Latest / Becoming Financially Confident / How Do You Talk About Money With Your Spouse Without Fighting?

Transcript

How Do You Talk About Money With Your Spouse Without Fighting? · Becoming Financially Confident

• 1:20
  Have
• 1:20
  you
• 1:20
  ever
• 1:21
  sat
• 1:21
  in
• 1:21
  your
• 1:21
  car
• 1:21
  in
• 1:21
  the
• 1:21
  driveway
• 1:22
  and
• 1:23
  you're
• 1:23
  just
• 1:23
  dreading
• 1:24
  going
• 1:24
  in
• 1:24
  beside.
• 1:24
  Because
• 1:25
  you
• 1:25
  know
• 1:25
  that
• 1:25
  money
• 1:26
  talk
• 1:26
  is
• 1:26
  waiting
• 1:26
  for
• 1:27
  you?
• 1:28
  Kind
• 1:28
  of
• 1:28
  feels
• 1:29
  like
• 1:29
  you're
• 1:29
  walking
• 1:29
  into
• 1:29
  a
• 1:30
  minefield
• 1:30
  where
• 1:30
  one
• 1:31
  wrong
• 1:31
  word
• 1:31
  explodes
• 1:32
  into
• 1:32
  a
• 1:32
  shouting
• 1:33
  match
• 1:34
  or
• 1:34
  worse,
• 1:35
  icy
• 1:36
  silence.
• 1:38
  If
• 1:38
  you
• 1:38
  feel
• 1:38
  like
• 1:38
  your
• 1:39
  spouse
• 1:39
  is
• 1:39
  your
• 1:39
  financial
• 1:40
  enemy
• 1:40
  instead
• 1:41
  of
• 1:41
  your
• 1:41
  partner,
• 1:42
  hear
• 1:42
  me
• 1:42
  clearly.
• 1:43
  You're
• 1:43
  not
• 1:43
  alone
• 1:44
  feeling
• 1:44
  that
• 1:44
  way,
• 1:45
  and
• 1:45
  your
• 1:46
  marriage
• 1:46
  is
• 1:46
  not
• 1:46
  broken.
• 1:48
  And
• 1:48
  today
• 1:48
  I'm
• 1:48
  not
• 1:48
  going
• 1:49
  to
• 1:49
  give
• 1:49
  you
• 1:49
  a
• 1:49
  lecture.
• 1:50
  I'm
• 1:50
  going
• 1:50
  to
• 1:50
  give
• 1:51
  you
• 1:51
  a
• 1:51
  tool
• 1:51
  today,
• 1:52
  something
• 1:52
  you
• 1:52
  can
• 1:53
  use
• 1:53
  this
• 1:53
  very
• 1:53
  week
• 1:54
  to
• 1:54
  lower
• 1:54
  the
• 1:54
  temperature
• 1:55
  and
• 1:55
  rebuild
• 1:56
  trust.
• 1:57
  Today
• 1:57
  we're
• 1:58
  putting
• 1:58
  down
• 1:58
  the
• 1:58
  weapons,
• 1:59
  and
• 1:59
  we're
• 1:59
  picking
• 2:00
  up
• 2:00
  a
• 2:00
  simple
• 2:00
  deck
• 2:01
  of
• 2:01
  prompts
• 2:01
  that
• 2:02
  turns
• 2:02
  money
• 2:02
  tension
• 2:03
  into
• 2:04
  teamwork.
• 2:19
  We
• 2:21
  rise.
• 2:26
  Hey,
• 2:27
  friend.
• 2:27
  Ralph
• 2:27
  Estep
• 2:28
  Jr.
• 2:28
  Here.
• 2:29
  This
• 2:29
  is
• 2:29
  financially
• 2:30
  Confident
• 2:30
  Christian,
• 2:31
  where
• 2:32
  every
• 2:32
  day
• 2:32
  we're
• 2:32
  working
• 2:33
  to
• 2:33
  break
• 2:33
  that
• 2:33
  cycle
• 2:34
  of
• 2:34
  financial
• 2:35
  shame
• 2:35
  and
• 2:36
  live
• 2:36
  in
• 2:36
  confidence.
• 2:37
  And
• 2:38
  today's
• 2:38
  topic
• 2:39
  is
• 2:39
  one
• 2:40
  that
• 2:40
  hits
• 2:40
  so
• 2:40
  much
• 2:41
  for
• 2:41
  so
• 2:41
  many
• 2:41
  of
• 2:42
  us
• 2:42
  in
• 2:42
  relationships.
• 2:43
  It's
• 2:44
  stopping
• 2:44
  those
• 2:45
  money
• 2:45
  fights.
• 2:45
  Dare
• 2:46
  say
• 2:46
  stopping
• 2:47
  them
• 2:47
  before
• 2:47
  they
• 2:48
  even
• 2:48
  start.
• 2:49
  And
• 2:49
  it
• 2:49
  really
• 2:49
  comes
• 2:49
  down
• 2:50
  to
• 2:50
  changing
• 2:50
  the
• 2:51
  format
• 2:51
  of
• 2:51
  the
• 2:51
  conversation.
• 2:53
  But
• 2:53
  this
• 2:53
  came
• 2:53
  about
• 2:54
  because
• 2:54
  of
• 2:54
  a
• 2:54
  listener
• 2:55
  question.
• 2:55
  So
• 2:55
  let's
• 2:55
  get
• 2:55
  right
• 2:56
  in
• 2:56
  today's
• 2:56
  listener
• 2:57
  question.
• 2:58
  That's
• 2:58
  what
• 2:58
  the
• 2:59
  listener
• 2:59
  wrote.
• 2:59
  Ralph,
• 3:00
  I
• 3:00
  am
• 3:01
  so
• 3:01
  tired
• 3:01
  of
• 3:01
  fighting
• 3:02
  about
• 3:02
  money
• 3:02
  with
• 3:03
  my
• 3:03
  spouse.
