reason we're mentioning this is because of
28:54
Speaker 2: our friend here who.
28:56
Speaker 1: Brought it up, Random Ryan. That's how irrelevant they are.
28:59
Speaker 1: Michael Wilson. Can you imagine that? $ 78 million.
29:02
Speaker 2: You play on a team going nowhere, dead-end team, and
29:07
Speaker 2: don't have to worry about ever playing in a big game.
29:10
Speaker 2: You get an average of $ 25.
29:12
Speaker 1: Million per year for Michael Wilson. My God. Yikes. Yikes, yikes, yikes, yikes, yikes. Yeah,
29:24
Speaker 1: so I think it was $ 25 million. Maybe it was
29:27
Speaker 1: less than that. It might have been less than that.
29:30
Speaker 1: I think the average.
29:31
Speaker 2: The estimation was he should have been $ 18 million. Should
29:34
Speaker 2: have been $ 18 million. He ended up with $ 25 million.
29:36
Speaker 3: Yeah.
29:36
Speaker 1: So. that's a little nutso. A little nutso.
29:43
Speaker 2: All right, we got some calls. Let's go to the phones.
29:45
Speaker 2: It is a call and show. And also the other
29:48
Speaker 2: knuckleheads on Twitter will get to that. I did want
29:49
Speaker 2: to mention LSU. They're not done apparently adding NFL players.
29:55
Speaker 1: There are reports.
29:57
Speaker 2: In the bowels of the dark web that that LSU
30:03
Speaker 2: looking to add another NFL bounce-back player, defensive back Blake Cotton.
30:10
Speaker 2: I have no idea who that is. Apparently he played
30:13
Speaker 2: for the Utes.
30:14
Speaker 1: What is a Ute?
30:16
Speaker 2: He was a defensive back there. He attempted to play
30:19
Speaker 2: for the Denver Broncos, and it did not work out.
30:23
Speaker 2: He spent the offseason with the Broncos. He was released
30:26
Speaker 2: last month, which was like last week.
30:29
Speaker 1: And that's it. Not finalized. Not finalized.
30:33
Speaker 2: They are looking to add LSU, another former NFL player.
30:41
Speaker 1: So that's outstanding. That is outstanding.
30:45
Speaker 3: All right, let's see.
30:45
Speaker 1: What do we got here? Let's go to the phones. Eeny, meeny, miny, moe.
30:48
Speaker 1: Pick a caller by their name and see who do
30:51
Speaker 1: we have. Let's go to....
30:56
Speaker 2: Let's go to Anthony in Louisiana.
30:58
Speaker 1: Hello, Anthony. Welcome. What's going on, Anthony?
31:01
Speaker 4: Hey, how you doing?
31:03
Speaker 2: If I was any better, Anthony, I'd be a Kiffin,
31:08
Speaker 2: but not Lane Kiffin. Well, I guess I would be Lane.
31:10
Speaker 2: He makes a lot of money, and he's got a
31:12
Speaker 2: lot of power and all that. You a big Lane
31:15
Speaker 2: Kiffin fan there?
31:16
Speaker 6: Yeah, I like Alabama.
31:19
Speaker 1: Oh, that's right. Even though you live in Louisiana, you
31:21
Speaker 1: hate LSU.
31:22
Speaker 7: Gotcha, gotcha.
31:25
Speaker 4: I hope you have a good weekend, man.
31:27
Speaker 2: Well, it's very kind of you to say that. Are
31:29
Speaker 2: you going to listen to the Fifth Hour podcast, Anthony?
31:31
Speaker 2: Do you want to come on the mailbag sometime? People
31:33
Speaker 2: would love to hear you on the mailbag.
31:35
Speaker 4: They do?
31:37
Speaker 1: Yeah, they'd love to hear you. Absolutely. Come on. The
31:39
Speaker 1: witty commentary?
31:40
Speaker 6: Hey, cuz.
31:43
Speaker 7: How's Lorena doing?
31:45
Speaker 1: I'm a little under the weather. Do you have any advice?
31:49
Speaker 1: Do you have any advice, Anthony, for Lorena to feel better?
