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The Skills That Matter in Every Career · AccessCo Leaders Career Conversations

• speaker-0: Welcome, welcome to AccessCo Leaders Summer Leadership Program. Today we're going to be doing something a little different and discussing the skills that matter in every career. I have Kelly Bhakta on, a sales long-term sales director and business professional, as well as Brian McGrath, a customer solutions and tech service leader. So our core question today is going to be: what skills would you hire for regardless of industry? So today's conversation is something students don't hear nearly enough. Whether you become an engineer, a nurse, a teacher, an entrepreneur, or a CEO, there are certain skills that matter everywhere. They're rarely listed on a resume, they're difficult to measure, but they're often the reason someone gets hired, promoted, or trusted with leadership. Today we're talking about the human skills that create successful careers. So Kelly, tell us a little bit about your current role and what you enjoy most about your work. speaker-2: Thank you so much. First of all, just what a pleasure to be here amongst you guys and and really be addressing this group of individuals that are looking to just really better themselves and maybe plus up what they can for their career. So thank you for this opportunity. So one of the things that I've had the honor of is just being in leadership for many, many, many years. And part of being in leadership and what I love most is just seeing. Others like elevating their potential and seeing them reach maybe goals that they never even dreamt that they could set and reach or achieve, right? And part of that comes with a lot of cheerleading, but there's also the other part that's more the human side. And I kind of say this frequently I'm a people leader, right. So I you you have to acknowledge that we are human to human in our conversations, but sometimes you have to have the tough. conversations as well in order to grow somebody that you truly care about. And so I think from a leadership standpoint and why I love my role in leadership so much is that I get a chance with the wonderful humans that I work with to be able to have such authentic conversations and growth mindset conversations. And by the way, the people are what get the job done, right? When we need to deliver results and what when we need to account for what the business vision is. It a strategy looks great on paper, but we do need the people to actually make it come to life. So that's what I love about what I do. speaker-0: Okay. Authenticity is that major takeaway I heard. being yourself and recognizing that we're human. We're not always gonna be perfect. but that accountability factor comes into play there too. So Brian, tell us a little bit about what you're up to and what you love about your work. speaker-3: Well. first and foremost, I think Kelly did a really nice job kind of explaining the people side of of what I enjoy so much. And it's really building high performing teams and getting the results we want through a highly engaged team that works together both individually and collectively. And I like Kelly believe it's all about the people in the end, right? If you have an end objective or an end strategy. Or an end playbook that you put in place, with the help of the people. it's incumbent upon any good really good leader to put the right people in the right positions, coach them up, be honest with them, be authentic, which is a very good word, be yourself and work with them to achieve your ultimate objectives. So that's what that's what gets me up out of bed every morning and ready to go. And that's why I've had Roughly 20 different jobs in my career across many of the same companies, but they've often had this the same thing in common, and that is building a team, putting the right people in place, coaching them up, sometimes having to coach them out, and that's unfortunate, but it's just part of the job. hiring the right people in other cases and having everybody work towards one common vision and objective. And that that's beautiful really what I enjoy the most about my job. speaker-0: Okay. Well you're guiding us right into our first topic today, first impressions. so when you're building that team, you're gonna choose that team, that first impression does come into play. So when you first meet someone, what what are you paying attention to, Brian? speaker-3: Yeah, first impressions can can be a trap if you're not careful. because they say the average person makes an assessment of an individual when they first meet them within like five seconds or something like that. So I've actually learned in my career to to to to hold back on a first impression and to instead engage with a person seek to understand, seek what they like what they like to do, what they're about, maybe even what their hobbies are, what there's you know, how they how they look at things, and and take more time before I formulate an opinion about a person. because I think that A, you owe it to them and B, often your first impressions are wrong, is what I've learned. so I I'm not really big into first impressions. Instead I'd rather work with individuals and and in the team setting and give them different challenges, mentor them, coach them, see what they're about, see how they see what makes them tick, see what motivates them, see what doesn't motivate them, see how they like to communicate. And from that, put them in a role where they can be successful and for the greater good of the team and ultimately achieve that vision. speaker-0: I love that. And you've really made a conscientious effort to do so because in recognizing that virtues do happen and they can carry weight, you've kind of taken some steps to to go an alternate route Kelly, did you have anything to add there? speaker-2: I would love to add Brian. I think you make a very fair point in that