Latest / Chatting with The Experts with Paula Okonneh / Elevating Women's Confidence

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Elevating Women's Confidence · Chatting with The Experts with Paula Okonneh

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Hello, everyone and welcome to this episode of Chatting With The Experts
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TV show hosted by me, Paula Okonneh.
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Every week, I bring to you amazing women from Africa, from
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the Caribbean, in the Diaspora.
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And these women are professionals or successful business owners.
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And the mission of this show is to inspire, to educate
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and empower women globally.
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And guess what?
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My guests never disappoint.
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Never ever disappoint you.
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Today, our show is about Confidence, The Secret Sauce to Success.
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And we'll be talking about building confidence from the inside out.
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With me to do this is Dr.
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Neema Moore, who is a dynamic chiropractor.
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I can't speak today.
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A dynamic chiropractor.
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She's also a speaker and an Amazon best-selling author of the
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empowering book, Confidence Now.
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She's also a business owner.
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She has a fervent dedication to championing professional women, and
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she's deeply committed to helping them cultivate confidence, enhance their well
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being, and step into their full potential.
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I always say, my guests' bios are so, oh my gosh, bold.
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Bios always bowl me over.
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So because of that, now I have a tactic of asking them to just share
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themselves and to talk about themselves instead of me reading all of the
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amazing things that they've done.
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And so with that, I want to welcome Dr.
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Neema Moore to the show.
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Hi everyone.
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Thank you so much, Paula for having me here today.
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I'm so excited to have this conversation.
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Absolutely.
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I say this every time, but I am blessed when people say yes.
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So thank you for coming on.
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Absolutely.
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So you talked about that.
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You're a chiropractor.
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Yes.
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You're a speaker and you're an Amazon bestseller.
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Well, you know, that's why I'm saying I am thrilled to have you here.
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Look at all these titles that I can attach to your names
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and all the platforms you're on.
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So let's talk about, well, first of all, how did you become
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this dynamic chiropractor?
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Tell me about that.
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I have been in practice for over a decade, seeing people from all over the world all
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up and down the East coast in Virginia.
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And, you know, as I was in my office and I would see people and just so you know,
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everyone, you know, when people read your bio, it's just your highlight reel, right?
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It's just your highlight reel.
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And it's just those great.
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Pictures we see on Facebook, but you know, as I was in my practice
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and I was practicing and I had two small children, I'm a mom to
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twins and I wanted something more.
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I would see patients come in and I would see how, you know, their
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depression or their anxiety, or even, you know, when they were stressed
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out would just affect their bodies.
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And I knew that I wanted to do something more than just adjust people in my
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office to make them feel better.
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I really wanted to think about how else can I empower people?
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And of course me being a woman, a mom, a business owner, I really
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wanted to find a way to empower women.
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I am just all about that.
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That's why I'm so excited to be on the show today because this is my
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jam, like empowering women to walk.
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In their greatness.
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I just think women are just so amazing.
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And I wanted to find different ways outside of the office
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to help women feel empowered.
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We share that love of that word.
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Amazing.
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When it comes to women, because I believe in that 100 percent women are amazing.
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Yes.
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Wow.
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So you went down that road and what did you discover?
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I mean, in terms of like, okay, you wanted to do more than just not
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just, but doing, you know, adjusting people so that they feel better.
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Yeah.
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What did you discover?
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How did you...
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So what happened about, you know, maybe 10 years ago, I was in practice, I was
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literally facing in the midst of a divorce and had two small children, to be honest.
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And I had to figure out ways to uplift myself.
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You know, I felt very alone running a business is already hard.
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And when women go through things like divorce, it is very, very
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challenging financially, emotionally.
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And so I had to really dig into my own toolbox to find ways to uplift
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myself and figure out what did I want my life to look like moving forward?
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You know, what did I, you know, sometimes endings are a new start.
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Yep.
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It's like, okay, what do you want your life to look like now?
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So how are you going to pick yourself back up?
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How are you going to reinvent yourself?
