Latest / The Danger Zoo / A Few Beers / Long Rest at Home Base

Transcript

A Few Beers / Long Rest at Home Base · The Danger Zoo

0:02
Password accepted. Welcome to the Danger Zoo, OK?
0:08
Let's do this. Everybody, welcome to the Danger
0:12
Zoo, the department of anomalous and non human Genetic entities,
0:15
Reconnaissance and zoological operations.
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I am the game warden. El Coyote here with most of the
0:23
guys. Pretty Kitty baby birds here,
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hazy and thoughty. So it's a little bit different
0:28
this time, girls. We are headed home because
0:31
everybody's tired and everyone's sick of this.
0:33
So we're going to kick this off. The mission start, return to the
0:39
habitat after days in the field, chasing shadows and dodging veil
0:43
interference. The danger Zoo operatives return
0:45
to the one place they can breathe for 1/2 a second.
0:49
HB 10 The Habitat Bunker, which implies there was nine other
0:53
ones hidden four stories beneath the ruins of an abandoned high
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school in Redacted. The bunker isn't much to look at
1:00
from the surface. Cracked concrete, rusted fencing
1:02
in an old janitor's closet that reeks of mildew in mystery.
1:05
But inside, it's home, sort of access comes to the most
1:10
undignified method imaginable. A hand in a toilet bowl,
1:13
pressing the concealed button beneath the rim.
1:16
The elevator shutters to life, groaning like it resents every
1:18
floor it descends. Sounds of heavy elevator chains
1:21
clanking. Faint synth goes.
1:24
We go down, and then the door opens.
1:25
Warm, flickering lights illuminate the habitat.
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Old couches form a loose perimeter around a dented coffee
1:31
table covered in stickers. A beanbag chair sags in the
1:34
corner like it's seen war and lots of farts. 2 arcade machines
1:39
buzz Life in the shadows. Capcom versus Marvel and House
1:41
of the Dead 2 set to play for free.
1:46
Now this place changes every time we come here, so the way
1:50
I've set this up is every time the bunker is completely empty,
1:54
it rearranges the room and that is the best way I have figured
1:56
out to keep the Veil from finding this bunker as opposed
1:59
to some of the other bunkers they found us in.
2:02
My favorite spot here is Thadi's Bar.
2:04
It's called Thoughts and Shots and it's got a big old sign
2:08
above it. Yeah.
2:12
As we walk in, we are greeted by what looks like an old British
2:17
man. This is Kingsley.
2:20
Don't worry about him. He was a once renowned bartender
2:23
and AVIP waiter at a shadow upscale underground club in
2:26
Miami, and he was known for remembering A patron's drink
2:29
after one glance and eavesdropping on Mafia deals
2:32
without blinking. Then he moved to Atlanta to
2:35
where he single handedly helped police take down the Black Mafia
2:39
family. Black.
2:42
Yeah, they were a big deal in the Atlanta in the 90s.
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I think that's where he that's where he met Coyote.
2:48
During one of Coyotes less official gigs, they bonded over
2:52
a botched drink order, a stolen artifact and the mutual ability
2:56
to keep secrets. They slept together.
2:59
Gay. After the club mysteriously
3:04
caught fire, Coyote swears it wasn't him.
3:07
Kingsley retired from the nightlife and accepted a
3:09
discreet offer from Coyote to manage HB 10 as its personal
3:13
Butler, quartermaster and passive aggressive morale
3:15
officer. He is 44 years old.
3:18
He has a silky British baritone with an occasional sarcastic
3:21
Barb. His vibe is equal parts Alfred
3:24
Pennyworth and Vegas VIP bottle service host.
3:28
His alias at the Trapeze was known as the Glove Love because
3:32
he used to wear white gloves when he served people their
3:34
drinks because he thought they were all gross.
3:35
So that's Kingsley. Let's go ahead and put Kingsley
3:39
out of the way. Oh, jolly good folks.
3:42
Glad you've all returned. Would someone like a bottle of
3:46
gin? Hey fuck no, who drinks gin?
3:49
Everyone drinks gin. Yeah, dude.
3:51
Yeah, you know, I'm not a big gin guy.
3:55
You. You're right.
