Latest / CALL ME MISTRESS / KINKY STALKERS! OMG! THE THINGS WE DO...

Transcript

KINKY STALKERS! OMG! THE THINGS WE DO... · CALL ME MISTRESS

0:21
Hi, welcome to the latest episode of Mr. Smea's Dungeon.
0:24
I'm your Hostess, Mr. Smea, and you know I've got the Barbie.
0:29
All right, so Barbie, we are going to do 3.
0:32
We're we're, we're not going to get through it and.
0:38
We're going to lock in, don't worry.
0:40
Look bitch, we might have to do a part three at some point.
0:43
And 5:00. And 6:00 and 7:00.
0:45
OK Barbie, so today we're going to talk about fucking stalkers.
0:53
You love it. I like seeing you.
0:58
All right, we're going to do it now.
0:59
I will say this about kinky. Now.
1:02
Do you remember a couple weeks ago when we had this old man and
1:06
you had him bent over on the Gurney and we had to pull the
1:10
trash can up to his asshole? Now we talked about this, OK,
1:20
because you're so loud and crazy.
1:21
My dogs have just accepted it. At this point you don't even
1:26
phase them anymore. Good.
1:28
OK, desensitizing them. They're all just like, yeah,
1:31
yeah, OK. That man traumatized me.
1:33
He. Did and the interesting thing of
1:35
it was I blocked him again on everything you've had to.
1:39
Block him a few. Times, several times and several
1:41
phone calls and blah blah blah. You know, I've dealt with a lot
1:45
of fucking shit in the last two months.
1:47
I can tell you this a. Lot of shit from him
1:48
specifically. Actually, yes, indeed, on every
1:53
level. Literal shit, literal all over
1:55
the floor. Yes.
1:57
So Needless to say, he contacted me and he's like, yes, this is
2:02
so. And so I'm contacting you again.
2:07
Can I come see you? And I said, look, we've had this
2:09
conversation. You directly fired him.
2:12
You weren't even like haha maybe you can't come back.
2:14
You were like you were disgusting.
2:16
I hate you. Leave.
2:17
Pretty much, I said. Nobody wants to see.
2:19
You. No one does.
2:20
So he got really creative. Now Ruby Red, she has a
2:26
brilliant website. I'm going to post it on our
2:29
website. So if anyone wants to see it,
2:31
she's traveling right now to, I want to say 6 states.
2:36
So she's going like Texas, New York, like she's going all over
2:40
right now and she's doing Dom work and she's incredible,
2:45
great, great girl. And so he thought, oh, I'm going
2:49
to contact her and see if she'll see me.
2:52
So at the same time, he messaged me and when he got my response
2:56
of no, we're done. We've had this conversation.
3:00
He writes Ruby and then Ruby in turn.
3:03
She screenshots the conversation.
3:06
Because you already told Ruby we fired him.
3:08
Yes, I told her she was actually here the other day.
3:11
Yeah, and she did a fantasy Friday.
3:14
She did it with that whore Al. Oh, nice.
3:17
And I'm going to be posting that this coming Friday.
3:21
So Needless to say, Ruby tells me.
3:25
Yeah, look what he said. And when I read it, it said
3:30
yeah, Mia said that nobody wants to see me.
3:33
Not you, not Barbie, not anybody.
3:37
Is that true? And Ruby was like, yeah, I hate
3:40
you too. Ruby's response was, you know,
3:44
you need to deal and go through Mia and quite truthfully, I
3:48
don't have an interest in seeing you either.
3:50
She was not lying to you about that.
3:52
I don't have an interest. It's not worth it.
3:54
It's not worth it, exactly. He doesn't disclose like what
3:58
he's going to do because I think he, I think he should on us on
4:01
purpose. Oh. 100%.
4:03
Because it wasn't just a little. Poop no.
4:05
It was like I'm pushing this out of my ass.