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And so of course I realized, you know, during that time when it
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was very hard, I felt overwhelmed.
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I felt tired.
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I had four little eyes looking at me, not just two because I had twins.
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I had to figure it out and I had to figure out, you know, how did I want to move
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forward in the world so that my children would see me feeling happy, right?
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Do you know that one of the major things to determine if your
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child's going to be successful or happy is how happy is the mom?
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Yes.
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How happy is she?
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And we hear this all the time, like mothers make a huge difference,
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whether the dad is there in the home or not, they make a huge difference
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in how our children turn out.
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So I had to get it together.
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I had to figure out What do I want my life to be like now?
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How can I, you know, help and inspire other women?
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And then of course I started to meet other women and have other girlfriends
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going through the same thing.
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And I wanted to empower them.
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I've always been that girlfriend that people came to, to ask advice
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from, and I just said, you know what, the tools that I have learned
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that I stand on for my foundation so that I can continue to push forward.
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I wanna help other women do the same.
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Awesome.
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So you started by thinking about mindset.
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How to tune your...
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Absolutely.
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Mindset.
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Let's talk more about that.
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Yeah.
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That's the first chapter in my book actually.
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Yes.
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Oh, I haven't read, you see?
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It's mindset.
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Because everything starts with the mind.
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Mm-Hmm.
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And your body follows your brain, meaning physically, emotionally,
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everything follows up here first.
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You know, we have a saying in chiropractic.
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Above Down Inside Out.
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We call it a D I O and that stands for that.
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Everything flows from above down and from inside of what's going on inside out.
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And we can use that analogy for so many different things when it comes to
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physical health, as well as mental health, because everything starts from up here.
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Everything starts with your mindset.
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Everything starts with your brain and then it flows down.
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And then also what's matters on the inside shows on the outside.
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Physically, you know, what are we talking?
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How is your body operating on the inside?
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It's going to show on the outside at some point.
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How do you feel about yourself on the inside?
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It's going to show up on the outside as well.
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So, you know, taking some of those tools and talking about, you know,
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starting with above, down, inside, out figuring out ways to practice healthy
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mindset, quieting the negative chatter that we constantly hear in our heads
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as women about you're not good enough.
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You're not pretty enough.
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Are you smart enough?
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You know, I was just had this conversation with my dad actually this morning.
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We were talking about the election and talking about how much stress and judgment
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that a woman in a high profile position has to have on her, what is she wearing?
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What is her hair look like?
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What's her background?
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It's just so much pressure that we have on us.
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And so we're constantly feeling like we're being judged.
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So we have to figure out ways to quiet the negative chatter, things
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that people have told us as a child.
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Things that people have told us in school that aren't true.
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Things that maybe our family has even said to us that maybe was
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by mistake or maybe on purpose.
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We have to figure out ways to quiet that chatter down and replace it with
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positivity and positive affirmations.
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That's right.
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Replace it with positivity and positive affirmations.
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So, okay, so that's the mindset.
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So how do we use that for mastering our bodies?
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I mean, how does that combine with, I know you said above, is it ADIO?
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Above,
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Above, Down Inside Out, but yeah, because you know, this is the thing
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that people don't realize is that when we're talking to ourselves
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or when we having this negative chatter, our bodies are listening.
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Our bodies are listening.
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I just came from a conference this weekend that talked about
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that sometimes you can have pain.
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So this is another reason why I started to get into, you know, how can I empower
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women to feel better and to have a happier life because pain will show up
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in your body when you are depressed, when you are unhappy, when you are stressed.
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And there may not even be an issue there, meaning like, for example, low back
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pain, there has been studies to already show that there is a connection between
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increased stress and low back pain.
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So a lot of times people are complaining of pain and it's
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not because they injured it.
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It's not because they feel it.
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Because they fell or they slept wrong.
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It's because they're unhappy.
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It's because they're mentally, their mindset is not in the right place.
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And they're having some mental struggles along the way.
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Wow.
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And there is a direct scientific connection between how you feel about
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your body, as well as how it actually feels if you're in pain, if you
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feel too tight, all of those things.