31:52
Speaker 6: Yeah, Lorena, when you go home, go home and drink something.
31:54
Speaker 4: Let me teach.
31:56
Speaker 1: Oh, that is good advice.
31:57
Speaker 7: Thank you.
31:58
Speaker 3: I love you, cuz.
31:59
Speaker 1: You're the best. Thank you for caring for me, my guy.
32:02
Speaker 7: Okay.
32:04
Speaker 1: All right. Thank you. All right.
32:06
Speaker 3: Go away.
32:07
Speaker 2: That's unbelievable commentary. You will not get that anywhere else.
32:11
Speaker 2: Nobody else has that because nobody else will allow.
32:13
Speaker 3: Him on the air.
32:14
Speaker 1: Let's go to Daryl in New Orleans. What's going on, Daryl?
32:18
Speaker 3: Welcome.
32:19
Speaker 1: You're on Fox Sports Radio.
32:20
Speaker 3: Hey, talk to me.
32:23
Speaker 1: If I was any better, I'm fine. What's going on, Darrell?
32:26
Speaker 1: What you got, man?
32:28
Speaker 3: Lane Kiffin irritates my soul. He's muddying the waters. He's
32:34
Speaker 3: taking the purity out of the game.
32:36
Speaker 7: You know, I don't know.
32:40
Speaker 3: I think the game is fine without him. My son
32:42
Speaker 3: played for him last year. My son played at all.
32:44
Speaker 1: Oh, really? Wow.
32:46
Speaker 3: Okay. Number 44, Andrew Jones.
32:50
Speaker 1: Cool.
32:50
Speaker 3: And he pulled him from Grambling. But I just, you know,
32:56
Speaker 3: he made kids a bunch of promises of, you know,
33:00
Speaker 3: furthering their play time with the NCAA. He broke a
33:06
Speaker 3: lot of kids' hearts, man. He really did. So I
33:11
Speaker 3: hope he has.
33:11
Speaker 2: What was that like as a father of a player?
33:14
Speaker 2: Did Lane come out and try to recruit? He obviously
33:17
Speaker 2: recruited your son. You said your son was at Grambling.
33:19
Speaker 1: Is that what you said?
33:20
Speaker 3: Yeah. Actually, the current coach is who actually recruited my son.
33:26
Speaker 1: Oh, okay.
33:27
Speaker 3: I got you. I never shook Lane Kiffin's hand. But
33:32
Speaker 3: needless to say, I hope he has a horrible time
33:36
Speaker 3: at LSU, to be quite honest with you. But I
33:40
Speaker 3: don't think he quite understands. At Ole Miss– They could
33:45
Speaker 3: tolerate a loss, you know, two or three losses. He's
33:49
Speaker 3: not going to have that same tolerance in Louisiana, in
33:52
Speaker 3: Baton Rouge. He can lose two losses. He can have
33:56
Speaker 3: two losses if he wants to and think he'll be
33:57
Speaker 3: okay for next year. But two losses at LSU, they're
34:01
Speaker 3: looking to get rid of your butt for next year.
34:05
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think he's got more than one year, though,
34:07
Speaker 2: because of that money. I mean, they do have some
34:09
Speaker 2: rich boosters at LSU, but, yeah, that's like, what.
34:11
Speaker 1: $ 90 million? That's $ 90 million. That's a lot to pay
34:14
Speaker 1: out after. You've got to give them at least a
34:15
Speaker 1: couple years, right?
34:17
Speaker 2: Now, obviously, the other thing, Daryl, you know, because your
34:20
Speaker 2: son played college football, if the NCAA, if they win,
34:24
Speaker 2: and let's say, like, Lane gets suspended or something like that,
34:28
Speaker 2: I guess they could get rid of him.
34:30
Speaker 1: There's some loopholes in the contract and all.
34:32
Speaker 3: That, but it's pretty crazy.
34:34
Speaker 7: Look at it from this perspective, man. If you're going
34:38
Speaker 7: to say that, hey, I can.
34:43
Speaker 3: Score 100 points in a basketball game and everybody on
34:48
Speaker 3: the court is 3'5, 3'5 inches tall, do you think
34:55
Speaker 3: that that would be a good game or something like that?
