Latest / Tea Time w/Amie & Bev / Episode #221: Feeling Unsupported

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Episode #221: Feeling Unsupported · Tea Time w/Amie & Bev

• 0:02
  Speaker 1: Hey, everybody, welcome to tea time with Amy and Bev. Hello, sister, Hello,
• 0:07
  Speaker 1: good day, good day.
• 0:10
  Speaker 2: How are you.
• 0:11
  Speaker 1: I am doing quite well, as I was sharing before
• 0:15
  Speaker 1: we hit the record button. I've had a lot on
• 0:19
  Speaker 1: my plate lately, which is fairly typical. It's just how
• 0:24
  Speaker 1: I manage it and how I perceive things. So that's huge.
• 0:32
  Speaker 1: And with that, I actually wanted to talk about or
• 0:36
  Speaker 1: bring up the idea of feeling supported because there are
• 0:42
  Speaker 1: two of us in this household, and as we know
• 0:49
  Speaker 1: with where we live, that the weeds if you don't
• 0:53
  Speaker 1: stay on top of him, Holy moly, right, it's a
• 0:57
  Speaker 1: jungle out there, and that provides space for critters to inhabit,
• 1:05
  Speaker 1: and some of them critters I would prefer not to
• 1:07
  Speaker 1: be inhabited in my yard. So so yesterday and this, well,
• 1:17
  Speaker 1: yesterday I spent three and a half hours working on
• 1:20
  Speaker 1: the backyard and cleaning up the weeds. And in the past, okay,
• 1:27
  Speaker 1: in the past, when I would do things like that,
• 1:30
  Speaker 1: I would be pissed, like very very very mad because
• 1:39
  Speaker 1: I was the only one doing it, and nobody else
• 1:42
  Speaker 1: can take the time to, you know, help out and
• 1:48
  Speaker 1: see that there's a jungle in our yard, and or
• 1:52
  Speaker 1: it could be the dishes, or it could be just
• 1:55
  Speaker 1: picking up your shit around the house, right, just leave it.
• 2:00
  Speaker 1: And then because it was not something I appreciated or wanted,
• 2:09
  Speaker 1: So I don't want trying to clean up the clutter,
• 2:14
  Speaker 1: just being very actually angry about people not in the household. No,
• 2:21
  Speaker 1: before there was more than one two of us. Now
• 2:23
  Speaker 1: there's two of us, and it's been two of us
• 2:25
  Speaker 1: for a while, and so I felt unsupported. And that
• 2:33
  Speaker 1: also showed up in history in the past of finances
• 2:40
  Speaker 1: feeling unsupported, and with that came back issues. So if
• 2:47
  Speaker 1: you if you understand, like Louise Hayes' teachings, and there
• 2:52
  Speaker 1: are others now that financial support or support not feeling
• 2:58
  Speaker 1: unsupport shows up in the back. And I would always
• 3:02
  Speaker 1: like I had back. I was going to the chiropractor
• 3:04
  Speaker 1: on a regular basis and to get the relief. But
• 3:08
  Speaker 1: once I started working on the changing changing my perspective
• 3:14
  Speaker 1: about being supported. I the last time I went to
• 3:20
  Speaker 1: the chiropractor was over a year ago, and prior to that,
• 3:24
  Speaker 1: and I only established I actually I only went to
• 3:27
  Speaker 1: him well one I felt I like the chiropractor feels.
• 3:29
  Speaker 2: Good, but.
• 3:32
  Speaker 1: I wanted to establish a new chiropractor, and I hadn't
• 3:37
  Speaker 1: been for several months prior to that, So that's an indicator.
• 3:43
  Speaker 1: We always talk about our body being indicators of how
• 3:46
  Speaker 1: well we're doing. But yesterday, when I was doing the
• 3:49
  Speaker 1: yard work, my brain, because that is our default programming,
• 3:55
  Speaker 1: my default programming, my brain started to think about why
• 4:01
  Speaker 1: am I the only one doing this? How come no
• 4:03
  Speaker 1: we's here to help me? How come nobody else? Right
• 4:05
  Speaker 1: is started down and it's like, but is that true?
• 4:11
  Speaker 2: State?
• 4:11
  Speaker 1: Like is that true? Like? Are you really not supported?
• 4:16
  Speaker 1: And so I started thinking about it, and I started
• 4:18
  Speaker 1: thinking about the other person who lives in this household,
• 4:21
  Speaker 1: which is my husband, and what he does to contribute.
• 4:25
  Speaker 1: And he didn't know I was going to be pulling weeds.
• 4:28
  Speaker 1: It actually rained a little bit yesterday, and so I
• 4:30
  Speaker 1: was like, oh, this is a great time to go
• 4:32
  Speaker 1: pull the weeds because it'd be easier to pull them out.
• 4:35
  Speaker 1: He didn't know that he had other plans. He was
• 4:37
  Speaker 1: gone for the day. There was no mention or talk about, hey,
• 4:40
  Speaker 1: let's clean up the yard this weekend. There's none of that.
• 4:43
  Speaker 1: I decided to go do it because it actually because
• 4:46
  Speaker 1: it rained, But so changing the mindset, changing the perspective
• 4:54
  Speaker 1: of I am supported. And then I started thinking about
• 4:57
  Speaker 1: while I was cleaning up the yard, I was thinking
• 5:00
  Speaker 1: about how he supports us, and it just really shifted everything.
• 5:07
  Speaker 1: And that was not that was not over, because in
• 5:10
  Speaker 1: history it would be hours of being mad. And this
• 5:16
  Speaker 1: was a very quick recognition, Oh, you're going down that path.
• 5:19
  Speaker 1: That doesn't feel good. We want to change this right now.
• 5:24
  Speaker 1: And I started thinking about so it was just like
• 5:27
  Speaker 1: in moments, not hours or weeks or months. So just
• 5:32
  Speaker 1: really making sure to have the awareness of what are
• 5:37
  Speaker 1: you thinking about so that you can start shifting that quickly.
• 5:41
  Speaker 1: Because that energy of your of your your thoughts, your
• 5:44
  Speaker 1: words and emotions, all that energy matters with what is
• 5:50
  Speaker 1: with with being the creator of your experience.
• 5:55
  Speaker 2: So that's awesome. And I've experience that a big majority
• 6:02
  Speaker 2: of my life, honestly, and it's curious where it all
• 6:05
  Speaker 2: comes from. I'm searching from family members around because they
• 6:09
  Speaker 2: don't have to say anything. You just spill it when
• 6:11
  Speaker 2: you're growing up. But it's also it's like what I'm
• 6:15
  Speaker 2: recognizing recently, I'm really going pretty deep with a lot
• 6:19
  Speaker 2: of stuff lately, and I'm recognizing some people can only
• 6:23
  Speaker 2: meet to you where they're at, and that's okay, But
• 6:26
  Speaker 2: that creates a contrast, right, So that creates an asking,
• 6:30
  Speaker 2: that creates a contrast, and in the in the way
• 6:34
  Speaker 2: of like we've talked about before, Abraham Hicks has talked
• 6:38
  Speaker 2: about through Esther Hicks, how that contrast is what helps
• 6:43
  Speaker 2: us to kind of formulate what we want in our
• 6:45
  Speaker 2: experience or how we want to put things together. And
• 6:48
  Speaker 2: so I've been looking at things a little bit differently
• 6:50
  Speaker 2: and in learning that. You know, we talk all the
• 6:53
  Speaker 2: time about this stuff, and it's like we go through
• 6:55
  Speaker 2: the experiences too, because where when we're in it, we're
• 6:58
  Speaker 2: in it where it's personal to us, we have an
• 7:00
  Speaker 2: attachment to an outcome. There's a lot of things that
• 7:03
  Speaker 2: go on there, but it's to detach yourself from those things.
• 7:06
  Speaker 2: And it's like even recently I sent you a message,
• 7:09
  Speaker 2: like you had sent me a message about a space
• 7:12
  Speaker 2: and I went down and in so many ways the
• 7:16
  Speaker 2: space would be so perfect, a little bit a lot smaller,
• 7:21
  Speaker 2: a lot smaller, but so I wouldn't be able to
• 7:22
  Speaker 2: have group there. But I'm looking at the space and
• 7:27
  Speaker 2: then I'm talking to the girl and it's like the
• 7:28
  Speaker 2: girl's energy was great. It was really more about going
• 7:31
  Speaker 2: and seeing meeting this person really, I mean really, so
• 7:36
  Speaker 2: it was pretty that part was It's pretty impressive. But
• 7:39
  Speaker 2: I had an asking for that because I have a
• 7:42
  Speaker 2: group of people around me, and I've noticed that it's
• 7:47
  Speaker 2: about fixing things. It's all three D stuff, and I'm
• 7:50
  Speaker 2: not about the three D stuff. We have three D stuff.
• 7:53
  Speaker 2: It's always in our experience and that's the what we
• 7:56
  Speaker 2: think is tangible. That's the world stuff going on. I
• 8:00
  Speaker 2: gotta go to work because I got to pay my bills.
• 8:03
  Speaker 2: That whole mentality that to me is all three D
• 8:05
  Speaker 2: but like five d's you're like looking at things like
• 8:08
  Speaker 2: how can we create together? And what if Hey, let's
• 8:11
  Speaker 2: sit here and let's silently talk to each other, but
• 8:14
  Speaker 2: not realize we're talking to each other because there's no
• 8:17
  Speaker 2: mouth movement on the three D level, But on the
• 8:20
  Speaker 2: five D level, we're communicating with each other because it's
• 8:23
  Speaker 2: always happening. I walk into my space yesterday and I tell,
• 8:28
  Speaker 2: excuse me, I go to tell this this person that's
• 8:32
  Speaker 2: she's like a soul where we probably have always been
• 8:36
  Speaker 2: together at some point in our lives. I feel like
• 8:39
  Speaker 2: or maybe she was my guide to the another life.
• 8:40
  Speaker 2: That's very possible actually actually. But so anyways, I walk
• 8:45
  Speaker 2: in there and I start to say something. She says,
• 8:46
  Speaker 2: already know what you're going to say, and I said, okay.
• 8:48
  Speaker 2: So before in the past I've been like, oh, yeah,
• 8:50
  Speaker 2: this is what I was going to say, and I'm
• 8:52
  Speaker 2: like okay, and she knew. She told me exactly what
• 8:54
  Speaker 2: I was going to say. And she said that you're
• 8:56
  Speaker 2: a leader. And I know that I'm a leader, and
• 8:59
  Speaker 2: I know that sometimes being a leader, I'm being unsure
• 9:04
  Speaker 2: of yourself and not having that confidence because I've talked
• 9:06
  Speaker 2: about this wishy washy feeling that I've had inside of
• 9:09
  Speaker 2: me that you like, I want to do things, but
• 9:11
  Speaker 2: it's like it then I don't do things because I
• 9:12
  Speaker 2: feel like I can't do things. But I'm in a
• 9:15
  Speaker 2: space now like I'm just gonna give my notice for
• 9:17
  Speaker 2: my space and it doesn't matter if there's some other
• 9:20
  Speaker 2: space that's right there, because something's gonna pop open. So
• 9:23
  Speaker 2: I figure I'm gonna give a couple of months and
• 9:25
  Speaker 2: that's it. Because initially it was like when I when
• 9:29
  Speaker 2: I walked in and I'm saying the same person, I'm
• 9:31
  Speaker 2: saying something to her about something else. I'm talking about
• 9:33
  Speaker 2: the space and I'm tired of it smelling like lizard
• 9:36
  Speaker 2: cage or whatever. And I and I've got this, you know, blah,
• 9:40
  Speaker 2: I've got all this this angst with insight. And when
• 9:43
  Speaker 2: I say anks, it's not it's nothing like it used
• 9:45
  Speaker 2: to be. Kind of like what you were talking about
• 9:47
  Speaker 2: describing your situation doing the art, it's it's kind of.
