Latest / Jess Ask / Type A Challenges | with Desiree Danielle | EP60

Transcript

Type A Challenges | with Desiree Danielle | EP60 · Jess Ask

0:07
Yo, it's your girl, Jessica and Smith, and you already know that
0:10
you've entered the safe space for influencers to decompress, have fun and just ask
0:16
God for another Do you already know what it is? And then you know
0:20
it's about to get real. To be sure to show your girl the love
0:25
and like coming subscribe God for another day? Hey, hey, I know
0:32
we could be another way. Yeah, I'm ready. I'm gonna put this
0:39
down just a little bit. Get you look real grown, m you look
0:46
real grown, I look grown. Yeah. I can do whatever I will.
1:00
Girl. Yeah, it's still long. I see you, girl,
1:07
I see you? Okay? Who Father God the name of Jesus. Girl,
1:14
Like, I don't think people really understand how much energy this takes.
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Yeah, y'all, it takes a lot of energy. Yo, yo yo,
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yo yo yo. Oh. That wasn't a complaint, y'all. It's
1:27
just saying, Hey, today is recording day, and we recorded. We
1:34
He's recording and if you don't know where you've entered, you've entered and to
1:41
just ask the podcast where we create a safe space for influencers to decompress,
1:46
half fun and what just as just as girl Jessica s Smith, and I
1:51
have to give my girl her theme song every week. Des al right,
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hey all right, hey, alright, you're half a meal because you you,
2:01
you are the hype. Oh you are the hype. You are the
2:06
hype. Y'all. Y'all been seeing us in different locations. I want to
2:08
kind of tell y'all what's going on, because the thing is like y'all can't
2:12
unsee it, y'all. Really, the truth is, I think sometimes and
2:19
I'm learning in the Seventh Figure podcast community, sometimes we get like overly,
2:23
we overly analyze certain things a certain aspects and because I'm type A sometimes oh
2:30
Jesus, and I know they get on your nerves, does a ring?
2:34
Does? Go ahead, show me your face, so get on your nerves.
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They don't get on my nerves. I think the beautiful thing is,
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you know, as as you're as God is leading you to con uh community,
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as he's leading you to connections, like that's a part of the journey,
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Like you have to learn how to do life for people that's not like
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you. I was just thinking, I was just thinking about that this morning.
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I was like, God, I'm so grateful that one He's taking me
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through this process of delivering me from the fear of man, the opinions of
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people, and how he doing it. I don't like it, but it's
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hilarious to me because it's so outside of my comfort zone and it's it's it's
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allowing me to open up. And I was like, God, I'm so
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grateful that because what it's doing is it's it's hindering me from showing up as
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my own, as my authentic self. Right, So even as we do
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relationships, if we're not okay with who we are, you know, we're
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not showing up authentically for the people he's connecting us with. So you know,
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as I'm being free and delivered, it's allowing space for the people that
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he has connected me to. So Jessica is very type A. I'm just
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like, a, hey, you know, we here, we're going with
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the flow. Is good, it's great. She's like, oh my gosh,
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it's it's not the way I see it like, and I I am.
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I think this is just a whole transparent moment that I was gonna start
4:00
talking about something else, but let's just go here. So I only learned
4:05
that I'm Type A because I've been in situations that revealed that I was Type
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A and even more so, I'm not gonna I ain't gonna say no names,
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but I do serve Type A leaders So I expect what I am a
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part of, right, what I have to deliver from my leadership. That's
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what I all I can see. You know what I'm saying like that,
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that's all I can see. And so I'm in a space where it's like
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okay, because I'm always in my head thinking desire, like and I'm just
4:42
gonna talk to you. I'm always in my head thinking that am I am
4:49
I being as good to her as she is to me? What? Because?
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Yeah? And what does that have to do with Type A? If
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you keep listening, you'll find out what it has to do with It is
5:01
because Desiray has partnered with me on this journey. And can I say this
5:15
by how we operate? Sure? So does A Ray? When I say
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she's my purpose partner? Does A Ray is invested in this? Like genuinely
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without funds? For just ask this was the platform that she chose to sew
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into that she chooses continuously to show so and it's not just her recording,
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no, she this ain't just a recording. This is like I'm invested.
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I am, and I feel like when I'm about to cry, Jesus,
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I'm invested. I am. I want to see us grow, right,
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because the moment I can start sowing back into her or doing whatever, you
6:11
know, financially for her, that's what I'm gonna do. And so that's
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I Even the moments where I feel like I'm about to give up, I
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have to remember that I'm not the only one that's invested in this. And
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that's probably why God sent you. Wow, because it's easy to give up
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when it was just you. Yeah, because it's easy to give up on
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myself. But now you got investment in this. Now you got some some
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some fuel in the fire with this. And if I give up, then
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I'm saying I wasted Like I literally I feel like I'm saying I wasted your
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time. And what this has to do with type A is Type A is
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just not like, oh, I want I want it to look this type
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of way. I want to look this type of way. Blah blah blah.
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It's really, Hey, if I can't pay them, they're not gonna
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do it. Or scared of being afraid to ask for him or being afraid
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to you know, just take people at their word because in your mind,
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you know this is and this is all a part of a personality that I've
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experienced. You might not experience this, but I've experienced. So I want
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everything perfect. I don't want just the same. I guess what'd you call
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it? An atmosphere or aesthetics. That's the word I'm looking for. I
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don't It's not just making sure that I say the right thing. It's not
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just any of that. It's what's happening on behind the scenes and behind the
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scenes. Something that I'm type a about is wanting does a rate of thrive
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because she decided to invest in something that God told me to obey on.