3:55
Jarvis. Jarvis, I'll take a bottle of
3:58
gin. Right.
4:00
Oh, Mr. Bird, off he goes to get your chin.
4:07
All right, boys, this is this is the place.
4:10
Does anybody else hate that guy? Yeah, we should murder him.
4:16
God he works here. Stop murdering random people,
4:19
assholes. All right, everybody stack on
4:22
me. We're going to clear this place.
4:25
All right, that's what we're doing.
4:29
Let me know where you want to go.
4:31
I can't trust her as British people.
4:33
I want to go get a thought shot. Hey, Hazy just books it in and
4:38
he cuts up north to the thought shot, and so he's sitting at the
4:41
bar. I guess I'll go man my bar, it's
4:44
time for me to get to work. Oh, you want to relieve Kingsley
4:49
of working the bar? Oh, I hate that guy.
4:51
I don't trust him. I mean, it's literally named
4:54
after me so. All right, well, you come in
4:57
here, you grab Kingsley, throw him out.
5:01
I'm. I come over there.
5:02
Sorry, Kingsley. You know, new crew you got, you
5:04
got to get used to it. He's like, oh, yes, I
5:06
understand. Would anyone like some tea?
5:09
God damn it, Kingsley. No, we don't drink tea.
5:12
I told you this. It's coffee.
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I slapped the cups of tea out of his hand.
5:18
Hey, I'll I'll take it. I'll take a sweet tea.
5:21
It's coffee, nothing else. Get out of here, Kingsley Hazy.
5:25
You'll drink coffee or you'll shut your cake hole.
5:27
No, I want to see if he knows what the fuck a sweet tea is.
5:30
What about? What about sweet tea?
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Sweet ice tea. Look, look, I'm I don't like
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sweet tea, right? But I'm not against it.
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And Kingsley makes the absolute best sweet tea out of anyone in
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the South, from what I hear. Oh.
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I hate this guy. Because he learned from that one
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fat white lady who likes to say the N word on TV that.
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Cooking. Whatever her name is.
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What he? Learned to make from her, he
5:54
puts. It's four cups of sugar and it's
5:56
a teaspoon of tea. I don't know.
5:59
Sounds about right. However you guys like it, but
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it's the principle. The Americans are here.
6:04
He can make some coffee for a little bit before he goes back
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to making tea. Sweet here.
6:08
Yeah. Cheerio, all that jazz.
6:11
I don't know. I'm going to go check out the
6:12
bookshelf over here. OK, you come in and you go north
6:16
and then east to the bookshelf. This right here, Pretty Kitty,
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is our library of lore. You spend quite a bit of time
6:23
here investigating and reading up on lore.
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I tend to use the computer more so, but I do buy you books every
6:31
pension day and I throw some in there for you to keep you busy.
6:34
Keep your ADHD under control. Pension.
6:37
Don't worry about that. Yes, I got a pension.
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You got a problem with my pension?
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Now you're just old, that's all. Fuck you.
6:50
Does anybody want to drink? Yeah, vodka, please.
6:55
That's it. Just does vodka in a glass.
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Would you like a ice? A glass.
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A little bit of, oh, you just want me to give you a bottle and
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or you actually know I'm just going to pour it in your mouth.
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That's what you get is. This Slapple.
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I I, I forgot to show you, I installed these two little
7:13
chains that hang down here. I'm going to hold on to the
7:15
chains and you're going to treat me like one of those dirty bar
7:18
wenches at the Renfra. You're going to slap my face
7:20
while you feed me my alcohol? Oh well, I pour like bottom
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shelf plastic bottle vodka down your throat.
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We only buy plastic handles. These got like motor boats.
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You mean slap the shit out on? Yeah, let me see the big rugby
7:36
titties boy, OK? That costs extra.
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Baby bird, are you going to walk in the doorway or you just going
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to hang out here? Yeah, I'm still stacked up.
7:47
I got a flash bang in my no, I'm just kidding.
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I'm going to go use the bathroom because it's been a long car
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ride. All right, so he comes in, he
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goes down the hallway. When you get here, go ahead and
8:00
roll a luck check. Oh.
8:02
No. I was wondering what that random
8:05
shape on the ground was. I rolled A5.
