Latest / Finding New Waters / Exploring the Path to Recovery with Momentum Recovery's Rick Barney | Finding New Waters

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Exploring the Path to Recovery with Momentum Recovery's Rick Barney | Finding New Waters · Finding New Waters

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  We get into recovery, right and, and, and we're expecting
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  everyone to have either because it's what we've learned through
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  through childhood or what we've been around.
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  We're expecting that everyone have these big reactions right
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  to, to whether we're succeeding or failing what whatever end of
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  the spectrum, we're residing on a given moment, right?
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  Like we're, we're anticipating these big loud reactions
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  sometimes, right? And, and the more we can just
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  kind of normalize and experience like, yeah, that sucks.
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  And like, I think that's probably happened to most of us,
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  you know, and like and like help people walk through that and,
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  and become to feel a little bit safer saying what's really going
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  on, a little more comfortable telling people, telling people
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  what's happening in their life. All right.
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  Welcome back everybody to another episode of Finding New
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  Waters. My name is Bea Reeves.
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  I'm the Director of Business Development here at New Waters
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  Recovery in Raleigh. Sitting here with our CEO,
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  Justin McClendon and our very special guest today is our buddy
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  and colleague and sort of a neighbor down in Wilmington at
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  Momentum Recovery, the Co founder and co-owner of Momentum
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  Recovery, Mr. Rick Barney. Welcome, Rick.
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  Thank you. Thank you guys for having me.
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  Thanks, B Hey, Justin, it's good to see you.
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  Guys, thanks for coming on. Yeah, this is.
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  Long overdue. Yeah.
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  Yeah. So where are you right now?
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  I'm actually, so I've got this thing I'm doing obsessively.
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  I'm learning to fly airplanes, so I'm at a flight.
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  School. That's awesome.
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  At the moment up up in the Asheville area, so.
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  Oh, cool, Very cool. Yeah.
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  Like I had a thing booked with them at noon and I thought this
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  was at 10, then turns out it was at 11.
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  So I was like, I'm gonna just do it from their office, so.
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  OK, cool. Well, that's the beauty of being
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  able to do this remotely. There you go.
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  And I mean, you know, go ahead. And I mean, kind of unrelated to
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  recovery, but not entirely, right?
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  Like it's been this kind of thing I've been geeking out on
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  for the last year like this, this, this whole process.
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  So like learning to fly in the airplane, right?
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  Like it's really like I tend to do.
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  I've become quite obsessed with and like, and that's where I'm
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  spending my free time a lot these days, so.
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  That's cool, man. What are the chances you would
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  be in flight school if you hadn't found recovery?
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  00 even as is right, like almost 20 years sober.
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  It's the, the medical process, like, so there's this really
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  extensive kind of medical review process you have to do in order
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  to be able to fly. So I had to jump through all of
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  these hoops, man, to include like forensic psychologist
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  assessments and all of these things because I even have like
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  huge piece in my history. So it was a, it was a pretty big
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  hill to climb and, and required a little bit of tenacity to get
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  through, you know, but yeah, 00 percent chance to answer your
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  question. And if it was, it would be, it
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  would be dangerous for everyone involved.
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  So. Right.
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  Well, man, that's super cool. You know, and I, you know, I've
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  known you now for five or six years and one of the first
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  things I just noticed about you is you just one of these people
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  who really loves living life in recovery.
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  And you, you know, I see, you know, you, you're a surfer and
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  you're a traveller and you know it.
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  Just such a great example of somebody who I don't want to put
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  words in your mouth from what I see, somebody who did not get
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  sober to sit on his hands. Yeah, man, I think that's a
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  really important that whole like, you know, we're not a glum
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  lot piece, right? Like I think that's a that's an
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  important piece of what we're doing.
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  And you know, what large part of I see is kind of my personal
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  mission is helping other people understand that recovery is not
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  this death sentence, right? It's not this, it, it's not this
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  kind of acceptance that life is just going to be dull and boring
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  and, and uneventful, right? And I think the opposite's
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  actually true. We have the, we have so much
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  more ability to go out, do cool stuff and have fun and and be
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  engaged in life, right. And I think that's, I mean, as
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  you just said, I think that's a really important lesson for
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  people to learn. I think that's a huge, hugely
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  common fear for individuals. Just, you know, exactly that
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  like, well, how do I live life? And like, what does this even
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  look like, you know, without, without drugs and alcohol in my
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  life. And also learning that lesson of
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  like, what do we do? What does life look like?