oftentimes we could be mistaken about first impressions. But I do want to call out a couple of things. One is I love a good story, right? And so in that first meeting or in that first conversation, it is human nature to kind of look at like how is this person dressed? And How did they show up? Did they come on time? There's it's just human nature, right? But the minute you start to get to know somebody and understand who they are, or maybe they were held up in traffic and that's why they're late, or whatever that story might be, you you kind of release the tension of that first impression or that first conversation or meeting. But truly the value comes from asking questions and really out of respect for that that moment. To just give it the grace of who is this that I'm speaking with? Who am I meeting? And is there something more on the personal side that gets us established, like commonality first, before we move into maybe a business topic or whatnot? And I do like what Brian said. Sometimes that first impression doesn't tell the full story, it gives you what you need. Maybe it gives you an eye outline. but but that Both individuals are responsible for the engagement and the interaction and making sure that you're moving things forward. And so in Brian's example, it's like, hey, we work together and we get to know each other's work style or we get to converse and we get to understand because there's multiple ways of getting something done, right? And collab we talk about collaboration and we talk about all these things, but it all starts with that first moment of who is this? And how do I understand who you are and and share a little bit about me so that we start building trust and then having those conversations that lead us to next steps. speaker-3: Ness, I'd like to kind of tack onto what Kelly said 'cause I I think she she did a really nice job explaining it and go and and really kind of accentuating the fact that it's important to give people a chance and to learn more about them. one tactic that I've used in big settings, which I think I I'm sure you have too, Kelly, I'm guessing, is the concept of an icebreaker. and if you have a big team of maybe twenty people around a table, you know, you can ask them, You know, t tell me something that you like to do on the weekends or what's your hobby? Or, you know, tell me a a time when you were thought something was going to work out poorly, but ended up being a great time. You know. and and it is amazing how people light up when they tell talk about themselves and generally to find what you originally thought the person when they say, I like to play the tuba. And you're like, Wow. And then somebody else says, I do too. And then they go around the room and this one's a musician. And then then you're thinking you're gonna start a band almost at the end of it. but but it really releases all that kind of nervous energy, especially at first, and it you find all these kind of ancillary connection points that are just priceless as a team. speaker-2: Think too, Brian. I'm sorry, I'm gonna add to that because it's all good stuff, you guys. I think with an audience that might be on the younger side, maybe, or hasn't really had the experience to say, well, here's who I am, here's my story. We often talk about this 30-second elevator speech, right? Like, are you prepared to share a little bit about who you are if someone asks you? And many times that is just simple, it's almost like a conversation is well, this is my name. this is what I enjoy doing when I'm not working, but this is what I do for work and who's most important to me in my life is. And so now you've covered off the the human people, my kids, my furry kids, whatever's important to you, but that's your why many times, right? And as a young person, you don't always go, well, here's my why, but it's Hey, will you tell me a little bit about yourself? And it's like, yeah, my name's Kelly. I love gardening when I'm not at work. I and if I do have time, I love to go on hikes with friends and and work out at the gym. but for my work, this is what I specialize in. And it's not always about the title or whatnot, it's what do you do for work? And then you go into and the most important people in my life that keep me going are this, and so. less of the fancy words, but really telling your story so that it becomes the tuba player comes out in that conversation and you can establish a little bit of the, wow, me too, right? speaker-3: And I think when you're at that mental level as a team, right, in the trenches every day, working hard to make a difference and achieving your mission, whatever that mission is, having those commonalities that might ar might not even be work related, but where you've shared sometimes a lot of the good, but sometimes the bad together, working together, and but also playing together and and sharing together really is kind of very foundational for building a high performing team. 'Cause that builds trust and authenticity and commonality, that that's often required for a highly successful team. That is required for a highly successful team, I should say. speaker-0: Yeah, that trust is definitely paramount. and I like the icebreakers too, and icebreakers that get people excited about something where they're able to talk about something that excites them in their life. speaker-3: As Kelly pointed out, it it's the easiest thing to do, right, to talk about yourself. Right? Because you know yourself better than anybody else. So you want to have. speaker-0: Maybe not at eighteen though. speaker-3: Well, it's something to work on, right? And and and you shouldn't be sheepish about that, right? You are who you are and you're the best version of yourself and nobody is better version of yourself than you. And you should be willing to share that and and have that ready. speaker-0: All right. So with first impressions, before someone even answers a question, what makes them stand out? speaker-2: I don't mind jumping in, Brian. you know, I've I've done a fair share of interviews over time. And I I again going back to the human side of the you know, how they're dressed, let's say it's an interview, how they're dressed, but if you're casually meeting somebody, right? It really is about the person. So let's say myself being able to be professionally mature to go, what's the situation here and who am I meeting, right? But what stands out a lot to me is eye contact and the smiles and the welcoming or inviting kind of feeling to be like, I want to have a conversation with you. And again, you can tell when somebody looks away, meaning, I don't want to talk to you. And I think those are social cues that we have to also accept. And that's not a judgmental scenario. It's more like, okay, I I can respect boundaries, right? but if you meet somebody and there's that first impression, one of the things that really, really just gets me more engaged and really in that interested mindset of I want to know more about you is gonna be the eye contact and that inviting smile. Like, yeah, let's talk, right? so I would say for me, that's the first and most immediate that comes across in a first. scenario like first meeting scenario. speaker-0: The feeling. Brian, can you usually tell within the first few minutes of meeting somebody whether they're prepared or not? speaker-3: That's exactly what I was going to say was well first and foremost, I think Kelly hit hit the hit you know hit the nail on the head when it comes to appearance and being confident, right? And and even looking someone in the eye and introducing yourself. And again, that's all preparation, right? I mean you you can you can be ready for that. and and have that, you know, introduction about who you are and what you're about. so I'm always looking for that. Right. in in an interview candidate. and then from there, I'm looking for somebody who quite frankly has done preparation about the role and about the job and about the company, right? Because I think that's important that they've done some homework on that. and then lastly, somebody who is intellectually curious because I think that. is equally important. You want somebody who's who's leaning forward in the conversation, who's advancing the conversation, and who's actually building on the conversation, right? Because those are all things that are very, very important. but actually is is engaged and curious. So they're asking good questions. How does this work? Why would that, you know, why are you looking for this kind of role? I read your company's going this direction. Can you tell me more about that? That meant preparation, but it also meant curiosity. And I and I look for the same thing in new employees, right? Is is developing that curiosity because I think it's very, very important to help the team, to help the mission of the company, but also to help in your career development. you know, because somebody who's always trying to grow and learn and and do more and contribute is is really important. speaker-0: Well, Brian, you're you're tapping into one of the top things we do here at AccessCo Leaders is work on the active listening and critical thinking and how to do that in real time in a conversation with a professional when you might be nervous or otherwise. So thank you for touching on that. so students spend a lot of time worrying about grades, resumes, credentials. How much do those actually matter compared to someone, the way someone shows up? speaker-3: I'd like to hear from you. speaker-2: Yeah. So I I will say this, and and especially wanting to honor how somebody that's maybe on the younger side of life kind of shaping who they're becoming as a young adult, etc., you're not gonna have all the answers. And a resume doesn't tell everything, and a report card doesn't tell everything. However, can you convey and fill in the blanks? And so what tells me a story is if somebody is you know, working on the weekends and then they've also got the grades and/or they're committed to after school programs and/or they're volunteering because that's a passion point, or maybe they're taking care of their grandparents or their mom who's not well. All of that to me speaks to discipline, it speaks to The commitment, it speaks to that again, that human side of I also have the responsibility in me to keep going and keep moving ahead. Even in adversities, I know that I need to focus on what my full-time job is currently. So if they're a student and they're in school for a full-time, that's their full-time job, is to be a student. And do the very best that they can to shape those grades and the report cards, etc. But in that conversation, what they show up with may not always in that interaction be conveyed. And I would encourage, that's why I kind of started with, I love a good story. In fact, I love a good underdog story. Like, did you have to fight through a few things? Did you have to overcome a few things? Maybe for yourself that you had. Health issues or or whatever that scenario might be. Be truthful in anything that you approach with that. But if you are genuine and you can kind of share the back part of what we see on paper, and you can shape who you are or how you've become who you are. Maybe there's mentors in your life, or your grandmother was your role model, or your grandfather who's no longer alive, but these are the things that you most remember when you. put weave some of those things in, it actually tells me a good story that and and themes come out of that, right? Things like commitment. And that I was I was very caring and giving of my time. And that when you're younger, again building your your responsibilities or your resume or getting into that adult professional role, sometimes those are the things that w you have to share and maybe even bring out in the open, even though it may not be fully comfortable for you, find a way that you can articulate that into the