8:10
All right, you step on the trap the Roomba releases from one of
8:18
these rooms and he's got a Claymore mind on him, and he
8:21
starts just doing circles in the hallway here.
8:23
What the fuck? He moves over here.
8:26
Wait, is that a little tiny doorway?
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The Is that like a Roomba door? This one, now it's just a
8:33
regular door, but the Roomba is like he goes in here with his
8:36
little claymore. So the whole time we're in here,
8:39
we have to avoid a moving mine. No you don't.
8:44
You could just not step on the trap to activate him and we
8:47
would have been fine. Anyways, Baby, where do you you
8:53
make it past the trap and you go to the bathroom.
8:55
Good job. What does Hazy want to drink?
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You want me to give you the same treatment I gave Coyote?
9:03
No, I'll just take a shot of whiskey, please.
9:07
Oh yeah? Who's here?
9:07
You take your whiskey neat, do you?
9:09
All right. Before I drink it, I want to
9:11
investigate the whole bar area. I just want to like look around
9:15
before I, you know, I just saw some.
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Do I see the mining or the Roomba with the mine on it?
9:23
I don't know, can you see through walls?
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There's an open doorway. Can I see it moving around?
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That open doorway goes like the hallway there.
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He came in and he went off to the left.
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He's over here. Do we not hear it?
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Is it not loud? No, it's a Roomba.
9:39
They're not. They're not that loud normally.
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They're yeah, they're not typically very loud.
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Plus it's hard to hear anything over thoughty calling me a good
9:48
girl and slapping vodka in my mouth.
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There was a point where I I got a mouthful of it and I spit it
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in your mouth. Oh God stop, I can only get so.
10:04
I give Hazy a glass of whiskey my own home home batch I made.
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Very nice. Oh God, we got moonshine in
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here. I mean, I guess this is not tax,
10:15
it's technically moonshine. Sweet, I'll take some apple pie
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moonshine if we got it. No white lighting for me.
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I never. Said anything about me having
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apple pie, you know, slowly roll.
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Is it white lightning? Yeah.
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Do I look like I know anything about handling food?
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It's not actual food. I will.
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I will walk across this hallway and then go to the room with the
10:39
two discs in it and check that room out, see if I can find
10:42
anything. Give me a look check.
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All right, so 20 plus charisma, Where is my charisma -1 sorry,
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11 minus. Your charisma is +1.
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Remember you put your two points there.
10:58
Oh. All right, so 12 then.
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All right, as you're in here, the little rumor comes in, Burn
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the Claymore comes up to you and it goes off and it's just
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confetti that just goes in there.
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And then the rumor starts cleaning up all the confetti I
11:13
just shot at you. What a fun existence for that
11:19
little robot. Go ahead and give me a scaredy
11:22
puss roll. Yours is really high.
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I think you have to score under an 81 because you grew up with
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so much insane supernatural stuff around you.
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You have the highest scaredy plus stuff.
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So roll the D100. It's 40, you're fine.
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It it goes off and you go and then your ADHD just completely
11:40
forgets what happens. You start looking at the stuff
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on the desk over here and the room, it just keeps going.
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I think I like that room, but better than the Butler, so we're
11:47
good. Yeah, that room is pretty
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fucking cool. Kingsley leans in the doorway.
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Did you say something, Master Hazer?
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Yeah, fuck off, that's what I said.
12:05
Yeah, right away, Sir. Just look at you.
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Stop being such a Dick to Kingsley, man.
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He's a nice dude. I'm pretty sure we won that war.
12:14
We earned that right. Hey, he's really cool with
12:16
really soft hands, very passionate about his job.
12:21
Leave him alone. My bad, my bad.
12:24
Baby bird, you done shitting in there?
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What is happening? I'm off now.
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Without me. Kingsley hears you about to
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finish and he pops up with the moist towelette.
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Moist towelette? Mr. Bad No.
12:38
Thanks. Man, he's trying his best to get
12:45
us to like him. No Diddy, let me help you out.
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This is his job. That's a little.
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Suspicious, if you ask me. Wipies please.
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Everyone give me a perception check also for people that are
13:03
just listening while my guys do their checks.
