Latest / Destination Unlimited with Victor Fuhrman / Christy Whitman – The Desire Factor

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Christy Whitman – The Desire Factor · Destination Unlimited with Victor Fuhrman

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My name is Victor Furman. Some call me the Voice. I've always been
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fascinated with human nature, spirituality, science and the crossroads at which they meet.
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Join me now and we will explore these topics and so much more with
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fascinating guests, authors and experts who will guide us to Destination Unlimited. Are
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you ready to unlock the power within you to manifest your deepest desires? Forget
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everything you thought you knew about desire. My guest this week on Destination Unlimited,
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Christy Whitman, reveals that desire is not only natural, but essential to
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the manifestation process. Christy Whitman is a New York Times bestselling author and transformational
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leader. She has appeared on The Today Show and The Morning Show, and
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her work has been featured in People Magazine, Seventeen, Woman's Day, Hollywood
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Life, and teen Vogue, among others. As the CEO and founder of
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the Quantum Success Coaching Academy, a twelvemonth Law of Attraction coaching certification program,
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Christy has helped thousands of people worldwide to achieve their goals through her empowerment seminars,
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speeches, and coaching sessions and products. Her website is Christy Whitman dot
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com, and she joins me this week to share her wisdom and latest book,
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The Desire Factor, How to embrace your materialistic nature to reclaim your full
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spiritual power. Please join me in welcoming to Destination Unlimited, Christy Whitman.
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Good evening, Christy, Hi Victor, I'm so happy to be with you.
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Hi everybody, Hi, and thank you so much for joining us.
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Christy. Please share with the us our listeners your early path and how it
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led to the wisdom and work that you share with our world. Well,
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my early path was I was raised Catholic. I was in a family that
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was American Italian American middle class, and really believed, like a lot of
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people believe and grow up that if you, you know, get the diploma,
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if you get married, if you have the kids, then you'll finally
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be happy. If you have this level of success or accomplishment, when you
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check off all the boxes, then you'll find that success and fulfillment. And
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I did. I checked the boxes pretty quickly in my early twenties and found
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that getting a degree and getting engaged and all those things none of that fulfilled
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me as I thought they were supposed to. And that led me really searching
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for what is this about? You know, is this all there is?
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And with that, I was you know, if you ever felt that hunger,
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that thirst for some thing, more knowledge, more awareness of what my
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current reality was like, the circumstances, and what I was guided to do.
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Met a new guy lived in California. Transferred companies from Chicago to California
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to be with this guy, ended up breaking up with him within a month.
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So here I am in a new city. You know, I don't
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know anybody, even in a new state, Northern California. And one person
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I met was a hairdresser who I need to get my hair cut. And
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as I was talking to her, there was something so different about her.
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It was like she had what I wanted. I'm always reminded by the when
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Harry met Sally when they're in the diner and the woman says, I'll have
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what she's having, Right, I was like, what is it? And
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so, being as you know, pretty direct and frank kind of person that
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I am, I said, all right, Janine, what do you do?
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And she knew exactly what I meant and she said, I'm meditate And
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this is the first time ever because I love fashion and you know, I'm
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into book guys, and you know, I'm just like a girl's girl kind
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of love makeup and hair stuff. And I never knew anybody at this point
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in my life that meditated. It was almost thirty years ago, and I
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never that. For me, that idea, the idea of someone who actually
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meditated was like this god looking guy that's up on a mountaintop with a long
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beard and you know, long hair, wearing a white robe and a yogi
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position. And that was what I thought. So here's this hip chick from
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San Ramon, California. You know, she's got a husband, she's got
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a dog, she's into it obviously hair. You know, I really related
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with her on a lot of levels. And I'm like meditate. And so
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she started talking about how she does this form of guided meditation, and I
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said, can I have your meditate teacher's number? Because it was literally like
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you, she's got something that I've been searching for and I don't want to
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search for it. What do I have to do to get it? And
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so I was dialing and if you remember, back then, Victor, the
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phones were those big brick phones. I was dialing out as I was walking
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out of the salon, this meditation teacher, which finally about a week later,
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I got to connect with her and as I sat, I went to
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her home and again, never was into any of this. I was very
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normal. I was a cheerlea order, I was on cheerod. I was
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a palm palm girl in high school. So this was you know, I
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was Scottsdale, Arizona, lived in a bubble up until I traveled to Chicago.