conversation so that again, without saying I'm responsible, I'm committed, I'm caring, I'm giving, it tells that those themes to the other person in the ways that you come across with what you do and what's important to you, right? As you get to this stage. So that's a little bit about and again I keep harping on the storytelling. It's the people side of what we do and how we how we move forward. Super important. speaker-3: Yeah, I I'd just like to build up what Kelly said, because I agree. Storytelling you can use in everyday life and in and work, right? Whether it's an interview, telling about story about yourself or giving a presentation to senior level management or and trying to influence an outcome. Because you'll find that people remember stories. I mean, in fact, people have told me stories like five years ago and I still remember. off on the punchline. so I I you know it's a great way for people to remember you. And it's also a great way to show what you're about. and it's also you know, memorable, right? It it's certainly memorable, but it it also provides connection points because you may be telling a story and it's like, you're from Texas, I'm from Texas, kind of stuff. And then all of a sudden, in fact the first job I ever got, large chemical company in Wilmington, Delaware was because I worked, had worked at that company prior as a co-op. And and as soon as I got that connection with the interview leader, that that was it. that kind of sealed the deal actually. So it was that connection early on that we figured out that was very, very important. There are some technical things I would be concerned about regarding a resume and regarding Again, how you present yourself in the resume. And it's more around I would the overuse of AI. I would be very careful. Now we have AI filters that kind of are looking at you know, you have AI generation tools that can create a resume, and then you have AI filters, screening resumes. So back to kind of our both mine and Kelly's concepts around being authentic and being memorable and being different. You know, you you gotta make sure that if you generate it using AI that you then personalize it so it's you. And it has that story in there that kind of makes you different. So what I'm looking for, you know, first of all, something readable legible, no misspellings, that's very, very simple, but something up front that that has a mission about what you're about and what makes you different and what your key skills are. That's another 10 second kind of test. Especially with screeners, people are looking at that. So they're gonna look at the top part and what's this person about? I'm gonna possibly make a first impression, which we try and all avoid, but and and then you know, go or no go kind of decisions are made very quickly. So, you know, you you gotta make sure all those base things are right in in a resume. And then it's personal, then it's not just only AI, in my opinion. I do read a lot of AI generated ones now, and they it's it's very obvious in most cases. So speaker-0: So even even on the resume you're looking for the story in that those three sentences on the top, the objective. I'm looking at still looking for speaker-3: I mean again, Kelly, great great examples on grit, right? You're gonna look for somebody who, you know, kind of pulled themselves up and and made things happen and people who maybe took a different course in life. because again, as a as somebody screening candidates, you're always trying to say what is their it and kind of what is what makes them different. So that because we're all looking for diverse teams, right? We're all looking for teams, you know, that kind of bring in different skill sets for the greater good. So with that, you're gonna you're gonna be looking for what makes somebody different and then you go, that can fit with my team because I have a bunch I have a bunch of engineers and I really want somebody who's creative and somebody who worked really, really hard to get to where they are and all those kind of things. So you're piecing it all together in that process. so differentiation is critical. speaker-2: Can I double click on that just for a moment, Brian? Cause I love that you brought in AI, because it's a thing now, and you can use AI superpowers to show up, speaker-1: the good and then it could in the speaker-2: you know, gray area as well. But the only thing I wanted to jump in was there's been plenty of and Vinessa, I think your s your question originally was like, do you pay more attention to maybe how they got to and and what they did in before you met them, right? Versus how they showed up that day. And one of the things that I'll say is I can tell almost immediately if that individual is not being authentic, but also they maybe Googled answers to questions, interview questions, or they saw some YouTube screenings of how to prepare for an interview and answer these questions. And it just doesn't come across genuine or authentic. And in today's world of social media, what I do love about social media is that it becomes very much a coaching tool. It's a great learning tool. It allows people to have that awareness and or exposure to some of the questions that might be asked. But if you don't make those responses your own and practice that, that to me is preparedness. Because I have had many interviews where you're dressed in your Sunday best, you look the part, you're acting the part, right? But then when we get into the second and third level questions of what you responded to, and then it's like, I didn't click all the way through that YouTube video. I don't know how to respond to this, right? so I would say use social media, use AI, use your coaching tools that you have out there. because it is important. We are headed in that direction as far as technology goes. However, there is a way that you want to make sure you are absolutely inserting who you are and what that all reflects in how you're