13:05
In the top left corner there is our sofas and one video game
13:10
machine and then to the right, actually it's not a video game
13:12
machine, that's a heart monitoring machine that used to
13:14
sit down when your mom was getting her medicine at CVS.
13:17
Oh nice. And then next door, we got our
13:19
video games. We got to work. 2 workout rooms,
13:22
1 here. One by the bath house that Hazy
13:24
created for some reason. It used to be showers, but now
13:27
you can only take baths, which is all right.
13:30
Couple of workbenches in here. There's a skate park over here
13:32
that Hazy wanted right at the entrance to confuse anyone who
13:35
broke in. And there's Armory over here.
13:37
And there's a vault called Vault 13 hidden somewhere in here.
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That is where we store all of the cursed objects.
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Nice and certain weaponry. We'll get into that later.
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What's everyone's perception check?
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I rolled A4. OK. 16.
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I got a 17. I got a 12.
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I rolled A2 baby bird and I don't notice anything.
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I started going over here and I start banging on the door
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telling baby bird to get out of here.
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You guys, all of a sudden something feels weird.
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Something feels like it's leaking in and all of a sudden
14:17
you just hear bam. After 10,000 years I'm finally
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free. Wait, that's got my life.
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Quit. Oh shit.
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And you see this Gray little monster.
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I am buck watching and you bubbling dangerous superfoods
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are as clueless as ever. Oh sorry guys I I forgot to let
14:53
the dog back in. That is not the dog.
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Why is its Dick so big yo? That's his leg.
15:02
Oh, third leg Anyways, it's dragging on the floor.
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That is it. Walk.
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It's walking. That's what she said.
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It's using it as a cage. Anyways, this thing pops up and
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you all are like kind of freaked out.
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Anyways, as baby bird comes out I like turn the letter about
15:23
when I notice this here and I go fuck everyone come in your ears
15:27
now. But nobody covers their ears.
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In time, this thing lets out a little cackle to himself.
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Yeah, let's see how you like the stink of monsters blood when
15:42
it's your own. Let it Rock You from the inside.
15:49
And all of a sudden he uses a psychic blast of his and
15:57
everyone gets hit by it. Now Baby Bird and I are not
16:01
knocked unconscious. Everyone else is what?
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Bom Yay bom. How rude.
16:08
You're all knocked unconscious and when you come to, we're
16:11
going to take a little intermission here, then you guys
16:19
all wake up. Hey.
16:23
Now when you wake up, I put you all over here by the bar outside
16:26
it, and I'm just scanning. You scan, scan, scan, scan,
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scan. And I back up and I'm like, oh
16:32
good, they're waking up. Baby bird, you want to say
16:34
anything to the unconscious Ding Dongs?
16:36
Yeah, I do. Did you guys see the size of
16:42
that thing? Anyways, moving on.
16:47
I did. Jesus, I performed medical scans
16:51
on all of you and this is what I have found out.
16:54
So what just happened was that was Pug Wood G.
16:57
He is a trickster of Native American folklore.
17:01
He voices mimicry, phantom projections, and he can vanish.
17:04
Which he fucking did, but he left his cursed object here so
17:08
we can track him down and bring him back up if need to.
17:11
The cursed object he left is called a laughing bone.
17:15
A funny bone like from your elbow it.
17:17
Kind of, says Dick. Bone, Dick bone.
17:21
But he left it on purpose for us.
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No, he just couldn't take it with him because I pulled out
17:26
the trap for him and he disappeared without it.
17:28
So he's escaped, but he's still kind of tethered to us.
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Sweet. So everybody read your your
17:37
readouts. This has now awoken some
17:40
supernatural feats that has happened to you guys.
17:42
So thought of you to read yours first.
17:45
This is what happened during the Sheep Man episode.
17:48
Yay, so my subject name is Thoughty.
17:54
I hate you. Status newly awakened.
18:02
All right, active. Locking.
18:05
Locking in, I have a power type called shock and awe.
18:10
Physiological signature electrical buildup detected in
18:13
core musculature and upper chest.
18:16
You're making me read really big words here, man.
18:19
Chest. Source power appears to be still
18:22
at this store. Ambien static charge dirt and
18:26
combat tension discharge is instinctive but not
18:29
neurological. So it sounds like whenever I get
18:34
scared I shock people. Like a electric field of sorts.
