Latest / Hurdle with Emily Abbate / #HURDLEMOMENT: How To Make A 5-Year Plan & Beat Overwhelm
Transcript
- 0:00Speaker 1: It really requires a lot of self reflection and a
- 0:03Speaker 1: lot of self awareness to know, like, well, what do
- 0:05Speaker 1: I really want for myself in five years? How does
- 0:09Speaker 1: the answer to that question now guide me in the
- 0:11Speaker 1: direction of where I want to go?
- 0:27Speaker 2: Hey, everybody, Emily a body here. You are listening to
- 0:31Speaker 2: another installment of Hurdle Moment from Hurdle, a wellness focused
- 0:35Speaker 2: podcast where I chat with everyone from your favorite athletes
- 0:38Speaker 2: to top experts and industry CEOs about their highest highs,
- 0:41Speaker 2: toughest moments, and everything in between. We all go through
- 0:45Speaker 2: hurdles in life, and my goal through these discussions is
- 0:48Speaker 2: to empower you to better navigate yours and move with
- 0:51Speaker 2: intention so that you can stride towards your own big
- 0:54Speaker 2: potential and of course have some fun along the way.
- 0:59Speaker 2: For today day's episode, I'm chatting with Liz Beecroft. She
- 1:03Speaker 2: is a psychotherapist for athletes and creatives based here in
- 1:08Speaker 2: New York City, and today we are tackling the topic
- 1:11Speaker 2: of how to create a five year plan, how to
- 1:15Speaker 2: navigate the anxiety that comes with creating a five year plan.
- 1:20Speaker 2: I have you all on my dms all the time
- 1:23Speaker 2: talking about strategies.
- 1:25Speaker 3: You know, I love a good planning moment.
- 1:27Speaker 2: I have spoken about on the show how I love
- 1:30Speaker 2: to do quarterly summits with myself to go over the
- 1:33Speaker 2: goals that I have where I'm at, do a little
- 1:35Speaker 2: bit of a self audit, and so it's no wonder
- 1:38Speaker 2: that I asked Liz to come on the show and
- 1:41Speaker 2: give me her input. We talk about how to navigate
- 1:44Speaker 2: planning without getting overwhelmed, as well as what to do
- 1:48Speaker 2: when you do feel stuck, when you do feel like
- 1:51Speaker 2: it's just way too much to handle, and why acknowledging
- 1:54Speaker 2: that feeling can be the first step to getting to
- 1:58Speaker 2: where you actually want to go.
- 2:00Speaker 1: Oh.
- 2:00Speaker 2: We also talk about how feelings can play a really
- 2:04Speaker 2: big part in this and the importance of embracing life
- 2:07Speaker 2: as it happens, being honest with yourself about where you're
- 2:10Speaker 2: at currently and ultimately again where you want to go. Now.
- 2:15Speaker 3: Of course, guy do a little shout out.
- 2:17Speaker 2: This episode is actually coming out on Liz's birthday, So
- 2:20Speaker 2: happy birthday to Liz, her and I fellow Gemini's and
- 2:25Speaker 2: a little bit.
- 2:25Speaker 3: Of housekeeping here.
- 2:26Speaker 2: I'm hosting a live podcast with my friends at Nike
- 2:30Speaker 2: on Global Running Day next week here in New York,
- 2:32Speaker 2: I'm going to share all of those details in my
- 2:35Speaker 2: Instagram story today when this episode goes live on May
- 2:39Speaker 2: thirty first, and as a part of that, I'm going
- 2:42Speaker 2: to be answering your running questions from gear to tactics,
- 2:47Speaker 2: training to warm ups, you name it, with the help
- 2:49Speaker 2: of Nike running.
- 2:51Speaker 3: Coach Jess Woods.
- 2:52Speaker 2: If you have a question you want us to answer,
- 2:54Speaker 2: click on over to the show notes and click leave
- 2:56Speaker 2: me a voice message and you might just get life.
- 3:00Speaker 2: I would love to Nothing's off limits. Make sure you're
- 3:03Speaker 2: following along with Hurdle. Over at Hurdle Podcast. I am
- 3:05Speaker 2: over at Emily a Body and with that, let's get
- 3:09Speaker 2: to hurdling. Today, I am sitting down with Liz Beecroft.
- 3:18Speaker 2: She is a New York City based psychotherapist. She works
- 3:22Speaker 2: with athletes and creatives.
- 3:23Speaker 3: How you doing, Liz, I'm good.
- 3:25Speaker 1: How are you?
- 3:26Speaker 2: I'm good. I am so excited to have you on
- 3:29Speaker 2: the show. We recently worked together on an article that
- 3:31Speaker 2: I wrote for Wondermind. Did you always foresee yourself getting
- 3:35Speaker 2: into this line of work?