responding or engaging without it feeling like canned responses, or I rehearsed this and I'm reading like a script now, versus. I I kind of know, and you don't have to know everything. It's actually really respectable when someone says, you know, I don't know exactly how to answer that question. here's some of the limitations that I may have had from an experience standpoint. However, here's a few things I'm already looking into or willing to do to close the gap on it. And so when you kind of again are self aware that Hey, this might not go completely packaged like a, I walk out of there going, I nail that conversation or that interview. You just want to feel good about I was able to respond and have a good interactive dialogue and really express who I am and what I'm capable of doing. speaker-3: I'd like to add two things to that because very good comments, Kelly. And I agree, for all technology. I mean, we we the humans own the technology. So you can start with an AI response or start with an AI resume, and then we own the rest, right? And we we tailor it towards our needs and ultimately personalize it so that it accurately reflects who we are and we own it and understand it. Couldn't agree more on that. the other point I would I would like to just make. About just the overall conversation that that you'll have during interview is often we're just trying to figure out how the brain works, right? Is the person curious? Are they authentic? We're gonna she and I both it's key. I'm always asking, have they exhibited grit in their life at some point and how have they kind of gotten through the hard times and worked through and gotten to where they are? But the other question I'm always asking is how how do they think? So per Kelly's point, you don't have to always have the answer. But if you say, you know, I'm I'm not exactly sure, but the way I would consider this or think about it is the following. And if you can then say, I would assume this and do this, but I would talk to this person and you kind of tell them the how you would approach it. I mean, that can be really powerful. And then the pro often you're like, Wow, yeah, that's a really good way to think about it, you know, as as an interviewee. So Or as an interviewer, you would think about that with an interviewee. So it's it's just food for thought about if you don't have the exact answer, you you can always say, but how I would it solve for it kind of gives people insight into how you think and how you approach things. speaker-0: I like this. Anybody listening is definitely gonna get the job. And yeah, with AI, you know, listen to the tick the tips, but you gotta make it your own. so we brought up curiosity. Why is curiosity so valuable? speaker-2: I think for me, curiosity. So the the bigger topic for me is growth mindset. And I love when I see this hunger to learn and be curious, right? and ask questions. sometimes we phrase these questions like, I'm about to ask a silly question or a dumb question or whatnot. It's okay to frame it that way. It's actually fun to frame it that way. Even if it is silly or not silly. but to the the point being that you are brave enough to raise your hand or vocalize that the question exists in your mind. And it's sometimes when you are curious, you are opening a conversation starter to two or three other questions, or somebody you ever notice in a group where you go, Hey, I'm gonna ask a silly question, this and that, and then the next person or two other people go. Was gonna ask the same thing, right? And then it go and and then it trickles off into another. Well, now that you say that, can I ask about this? And if you didn't start with that curiosity or that growth mindset or just wanting to understand better, we have to respect everybody learns differently. Some people learn visually, some people learn by listening, and some people learn by just really having a repetitious. two-way conversation. Whatever that looks like in a larger setting, you want to clarify. You want to be brave and be curious and ask the questions. If you are more one-on-one, it becomes a little different, right? You might and and also it depends on the relationship between the two people. If it's a casual I've known you for so long, we're gonna have a different conversation if you're trying to explain something to me and I don't understand it. I'm gonna go in two or three different ways and you're gonna be okay with it. We're gonna probably laugh about it, right? But if it's more of a professional and I don't know you as well, and I don't want you to think I'm dumb or boy, she didn't study at all, or wow, that's you know, if if those are layers that you put in, I would challenge our young minds that are listening to just that the confidence shines through. When you are curious, when you do ask the question. But what I would recommend is that you are engaged and listening so that if that question or the answer to that question was just stated two sentences ago and you ask that same question, now it's a silly question because now you just realize you weren't listening a couple of sentences ago, right? So I would say that there is a fine Delicate dance that we do around being engaged in the moment. But if there is that little tickle in your belly or like just the spark in your mind that you want to know more, that curiosity is absolutely important, even at the risk of is this going to be a silly question? Just do it. It builds courage, it builds confidence, and it helps you navigate what you would do next and how you might engage in the conversation as you continue. speaker-0: Love that you mentioned kind of the relational distinction in curiosity too. that's a good point. Brian, what did you have to add? speaker-3: Yeah, that was I really appreciated Kelly's answer and I agree agree with it wholeheartedly. I truly believe that at any level and as part of any team, you want people to challenge you and ask why and ask where and