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And I feel sometimes I feel guilty about that for wanting to be successful.
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I wouldn't have I wouldn't pose it like that. I think I would pose
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it like for one thing to give to somebody that's given to me so much.
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And so where's the where's the guilt in that that I'm I'm not able
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to do it right now, not the way I want to do it.
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You've told me. Now, I gotta get we gotta bring this up because
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I don't know how many people I don't know. We're like, we always
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do this, we don't do scripts, we don't do well, and it's
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just literally just came up, you know what I'm saying. So this is
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a real authentic conversation that y'all getting right now, because she's like, why
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are you I said, I'll say, so it came up because so as
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she mentioned before, you may notice the scenes are changing. The scenes are
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changing because when we started, well, first she started at home in her
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office. So then when I came on and we started partnering together, we
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were I was in a studio, so I've transitioned out of the studio into
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a space where I live. Here is actually my apartment property that has amenities
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and spaces for the residents to be able to use, you know, like
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offices and stuff like that. So, which was one of the main reasons
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that that I chose to come here because I knew I was gonna be transitioning
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from that space as I was being prepared for the for the next one.
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But I have currently right now three projects, and I had already mapped out
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where I wanted to do each project based on you know who they was,
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their personality, and based on the aesthetic that I had saw in my mind.
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So she's not the only one that had a certain vision. I had
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already mapped it out. But I think the thing that Jessica's learning, and
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I think that she's gonna continue to learn. I don't necessarily think there's anything
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wrong with like who you are, Like if there's a type of personality,
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there is therefore a reason, like it's not a mistake or anything like that.
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I think the less comes in how do you learn to respond to situations
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when situations aren't what you have expected? Right, So there's two there's two
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low casts. So remember I said I had three projects, and there's out
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of three, out of two of those three locations, I can't use them
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because one there's audio in one room that can't be adjusted. And two they
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made a policy change in one of the spaces, and so now it's not
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a free space, it's a it's a space that now has to be depositive,
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which is not which is not a problem, but not understand you know,
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the shifting change. But I just there was just kind of like a
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lack of communication kind of thing about it. And so we've had to I've
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had to adjust. So I'm like, Okay, as long as I still
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have a space to provide a space for you know, my family people to
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come in and still be able to create and push out what it is,
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I'm good. But you know that I just had to be okay with it
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not looking how originally I saw it looking, you know. And so we're
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in this space today because the space that we were in last week the door
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broke. I've gotten locked in this office like twice, you know, and
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the doors because the door is open, you can hear the sound and the
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people coming in and they're constantly you know, showing the spaces and stuff like
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that that I add. And so now we're in a different location, and
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so you know, I it's not what I've envisioned originally. But my thing
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is, you know, I'm still grateful to be able to provide the space
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because at the end of the day, we can we can have a certain
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look or whatever, but people, the truth of the matter is people are
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listening for the content, you know, and if and sometimes we can get
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caught up in the lookover thing. If I had to pull my cell phone
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out and record this to get this message across, that's what I would have
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done to be honest, I've invested a lot and the equipment and the cameras
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to give a lovely viewing and hearing experience. But at the end of the
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day, if I needed to pull this good old iPhone out to do what
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we had to do, then that's what I would do, and to make
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it look the best that I could, just because that's I understand at the
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end of the day. Sometimes you know, we can't get caught up in
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the the risaldousands of the things. But I'm just still grateful to be a
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part of this platform because I know God told me to help the help her,
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which means He's given each and every one of us, honestly, a
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message. He's given us something that we're supposed to deposit in this earth.
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And sometimes you may need just a little help to keep going. Right with
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all those days that you feel like giving up. You know, now you
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realize it's not just about you. It's bigger than you, and it's not
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even just about me. You know, her wanting to bless back into me
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and not give up on me. She can't she now can't give up on
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you guys like you guys are invested. You know what I'm saying, so,
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y'all, just keep pushing, just just to keep going, even on
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those days where you know she may not want to. Notw you over that
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crying. Why are you crying, Jessica? You can use my blanket.
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I ain't gonna be mad. You can use my blanking. I'm trying not
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to cry out, but I'm crying. I didn't even like this. This
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is why I don't do script this stuff. I want to be authentic as
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possible because the type aim part of me is like girl, they always seeing
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you crying on your podcast. If you don't like it, just click off.
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To be honest. What what got me crying was when you said is
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if I had to record this on my iPhone, I would. What that
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tells me is that the you're even more invested than I even thought you were
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not because and this is the thing, y'all, this is why because we
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haven't been silent or apologetic about our relationship with God. This, y'all,
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I'm trying not to cry because when I cry sound like a man. You're
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a cute man, don't jest? You still kill though, and stop apologizing
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for crying. I wanted to say the N word, but ain't gonna say
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anything, nigga, stop apologizing for crying. Let's borrowings. We want to
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hold all this stuff and you better let that out this podcast because my makeup
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today it is she got the lastes on every thing. If I'm really honest,
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the more and more I go in this whole podcast content creation things,
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the more fear tries to come up on me, because I y'all looking at
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some people are looking at me like, oh my god, you're doing a
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dog But I'm looking at my people that I admired, and I'm in the
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gap. I'm in the gap. I'm I am in the middle of it,
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you know. And so while I'm getting the hay I'm proud of you,
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I'm also getting hey, this is what you can do? Da da
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da, And so that balance the type A heres what I could do better
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more than the praise that's so good. The type A hearing gets the understanding
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of there's always more to do, and so I don't get to settle in
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the fact that what I've done well on you get what I'm saying. So
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I don't know who this is resonating with, but I'm just telling you that
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I'm in it. I am in it, and I'm learning how to.