18:40
More so if a melee attack is made on you, you automatically
18:43
have a counter attack that always hits.
18:47
OK OK let's say counter spell but cooler triggers
18:51
automatically when Thaudi is hit by a melee attack.
18:53
Hey, you just said that delivers a guaranteed counter attack.
18:55
Also something you said deals 1D four of electric damage.
18:59
Cool cool. Forces attacker to make a
19:02
Fortitude save DC-10 plus my Constitution modifier.
19:07
On fail attacker is staggered for.
19:08
One, not your Constitution modifier.
19:10
Sorry man, take that out. Oh, that is just their
19:13
Constitution modifier, not yours.
19:14
Sorry. OK, OK, On fail, attacker is
19:18
staggered for one round. Visually manifests as a
19:20
crackling burst of lightning from his fists or vest straps.
19:24
Usage usable once per session, rechargeable if the smoke
19:27
breaks. Short rest or a few beers long
19:29
rest. I like that.
19:35
Yeah, so for for this one, a short rest is a smoke break and
19:39
a long rest is a few BA's. Those were Thoughty's ideas, by
19:42
the way. Well, Smoke Break was Hazy's few
19:44
beers with Thoughty's. Recommendation Avoid using your
19:47
open electronics. Previous incident involved a
19:50
melted vending machine and three lost Kit Kats.
19:52
Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry about the Kit Kats guys.
19:56
You fucking should be. Terrible person and next is
19:59
pretty kitties. All right, it's an echo pulse.
20:04
Echo pulse radiates from the soul center.
20:07
Can be used once per session. Sends out a spectral.
20:12
Spectral. Is that right?
20:14
Spectral. Spiritual.
20:16
Spiritual. Sends out a.
20:21
Spherical spherical spiritual ray race resistance.
20:27
Resonance wave. Spiritual resonance wave.
20:30
Resonance. Recess.
20:35
Resuscitation. Dude, maybe we should hire a
20:39
teacher. Hip Hop Anonymous.
20:42
Things like get in here. Damn you, you give him all the
20:47
easy ones. Yeah, reveals a hidden or
20:51
ethereal entities residual spiritual trauma in it, embedded
20:58
in locations or beings recharges or how.
21:02
Do you like tank ethereal like that and then everything else?
21:06
I don't know. I don't know.
21:12
I've been drinking, man. Oh, there you go.
21:15
Bless his heart, he's trying. So basically he basically he can
21:21
either find a hidden supernatural being within 30
21:24
feet of him or he can if they're within 10 feet of him, he can
21:29
check out their past to see what it is they want.
21:31
Like basically check in for motive with them.
21:33
But he can only do it once per session or every smoke break or
21:37
a few beers. And he got that from the Bunny
21:40
man when he touched that tricycle that he shouldn't have
21:43
fucking touched. I was just trying to take it,
21:48
ma'am. I know you were next is hazing.
21:52
That's me. Power type Night Stalker
21:56
instinct signature retinal dilation and mild adrenaline
22:01
spike observed in low light conditions.
22:04
Origin Latent instinctual enhancement activated by
22:08
supernatural exposure effect. It grants dark vision up to 30
22:13
feet in total darkness. Provides a + 2 bonus to an
22:17
initiative when operating in darkness or nighttime
22:20
environments. Heightened awareness of spatial
22:23
threats and a low light scenarios.
22:27
And then recommendation would be stop saying I am the knight.
22:31
You are not Batman. I am Justice.
22:35
I am. Justice.
22:37
Yeah, there we go. There's there's the proper
22:39
response. All right, well, Baby Bird and I
22:43
weren't knocked unconscious, but I went ahead and I scanned us
22:46
just in case. So for me, Coyote, I already
22:50
have an act of power. It's the CEO de Fuego.
22:52
It's the thing I've been learning down in Tijuana.
22:54
It's ritual based. No mutation detected.
22:56
Spiritual resonance aligns with corundirismo traditions.