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And now here I am in San Ramon, California, and I go
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to this woman's house and she's got you know, clinky clanky new age music
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going on, and she's got candles and incense and it smells like marijuana which
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was actually sage, and you know, can't statues of angels, and I
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am thinking what am I doing here? And she brings me into her family
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room, which has no furniture in it, but I cushioned, so I
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sit on this very low cushion to the floor and she looks at me right
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in my eyes and she said, you create your own reality. And something
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in me just like went finally yes, you know, it was like oh,
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and it was like I was born in that moment, and there was
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there was just this awareness of, yes, there is something more. I
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create my own reality, how my mind kicked it? How do I do
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that? And so she started talking about thoughts. Our thoughts are either attractive
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or they're repelling to either what we want or don't want, And in that
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moment was another one of those mind blown kind of my thoughts, What do
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you mean my thoughts? I mean, I know I have thoughts, but
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I am my thoughts. And she was explaining to me be the one that
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observes the thoughts. And so she gave me a homework assignment, go home
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for a week and just pay attention to what you are thinking. And I
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did. And I couldn't believe how negative I was, how judgmental about myself
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or others or God or you know, life in general. I could not
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believe it. And as I as I told my best friend, you know
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has no means that all my life. It's like, God, I'm really
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negative. I'm really like getting this is crazy, Like I'm hearing these thoughts
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that are in my head and it's like it's brutal in here. It's like
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I'm beaten myself down constantly. And she goes, God, you're the most
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positive, upbeat, optimistic person I know and I and you're so, you
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know, uplifting and inspiring. I'm like, what, so, what's going
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on between inside my head and what I'm projecting out into the world. It
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was totally incongruent, and that became really my path is really being able to
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let go of those places, that old programming, that automatic thinking which all
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of us do, that automatic vibration of say, worry and fear, which
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is very common humanly, and being able to spend more time in giggles and
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joy and appreciation and laughter and connection. And even around this time, my
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sister committed suicide. And my sister was eleven years older than me. So
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because of all this was happening, and I was going deep into the meditations
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with Melanie and my teachers were channeled beings that were channeled through Melanie and a
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couple of other people, I was had a very high, very deep,
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high connection to my higher self, so that I saw the death and the
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suicide as a very different thing, and it was an opportunity for me to
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heal deeper parts of me. And so my second book I ever wrote was
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called Why Did She Choose Suicide? Because for me, I could guess,
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I could think about why she did it and speculate what we could have done
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differently, and all these things, but the fact is she chose what she
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chose, and now is still I had my whole life in front of me,
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and I want to still make it a great life, and I don't
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want to end up like her, and I don't want to be like I
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was. Just like this numbing in my head is like a person beating me
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down in my head all day every day is trying to strive and do better
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and quiet that part that never would and it wasn't until I learned to master
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my energy, master those thoughts connect with a higher mind instead of my physical
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mind, which is important and we all need it and logical and you know,
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very very very good to function as a human being, but also and
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also connecting with that part that's such the higher part, the energy part,
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the source part, whatever you want to call that, God universe, that
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part that each of us that have breath have with us co creating in this
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very now moment. When did you first recognize the power of manifestation in your
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life? And how did this blossom? Well, it was around that time
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and because Melanie said, up, my thoughts create my reality. And so
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I started thinking about, well, what what do I want? And I
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wanted to get a new job. I quit my job that I that I
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had from in Chicago, that what I moved with to San Ramon, California,
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and I was in a hiatus for a while. So one of the
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first time in my life that I didn't work since I was fourteen years old,
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because I worked for my dad and then just continue to work. And
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so it was this period of time of huge spirituality and growth. And I
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started going to therapy and you as I was doing meditation, I was listening
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to Wayne Dyer and Mary Anne Williamson and as I would walk and just really
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had a lot of space for myself, learned how to do yoga. I
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mean really a time where it was great depth into myself and with that I
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would think about what I wanted and was getting really deliberate. I was also
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learning about the differences between a lack of mentality and being satisfied or being even
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abundant. And so I was drawing to me a lot of different teachers at
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that time. Again, this is pre internet, and you know, it
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wasn't like I could go into a Barnes and Noble and say, I'm looking
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how to create my own reality. You know, those books were likeucked away,
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and they weren't. It wasn't said like that. Those were the witch
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books or the you know, the voodoo books in the back. You know
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what I'm saying. And I remember, and here's the day. Honestly,
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I love that you asked me this question, Victor, because I had a
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lot of little like ooh, look what I created, and ooh, look
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what I created, and you know, created a husband and a step son,
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and you know, a house that I wanted because I remember living in
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this when I first moved to San Ramon, a one bedroom house with a
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very strange woman and she wouldn't she didn't believe in any type of pest control.
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So there were ants and stuffs in the kitchen, and so I didn't
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want to go down there and cook, and you know, so it was
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just a very one of the lowest points in my life. And I remember
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looking at this house that I thought, someday, I want to live in
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a house like that, and I have a husband and you know, maybe
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have kids. That's in the picture. And and here I was. I
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had this moment of wow, I'm living in a house that I pictured myself
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being in. I don't have my own child, but there's that step son.
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He's five years old and adorable and loves me. I love him.
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I'm and I'm married, and I realized, I'm like, wow, how
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did I I asked that question deliberately, How did I do that? I
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know I did a lot of things, and I focused on that and I
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did how did I actually manifest? And then it was like the answer started
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just coming boo boo, boo boom. And then that's when the book started
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coming through me. So every book I've ever written, and I've written seven
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of them and another went on the way. My eighth went on the way
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coming out next next May twenty twenty five, every single book has been downloaded
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through me so that I can share what I've done to manifest certain things like
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que of Success, for example, was all about work and money, and
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I share my stories in there of what I did and what I didn't do,
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and what I wish I did and what works better and coalescing all of
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those books into The Desire Factor, which is my latest book, which literally
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is a step by step formula that of course was you know, channeled through
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me, was given through me by those questions that I ask still, like
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most people do, how do we manifest? Like, what is the step
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by step process if I want to if I want to get that goal,
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whatever that goal is that accomplishment. Is there a step by step process in
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doing that? That's what the desire factor is. So before we get into
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the books, let's talk a little bit more about a couple of items.