• 3:04
  Every
• 3:05
  single
• 3:05
  conversation
• 3:06
  turns
• 3:06
  into
• 3:07
  an
• 3:07
  argument.
• 3:08
  And
• 3:08
  honestly,
• 3:09
  I
• 3:09
  don't
• 3:09
  know
• 3:09
  how
• 3:09
  to
• 3:10
  fix
• 3:10
  it.
• 3:11
  We're
• 3:11
  supposed
• 3:11
  to
• 3:11
  be
• 3:12
  partners,
• 3:13
  but
• 3:13
  it
• 3:13
  feels
• 3:13
  like
• 3:14
  we're
• 3:14
  enemies
• 3:14
  when
• 3:14
  it
• 3:14
  comes
• 3:15
  up.
• 3:16
  How
• 3:16
  do
• 3:16
  I
• 3:17
  even
• 3:17
  start
• 3:17
  this
• 3:17
  conversation
• 3:19
  without
• 3:19
  everything
• 3:20
  falling
• 3:20
  apart?
• 3:23
  And
• 3:24
  I
• 3:24
  almost
• 3:24
  felt
• 3:24
  like
• 3:24
  I
• 3:24
  could
• 3:25
  have
• 3:25
  sent
• 3:25
  in
• 3:25
  this
• 3:25
  question.
• 3:27
  And
• 3:27
  I
• 3:28
  bet
• 3:28
  so
• 3:28
  many
• 3:28
  of
• 3:28
  you
• 3:29
  watching
• 3:29
  or
• 3:29
  listening
• 3:29
  right
• 3:30
  now
• 3:30
  are
• 3:30
  thinking,
• 3:30
  ralph,
• 3:30
  man,
• 3:31
  I
• 3:31
  deal
• 3:31
  with
• 3:31
  this
• 3:32
  all
• 3:32
  the
• 3:32
  time.
• 3:34
  But
• 3:34
  here's
• 3:34
  the
• 3:35
  thing
• 3:35
  I
• 3:35
  want
• 3:35
  you
• 3:35
  to
• 3:35
  really
• 3:36
  lean
• 3:36
  into
• 3:36
  today.
• 3:37
  Money
• 3:37
  fights
• 3:38
  calm
• 3:38
  down
• 3:38
  when
• 3:38
  you
• 3:38
  make
• 3:39
  the
• 3:39
  conversation
• 3:39
  feel
• 3:40
  safe
• 3:40
  and
• 3:41
  structured,
• 3:43
  because
• 3:43
  that's
• 3:43
  what
• 3:43
  we're
• 3:44
  really
• 3:44
  talking
• 3:44
  about
• 3:44
  today.
• 3:45
  We're
• 3:45
  talking
• 3:45
  about
• 3:46
  communication.
• 3:47
  Communication
• 3:48
  is
• 3:49
  the
• 3:49
  answer
• 3:49
  to
• 3:50
  today's
• 3:50
  big
• 3:51
  picture
• 3:51
  question.
• 3:53
  But
• 3:53
  I
• 3:53
  gotta.
• 3:53
  I
• 3:54
  gotta
• 3:54
  lean
• 3:54
  into
• 3:54
  this
• 3:54
  a
• 3:54
  little
• 3:55
  bit
• 3:55
  because,
• 3:55
  listen,
• 3:55
  my
• 3:55
  wife
• 3:56
  and
• 3:56
  I
• 3:56
  have
• 3:56
  been
• 3:56
  married
• 3:56
  25
• 3:57
  years
• 3:58
  and
• 3:59
  we
• 3:59
  still
• 3:59
  battle
• 3:59
  with
• 4:00
  this.
• 4:00
  So
• 4:00
  if
• 4:00
  you've
• 4:00
  been
• 4:01
  married
• 4:01
  for
• 4:01
  a
• 4:01
  while,
• 4:01
  you've
• 4:01
  been
• 4:02
  with
• 4:02
  your
• 4:02
  partner
• 4:02
  for
• 4:02
  a
• 4:03
  while,
• 4:03
  you're
• 4:03
  thinking,
• 4:03
  ralph,
• 4:04
  wait
• 4:04
  a
• 4:04
  minute.
• 4:05
  You
• 4:06
  got
• 4:06
  a
• 4:06
  special
• 4:06
  answer.
• 4:08
  I've
• 4:08
  got
• 4:08
  a
• 4:08
  framework
• 4:09
  today.
• 4:09
  I've
• 4:10
  got
• 4:10
  something
• 4:10
  that
• 4:10
  will
• 4:10
  help,
• 4:12
  but
• 4:12
  I
• 4:12
  don't
• 4:12
  want
• 4:12
  you
• 4:13
  to
• 4:13
  be
• 4:13
  discouraged.
• 4:13
  But
• 4:13
  I
• 4:14
  also
• 4:14
  want
• 4:14
  you
• 4:14
  to
• 4:14
  be
• 4:14
  realistic.
• 4:15
  You're
• 4:15
  not
• 4:15
  going
• 4:15
  to
• 4:16
  solve
• 4:16
  these
• 4:16
  issues
• 4:16
  overnight.
• 4:17
  I
• 4:17
  don't
• 4:17
  have
• 4:18
  some
• 4:18
  secret
• 4:19
  pill.
• 4:19
  You
• 4:20
  take
• 4:20
  this
• 4:20
  and
• 4:20
  it's
• 4:20
  solved.
• 4:22
  This
• 4:22
  is
• 4:22
  an
• 4:22
  ongoing
• 4:23
  process,
• 4:24
  but
• 4:25
  let's
• 4:25
  get
• 4:25
  right
• 4:25
  into
• 4:25
  how
• 4:26
  do
• 4:26
  we
• 4:26
  get
• 4:26
  to
• 4:26
  that?