• 9:50
  Speaker 2: It got my attention, It gets your attention a lot
• 9:52
  Speaker 2: quicker because it doesn't feel good and this is not
• 9:55
  Speaker 2: the way you want the conversation to go. And while
• 9:57
  Speaker 2: I'm talking to her, my purse just kind of drops,
• 9:59
  Speaker 2: like my hand just drops by purse drops it onto
• 10:03
  Speaker 2: the ground. And she says, exactly, you just got to
• 10:05
  Speaker 2: drop it. And I was like, motherfucker. I said, you're right,
• 10:10
  Speaker 2: but it's true, and it was to drop it from
• 10:13
  Speaker 2: that space. And I said, you're right because I'm not
• 10:14
  Speaker 2: coming at it. I'm coming at it instead of allowing
• 10:18
  Speaker 2: it to be, knowing that it's time for me to
• 10:21
  Speaker 2: let go. But it's also time for me to let
• 10:23
  Speaker 2: go of that space. We can create another beautiful space
• 10:25
  Speaker 2: somewhere else, and it's not serving me, it's serving me
• 10:29
  Speaker 2: for right now, but it's time to move on. And
• 10:32
  Speaker 2: I sometimes I think we stay in situations because we're
• 10:36
  Speaker 2: afraid to move on, because we're we're comfortable in that
• 10:40
  Speaker 2: space and because we know what to expect right. It
• 10:42
  Speaker 2: goes along with everything that we've ever talked about being
• 10:44
  Speaker 2: an abusive relationship, but it doesn't have to be an
• 10:47
  Speaker 2: abusive relationship. It could be situations like this when when
• 10:50
  Speaker 2: you have an asking withinside of you and spirit to
• 10:54
  Speaker 2: a creator God is trying to lead you into a
• 10:56
  Speaker 2: different direction, but you won't let go of that. And
• 10:59
  Speaker 2: then he sit there because said I've sat there and
• 11:02
  Speaker 2: like why the hell am I still in the same space,
• 11:04
  Speaker 2: Like what is the problem? But I realize I am
• 11:07
  Speaker 2: the creator by reality, So the only way for me
• 11:09
  Speaker 2: to to move forward is to let go. And I've
• 11:14
  Speaker 2: got to let go. And it's that it's letting go
• 11:17
  Speaker 2: when I say that, it's in all aspects of my life.
• 11:21
  Speaker 2: So it's not just that's just one thing that was
• 11:23
  Speaker 2: brought to my attention. But when I take a wider
• 11:25
  Speaker 2: stance or when I take a higher position, it's time
• 11:29
  Speaker 2: for me to let go of everything. It is because
• 11:33
  Speaker 2: I don't have any control of an outcome. We have expectations,
• 11:37
  Speaker 2: and that's what I'm talking about, letting go those expectations
• 11:40
  Speaker 2: as well. It's dropping all these things that we think
• 11:44
  Speaker 2: the way things should be and allowing them to be,
• 11:47
  Speaker 2: like allow your It's like we're trying to plant something
• 11:50
  Speaker 2: and Esther always says that, but it's like we're trying
• 11:52
  Speaker 2: to plant something, then we're trying to dig it up
• 11:53
  Speaker 2: a couple of days later because what's going on. Nothing's
• 11:55
  Speaker 2: happening yet, and we're not allowing it the opportunity for
• 11:58
  Speaker 2: its growth. Even though we're creators, we can create things
• 12:02
  Speaker 2: just like that, Thank goodness, there's a little bit of
• 12:05
  Speaker 2: a lapse in time, so it doesn't create because some
• 12:08
  Speaker 2: of the stuff I wouldn't want to create, right, I
• 12:10
  Speaker 2: wouldn't want to so most of the stuff I would.
• 12:14
  Speaker 2: But it's like, it's just all this stuff is happening
• 12:17
  Speaker 2: for me, and it's for me to look at things
• 12:20
  Speaker 2: a little bit differently and kind of decide where do
• 12:22
  Speaker 2: I want to go from here? And also know that
• 12:25
  Speaker 2: people can only meet you where they are, and we
• 12:27
  Speaker 2: can love them anyways. And that's one thing I learned
• 12:30
  Speaker 2: with Jim. I couldn't love him where he was at.
• 12:34
  Speaker 2: I mean, I wasn't in a space where I was
• 12:37
  Speaker 2: I couldn't love myself, so how could I love him
• 12:39
  Speaker 2: where he was at. He was having his own struggles
• 12:41
  Speaker 2: and there was alcohol involved, and I feel like that
• 12:45
  Speaker 2: kind of blurs the edges quite a bit. But it's
• 12:49
  Speaker 2: like that was his coping. But now I'm in a
• 12:51
  Speaker 2: space it's not because I have regret, because I used
• 12:53
  Speaker 2: to have regret about not being able to be that person.
• 12:56
  Speaker 2: But guess what, I did the best that I could
• 12:59
  Speaker 2: in that situation. I did. I couldn't do it any better.
• 13:02
  Speaker 2: I could. I couldn't. I really couldn't. I look back
• 13:05
  Speaker 2: at things and the decisions that I've made and nothing.
• 13:09
  Speaker 2: If I sit here and second guess myself, that makes
• 13:11
  Speaker 2: me wishy washy. So if I second guessed myself and
• 13:14
  Speaker 2: now I'm not allowing myself to know that I did
• 13:16
  Speaker 2: the best that I could at that time, I'm going
• 13:19
  Speaker 2: against myself and I and I don't have trust or
• 13:21
  Speaker 2: have faith in myself. And it's like I feel like,
• 13:24
  Speaker 2: in a lot of ways, maybe our relationship was supposed
• 13:27
  Speaker 2: to go different directions a lot, a lot sooner than
• 13:29
  Speaker 2: I did. But I wasn't willing to let it go.
• 13:32
  Speaker 2: It neither was he. Do you know what I mean?
• 13:34
  Speaker 2: And it's not because it's a good or a bad thing,
• 13:36
  Speaker 2: but it's a growth thing, it's a it's we didn't
• 13:38
  Speaker 2: come here just to have this love of our lives.
• 13:40
  Speaker 2: That's not what life was all about, was to have
• 13:43
  Speaker 2: so many experiences. It's not just to have that. It's
• 13:46
  Speaker 2: but it's not, And it's not just to be to
• 13:48
  Speaker 2: love one person. It's to love all persons. It said
• 13:51
  Speaker 2: love everybody. Now it's it's getting to that space where
• 13:55
  Speaker 2: you can love them all through God's eyes. And that's
• 13:59
  Speaker 2: what I'm constantly doing. Okay, God, I want to see
• 14:01
  Speaker 2: this through your eyes. I want to feel this through
• 14:05
  Speaker 2: how would it feel through your energy instead of through
• 14:08
  Speaker 2: the old patterns and the experiences that I've already had
• 14:11
  Speaker 2: in this lifetime or a previous lifetime that I dragged
• 14:14
  Speaker 2: along with because I still haven't learned when I need
• 14:16
  Speaker 2: to learn from it. So that's where I'm at. I know,
• 14:20
  Speaker 2: it's all I always get like, but it's just it's
• 14:23
  Speaker 2: it just is what it is.
• 14:27
  Speaker 1: Well, and then you know, as you were talking and
• 14:29
  Speaker 1: I was associating, like how I started out with feeling
• 14:32
  Speaker 1: unsupported that the story that you could attached to about
• 14:39
  Speaker 1: the room and in it's smelling because there's a reptile
• 14:42
  Speaker 1: store next to you, and and and this smell comes
• 14:47
  Speaker 1: through into the massage room, which we also have used
• 14:51
  Speaker 1: for a classroom. And you know, you could get attached
• 14:55
  Speaker 1: to the story that the landlord is not supporting you,
• 14:58
  Speaker 1: and you could get angry and bent about it, and
• 15:03
  Speaker 1: that's not going to serve the purpose of the or
• 15:08
  Speaker 1: the idea that well, maybe them being there because there's
• 15:14
  Speaker 1: been what one or two before them that was just
• 15:20
  Speaker 1: something else, right, and so so can get mad about
• 15:28
  Speaker 1: it or release it right right, Well, then maybe this
• 15:34
  Speaker 1: is just an opportunity for me to change gears, switch past,
• 15:41
  Speaker 1: find a new space, and be open to whatever is
• 15:47
  Speaker 1: the universe is conspiring with us to create and and
• 15:54
  Speaker 1: out of it. Right, you met somebody new who's been
• 15:57
  Speaker 1: here for a little while, and you really enjoy her energy.
• 16:01
  Speaker 1: If you were looking for a space that really that
• 16:05
  Speaker 1: connection may not have been made. And so and then
• 16:09
  Speaker 1: there's another connection as you were talking that I was
• 16:11
  Speaker 1: thinking about that I could that I'll give you. So
• 16:18
  Speaker 1: it's it's important. And and also the situation with Jim.
• 16:23
  Speaker 1: So the audience knows Jim is Bev's husband who has passed.
• 16:29
  Speaker 1: And I know because we've we went through it together.
• 16:37
  Speaker 1: And I still have my own experiences that I have
• 16:42
  Speaker 1: regarding alcohol with a spouse, feeling unsupported in the relationship,
• 16:48
  Speaker 1: and what we choose to focus on in the relationship,
• 16:54
  Speaker 1: and when we focus, we know whatever we focus on growth,
• 16:58
  Speaker 1: So more focus on feeling unsupported.
• 17:01
  Speaker 2: Or or their behaviors or.
• 17:05
  Speaker 1: The uncomfortable. Like, the more we focus on it just
• 17:08
  Speaker 1: stirs and stirs and stirs. And that's where we are,
• 17:11
  Speaker 1: and that's where we're living, and that's what we're thinking about,
• 17:13
  Speaker 1: and that's what we're talking about. When we can shift
• 17:18
  Speaker 1: from that focus and focus on something else, then you're
• 17:26
  Speaker 1: not giving the energy to it. It can't expand it
• 17:30
  Speaker 1: can't it can't keep growing. It will fizzle out, it
• 17:33
  Speaker 1: will dissolve, things will change. So I just wanted to
• 17:41
  Speaker 1: highlight that it shows up. Feeling unsupported shows up in
• 17:45
  Speaker 1: our life in so many ways. Maybe you're medical doctors
• 17:49
  Speaker 1: not listening to you, you feel unsupported, or maybe your
• 17:52
  Speaker 1: boss isn't hearing you, you're feeling unsupported. It's just really
• 17:57
  Speaker 1: acknowledging what areas of your life are you? Are you
• 18:01
  Speaker 1: having the perspective that you are unsupported? And then what
• 18:06
  Speaker 1: I like to remember is we have this entire spiritual team,
• 18:10
  Speaker 1: spirit team, entire spirit team. We can't see them, most
• 18:15
  Speaker 1: of us don't see them. We can feel them or
• 18:18
  Speaker 1: just know that they're around and they are helping us.
• 18:22
  Speaker 1: There are help There are our family, our friends that
• 18:25
  Speaker 1: are in spirit, our spirit guides, our sended masters, angels, God,
• 18:31
  Speaker 1: whatever you want to turn to. We have this entire
• 18:33
  Speaker 1: team of spirit that is available to help us. And
• 18:38
  Speaker 1: what better support system to have than that we have to.
• 18:44
  Speaker 2: I gonna say, have to.
• 18:45
  Speaker 1: We be beneficial if we would remember that we have
• 18:50
  Speaker 1: this team of amazing energy available to us who is
• 18:56
  Speaker 1: co creating with us, and that we get to create
• 19:00
  Speaker 1: amazing things in our life if we choose to, if
• 19:03
  Speaker 1: we want to. But it definitely takes diligence, persistence and
• 19:09
  Speaker 1: consistence to have things manifest. Like there are things in
• 19:15
  Speaker 1: my life right now that, again in my history, were
• 19:23
  Speaker 1: from my perspective, we're not good or that would just
• 19:26
  Speaker 1: life sucked. I've changed that within myself and now things
• 19:32
  Speaker 1: are way better.
• 19:35
  Speaker 2: Than they used to be.
• 19:36
  Speaker 1: I have to tell you, like a thousand percent better
• 19:38
  Speaker 1: than they used to be, and so focusing on what's
• 19:41
  Speaker 1: going right, what is feeling good, what is exciting, what changes.
• 19:49
  Speaker 2: Have you made that are Wow.
• 19:51
  Speaker 1: You're just so proud of yourself for so remembering those
• 19:56
  Speaker 1: things and that we also would be important for us
• 19:58
  Speaker 1: to celebrate them. I had a milestone yesterday and I
• 20:03
  Speaker 1: was just sat here, like right here by myself, and
• 20:05
  Speaker 1: I was like, oh my god, this is so good.