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You say in your work that the law of attraction in and of itself is
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not enough. Why because understanding law of attraction is one thing, but it's
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applying and understanding how to master our energy so that their law of attraction is
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reflecting reflecting back to us we deliberately want. So someone might be focused on,
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say, law of attraction, but they are so focused on what they're
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doing that they're not being real with their emotions. They're trying to positive think
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or visualize themselves so much in the mental realm like mindset kind of stuff,
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that they forget that there's four bodies that we have. We have our mind,
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we have our emotional body, we have our actual physical body, and
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then we have our energy body, and we have consciousness. We have free
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will and choice. We have our own will to choose how we want to
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think, how we want to what words we want to say, how we
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want to perceive a situation, how we want to feel, and then what
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actions that we want to take. And law of attraction is just a mirror
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giving us back what we are sending out. Haus knowing about law of attraction,
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it's only understanding one third of the formula because we have to know we
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are energy receivers. Everything's energy is now, you know, Einstein said it,
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modern science want of physics. Everything is energy. We know this now
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and that includes every physical form. At one point was just unmanifested energy.
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And what's not manifested, like the air in front of our faces, or
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the space between the head and the roof of your car, or the ceiling,
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that's unmanifested energy. It's still energy nonetheless, so as breath. And
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so when we understand that we are energy receivers, that we're always taking in
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energy, like I said, breath if well, as long as we're alive,
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we're always going to be taking in energy, and as long as we
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are alive, we are going to be expelling energy. That inhale and the
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exhale well along with that that inhale x kind of thing. We are an
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energy receiver, we are an energy container, meaning we always will have life
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force or breath in us until we don't, and then as we do,
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we are an energy transmitter. And that's where then law of attraction responds to
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our vibration. But most people are trying to like force and do very deliberate
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and almost it's almost like becoming exhausting for people, all the stuff they're trying
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to do to manifest, and so it becomes like such an effort when manifesting
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needs to be that feminine flowing ease energy of holding the of holding that space,
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so receiving in and connecting with the energy that of joy for example,
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or passion or safety or freedom or connection and whatever that or peace, calm,
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compassion. These are all like keys on a piano. There are all
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certain frequencies or notes if you will, that have vibration and that are interpreted
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by us. So when someone says joy and joy feels good, it's like,
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oh joy, and you start talking about joy, start thinking about things
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that bring you joy, You get on a frequency get and it's like playing
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that note over and over and over again, and if someone mentions a different
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one, like maybe passion, passion feels different than joy. But as we
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start to feel our way into our own meanings and our own connection with these
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states of being, we actually can then connect with that energy. So we
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can decide to feel joy and let that be the energy that we receive and
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then hold in our container. And then as we're focusing our consciousness, our
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thoughts, our words, all that, it becomes so much easier and effortless
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because there's a moment that's already happened within us energetically, and with that strong
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momentum, law of attraction PA of attraction just kicks in and gives us more
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of that and it just feels it. Just believe me, I've done it
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both ways where the effort white knuckle you know, focus is really hard,
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you know, that way, and then the easy way where it's like I
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get to receive the energy, I could feel the energy if I have any
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split energy, when we can talk about that, that's something to process and
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release so that I come back into alignment with what I want to feel,
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success, freedom, contentment, whatever I get to choose. And as I'm
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focusing on that I'm creating that momentum, and then my actions and the things
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that I do to show up in opportunities or when I take the first step
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in doing something, that's when something forms itself into an opportunity, into a
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relationship, into a stack of money, into whatever it is that somebody desires.
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Before we get into the desire factor, let's discuss your New York Times
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best selling book, The Art of Having It All, A Woman's Guide to
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Unlimited Abundance. You share the precise steps you took to create radical turnarounds in
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the midst of potentially devastating real life situations. What happened? What do you
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share in the book? Why did you specifically write it for women? Well,
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there's a lot of questions right there, and there's so much to say.