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  What does fun feel like really important.
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  And I'm, I'm, I'm trying to refrain from immediately jumping
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  into momentum of what you guys do because I feel like that is a
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  big cornerstone to what you guys are offering, right?
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  Yeah, it, it is, it's huge, man. And like to your point, like I
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  remember, I remember starting to try to get sober around 1819
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  years old, right at at which point my entire world is didn't
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  have the awareness of this at the time, right.
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  But my entire world has become centered around drug or alcohol
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  in some form, right? Like the, you know, but it's
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  like my entire social connection to the world around me.
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  It's, it's my, my only release valve for, for recreational
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  purposes, right? A smiling mechanism for dealing
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  with stress, all of these things.
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  And we see these, you know, and, and, and I've worked kind of
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  exclusively, almost exclusively with young adults professionally
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  since. And, and we see so many kids
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  come in that are kind of like call them kids, young adults,
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  whatever, that are kind of in that boat, right?
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  They've they've built their entire their lifestyle and, and
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  their social network and everything around around
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  partying in some way, shape or form, right?
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  Or, or depending on where it's progressed to kind of using in a
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  dark room alone some version of that, right?
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  Like the every their whole whole structure, whole world's built
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  around that. And so the process of beginning
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  to unravel that like has to involve this awareness that that
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  life can be better, right? And and that it and that it can
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  still be fun and enjoyable and even more so.
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  And so, yeah, that is a large part of what we do is try to
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  expose people to that reality, right?
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  You know, and one of the, one of the shortcomings of, of
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  treatment in a lot of ways in my, in my view is, and, and this
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  has faded a lot, right? But this kind of old school
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  thought that, that you can't help somebody until they want to
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  change or, or that, that the, the professionals involved in a
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  case shouldn't be working harder than the individual coming into
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  treatment or whatever, right? And I, and I think that's to me,
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  that's, that's kind of distorted thinking a little bit, right?
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  Like we're working with a population that doesn't know
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  that there's a different way, right?
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  Like they don't know what they don't know.
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  Like there's no recognition. You can tell them that there's a
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  better life on the other side of this thing.
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  And that's just words, right? Because there's, there's no
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  frame of reference. So I, I think it is our job in
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  the early stages to, to really, if necessary, work a little bit
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  harder than them to demonstrate that, right?
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  Like, I know that you don't know this thing exists and let me
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  show you a little piece of it, right?
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  So I think that's a really important thing.
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  The treatment's gotten a lot better about over the last 20
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  years, right? But but when I was, when I was
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  young, I don't remember that really existing, you know well.
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  I that's something I was going to comment is you, you know, you
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  had momentum do such a great job of not wagging a finger and just
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  saying it's better on the other side.
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  Do these things you show them, you know, whether it's you and
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  Gabby and or, you know, Carson, like, I mean, people who are
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  somewhat still young in recovery and, and living these amazing
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  lives, or you, who, you know, got sober young.
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  And, and because, you know, I kind of I got sober at 41.
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  So I was kind of like in the middle, you know, when I was in
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  treatment, it never occurred to me that like I was with older,
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  younger people, because you know, my, my next door neighbor
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  was like, there were two guys next to me.
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  One guy was 18, one guy was 69. So it was just didn't have that
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  feel of what I'm in the wrong age group.
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  But you know, once I, you know, got had been sober a little
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  while I started work in the field.
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  There was this kind of, you know what, what, what does it mean to
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  be sober young, you know, and but what, but while I was
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  sitting in there, you know, I, I had what I, you know, like a
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  full on upheaval, spiritual experience and was like, Oh my
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  God, I'm so on fire for recovery.
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  I can't wait to be sober and, you know, get everybody else
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  sober. The the whole pink cloud, just
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  zealot guy. And then I remember sitting in
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  the kind of, you know, the like the living room TV area of the
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  treatment center where the treatment center and all of a
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  sudden just totally overcome by fear.
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  How? Wait a minute, wait a minute.
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  How am I ever going to go to a party, a wedding, a football
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  game, a concert, a date, a comedy show, have sex, go to New
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  York, go to New Orleans, go to Europe?