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Okay.
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Right.
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And I've heard that, but I'm just thinking like, okay, so if I come to
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you, I haven't told you what's going on in my life, but like, oh my gosh.
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At this age, if I say my knee hurts, you know, someone will say Arthritis.
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Maybe that it's not arthritis.
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I'm just overwhelmed with life.
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How would you help me?
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That's a great question.
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So, you know, I have so many different people, but I'm going to tell you this.
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My favorite people and my avatar or the people that I love treating are
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women who are over 40, who are trying to get their health back on track.
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And you know, a lot of times they are forgotten.
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A lot of people in the chiropractic profession, they
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adjust pregnant women and babies.
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And I said, you know, what about the women who are done having babies and, you
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know, are at that point where the kids are older and they realize, hold up, I've
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got some, I'm still young, I'm still young and sassy and I want to do some things.
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I want to travel.
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I want to, you know, start another career, you know, but you can only
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do those things when you feel good.
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And, you know, to live longer means that you get to be on the earth to
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have more fun with your family, to make more money, to start another
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business, start another career.
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And so you want that longevity.
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So what I do is when people come into my office, of course, I see people virtually
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as well as I help women in my office.
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So I help women to become confident and healthy from the inside out
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through my chiropractic care through functional medicine, as well as maybe
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we'll talk a little bit about my luxury wellness retreats and experiences
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that I have inside of the country as well as outside of the country.
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We're going to Aruba next week.
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I'm taking a group of women to Aruba next week, but we start with the conversation,
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a consultation to see, you know, what direction are you looking to go?
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Are you trying to better your health?
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Would you like to lose weight?
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I have programs for both.
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So it starts with a conversation.
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Then we do an examination.
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If you come into my office for chiropractic care, we do an examination.
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If you are a virtual patient, we start with a DNA test that actually
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tells me how fast are you aging?
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Are you the age that you say you are, and if you're not where you want
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to be, let's roll back the clock.
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Let's get you on the right supplements.
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Let's get you on the amount that you need for vitamin D.
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Let's answer the questions of what should I take to feel better, to decrease
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inflammation for that chronic arthritis that you're feeling in your knee.
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So those are some of the things that we start with.
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It always starts with a conversation, consultation.
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No one gets cookie cutter treatment from me.
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I really like to customize plans for each woman that comes into my office because
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I have a lot of tools in my toolbox.
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Maybe it's chiropractic, maybe it's weight loss.
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Maybe it's just, I want to live longer and feel better and have less brain fog.
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Those are the things that we talk about.
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And then we create a plan for you.
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Oh, I absolutely love it.
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I love it.
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And, you know, you mentioned that one of the tools or one of the
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ways you help women is luxury.
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Yes.
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And, you know, when you talked about Aruba, I thought of course, sunshine,.
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And I associate sunshine with excess vitamin or vitamin D.
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Exactly.
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Yeah.
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So we know I'm from the Caribbean and I'm also from Nigeria.
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So I know about sunshine, sometimes excess sunshine.
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So women like my family who live like in the Caribbean or in Nigeria, how, I
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mean, I guess vitamin D will not be part of what you recommend for them because
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I'm not going to say that I'm actually going to say, you know, they do get a
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lot of vitamin D, but you know what, because of our beautiful melanin,
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sometimes we don't absorb as much as our lighter melanin counterparts.
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And so sometimes we think just by getting out inside in front of the
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sun, that is a wonderful thing, but sometimes it's not enough.
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And we still need supplementation.
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So the only way to know would be to know that would be to get tested.
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I believe in knowing your numbers to know that, you know, what do we need
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to do to increase that vitamin D?
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Because vitamin D, like they finally understand now what chiropractors have
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been saying for a long time about the importance of vitamins in our system.
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And vitamin D has stepped to the forefront because we need
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it when it comes to immunity.
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We need it when it comes to our bones.
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We need it when it comes to inflammation so many different
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things depend on vitamin D.
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So I wouldn't necessarily say that I would say, you know what,
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it's still important to test them.
