Latest / Just Us Sisters / Episode 36: Things That Scare Us After 50
Transcript
- speaker-0: Welcome to the Just Us Sisters Podcast. Life doesn't come with a manual, so we made a podcast. speaker-1: Welcome to Just Us Sisters. Susan, speaker-0: Minds. speaker-1: I'm the host for today. We are Scare Us After Fift, Episode 36. I want to introduce sisters speaker-0: My speaker-1: to you, Cheryl, Shelly, and Stacy. Thank you for joining us with Holly where speaker-0: All in birth order. Joining us Halloween right around the corner speaker-1: we decided to talk about those. speaker-0: things that scare us. And I was podcast speaker-1: Researching for today's speaker-0: and a twenty twenty-five speaker-1: A ARP study. speaker-0: of adults fifty and older found that roughly one in four family speaker-1: People are extremely speaker-0: or very worried about financial insecurity caused decline. and poor physical health. Around one in five worried speaker-1: Five years speaker-0: about losing independence or becoming a burden on family. So we're gonna look at them in order right now. And I speaker-1: As I do. speaker-0: I want my sisters to, you know, kind of let me know if that's something that they are concerned about. Because I know that on speaker-1: Obviously. speaker-0: one in four people in this survey, that's a pretty high percentage percent. speaker-1: Twenty five have these fears. So let's look at the speaker-0: Ten common fears among adults over fifty. Number one on a twenty twenty center survey. They're abilities, illness, speaker-1: 25 Pew Research Losing Health or Physical Abilities, Fear of Chronic Illinois. speaker-0: pain, mobility limitations the things they enjoy. Can y'all speaker-1: Relate to that fear. Yeah, yeah. speaker-2: I think that's the one thing that I'm the biggest fearful of Probably the mobility part, I think. because I've seen it happen and that that's a little scary. speaker-0: Mm-hmm. No longer being able to do the things that you once enjoyed. Yeah. You have found speaker-1: Yeah. speaker-0: to be a a concern. Number two, running out of money in retirement. Worrying about inflation, medical expenses, bills, speaker-1: Inflation Social Security speaker-0: or outliving retirement savings. So that tends to be a concern as people approach retirement. speaker-1: And I know Stacy you mentioned. speaker-2: Because I'm just now looking at what it would take to retire. I mean, I've been putting in and my husband has retirement from being a teacher. so when he retires he'll have a pension. But it is scary. It's scary to think about can I live the same lifestyle that I live today and be retired? Or should I expect that even? Yeah. So yeah, that's a concern for me. speaker-0: Well, number three was losing independence, having to depend on children or others for transportation, care, finances, sort of speaker-1: Daily care or basic decision. speaker-0: getting older, but it's losing control over our own minds. And I can see how that would be a fear. And we'll live speaker-1: Get the speaker-0: in more specifics with in just a little bit. Number four. Loneliness and losing loved ones, losing a spouse or siblings, friends, or family members, and wondering who's still will be there later on in life. Or having that feeling of being disconnected later on in life from those friends, family, siblings. So loneliness and losing loved ones. That was number four. Number five was one that is becoming a burden to our family. And we're the Our adult children may have to provide care or take on financialities speaker-1: financial responsibility. speaker-0: or sacrifice their own lives because of their parents' needs. speaker-1: I wanna take this time to encourage you to hit that subscribe subscribe. speaker-0: and subscribe button when you subscribe you will get notified of all the podcasts that will come out now hit it subscri speaker-1: out each week. So do it click it, subscribe. speaker-3: Subscribe. speaker-2: Subscribe. speaker-0: Number six was memory loss of speaker-1: X loss or cognitive speaker-0: decline, fear of Alzheimer's, dementia, losing memories or no longer recognizing the people they love. And this can also involve losing one's own identity and ability to make decisions. Number speaker-1: Number seven was losing business. speaker-0: purpose or feeling irr irrelevant. And I'm wondering what offer now. Number speaker-1: So I have to retirement speaker-0: eight, family changing or becoming strained. And we see this a lot lately is, you know, adult children becoming estranged speaker-1: Distribution. speaker-0: from their speaker-1: So losing purpose. Eight relationships speaker-0: Parents or family and that speaker-1: What is a concern? speaker-0: is number eight in the top ten concerns. Worrying about adult children, grandchildren, family conflict, connected