- 3:37Speaker 1: No, I actually really wanted to be an orthodonist because
- 3:41Speaker 1: I had braces like four times. Even as an adult,
- 3:44Speaker 1: I had braces, and I don't know why I thought
- 3:47Speaker 1: that was my path in life, but I ended up
- 3:50Speaker 1: ultimately hating organic chemistry, and then I changed my major
- 3:54Speaker 1: to psychology. And now you know, in hindsight, I look
- 3:58Speaker 1: back and I'm like, it makes a lot of sense.
- 4:00Speaker 1: So why I ended up where I am now Because
- 4:02Speaker 1: in my private practice, I primarily work with athletes and creatives.
- 4:06Speaker 1: And it's so funny. Last night I was in a
- 4:08Speaker 1: session with my therapists and we were talking a lot
- 4:11Speaker 1: about my high school basketball coach and how there's a
- 4:14Speaker 1: lot of toxicity that had happened. So full circle, I'm
- 4:19Speaker 1: now helping athletes who hopefully don't have any toxic coaches
- 4:22Speaker 1: or people in their.
- 4:23Speaker 3: Life, hopefully not. I love that.
- 4:27Speaker 2: Right off the bat, you kind of brought attention to
- 4:29Speaker 2: the fact that as a therapist, you work with a therapist.
- 4:34Speaker 2: We hear of this saying so often even coaches need coaches.
- 4:38Speaker 2: Why do you think that it's so important that you yourself
- 4:41Speaker 2: also seek out help and attention?
- 4:44Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean because at the end of the day,
- 4:46Speaker 1: we're all human beings with emotions and a limited capacity
- 4:51Speaker 1: for what we can take in, and so you know,
- 4:53Speaker 1: our jobs and nature of our jobs, we're hearing a lot,
- 4:57Speaker 1: you know, from people, whether it's the highs, the low
- 5:00Speaker 1: those the traumatic experiences, and it's hard to not you know,
- 5:05Speaker 1: let that sit with you outside of you know, sessions.
- 5:11Speaker 1: So to have an outlet for myself is super important
- 5:14Speaker 1: because it really allows me to show up for my
- 5:16Speaker 1: clients in a way that I'm you know, healthy mentally.
- 5:21Speaker 2: Tell us a little bit about opening your own private practice.
- 5:25Speaker 1: Yeah, so I actually, prior to private practice, worked for
- 5:29Speaker 1: a foster care organization for five years and once I
- 5:35Speaker 1: got my LCSW license, that's when I decided it was
- 5:38Speaker 1: time to go into private practice. And so I was
- 5:40Speaker 1: kind of doing both at the same time, and then
- 5:42Speaker 1: eventually during COVID was when I made the leap to
- 5:45Speaker 1: be full time private practice. And I also do a
- 5:48Speaker 1: lot of work with sneakers and streetwear and sports in general.
- 5:53Speaker 1: It's just a passion of mine. I was an athlete myself,
- 5:56Speaker 1: and that's kind of where I pivoted my private practice
- 5:59Speaker 1: into working with creatives and athletes because something I'm passionate about,
- 6:03Speaker 1: but it's also something I really understand just as a
- 6:07Speaker 1: therapist can help those people.
- 6:09Speaker 2: So yeah, that's really cool. Though, that you're finding a
- 6:12Speaker 2: way to connect your passions. For those that may not
- 6:15Speaker 2: be familiar with the term LCSW and what goes into
- 6:20Speaker 2: gaining that certification, you want to give them a little
- 6:23Speaker 2: bit of intel on that.
- 6:24Speaker 1: Yeah, for sure. So my master's is in social work.
- 6:27Speaker 1: I have a MSW, and once you graduate, you have
- 6:32Speaker 1: to take an exam depending on the state that you're
- 6:34Speaker 1: in to obtain your LMSW license, which is your licensed
- 6:38Speaker 1: Master social Work. And then if you want to do
- 6:42Speaker 1: more clinical work or open your own private practice, you
- 6:45Speaker 1: really kind of need your LCSW, which is your Licensed
- 6:48Speaker 1: Clinical Social Worker license. So it takes about three years
- 6:53Speaker 1: from when you get your LMSW until you can get
- 6:55Speaker 1: your LCSW. You need three thousand clinical hours and one
- 6:59Speaker 1: hundred supervisory hours that all have to be signed off on,
- 7:02Speaker 1: and then a whole lot of studying that goes into
- 7:04Speaker 1: taking this exam. And if you pass your smooth sailing
- 7:09Speaker 1: and luckily I passed on my first try.
- 7:12Speaker 3: Wow, that's awesome.
- 7:13Speaker 2: So I love to hear that you had an idea,
- 7:15Speaker 2: you pivoted a little bit along the way, but you
- 7:18Speaker 2: found yourself and being able to do this work.