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The reason wrote I wrote it for women, and the reason it came
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to be, I'll just start there, is because I was out promoting my
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other book that was co written with Rebecca Grotto and is called Taming Your Alpha
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Bitch, and it had gone on the New York Times list as well,
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and so I was continuing to do pr with that, and I went to
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a publicity summit and I walked up to a freelance writer for New York magazine,
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and I had thought I had the perfect pitch for her. I was
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so excited walked up to her and I said, what do all New York
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women want? And she said what? And I said, they want it
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all? And she looked at me and she goes, women can't have it
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all. And I said, excuse me. I'd never actually heard. There
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was rumors of it. There was people that I had heard, you know,
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say something like that, but I never had someone actually say to my
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face women can't have it all. And I said why and she said,
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because they're overworked, they're exhausted, they're trying to spread themselves toothin and and
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you know. And I said to her, it just came through. I
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go, but having it all doesn't mean doing it all. And she goes,
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well, there's a book you need to read. And she gave me
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the name. And I will not say the name of this book, said
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I want to anybody to read it. It was she. I later bought
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the book, and I was angered because it was a woman that, by
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most women's standards, has it all, and she's telling other women, disempowering
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them creating this leave. And she actually works for a university, which maybe
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more infuriated that she's seeking this into minds of young girls that they need to
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limit themselves. So choose a pathway of a career or choose a pathway of
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a family. You can't do both, when this woman had clearly both,
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and I had that, and many of my clients had that or not because
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having it all, like I talk about in the book, isn't the white
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picket fence and two point five kids. I don't know how you can have
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half a kid. Maybe it's the dog that they're talking about, the two
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point five kids, with the white picket fence and all of that. That
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could be someone's desire, But for somebody else it could be not being married
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and not having kids. And we have to look at what are our own
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definitions of having it all? What are our own you know? Because men
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are never told you can't have at all? But why are women? And
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so that's why for women, because this was to empower women that you really
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can have. Let's get the habit all out of there. You can have
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every single aspect of your life that something that you truly love, because we
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are divine designed divinely designed to have well being and wholeness, to have abundance
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and success, to have love and support and everything in between. And we
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are. It even says in biblical times, you know, Christ even said
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seek the Kingdom of God. He didn't say take a little bit or go
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for just your own that you think you can allow or that you think you're
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worthy of. He said, go for it. And so if you're looking
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at your own life as it relates to your body, to your finances,
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to your careers, to your hobbies and things that you enjoy doing, your
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time and money, freedom, your intimate relationship or your other social relationships,
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spiritual aspects, you know, your mental and emotional health in all of those
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aspects, what do you want? Would you absolutely love? Because having it
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all is knowing that you can and then having the processes and the tools and
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the things to do in order to create it. The wisdom of my guest,
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Christy Whitman, we're going to be talking about her book The Desire Factor,
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How to embrace your materialistic nature to reclaim your full spiritual power. Christy,
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please share with our listeners where they can get your books and find out
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more about you and your work. Absolutely thank you. So you go to
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Christiwhitman dot com anyway you spell it, you're going to get there. But
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it's Christy C. H R I S T. Y Whitman w H I
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T M A N dot com, Christiwitman dot com. And you can get
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to Amazon, Barnes and Noble anywhere they sell books. It's just the Zirefactor.
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Dot Com is also another place you can get it. And we'll be
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back with more of Christie after these words. On the Own Times Radio Network,
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the cutting edge of conscious radio. Home Times Radio IOMFM. Ome Times
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Magazine is one of the leading online content providers of positivity, wellness, and
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personal empowerment. A philanthropic organization, their net proceeds are funneled to support worldwide
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charity initiatives via Humanity Healing International. Through their commitment to creating community and providing
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conscious content, they aspire to uplift humanity on a global scale. Home Times
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co creating a more conscious lifestyle. Back on Destination Unlimited, My guest this
25:42
week is Christy Whitman. We're going to be talking about her book The Desire
25:47
Factor. How to Embrace your materialistic nature to reclaim your full spiritual power.
25:53
What inspired this book. And you have materialistic and spiritual. Now no one
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would think that those would be mutually exclusive, but they're really not, are
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they They're not. In order to have material you need the spirit. We
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talked about in the first segment that everything is energy, and in order to
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have something become beautiful, you have to have the energy of beauty to create
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that beautiful, to create that image of beauty. So energy, whatever energy
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or frequency we bring in, that is what's going to create our experience in
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the formed world. And so this book was inspired, interestingly enough, as
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a lot of my books are on cruise ships or vacations, especially when I'm
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on bodies of water. But I was many years ago when I first met
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my husband of seventeen years. He was my boyfriend at the time, and
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my mom and dad and I and Frederick went on a two week trip to
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Italy and we were traveling all around and we went to Venice, and when
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we got to Venice, I was just amazed because it was the first time.
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I'm just I love fashion, and I love the artisticness of you know,
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say a designer that creates a beautiful shoe or handbag, and I just
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have passion for that I always have. And so we get to Venice and
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it was like one designer after another. It was like, oh my god.
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I felt like I was like on the yellow brick road. There was
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Your and Fendi and Valentino. My you know, it was incredible. And
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so my boyfriend at the time is watching me go in and out of these
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stores and like, oh, oh my god, and smelling this and going,
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look at this gown. You know, I picked up this like five
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thousand dollars Valentino gown and he's like looking at me with the deer, you
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know, deer in headlight looked at me. And so we go and we're
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on this gondola ride and we get after the beautiful sunset and gondola ride,
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which I thought for sure he was going to ask me to marry him,
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and he didn't. So that was very disappointing at the end because every time
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he went to go clear his throat and talk to the gondolier, I thought
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he was going to pop the question. He did it. I was so
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mad at the end of them that it was such a beautiful scene, but
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I was like, you know, bummed out. So we go to dinner
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and he says to me. He goes, I don't I don't think I
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can afford you. And I said, what what are you talking about?
28:25
And he goes, I saw the way your eyes lit up when you saw
28:29
that Valentino dress. And and I'm like, where am I going to wear
28:33
a Valentino dress? Like, like really? And he and I said,
28:38
by the way, you don't need to afford me. I'm going to afford
28:41
myself. And someday, someday soon We're going to come back to Venice and
28:47
I'm going to go into these stores with the feeling that I could buy whatever
28:52
I want. I'll buy something or not, but that feeling that I could
28:56
buy whatever I want in the store. And I said that someday I'm an
29:00
come back with that feeling of that unlimitedness of doing what I do helping people
29:06
better their lives. So seven years later, we were able to take my
29:11
mom and my dad and our two boys on this wonderful Mediterranean cruise and we
29:18
happened to stop in Venice and it was my dad's birthday and we went into
29:25
San Marcos Square and we all had, you know, some desserts for my
29:27
dad, and there was a band playing there and got to saying happy birthday
29:32
and Italian and my dad and so we as we say, we brought the
29:36
two sets of kids back on the boat. My parents went on their way,
29:38
and the kids went into the daycare, and my husband and I went
29:42
back. And this was my moment to shop that because I had that feeling,
29:47
I had that as my reality. And I went into a bunch of
29:51
different stores. We were having fun and a beautiful day of having pasta and
29:55
oh it is incredible, and just having a great time as a couple.