speaker-1: Marriage or becoming disconnected. speaker-0: from the people who matter most. Number nine, having to leave speaker-1: Nine. speaker-0: their home or familiar surroundings. That's another thing that is concerning and scary to people. And the last one, number ten, regret, missed. speaker-1: Stop or two. speaker-0: Opportunities and some fear of death, you know, looking back and wondering whether they spent enough time with loved ones, pursuing. speaker-1: pursued their dreams, repaired relationships. speaker-0: Or lived according to their values. Some speaker-1: Also speaker-0: begin to directly think more about death and what they will leave behind and what they're going to. And for some death speaker-1: is very scary. So with all that being heavy thing to be afraid of. But speaker-0: said, I know that those are some things to be there are viable things that people are concerned about. Let's start on the lighter side. speaker-1: We're gonna talk about our physical tech stuff, just some things that we have realized as we see things start to happen. So when did you that your speaker-0: that can get a little bit scary and realize your body was no longer following your instructions. speaker-1: What led you to believe that? speaker-3: 60. When I hit 60, it doesn't matter. I I had a hip replaced in my fifties and I had a surgery on my neck in my fifties. But when I hit sixty, when I get injured, I'm not bouncing back like I used to. And it is really hard to swallow because we're all so active. And when we can't get out and play with the grandkids, no matter what it is, because I mean I'd jump out there and play. horse or two on two, pickleball, whatever. And man, now I'm not able to do that right now and it's very frustrating. speaker-2: Yeah. Mine is probably about fifty five, the ability to get back to it. So if you have to take a break because of something that's going on, it is almost impossible to get back into it and to grow your muscles back without just being so sore or having the energy to do it. It's the I'm so tired I can't work out, but I'm not working out because I'm so tired. It's Yeah, that's psych and how do you get out of that to change it, you know, once you have don't ever stop working out. Always do something because I'm trying to get back into it and I'm sore and I'm tired and it's tough and my body's not responding like I'd like it to. speaker-4: Is a motivation for me continuing to work out because I know what it's like to have to start again. And as difficult as it can be to get up in the morning and get that workout in, I think this is so much better than stopping and having to restart, especially at this age. But I remember Gosh, it may have even been late forties. I went to the chiropractor 'cause I threw my back out. And he said, What did you do? And I said, I bent down to pick up a towel. And that's when I realized my body is has a brain of its own. speaker-3: yeah. speaker-1: Shelly and We always kid that the biggest part of the workout speaker-0: is going from the floor workout to standing up. And I think that's when I realized my body was no longer following instructions. When it was more difficult and and it became more difficult the speaker-1: It was I used to just pop right up difficult to get up off speaker-0: floor. And I mean it's bad when that is your butt has been a big part of the workout for me. speaker-2: And I think I've read something where that also shows like your physical age, your ability to get up off of the floor. If it's from in sitting Indian style or, you know, laying flat doing ab work or whatever. That speaker-1: Well if you would see me, Stacy you wouldn't. speaker-0: Think I was a hundred. speaker-2: I think we all have that feeling every once in a while for sure. speaker-4: You've seen those videos of little toddlers mimicking their grandparents and how they walk and everything. Every time I get up off the floor, I I just picture my future grandchildren mimicking me. And I'm I'm just glad that I'm FaceTiming Susan and sometimes Tom and not being recorded because I just know someone would turn it in and just I would become a meme, is what I would become. speaker-2: Think we all have that ability to become a mean. speaker-1: Yes, we do. So what scares you gu girls in someone's name for why you walked into a room? speaker-0: most for getting name, for getting into a room, or accidentally sending a text to the wrong person. speaker-2: forget people's names often. It's not that I forget I have a name of what their name should be in my head. And so that doesn't scare me 'cause I've had to overcome that my whole life. The forgetting why I walked into a room again, I when you have ADHD, you walk into a room for one thing and the shiny object that catches your eye. So it that's not a concern. But what was the other