- 7:20Speaker 3: That from the way that you speak about it seems
- 7:22Speaker 3: really fulfilling.
- 7:24Speaker 1: Yeah, I love it, and I think, you know, even
- 7:26Speaker 1: when I was a teenager, like I didn't even realize
- 7:29Speaker 1: this was something I could do, you know. And even
- 7:32Speaker 1: now I'm going to be thirty two literally next week
- 7:35Speaker 1: and trying to just still navigate my career and learning
- 7:39Speaker 1: new things about how you can really combine your passions
- 7:42Speaker 1: into what you do is a really beautiful thing.
- 7:46Speaker 2: So today we're here to talk about planning, specifically the
- 7:50Speaker 2: anxieties and all of the feelings that can come up
- 7:53Speaker 2: with creating what we often refer to as a five
- 7:55Speaker 2: year plan. I feel like it's like one of the
- 7:57Speaker 2: first questions that comes into play when you're talking to
- 8:02Speaker 2: anyone about business, but also bigger than business, even your relationships,
- 8:06Speaker 2: your friendships. I think during COVID we heard this a lot.
- 8:09Speaker 2: It's like, where do you want to be a few
- 8:11Speaker 2: years down the road, And so I wanted to bring
- 8:15Speaker 2: you in to talk about just the concept of planning
- 8:18Speaker 2: and how we can get over some of the hurdles
- 8:21Speaker 2: that go hand in hand with that. So do you
- 8:24Speaker 2: hear this a lot in your practice, people having anxiety
- 8:26Speaker 2: about coming up with some sort of a plan.
- 8:28Speaker 1: Yes, quite often actually, especially with creatives, because that work
- 8:35Speaker 1: there is such a change right now happening, you know,
- 8:38Speaker 1: whether it's with NFTs or AI, and there's a lot
- 8:41Speaker 1: of anxiety just in how those new mediums can be
- 8:45Speaker 1: integrated or potentially harmful for a creative Right.
- 8:49Speaker 2: So, when someone is asked about creating some sort of
- 8:54Speaker 2: a plan, why is anxiety a frequent buy product of
- 9:01Speaker 2: hearing that question?
- 9:03Speaker 1: Yeah, Well, when you think of anxiety, what it really
- 9:06Speaker 1: stems down to is getting your thoughts either caught up
- 9:10Speaker 1: into the future or into the past in a moment
- 9:12Speaker 1: where you don't have any control over. It often brings
- 9:17Speaker 1: up a lot of fear, nervousness, worry, and you're no
- 9:21Speaker 1: longer present in that moment. And so when you think
- 9:24Speaker 1: of a five year plan, you're really forcing yourself to
- 9:26Speaker 1: think into the future, which can bring up a lot
- 9:29Speaker 1: of unknowns, a lot of uncertainties, questions that we might
- 9:33Speaker 1: not have answered. And I think too, it really requires
- 9:36Speaker 1: a lot of self reflection and a lot of self
- 9:39Speaker 1: awareness to know, like, well, what do I really want
- 9:41Speaker 1: for myself? And in five years, how does the answer
- 9:45Speaker 1: to that question now guide me in the direction of
- 9:48Speaker 1: where I want to go. And I think for a
- 9:50Speaker 1: lot of people, like we are always evolving, we all,
- 9:53Speaker 1: we all are always growing. That like, sometimes we put
- 9:58Speaker 1: a level of concreteness this five year plan that makes
- 10:01Speaker 1: it seem like we have to stick by exactly that
- 10:03Speaker 1: plan and not give ourselves the grace to acknowledge that
- 10:07Speaker 1: it can change. And it's okay if it does.
- 10:10Speaker 2: Yeah, So, what I'm hearing you say is that oftentimes
- 10:14Speaker 2: that anxiety can become a roadblock, can make people feel stuck.
- 10:19Speaker 2: What can be the benefit of acknowledging that you feel
- 10:23Speaker 2: stuck in that moment?
- 10:24Speaker 1: Yeah? I think the benefit of that is it gives
- 10:27Speaker 1: you then the openness to really decide where you want
- 10:32Speaker 1: to go. People feel stuck, I think because we often
- 10:34Speaker 1: feel like we have to have an answer, we have
- 10:36Speaker 1: to know exactly what it is we want to do,
- 10:39Speaker 1: and sometimes we don't, you know, and that's perfectly fine.
- 10:42Speaker 1: But feeling stuck, you're feeling like you need to be
- 10:47Speaker 1: on a path a certain way A plus B equal
- 10:50Speaker 1: c or one plus one equals two. And what happens
- 10:54Speaker 1: is that means then our decision making comes into play.
