Latest / The Mental Healness Podcast / Why do narcissists send you songs and videos when you're mad

Transcript

Why do narcissists send you songs and videos when you're mad · The Mental Healness Podcast

• 0:01
  What is going on, beautiful people?
• 0:03
  Today we're going to be talking about why narcissists send you
• 0:06
  songs and video clips and poetry when they're trying to express
• 0:11
  themselves. When they're when you are mad at
• 0:13
  them or they're trying to get back into your good graces.
• 0:15
  If you're new here, my name is Lee Hammock.
• 0:17
  I'm a clinically diagnosed narcissist and welcome to
• 0:19
  another episode of The Narcissist Code.
• 0:38
  Welcome back, welcome back, welcome back y'all.
• 0:40
  I don't know about y'all but I love my intro.
• 0:42
  I was just, you know, the intro gives me hype and whatnot.
• 0:45
  But yes. Songs and.
• 0:47
  Videos and. All that.
• 0:49
  Other good jazz why do? Narcissistic people continuously
• 0:52
  want to send you that. Type of stuff.
• 0:54
  Like whenever you are mad at them, right?
• 0:56
  Whenever you're mad. Or you're.
• 0:59
  You are ready to break up with them.
• 1:00
  Are you ready to be done with them?
• 1:01
  Why on earth do they send the song to you?
• 1:04
  They send the video. Hey, hey, look, I know that I
• 1:08
  cheated on you. This is you.
• 1:10
  You're reading this y'all yo. This is the the reading voice.
• 1:13
  This is the voice inside of your head when you're reading it.
• 1:17
  Bing, this is how it goes. Bing, you look at it.
• 1:20
  Hey, look, I know you're mad at me right now.
• 1:24
  I know that I'm the last person that you want to hear from.
• 1:28
  But listen to this song, please. It describes exactly how I feel
• 1:32
  exactly. Please listen to Back That Thing
• 1:35
  Up by Juvenile and the Hot. Boys, please.
• 1:38
  Because I would love, love, love for you to back that back that
• 1:43
  thing up right back into. This relationship with me and.
• 1:45
  What I would love for you to back that.
• 1:47
  Thing up into. This relationship, please.
• 1:51
  That's what they'll do to you right there, y'all?
• 1:52
  That's what they'll say, that's what they'll do.
• 1:54
  That's the mindset of a lot of toxic, narcissistic people.
• 1:57
  They will send you these songs because yeah, they don't know
• 1:59
  how to communicate. Let's keep it.
• 2:01
  Hot and ready. Y'all know we always kind of,
• 2:03
  we, we like to keep it hot and ready.
• 2:05
  Like a Little Caesar's pizza over here, right?
• 2:07
  Always hide and ready. We always want to keep it as hot
• 2:09
  and as fresh. They.
• 2:11
  Don't know how to communicate. On a deep.
• 2:13
  Emotional level now. Physically, yeah, Physically
• 2:16
  they can do whatever. Physically, they can do it.
• 2:18
  They can hug you, they can kiss you, they can clap them cheeks,
• 2:21
  they can do all of that type of stuff.
• 2:22
  They can do the physical stuff, but it when it comes to tote the
• 2:25
  toting the load that the load of emotional.
• 2:28
  Labor. They cannot do it.
• 2:30
  On a consistent basis, you know, so when they they can't because
• 2:35
  they don't understand how to express themselves, they'll
• 2:36
  listen to a song, they'll hear a song on the radio.
• 2:39
  They'll see a TikTok video with somebody dancing, look, somebody
• 2:43
  dancing with an apology in the background and stuff like that.
• 2:45
  And they'll send you, they'll look at the song up on Google,
• 2:48
  send you the song. Hey, listen to this song and
• 2:52
  call me when. You finish listening and then we
• 2:53
  can talk. Because this song, it's, it
• 2:56
  explains everything it does. That's why they do it y'all.
• 3:01
  That's why they send you a song or watch this video.
• 3:04
  Please watch this movie. Please read this.
• 3:07
  Poem by. So and so.
• 3:09
  Because I don't. Know how to.