29:59
And I I went into Duljangabanha and I saw the purse and this was it.
30:03
I made my choice, super excited, and I get back on the
30:07
ship and I'm looking at this purse and what this purse represented to me.
30:11
It represented success, it represented lives changed. It represented a goal and intention
30:19
that came to fruition that that manifested. And so I'm looking at this purse
30:26
and I'm also appreciating the beauty of it. And I hear a voice in
30:30
the back of my head say, hey, you're so shallow, and I
30:36
was like looking for someone behind me. I was in my you know,
30:38
this beautiful room. It was all glass and the ocean as we were going
30:42
on the cruise, and I'm like, at who it was my sister inside
30:48
of my head. Now, my sister had committed suicide. It was twenty
30:52
five years ago, last year, and she hadn't been around for a while,
30:57
but here she was in my head and I thought about it and I'm
31:02
like, this is a representation of something that I achieved, a celebration,
31:10
it's something, it's a reward, it's something that it's like the you know,
31:15
the carrot at the end of the stick, and we all do that.
31:19
We have these desires where you know, we've got that carrot at the
31:25
end of the stick, or we really desire that home or that partner or
31:29
that perse or that vacation or that business or something that we deeply desire,
31:34
and when we think about it, it feels good when we when we feel
31:38
livened by it, we feel the passion of it. And then there's that
31:42
thing that pulls us back, that voice of doubt, or like in my
31:48
head, it was my sister's voice judging me, saying you're so gent,
31:52
you're so shallow, and that voice, it's like, what do you do
31:57
with that voice? Because that voice takes us off our focus. And that
32:05
voice is the one that says, well, isn't spirituality and materialistic? That
32:08
isn't that you know? Are those two totally different things? Right? And
32:13
it's what we learned. You don't want to be you're so materialistic, right,
32:19
even Madonna's saying about that in the eighties. You know, I am
32:22
a material girl. This is a material world. It is a material world
32:27
where everything in it is spiritual because everything in it is energy. Energy is
32:32
the essence of all of life. And so that Dulce and Gabona purse as
32:38
an example, you know, that idea for a beautiful purse now for someone
32:45
persons might not be their thing. You might be fishing for you, or
32:47
golfing, or it might be you know, I don't know, tractors or
32:52
whatever. It's something material you enjoy. For somebody might be jewelry or coin
32:58
collecting or something. But these things that kind of ground us to a sense
33:04
of ooh, this represents something. This represents something that feels good to me,
33:12
that is pleasurable. And when we have that, and then we have
33:17
that opposing voice that says, you're so materialistic, or you're so shallow,
33:23
or who do you think you are Rockefeller? Or who do you think you
33:29
are? Misnow at all? Or you know, nobody in my family has
33:32
ever gone to college. I'm too young to start a business. Who would
33:37
want to listen to me? Oh, I'm too old to start that business.
33:39
Those voices of doubt that pull us away, that are not in the
33:47
know of what our vision is. And because the deeper part of us,
33:53
the higher part of us, the one that gave us that idea in the
33:57
first place, the one that wants to create and have those with us,
34:00
and through us partnering and co creating, gave us that idea. We're the
34:05
receivers. We are energy receivers, we are energy containers, and we are
34:09
energy transmitters. And so that's up to us to allow ourselves to go,
34:15
WHOA, I've got these thoughts that are going in the not in the direction
34:21
of what I want. I'm not seeing myself having it. I'm seeing myself
34:24
not having it, and then be able to master our energy through processes,
34:32
through practical things that we can do, like what we talk about in the
34:37
desire factor. There's practical processes and energy mastery techniques so that you're knowing what
34:45
to do when life, you know, as they say, throws you lemons
34:50
or you know what I like to say, bush What when you're bushwhacked?
34:52
When the carpet the rug gets pulled out from under you, or someone get
34:58
your goat or you know some and when yanks you chain, or buttons push,
35:01
There's many ways of describing it. But when life kind of like knocks
35:07
us down, what do we do to get ourselves back up? What do
35:08
we do to align ourselves? What do we do to allow ourselves to connect
35:15
with the deeper part of ourselves so that we confine that alignment and find that
35:20
joy again because the higher part of ourselves doesn't go into judgment and worry and
35:25
criticism and fear and all that you share. That desire is the fuel for
35:31
every act of creation. How do we boost the octane in our desire to
35:37
rev up the creation? Well, ask yourself more, what do I want?
35:42
Because if you really think about it, and this is the biggest thing
35:44
I've seen over twenty I've been twenty three years. I've been a coach Law
35:47
of attraction coach specifically, and I've been certifying Law of Attraction coaches since two
35:53
thousand and eight with the Quantum Success Coaching Academy. I see people all the
35:59
time when it ask them what do you want? They go, well,
36:01
I don't want to get a divorce. No, I didn't ask you that,
36:06
what do you want? Well, I don't want to get stuck in
36:07
traffic? Didn't ask you that, what do you want? I don't want
36:13
to be late? Okay, what do you want? Right? I don't
36:16
want to gain more weight. As we keep focusing on what we don't want
36:23
that doesn't feel good, we are always thinking and in our minds we have
36:30
these images. We have these pictures of ourselves either in the past, which
36:34
we use as a reference point for who we're going to be in the future.