• 20:07
  Speaker 1: This is and I was celebrating it by myself and
• 20:11
  Speaker 1: it was okay, but at least I was acknowledging it
• 20:15
  Speaker 1: and the fact like I just said, you know, you man,
• 20:18
  Speaker 1: look how far you've come. You've done so good and
• 20:22
  Speaker 1: things are really amazing right now, Like just having a
• 20:26
  Speaker 1: pep talk with myself and and just expressing to myself
• 20:31
  Speaker 1: where I'm at, and it felt really good to do that.
• 20:35
  Speaker 2: So nice. Also something else I've noticed too with me recently,
• 20:40
  Speaker 2: and I started asking questions because I wasn't and then
• 20:43
  Speaker 2: not even known when I feel like I'm not I
• 20:45
  Speaker 2: don't know the right question ask I'm not getting to
• 20:48
  Speaker 2: the center of it, I guess, but our inner child
• 20:52
  Speaker 2: wanting to be seen and heard, and it's like we've
• 20:54
  Speaker 2: talked a lot about that stuff. But when we recognize
• 20:57
  Speaker 2: certain patterns of behaviors that we do, like when you
• 21:00
  Speaker 2: start witnessing yourself, then I'll start I'll start noticing, well
• 21:04
  Speaker 2: that my my little girl needs to be seen. It's like, well,
• 21:07
  Speaker 2: why does she need to be seen from this perspective?
• 21:10
  Speaker 2: And how can I see her? How can I move
• 21:12
  Speaker 2: beyond this? Because then, no matter what, that puts you
• 21:15
  Speaker 2: in a codependent relationship with whoever you're with. It doesn't
• 21:18
  Speaker 2: matter if your it's your children, your you know, employees,
• 21:23
  Speaker 2: your peers, your spouses, your boyfriends, girlfriends, whatever, it doesn't matter.
• 21:29
  Speaker 2: Does no matter what it's, it shows up. So it's
• 21:32
  Speaker 2: to be in that space where and I'm being open
• 21:35
  Speaker 2: about it and with myself and then looking at this
• 21:38
  Speaker 2: stuff and not knowing, Like even last night as I
• 21:41
  Speaker 2: was processing some of the stuff, not knowing because I
• 21:44
  Speaker 2: noticed that my little girl was showing up and she
• 21:47
  Speaker 2: was wanting to be seen and heard. And I know
• 21:51
  Speaker 2: that's an inside job, but I said, it's one thing
• 21:53
  Speaker 2: to say that it's an inside job. It's another to
• 21:55
  Speaker 2: actually have the experience and to walk through that. So
• 22:00
  Speaker 2: you asked you talked about basically your universal team are
• 22:03
  Speaker 2: spirit teams that are right with us and talking to
• 22:05
  Speaker 2: him like, Okay, how do I move through this because
• 22:08
  Speaker 2: I don't. I'm done carrying this through relationships. I see
• 22:11
  Speaker 2: it now and I'm done with it. Like here's this tool.
• 22:15
  Speaker 2: You can have it back now. I no longer, this
• 22:17
  Speaker 2: is no longer serving me period. And some of the
• 22:22
  Speaker 2: things I feel like it's easy to say, well, just
• 22:24
  Speaker 2: let it go because some things I have just let
• 22:26
  Speaker 2: go of. I've just let it go and it's gone.
• 22:28
  Speaker 2: And I almost feel like just just acknowledging it means
• 22:33
  Speaker 2: it's gone. It doesn't need to be jumping around and
• 22:37
  Speaker 2: doing cartwells and to see what I did. Look at me,
• 22:41
  Speaker 2: look at you know, all that stuff, because it reminds
• 22:42
  Speaker 2: me and I see my That's probably why the grandkids
• 22:46
  Speaker 2: and the kids are within my realm because not a
• 22:49
  Speaker 2: lot of grandparents always have their grandchildren around, and so
• 22:52
  Speaker 2: I'm lucky I get to have them a few times
• 22:54
  Speaker 2: a week. But it's for my growth because I get
• 22:56
  Speaker 2: to grow more from that space because I wasn't growing
• 22:58
  Speaker 2: before from that space. It's just like seeing when we're
• 23:03
  Speaker 2: watching the children, we're watching our children, with our grandchildren,
• 23:07
  Speaker 2: and they trigger something within us because that's what we triggered.
• 23:11
  Speaker 2: That's how we raised them, because that's how we were raised.
• 23:14
  Speaker 2: And so really it's not oh, boo hoo, victim, this
• 23:17
  Speaker 2: is how I raised my kids. It's like, oh, and
• 23:19
  Speaker 2: it's not even victim when I look at myself, but
• 23:20
  Speaker 2: it's a realization that's how I was raised as well.
• 23:23
  Speaker 2: This is just a continuation of that and it doesn't
• 23:26
  Speaker 2: have to be that way anymore. And then I express
• 23:29
  Speaker 2: myself to my kids and they can either take take
• 23:31
  Speaker 2: it or leave it. Really whatever I bring forth, but
• 23:36
  Speaker 2: I don't have an attachment to it. There's like a
• 23:38
  Speaker 2: zero attachment. So it's like letting go of all that stuff.
• 23:41
  Speaker 2: There's so much letting go of things lately. It's not
• 23:44
  Speaker 2: just your stuff that you have around you in your house.
• 23:47
  Speaker 2: It's the letting go of these these behaviors. And you
• 23:51
  Speaker 2: don't know until you're in a situation and you're having
• 23:53
  Speaker 2: an awareness of it. When the next time someone feels like, oh,
• 23:58
  Speaker 2: they're doing this to me, and you know, when you
• 24:01
  Speaker 2: want to throw a temper tantrum. I call them temper
• 24:03
  Speaker 2: tantrums because that's what they are. But when you get
• 24:04
  Speaker 2: pissed off and you want to slam the doors and stuff,
• 24:06
  Speaker 2: that's a temper tantrum. It just is, and that's your
• 24:09
  Speaker 2: little kids showing up, and it's not a bad thing.
• 24:10
  Speaker 2: It's like, wait a minute, I just slammed the door.
• 24:13
  Speaker 2: That means there's something that triggered me here, and it
• 24:16
  Speaker 2: has nothing to do with the other person that triggered
• 24:19
  Speaker 2: you just slam the door. It has to do with
• 24:20
  Speaker 2: the trigger that you have with inside of yourself. So
• 24:23
  Speaker 2: you can slam the door and then blame it on
• 24:25
  Speaker 2: someone else and still carry around the same bullshit. So
• 24:27
  Speaker 2: you can throw that slam the door again the next time,
• 24:29
  Speaker 2: or you can stop for a second and be like, Okay,
• 24:31
  Speaker 2: this is triggering something inside of me. And it's not
• 24:34
  Speaker 2: always easy in the heat of the moments. But as
• 24:37
  Speaker 2: you're following along with a lot of the stuff you start,
• 24:40
  Speaker 2: you have more of awareness. You're watching yourself a little
• 24:42
  Speaker 2: bit more, and you catch yourself a lot earlier. Just
• 24:44
  Speaker 2: like you said, even with the yardwork, so a lot
• 24:46
  Speaker 2: of things, I catch myself a lot earlier. It's not
• 24:49
  Speaker 2: that I don't go through the emotional stuff anymore. I
• 24:52
  Speaker 2: sent you a thing from mat Conn and he was
• 24:54
  Speaker 2: kind of talking about how we react to it was
• 24:56
  Speaker 2: on Instagram. Are the way that we feel about things changes.
• 25:02
  Speaker 2: We can have the same experience that we had yesterday
• 25:04
  Speaker 2: when we were being triggered by all these things. I
• 25:07
  Speaker 2: say yesterday because whenever that was whatever yesterday's it was,
• 25:10
  Speaker 2: And then we can have the same experience today and
• 25:12
  Speaker 2: it not even bother us at all, because because we
• 25:15
  Speaker 2: have different tools and we can look at things differently,
• 25:17
  Speaker 2: and we're not being attached to outcomes and we're we're
• 25:21
  Speaker 2: letting things go and we're being able to see things
• 25:23
  Speaker 2: from a higher perspective and navigating and knowing it's just contrast. Okay,
• 25:28
  Speaker 2: it's contrast. So if I didn't like that way, that
• 25:30
  Speaker 2: wasn't a relationship, what would I write on a piece
• 25:33
  Speaker 2: of paper, because it's our we have power there, what
• 25:35
  Speaker 2: would I write down? What would that relationship look like
• 25:38
  Speaker 2: the opposite of what I experience? And sometimes we don't know, right.
• 25:41
  Speaker 2: Sometimes we have to go reading the romance novel, or
• 25:44
  Speaker 2: sometimes we have to go watch a romantic movie, or
• 25:46
  Speaker 2: we have to whatever, it's whatever, wherever you get the
• 25:49
  Speaker 2: information from. And it's like because then we can kind
• 25:51
  Speaker 2: of like pinpoint, that's what I want, that's what I
• 25:54
  Speaker 2: want to experience in my experience. I've already experienced the
• 25:56
  Speaker 2: other stuff. And it wasn't like from a victim place.
• 25:59
  Speaker 2: It's not it's not to victimize you is to be like,
• 26:02
  Speaker 2: I don't I know what I want from a relationship.
• 26:04
  Speaker 2: It's not that I know how I want to experience life.
• 26:09
  Speaker 2: It's not that. And it's it wasn't like it was
• 26:11
  Speaker 2: a bad thing. It was just like a navigational thing.
• 26:14
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 26:14
  Speaker 2: I don't want to be the rock in the water anymore.
• 26:16
  Speaker 2: I want to be the water.
• 26:21
  Speaker 1: Absolutely. I agree with that. I want to flow with life.
• 26:26
  Speaker 1: I want to allow things to flow to me and
• 26:29
  Speaker 1: be open to receiving them and open to more goodness,
• 26:34
  Speaker 1: more fun, more relaxation, more calm. That's my focus. And
• 26:41
  Speaker 1: and for that to happen, I have to and I
• 26:45
  Speaker 1: say have to, I have to be in a space
• 26:49
  Speaker 1: for that to happen. And so so, yeah, the resistance
• 26:57
  Speaker 1: is to stay angry. The resistance is to stay depressed.
• 27:02
  Speaker 1: The resistance is to focus on not being supported. And
• 27:08
  Speaker 1: the world is against me. I mean, seriously, if you
• 27:11
  Speaker 1: look at thet if you've been watching the news lately
• 27:14
  Speaker 1: or listening to anything.
• 27:15
  Speaker 2: Going on lately.
• 27:18
  Speaker 1: The one thing. On one hand, you could be mad
• 27:22
  Speaker 1: and think the world has lost its damn mind everybody
• 27:25
  Speaker 1: on the planet. Or it could be.
• 27:32
  Speaker 2: Wow, look at people.
• 27:32
  Speaker 1: Uniting, look at how things are going to be changing,
• 27:37
  Speaker 1: and focus on you know, I like to think there's
• 27:40
  Speaker 1: something good that's going to come out of every situation,
• 27:43
  Speaker 1: and so keeping that mindset and focusing on that, and
• 27:48
  Speaker 1: the more energy we put towards that.
• 27:49
  Speaker 2: And I just use that the world events as.
• 27:56
  Speaker 1: As an example. I mean, we always bring it back
• 27:59
  Speaker 1: into us, our inner self, our relationships, our experiences. So
• 28:06
  Speaker 1: we don't have control over the world experiences. But what
• 28:10
  Speaker 1: matters is what are you focused on. You could be
• 28:13
  Speaker 1: angry as all get out about what's going on, but
• 28:17
  Speaker 1: it's not going to change anything that's happening. And the
• 28:22
  Speaker 1: dynamics are You're here, I'm here, Bev's here in our
• 28:26
  Speaker 1: physical bodies for our spirit, and this is my belief
• 28:30
  Speaker 1: system for our spirit to have an experience in the
• 28:32
  Speaker 1: human body on this planet at this time. And I
• 28:39
  Speaker 1: can't control what Bev does, or my husband, or my
• 28:43
  Speaker 1: neighbor or my cowork I can't control any of that,
• 28:47
  Speaker 1: but I can focus on is the most amazing life
• 28:50
  Speaker 1: for me. So it's an opportunity. Right when we see
• 28:58
  Speaker 1: something that causes an ins or a discord within ourselves,
• 29:02
  Speaker 1: an uncomfortable sensation, then what is that a representation of
• 29:06
  Speaker 1: what's going on within ourselves? Within within? Because if if.