34:58
Speaker 3: I've actually.
35:00
Speaker 6: did this phenomenal thing. If Lane Kiffin actually becomes successful
35:06
Speaker 6: with the NFL players and he goes and he hypothetically
35:10
Speaker 6: wins a national championship, it would be muddy because people
35:15
Speaker 6: will feel like he cheated.
35:18
Speaker 1: Yeah, well, some will, but others will just say, well,
35:21
Speaker 1: we won. It doesn't matter and all that. Did your
35:23
Speaker 1: son benefit, Daryl, from any NIL? Did he get a
35:26
Speaker 1: little money there, I hope, at least a little bit, something?
35:30
Speaker 3: I won't speak his business, man, but he enjoyed his
35:33
Speaker 3: time at Ole Miss, man. All right. I enjoyed watching
35:37
Speaker 3: him at Ole Miss, and I am forever an Ole
35:40
Speaker 3: Miss fan. I'm from Louisiana.
35:42
Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying? Okay. I got you. I
35:45
Speaker 1: got you. You're a hottie-tottie, right? Is that what they say?
35:47
Speaker 3: Hottie-tottie. Hottie-tottie guy.
35:50
Speaker 1: All right, my man. Thanks for listening. All right. Appreciate it.
35:52
Speaker 1: Thank you.
35:53
Speaker 3: All right.
35:53
Speaker 1: Good luck to you. There you go. How about that, Daryl?
35:55
Speaker 1: Check it in.
35:56
Speaker 2: We have no way of verifying that, but it seems legit.
35:59
Speaker 2: It says his son played for Lane Kiffin at Ole Miss.
36:04
Speaker 2: I'm sure Daryl's done this, but if you want to
36:07
Speaker 2: fall down a rabbit hole, type in It's one of
36:11
Speaker 2: the search engines or whatever thingamajig AI and like lies
36:15
Speaker 2: told by Lane Kiffin.
36:20
Speaker 1: He will lie right to your face. He is the
36:23
Speaker 1: definition of a weasel.
36:25
Speaker 3: Yeah.
36:26
Speaker 1: All right.
36:26
Speaker 2: Well, we mentioned LSU looking to add another. Another NFL player.
36:32
Speaker 2: We'll push back this, but direct deposit and some sad fireworks.
36:35
Speaker 1: We'll get to that.
36:36
Speaker 2: We have the Who Am I game right now. They'll
36:38
Speaker 2: go to baseball for the Who Am I game. The
36:40
Speaker 2: Dodgers picked up their first home win. They beat the
36:42
Speaker 2: Cardinals late. Came back to beat the Redbirds. The Dodgers
36:46
Speaker 2: picked up their first home win since August 17th, 1988,
36:49
Speaker 2: in which a Dodgers starter.
36:54
Speaker 2: In this case Tarek Skubal, allowed 10-plus hits with no
36:57
Speaker 2: extra base hits. I was the last Dodgers starter back
37:02
Speaker 2: in that season years ago that started, gave up that
37:06
Speaker 2: many hits, and still ended up the Dodgers winning that
37:10
Speaker 2: game at home.
37:11
Speaker 1: Who am I? The answer, we'll get to it, and
37:15
Speaker 1: we will do it.
37:18
Speaker 4: Next be sure to catch live editions of the ben
37:21
Speaker 4: maller show weekdays at 2 a.m eastern 11 p.m pacific.
37:25
Speaker 2: The ben maller show on fox sports radio the friday
37:30
Speaker 2: edition reminder that means a brand new episode of the
37:35
Speaker 2: fifth hour.
37:38
Speaker 1: With ben maller i know what a name Amazing.
37:41
Speaker 2: The bonus hour, you get that every Friday, Saturday, Sunday.
37:44
Speaker 2: It's only available via the podcast. It's exclusive for the
37:48
Speaker 2: real P1s.
37:49
Speaker 1: They love it.
37:50
Speaker 2: So check out the real fifth hour today, the postgame
37:53
Speaker 2: show from what was another magical weekend in Vegas, meeting
37:57
Speaker 2: so many great fans of the show, friends of the show,
38:00
Speaker 2: people that help us get through the overnight together, part
38:04
Speaker 2: of our nocturnal family who traveled from near and far there.