• 3:10
  Communicate with you. That's why they do it.
• 3:13
  And do do a lot of people fall for it?
• 3:16
  Yes, because the song gets you the song that you might be
• 3:20
  listening to. It might.
• 3:21
  It's not going. To be back that thing up unless
• 3:23
  they're trying to joke with you and break the break your
• 3:25
  emotional state to make you. Laugh but the song is going to
• 3:28
  be something touching or filling or asking for forgiveness or
• 3:31
  something like that until the song the singer is going to be
• 3:35
  scream singing in a a beautiful melody about forgiveness and,
• 3:39
  you know, getting, you know, forgiving somebody and giving
• 3:41
  somebody another chance when. Good, good men cheat.
• 3:46
  A good woman. Going to cheat on you?
• 3:48
  A good woman is going to have a baby on you.
• 3:50
  But then. They're going to come back and
• 3:51
  love you. Mostly.
• 3:52
  Anybody. Yeah, yeah.
• 3:53
  Y'all see the ignorance and the. Foolishness that I'm Speaking of
• 3:55
  right now. That's what happens.
• 3:57
  That's part of it right there. They will absolutely do that on
• 4:01
  a consistent basis to mess with your heads.
• 4:03
  And a lot of people don't understand it.
• 4:05
  Like they'll you get a song, you listen to the song, you'll start
• 4:08
  crying and then you'll call the person who sent you the song or
• 4:11
  you'll. Text them back.
• 4:12
  Beautiful song. I watched the video from
• 4:14
  beginning to end and I try. I kind of see your point.
• 4:17
  It's not their. Point.
• 4:19
  It's somebody. Else's point.
• 4:20
  It's somebody else's video, it's somebody else's love song.
• 4:23
  It's somebody else asking for forgiveness.
• 4:25
  On a video. It's somebody else's
• 4:26
  motivational speech. It's somebody else's poem.
• 4:28
  It's not. Their words.
• 4:31
  That's like damn near digital y'all.
• 4:33
  That is digital. Triangulation.
• 4:35
  That is musical. Triangulation.
• 4:37
  You've never heard anybody said it before?
• 4:39
  Dude, I'm. I'm a cop.
• 4:40
  I'm going trademark that right now.
• 4:42
  Digital musical. Triangulation.
• 4:46
  Digital Gaslighting. Musical.
• 4:48
  Gaslighting. That's what they're doing,
• 4:50
  Poetic manipulation. That's that's what they're
• 4:53
  doing. They're using somebody.
• 4:56
  Else's words to get you to feel a certain type of way.
• 4:58
  They're triangulating the Arthur, the the actress, the
• 5:02
  actor in a movie. Or music video or whatever.
• 5:05
  It is that they're sending to you.
• 5:06
  They're using. That to manipulate you to giving
• 5:08
  them another chance or to look past their transgressions.
• 5:11
  Or they're just like, maybe I am grown.
• 5:13
  Maybe everything that you are, everything you've done.
• 5:15
  Maybe it isn't as bad as I thought it was, just maybe it
• 5:19
  isn't. Yes, it is it.
• 5:21
  Is yo it? Is it?
• 5:25
  Absolutely. Is you're not.
• 5:26
  Making it up, you're not like you're not concocting this stuff
• 5:29
  about of nowhere. This is how it goes.
• 5:32
  This is the mindset of the mentality of somebody A.
• 5:34
  Narcissistic person that doesn't know how to communicate.
• 5:36
  With you on an emotional level, they'll send you somebody else's
• 5:39
  words, somebody else's creation, somebody else's creativity, the
• 5:43
  thoughts of somebody else's mind to make it seem like this is how
• 5:45
  they feel, make it seem like this is how they're thinking
• 5:48
  Could it be how they're thinking?
• 5:49
  Yes, I'll say that because I know somebody will see that and
• 5:52
  be like, well, Lee, what? If they're really thinking like
• 5:54
  that, you can't speak for own narcissist.
• 5:57
  You can't speak for own narcissist, Lee.
• 5:59
  What if they're really thinking that?