• 4:27
  The
• 4:27
  first
• 4:27
  thing
• 4:28
  we've
• 4:28
  got
• 4:28
  to
• 4:28
  do
• 4:29
  is
• 4:29
  we've
• 4:29
  got
• 4:29
  to
• 4:30
  reframe
• 4:30
  the
• 4:30
  real
• 4:31
  issue,
• 4:32
  because
• 4:33
  90%
• 4:33
  of
• 4:33
  the
• 4:34
  time,
• 4:34
  maybe,
• 4:34
  dare
• 4:34
  I
• 4:34
  say
• 4:35
  95%
• 4:36
  of
• 4:36
  the
• 4:36
  time,
• 4:37
  it's
• 4:38
  not
• 4:38
  money.
• 4:40
  Now,
• 4:40
  it
• 4:40
  could
• 4:40
  be
• 4:40
  what
• 4:40
  money
• 4:41
  brings
• 4:41
  about.
• 4:41
  See,
• 4:42
  most
• 4:42
  money
• 4:42
  fights
• 4:43
  are
• 4:43
  about
• 4:43
  safety.
• 4:45
  I
• 4:45
  don't
• 4:45
  feel
• 4:46
  safe.
• 4:47
  I'm
• 4:47
  worried
• 4:47
  about
• 4:48
  this.
• 4:49
  They're
• 4:49
  about
• 4:49
  control.
• 4:51
  I
• 4:51
  don't
• 4:51
  like
• 4:51
  being
• 4:52
  controlled.
• 4:52
  Or
• 4:52
  maybe
• 4:53
  you're
• 4:53
  the
• 4:53
  one
• 4:53
  that
• 4:53
  likes
• 4:53
  to
• 4:54
  control
• 4:54
  everything.
• 4:55
  Guilty
• 4:56
  of
• 4:56
  me,
• 4:56
  I
• 4:56
  was
• 4:56
  a
• 4:57
  control
• 4:57
  guy
• 4:57
  a
• 4:57
  lot
• 4:57
  of
• 4:58
  times,
• 4:59
  and
• 4:59
  for
• 4:59
  a
• 5:00
  lot
• 5:00
  of
• 5:00
  people,
• 5:01
  it's
• 5:01
  that
• 5:01
  feeling
• 5:02
  of
• 5:02
  being
• 5:02
  alone.
• 5:05
  It's
• 5:05
  not
• 5:05
  the
• 5:05
  dollars.
• 5:06
  What
• 5:07
  I
• 5:07
  hear
• 5:07
  from
• 5:08
  couples
• 5:08
  that
• 5:08
  I
• 5:08
  work
• 5:09
  with,
• 5:09
  that
• 5:09
  I
• 5:09
  counsel.
• 5:10
  Most
• 5:11
  times
• 5:11
  there's
• 5:11
  one
• 5:12
  spouse
• 5:13
  that
• 5:13
  feels
• 5:13
  like
• 5:13
  they're
• 5:13
  all
• 5:14
  alone
• 5:14
  in
• 5:14
  the
• 5:14
  money
• 5:15
  decisions.
• 5:16
  All
• 5:17
  the
• 5:17
  stress
• 5:17
  comes
• 5:17
  back
• 5:18
  on.
• 5:19
  And
• 5:19
  the
• 5:19
  problem
• 5:19
  is
• 5:20
  a
• 5:20
  lot
• 5:20
  of
• 5:20
  times
• 5:20
  one
• 5:21
  spouse
• 5:21
  hears
• 5:22
  $50
• 5:23
  and
• 5:23
  they
• 5:23
  think,
• 5:24
  Freedom.
• 5:24
  Oh,
• 5:24
  this
• 5:24
  is
• 5:25
  great,
• 5:25
  $50.
• 5:27
  But
• 5:27
  the
• 5:27
  other
• 5:28
  person
• 5:28
  hears
• 5:28
  that
• 5:29
  same
• 5:29
  $50,
• 5:31
  and
• 5:32
  the
• 5:32
  siren
• 5:32
  lights
• 5:33
  go
• 5:33
  off.
• 5:33
  They
• 5:33
  hear
• 5:33
  a
• 5:33
  threat.
• 5:35
  So
• 5:35
  if
• 5:35
  you
• 5:35
  want
• 5:35
  to
• 5:36
  be
• 5:36
  effective
• 5:36
  in
• 5:36
  this,
• 5:37
  you've
• 5:37
  got
• 5:37
  to
• 5:37
  change
• 5:38
  the
• 5:38
  format.
• 5:38
  That's
• 5:39
  what
• 5:39
  we're
• 5:39
  really
• 5:39
  talking
• 5:39
  about
• 5:40
  today.
• 5:40
  It's
• 5:40
  the
• 5:41
  format
• 5:42
  that's
• 5:42
  got
• 5:42
  to
• 5:43
  change
• 5:43
  before
• 5:44
  we
• 5:44
  can
• 5:44
  even
• 5:44
  try
• 5:44
  to
• 5:45
  change
• 5:45
  the
• 5:45
  numbers.
• 5:46
  I'm
• 5:46
  not
• 5:46
  saying
• 5:47
  that
• 5:47
  there
• 5:47
  aren't
• 5:47
  places
• 5:48
  where
• 5:48
  we
• 5:48
  may
• 5:48
  need
• 5:48
  to
• 5:49
  change
• 5:49
  numbers,
• 5:50
  but,
• 5:51
  man,
• 5:51
  we
• 5:51
  can't
• 5:51
  get
• 5:52
  there
• 5:52
  until
• 5:52
  we
• 5:52
  change
• 5:53
  the
• 5:53
  format.