• 29:11
  Speaker 2: You feel like.
• 29:14
  Speaker 1: People outside of you, especially people in power, are arrogant
• 29:18
  Speaker 1: and egotistical and ruthless and demeaning and all those things,
• 29:25
  Speaker 1: if that's what you're focused on, Okay, what are they
• 29:28
  Speaker 1: showing me? Let me turn that back in. Oh, I
• 29:33
  Speaker 1: was raised, I was raised by two abusive stepfathers.
• 29:39
  Speaker 2: A lot of that.
• 29:39
  Speaker 1: What is being shown to me out here out in
• 29:42
  Speaker 1: the world, in the public, If I'm getting triggered by that,
• 29:46
  Speaker 1: then I want to look at that and go, Okay,
• 29:48
  Speaker 1: how is that showing up in me? What is it
• 29:50
  Speaker 1: that's making me uncomfortable with this? And if it's making
• 29:55
  Speaker 1: me uncomfortable, there is inner work to do because it
• 30:00
  Speaker 1: I cannot control or change anything outside of me. The
• 30:04
  Speaker 1: only way I can do that is through my own energy.
• 30:07
  Speaker 1: And for my own energy to shift, I have to
• 30:09
  Speaker 1: do my own inner work. It comes back to the self.
• 30:14
  Speaker 1: And this is I know because I did it myself.
• 30:19
  Speaker 1: This is where people get hung up. They don't want
• 30:21
  Speaker 1: to look at themselves. They don't want to take responsibility
• 30:23
  Speaker 1: for the things that they've experienced or said yes to
• 30:28
  Speaker 1: the decisions and choices they've made. I know because I
• 30:32
  Speaker 1: was there. I was like, no, I'm not taking responsibility
• 30:35
  Speaker 1: for that. They did that to me. Okay, there's higher, higher,
• 30:45
  Speaker 1: there's bigger things going on than what we can fathom
• 30:50
  Speaker 1: in our human brain. There's way bigger things happening than
• 30:55
  Speaker 1: what we could ever comprehend from the huge men's standpoint,
• 31:01
  Speaker 1: And like Bev was talking about earlier, her higher self,
• 31:07
  Speaker 1: go higher right, tap into that spirit, guidance and just
• 31:16
  Speaker 1: asked to be shown, ask for help, ask for guidance,
• 31:22
  Speaker 1: ask for it because it will be revealed.
• 31:28
  Speaker 2: Yes, And we're in tennis. So it's like wherever you
• 31:32
  Speaker 2: want to, wherever you want to dial into right, whatever
• 31:35
  Speaker 2: station you want to be on, we're intenna's whatever you
• 31:37
  Speaker 2: want to receive. So when you think about being an antenna,
• 31:39
  Speaker 2: it's like, it's as simple as if I'm going to
• 31:42
  Speaker 2: pay attention to and that's not that's not that's not
• 31:45
  Speaker 2: coming out right. I haven't I don't know what's going
• 31:48
  Speaker 2: on news because I haven't watched anything nobody and let
• 31:50
  Speaker 2: I only get whatever anybody else tells me about because
• 31:53
  Speaker 2: it's not in my experience. And then if it comes
• 31:56
  Speaker 2: into my experience, then I'm asking why is it coming
• 31:58
  Speaker 2: into my experience? And then I'm saying prayers for the
• 32:00
  Speaker 2: people that are there because for them, they're in a
• 32:02
  Speaker 2: space of struggle. But I feel like in a lot
• 32:05
  Speaker 2: of ways, if we're if we're being pulled to watch
• 32:09
  Speaker 2: a war, that means that we have a war going
• 32:12
  Speaker 2: on withinside of ourselves. And so when you were saying
• 32:15
  Speaker 2: that right when you're watching the fighting, because I haven't seen,
• 32:19
  Speaker 2: I like I said, I don't know. And some people
• 32:21
  Speaker 2: I've heard recently that I didn't want to feel like
• 32:24
  Speaker 2: I was ignorant, so I made sure watch those things
• 32:26
  Speaker 2: so I could have a conversation with people. Well, I
• 32:28
  Speaker 2: don't want to have a conversation with people about I mean.
• 32:31
  Speaker 2: So it's like you can feel like it's ignorant and
• 32:33
  Speaker 2: that's on you, and it's like that's a learning curve
• 32:36
  Speaker 2: for you. Because I don't feel that way. I feel
• 32:39
  Speaker 2: that whatever I give my energy to I can grow,
• 32:42
  Speaker 2: I can create more of it, and if it does
• 32:45
  Speaker 2: come into my experience as contrasting, then I again still
• 32:48
  Speaker 2: have the opportunity to create what would it look like
• 32:50
  Speaker 2: in my world to be the opposite of how it's
• 32:54
  Speaker 2: shown up. And it's like if more people did that
• 32:58
  Speaker 2: kind of stuff, things would change every I mean, things
• 33:01
  Speaker 2: would change that catch their eye right, that snag their attention,
• 33:05
  Speaker 2: Like Suzanne Ghi Eastman says, She'll say it snags you.
• 33:08
  Speaker 2: Spirit will snag you, and they do. But it's like
• 33:11
  Speaker 2: it's it's that's all the same thing. It's like, what
• 33:13
  Speaker 2: are you giving your attention to? Because whatever you're giving
• 33:16
  Speaker 2: your attention to is gonna grow. It doesn't matter what
• 33:18
  Speaker 2: it is. If you're mad about something, it's gonna give
• 33:20
  Speaker 2: your If you're mad about the price of whatever the
• 33:24
  Speaker 2: tea in China, I don't know, then you're gonna you're
• 33:27
  Speaker 2: gonna have They're gonna give you some more prices that
• 33:29
  Speaker 2: you're gonna be irritated about. Right, That's just the way
• 33:31
  Speaker 2: it is. That is this fact, that is the that's energy.
• 33:34
  Speaker 2: That's just the way it works. If I'm in a
• 33:37
  Speaker 2: loving space, am I going to be receiving hate?
• 33:39
  Speaker 1: No?
• 33:40
  Speaker 2: Doesn't mean that some people might not might hate me
• 33:42
  Speaker 2: because where I'm at, sure, but doesn't mean that it's
• 33:45
  Speaker 2: gonna be my experience. I might not ever even know
• 33:47
  Speaker 2: about it unless I dip down and someone will say, hey,
• 33:49
  Speaker 2: did you hear And I'll be like, oh, well that's interesting.
• 33:54
  Speaker 2: Look at them, look at them showing up, or or
• 33:57
  Speaker 2: look at me how I have shown up? Because I
• 33:58
  Speaker 2: have shown up that way I have. I've been that person.
• 34:01
  Speaker 2: I mean, I've been on the opposite side of the
• 34:02
  Speaker 2: spectrum of everything. So it's like I can't It's it's
• 34:06
  Speaker 2: so easy to get so angry because that's the old pattern, right,
• 34:09
  Speaker 2: that's the motivation. And it's a different thing when you
• 34:13
  Speaker 2: can be when I can realize if I keep smelling
• 34:16
  Speaker 2: the space from my neighbors into my space, it's not
• 34:20
  Speaker 2: a punishment, it's time. It's it's a movement thing. It's like,
• 34:24
  Speaker 2: do I want to stay in this space or do
• 34:26
  Speaker 2: you want to go? Do I? Every time I walk
• 34:27
  Speaker 2: in there, I get to catch it all up there,
• 34:30
  Speaker 2: you know, because I haven't had the air conditioner running
• 34:32
  Speaker 2: constantly to filter the air because I'm not there. You know,
• 34:35
  Speaker 2: if I'm not there for three and four days, the
• 34:37
  Speaker 2: or's no reason to have ac on, so you are
• 34:40
  Speaker 2: constantly at a lower temperature. So it's like looking at
• 34:43
  Speaker 2: things and noticing that it's it's a motivational thing. It's
• 34:47
  Speaker 2: like it's like it's a gentle nudge right there. It's
• 34:50
  Speaker 2: so subtle. Babest, time for you to leave the space. Babest,
• 34:54
  Speaker 2: time for you to leave the space. We had some
• 34:56
  Speaker 2: had some stuff before, but for me, I felt like
• 34:58
  Speaker 2: a lot of the previous people that where there was
• 35:00
  Speaker 2: for my growth honestly, and for another person's growth that
• 35:04
  Speaker 2: had been using my space too, speaking up for themselves
• 35:07
  Speaker 2: and using their own words and not expecting someone else
• 35:10
  Speaker 2: to do it for them. So when there's a situation
• 35:13
  Speaker 2: and you're having in the experience in this situation and
• 35:15
  Speaker 2: you're telling someone else, but you didn't do anything about
• 35:17
  Speaker 2: it when you were there. If you ever felt like
• 35:20
  Speaker 2: there was something that was going on, it's like, don't
• 35:22
  Speaker 2: wait to share it with someone else unless you're calling
• 35:25
  Speaker 2: the police department to say, hey, there's something going on
• 35:27
  Speaker 2: next door. Because there was stuff going on next door,
• 35:31
  Speaker 2: but it's like it was for a growth thing and
• 35:34
  Speaker 2: I didn't have that in my experience. And then all
• 35:36
  Speaker 2: of a sudden. I did have that in my experience,
• 35:38
  Speaker 2: and then I did call to have, you know, a
• 35:42
  Speaker 2: well check on people to make sure everybody was okay
• 35:44
  Speaker 2: because we're businesses and this is next door to my space.
• 35:47
  Speaker 2: But there was a learning for all that stuff. And
• 35:50
  Speaker 2: so they left and it was like great, and then
• 35:52
  Speaker 2: it's like now it's just time. It's like we've talked
• 35:55
  Speaker 2: about before having a bigger space, but for me, it's
• 35:58
  Speaker 2: like even just having a quiet space, a nice space,
• 36:03
  Speaker 2: a space that doesn't smell. But that was all contrast
• 36:07
  Speaker 2: just for me to redefine what I want, and I
• 36:09
  Speaker 2: do want something bigger, but certainly within my budget at
• 36:12
  Speaker 2: this time or else if it's going to be more okay, universe,
• 36:18
  Speaker 2: make the budget go higher, you know, make sure that
• 36:21
  Speaker 2: there's other ways of this being taken care of or
• 36:24
  Speaker 2: knowing which way to go. It's paying attention to these passions.
• 36:27
  Speaker 2: Right here we go. Here's another example. So we're talking
• 36:33
  Speaker 2: during group. Someone had brought up that where they want
• 36:36
  Speaker 2: to do a vision board. So hopefully I don't offend
• 36:38
  Speaker 2: anybody that's watching this that comes in the group, but
• 36:41
  Speaker 2: they want to do a vision board, so they're going
• 36:44
  Speaker 2: to bring in magazines. One of the gals was going
• 36:45
  Speaker 2: to bring in magazines. My understanding is they're going to
• 36:48
  Speaker 2: take their magazines to go home. And then the last
• 36:51
  Speaker 2: group it was, oh, well we can do it in here.
• 36:54
  Speaker 2: We could get it done in a few hours. And it's
• 36:56
  Speaker 2: like I sat with that because I thought, I got
• 37:00
  Speaker 2: to be open minded about this, but this isn't where
• 37:03
  Speaker 2: my where for for my group. That's not where my
• 37:05
  Speaker 2: group's going because that's three D. Because I'm not I'm
• 37:08
  Speaker 2: not dissing because I do have a vision board because
• 37:11
  Speaker 2: it kind of keeps me into the an ideal what
• 37:13
  Speaker 2: are what are where I want to be at my
• 37:15
  Speaker 2: three D? So so I was looking at all that
• 37:19
  Speaker 2: stuff and then it's like it was kind of interesting
• 37:23
  Speaker 2: because it was like, all like I lost control, not
• 37:27
  Speaker 2: lost control because I didn't recognize it as that, but
• 37:29
  Speaker 2: I wasn't in control. I wasn't being the leader I
• 37:32
  Speaker 2: guess would probably be a better way of saying it.