• 6:00
  Then they can say the damn. Selves then that's the mindset
• 6:04
  that goes. On to a lot of this type of
• 6:05
  stuff out there. It's all manipulation again.
• 6:08
  At the end of the day, that's why I tell people, does it work?
• 6:10
  Yeah, it works because you want the you want to you want it to
• 6:13
  work. You know it works because you
• 6:14
  want it to work. Y'all?
• 6:16
  If you don't want to be these songs in this music video,
• 6:18
  whatever they're sending to you to not work, to work, you know
• 6:21
  what I mean, then you don't have to let them work.
• 6:23
  Yes, They might become aggressive, yes.
• 6:25
  They might become obsessive, yes.
• 6:27
  They might too. They might do that you mean.
• 6:29
  But you have to stand pat. If you want to be done, you have
• 6:31
  to stand pat. Yes, yes.
• 6:34
  Will they also send you music videos and songs and movie
• 6:37
  quotes and things like that to hurt your feelings?
• 6:39
  Absolutely yes. And this is again and again,
• 6:42
  this is a way of, of manipulating using digital,
• 6:45
  digital art or somebody else's creativity to be disrespectful.
• 6:48
  Towards you, right? This is how it goes.
• 6:51
  This is another way that that. Happens right there this.
• 6:53
  Is another way that it happens. They use somebody else's work to
• 6:57
  insult you or belittle you, and guess what happens if you show
• 7:00
  this to somebody else? They can say, well I didn't.
• 7:03
  Say any. Of that I didn't do any of that.
• 7:05
  That wasn't part of what I had going on.
• 7:07
  You mean they they'll just like I I'll.
• 7:09
  Just send them the video. That's not how it really, really
• 7:11
  felt. They can just send them the
• 7:13
  video, send them whatever they want to, and just use it to
• 7:16
  manipulate people with, you know, guess what happens all.
• 7:19
  The time y'all. This is why I tell people
• 7:22
  happens. All the time in these spaces.
• 7:24
  But this this is like. They they can they it's a way
• 7:27
  for them to. Skirt accountability.
• 7:28
  Well, I just. Sent you a song.
• 7:29
  I didn't really. I didn't say anything.
• 7:31
  The song. Those are the song lyrics.
• 7:33
  You know, just I don't want you just because I sing.
• 7:37
  I don't I, I don't want you back.
• 7:39
  You know that song, but. What you said it don't mean it
• 7:42
  now. I don't want you back.
• 7:45
  Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh I don't. Know who's on that song?
• 7:50
  I forgot who's saying that song. Iman Iman and Kurt Robinson and
• 7:56
  Mark. Pass it.
• 7:57
  Oh, there you go. That's what it says.
• 7:59
  They send. You that.
• 7:59
  Song right now. They talking trash to you, It's
• 8:01
  a way for them to escort accountability.
• 8:03
  Look what Lee sent me. Yeah, I sent you a song.
• 8:05
  It's a great song. I just.
• 8:06
  Thought you might. Like to listen to it?
• 8:09
  You said I got plausible deniability right there.
• 8:11
  Because I yeah, I sent. You the song.
• 8:12
  But I didn't say the. Words see when it doesn't, when
• 8:15
  it doesn't. Benefit them, they don't take
• 8:16
  credit for it. You see, they'll take credit for
• 8:19
  the good stuff. Yeah, I sent that.
• 8:20
  I sent that beautiful song by Luke.
• 8:23
  Who's that? Who's that heart?
• 8:24
  It's something called Hard to Love by I think.
• 8:26
  Sam Who? Who sings Hard to Love?
• 8:29
  Dang it. Yeah.
• 8:30
  Hard to Love. That's my song right there.
• 8:32
  Hard to. I think it's Sam Hunt.
• 8:35
  Oh, it's Lee Bryce. Lee Bryce.
• 8:36
  Sings Hard to love Lee Bryce. Yeah, I just.
• 8:38
  Put it together. Hard to love.
• 8:39
  I sent you hard to love. Because I know I'm hard to love.
• 8:41
  You know I know I'm hard to love.
• 8:44
  Listen. To the lyrics of it, I'm
• 8:45
  insensitive. I had the tendency to pay more
• 8:48
  attention to the things that I need.