one? speaker-0: Sending the wrong person. speaker-3: That's mine. Because in in the field I'm in, I can't be sending text that I would be sending to my friends or my kids because it's completely opposite of what you know, we're probably talking about. It's not anything ugly, but it's probably something silly. So that is a I've done it. I mean it's not I don't speaker-0: Forgetting someone's name. When I see someone that and then it's speaker-1: Because I see that is just accelerated. speaker-0: everything. Then I really can't think of it. Yeah. It's like I get a brain reach. speaker-1: Shelly, what's yours? speaker-4: Shortly after graduating from high school, I came across a friend that I knew quite well and I went to introduce her. And I mean, there was nothing. I froze. And that I mean, obviously forty years later, that memory sticks with me and I don't wanna be in that situation. So if Andy's with me, we have a system that if he doesn't know someone and I don't introduce them right when we approach he is to introduce himself because his signal that I can't I speaker-3: That's a good. speaker-4: can't remember the name. speaker-1: So what technology speaker-0: No. speaker-1: related situation makes you break? speaker-0: out in all of them make it make me break out in a cold sweat. But and you may have another one but like a new phone or a software update barcode menu or what speaker-1: A QR when someone says just click the link below, which one of those? speaker-0: For me it's new anything. New phone. I got a new laptop. speaker-1: I lost a bunch of stuff. It was speaker-0: Awful. I end up having to call Guy and help walk me through it. So speaker-2: Is that age though? I don't know if that's age because we rely so much on technology today that anything new is scary, that you're gonna lose something or or having to learn how to use it. That's what I think. speaker-1: Probably do one. speaker-0: Of what I can do on this laptop. speaker-4: Mine with all the scams going around, I am hesitant to click on anything. And so that would be one of the big things, not because of technology, but just because of all the fraud and everything. But this week I did get a new phone and everything transferred over except my passwords. And it doesn't remember and I don't either. So going through and having to reestablish all these passwords, I'm like, that's why I have you. Yeah. speaker-3: Tide all down and put in a safe place. No speaker-4: It's all about forgot forgot password. Forgot password this whole week. speaker-2: Just use that as your password. I forgot my password. One one. speaker-0: So speaker-3: Yes. speaker-1: What's something you used to do without a second thought requires speaker-0: And now kinda requires speaker-1: a full risk assessment. You have to really speaker-0: think about, okay, you know, what what do I do here? Like getting up on a ladder, walking down what steps, staying up past ten? speaker-1: Trying a new exercise class. speaker-0: Any of those ring a bell? I I I need to think speaker-3: I'm always watching to see where we have to go in a building in like a church. It's it's fine going up. It's coming down. So we have a elevator, so I try to go up the stairs and down the elevator. Wet steps, I mean that's almost out because you I mean if you lose your footing, yeah, it's not gonna be a good situation. speaker-2: Yeah, that's a good point, Cheryl. speaker-4: Well, having been a caretaker for so long of the elderly, I'm always looking for something that they can trip on or stumble. so that's just innate for me. But I have gotten to where I really avoid ladders. Yeah. If I if I if I can. Yeah, I don't know if it's a equilibrium thing or what, but I try to avoid ladders. speaker-1: It just takes me speaker-0: Me a while to go up and down them. I I just went up one yesterday, the ladder going up into her attic. speaker-1: But I just take it slower, just about each room my foot. speaker-0: think about wrong and what's on their right 'cause I definitely don't want to come down or miss one. So okay. speaker-1: Let's talk about the biggest beauty or ages that we have. Have those? speaker-2: Yeah, I do. I sit on Zoom all day. Zoom or Teams calls. So I see every wrinkle, every neckline, you know, every misplaced eyebrow hair. It's a little scary, but it is what it is, you know. Luckily when we look at our parents and our and our aunts and uncles, they all aged pretty well, you know? And so I think we have good genes. Now I have not been good to my body nor my face. I haven't been the caretaker of my face that I should have been. And so I think that that will come back to bite me someday. speaker-3: I didn't put hands on like grand, was it Pong? speaker-2: Ponds always she always used pawns. speaker-0: It works. speaker-1: It did. Yeah. Cheryl, do you have any aging