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  How can I do that sober? How can I, how am I possibly
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  going to do that and enjoy it? Then fortunately I, I just sat
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  on that for about 30 seconds and then I was like, wait a minute,
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  how did I do that before? If, if I didn't have all that
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  stuff completely lined up, then I was, I was miserable that, and
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  that was the prison. And so since then, you know,
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  I've done literally everything on that list, you know, and it's
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  always better, you know, everything is better.
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  And it's so hard And it, I, I'm not going to say hard for me.
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  It's impossible to try to explain that to somebody.
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  I just have to do it myself and, and kind of help people,
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  encourage them to give it just enough effort to start getting,
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  getting some results and start feeling it for themselves.
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  And that's what you all do so well down there.
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  Thanks, man, I appreciate that. And and all of that stuff you
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  mentioned, right. I think that's the stuff that
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  all of us kind of there's this kind of the earliest
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  reservations, right? Like when we're, when we're kind
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  of just starting to turn a corner, there are those things
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  that start coming up and, and they seem like these big, big
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  barriers that are impossible to get through.
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  And like the wedding stuff, like we, we deal with that a lot
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  with, with clients and their, their siblings or whomever.
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  And, and the thing that I'm big on that you mentioned is kind of
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  the, the romantic relationships, the sex thing, right?
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  Like it at a, you're talking to a 2020 year old, 22 year old
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  that's trying to get sober, right?
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  Like that's such a big part of their life and developmentally
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  appropriately so right. Like it's, it's just really,
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  really daunting things. And then you start talking about
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  adding the mental health medications and stuff on top of
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  that and like the way that that impacts stuff, right?
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  But like, it's such, just such a big scary thing to walk through
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  that I think it's diminished a lot of times And, and you know,
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  like the practical application of those things, right.
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  And, and, and one of the things that we don't, we try to stay
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  really far away from. I won't say we don't on
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  occasion, but on occasion it's appropriate.
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  But, but generally we won't like ban people from engaging in
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  romantic relationships, right? Like certainly not in primary
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  treatment on the front end. There's not the opportunity for
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  that. But in later phases of our
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  program, like very, very rarely, unless there's kind of a, a sex
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  and love addiction issue or something else we're working on
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  separately. Are we going to tell somebody
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  like you're not allowed to engage in romantic relationships
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  while you're here? One, it's just going to give
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  them an opportunity to see this lie to us.
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  But two, like if you're not going to get the practice within
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  this container where there is some kind of supervision and
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  some kind of some kind of outside modulation and this
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  ability to to bounce things off of a therapist or a case manager
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  or recovery coach or whomever it is you find yourself trusting
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  the most, right? Like, why would we not want you
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  to get that practice here? Don't get me wrong, we're not
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  encouraging people like day one out of residential to go like
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  hook up with somebody and get into some kind of romantic
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  relationship, but it's going to happen, right?
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  And, and so we can either like do the finger wagging thing and
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  like no relationships for 12 months or whatever, or it can be
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  like, Hey, I hear this is important to you and it's
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  probably something you're going to do whether I sign off on it
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  or not. So let's talk about some things
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  that you might need to be on, be on guard for like what, what
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  could potentially pose a danger to your situation And then like
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  allow them to have that experience and then come back
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  and be like, Hey, what went well?
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  What went wrong? Like what, what, what do you
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  want to do, do different next time?
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  You know, like, I think for, you know, I tell clients this all
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  the time, like I see treatment, especially long term treatment
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  like we do is, is this opportunity to run a lot of
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  experiments, right? Like let me try this thing on
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  and see how it goes, right. And, and, and our job is
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  certainly to protect people from kind of catastrophic failure
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  there, but like also to allow, allow space for trying different
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  ways of being in the world, whether that's kind of romantic
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  relationships or other kind of interpersonal skills we're
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  working on developing or whatever it is like to allow
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  that that room for safe exploration, you know?
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  Yeah. I mean, having that community,
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  not only hopefully they have a sponsor involved who is also
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  giving them maybe more direction that you don't, shouldn't do and
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  have chosen not to, which I think is wise.
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  But then they not only have hopefully a recovery community
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  that they've developed in Wilmington, but then they have
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  this group of guys or in the in the Cove in the women's program,
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  a group of women. So when that person does maybe
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  even buck the suggestion of a sponsor, but goes out and gets
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  involved in a relationship and it doesn't work out or or it's
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  going great either way. But they have this with these
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  raw emotions that they haven't ever felt sober.