4:08
Oh yeah, so funny thing. So he kept messaging me, and
4:13
then he kept messaging Ruby. So I finally screenshot the
4:17
conversation between him and Ruby and I said you want to do
4:19
this bitch? OK So I called him, well like he
4:24
is. He is a fucking pussy.
4:26
He didn't answer. He didn't answer the phone.
4:29
So what I did was I called him and I left a voicemail to him
4:32
and I said listen you little fucking cockroach, I know where
4:36
you live. I will come and harass you.
4:40
I'll tell your coworkers. I'll tell anybody on your
4:44
fucking Facebook about your bullshit.
4:47
Yeah, don't fuck with me, right? Yes, we were just having this
4:51
conversation before the podcast. We were talking about other
4:53
stuff. Don't fuck with people who have
4:56
your cardinal secrets. Like if someone has a secret
5:00
that can ruin your life, don't fuck with them.
5:03
Right 'cause like. If you fuck with them too hard,
5:05
what's going to stop them from turning on and going?
5:07
Now your church knows you like it in the ass.
5:11
Now your grandkids have seen you stretched asshole on Facebook.
5:14
Are we happy? I wouldn't go that long, but
5:22
seriously it it's just beyond the length of petty and what you
5:27
know he has done at this. Point like wants to see a pro
5:31
Dom, he needs manners because at this point he's pissed off every
5:35
pro Dom that works in this dungeon and that's like what,
5:39
probably 5-6 of us? Yeah.
5:41
That's you know, they're like pro doms in our area already
5:44
aren't that common to successfully piss off 5 or 6.
5:49
It's crazy work. Like.
5:50
Just go somewhere else. So you want me to tell you about
5:54
someone else that kind of pissed me off, yeah.
5:57
I'm getting the tea, I go to Mia's house and before we even
6:01
turn on the thing, there's like 30 minutes of debriefing we have
6:03
to do. Briefing of me is Oh my God,
6:07
it's. So true.
6:08
Pissed you off. I want to.
6:09
Know. All right, so you know the
6:11
lovely person we've talked about out of Virginia.
6:15
Oh yeah. OK, so he contacted me nine
6:19
months ago and we kind of started a baseline friendship.
6:22
He loved the podcast. He's the one who left me the
6:26
negative review and the positive.
6:28
Review Has he contacted you since last time we talked?
6:31
No, because this is what happened.
6:33
So the so the listeners will understand what happened.
6:36
I'll just give them the brief back story.
6:39
But he liked the podcast. He would write emails.
6:41
We told everybody, we told the listeners included about his
6:46
life. I never made fun of this poor
6:48
man because I said, you know, he has gone through great lengths,
6:52
spent thousands of dollars. Gave us permission to do so.
6:55
Very much so. Thank you for bringing that up.
6:58
So we basically acknowledged all of these things in his life that
7:03
have gone wrong. In the meantime, things begin to
7:08
escalate further when he tells me that, you know, he was my
7:11
soul mate and blah blah blah he. Reached out to me saying stuff
7:14
like that not about me, but about.
7:16
You about me, I. Love you on the podcast Mia.
7:18
I'm in love with her. I love Mia so much.
7:21
And see, I told him, I said, look, I fell in love with my
7:24
husband the first night we met. Like he and I had an instant
7:28
connection. You know, he didn't want to
7:31
leave. I mean, it was it was just
7:33
kismet. Honestly, it was great.
7:35
And to this day, it hurts me physically when we're not
7:40
together. I, I hate being apart from him,
7:42
you know, And so for this man who I don't know, I, I've seen
7:46
pictures of him. I've seen him on video briefly.
7:50
Never met him in person. He is a little older than me,
7:54
but, you know, he's been married.
7:56
He. I don't know if he's still with
7:58
his wife. I didn't even know, honestly,
8:00
what truth he was telling me. And what was, you know, made-up.
8:04
Made-up. Yeah.