why we're doing this or how's this working. And I welcome that with my teams and I know my colleagues do too and sure Kelly does as well because I don't claim to know everything and I'm sure my team members don't claim to know everything. So there's nothing better than being in a a safe environment where you can lead with a curiosity or a or a desire to to work together and and for the for the greater good and to ask questions. And I try and build that safe environment and try and build teams that are comfortable with that so they can share their thoughts and their ideas by being curious and being engaged. And with that, I I have seen such amazing progress made, whether it's with just me and my boss, or me and my colleagues, or or or or me and my team, just by somebody asking a simple question. Like, why are we doing this again? And you're like, Well, it's because of ABC. And somebody says, No, I thought we were doing this instead of that. And then you build on it, and then somebody says, But really, I think you better be careful. We and then all of a sudden, you know, what you thought you were doing as a leader or as a team member is different at the end of the meeting. So, which is positive because you're advancing the ball and you're moving together as one team. So, again, a safe environment. I I couldn't agree more with Kelly. You should build on the discussions. and you know, you can't check out and then check in during a meeting or during a conversation. But and then hopefully in the end you've advanced the ball. And I've seen that, you know, I see it several times a day, to be brutally honest, because people are just curious where they asked the question. the only other point I would make is that often when I'm going into meetings, we talked about preparation for for interviews. Often when we're going into meetings, you know, people sometimes say, Brian, How do you approach going into a meeting? Well, if it's managed properly, there's gonna be an agenda. They're probably sending a PowerPoint. What I do is I prepare for it. I say, okay, let me think of three questions that I will have in my hip pocket that that I'm curious about, that I I can't get my head around or I want to learn more about. And with that, I have them. And as I listen to the presentation or the conversation, I may or may not use them, but I have them. And what's so important is A, I came prepared, B, I thought about it. C, often you can ask the question at the right time. You know, people are like, How'd you think of that? Well, you know, I put some time into it, you know. But but more importantly, we advance the ball together. So preparation is also important for me to continue to stuck my curiosity and to be prepared for a meeting. speaker-0: Excellent. Okay, yeah, we're kind of dancing around problem solving too, so touching on that as well, which I love. and we talked a lot about AI. and currently I'm seeing on more job postings about emotional intelligence too, as something that they're looking for. so let's talk about that a little bit. students may hear the phase but may not know what it means. So is that something you all look for or how how would you explain that? speaker-3: I mean, this is what an emerging field, right? even since I started forty years ago in the industry, I mean, emotional intelligence was less discussed, right? It was more about IQ or intelligence and physical skills, right? And technical skills that people had, right? And what they brought to the table. he's an engineer or she's a scientist or whatever. kind of more and and even the resumes look like that, to be honest. But in this fast-paced world, where, you know, we're we're much more productive than we were way back when and we're we're certainly much more collaborative and require flexibility and agility and and and a lot of a lot of thought and reflection every day, you need ultimately the ability to influence people positively, right? And and With that comes the concept of EQ, right? How do you manage your emotions? How do you manage you know your thought process and how do you interact with others positively? And quite frankly, you know, it it it is learned. I and I and I've certainly read enough books on the subject to to know that, but but it's hard. It's hard. many of us, you know, You know, we're we're not classically trained to understand when we're nervous, how to overcome that. Ha ha when we have a have to Kelly brought it up, a courageous conversation with somebody. How do you handle that? That's having a high EQ. How do you be direct in a certain situation? How do you characterize something you know, in a certain way at the right time? Timing is another one in there, right? So it it it it can be learned. There's a lot of books on it. There's a lot of courses on it. I'm sure there's a lot of YouTube videos on it as well. But I mean, the the real issue is then you gotta practice it, right? And and and and try it because it's it's not easy. And you know, it's something that I've really worked later in my career, less about the technical skills, less about my, you know, my my background and you know, and and my formalized training, more around how I get things done with and and And you know, around people. and and that certainly is a journey that you know, you have to practice. speaker-2: For sure. Brian, I love all of that. One of the things I'll add to emotional intelligence, by the way, is a real thing. And the book is amazing if you do like to read. If you don't like to read, that's okay. You could watch a TED talk on it. But get familiar with it because it's going to help you, not just in the workplace, it is super important. If it's a boyfriend, girlfriend, if it's your kids, if it's your mom, your grandpa, it's understanding where the other person's coming from. And so I'll tie that in emotional intelligence. sometimes you might hear these phrases like soft skills versus hard skills. And soft skills tie into a