36:37
We cannot outcreate our self image. And when we are focused on our
36:45
flaws and what's wrong in our past, mistakes and all of these things.
36:50
When we're focused on what we do not want, we're in lack, which
36:54
lack never feels good. Whether you call it limitation, scarcity, lack,
37:00
lack does not feel good. And when we can neutralize ourselves, meaning let
37:07
ourselves focus on soothing our energy, focus on calming ourselves, focus on what
37:16
is called compassion, meaning it's a ah okay, I'm okay, whether it's
37:22
feeling the energy, giving ourselves a nice squeeze, telling ourselves something nice,
37:28
like you're going to be okay, right, refocusing out of the lack of
37:31
what's wrong and what we don't want into what we do want. So ask
37:36
yourself three questions. This is the best process that anybody could do ever.
37:40
If you start pivoting and asking yourself these three questions, your life absolutely will
37:46
change. I've seen it hundreds of thousands of times over the year and years,
37:51
and I've seen it in my life something on a daily basis to refocus
37:55
me. When you notice you're feeling bad, or you're bored, or just
38:00
don't you're not where you want to be. You just don't feel the pleasure
38:04
of the good that you want to feel in your life, stop what you're
38:07
doing and just ask yourself, what do I want? What do I want
38:10
at this moment, right now? What do I want at the segment of
38:15
my day? What do I want? What would I like right now?
38:21
I'd like to I'd like to get out in my car and take a breath,
38:24
or i'd like to I just I'd like to go to a playground and
38:30
sit in quiet. You know, I'd like to actually apologize to that person.
38:35
I'd like to feel this, you know, I'd like to make more
38:37
money. I'd like to find the partner, whatever it is, whether it's
38:40
this moment, the segment of your day, or a portion of your life.
38:45
Asking yourself, what do I want? And then let's just pause there
38:51
for a second. Because we're so accustomed to focusing on what we don't want.
38:58
Ask yourself what you don't want? If you can't think of what you
39:00
do want. If you're like, I have no idea what I want because
39:04
you've been so focused on what you don't you know what you don't want.
39:07
So it might be qualities and a partner. It might be a new job
39:10
or a new boss, you know, whatever it is, those qualities of
39:15
what you don't want, write them down and then ask yourself, what are
39:17
the opposite of that? So so this guy might be lazy, or this
39:22
woman might be you know, nagging. You know, I'd like someone that's
39:27
supportive. I would love someone that's motivated. Ask yourself, what's the opposite
39:31
of what you don't want. I don't want to be late. I want
39:34
to get there on time. I want to get there early, right I
39:37
don't want to gain weight. I'd like to stay in shape or lose the
39:42
weight. You know, I don't want to get a divorce. I want
39:45
to improve my relationship. So looking at what is the opposite, it seems
39:50
like it's so tiny and subtle, and really does that make a big difference.
39:53
It makes every difference in the world. Because what we say there are
39:59
very words are very, very worse. You can all go to watch your
40:02
Words dot com. It's a free seven day video on what to say and
40:07
what not to say. Because our words are creative. Our words spark creation,
40:13
just like desire sparks creation. If you're sitting there and you're hungry,
40:20
and you know you're hungry, but you have no desire to eat, or
40:23
you have no desire to get up and make yourself something to eat. If
40:28
you have no desire to do that, you're not going to get up and
40:30
do it. It's only until you have the desire to you're hungry enough to
40:36
your thirsty enough to get yourself up or to call or to do whatever it
40:40
is that you need to do to feed yourself. Desire creates it all.
40:45
And when we're focused on what do we want, then why do we want
40:51
it? Because the third is and how will we feel? How do you
40:57
think you're going to feel? What do you want? Just starting there all
41:00
right, focusing on what do I want? Once you've got something that you
41:02
know you want. I'd like to have a life partner. I'd like to
41:06
get a new job. I'd like to start a business. I'd like to
41:07
quit that job. I'd like to retire whatever that is. I want this.
41:13
Why do you want it? Start to really asking yourself why. Well,
41:15
because I'd like to travel, I'd like to see the world. I'd
41:20
like to settle down. I'd like to have someone to share my life with.
41:23
And then what's the third question? What do I want? Why do
41:28
I want it? How do I want to feel? Ultimately, how do
41:30
you want to feel with that partner once you're retired? How do you want
41:34
to feel? I want to feel free, I want to feel secure,
41:36
want to feel connected and know that that energy, that state of being exists
41:43
right here, right now. You don't have to actually go get someone or
41:46
do ten other things to feel that way. You can feel and open up
41:51
to the energy of peace right now. You can feel and open up to
41:54
the energy of joy right now. It's available, like laying the peace that
42:00
note is available and opening up to it. Imagining all your cells are like
42:07
tiny cups, you know, turn upward and you're just being doused in joy
42:12
energy. Now you start to put your mental focus on what it looks like
42:15
to be joyful, what it feels like to be joyful, and now every
42:20
momentum of all the energy starts to focus there, and then you feel joy.