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  And they're also young adults with a not even a fully formed
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  brain to have that sort of soft landing when things, you know,
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  let's be out most of the time it's they need that when it
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  doesn't go well, you know, and just to all and be able to kind
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  of fail in in kind of a, you know, a padded room, so to
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  speak. So they're not, you know,
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  they're not sitting in their own apartment after, you know,
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  somebody doesn't respond to their texts or gets, you know,
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  ghosted. You know what the first you
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  know, for me, I mean I know what my my instinct and knee jerk
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  reaction will be is to, you know, change the way I feel with
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  drugs and alcohol. So absolutely the first what
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  just came up when you were saying that is that that kind of
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  village or that community that, that, that we I think we all
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  need, right, Especially those individuals that are, that are
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  budding adults that have spent so much time, you know, not
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  feeling their emotions or experiencing life.
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  But I think all budding adults need that community, right?
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  Whether that's our family or whoever, you know, around them
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  to yeah, when they when they try a new thing and it doesn't work
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  out or if they're trying a new thing and it is working out,
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  just to be able to get some mentorship and some guidance.
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  I mean, like God, that's so crucially important for.
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  Sure. And I think and to your point at
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  at all life stages, right, like I'm, I'm in a disaster without
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  those things, you know, like I've got to have those people in
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  my life now. I'm I'm absolutely certain you
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  guys do too, right? Like the, it's so hard early in
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  recovery, though, when like there's this generally speaking,
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  there's this undercurrent of distrust or fear of
• 16:24
  vulnerability or, or, or whatever it is, right?
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  Like for somebody that this, this tendency to kind of go dark
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  and not to talk about things and, and not to say what's on
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  their mind or, or not to share their true feelings or true
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  experiences. And, and, and the, you know,
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  it's the same thing I try to do with my kids.
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  Like I try not to be shocked by being a client tells me ever,
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  you know, and, and if I am not let them know that I am right.
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  Like that's, that's pretty normal, you know, just kind of
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  normalize the experience. And, and I think for so many
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  people, myself included, right, we, we, we, and, and certainly
• 17:09
  our clients, we get into this, we get into recovery, right?
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  And, and, and we're expecting everyone to have either because
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  it's what we've learned through through childhood or what we've
• 17:21
  been around. We're expecting everyone to have
• 17:24
  these big reactions, right, to, to whether we're succeeding or
• 17:28
  failing what, whatever end of the spectrum, we're residing on
• 17:31
  a given moment, right? Like we're, we're anticipating
• 17:34
  these big loud reaction sometimes, right.
• 17:39
  And, and the more we can just kind of normalize and experience
• 17:42
  and like, yeah, that sucks. And like, I think that's
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  probably happened to most of us, you know, and like and like help
• 17:48
  people walk through that and, and become to feel a little bit
• 17:53
  safer saying what's really going on, a little more comfortable
• 17:57
  telling people, telling people what's happening in their life.
• 18:02
  That makes sense. Yeah, well, it's, you know, it's
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  such a great point. I've never thought about the the
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  sort of flip side of that, you know, always definitely talk
• 18:15
  about it and feel like I hear about you guys saying, you know,
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  when I got sober I expected to parade my honor, you know, that
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  kind of thing. But but I hadn't thought about
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  the kind of the flip side of that though, that we expect that
• 18:25
  loud reaction, but also maybe we can expect to think or we do
• 18:28
  relapse that people are going to be like, Oh my God, it's in the
• 18:30
  world. But it's just, you know, that's
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  just like the two sides of the ego, you know, like I'm, I'm,
• 18:35
  I'm great or I'm terrible. The bottom of the heap or the
• 18:37
  top of the pile. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 18:40
  For sure, man, and. Try.
• 18:44
  Go ahead. Just just really trying to avoid
• 18:46
  all of those extremes and just be a consistent presence, right?
• 18:50
  And, and, and even on the relapse front, right, like
• 18:55
  certainly never the goal of treatment.
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  And you know, we typically have young men and young women engage
• 19:05
  with us in some capacity. I think the, the average differs
• 19:09
  by about four days between the two programs.
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  The men's right now is like 268 days.
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  The women's side, it's like 272 or something like that as of
• 19:17
  last week. But like that's a long time for
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  for a client to be engaged with us and and experiencing
• 19:24
  increased freedom as they go through the program, right?