• 8:51
  Sometimes I drain too much. Sometimes I test your trust.
• 8:54
  Sometimes I don't know why you stay with me.
• 8:57
  I'm hard to love hard. To love y'all Can't Sing but
• 8:59
  that's my junk though. But I sent you that song because
• 9:02
  I am hard to love. Lee Bryson Lee Hammock.
• 9:05
  We're, we're, we're. We're.
• 9:06
  Commingling, they'll say yeah, but you see, I can take credit
• 9:11
  for that right there. Y'all You see how that makes
• 9:13
  sense for me to? Take credit in that situation
• 9:15
  because that's that's. Beneficial to me.
• 9:17
  In some way, shape or form, right?
• 9:19
  You see how I can take you? You can use that to my.
• 9:21
  Benefit because. That happens, they'll use it to
• 9:24
  the. Benefit another reason y'all and
• 9:26
  I'll wrap this thing up. I know I own like 11/12/13
• 9:28
  minutes. This is why I'm trying to Max
• 9:29
  Max out another. Reason is because it's the.
• 9:31
  Easy way out. It doesn't take a lot of.
• 9:35
  Emotional energy to. Send somebody.
• 9:38
  Else's stuff. It doesn't take a lot of
• 9:41
  emotion. I can disconnect from it as
• 9:43
  well. It's the easy way.
• 9:44
  I can send you a. Love song if it.
• 9:47
  If it doesn't work, you're it's. Not like you're.
• 9:49
  Rejecting me? You're rejecting the artist.
• 9:51
  You know you don't like the song.
• 9:52
  Just because you don't like the song doesn't mean you don't like
• 9:54
  me, you see? How it because?
• 9:57
  It doesn't serve me in that. Space, right?
• 9:58
  There. It doesn't benefit me in that
• 10:00
  space right there to do that. So I'm just like, yeah.
• 10:02
  Look, you can see. How it goes right here, You can
• 10:04
  see how it's happening right here.
• 10:07
  That's part of it. So that's why I tell people in
• 10:10
  these spaces that this is how it goes.
• 10:12
  This is how it's going to keep happening.
• 10:14
  This is the the the end result of a lot of things.
• 10:16
  That happens. They can take the easy way out
• 10:18
  to send you songs and and videos and music and stuff like that
• 10:21
  and if it. Works they're.
• 10:23
  Going to keep doing it because why wouldn't they?
• 10:25
  If it, if it's work, if all I got, if I like look, if all I.
• 10:28
  Got to do. If I can.
• 10:29
  Cheat on you and all I. Got to do is send you a love
• 10:30
  song to get. Back with you.
• 10:32
  Why wouldn't I do that if I got to send you a music video?
• 10:36
  Or something like that. Why wouldn't I do that if I got
• 10:38
  to send you a poet? A poet?
• 10:39
  Some poetry? Why?
• 10:40
  Wouldn't I do that? If that's the it's easy.
• 10:42
  If it. If it's easy, why would I?
• 10:44
  Why would I take the hardware out?
• 10:45
  Why would I take the hard route y'all?
• 10:47
  If if I'm coming to the end of the path and it says easy Rd.
• 10:51
  music. Music, songs, videos.
• 10:53
  Get your get back. Your ex get them forgive you for
• 10:56
  cheating or hard. Road actually ask for
• 10:58
  forgiveness, Go to therapy. You maybe may or may not get
• 11:02
  them back man give. Me the give me the easy stuff,
• 11:04
  why would I? Do the hard stuff.
• 11:06
  It doesn't have anything to do. With your value y'all, I'm just
• 11:08
  telling you. So anyways, y'all, I hope y'all
• 11:10
  enjoyed this episode. I hope you hope you stay
• 11:12
  empowered. Of course y'all see the courses
• 11:15
  in the video, the courses in the communities, Join those.
• 11:19
  Check out my courses courses.mentalillness.net and I
• 11:22
  will see y'all later. Peace out y'all make sure y'all
• 11:25
  subscribe. To this channel as well, hope
• 11:28
  you have a great day and I'm out peace.