42:25
My guest is Christy Whitman. We're talking about her book The Desire Factor,
42:30
How to Embrace your materialistic nature to reclaim your full spiritual power. We'll
42:36
be back with more of Christy after these words on the Own Times Radio network.
42:40
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Right People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals five oh one Front Street in Norfolk,
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Virginia two three five one oh back on Destination Unlimited. My guest this
43:58
week is Christy Whitman. We're talking about her book The Desire Factor, How
44:01
to embrace your materialistic nature to reclaim your full spiritual power. Christy, you
44:08
share seven universal principles and the Desire Factor. I know you address these in
44:15
depth in the book, but please give our listeners a taste of these principles
44:19
and how they work. Let's start with alignment, Ah, love it and
44:23
Yes these seven principle, all principles all build on each other like energy builds
44:29
on each other. So think of it as like the manifestation energy that goes
44:34
through each of these phases and then pops out. So the first one is
44:38
alignment. We've been talking about that the whole time. Victor is really finding
44:43
what you want and aligning with that energy, aligning your consciousness with what it
44:50
is that you want. And the second principle is the principle of focus.
44:53
After you've aligned yourself, you've got you've got clear, you know what you
44:58
want, why you want it, how you want to feel. Then understanding
45:02
that we've been talking about this a little bit too, is that there's going
45:07
to be some doubts that come up. There'll be some programmed limited programming that
45:15
comes up that may make you worry or think about the future, and maybe
45:17
there's some lack. Remember, whenever there's a split, there's a perspective or
45:22
a consciousness of lack, and as we feel it and then bring it back
45:28
into focus and back into alignment of what we want, then we're creating all
45:34
the momentum in creating it. So the next step is that once you're focused
45:38
on what you want. And here's where the rub is right. We're human
45:42
beings. We notice something. If we say I want a million dollars and
45:45
we're focused on the million dollars and then we look in our bank account and
45:49
go, okay, well I don't have it yet, or I really want
45:52
a life partner, and we're focused on the life partner and all the qualities,
45:57
and then we will look in our bed and we're like, he's not
46:00
yet or she's not there yet. You know, we're not stupid. It's
46:04
like we can see that we're not gonna hello, they're not there. But
46:08
when we focus on the fact that they're not there, and then we start
46:13
to feel the disappointment or start to feel the impatience or the doubt or the
46:17
worry, that's where we need to focus back on the joyful expecting. So
46:24
expecting, and that's what we were talking about early earlier, seeing yourself succeed,
46:30
seeing yourself having what you want, and having that joyful expectation in your
46:37
mind as a as a visual that you hold as a self awareness, as
46:42
a self concept of you having the joyful experience while in the relationship. Not
46:49
most people visualize the guy or the relationship, but they even take themselves out
46:53
of the equation. They think he's going to be the one that makes me
46:55
happy, or that business or that many in the bank. You want to
47:00
see yourself in that visual with having the contentment, having the security, having
47:07
the freedom, having the passion, the purpose, whatever it is. And
47:10
so that's that joyful expectancy, which then leads into so you got alignment is
47:15
number one focus. Number two joyful expectancy. I just have to jump in
47:21
and say, when I heard the words joyful expectancy, it sounds almost like
47:23
you're giving birth to a baby. Well, if you kind of are,
47:29
you're taking something that doesn't exist yet and you're putting your focus. Everything's created
47:35
twice, right, first in our minds and then in reality, or first
47:37
in the energy field, and then in the physical form. So you are
47:43
your birthing and manifestation. You are joyfully expecting that someday you're going to be
47:47
holding that baby, or you're going to be holding that their hand, or
47:51
you're going to be having that money in the bank. There's a joyful expectancy,
47:54
a birthing of something that you want. Then there's having. Yeah,
48:00
So having this is where we get it gets a lot of fun because most
48:04
people in understanding law of attraction and vibration have heard a time or two and
48:08
many from probably many different experts and authors that are out there that you have
48:15
to become the vibrational match to what you want. And that's true, and
48:20
because if you're in lack of it, then you're not a vibrational match.
48:23
So how do you become a vibrational match? That's the essence that you already
48:28
have it. Because again when we're in the oh, I don't have it
48:30
yet, Wednesday coming, where are they? How's the money? I'd like
48:36
waiting for the bags of money to fly on, you know, land on
48:38
my head and they're not coming yet, or so and so is not having
48:43
me on their talk show, or you know, I'm not on that stage
48:45
yet, or I'm not doing this yet. When we are in that space
48:50
of lack and then we're off on our vibrations, So by focusing our mental
48:55
aspect and everything at this point is both you know, everything energy, but
49:00
it's a lot of mental when you're doing the joyful expectancy. When you have
49:05
it, it's an acceptance of it. You've accepted it as something that yes,
49:10
I want this and therefore to feel it as if you already have it,
49:15
feel it as if it's already done, because if you look around,
49:20
whatever it is, if you're driving in your car right now, there was
49:22
a time that you actually wanted that car when you didn't have it, even
49:27
if it's the clunkiest car you've ever had, and on the road, there
49:30
was a time where you didn't have a car and you didn't care what kind
49:34
of car you drove. You just wanted to get some wheels. And whether
49:37
it's now you're not you had a clunky car and now you're driving your dream
49:42
car, there was a time that you didn't have that dream car. So
49:45
everything that we now have, there's almost a feeling of like, yep,
49:52
next, you know, like we take it for granted. We're in that
49:54
vibrational match to it, and we could look at it as you know some
49:59
of it. Us have increased in what we make over the years. Right,
50:04
so maybe when we're in in high school, we didn't make very much
50:07
money, and then we went if we went to college or went into a
50:09
craft, right, we were building what we made and that sort of thing.