- 10:57Speaker 1: You know, how we network comes into play. The you know,
- 11:02Speaker 1: specifically in our career. Whatever the five year plan entails, like,
- 11:05Speaker 1: the decisions that we make have to kind of fit
- 11:08Speaker 1: what we mold out for ourselves, and so feeling stuck
- 11:11Speaker 1: could sometimes even be due to following what society might
- 11:17Speaker 1: tell us we should do, or what our parents or
- 11:19Speaker 1: friends might be telling us we should do. But maybe
- 11:23Speaker 1: subconsciously it's not what we want to do and we're
- 11:25Speaker 1: being pulled in another direction, and that can make you
- 11:28Speaker 1: feel stuck, or it could just be because you genuinely
- 11:30Speaker 1: just don't know what it is you want. You're open
- 11:34Speaker 1: to new opportunities, and that's a really beautiful thing.
- 11:37Speaker 2: Yeah, being open is definitely beautiful, and also understanding that
- 11:41Speaker 2: you have the opportunity to do some self inquisition to
- 11:44Speaker 2: figure out what happens next.
- 11:46Speaker 3: Right, So what I'm hearing you say.
- 11:48Speaker 2: Is that this then becomes an opportunity to do that
- 11:53Speaker 2: level of self inquiry, to sit down and start to
- 11:57Speaker 2: hash out what feels right for you.
- 12:01Speaker 1: Yeah, I think it's really important to acknowledge like just
- 12:05Speaker 1: your overall identity of who you are as a human
- 12:08Speaker 1: being a person, because you know, oftentimes and when I
- 12:13Speaker 1: think of a five year plan, my mind immediately goes
- 12:16Speaker 1: to career, but that doesn't necessarily have to mean career,
- 12:20Speaker 1: And I think it's important that it doesn't always just
- 12:23Speaker 1: mean career, because our identities are more than just what
- 12:26Speaker 1: we do as our careers, and so when we think
- 12:28Speaker 1: of our five year plan, it's also important to think
- 12:30Speaker 1: of all those aspects of our identities. Are we a mother,
- 12:35Speaker 1: a sister, a son, a brother? Like? Do we like
- 12:38Speaker 1: to snowboard? Do we like to bake? Do we like
- 12:40Speaker 1: to play basketball?
- 12:41Speaker 2: Like?
- 12:41Speaker 1: What else do we do in our lives that we
- 12:44Speaker 1: tie ourselves to that brings us fulfillment? And how do
- 12:48Speaker 1: we also integrate that into the plan, Because feeling stuck
- 12:52Speaker 1: can sometimes also mean like you're not being able to
- 12:54Speaker 1: cater to those other pieces of who you are.
- 12:57Speaker 3: Right.
- 12:57Speaker 2: I think it's also like being honest with yourself, right,
- 13:00Speaker 2: and understanding that there are so many different ways that
- 13:03Speaker 2: each and every single one of us identify. So this
- 13:07Speaker 2: then goes back to perhaps and evaluation of your values
- 13:12Speaker 2: and what your priorities are. If your priority again we
- 13:16Speaker 2: wrapped about you being in New York, but like maybe
- 13:18Speaker 2: wanting to get out of here at some point soon? Okay, Well,
- 13:21Speaker 2: if your priority is in five years to be living
- 13:24Speaker 2: in the Connecticut suburbs. Then you have to think about
- 13:27Speaker 2: the other things that are within your control so that
- 13:30Speaker 2: you can get to where you want to be five
- 13:32Speaker 2: years down the line.
- 13:33Speaker 3: But bigger than that, something that I've.
- 13:35Speaker 2: Been doing a lot of lately is asking myself how
- 13:39Speaker 2: I want to feel by X. So let's bring that
- 13:43Speaker 2: into the equation. If we're thinking about a five year plan,
- 13:46Speaker 2: how does it serve you or maybe it doesn't to
- 13:50Speaker 2: think about how you want to feel.
- 13:52Speaker 1: I think that is incredibly important because what that does
- 13:56Speaker 1: is it really helps you understand how you or thoughts
- 14:01Speaker 1: and your actions align with what moods or emotions come
- 14:06Speaker 1: up for you. So you know, like, for example, if
- 14:09Speaker 1: I'm consistently putting myself in a situation and being around
- 14:12Speaker 1: people that I know our draining that I don't really
- 14:16Speaker 1: necessarily enjoy being around, that's going to make me feel
- 14:19Speaker 1: maybe discouraged right or sad, which then means in five
- 14:25Speaker 1: years I'm continuing to stay around those people, that's not
- 14:28Speaker 1: going to align with that goal of how do I
- 14:30Speaker 1: want to feel in five years if that feeling is
- 14:33Speaker 1: not discouraged or sad. So it's really trying to. I
- 14:37Speaker 1: think it helps bring your goals into alignment with the
- 14:42Speaker 1: emotions that you want to evote, because if those don't align,
- 14:49Speaker 1: then the chances of them happening are reduced.