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That's like, as far as creativity and being weird and loving the Lord,
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being desiray are on the same boat. But when it comes to things going
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the way I see it and her flexibility, I'm flexible with everybody else because
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I got to be. But when it comes to me and the way I
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want to show up in the world, because I'm gonna be transparent at some
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point. I always tell people this. I do not play about my name.
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Okay, there's every things I don't play with. I don't play about
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God, I don't play about my money, and I do not play about
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my name. Okay, what does that mean? Your name? My name
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is which people say to you. My name is my brand. Now.
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I didn't even want to brand my name. I wanted to I wanted to
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keep my page private. I wanted to do all this because exposures give you
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another level of people to be able to judge you or look at you crazy
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and all that stuff like that. I was just like, you know,
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I don't I don't know if I want to do that, Like, why
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would you want me to do that? Let me be, let me be
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sickon, let me be in the bad let me be, let me stay
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at me and let me you know, people can know that, Oh that's
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the redhead girl that's serving coach D. I can be that. Yeah,
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let me stay over there, you know. But now as I really feel
17:30
like I'm in a place where I can't go back, even if, like
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even if the feelings arise that I want to go back, go backwards,
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right back into a hiding place, I can't that. Just I just thought
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about last week what PG said. It was as he talked about the remembrance
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you know, he remembered, it was he was more so talking about the
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remembers of the transformation that he had been through. Can they see you sorry?
17:59
Be forgetting? He was talking about the remembrance of the transformation that he
18:03
had kind of that he had been through. He couldn't forget that, which
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which was why he had to ask God to help him not go back.
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And I think that's the thing, like it's we can go back, but
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what are we going back to? You know what I'm saying, like,
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at this point anywhere in your journey, if you really look back, like
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you're not the same person you were, you know, a month ago,
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a year ago, two years ago. So it's kind of like, what
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do you want to go back to? Though, Like you want to go
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back to you know, for me, as as as as we talk,
18:34
the Lord has been in his own kind of way delivering me from the fear
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of man, and he's been doing it in his own kind of way,
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which is kind of embarrassing. But now I'm at the now to that,
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and this is a situation that just happened, you know, very recently,
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so now on today, I'm like, I don't even want to go back
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to that person, you know what I'm saying, Like, I don't want
18:56
to go back to that person because I knew the mindset that was there has
19:00
shifted even even this soon, and I'm like, wow, I can see
19:04
the transformation. I can see the difference. I don't want to go back
19:07
to that, even though that was comfortable because that's what I knew at the
19:08
time, I don't want to go back to that. So you can't.
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So we can't go back. I mean you can, but I mean not
19:15
really, because you're not even the same because you've been exposed to too much.
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And I'm just being transparent, I'm not going back and I'm definitely not
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saying that and I'm not gonna stop just as the podcast. I really do
19:26
believe that people just being able to see that's this is. And I'm gonna
19:30
tell I'm gonna talk to the viewers because I used to you know, I
19:36
probably used to have a time where I was like, oh, you know,
19:38
everybody just coming on. They stuff. It's a popularity thing. And
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I'm learning that I have to ask myself, why do I want the numbers?
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Right? For one, the numbers and I'm just gonna make it plain
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and simple for your eys. The numbers allow the corporations to see that we
20:00
have something. And that's the business part of it. Like you get the
20:04
benefit of listening every week, and all we're asking you to do is share
20:11
light, come it, subscribe. What does that do? The subscribes and
20:15
the and the analytics. The more you do that, it positions us to
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where I can pay, I can pay, desiray. I'm just gonna keep
20:23
it. I don't know why I'm here and Palm being this transparent, but
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the likes, the comings, the subscribe, the subscribe, it positions me
20:30
into the point where this is not a hobby anymore. This becomes a whole
20:34
business. I am making investments and this is not I'm not frustrated. I'm
20:37
proud of my business. Baby, seven fifty podcasts with the best in busines
20:41
when I could have made and myself. Okay, it provided me a level
20:45
of confidence, It provided me a level of strategy. I was researching a
20:48
lot of this stuff myself. Then when Desiray came on, she took a
20:52
load off of me, like trying to not only be the mastermind of the
20:56
content but editing, making sure I sound like all. That was a weightlifted.
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You get what I'm saying. So now I can just focus on the
21:06
creativity part finding guests. When I ask y'all for these things, I want
21:11
to give you guys because y'all, y'all investing in y'all's time, in y'all's
21:15
ears, and y'all's energy into something that we're doing. It's not even I
21:19
an't think like just it might say just as the podcast, but Desiraate is
21:22
my it's my team. That's it's just us right now. And so when
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we say, hey, share Collins surprise, it ain't all trying to be
21:30
big and famous. I can stay I can stay irrelevant. I'm just gonna
21:33
let y'all know that I can really stay irrelevant. I'm that type of person
21:37
I'm at church that my pastor told me. He said, well, she
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said, Jessica, You're the type that could stay in the background and don't
21:47
ever have to touch the mic, be hearing from the Lord, and you
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you're You're good. You're good because you're seeing the Lord move. That's what
21:53
That's why I keep doing this, because I'm seeing the Lord move. If
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I'm really transparent, that's the that's about the only that's about Sometimes, that's
22:03
about the only only thing that pushes me. Because I love God enough to
22:07
be uncomfortable. I love God enough to be stretched. I love God enough
22:11
to do to do what's necessary for the kingdom, even if it's something I
22:17
never imagine me doing. I never imagine me being a content creator. I
22:21
never imagine me being a podcaster. Now, I might be lying as far
22:25
as like the fame, right, and what I mean fame is being well
22:30
known. I'm not famous now, not at this current state. Do I
22:34
believe that that's gonna come? Yes? Why because I've been shown that.