little bit of this emotional intelligence. Soft skills could be empathy. understanding the other person, right? It could be patience, it could be listening, and it could be where you are more flexible in how you're approaching the other person. It's social awareness and social cues, quite frankly, right? so emotional intelligence is super important. It's sometimes a learned skill over time because experiences are going to contribute to. you understanding, wow, I could have handled that a little differently. Or they were having a bad day. Maybe I should have held on to that conversation until tomorrow. But sometimes you need to have, even if it's a bad day, you're making it worse by holding on to something. But that's where you are pausing to think about is this the approach I want to take? Because you're considering the other person, but ultimately it's the outcome or the success. Of whatever that conversation or interaction is going to be, right? And so if you are listening with empathy or listening with patience, or your frustration easily comes out, that's self-awareness for you to understand that, hey, yep, you're frustrated. Maybe right now wasn't the time for you to have this conversation. And many times in the professional world, that's looked at as I'm frustrated, I'm going to type this. nasty gram email right now and I'm gonna hit send and perhaps one moment to pause. Go ahead and get it out of your system. Write that email, but maybe don't hit send just yet. Maybe you look at it and go, do I feel the same way at the end of the day? If I do, go ahead and hit send. Same concept around a conversation. And I will I'm a mother of three. They're all grown adults, but there have been many moments where I'm like, ooh I've literally said to my child or teenager, hey, I think the way you're coming across, you're not ready to talk about this yet. So we're gonna go ahead and pause. And when you feel a little bit like you've calmed down, we're gonna continue this conversation. Well, you have to have emotional intelligence to be able speaker-1: to be able speaker-2: to say that, but if you're younger, you may not have that. It's learned over time. So it's okay, we learn and that falls into communication. It falls under soft skills, emotional intelligence, all of these things are intertwined because they are behaviors, and their behaviors are learned. They're also accepted or rejected, and behaviors are where you learn to understand boundaries, and you also learn how you can help somebody like influence somebody and or inspire somebody to be their very best. And that all of that comes through emotional intelligence and and again how we communicate with purpose. speaker-0: Yes, and I think back to our earlier discussion, it also plays a lot into the trust in the team and that team spirit as well. All right, so let's talk a little bit about the skills you can't teach. what's one quality that you absolutely cannot teach? The toughy. speaker-2: Vinessa. I am going to, Brian, if it's okay, I'll go first on this one. I speaker-1: Sure. speaker-2: feel like the words that are coming to mind for me are grit and hustle. And I I often refer to that as that fire inside your belly to want something or to go after something or to recognize that this is the direction or the path. And I'll share a couple of examples in this space. and and a lot of my time has been spent in the sales environment. So this grit and hustle applies there in an example, but it truly does apply in really any situation. And happy to share a few examples. In the sales world, for example, there are quotas, there are conversations about we must deliver this. type of result and this many results and everything's got to be done with integrity and a lot of care and and fortitude for what what we want the outcome to be. But if that person doesn't bring the grit and hustle meaning and that that's kind of packaged into do I am I self-disciplined? Am I doing things the the processes that's going to make me successful? Am I holding myself accountable? do I set goals and do I really want this goal? Or am I just saying, you know, I want to make a hundred thousand dollars this year, but then you're not willing to put the work in or the effort in, right? to me, grit and hustle is born with you. speaker-1: than you. speaker-2: It is and and it can grow over time. So I don't necessarily want to say it's not a skill that can be taught, but it it there the skill. Spark exists inside you and then it turns into a flame and then it turns into a fire. And it is about how you tick and how you show up and how you take pride and excellence in whatever it is that you're gonna deliver. On a personal side, this might be that student that is like only wanting straight A's, right? You have to also understand that that could don't get in. In your own way, I would say. The grit and hustle is so powerful that you are really being critical of yourself if you don't achieve this goal or if you don't get those straight A's or if you don't have that perfection piece in there, right? We're all gonna grow to that. The most important thing about grit and hustle and bringing that mindset to whatever task you're after or whatever job you want to own or whatever school degree you want to get. Is that the work has to be put in in order for that result to show up? And it is a much better celebration when you've put that effort in versus, and in case somebody's experienced this, when you're handed something or something just fell in your lap because you felt like you got lucky, you don't savor the moment or enjoy the the power of it as much as when you have actually hustled and worked and gotten to the finish line because you put the sweat and tears in, it just feels better. And then you want to brag about it a little bit. Like, yeah, these are the lessons that I learned, but this is what I did. And I'm I'm super proud of that moment, right? So that that's sorry, that's a long