- 14:54Speaker 2: And it's interesting to hear you say that because I
- 14:57Speaker 2: don't necessarily believe that the first thought to okay in
- 15:02Speaker 2: five years, I want to feel X is doing an
- 15:06Speaker 2: inventory about what's in your circle right now. You know,
- 15:10Speaker 2: so often on the POD I feel like this is
- 15:12Speaker 2: the theme of twenty twenty three. I'm talking about how
- 15:15Speaker 2: energy finds like energy, and so being honest with yourself
- 15:19Speaker 2: about what's surrounding you in this moment can be a
- 15:22Speaker 2: pretty good indicator of what's available to you as you
- 15:26Speaker 2: move forward.
- 15:27Speaker 1: I think boundaries is a big theme in any type
- 15:31Speaker 1: of plan, right because you have to have healthy boundaries.
- 15:35Speaker 1: You can't have two porous boundaries or too rigid, because
- 15:38Speaker 1: you know, you still need to be open to opportunities
- 15:41Speaker 1: that might not fit within that ideal plan, but at
- 15:44Speaker 1: the same time not allowing the unnecessary things that don't
- 15:51Speaker 1: align with those goals to continue entering our lives, either,
- 15:53Speaker 1: whether that's people, places, things, thoughts. You know, there's so
- 15:58Speaker 1: many ways we can set boundary, is what it's not
- 16:01Speaker 1: just setting a boundary with a person. You can set
- 16:03Speaker 1: financial boundaries, you can set environment boundaries, you know, And
- 16:08Speaker 1: I think like thinking in that aspect too, really helps
- 16:11Speaker 1: us give us, like some type of an outline or
- 16:14Speaker 1: a structure for what that five year plan looks like.
- 16:18Speaker 2: Right, And I love what you said earlier about the
- 16:21Speaker 2: idea that it's okay if the plan needs to shift.
- 16:26Speaker 2: I know from plans that I have set in motion
- 16:29Speaker 2: in the past that sometimes getting out of your own
- 16:32Speaker 2: way to allow for that shift can be truly, truly difficult.
- 16:37Speaker 2: What advice do you have to offer to someone who
- 16:40Speaker 2: may be hitting that hurdle, that roadblock right now?
- 16:44Speaker 1: Yeah, I think look at those hurdles and those roadblocks
- 16:48Speaker 1: as wins. You know, we oftentimes when we're faced with
- 16:52Speaker 1: an obstacle that is stressful, we view them as losses
- 16:58Speaker 1: or you know, obstacles that aren't getting us to the
- 17:02Speaker 1: point that we want to be. But if we reframe
- 17:05Speaker 1: the way we think about it as this is actually
- 17:07Speaker 1: something that's telling me and correcting the path that I'm on. Like,
- 17:12Speaker 1: if I'm hitting an obstacle in life because I don't
- 17:14Speaker 1: like I just you know, if I just wake up
- 17:17Speaker 1: today and say, oh, I decided I don't actually even
- 17:20Speaker 1: want to be a therapist tomorrow, that I really just
- 17:23Speaker 1: want to focus on doing the consulting that I do
- 17:26Speaker 1: in the mental health space, then to me, that also
- 17:30Speaker 1: is a win because it's giving me insight into what
- 17:33Speaker 1: it is I truly want. And so I think having
- 17:37Speaker 1: the reframe is so important because when we get caught
- 17:41Speaker 1: up in the stress around those obstacles, we can avoid, right,
- 17:46Speaker 1: that's where the anxiety comes from because we don't have
- 17:49Speaker 1: the clear answer, but it is kind of giving us
- 17:52Speaker 1: an answer, it just might not be the answer that
- 17:53Speaker 1: we had initially thought it was going to be. So
- 17:58Speaker 1: seeing it as like those opsles our answers, they're just
- 18:01Speaker 1: not what we foreshadowed when we originally made the plan,
- 18:05Speaker 1: and being flexible and adaptable in the process. If that
- 18:10Speaker 1: makes sense.
- 18:10Speaker 3: No, it totally makes sense.
- 18:11Speaker 2: And I think that the biggest obstacle or a hurdle
- 18:15Speaker 2: in these scenarios is often that overwhelming feeling that.
- 18:20Speaker 3: I'm back at square one.
- 18:22Speaker 2: And you know that's so applicable in a myriad of situations, right,
- 18:28Speaker 2: I mean, the first one that comes to mind is
- 18:30Speaker 2: getting out of perhaps like a long term relationship, and
- 18:33Speaker 2: it's like, oh, I invested three years into this thing,
- 18:36Speaker 2: and now I'm back where I started. But the reality
- 18:40Speaker 2: of that and what you're getting at here is truly
- 18:43Speaker 2: that you're not actually where you started it at all,
- 18:45Speaker 2: because you have three years of learnings under your belt
- 18:48Speaker 2: to equip you to the thing that's next for you,
- 18:51Speaker 2: the thing that will happen for you as you move forward.