8:06
You know, he told me that both of his children had were on the
8:09
spectrum. One was higher functioning, 1
8:11
wasn't. Then he tells me out of the blue
8:14
that I need to give him more attention because his whole
8:20
situation is his. He's living with his brother.
8:25
And this is not one of your submissives.
8:26
Right. Not at all.
8:28
So this guy, I did go on his Facebook and I went on there
8:32
after he told me that his brother who just left his wife,
8:37
he was living in his brother's apartment sleeping on his sofa
8:41
bed, that his brother has cancer now.
8:46
And, you know, his life is just, it sounds horrible, like he made
8:50
things sound bad. And then at the same time, I was
8:54
like, OK, I'm going to go on Facebook, you know, blah, blah,
8:57
blah. I go on Facebook.
8:59
His brother just got engaged. His brother is healthy and
9:02
happy. Just had a vacation in Cabo.
9:07
He doesn't even live in the same state.
9:09
He lives in a totally different state.
9:11
So it's like, OK, did he really even leave his wife?
9:14
Yeah, he's lying. He's lying completely.
9:16
Yeah. And you know, my thing of it is
9:19
I don't care if he left his wife.
9:21
I don't care. But that tells me that he only
9:24
told me that because he's thinking his in his mind.
9:27
Well, maybe there's a chance for us.
9:30
You know, and I, I've said this repeatedly.
9:32
I wasn't even going to bring this up on the the podcast.
9:35
I. Didn't want to give him the
9:35
validation. I didn't want to give him any
9:37
validation because initially I thought, OK, this is a potential
9:42
client. It was OK because I would meet
9:45
him as such and we would do a simple BDSM scene, whatever.
9:53
And Needless to say, it didn't turn into that because he told
9:58
me, Mia, you're right, I'm a little obsessed.
10:01
I can't see you clearly. This is the issue.
10:05
He. Didn't just say he couldn't see
10:06
you. He said I couldn't see you
10:08
because they were going to meet and do a session in a hotel I
10:10
believe. And he was like, I can't see you
10:13
because you won't leave. What?
10:17
Yeah. So you leave basically.
10:19
No, no, he was saying. Because I wouldn't let you leave
10:21
or something weird like that. It was weird.
10:24
Whatever he did, say it. Was a little scary.
10:28
Just a wee bit. And then at the same time, in
10:31
this conversation, he told me that he was seriously, you know,
10:35
threatened and jealous of Charles, you know, and you know,
10:41
Charles is, is here a lot, you know, he comes here to see me.
10:45
And, you know, I adore him. He adores me, you know.
10:48
But Charles also puts in the work.
10:50
He does. Charles isn't crying in the
10:52
ground going look at me, give me an engine.
10:55
Yeah, Charles is very honest with you.
10:58
Very much so. Very much so.
11:01
But ultimately, you know, because I said what I said in
11:05
honesty and I have never tried to, you know, create some type
11:10
of illusion of any sort to this person.
11:12
He got pissed and he wrote me this hate mail and he's like,
11:15
fuck you, you fucking cunt. And then I was like, wow, OK.
11:20
So the pendulum swung from being obsessed to hatred.
11:23
Oh my God, it's crazy. And I'm like, God, can we say
11:26
fucking Ted Bundy? Like what the fuck was that?
11:28
I know. I remember before y'all was
11:29
falling out, you were describing him to me and you're like, isn't
11:32
that fun? And I was like me?
11:33
That's so scary. He's like, look at him, he's
11:36
saying he's obsessed with me and I'm like me, I'd cry if a man
11:39
was consistently texting me messages going I love you, we're
11:43
soul mates, I want to be with you.
11:44
We should meet up. I'd be like, I'd be like so
11:50
scared. I think all the police.
11:51
I thought it was endearing. At first I thought it was.
11:54
Sweet. Me and you're.
11:55
Very different creatures. Very.