or beauty fears? speaker-3: I don't like my that turkey neck thing. Johnny and I were talking about getting this mold removed today 'cause hair grows out of it all the time. speaker-1: So that would not that would not be the only reason to get it. But that would be, I guess, why speaker-3: Well, I mean, you don't mess with if they're not cancers, I don't think. It always has a couple of speaker-2: Unless they have hair hanging out of them. speaker-1: I think for me, obviously gray hair doesn't mean wrinkles. speaker-0: Doesn't bother me don't bother me. speaker-1: I think for me it would be teeth. You know teeth would be a b speaker-0: Biggie for me. speaker-1: I try to use whitener strips just because glowing teeth ages peeping speaker-0: yelling people and you know, losing speaker-1: teeth. speaker-0: that's a concern of mine. I had a moved speaker-1: Tooth removed. speaker-0: right here in the middle and it threw everything off in my mouth. But something that I would some speaker-1: Really through everything. That would be teeth would be have to probably get fake teeth. speaker-0: I don't know that I could go without teeth. So if they fell without speaker-1: Well Shelly, what about you? speaker-0: any speaker-4: Well, with weight loss comes wrinkles. I told Andy you can have fat and younger looking Shelly or you can have getting healthier but wrinkled Shelly. He chose wrinkled Shelly, obviously. But I've just come to realize I notice it a lot more now. And I haven't found the fountain of youth yet. speaker-2: You have beautiful skin, Shelley. You speaker-1: Yeah, yeah. speaker-2: have beautiful skin. You know what scares me more than any of that? This. speaker-0: Grand speaker-1: Yeah. Remember the kid we used to do speaker-3: Yeah. speaker-2: But my grandkids do it to me. speaker-0: Give them an opportunity to do that. speaker-2: yeah, I'm I'm gonna walk around like this from now on. speaker-1: So has anything this speaker-0: In cat in these categories become scarier. speaker-1: with age. The grocery bill, the gas pump of having speaker-0: the thought of having to work another twenty years those things are they becoming scarier? speaker-3: That gas pump right now is unbelievable. speaker-1: For me it's groceries. Yeah, groceries. speaker-3: But the gas, I mean, 'cause we're on the road all the time. It's yeah, it's a killer. Yeah. We yeah. speaker-4: I used to never pay attention to grocery cost. I order online. I I I just didn't. But here lately I really pause and think, do we really need this? That's speaker-0: Yeah. speaker-4: that's a first for me. speaker-1: Well we went this week. speaker-0: We had some company come in for, you know, for breakfast and for dinner and I two hundred at B Tom spent four hundred at Costco. speaker-1: H. E. speaker-0: Six hundred dollars. I mean, that's not gonna last us a month. I'm awful. speaker-1: But I I was just was like, Goodness, that's awful. So is there anything that y'all refuse to pay full price for? speaker-4: Mine's clothes. I wait for sales if I can. If there's a special event or something comes up, but I really look for sales and just I don't like spending full price on clothes if I can avoid it. speaker-0: Mine would be cosmetic and face cleaning stuff. I I don't like paying full price. Already expensive, so I'm gonna wait for it to go on sale and then buy a bunch. So what speaker-1: Scares you most about being the older gen speaker-0: At family gatherings. speaker-2: Does it only have to be at family gatherings though? speaker-1: Well no, but any social speaker-0: Yeah. speaker-2: Yeah. So at work I'm the older generation now. Like a lot of the people that I work with could be my kids. That is a sobering thought, you know, that the people all around you are your kids' age. And I don't know, that's odd. At family gatherings, I like it 'cause you get to get up in the line for the food faster. speaker-3: Only in our family guess. Only in our family. speaker-2: Well okay. speaker-1: Well, you know, Stacy speaker-0: What I don't like is not having an idea what speaker-1: Yeah, what? speaker-0: the grandkids are talking about sometimes. It works the speaker-1: Yeah. speaker-0: things that they think are funny or whatever. speaker-1: Yeah. speaker-3: Six seven speaker-2: I never understood that or sus. That's sus. What is sus? What what does that mean? speaker-3: Yeah, I think that the slang and when I was teaching I it didn't matter how old I got, I stayed up with that slang music speaker-0: Yeah. speaker-1: Bet you did. speaker-3: and all the new well, their new fashion, not my new fashion, but now I'm like in the dark. speaker-1: Yeah. speaker-2: The slang that we used to use that's no longer politically correct. Yeah. You know, that's a fear that you might say something like a game that we used to play or something. yeah. I