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I'm not saying that. I'm not saying that in an arrogant way. I
22:45
want you to hear my heart on this because sometimes we as Kingdom people,
22:48
and I've heard Darius Daniels exquisitely say this, So I love that man.
22:52
If I could get him on the platform, my God. But I've heard
22:56
him talk about if we if we're you know, pushing the kingdom, and
23:00
we are, you know, for the Kingdom, why wouldn't we want to
23:04
be famous because we we're representations of the Kingdom. He didn't probably he's probably
23:10
said a little better than me, but like, but basically that's the synopsis
23:14
of it. My the mentor that I do look up to in the in
23:17
the podcast realm. I've been paying attention. I've been studying him even the
23:22
more and the more I pay attention to him, I can see the biblical
23:26
principles coming out. I literally just found out, girl in an interview that
23:30
I watched. They really pissed me off. But I'm not even gonna go
23:33
there in an interview that I watch. And if you don't know who my
23:36
mentor, my podcast mentor is, one of them is David Shean's and that's
23:40
who I'm talking about. He said on his platform, the man was mad
23:45
at him because he brought up that he prayed twice a day. I think
23:53
I think it's two times a day. It's like nine am. Is something
23:56
else that ain't got nothing to do with me. I'm just thankful that the
23:59
Man of God prayed because that tells me that he said he's in the same
24:03
kingdom. I man, I don't that's that. Ain't what time he prayed?
24:07
What a lot of people need to set updates for God. That's what.
24:10
That's what I heard. A lot of people need to set updates for
24:12
God. And that's what a person that I look up to is doing.
24:17
And the reason why I would even want to push and promote him. The
24:21
way that I want to push and promote him is not just because he's a
24:23
man of intelligence, because I've been following him for a while. But now
24:27
I thank you Holy Spirit. I'm about to break it down like this.
24:30
So you got fans, you got followers, and you got disciples. The
24:37
reason the I'm gonna say that again fans, followers, and disciples. I
24:41
was a fan right because I was like, oh, he got a pretty
24:44
cool situation going on. Then I became a follower. I was like,
24:48
let me, I'm picking in. I'm picking in and then after the after
24:52
the after the summit, I became a disciple. What do disciples do?
24:56
They go and tell what they're learning. Yeah, they go be the expression
25:02
and the example of what they they they got. As as there as I'm
25:07
intaking, I am depositing. I want to say that again, as I'm
25:11
in disciples, they intake the information and then go out and deposit it,
25:15
whether they do it for themselves, normally, doing it for a community,
25:19
normally that're trying to spread the word. Like his passion and the things that
25:23
he's done for me personally, I can't speak for nobody else, but what
25:29
he's done for me, the intelligence that he walks in for me, the
25:32
way that he loves his wife, What I get to see, what I
25:36
get to experience. There's a clip I'm probably gonna end up posting that I
25:38
have from last year that he was dancing with his daughter. That is what
25:42
I am attracted to. You can have the fame, you can have all
25:47
that. It's a lot of these supposed job follow that I don't follow.
25:49
I am disinterested. I am so. I am so not forward. Why
25:55
because there's no substance there? And so now becoming a disciple has given brought
26:00
me close closer, I ain't close. I ain't Finnah act like me and
26:03
Coach Dave be out here eating Philip Cheese stays together even though he make them.
26:08
Phil the cheese stays at so good. I'm gonna go while we're in
26:12
at Wana. But what he has can stand alone, right, And so
26:26
I'm in between this space as a content creator of seeing great great people like
26:32
Coach Dave. Like Coach Dave, y'all just had a moment, adhd moment.
26:41
I know because I got distracted because we're in the news place. But
26:45
I get into a space where I'm like, Okay, there are people that
26:51
see me and that watch like they're doing so good. And I'm not saying
26:55
that Coach Dave because he gives me accolades, but he's also pushing us,
26:59
right. And it's interesting that we recently just we have these meetups or whatever
27:03
on the seventy figure podcast and we meet up on Fridays, and so that
27:08
we have they do a message, So they go over something real quick and
27:12
then they allow us to ask questions, right, And so I don't know
27:18
what triggered this this message with Coach CJ. He mentioned and I love him
27:23
like he he cut through, y'all. He cut thought and right now,
27:29
y'all. Just in my mind, I'm just expressing myself right now, y'all.
27:32
So I mean, I'm trying to be as transparent. That's what y'all
27:36
seemed to like. And I need it. I need it right now.
27:42
So Coach CJ was and this was so good. Girl, you feel you
27:45
feel a flull? Okay, So he says that, uh, he called
27:52
calls I think he called the type a people spreadsheet millionaires to where if it's
27:59
not on this bridge yet, if it's not basically planned out, it can't
28:03
be done right. So we're not moving with the time, we're not moving
28:07
with the different circumstances. And he says what has made him him successful,
28:12
what has made coach Day successful, what has made et successful, is that
28:18
they they go in knowing that something that there's gonna be a failure somewhere.
28:23
They're expecting failure, They're expecting something to change, they're expecting to be unexpected.
