Latest / Rabbi Moshe Haber - Daily Mussar/Weekly Perasha / Rabbi Moshe Haber Path of the Just-Importance of Pure Motives in Community Contributions 8.13.25
Transcript
- 0:00The title is tawarah, which means a person doing things for
- 0:05the right motive, at least partially.
- 0:07We have all kinds of doing things of schma, doing good
- 0:11things with the right mindset. We're trying to show us that
- 0:13even though people do many good things, blended into our mind
- 0:18and into our drive, often times are other motives, which is fine
- 0:24as long as there are bad motives, which is actually
- 0:27terrible. We explained the last couple of
- 0:29days, although it's fine, really all Hashem cares about is the
- 0:33real motive. So Hashem wants a real motive
- 0:35and that's the part that matters.
- 0:36So it may be fine they have other motives, but that doesn't
- 0:39really, although it doesn't really carry much weight.
- 0:42Point M1 And M2, which I think is a very important point, is
- 0:46that although it's OK to have ulterior motives and we have to
- 0:48be real with ourselves and say everything we do has some other
- 0:52motives, that's what it is. I don't care if it's someone
- 0:54building an institution, someone becoming building a new school
- 0:58or someone becoming a rabbi, someone going to class, someone
- 1:01doing this, There's all sorts of motives.
- 1:04The reality is, is that all these different actions and good
- 1:08ones have the power to develop us, to make us the better
- 1:12people. But the part that's going to
- 1:14make us into a better person is the part that we do for the
- 1:18right reason, which is if I, let's say, go to class because I
- 1:23want people to say I go to class, that drive and that
- 1:26motive, it might get me there, but that won't build me.
- 1:30The only part that will build me would it be the part that
- 1:31actually enjoy it or I do it for its sake.
- 1:35I do it for that reason. That part will change me.
- 1:38What I was about to change you, that part of it will change you.
- 1:41The same thing is true with Hassan.
- 1:43If I give charity and I do so because I want people to know
- 1:47I'm, you know, big time guy in the community, I'm doing
- 1:50charity, I get the reward. That's the side.
- 1:53A part of me wants to help people as well.
- 1:54The part that wants to help people, that part, if you can
- 1:58divide that up that element and that degree will help you become
- 2:01a better person. But the part that you focused on
- 2:04some side not good motive or definitely not productive
- 2:08motive, it will not change because in fact you find the
- 2:11people, you can't really explain this, but people have other
- 2:15drives in these good areas that actually are not just not really
- 2:18productive to the opposite. And you say what kind of blend
- 2:21is this? There's good and then there's
- 2:22bad mixed inside. And then as a shem have such a
- 2:25world while Hashem runs the world that way.
- 2:26That's for starters, we said on Sunday already Hashem has the
- 2:29world go around based on giving people other reasons of doing so
- 2:34just to get the world going right.
- 2:36Can imagine a guy who builds an institution and the reason he
- 2:39does so is solely because he wants to be president.
- 2:43OK, now he does that for that reason.
- 2:46Hashem did that. Hashem wants that institution to
- 2:49be strong, so that's society. And for that man, it's not going
- 2:52to make him. It's not going to build him.
- 2:54What's going to build him is the part where he says to himself, I
- 2:57care about the kids or I care about our community.
- 2:59That part and amount of building, that's the tower, the
- 3:03purity in there, that will probably would be real.
- 3:06He compares the two and can compare it to fine flour,
- 3:10compare it to pure gold, all those things.
- 3:12The part that's pure is the part that's real, and that's the part
- 3:16that will have an impact back on him.
- 3:19Now for Hashem's result, everything you put into that is
- 3:22going to help for His result, for His own sake.
- 3:25Only the part that's pure is going to build.
- 3:28That's the minds, right? That's what He says and he says,
- 3:31and a person needs to remind themselves all the time, Ahmana
- 3:34Ali Baba, Hashem wants your heart.
- 3:37All Hashem cares about is your effort, your mind's effort, not
- 3:43the action or definitely not the result.
- 3:49Kien da la Don by the Houma singer badam shiyu maze mitzvah
- 3:54Hashem. It's not enough for God our
- 3:56actions to be actions of mitzvah.
- 3:58Ella haikara levana shall live ETA horde le havin by la Buda
- 4:04amitit. The core most important thing is
- 4:08how pure is your mind. You can have a person who
- 4:12doesn't do something great because she doesn't want her,
- 4:16another person. And someone says, I understand
- 4:19you're being sensitive and caring, but you know, there's a
- 4:24lot of whatever that can be built if you just do that, OK,
- 4:27it's another person. It's one person.
- 4:29There's so much Torah that can be built.