• 37:35
  Speaker 2: But with that being said, I came left their open
• 37:38
  Speaker 2: minded and I put it a little post out on
• 37:40
  Speaker 2: Facebook to say, hey, anyone have new magazines because we're
• 37:43
  Speaker 2: going to be creating uh visions flat stream boards and
• 37:49
  Speaker 2: I had a couple of people respond and one of
• 37:51
  Speaker 2: them was my aunt on my father's side, which I
• 37:53
  Speaker 2: don't have a whole lot to do with the family
• 37:55
  Speaker 2: because again because my grandfather molested me on my dad side,
• 38:01
  Speaker 2: I have he was a moluster right in my mind
• 38:05
  Speaker 2: child that's still child mindset. He is so much more
• 38:10
  Speaker 2: than a molester, do you know what I mean. He's
• 38:11
  Speaker 2: not just a molester. He was a good man in
• 38:13
  Speaker 2: a lot of ways, a lot of other ways that
• 38:17
  Speaker 2: I didn't get to see. But I cut off the
• 38:18
  Speaker 2: whole family like I cut them all. I didn't want
• 38:20
  Speaker 2: nothing to do with any of them. And so this
• 38:23
  Speaker 2: presented another opportunity, just like just like you saying about
• 38:25
  Speaker 2: the space. And so I got to meet this other
• 38:27
  Speaker 2: lady that we've changed, exchanged numbers and stuff because we
• 38:30
  Speaker 2: enjoyed each other. So I decided to go over to
• 38:34
  Speaker 2: my aunt's house. And now I'm hearing stories from my aunts,
• 38:37
  Speaker 2: and I'm asking her about mynn and my papa, and
• 38:39
  Speaker 2: she says, oh, that's you know, that's my great grandmother,
• 38:42
  Speaker 2: or that's my grandmother, that's your great grandmother. And she's
• 38:45
  Speaker 2: talking about how she has always been a rancher, and
• 38:47
  Speaker 2: she always did all these things, even when she was
• 38:49
  Speaker 2: sixty years old. She's rolling a four hundred pound cow
• 38:51
  Speaker 2: back and forth. That was a milking cow. I don't
• 38:54
  Speaker 2: know if she had to keep moving it or so.
• 38:55
  Speaker 2: I don't know what the whole situation was, but her
• 38:59
  Speaker 2: being so small because she was she wasn't a big woman,
• 39:02
  Speaker 2: but she worked with the land. She grew all of
• 39:05
  Speaker 2: her own stuff. They were self sustainable everything. And I
• 39:09
  Speaker 2: have found recently that I have a passion for that.
• 39:11
  Speaker 2: I can fill it within when I start to talk
• 39:13
  Speaker 2: about it, I get excited. There's a I don't know
• 39:16
  Speaker 2: if I brought it up last time, but you can
• 39:18
  Speaker 2: find it on Amazon. It's called the Biggest, Biggest Little Farm,
• 39:23
  Speaker 2: and it's awesome. It's been out for a little bit,
• 39:24
  Speaker 2: but it's an awesome it's awesome, and I was in
• 39:28
  Speaker 2: such I felt so good watching that. But I also
• 39:31
  Speaker 2: I'm noticing that, like as when I think about spirit
• 39:34
  Speaker 2: and stuff like that, I get it like this, these
• 39:37
  Speaker 2: little butterflies and stuff in my stomach and it's like
• 39:40
  Speaker 2: a it's like an excitement and stuff like that. So
• 39:43
  Speaker 2: it's it's I couldn't notice these things before because I
• 39:46
  Speaker 2: didn't allow myself to feel anything. I didn't allow myself
• 39:49
  Speaker 2: to feel emotions, let alone excitement. For God's sakes, I
• 39:53
  Speaker 2: just knew how to be stoic and quieted. And everyone
• 39:57
  Speaker 2: thinks so on the outside that you got your shit
• 39:58
  Speaker 2: together and you got it all figured out, life's going great,
• 40:01
  Speaker 2: and it's like, on the inside is like, help me,
• 40:04
  Speaker 2: but you can not even the stay and help me because
• 40:06
  Speaker 2: you don't. You just don't even have the tools to
• 40:08
  Speaker 2: do that yet. But I've gone through all this journey
• 40:10
  Speaker 2: and it's like you were saying something earlier about gosh,
• 40:13
  Speaker 2: I don't remember what it was, oh about wanting to
• 40:15
  Speaker 2: hear it. You know, we don't want to hear that
• 40:18
  Speaker 2: this has to do with us and stuff like that.
• 40:19
  Speaker 2: But I was cutting myself off from my whole family.
• 40:22
  Speaker 2: I was cutting myself off. But when you think about
• 40:24
  Speaker 2: that's just cutting myself off from the family, I'm cutting
• 40:26
  Speaker 2: myself off from a lot of things. Now I'm an adult,
• 40:29
  Speaker 2: So it's a different story for anybody else that's out
• 40:31
  Speaker 2: there that's experienced someone that's abusive or sexually abusive or
• 40:34
  Speaker 2: anything that kind of stuff in a family dynamics. But
• 40:37
  Speaker 2: I'm an adult now, do I say, I'm going to
• 40:39
  Speaker 2: bring my grandkids around. Oh, hell, no, I'm not. But
• 40:43
  Speaker 2: I'm gaining I mean, not that I would have a
• 40:45
  Speaker 2: problem with my aunt, but I'm gaining so much information
• 40:48
  Speaker 2: that it's stuff that I didn't know about. And she
• 40:50
  Speaker 2: said that our family came over on the Mayflower or whatever.
• 40:56
  Speaker 2: I can't even remember what she said exactly all the stuff,
• 40:58
  Speaker 2: but she was telling me so much information, and it's
• 41:00
  Speaker 2: like then I found myself even excited about that. But
• 41:03
  Speaker 2: I wouldn't have gotten that if someone in the group
• 41:05
  Speaker 2: didn't assume or or whatever. Which is an opportunity for
• 41:10
  Speaker 2: me on the next group to be like, here's the magazines.
• 41:13
  Speaker 2: You guys can go do them on your time, where
• 41:14
  Speaker 2: you guys can all meet each other's houses, whatever you
• 41:16
  Speaker 2: guys want to do. That's fine with me. But group
• 41:19
  Speaker 2: is for creating not from the dream bar, but from
• 41:24
  Speaker 2: more of a five D, like for a channeling and
• 41:26
  Speaker 2: readings and spiritual contact and practicing our telepathy or just
• 41:33
  Speaker 2: connecting with each other, you know, just being able to
• 41:35
  Speaker 2: walk into a space that you know what the other
• 41:37
  Speaker 2: person's gonna say already, so that you guys are on
• 41:39
  Speaker 2: the same you know you're on the same wavelength because
• 41:41
  Speaker 2: we're antennas and we're tuned in right, It's like all
• 41:44
  Speaker 2: these things boom boom boom have had something to do
• 41:47
  Speaker 2: with something else and it's been phenomenal. And then she
• 41:50
  Speaker 2: gives me this dish and then she tells me that
• 41:53
  Speaker 2: my nana always kept a plate of water next to
• 41:56
  Speaker 2: the front door for the bees. I'm like, you've got
• 41:58
  Speaker 2: to be kidding me, because we've got a bird sitting
• 42:00
  Speaker 2: in our back door and it's at the back door
• 42:02
  Speaker 2: because it's a glass door, and I love to watch
• 42:05
  Speaker 2: the bees out there, and I love to go out there,
• 42:07
  Speaker 2: and i'd love to have the humming around me when
• 42:08
  Speaker 2: they're doing it their work. It's just awesome, Like life
• 42:12
  Speaker 2: is freaking amazing when you're looking at it from that aspect.
• 42:16
  Speaker 2: And so it's like whatever you want to look at
• 42:17
  Speaker 2: right when I'm appreciating and being in that space, I'm
• 42:20
  Speaker 2: bringing more to me that's just like that that I
• 42:23
  Speaker 2: could never even fathom. Right now, I'm a frequency match
• 42:26
  Speaker 2: to all these things that I don't know in this
• 42:29
  Speaker 2: lifetime because I haven't allowed myself to have that experience.
• 42:32
  Speaker 2: Because we get so familiar with where we're at and
• 42:35
  Speaker 2: we feel like we got to control it. And it's
• 42:37
  Speaker 2: like you hear the whole everybody saying, Oh, I want
• 42:39
  Speaker 2: to go back to the way it was, and it's like, no,
• 42:41
  Speaker 2: you don't. You don't want to go back to the
• 42:43
  Speaker 2: way it was. It's scary right now because we don't
• 42:45
  Speaker 2: know where it's going. That's what's scary to a lot
• 42:47
  Speaker 2: of people. But it doesn't mean it's not going to
• 42:50
  Speaker 2: be amazing. And it's like that's where we create from.
• 42:53
  Speaker 2: We're creating from an amazing place instead of from a
• 42:55
  Speaker 2: place that's being been has been so controllable and controlled.
• 42:59
  Speaker 2: There's some people I've listened to you recently. I don't
• 43:02
  Speaker 2: know how far I want to take their information, but
• 43:04
  Speaker 2: it's like they're talking about maybe we won't even have
• 43:07
  Speaker 2: an election, maybe we're not going to have the government.
• 43:10
  Speaker 2: I mean, maybe there's a whole full breakdown that's about
• 43:12
  Speaker 2: to go we're about to go through. But guess what,
• 43:15
  Speaker 2: we all signed up for this and we can create
• 43:18
  Speaker 2: it that that's an opportunity when there's a breakdown of
• 43:20
  Speaker 2: something else, like the phoenix. When the phoenix burns up completely,
• 43:23
  Speaker 2: it's reborn. So what's going to be born out of that.
• 43:27
  Speaker 2: It could be it could be amazing, or it could
• 43:29
  Speaker 2: be horrible. It's your story. Mine's going to be amazing,
• 43:33
  Speaker 2: right and I know yours will be amazing because we
• 43:35
  Speaker 2: don't stay in that space because we know what we
• 43:37
  Speaker 2: want to create. We know we know we want to
• 43:40
  Speaker 2: create from a space that feels good. These things that
• 43:43
  Speaker 2: feel good, these things that give us that passion that
• 43:45
  Speaker 2: the feelings that you feel, the butterflies in the stomach,
• 43:47
  Speaker 2: those are the things we're creating from. And you don't
• 43:50
  Speaker 2: know until you tune into it. Because I didn't know
• 43:52
  Speaker 2: until I tuned into it. But you just keep forging
• 43:55
  Speaker 2: ahead because I did, and now I'm I am where
• 43:58
  Speaker 2: I'm at right now, which I pretty amazing. It does
• 44:01
  Speaker 2: have some ship moments, not gonna lie it does, but
• 44:04
  Speaker 2: it doesn't my perspective on those ship moments don't stay
• 44:07
  Speaker 2: in there for very long. And I go through an
• 44:09
  Speaker 2: internal process and I'm calling on my team like, hey,
• 44:13
  Speaker 2: i need some help because I'm not sure even if
• 44:16
  Speaker 2: I am, even if I do think I'm sure, I'm
• 44:18
  Speaker 2: still going to ask for help because what if I
• 44:22
  Speaker 2: don't know? What if I'm only again using the same
• 44:25
  Speaker 2: template of all the experiences I've ever had in this
• 44:28
  Speaker 2: lifetime because I can't create from something I don't know,
• 44:32
  Speaker 2: but they can help me.
• 44:38
  Speaker 1: Well, first of all i'm talking, I just want to
• 44:40
  Speaker 1: hit on the division board dream board experience is for
• 44:46
  Speaker 1: them to create them on their own time, but bring
• 44:50
  Speaker 1: them in and share so that everybody collectively can share
• 44:54
  Speaker 1: in their vision to expand that energy for them. For
• 44:58
  Speaker 1: each person, I think that would be a me that's awesome.
• 45:02
  Speaker 2: And knowing that.
• 45:11
  Speaker 1: We have an opportunity in how we show up in
• 45:14
  Speaker 1: this life, in how we contribute to our energy, to
• 45:18
  Speaker 1: our experiences, and like Bev was talking about the Phoenix rising,
• 45:23
  Speaker 1: we in ourselves have to break down. We have to
• 45:28
  Speaker 1: they call it, you know, going.
• 45:31
  Speaker 2: Into the.
• 45:33
  Speaker 1: Shadow, our shadow selves, our dark side of ourselves, which
• 45:37
  Speaker 1: is all that havingness that we've been carrying and look
• 45:41
  Speaker 1: at it and sift through it and see it because
• 45:44
  Speaker 1: it's all pretty much childhood bullshit and the stories that
• 45:49
  Speaker 1: we've just been hanging onto that from an adult perspective, Now,
• 45:54
  Speaker 1: if you've been interested in learning about yourself and growing
• 45:57
  Speaker 1: and expanding and personal development and self awareness and all
• 46:01
  Speaker 1: the things that now from an adult perspective, to look
• 46:05
  Speaker 1: back and see your life story from a different point
• 46:10
  Speaker 1: of view. It's amazing work, and it's incredible the outcomes
• 46:17
  Speaker 1: just doing the work within yourself. And again going back
• 46:21
  Speaker 1: to we don't have any control of anything outside of ourselves.