28:29
Right. And he uses this example of he said most people think that,
28:33
he said, most people ask why bridges aren't thirty. He said,
28:37
if you go on the bridge, you will see that it's it's it sways
28:40
a little bit right, And he said the reason why is because the conditions
28:44
of the weather. If it was thirty, it would be easier to you
28:48
know, diminish. But because it has some loose in it, it can
28:52
sway and whatever it needs to go through, it can endure. It can
28:57
endure. They'll those moments and it hit me like a ton of bridge because
29:03
even in the place I thought, like even right now, I was like
29:07
I thought I was, you know, being a bridge. If like I'm
29:11
thinking that I'm being that bridge. But in all actuality, when I'm putting
29:15
a space where we having to change rooms, I'm being frustrated about being able
29:21
to be consistent with the content or whatever, and not just realizing that I'm
29:26
being consistent with the content. If I'm like I'm talking about I'm talking about,
29:30
oh, well we in this room, in this room. And I'm
29:33
gonna tell y'all why this is an analyst because type eight people, when they
29:37
learn something, they're gonna stick to it. There's no flexibility with it.
29:41
It's like, oh no, I gotta do it that way to the point
29:44
where and I'm about to be so transparent. So one of the things that
29:45
we learned in the in the podcast community was and this is on the I
29:53
guess the what you call it the workflow or the the videos that we have
30:00
to watch because watch videos to learn and then we meet up to ask questions
30:03
about the videos to watch. So I'm giving y'all a tea because you know,
30:07
and if y'all interested, just DM me. I'll probably put the link
30:11
to the Seventh Figure podcast on here. But they operate like that, right,
30:18
And so I'm trying to figure out what was going with it because I
30:22
forgot what was it what I said before that you were talking about? Oh
30:25
why they why I was bringing it up? So and one of them they
30:29
brought up the fact that, okay, be consistent with your background, your
30:33
lighting, how is set up? You know what I'm saying. And so
30:36
it's like, okay, so people can know what they're coming to. And
30:41
I got that stuck in my mind. I was like, because CJ said,
30:45
Coach CJ said it, because Car Coach Car said it, because Coach
30:49
Dave said it, I gotta do it. Yeah, even to the point
30:53
where even my content I was starting, I was starting to think. I
30:57
was like, my countent is not because it's not what Coach Day do.
31:02
I never said that to you. I fought against that. And one thank
31:06
God, because what's getting me on that platform right now is not me doing
31:10
what Coach Day did, is being inspired by what he taught me to do
31:14
to escate Q in my lane. But that's a whole other conversation, right
31:18
So I got so stuck up in one one detail, y'all. This is
31:23
a detail. And as I'm talking you guys, I'm freeing myself. This
31:29
is how I talk to myself. Y'all hearing me talk to myself right now,
31:32
as I'm talking to myself, I'm free of myself because the same way
31:34
I took that concept of like, I'm not an entrepreneur, I don't know
31:38
all of this stuff. I don't this is not my lane, Like that's
31:42
not If you've been paying attention to just As the podcast, you will realize
31:48
that we changed our saying. We changed our saying from just As the podcast
31:52
where we create a safe space for creators and entrepreneurs to decompress. No,
31:57
we changed the influences. Why why did I change that? Because I had
32:01
to, Really, the Lord kept telling me, you are you, you
32:05
influence the influencer. And I said, God, what does that mean.
32:07
I'm not even influenced. How so I'm an influence, an influencer and I'm
32:12
not an influencer. And he was like, that's a lie. That is
32:15
a lie. I'm an influence in my own lane. And God, God
32:20
literally highlighted, highlighted and said, hey, people, people are influencers,
32:25
whether they influence the person A and person B or just one of them,
32:31
because they're doing something for them in the lane that they're in that they're progressing
32:36
in. I'll never be able to influence a shelf because guess what, I'm
32:40
not no sheelf. I'm trying to not burn biscuit for my TikTok people,
32:45
I'm not trying to burn biscuits. I can't influence you in the in the
32:51
kitchen, but what I can do is influence you in your heart because I
32:55
know that I'm doing some heart work, I'm doing some mind work, I'm
32:58
doing some healing. I know I want to get to the harder people and
33:00
be a safe place for people that because I felt at one point I felt
33:06
like I was I didn't have a safe space. I didn't have a place
33:08
where I could just go and say, okay, this just like y'all.
33:14
Y'all saw me talking to my pastor. Hey, I'm a single woman and
33:19
it's hard to stay killed. Okay, it's hard to be out in these
33:22
streets and just hold it down. I want to be that. I want
33:24
to be there, and it's scary to be that, y'all because you don't
33:28
know the responses that you're gonna get from y'all. To be honest, you
33:31
don't know what's gonna be shared. You think you got to get all these
33:34
high profile people to be able to have a voice. Which is that?
33:37
Which which that is good? And I just you know, I love the
33:40
interviews that we've been able to do so far, and I'm not interviewing nobody
33:45
that I I feel like it's just not gonna bring that, whether they high
33:49
profile or not. You know what I'm saying. Some of the people that
33:51
I bring on the platform, you may not know, but you're gonna you're
33:53
gonna get a good word. You're gonna get any good interview if it don't
33:55
make sense. You're not just coming on a platform just because I need a
34:00
guess. You see, it's me and desiated a Yep, it this is
34:07
not what this is for, right, And so what does that mean for
34:09
you? That? What does that mean for you? If your type A
34:14
like me, we have some opportunities, right, And I'm gonna let Desiate
34:17
talk to the type people that she be talking to. You know what I'm
34:21
saying this she is if you're a type A person and a creative I'm gonna
34:25
specifically talk to my type A creative people because when it's not like you see
34:32
it, when it's not like you want it, but it's what God wants,
34:37
that's got to be enough. That has to be enough, y'all.