38:07
Speaker 1: So we'll Go back and look at some of the
38:09
Speaker 1: highlights of that. Check that out. Fifth Hour Podcast available everywhere.
38:13
Speaker 1: It'll be up later on today.
38:14
Speaker 2: And when you're done listening to this show, you can
38:16
Speaker 2: hear that show.
38:18
Speaker 1: Thank you. All right, back to it. Time now. Before
38:21
Speaker 1: we pay off the Who Am I game, I do
38:22
Speaker 1: want to mention this. What a night.
38:24
Speaker 2: For Rutgers football. Holy crap on a cracker, Batman. Rutgers
38:29
Speaker 2: did the impossible. They got mollywhopped by UMass.
38:35
Speaker 1: They lost.
38:36
Speaker 2: They were down 24-7 at halftime to the Minutemen of
38:41
Speaker 2: UMass and end up losing 37.
38:44
Speaker 1: They gave up 37 points. A Big Ten. I know
38:47
Speaker 1: they're not a.
38:47
Speaker 2: Real Big Ten team, but still, they're technically in the
38:49
Speaker 2: Big Ten. Rutgers lost 37-21 at.
38:53
Speaker 1: Home.
38:54
Speaker 2: At home, obviously, they're not going to go play at UMass.
38:57
Speaker 2: and Greg Sciano's already on the hot seat at Rutgers.
39:00
Speaker 2: It gets even better, though.
39:01
Speaker 1: So UMass figured, hey, we'll go in there, we'll get
39:06
Speaker 1: a check, we'll lose. Well, they won, so they got
39:08
Speaker 1: a check anyway.
39:09
Speaker 2: 1.5 million Rutgers had to pay after the Scarlet Knights
39:14
Speaker 2: embarrassed themselves, and then they had planned a big fireworks
39:16
Speaker 2: show to celebrate the start of their new season and
39:19
Speaker 2: all the optimism.
39:20
Speaker 1: So they figured, well, we'll beat UMass. We'll play a
39:23
Speaker 1: bunch of fireworks. Well, they didn't beat UMass.
39:25
Speaker 2: And pretty much everyone left the stadium because they were
39:28
Speaker 2: so pissed at the Scarlet Knights. And then they still
39:31
Speaker 2: shut off the fireworks.
39:33
Speaker 1: It's so funny. There's a bunch of.
39:35
Speaker 2: Video online of this empty stadium in Jersey and all
39:39
Speaker 2: these fireworks.
39:40
Speaker 1: Oh, it was so freaking good.
39:42
Speaker 2: Anyway, here's the— it' s hilarious.
39:45
Speaker 1: So not for them, but for me. Dodger pitcher— here we go.
39:48
Speaker 2: Dodgers picked up their first home win since 1988, in
39:53
Speaker 2: which a Dodger starter allowed 10 or more hits, no
39:56
Speaker 2: extra base hits. I was the starter that day. The
39:58
Speaker 2: Dodgers won against the Cardinals here with Tarek Skubal.
40:02
Speaker 1: Getting it done.
40:03
Speaker 2: Michael in Tulsa says a knucklehead. Pat Neshek, who's 46
40:07
Speaker 2: today from Late Night Drug Tester. The shuttlecock of sports
40:10
Speaker 2: talk from Not a Burner. Adrian Peterson, guest by Femi.
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Speaker 2: Pedro Astacio, good name by Alf.
40:16
Speaker 1: I love it. Bert Hooten, another good name from Robbie
40:19
Speaker 1: the Mariner fan. Who else do we have? Page down.
40:21
Speaker 1: Tim Belcher from Richard. That's a good name.
40:23
Speaker 2: Bill Belichick's spiraling legacy, guest by Curmudgeon Wayne.
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Speaker 1: What say you, Lorena? Quick rate. Joshua Bays. Nope, it's
40:30
Speaker 1: John Tudor. John Tudor. Back in 88 against the Phillies.
40:35
Speaker 1: John Tudor.