don't know. I remember that's probably more fearful to me than other areas. speaker-1: Which sister do you think is the most affected speaker-0: Afraid of aging. And do you have any evidence that speaker-1: Why why speaker-2: Me I was just about to say I don't think any of us are that fearful of aging. Because we've had fearful of it. speaker-0: I don't think you're fine. speaker-1: You don't know that you're embracing it yet like we have. speaker-3: Well she's young too. speaker-1: You you're right. You're the baby. speaker-2: got I got a couple more years to go. I am excited about retiring when I can. I'm looking forward to that. I am I love being a grandma to almost sixteen people kids. Wow. There are parts that I embrace. The parts that I don't are this stuff and, you know, this. speaker-1: So so the physical part. speaker-2: Yeah, the physical part. Yeah. Nobody nobody can prepare you for that. speaker-4: money then I want to admit trying to find something, you know, that helps mitigate the aging and especially visually, if someone's gatekeeping that out there, y'all need to let us know because speaker-1: Yeah. speaker-2: I think it's the Koreans. speaker-4: No, it's not the Korean. I've got a drawer full of it. speaker-2: I was fixing to order some. I spent more speaker-3: Do speaker-4: Anything, call me. I can give you some to try. It did not work for me. speaker-3: Lilicky or something like that. The what? Lilic L I Q E. speaker-0: That doesn't sound like cosmetics. That sounds like something else. speaker-2: That goes with your bodily. speaker-4: John I don't know anything about Lilith. speaker-1: Fluid. Okay. Let's move on to speaker-3: for your turkey neck. speaker-1: let's move on to more serious questions. Out of those ten speaker-0: Or it may be something else that I didn't mention in the top ten, because I'm sure there are many, many more. So about getting older that you never really thought speaker-1: What scares you most you really think? speaker-0: when you were thought about when you were younger. speaker-4: never thought about loss of mobility. And I mean, for 30 years I've had limited mobility because of a severe ankle break. But when you know, that can definitely limit you and what you're able to do if you can't get around. And Andy and I still have a lot of stuff we want to do. So for me that I didn't think about when I was young, probably would have taken better care of my knees is loss of mobility. speaker-0: Mm-hmm. Anyone else have something different? speaker-2: Yeah. Mine is the fear of living life after a spouse died. You know, like I I just think that that would be extremely lonely. I love spending time with Casey. Love it. And if something were to happen, I think that that would that that's a huge fear. Even though I know, you know, that it was a plan, I would be lonely and speaker-1: So stay see how do you process that? Does it change how you speaker-0: fear and how to change love or spend time with Casey. speaker-2: That's great question. I just try to make the best out of every moment that we can. And and for him to always know how much I do love him. So if something ever happened to me first, he wouldn't be wondering, you know, did she love me or not? You know, he knows I I do, you know. So and I think he does the same. But process it, I don't think it's something that you can process, but you can't focus on it either. Because nope, the anxiety would eat you up about it. So it's just one of those things that when when it happens to a friend, you know, and then you start going, How do how are they doing? How are they getting through that? So speaker-1: Sh so Shelly that speaker-0: You mentioned that. speaker-1: it would be for you speaker-0: loss of mobility and y I know that you've been working at making that, you know, becoming stronger and not allowing that to limit you. I know that the ability do love to do it affect the way you live today besides speaker-1: But you said that losing to do life the way you it. So how does that theorem the way you but speaker-0: making you, you know, work out and speaker-1: Is there anything in particular that you do that speaker-0: In your workouts to make sure that speaker-1: doesn't happen? Well speaker-4: A lot a lot of our workouts are strength training for that exact purpose. There's nothing the doctors can do for my ankle and that's kind of disappointing. But you know, with weight loss and not as much weight on the joint, I know that will help and obviously I'm working toward that. You know, I it's just always on my mind that you know, things were to get worse mobility wise, our lifestyles would have to change and that's just exactly what I'm trying to avoid. speaker-0: Mm-hmm. That's speaker-1: Sure, what about you? speaker-0: your number one speaker-1: Yeah. speaker-0: concern? speaker-3: is yeah, the mobility. I mean I I can still walk and I need to be grateful because there's a lot of people I know that have to use a cane or a walker. But yeah, it's mobility. speaker-0: Well, I think for me it losing my memory. Well, that's a part of losing your health is losing speaker-3: That's mine too, more than anything 'cause I've been seeing speaker-2: So scary. speaker-1: It is. It's very scary. speaker-0: I've seen And I've watched their families, you know, them not know their families, not knowing their names. And that's just scary to me. And you know, it's kinda hard. It's prevent it's speaker-1: Really kinda hard to pick 'cause sometimes it's speaker-0: it's a a family thing, you know, it's in the family. But I know there are you know certain things may add to that. Trying speaker-1: That there are studies that show speaker-0: to prevent as much as possible that from happening. What's a fear speaker-1: Yeah. speaker-0: Of aging that you don't often talk about, like even with the people closest to you. And why do you think it's hard to say it out loud? Is there anything that you have a hard time talking about with other people that's scary? speaker-2: One thing that Betty went through was and and this goes on the financial side, I think, is when it was time for her to go to assisted living, she never had to go outside of assisted living, but there were things that she was going through that we could not help her with. And also when we were at work, she was lonely. But the amount that it cost to live in assisted living place. Mm-hmm. We had to pitch in there and I don't want my kids to have to do that. You know, I think that's scary because we lived through it. It was the best thing we ever did for her, ever. She loved that place. She ran that place. She was the mayor of Brookhaven. And so we never regretted it. But it makes you step back and say, what do I have in place so I'm not worried about that? speaker-3: Yeah. I think you nailed it being dying or being a burden on your kids. And we have talked about it. Two of my three kids have already assured us that we do not have to worry. I mean, obviously if if you've lost your mind or your memory, they can't keep you at the house. But up until that point, I think that they would be good, me and Johnny. I think speaker-0: It's so important. speaker-4: as as a parent of one child, staying relevant to Cherokee is definitely a concern. speaker-3: Yeah, but when she was on here, she let you know that she would take care of you and Andy if anything ever needed to be taken care of. speaker-0: And we'd want speaker-2: Right. Yeah. speaker-3: a matter of fact, yeah, that was gonna be a deal breaker if her husband wouldn't. speaker-0: So you know, I it's so important speaker-1: Think so I'm speaker-0: though that all of us and even our listeners about that with kids and with our husbands, Tom friends in the last well more than several in the last three or four years and it makes hard conversations with one another, you know, like, you know, what you do in this situation. speaker-1: What would you speaker-0: And there are things that I would do differently than what he would do. And we're both with that. And we've given each other permission to things. speaker-1: To do those because we want each other to be happy. speaker-0: happy and find joy in life. And one of those things that Tom told me, he said, I grieving. I would not want to grieve speaker-1: Don't want to see you gr to see you greed. speaker-0: hard and long. He said, you know, I speaker-1: I hope you do shed a tear, but which I will. But he said, I don't want you speaker-0: don't grieving and and life changing dramatically because I'm not here. And you know, I thought about that a greater testimony to our speaker-1: Our relationship. speaker-0: and to our God that you move on and not dwell in the past. And I thought, thank I mean, that gave me permission to do that, you know, because I feel like sometimes w you know, women when their husbands grieve and I differently in all situations, but I really feel like we haven't been given permission to move on to go go speaker-1: Forward. We stay stuck. speaker-0: and he doesn't want me to stay stuck and nor do I him. But I'm glad that speaker-2: You know, who would carry my purse and drive everywhere and it would be a whole lifestyle change of I am speaker-1: You're spoiled. speaker-2: spoiled. I would never be able to drink coffee again. I mean speaker-3: You wouldn't know how to make it. speaker-2: I don't know how so speaker-0: Well let me ask women of faith speaker-1: How do we reconcile trust in these different situations? speaker-0: God in situations that are scary and especially you know being afraid of what the future may hold for us reconcile that. speaker-1: How do y'all? speaker-2: Like I said before, how do