• 5:53
  Because
• 5:54
  if
• 5:54
  it
• 5:54
  starts
• 5:55
  like
• 5:55
  a
• 5:55
  courtroom,
• 5:57
  if
• 5:57
  you
• 5:57
  walk
• 5:58
  into
• 5:58
  a
• 5:58
  conversation
• 5:59
  with
• 5:59
  your
• 5:59
  partner
• 6:01
  and
• 6:01
  it
• 6:01
  starts
• 6:01
  off
• 6:02
  with
• 6:02
  these
• 6:02
  words,
• 6:02
  you
• 6:03
  always
• 6:05
  it's
• 6:05
  going
• 6:05
  to
• 6:05
  end
• 6:06
  like
• 6:06
  a
• 6:06
  war.
• 6:07
  That's
• 6:08
  how
• 6:08
  courtrooms
• 6:08
  start.
• 6:10
  What
• 6:10
  you've
• 6:10
  got
• 6:10
  to
• 6:11
  really
• 6:11
  do
• 6:11
  at
• 6:11
  the
• 6:11
  front
• 6:12
  end
• 6:12
  of
• 6:12
  this
• 6:12
  is
• 6:12
  you've
• 6:13
  got
• 6:13
  to
• 6:13
  build
• 6:13
  that
• 6:13
  connection,
• 6:15
  because
• 6:15
  that
• 6:15
  connection
• 6:16
  will
• 6:16
  lower
• 6:17
  your
• 6:17
  defenses
• 6:17
  faster
• 6:18
  than
• 6:18
  any
• 6:19
  amount
• 6:19
  of
• 6:19
  data
• 6:20
  that
• 6:20
  you
• 6:20
  can
• 6:20
  ever
• 6:20
  supply
• 6:21
  to
• 6:21
  them.
• 6:21
  But
• 6:21
  if
• 6:21
  you
• 6:22
  start
• 6:22
  off
• 6:22
  with,
• 6:22
  you
• 6:22
  always
• 6:24
  stop
• 6:24
  what
• 6:24
  you're
• 6:25
  doing,
• 6:25
  walk
• 6:26
  away
• 6:26
  and
• 6:27
  start
• 6:27
  over,
• 6:27
  because
• 6:28
  you're
• 6:28
  getting
• 6:28
  nowhere
• 6:29
  with
• 6:29
  that.
• 6:30
  Which
• 6:30
  leads
• 6:30
  me
• 6:31
  to
• 6:31
  my
• 6:31
  Money
• 6:32
  Huddle
• 6:32
  Deck.
• 6:33
  And
• 6:33
  I
• 6:33
  want
• 6:34
  you
• 6:34
  to
• 6:34
  really
• 6:35
  consider
• 6:35
  this
• 6:35
  today.
• 6:35
  Instead
• 6:36
  of
• 6:36
  some
• 6:36
  spreadsheet
• 6:37
  of
• 6:37
  financials
• 6:38
  and
• 6:38
  all
• 6:38
  that,
• 6:38
  that
• 6:38
  stuff's
• 6:39
  great.
• 6:39
  There's
• 6:39
  a
• 6:39
  place
• 6:39
  for
• 6:40
  that.
• 6:40
  But
• 6:41
  right
• 6:41
  now,
• 6:41
  I
• 6:41
  want
• 6:41
  to
• 6:41
  tell
• 6:41
  you,
• 6:42
  you
• 6:42
  can
• 6:42
  get
• 6:42
  a
• 6:42
  copy
• 6:42
  of
• 6:42
  our
• 6:43
  Money
• 6:43
  Huddle
• 6:43
  Deck
• 6:44
  by
• 6:44
  joining
• 6:45
  our
• 6:45
  free
• 6:45
  community.
• 6:46
  That
• 6:46
  free
• 6:46
  community
• 6:47
  is
• 6:47
  founded
• 6:48
  financiallyconfidentChristian.com/join
• 6:51
  and
• 6:52
  I'm
• 6:52
  encourage
• 6:52
  you
• 6:52
  to
• 6:52
  get
• 6:52
  that
• 6:53
  today,
• 6:53
  but
• 6:54
  I'm
• 6:54
  going
• 6:54
  to
• 6:54
  give
• 6:54
  it
• 6:54
  to
• 6:54
  you
• 6:54
  again.
• 6:55
  It'll
• 6:55
  be
• 6:55
  in
• 6:55
  the
• 6:55
  show
• 6:55
  notes.
• 6:56
  It's
• 6:56
  financiallyconfidentchristian.com/join
• 7:01
  let's
• 7:01
  talk
• 7:01
  about
• 7:01
  that
• 7:02
  money
• 7:02
  huddle.
• 7:03
  It's
• 7:03
  just
• 7:03
  10
• 7:04
  minutes,
• 7:05
  two
• 7:05
  questions
• 7:06
  and
• 7:07
  one
• 7:07
  decision.
• 7:08
  And
• 7:09
  this
• 7:09
  money
• 7:09
  huddle
• 7:10
  is
• 7:10
  all
• 7:10
  about
• 7:10
  prompts
• 7:11
  that
• 7:11
  help
• 7:11
  you
• 7:11
  understand
• 7:12
  before
• 7:13
  you
• 7:13
  correct
• 7:13
  something.
• 7:15
  So
• 7:15
  once
• 7:15
  you
• 7:15
  get
• 7:16
  that,
• 7:16
  you're
• 7:16
  going
• 7:16
  to
• 7:17
  follow
• 7:17
  four
• 7:17
  rules
• 7:18
  that
• 7:18
  keep
• 7:18
  it
• 7:18
  peaceful.
• 7:19
  Let's
• 7:20
  get
• 7:20
  right
• 7:20
  into
• 7:20
  those.