34:45
Y'all saw me in the beginning, like literally not even twenty thirty minutes ago,
34:49
how long we been recording, uh thirty four, not even twenty minutes
34:53
ago, I was crying. I was I was literally crying, saying,
35:00
you know, I feel some type of way. But now that I'm talking,
35:02
talking it out loud, you know, this thing is starting to heal
35:07
me in a place, you know what I'm saying. And so I have
35:09
to realize, just as does a race said, that I'm still doing what
35:15
I'm supposed to do, even though it's not the way I wanted to look
35:20
right now, and that was the whole point of what coach, Coach CJ
35:23
and coach Dave were saying, even to the point where last year, even
35:29
when we started, I don't know which one of them said this. I
35:31
think it might've been Coach CJ. It's like if you he's adamant about,
35:36
like, Okay, if you're gonna do virtual, do virtual. If you're
35:38
gonna do if you're gonna do in person, do in person. It's some
35:43
people that's like, oh, I want to do virtual. I was like,
35:46
I don't know. I don't know, fam, I don't know because
35:50
my coach And this is why my coach said that I shouldn't I shouldn't do
35:54
that. Then the last one, coach Dave. Somebody asked a question about
35:59
virtual. Somebody think somebody was new. Someone asked a question about having virtual
36:04
people versus the in person or whatever. Now I'm gonna tell you this.
36:10
Coach CJ was adamant about it for the simple fact of the quality. And
36:15
I want to be spised because y'all not gonna come for my coach. And
36:17
I don't think he care either anyway. He a dog, He's a dog.
36:22
So he said that, But for the quality, because if you're putting
36:27
excellence out like we got quality work. If you're gonna look at my old
36:30
work, it was trash. You know what I mean. Before Deserlray,
36:32
I wasn't getting it. You might. You might get a video. You're
36:37
gonna get some audio. You're gonna get some audio. The audio is good,
36:43
but you ain't getting no video, okay, and so and when you
36:49
got video it was trash. So he was saying that because everybody's not taking
36:52
themselves seriously as serious as you as a podcaster. You got the equipment or
36:58
whatever, they're not you know, doing it, and so unless we're sending
37:00
out stuff to sending them, it's just not working. Literally. Coach Day
37:06
told us the other day, and I'm giving y'all these gyms because I want
37:07
y'all what's in my head and how how people that are able to be flexible
37:14
can maneuver this way? He said, I'm seeing something. He said,
37:17
I try. I did a virtual interview the other day. He said,
37:20
it did numbers. He was like, it did better than my live interviews
37:23
that I've done before. He said, And I think I don't know if
37:25
it's because how COVID has transitioned our the way we do things. I don't
37:30
know what's going on, but he said, I used to think. I
37:34
used to think that everything had to be done in the studio, but now
37:37
I'm changing my mind. Coach Day, you want to do that? To
37:43
do that, And he just gave me permission to be flexible on my platform
37:46
because I was telling for I ain't gonna lie to get I was telling vote
37:50
u uh, if you can't come, if you ain't got the quality,
37:52
if you ain't got this, if you ain't got that. And he did
37:54
say, he was like, you will want to make sure that they have,
37:58
you know, some decent equipment. And maybe that's something I could talk
38:00
to my guests too through. So if you're not in the city, this
38:04
your this is an open invitation. If you can't get to burmeiare. I
38:07
would prefer to you being in Birmingham, but we are open to virtual encounters
38:13
now. Because he had to, I won't say he had to, but
38:16
that helped me be more comfortable doing it as an option because he's seen the
38:24
change. So what does that tell me, Jessica? Be flexible as long
38:30
as you're doing the content, as long as you and I don't know who
38:34
this is for I feel it so strongly. You gotta get out of your
38:37
own way. I have to tell myself that every single day, Jessica,
38:46
get out of your own way. Tell state your name and say, get
38:52
out of your own way. What does that look like? Am I accomplishing
38:59
the what God told me to do? Yes? Yes, the answer is
39:07
yes, I'm accomplishing it, just as is accomplishing it right? And so
39:12
what do you have to do? You have to really get into the nitty
39:15
gritty of what God is taking because sometimes we add and or subtract from what
39:22
God told us to do based on how it's being done. Yeah, we
39:29
really, we really put ourselves in a position where we set ourselves up a
39:34
failure. God ain't set us of a failure. We set ourselves up for
39:38
failure because we can't be flexible enough in the vision we stick to it.
39:45
We say, hey, now, boundaries, let them be boundaries like I'm
39:50
not I'm not. It's certain things on the platform I'm just not gonna do.
39:53
I can't, I can't think about it like I'm not doing my platform
39:58
with God. Desertray a bouncer, I'm so kick that is a that's the
40:02
boundary. I can think of right now. But I think that as type
40:08
A people that can resonate with me, especially Type A creators, when we're
40:15
not flexible, we really, we really can miss out on the blessings of
40:20
God. We can really miss out on the advancement of God, even even
40:24
much so. And I know y'all about sicking of me, but I don't
40:27
care even much. So with the tab with the Brown situation, I never
40:31
moderated before, especially on no Book. I had never done that before.
40:37
But I had to be flexible enough to think that I could do that.