22:59
Ritual Details. It requires soot, ash, or sacred
23:02
oil performed with prayer and a drawn Pentagon surrounding a
23:07
flame symbol. That's what I put on Thaddi's
23:08
head for the Dark Watchers. The flame glows faintly on
23:11
weapon or item activation. Blesses one target, weapon or
23:14
person per mission. Adds +2 damage to all attacks
23:17
made with that weapon. It also becomes either fire or
23:20
radiant damage depending on the monster and what it's most
23:23
vulnerable to. Seal lasts for five attacks.
23:26
Each strike burns away one side of the Pentagon.
23:28
After the 5th use, the seal extinguishes and must be
23:30
reapplied in a new mission. Limitations can't be stacked or
23:34
placed on multiple items. As soon as I put on a new item,
23:37
the old one's gone and I can't use it on myself.
23:39
I can either use it on a weapon I'm using or on one of your guys
23:42
weapons or you specifically. The other thing I have the lava
23:47
telos Manos I'm still working. That kind of worked in the Dark
23:50
Watcher, but it's basically when I put Holy Soil on my hand or
23:55
Holy Ash and I light him on fire and I use that to melee radiant
24:01
beings kind of thing. And nothing's happened to Baby
24:03
Bird, but I went ahead and checked on him either and his
24:06
stuff is a little different. Subject Baby bird status No
24:10
supernatural traits detected. Bio Anomaly hosting an advanced,
24:15
highly uncomfortable tape for him.
24:23
Tapeworm, now also immune to bullets, has requested a protein
24:28
shake for Carl. Its name is Carl.
24:33
I guess so. Digestive system currently
24:35
processing 11,000 is digesting. 11,000 calories a day.
24:41
Is that why I'm shitting blood? Probably.
24:45
Medical extraction recommended or an exorcism?
24:48
Oh my God. For the record, Baby Bird didn't
24:51
know about this. It's really funny that he went
24:52
straight to the bathroom we got here.
24:59
A lot of coincidence. My butt hole is itchy.
25:03
Those are everyone's superpowers.
25:07
Oh no, the Roomba is back of the room.
25:08
All three of you make the luck roll.
25:12
What if I wanted to go off? Yeah, exactly about say the same
25:15
thing. Actual explosion happens.
25:18
And make it look. Make it look roll.
25:21
I got a 5. 16. Oh no, I got a 17 the only time
25:26
I didn't want to roll high. So you notice that there is
25:30
another claymore mine on here. It reloaded and it goes off
25:36
boom. This time, it's not a confetti
25:38
cannon. It couldn't be that cute twice.
25:43
I get it. Pretty Kitty takes 9 points of
25:45
damage. Jesus Christ and off the Roomba
25:49
goes Man starts cleaning up the skate park.
25:52
I like this Roomba. It's a surprise at the time.
25:56
My side. Somebody help Pretty Kitty up.
26:01
Kingsley comes out of nowhere. Yeah, but to say sounds like a
26:04
job for Kingsley. Mrs. Kitty Moist tell it.
26:09
Oh. A little bit dab you up so all.
26:15
Right, Kingsley. Kingsley takes pretty misses
26:18
Kitty to Oh, by the way, this this top corner here, this is
26:23
our bunk room where we sleep. It's called Beat and sleep, and
26:30
he's bandaging pretty Kitty up. All right, so all right, that's
26:35
cool. New powers everyone's got Carl
26:36
sounds nice. That's cool.
26:38
Did you guys just see that Butler Steel pretty Kitty?
26:43
Oh, it's fine. Is he a robot?
26:45
He lifted him with one arm. Kings.
26:48
He's like, smell nice. Yeah.
26:55
You can't help. You're tied up.
26:58
Yeah, I didn't hear anything. You're hanging upside down by
27:02
from the bunk while he's like fixing you up.
27:04
He's like hold my cross, hold my crossbow, boy.
27:10
Oh man, he's wild. We're just making the rounds.
27:17
Get him Roomba. That's going to that's going to
27:21
be the thumbnail for this. It's just a Roomba chasing all
27:24
of us. All right, so you guys got any
27:28
questions about the world or anything like that?
27:30
Like you got you got your powers activated.
27:32
That's pretty neat. How?
27:35
How big is the tapeworm? I want to.
27:37
Know where baby Bird got the tapeworm?
27:43
The tapeworm is 37 feet long. Jesus.