• 7:21
  You
• 7:21
  can
• 7:22
  always
• 7:22
  go
• 7:22
  back
• 7:22
  and
• 7:22
  listen
• 7:22
  to
• 7:22
  this
• 7:23
  again.
• 7:23
  But
• 7:24
  we're
• 7:24
  going
• 7:24
  to
• 7:24
  start
• 7:24
  with
• 7:24
  one
• 7:25
  card
• 7:25
  each.
• 7:26
  That's
• 7:26
  really
• 7:26
  the
• 7:27
  key
• 7:27
  to
• 7:27
  this.
• 7:27
  Just
• 7:27
  one
• 7:27
  card.
• 7:28
  We're
• 7:28
  only
• 7:28
  taking
• 7:28
  a
• 7:29
  little
• 7:29
  piece
• 7:29
  of
• 7:29
  this
• 7:30
  at
• 7:30
  a
• 7:30
  time.
• 7:31
  And
• 7:31
  each
• 7:31
  of
• 7:31
  you
• 7:31
  gets
• 7:32
  60
• 7:32
  seconds.
• 7:33
  This
• 7:33
  isn't
• 7:33
  time
• 7:34
  to
• 7:34
  pontificate.
• 7:35
  This
• 7:35
  isn't
• 7:36
  time
• 7:36
  to
• 7:36
  list
• 7:37
  all
• 7:37
  the
• 7:37
  terrible
• 7:38
  things
• 7:38
  that
• 7:38
  have
• 7:38
  happened.
• 7:38
  This
• 7:38
  isn't
• 7:39
  a
• 7:39
  time
• 7:39
  for
• 7:39
  speeches.
• 7:41
  It's
• 7:41
  also
• 7:42
  not
• 7:42
  a
• 7:42
  time
• 7:42
  for
• 7:42
  fixing.
• 7:44
  It's
• 7:44
  only
• 7:44
  a
• 7:45
  time
• 7:45
  for
• 7:45
  listening
• 7:46
  things
• 7:46
  like
• 7:47
  tell
• 7:47
  me
• 7:47
  more
• 7:48
  or
• 7:49
  reassuring.
• 7:49
  That
• 7:50
  makes
• 7:50
  sense.
• 7:51
  Again,
• 7:52
  one
• 7:52
  card,
• 7:53
  60
• 7:53
  seconds
• 7:54
  each.
• 7:54
  It's
• 7:54
  not
• 7:55
  about
• 7:55
  fixing.
• 7:55
  It's
• 7:56
  about
• 7:56
  understanding
• 7:56
  and
• 7:57
  building
• 7:57
  that
• 7:57
  communication.
• 7:58
  And
• 7:59
  we
• 7:59
  end
• 7:59
  with
• 7:59
  one
• 8:00
  we
• 8:01
  sentence.
• 8:02
  And
• 8:03
  that
• 8:03
  is
• 8:03
  the
• 8:04
  critical
• 8:04
  part
• 8:04
  of
• 8:05
  this.
• 8:05
  What
• 8:06
  is
• 8:06
  your
• 8:06
  one
• 8:07
  we
• 8:08
  sentence?
• 8:08
  Because
• 8:08
  we're
• 8:09
  a
• 8:09
  team
• 8:09
  here.
• 8:11
  Something
• 8:11
  like
• 8:11
  this
• 8:11
  this
• 8:12
  week
• 8:12
  we
• 8:12
  will.
• 8:14
  Maybe
• 8:14
  for
• 8:14
  you.
• 8:15
  You
• 8:15
  want
• 8:16
  to
• 8:16
  build
• 8:16
  that
• 8:16
  emergency
• 8:17
  fund.
• 8:18
  You
• 8:18
  want
• 8:18
  to
• 8:18
  find
• 8:18
  some
• 8:19
  joy
• 8:19
  in
• 8:19
  that
• 8:19
  joy
• 8:20
  fund,
• 8:20
  whatever
• 8:20
  that
• 8:20
  is.
• 8:21
  But
• 8:21
  it's
• 8:21
  we
• 8:22
  will
• 8:23
  not.
• 8:23
  I
• 8:23
  will
• 8:24
  or
• 8:24
  you
• 8:25
  will.
• 8:26
  We
• 8:26
  will.
• 8:28
  So
• 8:28
  start
• 8:28
  with
• 8:28
  those
• 8:29
  connection
• 8:29
  cards.
• 8:29
  It's
• 8:30
  not
• 8:30
  about
• 8:30
  correction.
• 8:32
  You
• 8:33
  could
• 8:33
  start
• 8:33
  off
• 8:33
  by
• 8:33
  saying
• 8:34
  something
• 8:34
  like
• 8:34
  this
• 8:34
  to
• 8:34
  your
• 8:35
  partner.
• 8:35
  Here's
• 8:36
  one
• 8:36
  Money
• 8:36
  stress
• 8:37
  I'm
• 8:37
  carrying.
• 8:39
  Here's
• 8:39
  one
• 8:40
  thing
• 8:40
  that
• 8:40
  would
• 8:40
  make
• 8:40
  me
• 8:41
  feel
• 8:41
  safer.
• 8:43
  Don't
• 8:43
  open
• 8:44
  it
• 8:44
  with
• 8:44
  why
• 8:45
  did
• 8:45
  you
• 8:45
  spend
• 8:46
  or
• 8:46
  why
• 8:46
  did
• 8:46
  you
• 8:47
  do
• 8:47
  this?
• 8:48
  Just
• 8:48
  talk
• 8:49
  about
• 8:49
  how
• 8:49
  you're
• 8:49
  feeling.
• 8:50
  One
• 8:50
  Money
• 8:50
  stress.
• 8:50
  I'm
• 8:51
  carrying
• 8:51
  one
• 8:52
  thing
• 8:52
  that
• 8:52
  would
• 8:52
  help
• 8:52
  me
• 8:53
  feel
• 8:53
  safer.