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  Like for us to delude ourself into thinking, one, that relapse
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  isn't going to happen or two, that assists catastrophic sign
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  of failure is, is in my view, the wrong approach to take
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  right. And the luxury that we have is
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  being able to kind of dynamically respond to those
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  situations with kind of appropriate shifts in container,
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  right, whether those are level of care changes or, or, or what
• 19:55
  support looks like for that individual at given moment,
• 19:57
  right? Like able to avoid that kind of
• 20:03
  catastrophic thinking in those and jumping to catastrophic
• 20:05
  conclusions, right? Those things happen, and
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  certainly not the goal. But how do we contain it when it
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  does? And, you know, again, like
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  historically, like the the other side of the the spectrum there
• 20:22
  is just kind of well, they don't want it yet.
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  You know, they'll, they'll come back when they're ready, you
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  know. Yeah.
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  And so trying to avoid all of that, we can.
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  Wanted to backtrack on one thing we kind of talked about before
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  you, we started recording here and, you know, doing a little
• 20:41
  bit of math, you kind of, you know, you said you got, you're
• 20:44
  coming up on 20 years or around 20 years and then the treatment
• 20:49
  without, you know, you didn't no disparaging of anything, but the
• 20:52
  you created momentum and the momentum has evolved into the
• 20:56
  treatment you wish you had gotten when you were a young
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  guy. Can you talk about, you know,
• 21:03
  how you found recovery and like you know, started momentum?
• 21:08
  Man, like absolutely. And my story was rocky, right?
• 21:16
  And, and and I lost track of how many kind of treatment episodes
• 21:21
  existed between, between the time I was 18 and 24.
• 21:29
  It's fairly safe to say that I spent more time like in
• 21:33
  treatment during those years that I did outside of it,
• 21:36
  generally speaking. And you know, and then at 24
• 21:46
  kind of kind of figured it out for a little bit and then
• 21:49
  struggled a little bit. Then at 27, things shifted
• 21:52
  drastically. But the one of the things, and,
• 21:57
  and this is a big one and it's and nowhere could really hang on
• 22:02
  to me for any given period of time, you know what I mean?
• 22:05
  I would go somewhere, I would do well, I would be like kind of
• 22:11
  that pink cloud you were talking about for the first couple
• 22:14
  weeks. And then I'd be like, all right,
• 22:16
  I've had enough, I'm good now. Find find an excuse to take off.
• 22:22
  And I mean you, you know how that went, right?
• 22:27
  Like it, it went downhill real quick.
• 22:32
  And, and so like the, the first being like not really having
• 22:36
  that continuity of care anywhere, right?
• 22:38
  Like, and we know this for young people, it takes so long.
• 22:42
  It's just such a, you know, you talk about getting sober at 41
• 22:48
  and hard as hell and do not hear me diminishing that for anybody
• 22:52
  that's done it. And like with that full
• 22:54
  prefrontal cortex development and like better decision making
• 22:58
  skills, like folks can go to, you know, thirty 6090 days of,
• 23:06
  of residential and go home and do IOP and, and, and sometimes
• 23:10
  still like hard work and, and an uphill battle for sure.
• 23:15
  And, and many times kind of figure it out, right.
• 23:22
  I don't see many young, you know, 20 year olds doing that,
• 23:25
  right? Like there's just not and, and
• 23:29
  and we know from the research like that it, it takes kind of
• 23:32
  that developing brain so much longer to kind of recover,
• 23:35
  right. So, so my big issue was one I'd
• 23:38
  I'd do all of these kind of short term.
• 23:43
  I don't want to come back to this and put a pin in it.
• 23:45
  But like the short term detox stays where I would just
• 23:47
  discharge right from detox and go home or these like 30 day
• 23:51
  treatment programs where I would go and I would, I would feel
• 23:55
  connected and feel grounded. And then I would go home and, or
• 23:59
  back to wherever. And oftentimes as a result of an
• 24:04
  immediate relationship with a girl, like go downhill really
• 24:08
  fast or, or that would be a part of the puzzle anyway.
• 24:10
  I don't want to blame it on that, but there was like this
• 24:13
  lack of continuity of care. And one of the reasons is there
• 24:16
  wasn't, there wasn't a whole lot of planning for what comes next,
• 24:22
  right? And either by the the
• 24:27
  professionals that, you know, the programs I was in my family
• 24:33
  who was still kind of financially responsible for me
• 24:35
  at that point, or certainly not on my part, right?