27:46
Yeah. From Gas Station Sushi.
27:49
I I recall trying to have sex with a monster at a lake.
27:54
It was from the Bear Lake monster in Utah for sure, which
27:59
for the listeners that episode will come out later once we
28:02
finish it. So that'll be a flashback with a
28:05
butcher Diddley, Diddley, Diddley Diddley before they had
28:07
powers. Good times, yeah.
28:11
Yeah, Hazy and the baby bird were not doing great against
28:14
this monster. Or too great and it, you know,
28:18
just went South. Yeah, so they.
28:21
Tried. I was getting somewhere.
28:23
Sure. I I read the room wrong?
28:31
You certainly did. You read the whole lake wrong.
28:35
Yeah, that, that happens a lot. Well, I'm going to go ahead and
28:42
strip down naked guys and get in this hot tub.
28:46
OK, you don't have any questions or anything hazy as you get in
28:48
this hot tub all? Right, I'll let y'all discuss
28:53
it. Talk about talk amongst
28:55
yourselves. The dude just starts undressing.
29:01
All right, I'm going to go fix my guns.
29:04
While you head down to what, the first work bench here, you start
29:06
fixing your gun. I want to go with this corner so
29:09
I can see Jeeves over there. You're.
29:13
Going to go to the beat and sleep and check on Kingsley.
29:15
All right. No, no, no.
29:17
I want to just get on that side of the tub so I can see them.
29:20
So all right, you just sit there.
29:22
Enjoy it. Like a freak.
29:25
Starts. I just made very I make eye
29:30
contact with you, Coyote very watch a sexual tension.
29:33
I'm like, So what do we do now? Hey bird, you need help with
29:40
that gun? I run away and I go to help baby
29:42
bird. Is there anything you want to
29:44
tell us? Don't leave me alone with Toddy.
29:47
I walk through the door right here.
29:49
I walk through the door right here to the left of me and I go,
29:52
Hey, why are you running baby? These videos have not gotten
29:56
enough likes for you to roll to seduce the game warden.
29:59
Not happening yet. OK.
30:03
But I'll keep it in mind. I'll keep it in mind.
30:05
Keep it in mind. Fucking right about it.
30:07
I'm getting naked in the tub. I run it.
30:10
Yeah. 66 feet apart, so we're not gay.
30:15
Well, you'll get naked with him, but you won't get naked with me.
30:18
What the fuck is this? Yes, I can overpower him.
30:24
Only because I let you. You're just scared of playing
30:27
with a little bear. Yeah, this Otter doesn't want
30:31
anything to do with you. Is there something you want to
30:36
tell us about the world right now that we're in I?
30:40
Mean, what do you guys know about the world so far?
30:43
I know that I am an unstoppable killer.
30:46
I know that it's full of monsters that need to be bred.
30:51
Whoa, no, no, this isn't the Lake Bear Monster all over
30:55
again. Oh.
30:58
I don't know man, Kingly's getting pretty close to me.
31:03
Kingsley's there to help you. Kingsley's a safe space as he
31:07
circles you in the bed. Whoa, he's circling his prey.
31:17
He's actually looking through the This is a window right here.
31:20
He's looking at Hazy and Coyote in the bath, just relaxing, just
31:24
staring intently. The glass is actually fogging
31:27
up, but not on the side that's the bath it's on.
31:29
It's on Kingsley's side because he's breathing too heavy.
31:34
I'm going to yell on ACE. Subscribe to my only fans.
31:37
Get the fuck out of here. I knew when you said that you 2
31:41
are good at keeping secrets that you guys slept together.
31:43
I knew it. We didn't sleep together.
31:49
Who could sleep, you know? Boys, I just to serve.
31:55
I just received confirmation that coyotes in the twinks.
31:59
What I do, a bungalow in the Bahamas, is my business.
32:03
That's a twinkly Butler we got there.
32:06
And look at my toe token. I'm pretty twinkish looking.
32:11
Yeah, you are, but. But you make saving throws or
32:16
look checks. Shit. 1615 will will you save me
32:26
if it comes into here because I'm pretty much.
32:30
Dead. Sure.
32:33
It comes in here and Kingsley just takes his foot and it turns
32:35
him around. Burn.