- 4:32There's so much good that can happen if you just go ahead with
- 4:36that project, right? And the person says, I know it's
- 4:39wrong. I won't do it.
- 4:41Now there's two points to that. One is that God will definitely
- 4:45get the job done the right way, that's for sure.
- 4:49Two, Hashem cares more about the Libah, but the purity of mine
- 4:54and that person, yes, so. Your kidneys.
- 4:59Hashem Chaxi kidneys, Hashem Chaxi heart, and that means
- 5:02Hashem Chaxi inside looks at your reasoning.
- 5:04He looks at what's inside of you.
- 5:05He does not even a results matter.
- 5:08And this business results mean nothing.
- 5:12It's a process that's way more important than the result.
- 5:16Someone does something that's inappropriate or something
- 5:18wrong, something that hurts another person, and he's
- 5:21building and building and building and he say, wow, he
- 5:23can't be stopped. Oh, he's such a builder.
- 5:27You know what? There's people who have
- 5:28collateral damage, people who lost their job, people who got
- 5:31hurt, people who were talented, people who were not really
- 5:33getting the recognition, whatever may be.
- 5:36He does that and you're looking at him and saying, wow, there's
- 5:39no wow. According to the Torah,
- 5:41according to Hashem, there's no wow.
- 5:43They might be wow the result for the sake of other people, but
- 5:47for the sake of him. I'm not saying you won't get
- 5:49reward, but what God wants is a purity of mind.
- 5:53And God would rather have someone turn down a big
- 5:57opportunity and a big process, big project, turn it down if
- 6:03he's going to hurt another person.
- 6:06And then rather than do that project and officially build the
- 6:10world, I see Riley turn it down. It's hard to say and it's very
- 6:14hard to live by because nobody ever knows.
- 6:17Well, how do you make the decision?
- 6:18Maybe it's worth it. Maybe the other side is being
- 6:20too sensitive. You know, you have to figure it
- 6:22out. But you do have to keep in mind,
- 6:25and God's eyes, He's not seeing the big project.
- 6:27He's seeing the purity of mind I've already seen.
- 6:29That should always be our biggest strife, you know, And
- 6:32I'll tell you how this can go off the rails.
- 6:36If someone would utilize the other minds, which would say
- 6:38building is the most important thing, you know, what can
- 6:42happen. What can happen is a guy might,
- 6:48a guy might not be so honest in business.
- 6:49Same mindset. I'll be so honest in business.
- 6:52Why I give a lot of charity After that, it's riding on my
- 6:56shoulders. It's not ridiculous, right?
- 6:58But the truth is, if you go down that road of thinking about
- 7:01results, result, results, person can end up in that, that pro,
- 7:06that world. He can start in a world which is
- 7:08not so bad, which is I'm just going to start that project and
- 7:11just, you know, sideswipe a couple of people for the sake of
- 7:15building the community. And he can end up in a world
- 7:18where he's dishonest in business again, for the sake of building
- 7:22the community. That's how it works.
- 7:23If you lose your focus of your mind and the purity of mind, who
- 7:28knows where it can go? It's how it works when it comes
- 7:31to community projects. You hear me?
- 7:32This is on the recording, right? Yeah.
- 7:34I, I, I would ask you the question if a person has like a,
- 7:38a business that might not be so pure and he gives a lot of said
- 7:44that. The discussion comes up all the
- 7:45time. And then the question becomes.
- 7:48Is the constant, Yeah. So now the truth is I don't, I'm
- 7:50not going to judge. I said before I don't judge his
- 7:53businesses as much as I used to, partially because I don't
- 7:57really. Some of them do on the up and
- 7:59up, some of them don't. Yeah, but the person getting the
- 8:01money will never, ever get out of it.
- 8:04That's sure. It's hard to get at such a
- 8:06thing. The money keeps.
- 8:11Coming in How? Can he get out of it?
- 8:16The mind or the heart is really the king of our entire body?
- 8:25And if the heart and the mine combined are not serving Hashim
- 8:32and Abu dhat sharp havarim cum, the service of the rest of our
- 8:38limbs are worthless. They pay to carry.
- 8:41No way. That's only where the mine wants
- 8:48to go. Whereas everybody is going to
- 8:54go. My child, they give your heart
- 8:56to me. All Hashem wants to know is how.
- 8:59That's the key and that's the goal and that's towered out.
- 9:01Is this a high level? Yes, but it is absolutely
- 9:05something that has to be front center of every one of your
- 9:09decisions and your thoughts. I remember my father, I say this
- 9:12whole time they were conversations about different
- 9:15things in the shoe a building bake and he used to tell me on
- 9:19the side. They say it wasn't only to me,
- 9:22but I'll say it was to me. Say Moshe, you want to build.