• 24:38
  And, and my family didn't know what they didn't know and, and
• 24:43
  treatment providers weren't really, you know, discharge
• 24:50
  planning starts for first day of treatment or whatever, right?
• 24:53
  Like, and they, they would, they would do the paperwork piece of
• 24:56
  it, right? But that there wasn't a lot of
• 24:57
  conversation around what my life was going to look like next, you
• 25:00
  know, and, and I think that's the big play, one of the big
• 25:04
  places that things fell apart. And, and when I say the thing
• 25:11
  about detox, the reason I would say I want to put a put a pen in
• 25:14
  that, it's because like that's kind of you guys jam, right?
• 25:17
  It's kind of like that, that initial step for people in that
• 25:20
  detox and what you do that's so different than what I
• 25:23
  experienced is like, you know, I've obviously worked with your
• 25:28
  team a lot and, and momentum's worked with you guys in all
• 25:31
  kinds of capacity. And you guys are kind of
• 25:32
  aggressively helping people figure out what next steps look
• 25:35
  like when they get in there, right?
• 25:37
  And, and simultaneously like assessing and refining outbound
• 25:44
  referrals and like what, what is really best for this person
• 25:48
  involved. And to the, to the extent, and
• 25:50
  I, I respect the hell out of this to the extent that
• 25:53
  sometimes someone will come in, on occasion, somebody will come
• 25:56
  in to, to new waters and we think maybe they're coming to
• 25:59
  momentum at some point. And like somebody will hit us up
• 26:02
  and be like, hey, there's this thing going on with this person.
• 26:05
  Like they may be better off somewhere else and like that's
• 26:09
  rad, right? Like I really like that.
• 26:12
  And and or like you'll hit us up and be like, Hey, this person
• 26:17
  just, you know, we got this 24 year old guy at detox right now
• 26:20
  and we really got to help his family figure out what's coming
• 26:22
  next. And it sounds like you guys
• 26:24
  would be a great fit for him. But like really trying to work
• 26:26
  to that didn't exist for me, right?
• 26:29
  Like that piece also was, was a huge thing that was missing as
• 26:33
  there would be, you know, I'd go into treatment and they'd kind
• 26:36
  of have these kind of stock standard usually on like a piece
• 26:39
  of paper they would hand you, you know, like here are some
• 26:41
  aftercare recommendations, right?
• 26:43
  And and used to do it or not. Everybody gets the same list.
• 26:47
  Yeah, yeah, for sure. And and that was about all there
• 26:52
  was to it. And the other piece, the other
• 26:55
  huge piece, aside from the continuity of care, and I think
• 26:59
  they're interrelated, that was really missing from me was the
• 27:04
  family support piece, right? Like my parents are awesome
• 27:07
  people, love them to death, supported me through all kinds
• 27:13
  of madness and like they were out of their depth, right?
• 27:17
  Like, and I was good. I was I was probably better.
• 27:21
  I probably remember myself being better than I actually was.
• 27:23
  But like I was pretty, pretty good influencer of them at that
• 27:29
  point in time, right? Like so I would get them.
• 27:31
  What an idea, you know, like I've, I really got it figured
• 27:35
  out this time. Like I just need to get back in
• 27:38
  school. I'm really motivated.
• 27:40
  I got all this stuff going on. Get them sold on this idea and
• 27:43
  they'd be like, all right, yeah, that sounds great.
• 27:45
  Like, you know, and I could tell them all of the things that I
• 27:48
  know that they want for me, right?
• 27:50
  And and, and get them sold on that.
• 27:52
  They'd sign off on it. And here I go.
• 27:55
  And and before you know it, it's it's, it's going downhill
• 27:59
  tremendously, right? So, so I think those are two of
• 28:02
  the big pieces, right that that I missed out on that I wish I
• 28:06
  had was like somebody really like working to on an individual
• 28:12
  basis, help me figure out what comes next and kind of show me
• 28:15
  what it could be. You know, 'cause often times
• 28:19
  that was portrayed to me as like, oh, here's this halfway
• 28:22
  house that's kind of kind of raggedy and maybe in the hood
• 28:25
  that you could go live in for a little while and that's probably
• 28:27
  the best thing you can do. Or it was me selling my, my
• 28:33
  folks on something that wasn't necessarily in my best interest,
• 28:36
  right. And, and, and there was that
• 28:38
  piece missing that that we talked about in the beginning of
• 28:41
  this thing, right? Like, OK, so I'm not supposed
• 28:45
  to, I'm not supposed to use heroin.