• 8:55
  Because
• 8:55
  in
• 8:55
  the
• 8:55
  end,
• 8:56
  hear
• 8:57
  me
• 8:57
  on
• 8:57
  this.
• 8:58
  You're
• 8:58
  not
• 8:58
  enemies.
• 9:00
  You
• 9:00
  love
• 9:01
  each
• 9:01
  other.
• 9:01
  You
• 9:01
  wouldn't
• 9:02
  be
• 9:02
  together
• 9:02
  if
• 9:02
  you
• 9:02
  didn't.
• 9:04
  There's
• 9:04
  just
• 9:04
  a
• 9:04
  problem
• 9:05
  that
• 9:05
  you
• 9:05
  can
• 9:05
  face.
• 9:05
  But
• 9:06
  listen,
• 9:06
  you're
• 9:06
  going
• 9:06
  to
• 9:06
  be
• 9:06
  so
• 9:07
  much
• 9:07
  stronger
• 9:08
  when
• 9:08
  you
• 9:08
  face
• 9:08
  it
• 9:09
  together.
• 9:10
  Trust
• 9:10
  me
• 9:10
  on
• 9:11
  this.
• 9:11
  The
• 9:11
  couples
• 9:12
  that
• 9:12
  I've
• 9:12
  worked
• 9:12
  with,
• 9:13
  when
• 9:13
  they
• 9:13
  face
• 9:14
  financial
• 9:14
  challenges
• 9:15
  as
• 9:16
  a
• 9:16
  team
• 9:16
  together,
• 9:18
  there's
• 9:18
  so
• 9:18
  much
• 9:19
  stronger
• 9:19
  in
• 9:19
  that.
• 9:20
  So
• 9:20
  today's
• 9:20
  win
• 9:21
  is
• 9:21
  actually
• 9:21
  going
• 9:22
  to
• 9:22
  be
• 9:22
  pretty
• 9:22
  simple.
• 9:22
  I
• 9:22
  want
• 9:22
  you
• 9:23
  to
• 9:23
  go
• 9:23
  get
• 9:23
  your
• 9:23
  huddle
• 9:24
  deck
• 9:24
  cards.
• 9:25
  It's
• 9:25
  not
• 9:26
  some
• 9:26
  complicated
• 9:26
  deck
• 9:27
  of
• 9:27
  a
• 9:27
  thousand
• 9:27
  cards.
• 9:28
  Really
• 9:28
  simple.
• 9:29
  When
• 9:29
  you
• 9:29
  see
• 9:29
  it,
• 9:29
  you'll
• 9:29
  understand
• 9:30
  go
• 9:30
  to
• 9:31
  financiallyconfidentchristian.com/join.
• 9:34
  You'll
• 9:34
  join
• 9:34
  our
• 9:34
  community.
• 9:35
  It
• 9:35
  cost
• 9:35
  you
• 9:35
  zero.
• 9:36
  If
• 9:36
  you
• 9:36
  want
• 9:36
  to
• 9:36
  make
• 9:36
  a
• 9:36
  donation,
• 9:37
  you're
• 9:37
  welcome
• 9:37
  to
• 9:37
  do
• 9:38
  that.
• 9:38
  We
• 9:38
  have
• 9:38
  some
• 9:39
  additional
• 9:39
  levels
• 9:39
  of
• 9:39
  that,
• 9:40
  but
• 9:40
  this
• 9:40
  won't
• 9:40
  cost
• 9:40
  you
• 9:40
  a
• 9:41
  dime.
• 9:41
  We'll
• 9:41
  put
• 9:42
  it
• 9:42
  in
• 9:42
  the
• 9:42
  show
• 9:42
  notes.
• 9:42
  Again,
• 9:42
  it's
• 9:43
  financiallyconfidentchristian.com/join.
• 9:47
  And
• 9:47
  when
• 9:47
  you
• 9:47
  get
• 9:48
  those
• 9:48
  cards,
• 9:48
  I
• 9:48
  want
• 9:49
  to
• 9:49
  encourage
• 9:49
  you
• 9:49
  schedule
• 9:50
  one
• 9:50
  money
• 9:51
  huddle
• 9:51
  this
• 9:51
  week.
• 9:52
  Just
• 9:53
  put
• 9:53
  it
• 9:53
  right
• 9:53
  on
• 9:53
  the
• 9:53
  calendar.
• 9:54
  Just
• 9:54
  10
• 9:54
  minutes.
• 9:55
  Like
• 9:55
  I
• 9:55
  said.
• 9:56
  One
• 9:56
  card
• 9:56
  each,
• 9:57
  60
• 9:58
  seconds
• 9:58
  each.
• 9:59
  No
• 9:59
  pontificating,
• 10:00
  no
• 10:00
  speeches,
• 10:01
  no
• 10:01
  long
• 10:02
  drawn
• 10:02
  out
• 10:02
  things,
• 10:03
  no
• 10:04
  fixing,
• 10:04
  just
• 10:04
  listening,
• 10:05
  communicating.
• 10:06
  And
• 10:07
  end
• 10:07
  with
• 10:07
  one
• 10:08
  we
• 10:08
  sentence.
• 10:09
  This
• 10:09
  is
• 10:10
  the
• 10:10
  key
• 10:10
  to
• 10:10
  this.
• 10:11
  This
• 10:12
  week
• 10:12
  we
• 10:12
  will.
• 10:12
  And
• 10:13
  here's
• 10:13
  one
• 10:13
  of
• 10:13
  the
• 10:13
  things
• 10:13
  I
• 10:13
  want
• 10:13
  to
• 10:13
  encourage
• 10:14
  you
• 10:14
  to
• 10:14
  do.