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Because even though they are getting outside, sometimes it doesn't convert.
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Like, our lighter counterparts who don't have as much melanin.
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See, I heard someone else say that.
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So you're confirming what I heard.
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Yes, that's very true.
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Yeah, we don't synthesize it the same.
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And sometimes mindset too, we feel, Oh, if I stay out too long, I'll get too
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dark and I don't want to be too dark.
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So, let me get into the shade.
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Being a person of color, there's a lot of things that are constantly
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in the back of our minds.
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And that, and I say person of color, because a lot of different races who
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do have a lot of melanin, that is, that is something they are concerned about.
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Yes.
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Asians, Indians, like I said, people of color, that's a whole
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'nother show we need to do.
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But yeah, so sometimes people don't want to be out in the sun and I,
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and also the sun can do damage.
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It does sun damage.
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Sun damage is real to people of color.
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That's not good either, you know, and it causes you to age quicker.
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So, you know, it's one of those things I'd rather take a good supplement than
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probably stay out in the sun too long.
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Not because of skin color, but because more of the damage it does.
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You know, we've got environmental things going on where we don't
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have much of a protection.
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So your skin can burn so quickly and that causes your face to age quicker.
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True.
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That's so true.
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All right.
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So we talked about mindset and how you can help through, I mean, different
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tools that you have in your toolbox.
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Yes.
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Now, does any of that include us or include groups, you
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know, like, do we do it alone?
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Do you recommend that?
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Let's just talk about.
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Yes.
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We, older women.
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We don't normally do well when we are by ourselves.
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No, we don't.
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We love to be with our friends, our girlfriends, you know,
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doing fun things together.
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So is that one of the things you incorporate?
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Absolutely.
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You know, I think women, we love...
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one of my business coaches said, women love getting together and just talking.
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Like we love, let me tell you, that will never ever get old.
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It's who we are.
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It's how we were created.
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We are meant to be bonded.
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We are meant to be in that kind of tribal sisterhood.
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That is just who, I don't care what type of woman you are.
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Women like to be around other women.
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We like to have connection.
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We like to have nurturing.
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It's just who we are.
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So I encourage, and I actually have a group where people can become a
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part of where, you know, you get that encouragement and that information
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that you need to better your health.
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2025 for me is going to be all about women's wellness.
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I'm going to be totally tapping into and promoting more of
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women getting healthy and happy.
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And one of those ways is going to be in groups.
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I suggest that women come together in groups because I think we
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can learn from each other.
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We learned so much from each other.
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You know, sometimes women say, well, I don't want to be in a group.
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I just want one on one with you.
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And I do that too.
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But what I learned is that when we're in a group and someone else asks a question,
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sometimes you may say, well, I wondered that too, but I didn't want to say it, you
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know, and so we just learn from each other and also what's really important right
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now because of where we are in the world.
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And what I mean by that is.
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Loneliness, you know, the surgeon general has already said that
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loneliness is going to be an epidemic.
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And we are going to feel more alone and we are already feeling more alone than
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ever, especially coming out of COVID.
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So I think it's important for women.
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People aren't going out as much sometimes.
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And so I really think it's important for women to connect in-person, online so
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that they know that they're not alone.
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They're not the only one having a health issue or health challenge.
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You are so right.
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Not being alone on, or even if you know, sometimes I heard somebody say this one
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she said I'm in a crowd but I feel alone.
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Knowing that someone out there in a group like you said may say something
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that you've been feeling you just didn't know how to get it out.
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That's itself.
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And that's why I'm just thinking, Paula, you need to come to one of my events.
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This year is going to be about bringing women together in small, intimate groups,
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where we go someplace fabulous and have lunch or go to the mountaintop and have
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a glass of wine and just connect, talk to each other, not a big crowd, but
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where you can connect and talk to each other and, you know, maybe network as
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well, or find another sisterhood and create another sisterhood with someone.
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That's going to be it for me moving forward for sure.
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That sounds exciting.
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Tell me a little bit more about it since you've openly invited me.