11:56
Different on that aspect, but sexually it seems like we're
11:59
very compatible. On agreeable, Yeah, sorry,
12:01
Dalton. So at the same time on all of
12:08
this, I will say that. So after I escalated and I
12:12
blocked him on everything, you know, he started calling me and
12:15
texting me and you know, and this was bullshit because, you
12:17
know, he's an hour ahead of me and I was getting like 5:00 AM
12:20
messages and calls. That's still 6:00 AM for him.
12:23
It's still pretty early. It's still early.
12:25
And I said, look, you've taken advantage of the fact that I've
12:28
given you my number. You have to stop.
12:30
It's done. So after that, after he created
12:34
a podcast, then he gets pissed off, he deletes his podcast, and
12:40
you know, it's basically a fuck you to me.
12:42
Podcast just like Impress. He was crazy.
12:45
He deleted it. I mean, he did, you know, like 7
12:48
plus episodes, you know, He put the time and effort into it, you
12:52
know, so and I sent him a microphone just to be nice to
12:56
help him get his first start, you know?
12:59
So. But he licked it.
13:03
OK, let's not get too crazy there, Barbie.
13:07
But he suckled on it to get all the Me A flavor out of there.
13:14
So after that, so I didn't hear any more from him and then like
13:19
four days later now, meanwhile, he told me what he likes
13:22
specifically, OK? He told me it was this, this and
13:26
this, all in the order. OK, all of a sudden I get this
13:30
e-mail from this guy named Eric Fairchild.
13:32
That doesn't sound made-up at all, does it?
13:35
None. It couldn't be like, you know,
13:37
Roger Smith or something really generic and not as attractive.
13:42
So Eric proceeds to write me and tells me exactly what it is he
13:47
likes exactly in the same order that this other guy did.
13:51
So, you know, he goes on to say, oh, are you going to stop in
13:55
Virginia? You know, and I heard, I heard
14:00
the podcast, are you in mourning?
14:03
You know, that that your friend. Oh I didn't.
14:06
I missed out on this part. I got to back up Barbie.
14:11
Fuck. I'll tell him real quick.
14:13
So in between him making this fake identity and basically him
14:17
and me having this falling out, he texted me up from his account
14:22
going, this is his daughter, he killed himself and you were in
14:27
his phone as his therapist. Like, I just wanted to talk to
14:29
you. Like if you found your dad dead,
14:32
you're not going through his phone and texting his therapist.
14:34
You know what I mean? So and Mia never spoke about
14:37
this on the podcast or told anybody.
14:40
So when Eric Fairchild comes through and is like, are you in
14:44
mourning me? It's like mourning what?
14:46
I never said anybody was dead. How would you know?
14:49
Exactly. Exactly.
14:52
And then on fat life, supposedly his daughter went on his
14:58
lifestyle account, you know? Because that's the first thing
15:01
I'm doing. If I find my dad, dad, I'm going
15:03
to go and see if he has a fat life account and.
15:08
You're going to post. This I'm going to post from it.
15:10
Yeah, that my dad killed himself.
15:12
Yeah, fuck you, Mia. But that is a really like, I
15:15
hate to say it, but that is a really like common thing for
15:20
like you see that a lot with like, I don't know you the the
15:24
jokes I hear a lot are older guys do that to younger girls to
15:27
manipulate them. Like if you leave me when I kill
15:29
myself and then they'll text you being like so and so is dead now
15:33
it's your. Fault.
15:34
Oh God. OK, well you know my.
15:39
Pants. Very nice.
15:44
It's over. You don't have to deal with them
15:45
anymore. Yeah, you know, and the thing of
15:48
it is I don't wish him ill will at all.
15:51
I really. Don't.
15:51
But he needs help. He needs a therapist and maybe
15:55
to do some inner reflection. Yeah, you know, I know he's on
15:59
medication. I know he has obviously a
16:02
psychological disorder but, and I wasn't going to get into this
16:06
about it, but my thing of it is it's been a rough couple of
16:10
months having to deal with that bullshit along with.