• 46:24
  Speaker 1: We have control over us and ourselves, and we get
• 46:30
  Speaker 1: to determine, to create, to choose what we want our
• 46:35
  Speaker 1: story to be. And I also wanted to hit on
• 46:39
  Speaker 1: when I was talking about earlier about the world events
• 46:41
  Speaker 1: and things like that, that we're each here to have
• 46:44
  Speaker 1: our experiences. So whatever is going out going on outside
• 46:49
  Speaker 1: in the world, they're here for their experiences, and what
• 46:54
  Speaker 1: they do with the information that they get from having
• 46:57
  Speaker 1: those experiences.
• 46:58
  Speaker 2: Is their choice.
• 47:00
  Speaker 1: They're going to keep screwing up, fucking up making the
• 47:04
  Speaker 1: wrong choices from your perspective, but it could be all
• 47:08
  Speaker 1: right on their journey, and we don't get to determine that. Yes,
• 47:14
  Speaker 1: that's something that that's sometimes hard to remember. Even I
• 47:21
  Speaker 1: still have to remember that I don't get to decide
• 47:24
  Speaker 1: if that was right or wrong for their choice. I
• 47:27
  Speaker 1: don't get to decide if they are on their right
• 47:30
  Speaker 1: path or wrong path. That is not for me to
• 47:33
  Speaker 1: decide or choose. That I know what's right for me
• 47:37
  Speaker 1: or what's wrong for me, and using those words just
• 47:41
  Speaker 1: to describe what feels good and what doesn't feel good. Right,
• 47:47
  Speaker 1: there's no right or wrong, and there's just experiences. It's
• 47:50
  Speaker 1: what we do with the information that we gain from it.
• 47:53
  Speaker 1: But knowing that the amount of energy that we put
• 48:00
  Speaker 1: on other people, the drama and the chaos, if we
• 48:06
  Speaker 1: would take all of that energy and turn it towards ourselves,
• 48:10
  Speaker 1: do you know how freaking phenomenal each and every one
• 48:13
  Speaker 1: of us could be On a higher level. We're already phenomenal,
• 48:18
  Speaker 1: we're spirit and body. We're already phenomenal, and I'm not
• 48:21
  Speaker 1: degrading that at all, But how much more incredible it
• 48:25
  Speaker 1: could be if we would give more time, attention, and
• 48:29
  Speaker 1: energy to ourselves and a not a not an egotistical manner,
• 48:36
  Speaker 1: a healing manner, because when each one of us does
• 48:40
  Speaker 1: our own inner work, it collectively affects the rest of
• 48:44
  Speaker 1: the world, not just your household, not just your neighbor,
• 48:48
  Speaker 1: not just your coworkers, the entire world, the entire universe. Actually,
• 48:55
  Speaker 1: if we want to just expand out there. But sometimes
• 48:57
  Speaker 1: when we say that, people are like, oh my god,
• 49:00
  Speaker 1: I don't want that kind of responsibility. No, your responsibility
• 49:02
  Speaker 1: is you.
• 49:04
  Speaker 2: That's it.
• 49:05
  Speaker 1: Your responsibility is you. With the exception if you have
• 49:07
  Speaker 1: little people, that is it. We want to keep them safe.
• 49:12
  Speaker 1: But the priority and responsibility is yourself, and how you
• 49:17
  Speaker 1: choose that path is up to you. There's no doubt
• 49:21
  Speaker 1: if I would have had coaches when I was a teenager,
• 49:25
  Speaker 1: my life would have been completely different. If I would
• 49:28
  Speaker 1: have had a coach in my twenties, my life would
• 49:30
  Speaker 1: have been completely different. But the journey I took was
• 49:33
  Speaker 1: the journey for me. The journey Bev took was the
• 49:36
  Speaker 1: journey for her. The journey the audience think it's the
• 49:40
  Speaker 1: journey for you, but we all have you know, we
• 49:44
  Speaker 1: all have to remember we're all here for our own experiences. Now,
• 49:49
  Speaker 1: what we attach, what stories we attach to those experiences
• 49:54
  Speaker 1: is where, excuse me, where we get to learn and
• 49:56
  Speaker 1: grow from. And if you don't like it, then you
• 50:02
  Speaker 1: are the one that has to change, not anybody else.
• 50:07
  Speaker 1: Let me say that again. If you don't like the
• 50:10
  Speaker 1: way your life is going, you have to change, and
• 50:17
  Speaker 1: that is your choice. And we always have to say
• 50:21
  Speaker 1: that it's your choice. We have to say that in
• 50:23
  Speaker 1: every video we do.
• 50:27
  Speaker 2: Your joint and really, when we're judging another, we're bringing
• 50:32
  Speaker 2: that experience right into our own experience. Yes, and it
• 50:35
  Speaker 2: might not be something immediately, but it will be something
• 50:37
  Speaker 2: that eventually comes there, because it's like it's the universe
• 50:40
  Speaker 2: that heard it enough times, or you put enough passion
• 50:42
  Speaker 2: towards it enough times, whatever, whatever it is, whatever it is,
• 50:46
  Speaker 2: because even your anger could be passionate too. You could
• 50:49
  Speaker 2: be passionately angry in saying something, and they're bringing that
• 50:52
  Speaker 2: into your into fruition. So it really is to allow
• 50:55
  Speaker 2: others to have their experience and be more interested in
• 50:58
  Speaker 2: why am I being trigger? Why am I feeling these
• 51:01
  Speaker 2: things right now? Due to what I'm observing? So's we
• 51:05
  Speaker 2: hit there. It's an opportunity, right, everything's an opportunity.
• 51:09
  Speaker 1: Yeah. There.
• 51:10
  Speaker 2: You can go right to the left, or we can
• 51:11
  Speaker 2: go straight, or we can go backwards. It doesn't even matter.
• 51:14
  Speaker 2: It doesn't It just really doesn't matter. And it's it's
• 51:16
  Speaker 2: funny because if I was to before, if I was
• 51:20
  Speaker 2: to take a look at my life, I would have
• 51:22
  Speaker 2: made several different decisions differently, and now it's it's it's
• 51:27
  Speaker 2: shifted because now it's like I know that I did.
• 51:30
  Speaker 2: I don't want to go back and do it all
• 51:32
  Speaker 2: over again like I used to want to. I used
• 51:34
  Speaker 2: to really want to go back and do things over
• 51:36
  Speaker 2: again because I really feel like I had done a disservice.
• 51:40
  Speaker 2: But now when I think about it, I can't think
• 51:43
  Speaker 2: that way. I can if I want to, but thinking
• 51:46
  Speaker 2: that way takes away from me having my own confidence.
• 51:49
  Speaker 2: And that's the reason I could think that way because
• 51:51
  Speaker 2: I didn't have confidence on myself. I didn't have that
• 51:53
  Speaker 2: and it wasn't something that someone could give me. It
• 51:56
  Speaker 2: wasn't something to go into the gym all the time
• 51:58
  Speaker 2: could give me. Because I still didn't have the confidence.
• 52:00
  Speaker 2: I just looked like I was more confidence. I didn't
• 52:03
  Speaker 2: have the confidence. And it's interesting because now that I
• 52:06
  Speaker 2: have more confidence and stuff I don't. I don't know
• 52:10
  Speaker 2: what the deal is. It's like many times I find
• 52:12
  Speaker 2: it differently, but it's like I just find myself not
• 52:14
  Speaker 2: at the gym. I just I have. Before my life
• 52:19
  Speaker 2: would revolve around it, and now it's like something that
• 52:22
  Speaker 2: I don't have. I'd rather go see the grandkids, or
• 52:25
  Speaker 2: I'd rather I want to get home to be with Freeman,
• 52:28
  Speaker 2: or I want to go, you know, do other things.
• 52:31
  Speaker 2: It's and it's not like a wanting that I it
• 52:34
  Speaker 2: just doesn't have the same priority as it used to.
• 52:37
  Speaker 2: But I don't feel like I like I told people recently,
• 52:40
  Speaker 2: I'm letting my hair grow out, and it's like it's
• 52:42
  Speaker 2: I've got gray around the sites and I like it.
• 52:45
  Speaker 2: And I even had a dream, well, I had an
• 52:48
  Speaker 2: experience while I was sleeping that I was focused on
• 52:51
  Speaker 2: that I could see the transition between the color, my
• 52:53
  Speaker 2: natural color of it's coming in and the hair color
• 52:55
  Speaker 2: of it it is. And I was thinking I was
• 52:58
  Speaker 2: focusing all this energy and I could feel energy that
• 53:00
  Speaker 2: was making my hair grow faster, thicker, and longer with
• 53:03
  Speaker 2: my natural hair coming out. So it's just interesting because
• 53:06
  Speaker 2: I was watching myself, watching myself in the mirror, like
• 53:10
  Speaker 2: looking at myself in the mirror and checking things out
• 53:12
  Speaker 2: and everything. But to me, it feels like it's I'm
• 53:14
  Speaker 2: getting softer. It doesn't even with the muscles. I don't
• 53:18
  Speaker 2: feel regardless. And it has nothing to do with anybody
• 53:22
  Speaker 2: outside of me, because before I would have said yes,
• 53:24
  Speaker 2: but it's it gave me the opportunity to go within
• 53:27
  Speaker 2: and recognize there this balance. I like the feminine site,
• 53:30
  Speaker 2: so me having the big muscles and hard muscles and
• 53:33
  Speaker 2: stuff like I used to. Isn't a goal for me anymore.
• 53:37
  Speaker 2: I don't have a drive for it. That's not that's
• 53:39
  Speaker 2: I guess that's more three D. That's more. And I'm
• 53:43
  Speaker 2: not going to say it's ego, but in some ways
• 53:45
  Speaker 2: it is ego, you know, But I don't want people
• 53:49
  Speaker 2: who are going to have their own opinions about that,
• 53:50
  Speaker 2: but from it's just my perspective of myself, not of
• 53:53
  Speaker 2: anybody else. But I do feel like it was a
• 53:55
  Speaker 2: lot of ego because I know that my ego would
• 53:57
  Speaker 2: pop up and it still does occasionally at the gym
• 54:00
  Speaker 2: right when it when someone comes in there looking something
• 54:02
  Speaker 2: and I'm like, I could do more than that, and
• 54:05
  Speaker 2: it but it's like I don't want you anymore. I
• 54:07
  Speaker 2: don't want I don't have that desire or I like
• 54:09
  Speaker 2: the soft feminine look. I like the muscular look too,
• 54:12
  Speaker 2: but I like a softer feminine, muscular look instead of
• 54:15
  Speaker 2: before I wanted to compete with the men and and
• 54:17
  Speaker 2: have this strong body and everything like that, just because
• 54:22
  Speaker 2: I felt like that was that was me protecting myself,
• 54:25
  Speaker 2: that was me trying to gain confidence. That was me,
• 54:28
  Speaker 2: you know, getting attention. My little girl's being seen all
• 54:31
  Speaker 2: the time, you know what I mean. So there's like
• 54:33
  Speaker 2: a transitionary things that's been going on with me for
• 54:36
  Speaker 2: a while, and it's it's not being seen for those
• 54:39
  Speaker 2: things anymore, and that's it's a different place and it's
• 54:44
  Speaker 2: I'm not missing it so much. It actually feels relieving
• 54:48
  Speaker 2: to not be in that space all the time.
• 54:50
  Speaker 1: M h.
• 54:51
  Speaker 2: But also at the same point, I know that I
• 54:53
  Speaker 2: want to do things to make myself feel good. So
• 54:55
  Speaker 2: what do I do. I play tag with my grandkids.