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Yes.
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Tell me.
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And you all are invited as well if you're watching.
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Alright.
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Of course.
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I love bringing people together and it's just one of the things that I love to do.
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That's why I started to create the retreats to bring people together, but
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I do that here in Northern Virginia as well and surrounding areas.
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We just went to Bluemont, Virginia Bluemont winery,
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which is on top of a mountain.
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You can see the, you know, the leaves are changing here and it was just beautiful.
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And I love bringing women together to just connect, to take their cape off.
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That so that they can be their authentic selves.
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It's so important for women to feel that they can just be themselves.
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Just like we were talking about all the pressures that we have
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you know, what do you look like?
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What are you wearing?
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You know, how much education do you have?
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You know, do you have kids?
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Do you not have kids?
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How much do you weigh?
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So I like to bring women together who are diverse.
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You know, from all walks of life and all ages that can really
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come together and connect, share.
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I kind of facilitate, we eat some great food, laugh, hug, and everyone just feels
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uplifted and empowered when they leave.
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You are already wetting my appetite.
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So I've already said yes.
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I don't even know what date it is, but it's a yes.
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Perfect.
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And as you said, I mean, this is also extended to all who have joined us today.
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Absolutely.
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And also please know, like people come from all over the country to,
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to my events, even if, even though I have them here, people come from
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New York, they come from North Carolina, they come from Georgia.
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They come from all over to come to the events because they want that connection.
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And they want to be, I'm very particular about who comes because
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I want to make sure that I have a safe environment for women to have
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a good time and be themselves.
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Absolutely.
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I love that, you know, because there's nothing better than a safe space.
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Yes.
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Nothing better than when women come together.
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They like to talk as you mentioned for the most part, but even when
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they're speaking to each other, they want to feel safe and heard and seen.
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And so that sounds like what you're doing.
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Exactly, exactly.
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I love it.
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So, where can people find you online because I know we're talking
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here and there are people waiting to continue the conversation.
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Yes.
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And listen, I love connecting with people.
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I am a people person.
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So please don't be afraid to send me a message and say, Hey, or I
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saw you over there or comment.
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I am on all platforms under the same name, which is Dr.
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Neema DC.
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So DR my name Neema, N-E-E-M-A and my Doctor of Chiropractic,
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initials behind it, DC.
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So you can find me on Instagram Facebook, as well as LinkedIn
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on all under the same name, Dr.
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Neema DC, and I'd be happy to connect with you.
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And folks, I can vouch for that.
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She and I were at a conference.
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That's right.
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Earlier on.
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And that's how we connected.
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And...
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yes, we sat right next to each other.
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Right?
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And here we are now.
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And here we are.
23:50
Yes.
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So take those conversations sometimes offline, online, and many times I
23:57
say take it from online to offline.
24:00
Yes.
24:01
Because we need each other.
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We need to connect and we need to, how else are we going to better the world?
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We are the ones, those of us who have children, we are the ones who
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bring these children into the world.
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And even if we don't have children, we nurture.
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We are the nurturers and we bring people together.
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So let's continue to do that by coming together.
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Yes.
24:22
And with that, I want to encourage people, if you've listened to
24:25
this, or even those in the audience can share this with other people.
24:29
If you'd like to be a guest on my show, reach out to me on my website,
24:33
which is chattingwiththeexperts.com.
24:36
I'm on LinkedIn as Paula Okonneh.
24:38
I'm also on Instagram.
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My handle there is at chat_podcast.
24:44
I always get this wrong.
24:46
All right.
24:46
Let's say that again.
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I'm at chat_experts_podcast and I'm on Facebook as Paula Okonneh.
24:56
Reach out to me there and come join us on this right now is the online world, but
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we always stay behind to speak with those who join us because there's nothing better
25:07
than you've listened to someone, heard their views, but you have a question.
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You can ask Neema today that question immediately after this.
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Thank you, Neema, for saying yes,
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I enjoyed talking to you.
25:20
Absolutely.
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Thank you so much for having me.
25:23
Absolutely.