- 18:55Speaker 2: But still that low feeling, that square one feeling, it's
- 18:59Speaker 2: understandable and it's undeniably something that we all experience.
- 19:02Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah, it's all about perspective and looking at it
- 19:07Speaker 1: as it's just fine tuning our skill set and our experiences.
- 19:11Speaker 1: And you know, we need to try things in order
- 19:15Speaker 1: to learn if we like them or not. We can't
- 19:17Speaker 1: sit on the sidelines and watch and decide, oh I
- 19:21Speaker 1: can do that or I can't do that. We need
- 19:22Speaker 1: to integrate ourselves into whatever it is. And that's truly
- 19:26Speaker 1: how we're going to learn if this is what's for
- 19:28Speaker 1: us or not. And that is a that is a
- 19:31Speaker 1: skill that is climbing up the ladder, getting a step
- 19:34Speaker 1: in the right direction, because without that then you wouldn't
- 19:38Speaker 1: even have that next decision to make right.
- 19:40Speaker 2: And this really does like go back to your how
- 19:44Speaker 2: we started. This kind of touches on your journey right
- 19:47Speaker 2: thinking that you wanted to be an orthodonist, but realizing
- 19:49Speaker 2: that organic chemistry was absolutely miserable for you. So you
- 19:52Speaker 2: were able to then take that feedback I'm sure at
- 19:56Speaker 2: the moment maybe it felt some kind of way and
- 19:58Speaker 2: then be like, but what act actually does serve me,
- 20:01Speaker 2: what actually feels right for me, and in turn get
- 20:05Speaker 2: into a career that does really feel fulfilling.
- 20:07Speaker 1: Yeah, absolutely, And knowing too that, like you don't have
- 20:11Speaker 1: to have the answer right away, like if you're hit
- 20:13Speaker 1: with an obstacle or you're faced with your reality that
- 20:16Speaker 1: you don't suddenly like the path that you're currently on,
- 20:19Speaker 1: like give yourself a little bit of time to figure
- 20:22Speaker 1: out where you want to pivot that path too, and
- 20:25Speaker 1: knowing that like sometimes just sitting with yourself, taking a break, resting,
- 20:30Speaker 1: channeling your inner child, if that means what you need
- 20:34Speaker 1: to do, whatever it is, that's okay, Like you don't
- 20:37Speaker 1: have to just suddenly know I'll have that a ha moment,
- 20:40Speaker 1: Like it will come, just might take some time.
- 20:42Speaker 2: Right, Experimentation is the way. So let's make this applicable.
- 20:48Speaker 2: Let's bring it into focus.
- 20:50Speaker 3: Here.
- 20:50Speaker 2: Someone is working on what they think is a purposeful
- 20:54Speaker 2: and great five year plan, and even though they can
- 20:56Speaker 2: feel very sure that it is bringing them up the
- 21:00Speaker 2: right tracks to the top of the roller coaster, they
- 21:03Speaker 2: are still.
- 21:03Speaker 3: Feeling like, Holy hell, what am I doing?
- 21:06Speaker 2: How can they make that experience feel a little bit
- 21:11Speaker 2: less overwhelming?
- 21:13Speaker 1: Yeah? I think one is to really have a strong
- 21:18Speaker 1: support system. And I think that support system needs to
- 21:23Speaker 1: Something I tell my clients a lot is to make
- 21:26Speaker 1: sure your support system is made up of people who
- 21:28Speaker 1: are in similar industries as you, as well as people
- 21:32Speaker 1: who are completely opposite industries as you. Like one of
- 21:35Speaker 1: my best friends is in like pharmaceutical advertising, and I
- 21:39Speaker 1: love it because it's such a different experience for her
- 21:43Speaker 1: that like, her viewpoints really matter to me because she's
- 21:46Speaker 1: looking at things from a completely different lens, and that
- 21:49Speaker 1: is that brings a lot of value to my life.