• 10:14
  If
• 10:15
  you
• 10:15
  go
• 10:15
  get
• 10:15
  those
• 10:15
  cards
• 10:16
  and
• 10:16
  you
• 10:16
  join
• 10:16
  our
• 10:16
  community,
• 10:17
  put
• 10:18
  in
• 10:18
  that
• 10:18
  there's
• 10:19
  a
• 10:19
  chat
• 10:19
  in
• 10:19
  there
• 10:19
  this
• 10:20
  week
• 10:20
  we
• 10:20
  will.
• 10:20
  And
• 10:21
  share
• 10:21
  those
• 10:21
  things
• 10:21
  with
• 10:21
  other
• 10:22
  people
• 10:22
  in
• 10:22
  the
• 10:22
  community
• 10:22
  because
• 10:23
  we
• 10:23
  can
• 10:23
  all
• 10:24
  benefit
• 10:24
  from
• 10:25
  that.
• 10:25
  So
• 10:25
  I'm
• 10:26
  going
• 10:26
  to
• 10:26
  encourage
• 10:26
  you
• 10:26
  right
• 10:26
  now
• 10:26
  to
• 10:27
  go
• 10:27
  do
• 10:27
  that.
• 10:27
  Once
• 10:27
  you
• 10:27
  get
• 10:28
  those
• 10:28
  cards,
• 10:28
  set
• 10:29
  aside
• 10:29
  those
• 10:29
  10
• 10:29
  minutes
• 10:30
  and
• 10:30
  tell
• 10:30
  me
• 10:30
  what's
• 10:31
  going
• 10:31
  on
• 10:31
  in
• 10:31
  your
• 10:31
  life.
• 10:32
  Let's
• 10:32
  get
• 10:32
  to
• 10:33
  our
• 10:33
  Bible
• 10:33
  verse
• 10:33
  today.
• 10:33
  I
• 10:34
  always
• 10:34
  want
• 10:34
  to
• 10:34
  ground
• 10:34
  us
• 10:35
  in
• 10:35
  Scripture.
• 10:36
  And
• 10:36
  this
• 10:36
  one
• 10:36
  comes
• 10:37
  to
• 10:37
  us
• 10:37
  from
• 10:37
  the
• 10:37
  Book
• 10:37
  of
• 10:37
  James,
• 10:38
  chapter
• 10:39
  one,
• 10:39
  verse
• 10:40
  19.
• 10:41
  My
• 10:41
  dear
• 10:42
  brothers
• 10:42
  and
• 10:42
  sisters,
• 10:44
  take
• 10:44
  note
• 10:44
  of
• 10:44
  this.
• 10:45
  Everyone
• 10:46
  should
• 10:46
  be
• 10:47
  quick
• 10:47
  to
• 10:47
  listen,
• 10:48
  slow
• 10:49
  to
• 10:49
  speak,
• 10:50
  and
• 10:50
  slow
• 10:51
  to
• 10:51
  become
• 10:51
  angry.
• 10:52
  Now
• 10:52
  listen,
• 10:53
  I'm
• 10:53
  going
• 10:53
  to
• 10:53
  read
• 10:53
  that
• 10:53
  again
• 10:54
  because
• 10:54
  you
• 10:55
  may
• 10:55
  have
• 10:55
  kind
• 10:55
  of
• 10:55
  tuned
• 10:55
  that
• 10:55
  out,
• 10:56
  but
• 10:56
  I
• 10:56
  want
• 10:56
  you
• 10:56
  to
• 10:56
  listen
• 10:56
  to
• 10:57
  what
• 10:57
  this
• 10:57
  says
• 10:57
  because
• 10:58
  James
• 10:58
  just
• 10:59
  nails
• 10:59
  it
• 11:00
  again.
• 11:01
  My
• 11:01
  dear
• 11:01
  brothers
• 11:02
  and
• 11:02
  sisters,
• 11:03
  take
• 11:03
  note
• 11:04
  of
• 11:04
  this.
• 11:04
  What
• 11:04
  is
• 11:04
  he
• 11:05
  saying?
• 11:05
  Pay
• 11:05
  attention.
• 11:07
  Everyone
• 11:07
  should
• 11:08
  be
• 11:08
  quick
• 11:08
  to
• 11:09
  listen,
• 11:10
  slow
• 11:10
  to
• 11:10
  speak,
• 11:12
  and
• 11:12
  slow
• 11:12
  to
• 11:12
  become
• 11:13
  angry.
• 11:14
  See,
• 11:15
  money
• 11:15
  peace
• 11:15
  starts
• 11:16
  when
• 11:16
  you
• 11:16
  listen
• 11:17
  first
• 11:18
  and
• 11:18
  you
• 11:18
  lower
• 11:19
  that
• 11:19
  temperature.
• 11:19
  That's
• 11:20
  right,
• 11:20
  from
• 11:20
  the
• 11:20
  Bible.
• 11:21
  Well,
• 11:21
  how
• 11:21
  about
• 11:21
  we
• 11:22
  pray
• 11:22
  together?
• 11:23
  Heavenly
• 11:24
  Father,
• 11:25
  I
• 11:25
  lift
• 11:25
  up
• 11:26
  the
• 11:26
  marriage
• 11:26
  represented
• 11:27
  by
• 11:27
  the
• 11:27
  person
• 11:28
  listening
• 11:28
  right
• 11:28
  now.
• 11:30
  You
• 11:30
  know
• 11:30
  the
• 11:30
  tension,
• 11:32
  you
• 11:32
  know
• 11:32
  the
• 11:32
  fear,
• 11:33
  and
• 11:33
  you
• 11:33
  know
• 11:33
  the
• 11:33
  words
• 11:34
  that
• 11:34
  have
• 11:34
  landed
• 11:34
  hard
• 11:35
  in
• 11:35
  their
• 11:35
  relationships.