• 28:47
  Got it. What am I supposed to do?
• 28:51
  Right. Like we said, we said a month
• 28:54
  talking about me not using heroin and OK, I get it.
• 28:57
  I'm not supposed to do that. Like when I'm sitting at home in
• 29:03
  my room alone and feeling anything, you know, sad,
• 29:11
  anxious, depressed, whatever it might be at that moment, what am
• 29:16
  I supposed to do with that? You know, And like, I got the
• 29:21
  DBT skills or whatever, Cool. Like, but what am I actually
• 29:25
  physically supposed to do with my hands, you know?
• 29:27
  You know what I mean? And not having the practice and
• 29:31
  walking through that. I I think I maybe rambled a
• 29:34
  little bit there, but like those are the three.
• 29:38
  That's but yeah, that that sums it up that.
• 29:41
  Sums it up and what I was exactly what you just ended on
• 29:44
  there the practice and again, you know to to to momentums horn
• 29:49
  a little bit is I think that is one of many things that you guys
• 29:52
  do. But but exactly that you just
• 29:54
  you mentioned that kind of average length of stay that
• 29:56
  people are with you and what was that again 200 and 260 days?
• 30:00
  And 272 on the women's side. I mean, that's, that's amazing,
• 30:04
  man, because again, I think for, for all individuals, but
• 30:06
  definitely those budding adults, like they need that, they need
• 30:09
  that practice, they need that consistency and being able to do
• 30:13
  that for, you know, almost a a year, just exponentially can set
• 30:19
  somebody up for, you know, the potential of having continued
• 30:23
  success in their sobriety. So I mean, I, we love that
• 30:28
  model. We love what you guys are doing
• 30:30
  momentum with that and, and exactly that, like, you know,
• 30:34
  doing exactly what you just said, teaching people like, Hey,
• 30:37
  drugs are bad, right, We shouldn't do that.
• 30:39
  And also like exactly that. Like what do you do, you know,
• 30:42
  how do you cope with this stuff? How do we try some new stuff out
• 30:45
  and, and what does that feel like?
• 30:47
  And I think the practice of learning how to walk through
• 30:50
  life without, without drugs and alcohol as your primary coping
• 30:53
  mechanism is just, I mean, so important, So important.
• 30:58
  Absolutely. Yeah, and if this wasn't made
• 31:00
  super obvious on the front end, I mean, we, we love Momentum so
• 31:04
  much. And like, I mean, I've been
• 31:05
  there several times to visit for various reasons.
• 31:07
  And they've really they not that it's not just a community in the
• 31:11
  sense that they have, you know, the their clients and their
• 31:15
  amazing staff and things to do. And they're involved in the in
• 31:19
  the, you know, in the city of Wilmington, but they have built
• 31:23
  basically a little village on two different campuses, one for
• 31:26
  men, one for women. It's absolutely unbelievable.
• 31:28
  But most important thing is the care they're getting and the
• 31:31
  community they get at Momentum. And I mean, we love momentum to
• 31:35
  the point where we have to make it clear sometimes to other
• 31:38
  treatment centers that no, we are not actually, you know, part
• 31:41
  of the same deal because, you know, we, we, you know, that's,
• 31:44
  that's how much we love momentum.
• 31:46
  So I wanted to make that clear. And you know, sort of on this
• 31:49
  same note, back to the kind of being able to have that soft
• 31:53
  landing when something doesn't go right, whether it's a
• 31:55
  relationship or not, given them that, you know, basically nine
• 31:59
  months. I mean, that's what that math
• 32:00
  basically is. I think I'm not too good at
• 32:02
  math, but it sounds like about nine months, 270 days.
• 32:05
  And I just made me think of something that and again, we
• 32:08
  know that they're going to be relapses here and there.
• 32:10
  And that's to be, you know, would not wanted, but but to be
• 32:13
  expected or at least not to be drastically reacted to.
• 32:17
  But that I just thought about that number of, you know, that
• 32:19
  nine month thing in there. My, one of my, a former Home
• 32:22
  group here in Raleigh, when they give out the nine month chip
• 32:26
  chip, they say anybody got nine months green?