50:14
As we grow then we start to make more money and then as we
50:19
make more money, we get comfortable, you know, I mean as we
50:22
make a certain amount of money. And that's why some people say, oh,
50:25
you know, rich people are never satisfied with what they make because there's
50:29
that more and more and more and more and more. I'm comfortable here and
50:31
want more, or I'm not comfortable here or I'm not happy yet because they're
50:37
looking at money to be the thing that makes them happy or the guy or
50:40
whatever. If they come or if they change, if I don't, if
50:45
I have something, then I'll be okay. And what we're saying here is
50:50
feel what it feels like to have the person in your life now and now
50:55
you're not coming from a I need you, you know, the waiting for
51:00
you. Where have you been? You know, it's like, oh,
51:05
I've expected you, you expect him. Our mutual friend Victor ariel Ford,
51:10
she talks a lot about the soulmate secret and all that kind of stuff.
51:14
Yes, and that is absolutely one of the principles. Is you gotta feel.
51:19
When I was attracting my partner of seventeen years now, I would talk
51:24
to him and feel him telepathically. I would connect in meditations, feeling his
51:30
soul and feeling our energy moving together. I had him in my life before
51:36
I actually physically had him in my life. So nexte yes loving most powerful
51:44
vibration in the universe. When you love what you have, when you look
51:49
around and see what that clunky car or that dream car you're driving, When
51:52
you love it and you appreciate it, you actually energize your abundance and your
51:59
attractor factor or if you want to talk about that, of a desire factor.
52:04
It's like love makes you so magnetic. And then, of course there
52:07
is surrender, which surrender is not giving throwing in the towel. Surrender is
52:14
a I'm worried over here. I've got to master my energy, get myself
52:17
written back into focus. So I'm letting go of this thought. I'm surrendering
52:23
this resistance. I'm going to let go of that belief that I can't have
52:28
what I want, and I'm going to shift my belief into it's possible for
52:31
me to have what I want. It's not only possible or probable, it's
52:37
inevitable because I create my own reality. So I'm surrendering all the places where
52:42
I play a victim or I'm surrendering all the places where I feel that I'm
52:45
limited, and then just letting yourself feel how great you feel, you take
52:52
action. All that energy builds in your consciousness so that the action you take
52:59
is literally it's almost like being on a fast moving river. The momentum of
53:05
that takes you so fast, it's like putting a turbo booster in your car.
53:09
When you do take the action, it's the right action. It's got
53:13
the right flow. It takes less time, it takes less space. It
53:17
just the timing is actually perfect. Right timing and right flow. Please tell
53:23
us about the Quantum Success Coaching Academy. Yeah, So in two thousand and
53:29
eight, I was asked. It was a surround sound week. I had
53:34
four different people asked me to certify them because they were coached by me and
53:38
they saw how effective their lives were changing with what I was doing, and
53:43
nobody else was doing this. So four different people asked me to certify them,
53:47
and I thought, okay, Universe, I'm listening. I've got this
53:51
loud and clear. These four people don't know each other, these are independent
53:53
people of each other. They're all asking and very adamant. They want me
53:59
to certify them. Not going where I got certified. They want to know
54:01
about the seven Essential Laws. They want to know about abundance, they want
54:06
to know the structure of call. They want to know how to do what
54:08
I do. So I put pen to paper and like all of my books,
54:13
within two hours, the entire course was channeled through me, and I
54:19
launched the first Coaching Academy class in the fall of two thousand and eight,
54:23
and we have certified over three thousand Law of Attraction certified coaches. And it's
54:32
just it's brilliant. It's an online course now where you do get live support
54:37
twice a month with a thing called office Hours or coaching Club, but everything's
54:44
online so you could take it at your leisure. There is support because you
54:46
do have homework and things that actually have to check a box in order to
54:51
get certified. But it is the most transform transformative process, and our clients
54:58
have said the most comprehensive coach training program out there, so I'm really proud
55:02
of it. Victor, Well, wonderful Christy Whitman her book The Desire Factor,
55:07
How to Embrace your materialistic nature to reclaim your full spiritual power. Christie,
55:13
one more time, please share with our listeners with and get your books
55:15
and find out more about you and your amazing work. Thank you. You
55:17
can go to Christy Whitman dot com. Or you can go to watch your
55:22
Words and that's plural, Watch your Words dot com. And how can they
55:29
find out more about the Quantum Success Coaching Academy. Oh, you can go
55:31
to Quantum Success Coachingacademy dot com. So that's pretty easy, right, Victory.
55:38
They can just google you put in Google a Quantum Success Coaching Academy,
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or go to Quantum Success Success Coachingacademy dot com and that'll get you there.
55:49
Christy, thank you so much for joining us and sharing all of this wonderful
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information, this powerful information about how people can put this work into their lives.
55:57
Thank you so much. Thank you for having me, Victor. Thanks
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so everyone for listening, and thank you for joining us on Destination Unlimited.
56:04
I'm Victor the Voice Furman. Have a wonderful week