• 11:37
  So
• 11:37
  Lord,
• 11:37
  I
• 11:37
  just
• 11:38
  ask
• 11:38
  right
• 11:38
  now
• 11:38
  that
• 11:38
  yout
• 11:38
  would
• 11:39
  bring
• 11:39
  youg
• 11:39
  peace
• 11:39
  into
• 11:40
  their
• 11:40
  home
• 11:40
  this
• 11:40
  very
• 11:41
  week.
• 11:42
  Soften
• 11:43
  their
• 11:43
  hearts,
• 11:43
  Lord,
• 11:43
  and
• 11:44
  help
• 11:44
  them
• 11:44
  see
• 11:45
  their
• 11:45
  spouses
• 11:45
  as
• 11:45
  a
• 11:46
  partner,
• 11:47
  not
• 11:47
  an
• 11:47
  enemy.
• 11:49
  Give
• 11:49
  them
• 11:49
  the
• 11:49
  strength
• 11:50
  to
• 11:50
  listen
• 11:50
  first,
• 11:51
  to
• 11:51
  speak
• 11:52
  gently,
• 11:53
  and
• 11:54
  to
• 11:54
  choose
• 11:54
  understanding
• 11:55
  over
• 11:55
  winning.
• 11:57
  And
• 11:57
  Lord,
• 11:57
  we
• 11:58
  just
• 11:58
  ask
• 11:58
  that
• 11:58
  you
• 11:58
  will
• 11:58
  replace
• 11:59
  anxiety
• 11:59
  with
• 12:00
  your
• 12:00
  assurance
• 12:01
  and
• 12:02
  just
• 12:02
  heal
• 12:02
  what
• 12:02
  money
• 12:03
  stress
• 12:03
  has
• 12:03
  wounded
• 12:04
  and
• 12:04
  rebuild
• 12:05
  that
• 12:05
  trust
• 12:05
  through
• 12:06
  small,
• 12:06
  steady
• 12:07
  steps.
• 12:09
  And
• 12:09
  we
• 12:09
  ask
• 12:09
  this
• 12:10
  in
• 12:10
  Jesus
• 12:11
  name.
• 12:12
  Amen.
• 12:14
  Friend,
• 12:14
  I
• 12:14
  want
• 12:14
  to
• 12:14
  encourage
• 12:15
  you
• 12:15
  right
• 12:15
  now.
• 12:16
  You
• 12:17
  can't
• 12:17
  fix
• 12:17
  everything
• 12:18
  today.
• 12:18
  I
• 12:18
  wish
• 12:19
  I
• 12:19
  could
• 12:19
  tell
• 12:19
  you
• 12:19
  I
• 12:19
  had
• 12:19
  a
• 12:20
  magic
• 12:20
  way
• 12:20
  to
• 12:20
  do
• 12:20
  that.
• 12:20
  I
• 12:21
  don't
• 12:21
  have
• 12:21
  any
• 12:21
  spell
• 12:22
  to
• 12:22
  do
• 12:22
  that.
• 12:23
  But
• 12:23
  what
• 12:23
  you
• 12:24
  can
• 12:24
  do
• 12:24
  today
• 12:24
  is
• 12:24
  you
• 12:24
  can
• 12:25
  make
• 12:25
  the
• 12:25
  next
• 12:25
  talk
• 12:26
  safer.
• 12:27
  This,
• 12:28
  what
• 12:28
  we've
• 12:28
  talked
• 12:28
  about
• 12:28
  today,
• 12:29
  can
• 12:29
  make
• 12:29
  that
• 12:29
  next
• 12:30
  talk
• 12:30
  safer.
• 12:32
  And
• 12:32
  if
• 12:32
  you've
• 12:32
  got
• 12:32
  a
• 12:33
  question
• 12:33
  for
• 12:33
  this
• 12:33
  show,
• 12:33
  I
• 12:34
  am
• 12:34
  all
• 12:34
  about
• 12:34
  answering
• 12:35
  questions.
• 12:35
  You
• 12:35
  can
• 12:35
  see
• 12:36
  that
• 12:36
  fuels
• 12:36
  what
• 12:36
  I
• 12:36
  do
• 12:36
  here.
• 12:37
  If
• 12:37
  you've
• 12:38
  got
• 12:38
  a
• 12:38
  question
• 12:38
  for
• 12:38
  this
• 12:38
  show,
• 12:39
  go
• 12:39
  to
• 12:39
  financiallyconfidentchristian.com/question.
• 12:43
  That'll
• 12:44
  be
• 12:44
  in
• 12:44
  the
• 12:44
  show
• 12:44
  notes,
• 12:45
  but
• 12:45
  I'm
• 12:45
  going
• 12:45
  to
• 12:45
  give
• 12:45
  it
• 12:45
  to
• 12:45
  you
• 12:45
  again
• 12:46
  right
• 12:46
  now
• 12:46
  if
• 12:46
  you
• 12:46
  want
• 12:46
  to
• 12:46
  write
• 12:47
  this
• 12:47
  down.
• 12:48
  Financiallyconfidentchristian.com/question
• 12:52
  thank
• 12:52
  you
• 12:52
  so
• 12:53
  much
• 12:53
  for
• 12:53
  joining
• 12:53
  me
• 12:54
  today.
• 12:54
  Stay
• 12:54
  financially
• 12:55
  savvy.
• 12:56
  God
• 12:56
  bless
• 12:56
  you.
• 12:57
  And
• 12:57
  you
• 12:57
  have
• 12:58
  a
• 12:58
  great
• 12:58
  day
• 12:58
  today.
• 12:59
  Make
• 12:59
  sure
• 12:59
  you
• 12:59
  join
• 12:59
  me
• 12:59
  again
• 13:00
  tomorrow
• 13:00
  on
• 13:00
  the
• 13:00
  show.