- 9:26He gave me a name of you choose the committee.
- 9:28You want to build, you choose in the community.
- 9:30We can do that. We can do that.
- 9:33That's not our goal. He's dumb and it's not our goal.
- 9:37Our goal is something else. Our goal is to build people,
- 9:40build families. There's no purpose.
- 9:42You tell me that shows are great.
- 9:44Please tell me all the time you want to build, you choose.
- 9:47You use the name, the names. We can do that.
- 9:50That's not our goal. So the point is, and that's just
- 9:52the point is you have to figure out your motive, your drive,
- 9:57your mindset. And I'll tell you what happens.
- 9:59The more your motive is clear, the much it's it's so much
- 10:03easier in life to get out of the fog and the forest of so many
- 10:08things, which means a lot of times people make decisions
- 10:11because they want big time success and they want to be very
- 10:16well known. Someone has something you can
- 10:19say or not say. Yeah, you know, in the news
- 10:22someone says a hot bar item, people talk and they were
- 10:26carriers weight. Maybe it's not the right thing
- 10:27to say. Maybe.
- 10:29But you know, you you attempt it because it's in the Carolina way
- 10:32to be front page. It'll be a big deal.
- 10:34You say it. That's the wrong motive.
- 10:37I mean, you're driven to make the papers, right?
- 10:39Wrong motive will bring a person to do the wrong thing.
- 10:43Now you get even finer. Here's a person within total and
- 10:46it's what's in doing good deeds, his own, you know, toward the
- 10:50community and his own personal life and your own personal life.
- 10:54You can build yourself in a way that's developing and building
- 10:57or you can build yourself in a way that has other motives in
- 11:00mind, whatever it may be. You pray in a certain shoe so
- 11:04people see you so you're more well known you, I don't know,
- 11:09like we always mentioned, keep more public charity.
- 11:12People know your name, right? You do certain things that make
- 11:16you more out there. If you have that opportunity.
- 11:18The motive is off and the driver is wrong and that has not the
- 11:23best result. And his point is just try to
- 11:27think clearly, think about the purpose.
- 11:31So if I don't give you an issue, this guy, Andrew Carnegie, OK,
- 11:34so he's one of the wealthiest steel manners in the world, and
- 11:38he treated his workers terribly and he fought the unions and all
- 11:42that. And he said he goes, look, I'm
- 11:44going to give all my money to charity.
- 11:46These workers, they're just going to go out and drink and do
- 11:48whatever they're going to do. They're going to waste the
- 11:50money. I'm going to preserve the money.
- 11:51I'm giving it to charity. So he treated his work as
- 11:54terribly, but gave all his money in charity that that's so his
- 11:57motive was positive. That's off but but.
- 12:00But that's off because he's getting to the second step.
- 12:02See, sometimes you have that which is even.
- 12:04Let's say that's what we got over to to Jewish world.
- 12:07Even when it comes to results, our results are not my own ego.
- 12:11Our results ought to build. What Guy says I want to build
- 12:16the community, I don't know this SBH, I want to make my own
- 12:21thing. I'm rather huge and I'm going to
- 12:22do it better. I just said they're amazing
- 12:24organization. I'm going to do it my own way.
- 12:26I have a few things I can change.
- 12:27I'm going to do it better. And the process, your goal is to
- 12:32build a hero and the process, there's people who have invested
- 12:36their life, there is so many volunteers, there's so many
- 12:39people who are committed, there's so many people who are
- 12:41linked to the organization already.
- 12:43And all that's going to be sideswiped because you can do it
- 12:46better. Again, the goal might be even Le
- 12:50schma in a sense, second layer le schma, but it's still off.
- 12:53Now you have to figure out it's one of the hardest things.
- 12:56Figure out you can't be too soft in this area because then
- 13:01nothing will ever get done. There's always someone who's
- 13:03going to get hurt. It's one of the hardest things
- 13:05to figure out. When is competition appropriate?
- 13:08When is it not appropriate? When is building the right thing
- 13:11is not the right thing? Schools, every single one of
- 13:13them anyway. School that has a challenge,
- 13:15it's because of another school, right?
- 13:17It's also because of the first school's weaknesses.
- 13:19How do you decide? I see a school, they have a
- 13:21weakness. I want to build another school
- 13:23that's better. I build that school.
- 13:25The first school that has that weakness will be highlighted and
- 13:30it will crumble or at least be tested very soon.
- 13:35And we've seen the time and time again in the community.
- 13:37I don't have the shoulders to make the decision personally,
- 13:40but these people did. And the question is, how do you
- 13:42know when it's right, when it's wrong?