- 21:52Speaker 1: And I think when we surround ourselves with only a
- 21:54Speaker 1: support system that are either yes people or think very
- 21:58Speaker 1: similarly like, it's not being challenge. So I think having
- 22:01Speaker 1: a strong support system of people who will one validate
- 22:05Speaker 1: what your experience is because it really is overwhelming to
- 22:08Speaker 1: stick to a five year plan. And two also just
- 22:11Speaker 1: be able to help guide you in whatever way you
- 22:13Speaker 1: need guidance. But then also I think I'm a big
- 22:16Speaker 1: proponent of writing things down. Oftentimes when we're thinking of
- 22:21Speaker 1: our five year plan, it's all staying up inside of
- 22:24Speaker 1: our minds mentally, and brain dumping is such a powerful
- 22:29Speaker 1: powerful tool that like you really can just whether you
- 22:33Speaker 1: get a huge piece of paper and literally map out
- 22:36Speaker 1: your plan, or you journal about it, or you write
- 22:39Speaker 1: it down. What that's doing is it's taking all of
- 22:41Speaker 1: the anxious thoughts or all of the thoughts that we're
- 22:44Speaker 1: having from our minds and putting them out onto pen
- 22:47Speaker 1: and paper. Doesn't feel like we're holding onto them and
- 22:50Speaker 1: they're only staying inside. It gives its level of reality
- 22:54Speaker 1: to them. And what that does is it helps us reflect.
- 22:57Speaker 1: It helps us really look to see, like measure our progress.
- 23:01Speaker 1: How far are we, how far have we come, what
- 23:03Speaker 1: do we still have to do? How attainable is that?
- 23:06Speaker 1: How realistic is it? And what is the timeline for that.
- 23:09Speaker 1: If you think of smart goals, they're short, measurable, achievable,
- 23:13Speaker 1: realistic and timely and They're incredibly important when you have
- 23:16Speaker 1: a five year plan, breaking that down into increments and
- 23:20Speaker 1: making sure that you're celebrating those small victories along the way,
- 23:25Speaker 1: recognizing your trials, because five years is a really long
- 23:28Speaker 1: time and it's really easy to get to get caught
- 23:31Speaker 1: up into like, oh my god, I'm only one year in,
- 23:33Speaker 1: I have four more to go. Like, you know, if
- 23:36Speaker 1: you look at it through a broad lens like that,
- 23:39Speaker 1: it's going to be debilitating at times. It's going to
- 23:42Speaker 1: create a lot of anxiety. So trying to narrow your
- 23:45Speaker 1: lens down to maybe six months, you know, even though
- 23:50Speaker 1: that six months is a part of a bigger plan,
- 23:53Speaker 1: having your focus just be on a shorter period of
- 23:56Speaker 1: time can also be really helpful.
- 23:58Speaker 2: Right, So two things a double click on here. The
- 24:00Speaker 2: first thing being the power of brain dumping. I love
- 24:03Speaker 2: this term. I think it's great. So getting everything out
- 24:06Speaker 2: from inside your head, whether their anxious thoughts or not
- 24:09Speaker 2: having the opportunity to then see it in front of
- 24:12Speaker 2: you allows you to look at it in a different lens.
- 24:16Speaker 2: And then the second thing here is really the benefit
- 24:18Speaker 2: of creating smaller plans within your big plan, right, because
- 24:22Speaker 2: when you have smaller measurable plans. We love a smart
- 24:26Speaker 2: acronym here unhurdle that that allows you to celebrate the
- 24:30Speaker 2: wins as they come, because if you're only celebrating a
- 24:33Speaker 2: win every five years, no wonder, it's going to feel tiring.
- 24:37Speaker 2: On that note, when someone gets tired on their journey
- 24:44Speaker 2: when it comes to making their five year plan, do
- 24:47Speaker 2: you have any advice to offer them? Because it's not
- 24:50Speaker 2: necessarily I would say that this person is unsure that
- 24:55Speaker 2: this is something that they still want, but it's more
- 24:57Speaker 2: so that, like again, we just get worn down.
- 25:00Speaker 3: Burnout is more prevalent than ever. You don't need me
- 25:02Speaker 3: to tell you that. So what's a person to do?
- 25:05Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean my first instinct is to tell them
- 25:08Speaker 1: to listen to their body, because if your body is
- 25:12Speaker 1: feeling tired and you're having either physical or mental symptoms
- 25:16Speaker 1: of burnout, then that's a good indicator that you need
- 25:18Speaker 1: to rest and you need to recharge, and you need
- 25:21Speaker 1: to maybe just take a break and step away from
- 25:24Speaker 1: that plan or building that plan to really just cater
- 25:28Speaker 1: to what your needs are in that moment. And that's
- 25:31Speaker 1: totally fine to do. Resting is productive, and resting and
- 25:34Speaker 1: recharging is something that will help us continue on that
- 25:39Speaker 1: journey of the five year plan, and I think it's
- 25:41Speaker 1: a really crucial piece of a five year plan is
- 25:43Speaker 1: to also allow time for self care, recharging, resting vacations.
- 25:49Speaker 1: And if that's all you can think about, then you're
- 25:53Speaker 1: not really going to feel motivated, You're going to potentially
- 25:57Speaker 1: lose confidence, You're going to maybe deal with some impot syndrome.