16:14
Actually, when you're not in a relationship with somebody,
16:17
having someone demanding that level of intimacy from you and
16:22
also mislabeling it in a way that makes you uncomfortable,
16:25
it's draining. Like, you know, I have this
16:28
person that I know in like our community that like is convinced
16:33
we're friends, but I've met him twice.
16:36
I don't talk to him. He's texted me like once or
16:38
twice on Instagram and he'll he'll go around going, Oh my
16:41
gosh, hi, it's so nice to see you.
16:44
And like tell people like introduce people to me and be
16:46
like, oh, this is my friend. And I'm like, you don't know me.
16:51
So I get that frustration of having him being like, we're
16:54
soul mates and you're like, I don't know you.
16:58
That's what I tried to, to really clarify with him because,
17:00
you know, I say to people, I'm very transparent, but what they
17:04
hear on the podcast is just the podcast.
17:07
And I'm joking. I'm I can be an absolute.
17:09
Idiot not to ruin the fantasy like what we talk about is
17:12
curated, you know, we talk about what we're going to talk about
17:15
beforehand. You're not just, it's not a spy
17:17
camera that this not just a like a conversation we'd be having
17:22
just normally, I mean, some of it is.
17:24
But like I was going to say, a lot of it is how actually.
17:27
The conversations are worse. They are through this we
17:31
actually have. To start a Patreon and if you
17:33
want to hear the worst one, kidding.
17:36
That is going to happen, you realize that, right?
17:39
I got it. That is going to happen, you
17:44
know, but anywho, you know, I've had my, my bouts of dealing
17:50
with, with people that have mental health illness.
17:54
I mean, I used to do that for a living.
17:57
I, I worked in mental health for a number of years.
18:00
I went to school for psychology with a lot of issues and I I
18:07
just, I saw the worst of the worst for a lot of people and I
18:09
hate that for him and I hate it for a lot of people.
18:11
He's probably sick and probably needs some some help, but you
18:15
know what? It's not your responsibility.
18:17
It's not. And like I said, you know, the
18:20
the dark side of going back and saying these nasty, horrible
18:23
things to me and then this Eric Fairchild wanted to set
18:27
something up with me. So that's how you're going to
18:29
get skinned alive. Thank you, thank you.
18:32
He doesn't realize. A FaceTime from you and it would
18:34
just be him wearing your skin or.
18:36
Something Buffalo Bill. Fuck me.
18:40
Jesus. Well, that.
18:41
Let's let's get back to what we were doing on this spot.
18:44
No, no, no. We're already in too deep.
18:46
But I will tell you this. I had another star stalker at
18:49
some point, Barbie. Oh, God.
18:50
But this was right before I got married.
18:52
And you know, the thing of it is, I was in my 20s and I tell
18:55
you this all the time when when you're in your 20s, you do
18:58
stupid things. Can't relate but.
19:01
I'm kidding. So I had this guy, and I met him
19:07
on AOL in the chat room. You know, this is when the
19:10
Internet came out before you were born.
19:12
And he ultimately hacked into an account, got my address and
19:19
information. And one day he calls me from my
19:23
landline or to my landline. And he had, you know, I had no
19:29
clue, but I didn't even give him my personal phone number.
19:31
Yeah. And he shows up and it's 9:00 at
19:35
night, you know, calls me. Oh, my God.
19:38
And the thing of it is he's like, hey, come outside.
19:42
And that's some. Horror movie stuff.
19:43
Well, you know, and at the time I lived in this townhouse, I was
19:46
by myself and everything else. And I thought, oh, why not?
19:50
I'm going to go outside with the strange man who's stalking me.
19:54
Yeah. And so I did, and then we went
19:56
to his work because he owned a business and it was dark and
20:00
scary and he could have fucking killed me, but instead I fucked
20:03
him on his desk and then he took me back home.
20:08
Mia, I'm. In too deep at this.