answer, Vinessa, but I would say grit and hustle. speaker-0: You're good. Yeah, I can tell you're great at firing your team up. I feel fired up right now. Brian, did you have anything to add? speaker-3: Well, I just start out by saying that I think everything is learnable, right? So you you may be not so good at certain things, but over time if you're aware of them, you can work on them and and improve yourself. So I I would have answered very similarly to Kelly. for me it's I'm always looking for folks with grit, which tends to be starting from within and and is certainly learned. over time, normally through experience. and work ethic, which is akin to her hustle. I'm always looking for that, right? Because that you can bring, right? You can decide are you going to work hard or not. but I but I'm always looking for that. and then I kind of throw in two others. One is attitude, because again, you can decide every morning how you're gonna approach your your your day, right? You can wake up and say it's gonna be great day. And I'm gonna be a part of this team and I'm gonna I'm gonna make a difference and I'm gonna be curious and I'm gonna advance the ball with everybody as in a positive way. and then lastly, this is kind of we haven't touched on it, but I but it is one of my favorites because I see it especially with athletes, is the concept of of embracing failure as part of your journey because we're on a personal journey in life, right? All of us in different port parts of of the journey. but we all experience failure and it's and we all should view it as a way to learn right and to improve and to understand it's part of life. The things don't always go your way. You you you can go through 23 interviews and you may fail at every one or i.e, not get the job or or get screened out. However, that's part of the learning process and that's part of what will make you ultimately the person you're going to be through your journey and also ultimately get you to the place where you're supposed to be. So You know, I I think some people shy away from failure and or view it as as being ex existential and and and and very damaging. But in fact if I think if you've reversed it and said, Okay, I quote unquote did not get what I wanted to achieve, but what did I learn from it? And and realizing it's just part of part of your pathway. speaker-0: Yeah, I love that. I think definitely accountability and like how you bounce back after something does it go as planned are definitely skills that you need to have in every career. speaker-3: We call it the artist's mind or the athlete's mine or the dancer's mind because all of them experience high rates of failure generally. but they all you listen to an interview after an athlete fail does not win a competition or their team does not win it, and you'll you'll hear generally they'll they'll they'll make comments about on learning. We're gonna learn from this and get better. And and that's a good spirit to have, I think, in corporate America and in your personal life. speaker-0: I agree. All right, we're gonna wrap up with a little fun rapid fire. So first thing that comes to mind, just we'll j jump in. So most underrated skill. Rapid fire. speaker-3: I'm gonna say grit speaker-2: Yes. speaker-0: Most overrated skill. speaker-2: Knowing how to do Excel spreadsheets. We got AI now. speaker-1: Yes. speaker-3: Talking too much. I don't know if it's overrated or not, but some people can it can definitely be verbose. speaker-0: The loudest person in the room, right. Best teammate. speaker-2: I think the best teammate is the one who can finish your sentences and finish your thoughts. Because you've worked in synchronized harmony so closely with that same vision that they can they can kind of step in and you wouldn't absolute trust, right? speaker-3: somebody who genuinely cares about working to make you better and to work with you to achieve the ultimate goal, the team. speaker-0: All right, Best communicator. speaker-2: It's the person that directly says what's on their mind. speaker-3: Yes, somebody who doesn't hold back. They tell it the way it is. speaker-0: Right. Most coachable employee. Yes, yes, yes. Need that addendum there. speaker-3: Very good button speaker-0: All right. What's one word every young professional should remember? speaker-2: My one word would be nimble. We're in an ever-changing workforce and quite frankly, world. Like just be nimble. humble might be another one, but let's say nimble because change is inevitable. speaker-3: Yeah, I would say authentic 'cause that's been on a theme in a lot of our answers. so be yourself. You be the be the best version of yourself. there's nobody else like that. speaker-0: Awesome. and then let's finish this sentence as our last thing today. The people who succeed are usually speaker-2: The people who succeed are usually individuals that know themselves, they're grounded, they set goals, but they don't have unrealistic expectations about life or about others. They're willing to be nimble and they're willing to collaborate so that they can achieve. But they also bring a others along on that success journey. speaker-3: I think the people that succeed are willing to fail. They they're they're they understand they're part of a journey, their own personal journey. they embrace that challenge and they they learn from it. And quite frankly, they're not too hard on themselves at the end of the day. speaker-0: Love that. Well, thank you so much, Kelly Bhakta and Brian McGrath. Students, your degree matters, your experience matters, your technical skills matters, but the way you treat people, the way you communicate, the way you learn, and the way you respond when things get difficult, those are the skills that people remember. Those are the skills that build trust, and those are often the skills that shape extraordinary careers. Thank you for joining us for AccessCo Leaders Summer Leadership Series. We'll see you next time.