• 32:30
  And then there's sort of a call and response and the people in
• 32:33
  the meeting say don't give out many of those and sort of, you
• 32:36
  know, sort of a tongue in cheek thing.
• 32:37
  But I kept hearing that when I was new and I and I finally
• 32:40
  asked somebody, you know, what is, what does that mean?
• 32:44
  You know, because nine months, I mean, I see people picking up
• 32:47
  years and 2050 years, whatever it is, and they just say there's
• 32:51
  just something about between 6:00 and 9:00 months where
• 32:53
  people get complacent, you know, and if you're and if they're in
• 32:57
  that environment of momentum and that kind of, you know, pink
• 33:00
  cloud may transition to like full on, like I, you know, I've
• 33:04
  got this, you know, and to be there in that community with,
• 33:07
  you know, increasing freedoms, you know, but but to have that
• 33:10
  support as they're coming on up on nine months.
• 33:14
  And again, you know, it's an average and not all there for
• 33:15
  that. But I just that just occurred to
• 33:17
  me how that's such a significant amount of time and early
• 33:20
  sobriety. Well, Rick, this has been great.
• 33:22
  Thank you so much. But as we're up against it here,
• 33:26
  will you just tell our audience how to find you?
• 33:28
  We're going to put all your social handles and stuff on our
• 33:30
  show notes, But how? How do we find momentum?
• 33:33
  Yeah, for sure. The easiest way is just look
• 33:34
  onlinemomentumrecovery.com, right?
• 33:37
  And there's a phone number on there.
• 33:39
  If you call, you will get a live person that works for momentum.
• 33:42
  That's, you know, one, one of four of us.
• 33:46
  That's the easiest way. And the thing I would do is like
• 33:51
  the personal relationship piece is tough.
• 33:53
  Is, is, is tough for a lot of people.
• 33:56
  And it's really important to us, like actually reach out and have
• 34:00
  a have a in person conversation, right?
• 34:02
  Like text chats and you know, emails are great, but we'd much
• 34:08
  rather speak to somebody in person and see if we can help
• 34:10
  them. So if you go to the website,
• 34:12
  it's toll free number on there, you call, you'll get one of four
• 34:15
  people, myself or three others that kind of work in outreach
• 34:20
  and and admission stuff. And now, you know, the other way
• 34:27
  would be they can get the people at New Waters up and they can
• 34:29
  think about my cell phone number.
• 34:31
  There you go. Here we go.
• 34:33
  Well, hey man, thank you for that.
• 34:34
  And like, like new waters, if you call Momentum, you know they
• 34:37
  can't, they can't take everybody and everybody's not appropriate
• 34:40
  the same way it is with new orders.
• 34:41
  But they like us, we help everybody no matter what,
• 34:44
  whether it's just giving them resources or connecting them to,
• 34:47
  you know, local meetings, whatever it is.
• 34:49
  So anyway, Rick, thank you so much for being on here and thank
• 34:52
  you for Momentum because it's an amazing resource for young
• 34:56
  adults. And we love y'all and we
• 34:59
  appreciate you and all that. I do real quick before we wrap
• 35:02
  up because something you were saying before and we had a
• 35:04
  little kind of technical glitch there.
• 35:05
  I just want to make sure you we don't miss that important detail
• 35:09
  for the listeners. But you did say, you know, that
• 35:11
  length of stay that we talked about earlier, that's not
• 35:13
  necessarily a requirement for everyone, right?
• 35:16
  So call, have a conversation, you know, there's some some
• 35:19
  flexibility around that. Yeah, for sure.
• 35:21
  And it and a lot of that, that's an average, right.
• 35:24
  It depends a lot of on what's going on for folks, right.
• 35:27
  Like the commitment we look for is 90 days, right.
• 35:29
  Like we, we don't think we have time to do the work we want to
• 35:32
  do with somebody in less than 90 days.
• 35:34
  So we look for that kind of commitment on the front end, but
• 35:37
  that's it, right? So like, have a conversation and
• 35:39
  let's let's see what feels appropriate.
• 35:43
  Awesome. Very good.
• 35:44
  Great. Thank you, Rick.
• 35:45
  It's great hanging out with you today.
• 35:46
  Yeah, man. Thank you, Rick.
• 35:47
  If you liked what you heard today or just want to know more,
• 35:50
  give us a call on 9196708119 or visit us at
• 35:55
  newwatersrecovery.com. Thank you.