20:10
Point I literally stopped talking to a guy the other day
20:13
because he knew me, my fat name and I had never given him my fat
20:17
life. I was like you don't know me as
20:21
Barbie, you know me as my real name.
20:23
How the fuck do you know me as Barbie?
20:25
Literally. And that's not even stalking.
20:29
Yeah, I was very carefree and yeah, I fucked my stalking.
20:33
Inhibitions to the wind. Inhibitions all the way, but you
20:37
know, we're going to do the BDSM test on a whole other episode
20:40
we're going to. Have to do this right?
20:42
You're you're tired. I'm tired.
20:45
We need to stop for a second because we had to take a call
20:48
and it's raining. I'm in like PJ's and the couch
20:50
is, I'm on the couch with all of her dogs.
20:53
So it's warm. The lighting's low and she's
20:55
probably on the phone like 10 minutes and I'm I fell asleep.
20:59
So if my energy dropped, I took a nap.
21:03
Not going to lie to you guys. I just say your name twice.
21:06
Barbie, Barbie, I was ignoring how I wanted to sleep in.
21:10
Liar. But you know, I think, like I
21:17
said, I, I think you have your, your head on your shoulders
21:21
about everything. Like you're really smart about a
21:23
lot of things and a good head on your shoulders to.
21:29
Trying to make like good decisions, like like being young
21:32
and not knowing how to do it is I just, I try to like really
21:36
take my time with like decisions because I from what I've learned
21:40
from like friends and like peers and my parents and stuff, just
21:44
like watching people. Because I never necessarily had
21:47
anybody like tell me how to do things.
21:49
But like, yeah, I just, I noticed the big cause of a lot
21:53
of stuff is just rushing into it.
21:54
And just like, you know, I don't know how to explain it.
21:58
Just like going too quick, like growing up too fast or trying to
22:01
get through things. Because I knew kids that their
22:04
life goals, like, oh, I want to, I want to grow up, I want to get
22:06
married, I want to have kids. And they'll do it all really
22:09
quick. And then they're 26, you know,
22:11
divorced with three kids, you know, stuff like that, which
22:14
there's nothing wrong with that, but it's not the life I want to
22:16
live. I hopefully my goal is to only
22:19
get married once in my life. So true, so true.
22:26
You know, we'll see where the road takes you honestly.
22:28
We'll see, We'll see. I'm on a slow and steady path.
22:32
Sorry to anyone who's ever flirted with me.
22:35
I am so like, I'm so unflirty. It's so weird.
22:40
Like all the stuff I do, I'm not a, I'm not a good flirt.
22:43
Well, I'm going to tell you something.
22:45
We had a gentleman who came the other night to see me over the
22:51
weekend, actually, and he's such a sweet person.
22:56
He's into adult baby. Yeah, You know, And he told me
23:01
that he saw you and talked with you at, I believe, two parties
23:06
ago. I wasn't the last party, but two
23:07
parties ago. The.
23:09
Young One. Yes, yes, he's fucking adorable.
23:11
I just. I want to eat him up.
23:13
I love him, but he says, you know, I talked to Barbie.
23:17
He's like, I know that she's working the party.
23:20
I really like her. I don't want to appear to be
23:24
pushy or like an asshole. I try to gauge things.
23:28
Well, you know, but he admires you quite a bit.
23:33
He really likes you and I'm. Like a deer, if you move too
23:37
quick, I'll freak out. I'm not kidding.
23:43
But, you know, he said that he, he picks up on social cues and
23:46
you know, he, he just didn't want to make you feel awkward.
23:49
He said, you know, he's he's 24. He's a virgin.
23:53
Yeah. And I told him, I said I want to
23:55
get you laid. I lost my virginity late.
23:58
I lost it at I lost it late 2022 and my birthday is early 2023.
24:03
So like I lost it close to 23 years old.
24:06
It hasn't been long for me. But I mean, that's that's what
24:09
I'm saying. I'm a slow and steady person,
24:11
you know. Yeah, takes me a while to get to
24:13
things. OK, whatever happens, happens.