- 26:00Speaker 1: There's a lot of negative mental health components that can
- 26:03Speaker 1: come from pushing yourself too hard when you're burnt out,
- 26:06Speaker 1: and you know, research shows that if you try to
- 26:09Speaker 1: just push through or have that push through mentality, that
- 26:12Speaker 1: it actually takes you back quite a few steps, because
- 26:17Speaker 1: not only are you physically tired, you're mentally tired, and
- 26:20Speaker 1: then you just become checked out and disinterested in what
- 26:23Speaker 1: you are trying to achieve. So my advice on that
- 26:28Speaker 1: would just be to find something that you just genuinely love.
- 26:31Speaker 1: If you want to binge watch all of Sex in
- 26:33Speaker 1: the City again, then do it. You know, whatever it
- 26:36Speaker 1: is to just let yourself chill for a second.
- 26:39Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean, I definitely binge watched Sex and the
- 26:42Speaker 2: City the OC and like trying to think about everything else.
- 26:44Speaker 2: I watched during the pandemic when I was like, what
- 26:47Speaker 2: am I doing? What am I doing?
- 26:50Speaker 3: And also you know what I can like in this too.
- 26:52Speaker 2: It's like the same dichotomy to taking rest days, even
- 26:57Speaker 2: though sometimes they feel counterintuitive right from your traditional workout plan,
- 27:01Speaker 2: It's like the rest day. The day off enables you
- 27:05Speaker 2: to go after your big goals, regardless of what they
- 27:08Speaker 2: might be, because it allows your body the time to
- 27:10Speaker 2: repair itself so that you can show up once again.
- 27:13Speaker 2: So the same thing goes for your mental health. And
- 27:16Speaker 2: to combat this idea that rest can be seen as
- 27:20Speaker 2: lazy or taking time off means that you don't actually
- 27:24Speaker 2: want the thing that you say that you want.
- 27:26Speaker 1: That's bs rest is an investment, a healthy investment into
- 27:31Speaker 1: that plan.
- 27:32Speaker 3: It's crucial, crucial.
- 27:35Speaker 2: Is there anything we have in cover when it comes
- 27:37Speaker 2: to smart strategies for setting yourself up for a five
- 27:39Speaker 2: year plan? Is there anything else that we can be
- 27:41Speaker 2: doing to take care of ourselves during this process so
- 27:44Speaker 2: that we can actually get the thing that we're after.
- 27:47Speaker 1: One thing I actually was just talking to a client
- 27:49Speaker 1: about recently was staying open minded in the process, trying
- 27:54Speaker 1: to find that balance between like staying on track to
- 27:57Speaker 1: what your goal is, but also not turning down opportunities
- 28:00Speaker 1: that might not align with that five year plan, because
- 28:04Speaker 1: you know those opportunities might be just what you need
- 28:07Speaker 1: to reevaluate that plan or to have an epiphany experience
- 28:13Speaker 1: where you're just kind of like, actually, I really want
- 28:15Speaker 1: to go in this direction. And sometimes we get too
- 28:19Speaker 1: hyper focused on our five year plans and they become
- 28:23Speaker 1: too rigid. And my biggest thing is finding the balance
- 28:29Speaker 1: between being open staying on track because you never know
- 28:34Speaker 1: what's going to come your way, and if you're staying
- 28:37Speaker 1: too rigid and you turn something down, you might miss
- 28:39Speaker 1: out on something that can change that trajectory for the better.
- 28:43Speaker 2: Be open to the universe. I love it, Liz. This
- 28:47Speaker 2: was really helpful. I think that there are a lot
- 28:49Speaker 2: of motivated people that are listening to this episode right now,
- 28:52Speaker 2: and I'm sure they'd love to follow along with you
- 28:55Speaker 2: for more motivation going forward.
- 28:57Speaker 3: So how do the hurdlers keep up with you? How
- 28:59Speaker 3: do they follow along with you?
- 29:00Speaker 1: What?
- 29:00Speaker 3: Give us your details?
- 29:02Speaker 1: Absolutely so, I have two Instagram accounts that I am on.
- 29:06Speaker 1: My private practice is mental SESSH M E N T
- 29:10Speaker 1: L DOT s E s H and that's where you'll
- 29:13Speaker 1: find all of the mental health content I put out
- 29:15Speaker 1: into the world. And then my personal Instagram is literally
- 29:19Speaker 1: just me as a human being. You don't see too
- 29:21Speaker 1: much mental health content on there because, aside from being
- 29:24Speaker 1: a therapist, I love fashion, I love sports, and that's
- 29:27Speaker 1: what you're gonna get on that account. So that's Liz
- 29:30Speaker 1: l a Z The Letter B and then Croft.
- 29:32Speaker 2: C R O F T Beautiful, I'm over at Emilia
- 29:35Speaker 2: Body and at Hurdle Podcast Another Hurdle Conquered.
- 29:39Speaker 3: Catch you guys next time.