32:36
He goes out the room. How did he not set off the mine?
32:40
Did it not reload? Oh, it's reloaded.
32:43
Kingsley's a professional Butler, my guy.
32:48
The things he could do with his feet looking.
32:52
Whoa, can you tell me about the the veil this company used to
32:59
work for? Absolutely.
33:02
The veil sucks. Oh shit.
33:06
Is that it? No, they're a publicly known
33:11
company. But think of them like this
33:13
world's Blackwater mercenaries. Posing as a private security
33:18
firm, the government contracts them for covert, off the books
33:22
operations. Lately, they've shifted focus to
33:25
capturing monsters and urban legends, turning them into
33:28
weapons to control the world through supernatural means and
33:32
by manipulating people's faiths. Are they mating?
33:37
Are they mating with the monsters?
33:40
I don't know about that. I I I didn't look into Project
33:44
Lovefest, I left. Thought that was a bit weird for
33:47
me. So you said they're a public
33:51
company? They're a public company.
33:54
So theoretically we could theoretically we could short
33:58
their stock and we can end this whole campaign without ever
34:01
fighting them. I like that idea.
34:05
Yeah, try that. You're going to end up like
34:07
Diddy, yo. Oh.
34:10
Won't be a bad day for you. I have nowhere near enough baby
34:14
oil for that. I know.
34:19
So that's what the veil is. And so I put together this group
34:22
in this bunker among other bunkers.
34:24
I've got a little bit of money because I sold my stock of the
34:27
Vale. So that's how I'm funding this
34:29
that. And I got a lot of friends
34:30
helping out here and there. Like Kingsley, he works for very
34:34
cheap. Is Kingsley a human?
34:38
Shut up, pretty Kitty. God damn it.
34:42
I'm just curious man. Pretty Kitty that was supposed
34:46
to be like next season shit. Wait a minute.
34:53
I don't know man. I'll tell you what Pretty Kitty
34:55
questions. Pretty Kitty, Give me a luck
34:56
check. What 19?
35:02
It's it's opposite day. Nobody sees this pretty Kitty,
35:06
however, as Kingsley is starting to walk away.
35:08
He thought he was out of sight from you, but he wasn't and you
35:12
just see his form waver and just to a cloud of smoke.
35:21
OK. I'm going to stay in the bed.
35:28
I'm freaking out kind of mentally, just in my head.
35:33
So it cuts back to Coyote and Hazy in the bath and I just say
35:37
Hadron Collider. I hardly know her and Hazy says
35:41
stop doing these sitcom jokes with me.
35:46
I'm going to get up and do some naked bench presses.
35:49
Oh fuck yeah, I'm going to get up and do naked yoga.
35:54
God, I'm going to do downer facing dog right here.
35:57
Oh, we got to do luck checks. Oh fuck.
36:02
Oh no, I'm going to not lie and say I didn't.
36:07
Well, I did just roll A1. I rolled A1 roll again.
36:12
You rolled over then I I'm not 20.
36:16
What the fuck? Me too.
36:17
Roll again. And I got 4.
36:20
Oh, you got a four that time? Oh, yeah, I got a 20.
36:24
Good. Anyways, this cannon goes off
36:28
and just shoots Katie at you. What is this?
36:32
It's like a pinata. You take 3 points of damage.
36:34
Hazy. Dammit.
36:37
High velocity candy. You've actually got a Jolly
36:42
Rancher shoved near your cheek right now.
36:46
I love this fucking Roomba man. This Roomba is amazing.
36:51
Oh my God, I get sick of this and I walk back over here and I
36:53
hit the Roomba trap and then the Roomba goes back into its hole.
36:58
What if I don't want him to leave?
37:00
They go activate the trap, asshole.
37:03
OK, I go activate the trap. Oh my God, give me a look.
37:06
Check. 13. Nothing happens, you just hear a
37:11
click and you hear something start to hiss in some room
37:15
somewhere. I step off the trap and I step
37:20
back on it. Nothing happens, but you still
37:28
hear a hiss. OK, well I'm going to go to the
37:34
bar and get ready to pour drinks I guess.
37:38
Yeah. Transmission loss.
37:48
Teen status unknown.