40:43
She thought I was gonna be good, and I end up being good,
40:45
you know what I'm saying, Like, I end up being good. So
40:49
so for what do you you call your type people? Uh, desertaate,
40:52
type B type. I don't know. I just know what I'm learning is
41:00
if we say God is a creator, right, I think even even with
41:05
the you know, kind of like type A, type B type blah blah
41:09
blah, you know, I think sometimes we just get to where we we
41:14
limit God to what he can do and what he want to do in our
41:16
lives because we only see it one way. But if he's a creator,
41:22
he can create multiple ways for one situation if we allow him to. And
41:28
I think that's where I am is I had to take myself out of a
41:30
box one because in my mind, even though I said I never was going
41:35
to do hair for a living, I took on that identity fully, like
41:40
I'm just a hairstylist. So me just being a hairstyles that's the only way
41:45
I was allowing myself to operate. So as I taught it started to step
41:50
back and really just you know, leaning to God and grow and allow him
41:54
to show me who he is. He's opening up more things and gift things
42:01
and skills that I really didn't know was in there until I made a decision
42:06
to just let them flow. And so being a creative, I've always been
42:12
in a creative space, but in this season, I'm just learning that I
42:17
need a type a Jessica because I can be a little free flowing sometimes,
42:24
you know, and just kind of go with the flow and be like,
42:25
Okay, well it's done. But because I've been connected with Jessica, my
42:30
mindset now is I can't control what I can't control. I can't control that,
42:34
Hey, you know that room is a dumb deposit or I keep getting
42:38
locked in this room and now we've got to keep the door open and we
42:40
keep hearing people. Now we got to move to another room. I can't
42:43
control that, But what I can control is how I still show up in
42:45
excellence, you know, making sure that the thing that I can control,
42:50
the things that I can do, that I am doing it to the best
42:52
of my ability and really showing God in that. So that's with anything,
42:57
really, like we can't get upset. And I think that's where like the
43:00
anxieties and the frustrations come in at is because things things have happened and they're
43:06
out of my control and it's unfortunate. But okay, so what do we
43:10
do from now? Like, how do you how you respond to that?
43:14
I believe it's what God is looking at, which is our heart posture.
43:16
Yeah, you know what I'm saying. And so that's just kind of where
43:19
I am. And I'm not perfect at it because sometimes I get frustrated about
43:22
stuff too, but I'm just like, Okay, Lord, so what do
43:25
I do now? And I just go with that, Like I think you
43:30
just have to just continue to remind yourself, like just like you said,
43:32
I am doing what God has called me to do. Even though it does
43:36
not look how I envisioned it. Okay, cool, but I am still
43:39
showing up and I'm still showing up in excellence like you still showing up in
43:43
excellence and still giving everything that was in your heart to give. Yeah,
43:50
yeah, And it comes from a place of it can look like people please
43:54
and all that good stuff like that. But at this point, I think
43:58
I'm coming to a place like if y'all, if y'all like it, y'all
44:01
like it. If y'all don't cool, like it's it's cool. And so
44:08
I know it sounded like a whole rent today, but I I I think
44:15
that it was a real needed conversation when you were talking. And I'm in
44:19
right here. There is a creator and a genius man of God by the
44:27
name of Omar, and I'm not about to try to pronounce it how you
44:37
who il to Corey Il to Corey. That's you might be right, because
44:39
that's how you spell it. But I'm just gonna buy phonics. Uh huh
44:44
Omar alta Corey. If you don't follow him, please do, oh my
44:46
gosh. And if you're familiar with think media, he's a part of that
44:52
that collaborative, right that's where I started started following him from Yeah, so
44:57
dere's a ray Ben following him. I met him at the podcast summer last
45:00
year. And the reason why I started following him is because during his presentation
45:07
he announced that he was a pastor, and it blew my mind because I
45:13
was like, like, you walking in this much It's like people were flipping
45:17
out seeing this man, Like I didn't know who he was. So I
45:21
was like, why are they flipping out? And I went told him,
45:23
I said, Hey, I didn't know who you were before today, and
45:25
now I'm following you. But I'm not following you because of the gadgets and
45:30
the light and all this stuff. Like I'm following you because you announced that
45:34
you were a man of God and that the gilts that you are living in
45:38
now, the benefits that you're living in is because what you sold into your
45:44
church family. But that's a whole nother conversation. I pray to God.
45:47
I pray to God that I'll get to interview. Yeah, I want to
45:52
so bad. So recently, probably about the beginning of this year, Instagram
45:59
his Instagram crashed, No, his Instagram got hacked, got hacked, okay,
46:04
and even to the point where his his his profile picture still ain't no.
46:08
No, that's how bad it got bad. Right. Well, luckily
46:13
enough he had done the business thing or whatever, going to get the emails
46:15
or whatever. So the people that were on his email list are still getting
46:19
great information. But for a period of time he was not showing up on
46:23
Instagram. He would because he wasn't able to. Right. And on one
46:29
of the calls that we were on, I think it was that free webinar
46:31
that he did, he announced how frustrated that was. He announced how frustrated
46:37
it was to do it. But guess y'all, this is why we got
46:40
to do what we're supposed to do. He still had thousands of people on
46:45
this call. What he was talking about was he wasn't able to promote so
46:51
like the normal business thing to do. Oh shoot, okay, I remember,
46:54
okay, thank you. You don't even have to tell you. I
46:57
was about about thank you. Think she'd be like. The thing that he
47:02
was talking about was he wasn't able to promote it like he wished she could
47:07
have because his his Instagram was hacked. Right, And this is what I
47:12
had been thinking about. If you are a being a kingdom influencer. Right,
47:17
there is a thin line that we have to find our that we find
47:22
ourselves in what is normal for business and entrepreneurship. What the world say you
47:25
should be doing for marketing and advertising while we need the numbers x Y and
47:29
Z versus know what God? What did God say? Right? So if
47:32
if we put all his time, all this investment into this, this podcast
47:37
platform and only one person saw it, yeah, Like to the world,
47:42
that's a failure, But to God, that's everything right because he left the
47:45
ninety nine to go get the one he did, right, And so if
47:49
if your assignment is just to put this out for that one person, you
47:52
still have to be satisfied with that, that's so good, you know what
47:54
I'm saying. And that's what he was saying. He was like, man,
47:57
I wasn't able to promote it in X Y and Z, Like I
47:59
know I could have to really get the numbers in X y Z because that's
48:01
what it's normal. But at the end of the day, because he still
48:05
showed up to do what what he was called to do, it was still
48:07
sold out. Listen that that comes up because he could have really given up
48:15
in that moment. He could have he really could have been like, Okay,
48:21
I it's not working the way I wanted to do. And it makes
48:24
me think because he's still showing up with a pictureless image as a profile picture,
48:30
Like if you don't, if you wouldn't already follow me, you may
48:32
think it's one of them spamounts. It's not a spam. Like he's still
48:37
being able to you know, I don't know what he's working out with Instagram,
48:40
but they I don't and I don't even understand, you know, how
48:45
it happened. But I know that even in the midst of that, he's
48:47
pushing through. And so if he can do that, and he can move
48:54
the way he needs to move and just and still this and this is this
48:58
is the thing. He literally started his podcast. He announced his podcast right
49:02
after the podcast, so he hasn't been doing this a full year. And
49:07
if we're in the Kingdom, we already know that there's an attack that was
49:12
a whole attack, that was a wole attack, you know what I'm saying.