- 13:44Well, you have to think and rethink about your motive.
- 13:47The most classic example of this topic goes back to 100 years or
- 13:51so is the originally yeshiva. They always talk about the Shiva
- 13:54religion in Europe, Originally Shiva.
- 13:57The reason it's a good story because there's a Rabbi Loudon
- 14:00model. He worked it out.
- 14:02He worked out the Shiva model in his mind and a perfect model,
- 14:07the structure, even wrote a book on it, the whole thing.
- 14:11And he went to his teacher that would not go on and he told them
- 14:13I want to make a Shiva and they got on the gun and said no this.
- 14:17Is Rabbi Slanter. This is Rabbi Velocity.
- 14:22He said they are going to the He said no.
- 14:25He came back five years later and he said, I still want to do
- 14:28it. And they got on the and I said
- 14:30yes, go ahead with it. And he built it.
- 14:33And he built, like I said, the most successful, which is what
- 14:36change always everyone it's got would change.
- 14:38And he said it. Either he said it or the Rabbi
- 14:40understood. He said originally you came
- 14:43back, he was too excited. You're too excited.
- 14:46There might be some selfish motives, and this is something
- 14:49that I struggle with personal all the time, which is how do
- 14:51you decide when you're doing something that's right or you're
- 14:54doing something for competitive reasons?
- 14:55You're doing something because you're afraid something else is
- 14:57going to come up that's bigger and better.
- 14:59How do you decide? You have to work this through.
- 15:02It's such a challenging challenge when you're in
- 15:05community service. You have to work this through.
- 15:07Try to figure out when you're genuine and when you're not.
- 15:11And in reality, in the morning, you have to accept the fact that
- 15:13probably never, probably never full of le schma.
- 15:19No shock. There's too much publicity,
- 15:22there's too much talk, there's too much notoriety in the
- 15:25community today to really be le schma.
- 15:28You can't. You can't be spoken about all
- 15:31the time and then tell yourself, I don't care if people say it's
- 15:34impossible. It's not physically possible.
- 15:37But like I said all week, you have to find a zone.
- 15:40If you're in big service, you have to find a zone where nobody
- 15:44knows what you do. You have to do charity that's
- 15:47partially unknown. You have to do Torah.
- 15:49That's some unknown you have to do that's not known.
- 15:54I'll give you an example as well.
- 15:56If a rabbi or for a community leader is very nice person, love
- 16:01dafkas not guaranteed. He's a very nice person.
- 16:05He seems like we're an nice guy. He's soft, he's kind, he's
- 16:08caring. He's not proven to be a nice
- 16:10guy. How do you find that?
- 16:11If he's a nice guy, and this is a strong point, but I've seen it
- 16:14personally, you find that if he's a nice guy, if he treats
- 16:18the person who's not a donor to his institution, who's not well
- 16:22off, not a famous name, if he treats him properly.
- 16:27I'm not saying you choose him equal because there is an area
- 16:30which is you do have to be and this is not called, you know,
- 16:34whatever they want to use the word, use those words.
- 16:37You know, when you would you're very good to it.
- 16:39You're not very nice to a donor. It might be partially as
- 16:42borderline Hakurat the top there too.
- 16:44This guy who out of his way, they give you a lot of money and
- 16:47he holds up the institution he deserves Hakurat the top.
- 16:49There's no question about that. But at the same time, if he's
- 16:53not nice, the leader and he's sort of, I'd say the scar is not
- 17:00really involved, not really caring about someone, not a big
- 17:02donor, that's an indication that he may not be a nice guy.
- 17:07He might seem like the kindest person around, but look what
- 17:10he's going to, You know what he's doing.
- 17:12If someone's only kind to people who are up by them, the kindness
- 17:16is right now not proven to be real.
- 17:20They need to be kind across the board.
- 17:22Again, that's an indication of your little schma element.
- 17:25And all these things are things you have to think about and
- 17:27rethink and rethink and make sure that even though you're
- 17:30doing good, you're actually doing good for good sake.
- 17:34And this is something that a person, I'm telling you
- 17:37personally can easily lose track of.
- 17:41I mean, you can easily find out I went into this for the good
- 17:45reason, but somehow I ended up all I'm doing all day is dealing
- 17:49with the well off, all I'm doing all day.
- 17:52It's nice to the guy who can help me back.
- 17:54That's called being smart, love. Dafka is a really nice.
- 17:59Nice means you're actually a caring person across the board.
- 18:02And that's the same requirement of the SHMA.
- 18:04The SHMA means genuine. The SHMA means real.
- 18:07The SHMA means you are the same to everybody.
- 18:10That's what the SHMA means. I'm gonna start with this.