• 54:57
  Speaker 2: We run around just not to self. Don' run around
• 55:00
  Speaker 2: barefoot on concrete for a long time because it'll lock
• 55:02
  Speaker 2: up your feet a bit. But I mean otherwise, you know,
• 55:05
  Speaker 2: you have to kind of quick moves and do things,
• 55:08
  Speaker 2: and it's to me that's more fun. I'd like to
• 55:12
  Speaker 2: have a pool meal to go swimming all the time
• 55:13
  Speaker 2: in it, and that would probably be another thing that
• 55:15
  Speaker 2: I would do, but which was never something that was
• 55:17
  Speaker 2: on my mind before because that wasn't my that didn't
• 55:21
  Speaker 2: that wasn't my drive and stuff. So it's like it's
• 55:23
  Speaker 2: interesting as we changed through life, and it's I don't
• 55:27
  Speaker 2: even want to say age because I don't think it's
• 55:28
  Speaker 2: an age. It's just a it's just like a closing
• 55:30
  Speaker 2: of a chapter that like, that chapter is completed and
• 55:33
  Speaker 2: now I'm going into a new chapter, and what does
• 55:35
  Speaker 2: that look like for me? Well, I like the idea
• 55:38
  Speaker 2: of yoga and plots and stuff like that, which didn't
• 55:41
  Speaker 2: wasn't appealing to me in that last chapter. So it's
• 55:44
  Speaker 2: it's interesting that we're going through these growth and these changes,
• 55:47
  Speaker 2: the food changes, being drawn to different things. It's because
• 55:50
  Speaker 2: there's there's changes going on. This last week my calendar,
• 55:54
  Speaker 2: I couldn't get people in on my calendar. I could not,
• 55:58
  Speaker 2: I really and it's like every time I would get
• 56:00
  Speaker 2: and these are just people that just couldn't come in.
• 56:04
  Speaker 2: And then I'm trying to fill the spots, and before
• 56:05
  Speaker 2: I never had a problem with that. And to me,
• 56:07
  Speaker 2: it's not it's to let me know I don't have
• 56:09
  Speaker 2: to swim upstream again trying to fill these spots. It's
• 56:12
  Speaker 2: letting me know that there's a transition happening. There's it's
• 56:15
  Speaker 2: it's a transition leaving this space and it's not something
• 56:19
  Speaker 2: I have to do. It's just like we go back
• 56:20
  Speaker 2: to the beginning of the conversation. It's just something to
• 56:23
  Speaker 2: let go because I've been holding on to the side
• 56:25
  Speaker 2: so hard, you know, I don't want to let go
• 56:27
  Speaker 2: of the bank. And then it's like as soon as
• 56:28
  Speaker 2: you let go, it's like, oh, oh God, did you
• 56:30
  Speaker 2: see that tree over there? It's freaking beautiful? What about
• 56:33
  Speaker 2: that bird? Like didn't he started enjoying the journey down
• 56:35
  Speaker 2: the river? Right? But I wasn't because I was fighting
• 56:37
  Speaker 2: it and getting beat up in the face by twigs
• 56:40
  Speaker 2: that were going by and water going in my face
• 56:42
  Speaker 2: and people other people going by and waving at me,
• 56:45
  Speaker 2: like why are you still holding on? But it's interesting
• 56:49
  Speaker 2: because that's what it is. That's what it is, because
• 56:51
  Speaker 2: we get stuck in these these paradigms like I've got
• 56:54
  Speaker 2: to pay these bills and I've got to do this,
• 56:56
  Speaker 2: and I've got you know, all that three D stuff,
• 56:58
  Speaker 2: instead of letting it go and knowing things are going
• 56:59
  Speaker 2: to work out. They're just going to work out. It
• 57:02
  Speaker 2: just is. But we don't know how it's going to
• 57:04
  Speaker 2: work out because we don't know what that looks like
• 57:05
  Speaker 2: because it hasn't been in our experience so far, because
• 57:08
  Speaker 2: we haven't let go, And for new chapters to begin,
• 57:12
  Speaker 2: something has to end. Yes, right, So change has to
• 57:16
  Speaker 2: take place, and it could be very very minuscal or
• 57:20
  Speaker 2: it could be huge, like something that just forces you
• 57:24
  Speaker 2: into a change. And because you're choosing to make some changes,
• 57:31
  Speaker 2: you're meeting new people.
• 57:33
  Speaker 1: Yes, it's just the same with me. As you were
• 57:36
  Speaker 1: talking about that earlier about meeting new people and stuff,
• 57:38
  Speaker 1: I was like, Yeah, by me deciding to go back
• 57:44
  Speaker 1: to work to have a full time job where I'm at,
• 57:49
  Speaker 1: I am meeting so many people that are in the
• 57:56
  Speaker 1: therapy and behavioral fields that there could be potentially some
• 58:04
  Speaker 1: sort of collaboration or partnership which would be another change.
• 58:12
  Speaker 1: And where that goes, I don't know.
• 58:14
  Speaker 2: It may never.
• 58:15
  Speaker 1: Happened, and it could have happened yet tomorrow, Like I
• 58:17
  Speaker 1: don't know, But what I am open to is showing
• 58:22
  Speaker 1: up every day to see where it leads.
• 58:25
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Right.
• 58:26
  Speaker 1: And but the idea that if I wouldn't have have
• 58:30
  Speaker 1: taken this position in this job, I wouldn't have been
• 58:35
  Speaker 1: open to meeting all these new people and learning new things.
• 58:39
  Speaker 1: And it's also has opened me up to other like
• 58:45
  Speaker 1: leadership roles, and that wouldn't happened if I would have
• 58:51
  Speaker 1: been sitting here in this room every day doing my thing,
• 58:59
  Speaker 1: and what I was doing that for a few years,
• 59:02
  Speaker 1: I was telling the universe, I need to get out
• 59:07
  Speaker 1: in the public. I need to be out in the
• 59:09
  Speaker 1: public more. And then this job opportunity comes up, and
• 59:14
  Speaker 1: it's like, I don't think it could have been any
• 59:17
  Speaker 1: better position for me to take than the one I'm
• 59:20
  Speaker 1: in right now. And just the idea of being open
• 59:25
  Speaker 1: to where this chapter leads, because for the next chapter
• 59:30
  Speaker 1: to begin, one has to end. And whatever that looks like,
• 59:34
  Speaker 1: it's like, I'm open to it, and it feels good
• 59:37
  Speaker 1: to feel that way instead of like you said, like
• 59:39
  Speaker 1: grasping onto Okay, I gotta do this for the next
• 59:42
  Speaker 1: twenty years, so I make sure I'm financially secure. No,
• 59:46
  Speaker 1: I'm doing it for now. It's serving its purpose for
• 59:49
  Speaker 1: now in whatever way that and however long that looks like.
• 59:55
  Speaker 2: I will listen to my friends. She's telling me about
• 59:57
  Speaker 2: stuff yesterday because what it looks like right, because we
• 59:59
  Speaker 2: can't fathom some things. And she's talking about an interview
• 1:00:02
  Speaker 2: she was listening to and the guys, like she said,
• 1:00:04
  Speaker 2: the other guy is pretty smart, so that one the
• 1:00:07
  Speaker 2: one kid, says, how much money you think we're making?
• 1:00:09
  Speaker 2: And he says he was very thoughtful, and he says,
• 1:00:12
  Speaker 2: I think you're probably making around four or five hundred
• 1:00:14
  Speaker 2: thousand a month. And I thought, holy shit, Like we don't.
• 1:00:17
  Speaker 2: But that's what I mean. The whole conversation that we're having,
• 1:00:20
  Speaker 2: we get so limited, like, oh, this year, I'd like
• 1:00:22
  Speaker 2: to make one hundred thousand. No, who are you like?
• 1:00:26
  Speaker 2: But we don't know that until you hear somebody else's conversation.
• 1:00:29
  Speaker 2: And then when you hear that, it's like, holy smokes.
• 1:00:31
  Speaker 2: I never gosh, what if I was making four or
• 1:00:33
  Speaker 2: five hundred thousand dollars a month, that's pretty freaking phenomenal.
• 1:00:36
  Speaker 2: What would I do with that? And I'm thinking, well,
• 1:00:38
  Speaker 2: the first thing that I think of, or my eye
• 1:00:40
  Speaker 2: picks up my grandkids. I've got a picture over on
• 1:00:43
  Speaker 2: my wall with a pictures of my grandchildren. It is like,
• 1:00:46
  Speaker 2: that's why we would be going places, we'd be doing things,
• 1:00:49
  Speaker 2: but we would still be doing these things too, because
• 1:00:51
  Speaker 2: these things are so important our conversations. And it's like
• 1:00:54
  Speaker 2: when I was talking to the gal yesterday that I
• 1:00:57
  Speaker 2: had just met for that space, I told her about
• 1:01:00
  Speaker 2: tea time because she said, oh, she says, oh, you
• 1:01:03
  Speaker 2: know you're with Amy or whatever. I said, are you
• 1:01:06
  Speaker 2: know Amy or something like that. I said, yeah, we're
• 1:01:07
  Speaker 2: the ones that we do tea time together and I
• 1:01:10
  Speaker 2: so I'm talking to her about that. But it's like
• 1:01:12
  Speaker 2: it's just another way, I said. We have conversations like
• 1:01:15
  Speaker 2: we're having right now. But this is what's that's the
• 1:01:18
  Speaker 2: what's valuable about all this stuff because we're having these
• 1:01:20
  Speaker 2: conversations that are happening all the time. And it's like
• 1:01:23
  Speaker 2: that I was listening to the group and they were
• 1:01:25
  Speaker 2: so there was some focus on political stuff like that
• 1:01:27
  Speaker 2: and everything else, and it's like, but that's not that's
• 1:01:30
  Speaker 2: not we can focus on that stuff. But I mean,
• 1:01:33
  Speaker 2: I don't want to create from someone else's creation. That's
• 1:01:35
  Speaker 2: not my creation. I want to create something else. I
• 1:01:38
  Speaker 2: could create from that, you know, take a spin off
• 1:01:40
  Speaker 2: on it and write my own story. But so it's
• 1:01:43
  Speaker 2: like I like these kind of conversations. But it's like
• 1:01:46
  Speaker 2: it's just so wonderful to see where you're going because
• 1:01:49
  Speaker 2: we if someone would have said to you five years ago, hey, Amy,
• 1:01:53
  Speaker 2: you might be collaborating with a bunch of people that
• 1:01:55
  Speaker 2: are doing counseling and everything else because you have a
• 1:01:57
  Speaker 2: different perspective on things in it because it's not gone
• 1:02:01
  Speaker 2: through the schooling. My whole thing is people would say, bab,
• 1:02:03
  Speaker 2: why don't you be a counselor before I'm like, god,
• 1:02:05
  Speaker 2: I want to go through the school and they're going
• 1:02:07
  Speaker 2: to fuck me up. They'll they'll screw up the way
• 1:02:09
  Speaker 2: I think. And then I'm now I have a different,
• 1:02:11
  Speaker 2: you know, a list of things to look at that
• 1:02:14
  Speaker 2: I think that these people fall into this Listen, that's
• 1:02:17
  Speaker 2: not I don't feel like it's true. These people don't
• 1:02:19
  Speaker 2: fall into place. They might have examples of it, experiences
• 1:02:22
  Speaker 2: of it, so but it's like, would you have ever
• 1:02:26
  Speaker 2: thought that that would even be where you go to?
• 1:02:28
  Speaker 2: Probably not. And then it's like, that's not an end story.
• 1:02:30
  Speaker 2: That reminds me of the whole Susan Geese ban. Right,
• 1:02:33
  Speaker 2: she's military. The next thing, you know, her daughter dies,
• 1:02:37
  Speaker 2: her stepdaughter dies, and then she starts meditating every single
• 1:02:40
  Speaker 2: day just because so it's graduating from that. Now she's
• 1:02:43
  Speaker 2: meditating all the time because she knows that there's her
• 1:02:45
  Speaker 2: daughter stepdaughter's got to be out there. She just knows.
• 1:02:48
  Speaker 2: Because it's weird to look at a human body suit
• 1:02:53
  Speaker 2: that's that's empty. It from the souls no longer there.
• 1:02:55
  Speaker 2: The soul has disappeared from that suit, and it's so lifeless,
• 1:02:59
  Speaker 2: and it's like, well where that soulgo? Like where did
• 1:03:01
  Speaker 2: it go? So it kept her questioning things and then
• 1:03:05
  Speaker 2: next thing you know, she's channeling, and then she's doing
• 1:03:08
  Speaker 2: psychic readings for mediumship, for for everybody, and now she's
• 1:03:11
  Speaker 2: teaching it and she still does channeling and she's still there.