you deal with that? You you trust. You trust in the Lord's plan. And that doesn't always come easy. But number one, in order to do that, for me, I have to be thankful every day for the life that I have and what I have been blessed with. I have a beautiful life. So look at that and just trust in the Lord's plan of what he has prepared and planned. And I can almost assure you there are gonna be times it's not what I have planned. But that doesn't mean that it's not gonna be beautiful and and perfect for me. Now, if I see that all the time, I don't know. But it is what you have to continue to think about, in my opinion. I I feel like that's what gets me into speaker-4: church we sing a song, part of the song is If I'm not dead, God's not done and I think a lot of people in their sixties and beyond need to remember that for purpose. And speaker-1: Yeah. speaker-4: I stand on the scripture, so do not fear for I am with you. Do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. Isaiah forty one ten. And I just take a lot of solace in that verse, just knowing there's times that my plans and God plans don't always align, but I do know that his are always better. speaker-0: Yes. speaker-1: Yeah. speaker-0: Absolutely. Absolutely. speaker-3: Knowing that God is in control. I really strive to live each day to the fullest and for him, but you know, also for my family and my friends. And I also try not to forget to say I love you too, you know, the ones that I actually do. speaker-0: Yeah. Intentional love. And saying don't put off Tomorrow what you need to do today, making things right, giving, speaker-1: Right in relationships, forget speaker-0: saying I love you. Those are all very, very important things. Have one closing question. One thing speaker-1: To share. Let's just speaker-0: about getting older that scare speaker-1: It doesn't scare me. speaker-0: me anymore. Maybe when you were younger it did, but it doesn't scare you anymore. speaker-4: Mine's the number of candles on my birthday cake because you and Cheryl have shown me that it is just a number and just to do everything I can to stay healthy. speaker-2: Shelly, I I'm right there with you. I love where you put that. The examples that we have from our own grandparents to our own parents and then our siblings, our si our beautiful sisters. So look at the three examples that I have from two years older to ten years. I I have nothing to fear there. speaker-3: I used to fear death so much and then I was like, it's just been in the last few years where I I'm not afraid to die. I mean sometimes when I'm thinking there's something majorly wrong, I just shut my eyes and pray and said if this is it, I'm ready. Now I don't like losing other people though. I still haven't gotten over that. But I'm getting speaker-0: Better. You know, we Stacey mentioned that we have speaker-1: We had we have speaker-0: had some beautiful examples of how to live through fears. And I think of Gran. Gran lived through a bunch of that she had. You know, she lived out on a ranch from speaker-1: Through the fears that she had been speaker-0: her family, away from everyone. And then she moved to n a brand new place. And then Pop died. And then, you know, she and then she speaker-1: She had dementia. She had cancer. I mean she just she went through so speaker-0: So many things, cancer and death and moving and new people and new church and w what a beautiful legacy of someone who just continued to trust God step of the way. Do speaker-1: Because every speaker-0: not be afraid, do not be terrified, do not be anxious. So many do not be afraid in scripture that speaker-1: It would it would really be hard to to feel speaker-0: Here in light of so much given to us in the Bible about resting in the peace of God that he speaker-1: Will rule the peace of God will rule in our hearts. So I I have enjoyed sharing this time with our listeners as we've talked about that scare us and we want to hear what they are afraid of. What are you afraid of? The things that we've mentioned and touch they speaker-0: Is it some of the maybe we haven't even touched on some of the fears that you may speaker-1: have. Share with us those fears that you have. Next week we are going to have episode thirty-seven. As a follow-up to this week's topic, a special guest science speaker-0: will be bringing a to his amenopause and neuroscience. speaker-1: coach to discuss the steps that we can be taking effects of A. speaker-0: to minimize the effect of aging because that was the majority of our discussion today. Join speaker-1: So I hope you will speaker-0: us next week. But until then, life is messy, meaningful, and better when shared. Thanks for speaker-1: For listening and don't forget to like us. speaker-3: Share us. speaker-2: And subscribe. It's free. Bye. speaker-1: Bye. speaker-0: Yeah.