49:16
And so if we know this, if we know that we don't fight
49:21
against flesh, and but we know that we don't fight against the natural,
49:23
we know that we fight in the spiritual ram and this is not just in
49:27
church, This is not just in quote unquote spiritual atmosphere he is. He's
49:31
doing and being who he is all the time. This is something he said,
49:35
y'all, not if last final thought. I'm gonna leave you with a
49:39
final thought. Okay, we know we're talking about type A people or whatever.
49:43
If I ain't said nothing else, I want you to hear this.
49:46
On his one that I think it was one of his first episodes. The
49:52
question was he said, he brought up the fact that he was like,
49:54
I have a people that come to me, people that come to me asking
50:00
me how do I balance kingdom and marketplace? And his answer was there's no
50:07
balance. I show I am Kingdom and I am marketplace. I am I
50:14
am that I am, like the Lord said about himself, I am that
50:16
I am. And so if we're showing up to these places, it's no
50:22
Oh, excuse, excuse you, Jesus. We hold up on one second.
50:25
I gotta go. I gotta talk to the people. Oh you talking
50:28
about my people. You're talking about the people that I died for. You
50:30
talk You're talking about the people that Oh you're going to the marketplace thing and
50:36
you're not gonna invite me to this man said there's no separation for him.
50:43
And so when we separate, as type A, people were bringing it back.
50:46
Right when we separated, that's when we, like she said earlier,
50:51
that's when we experienced anxiety. That's when we experienced frustration, that's when we
50:54
experienced limitations. That that's when we're experienced lack. And so the reason why
51:00
I'm able, it's frustrating to my flesh, which I saw was my flesh
51:04
crime because my flesh doesn't like the situation. But my spirit knows that as
51:07
I continue to push through that the will of God is being done. And
51:13
at the end of the day, what really matters is that God gets the
51:17
victory. Just you just said, mind, I had a thought you just
51:22
you literally just took it. You said, your biggest thing is that God
51:24
gets the victory. Type A, Type B, Type C A don't matter
51:31
whatever the thing is in business and ministry, the thing that's going to keep
51:37
you when things happen is your why, right if you're and that's a hard
51:45
thing, right, So like if you're honest with yourself as to why you
51:47
started something or to why you're doing something, if your why is I at
51:52
the end of day, I just want God to get the glory. I
51:54
know God put me here. I know I'm doing this because He told me
51:58
to. Then that's the why, right, So regardless of what comes up,
52:00
because stuff gonna stuff, gonna stuff gonna happen, you know what I'm
52:04
saying. But if your heart is not, hey, what is my why
52:07
and why I'm doing this? If it's all about you, then it's easy
52:10
to throw in the towel. Yeah, you know what I'm saying. It's
52:13
easy to quit. It's easy to to not finish the thing that you started
52:16
because we're so we're self focused. But it's like, at the end of
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the day, God gave it to us. If God gave it to you,
52:23
you know what I'm saying, then you gotta finish it because he who
52:29
started, he who started a good thing, He's gonna finish it. But
52:32
he's using you to do it. And so you just gotta stay connected,
52:36
man. And that's and that's it. That's see y'all. Y'all tell us
52:40
in the comments what y'all thought about this? Now y'all feeling us or not
52:44
saying feeling us, but like, what did y'all think like this, was
52:47
this helpful? Was this beneficial to your thoughts? What are you gonna do?
52:52
What's your action steps after these? Because this was not a conversation that
52:58
we planned. Don't have it. You know. I was to start talking
53:00
about some else and then I got emotional, all to be a cry baby.
53:08
Y'all. We appreciate y'all, We love y'all, We thank y'all for
53:12
tuning in each week, and we just we just love y'all. So let
53:16
us know what it is in the comments until next week. Life could be
53:22
much more simple if you just asked, see you later, thank you for
53:31
tuning in to this week's episode. Since you've made it this far, you
53:36
might as well connect with us on all social media platforms at the Jessica S.
53:39
Smith. I know I won't see you back until next week, but
53:44
until then, remember to love always yourself and always thank thank God for one
53:52
another day. Hey, Hey, I know we could be another way.
54:00
Hey, pray thank God for another day. Hey Hey, I'm just thankfu
54:07
for another day. Hey Hey another day? Oh another day? Wise,
54:15
another day to get it right, another day to rise up, another day
54:17
living another day We loved ones. I always remember, hold it down for
54:22
a ball one yeh