• 1:03:15
  Speaker 2: There's we were constantly evolving, and it's like it's never
• 1:03:18
  Speaker 2: it's never a one and done. But that's the fun
• 1:03:21
  Speaker 2: of it all, because it's like it's where's it going
• 1:03:22
  Speaker 2: to go to next? I bow all these feelings, so
• 1:03:25
  Speaker 2: what so if I look back, even on my time frames,
• 1:03:28
  Speaker 2: I have been losing track of time, losing track of dates,
• 1:03:31
  Speaker 2: not putting stuff on, not hanging the sign up on
• 1:03:34
  Speaker 2: the outside my door, like things that I do on
• 1:03:36
  Speaker 2: a regular routine basis have been slowly slopping away. And
• 1:03:41
  Speaker 2: it's and it's and it's because I'm being guided in
• 1:03:44
  Speaker 2: that direction, because I because maybe for me that was
• 1:03:48
  Speaker 2: that's the path of least resistance for me to do
• 1:03:50
  Speaker 2: a little bit at a time, because maybe too much
• 1:03:52
  Speaker 2: changed for a Taurus, which I don't even really feel
• 1:03:54
  Speaker 2: like one hundred percent tourists anymore. On percent everything is
• 1:03:59
  Speaker 2: following from you. I'm just using it as an example
• 1:04:01
  Speaker 2: because a little bit at a time is easier for
• 1:04:04
  Speaker 2: a lot of us and all but at one time
• 1:04:06
  Speaker 2: right like that. You think about the COVID the shutdown.
• 1:04:09
  Speaker 2: That was a lot for everybody. But on the other
• 1:04:11
  Speaker 2: side of that, there was so many blessings that were
• 1:04:13
  Speaker 2: coming from that. And it so depends on what we
• 1:04:16
  Speaker 2: were talking about earlier, whatever we want to train our
• 1:04:18
  Speaker 2: sights on. I can drive down the road and I
• 1:04:21
  Speaker 2: can see an angry couple having an argument with each other,
• 1:04:23
  Speaker 2: or I can notice the birds that are applying by
• 1:04:25
  Speaker 2: the beautiful trees, the ooh, there's a nice car that
• 1:04:28
  Speaker 2: just drove by. Someone driving by and singing in their
• 1:04:31
  Speaker 2: car and laughing. I mean, there's so many other things
• 1:04:33
  Speaker 2: that you could be noticing, and noticing all that stuff
• 1:04:37
  Speaker 2: is more uplifting and changed you. It doesn't mean that
• 1:04:40
  Speaker 2: you're ignoring the other stuff, but you don't need to
• 1:04:42
  Speaker 2: have that in your experience anymore because you've already learned
• 1:04:45
  Speaker 2: from that. That's what the difference is. People that are
• 1:04:49
  Speaker 2: in wars and all that stuff they're still learning. They
• 1:04:51
  Speaker 2: have something to gain from this wisdom, and some people
• 1:04:55
  Speaker 2: to use it as a three D to gain something
• 1:04:57
  Speaker 2: from it for money or power. But it's like there's
• 1:05:00
  Speaker 2: always something, and it's like when we realize that we
• 1:05:03
  Speaker 2: don't I don't have to go for the power within
• 1:05:05
  Speaker 2: myself anymore. I don't have to go And I say
• 1:05:08
  Speaker 2: power within myself with like the ego struggles and the
• 1:05:11
  Speaker 2: one to control and manipulate and all those things that
• 1:05:13
  Speaker 2: you can do and the three D. So that doesn't
• 1:05:16
  Speaker 2: that doesn't fulfill me. That's unfulfilling. I want to live
• 1:05:19
  Speaker 2: a fulfilled life. I want to live uh, just divinely guided.
• 1:05:25
  Speaker 2: I want to be in that, in that in all
• 1:05:26
  Speaker 2: those moments, you know, those moments we have them all
• 1:05:28
  Speaker 2: the time where we experience things that are like so
• 1:05:32
  Speaker 2: they feel like they're so far between that we don't
• 1:05:35
  Speaker 2: have them that often that it's like wow, Like I think,
• 1:05:38
  Speaker 2: I don't know if I told you about the client
• 1:05:40
  Speaker 2: that I had. I smelled roses on her and I
• 1:05:42
  Speaker 2: didn't say anything. And then I heard someone say, Mommy,
• 1:05:45
  Speaker 2: did I already tell you this? Oh? I hear a
• 1:05:48
  Speaker 2: woman's voice say mommy, And it sounds almost kind of digitally,
• 1:05:51
  Speaker 2: and I I'm peeking around, like trying to peek out
• 1:05:54
  Speaker 2: my curtain to see if there's someone outside, like trying
• 1:05:56
  Speaker 2: to rationalize this because I know it. I heard it
• 1:05:59
  Speaker 2: in my ears, but not out sight of my ears.
• 1:06:01
  Speaker 2: And then I'm like I and I said, if I
• 1:06:03
  Speaker 2: hear it again, I'll say something. But if I don't
• 1:06:05
  Speaker 2: hear it again, I'm not saying anything. So I don't
• 1:06:07
  Speaker 2: hear anything. She rolls over and I smell roses again.
• 1:06:11
  Speaker 2: I'm like, listen, do you have rose oil on or
• 1:06:15
  Speaker 2: rose lotion on or anything with roses? And she said no,
• 1:06:19
  Speaker 2: And I said, did your daughter? Because I already know
• 1:06:21
  Speaker 2: that her daughter had transitions as an adult, I said,
• 1:06:25
  Speaker 2: did your daughter ever call you mommy? And she says
• 1:06:28
  Speaker 2: she did when I was taking care of her when
• 1:06:31
  Speaker 2: she was dying of cancer. That's she never called me
• 1:06:34
  Speaker 2: that before that. And I thought, holy shit. And she
• 1:06:37
  Speaker 2: said and she loved roses, and I was like, what
• 1:06:40
  Speaker 2: the hell. But these are the excitement moments. And then
• 1:06:43
  Speaker 2: she says to me her birthdays in a couple of days.
• 1:06:46
  Speaker 2: I'm like, okay, and then she's like, I'm giving her
• 1:06:49
  Speaker 2: a hug and we were holding each other for a
• 1:06:51
  Speaker 2: super long time and then she just each looking at me.
• 1:06:53
  Speaker 2: I'm like and I'm thinking, I don't got nothing else
• 1:06:55
  Speaker 2: like that. That was it. That's all I got, Like,
• 1:06:58
  Speaker 2: I don't have anything else. Just that was just how
• 1:07:00
  Speaker 2: it came through or whatever came through. But it's the
• 1:07:03
  Speaker 2: exciting stuff like that. Those are the things that I
• 1:07:05
  Speaker 2: live for. What the nights that you have these amazing
• 1:07:08
  Speaker 2: experiences in your while you're sleeping and you wake up
• 1:07:11
  Speaker 2: and it's like, holy shit, like this stuff is so real,
• 1:07:14
  Speaker 2: moving things with your energy and which I know is possible.
• 1:07:18
  Speaker 2: I'm hearing people talk about it all the time. You
• 1:07:20
  Speaker 2: can find people on YouTube that are doing it. It's
• 1:07:23
  Speaker 2: not so unheard of. Just like making four or five
• 1:07:26
  Speaker 2: hundred thousand dollars a month, it's not so unheard of.
• 1:07:28
  Speaker 2: It's very possible. And that's what it's. So when you
• 1:07:32
  Speaker 2: hear someone talking about it, do you get excited about it?
• 1:07:35
  Speaker 2: Or when you hear them talking about do you feel
• 1:07:36
  Speaker 2: like it's taking you down? Like, oh, that's not happening
• 1:07:38
  Speaker 2: for me ever, And there's nothing wrong with that. It's
• 1:07:41
  Speaker 2: just a little trigger to let you know, this is
• 1:07:44
  Speaker 2: how you're feeling. This is just emotional feelings. You've got
• 1:07:46
  Speaker 2: some resistance to making that kind of money because you
• 1:07:49
  Speaker 2: don't think that you deserve it, you don't have the confidence.
• 1:07:54
  Speaker 2: So good, I know it's a lot, it's a lot,
• 1:07:57
  Speaker 2: everything's a lot, a lot. Today.
• 1:08:00
  Speaker 1: Could keep talking pride for time all day. We gonna
• 1:08:03
  Speaker 1: go all day.
• 1:08:05
  Speaker 2: Uh, it's true.
• 1:08:07
  Speaker 1: But just know that also along with all of that
• 1:08:09
  Speaker 1: when we started at the beginning, was the support is there.
• 1:08:14
  Speaker 1: It may not show up in physical form, but the
• 1:08:16
  Speaker 1: support is available to you if you choose to tap
• 1:08:20
  Speaker 1: into that higher self, higher consciousness, universe, God, angels, all
• 1:08:25
  Speaker 1: the things, and we are completely supported when that is
• 1:08:31
  Speaker 1: our focus. If you're focused on being unsupported, you are right.
• 1:08:34
  Speaker 1: If you're focused on being supported, you are right. So
• 1:08:38
  Speaker 1: either way, it's it's uh, it's just where we're going
• 1:08:42
  Speaker 1: to put our attention and bev hit on so many
• 1:08:46
  Speaker 1: good things. And we could seriously just keep talking for hours,
• 1:08:51
  Speaker 1: but this is We're going to leave you with these
• 1:08:54
  Speaker 1: these converse this conversation, and you can always come back
• 1:08:59
  Speaker 1: and visit us next week, or visit the four years
• 1:09:03
  Speaker 1: of content we've already put out there. We've talked about
• 1:09:07
  Speaker 1: it I'm sure it'd be quite interesting to go back
• 1:09:09
  Speaker 1: and see where we started to watch those videos again.
• 1:09:13
  Speaker 1: In fact, I've thought about putting clips, you know, the shorts,
• 1:09:16
  Speaker 1: putting some of those out from from back then. But anyway,
• 1:09:22
  Speaker 1: we come together to have these conversations because it's for us.
• 1:09:27
  Speaker 1: Bev and I are very selfish these conversations because we
• 1:09:29
  Speaker 1: know it's beneficial for us. It's part of our path,
• 1:09:33
  Speaker 1: our journey, are growing together and growing within ourselves. But
• 1:09:37
  Speaker 1: we also know it's beneficial for those that are that
• 1:09:40
  Speaker 1: are choosing to listen. So have the conversations, plant the seeds,
• 1:09:45
  Speaker 1: keep watching videos or content like this, keep reading the books,
• 1:09:51
  Speaker 1: and just being do better in yourself. That's my goal
• 1:09:55
  Speaker 1: each and every day, and it takes a lot of practice,
• 1:09:58
  Speaker 1: and I have a lot of part every single day
• 1:10:01
  Speaker 1: to do it. But you can find us here on
• 1:10:05
  Speaker 1: in YouTube, on Facebook, Google, podcast, podcast addict, iHeartRadio, so
• 1:10:13
  Speaker 1: many platforms where we are located, and either have the
• 1:10:18
  Speaker 1: conversations or share the content with your friends and family
• 1:10:22
  Speaker 1: or those that you feel would benefit from this information.
• 1:10:26
  Speaker 1: Any final words, ask for help, and it doesn't have
• 1:10:30
  Speaker 1: to be an outward verbal it can be just inside
• 1:10:33
  Speaker 1: asking for help and it will show up.
• 1:10:35
  Speaker 2: And then it's like it be excited about how things
• 1:10:37
  Speaker 2: are going to surprise and delight you.
• 1:10:38
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, for sure, and it's real. I will tell
• 1:10:43
  Speaker 1: you I've been living it, Bev's been living it. Then
• 1:10:46
  Speaker 1: when we ask, it shows up, and it shows up
• 1:10:51
  Speaker 1: a lot of times, it will show up not in
• 1:10:53
  Speaker 1: the way you thought it would, and so having to
• 1:10:55
  Speaker 1: be open to that as well being open to the
• 1:11:00
  Speaker 1: variety of ways it could show up, that's really important.
• 1:11:06
  Speaker 1: So just know you are supported and hold down to
• 1:11:10
  Speaker 1: that belief and keep moving forward. So with that, thank
• 1:11:14
  Speaker 1: you for hanging out with us, tea time with Amy
• 1:11:17
  Speaker 1: and Bev, and we'll see you next week.
• 1:11:19
  Speaker 2: Bye.