24:15
Right, we're going now. I was going to say you.
24:20
Would take the lost your virginity like at 20/21/21.
24:24
Yeah. So I mean, yeah.
24:25
Yeah, I was. I'll get there.
24:27
Give me what, 35 years? I'm kidding.
24:31
I'm kidding. I'm kidding.
24:32
You know my thing too. I I wanted to wait for love.
24:35
I really did and I didn't. Just love.
24:38
I waited for like, like safety almost just like I waited till I
24:45
found a guy that made me feel safe and respected and that I
24:48
felt like I could be a like could be a friend of mine.
24:51
And that's what happened. I'm still friends with him.
24:53
Like we never got together, but he was my lover for like a year
24:57
and a half and whenever we're still great friends, he's one of
25:00
my best friends. But like that's what I was
25:02
waiting for like because I was never a big stickler on marriage
25:04
or love. It was more of like security,
25:07
like I just want to make sure that who I'm sleeping with isn't
25:10
just wanting to take my V card and run.
25:12
Like I don't want it to be something like something he gets
25:14
off on or some like asshole who doesn't care about my pleasure.
25:17
I'd be interviewing the fuck out of these guys.
25:21
So, so I had one of my family members, they came to live with
25:26
me because you mentioned this and it's kind of like it
25:29
resonates with me, you know, about feeling special and that
25:32
kind of thing. Well, she was in a very strict
25:35
religious household. I mean, you can relate to this.
25:39
But she didn't lose her virginity until she was 25 years
25:42
old, almost almost 26. And when she came here, I was
25:46
like, look, you need to look for a partner that is just like you,
25:50
a geek, somebody who likes photography, someone who likes
25:54
to do, you know, nature walks. And you need to, if you're
25:58
looking for a partner, that's what you need to do.
26:00
And I said, but what happens is a lot of times we have a
26:03
tendency to marry either our mother or our father.
26:07
And so she started seeing this one guy she just met.
26:11
And I was like, don't waste your time with that.
26:14
The guy is, yeah, he's self-centered.
26:17
He focuses. On the biggest thing that puts
26:20
me off any guy, it's true, try to skip the fun part.
26:24
The fun part is the banter and getting to know each other and
26:27
building that. The fun part for me isn't just
26:30
fucking so like when guys like try to like jump are really, I'm
26:33
going to say anybody If even girls try to jump straight into
26:37
meeting me to like try to take me to the bedroom.
26:40
I don't know why it freaks me out.
26:41
I'm just like, because to me I'm like, you don't like me, you
26:45
just want to fuck and that's fine for some people.
26:47
I'm just not that kind of way really.
26:49
But I like I said, I I've had sex with like my friends because
26:53
I like at least being friends with somebody.
26:55
You know what I mean? Like I don't know how to explain
26:58
it. Look, some form of connection.
27:01
It doesn't have to be love, it doesn't have to be romance.
27:04
It just has to be like, not a stranger sometimes.
27:07
Well, it sounds like an emotional connection.
27:09
You need some time barring. Barring sexy guy that was, that
27:12
was out of character for me. Yeah, that was.
27:15
We were all properly shocked that happened.
27:17
Yes, I'm sure. Well, you know, ultimately so.
27:21
So this chick, you know, I set her up with somebody who was.
27:24
Yeah, who was great think. You've told me about this.
27:25
Before, Yeah, yeah. And so I set her up with
27:28
somebody and you know, she lost her virginity at Christmas.
27:33
Later you tried to set him up with me exactly.
27:37
And what exactly what we're talking about happened.
27:39
He wasn't rude at all or trying to like force me to do anything.
27:42
I'm not saying that but I get so spooked off so easily.
27:46
The second I picked up it was a setup I could not relax.
27:49
Like anxiety through the roof. Like if you're ever trying to
27:52
set me up with something you cannot tell me.
27:55
If I'm aware it's a setup, I'm going to lose it like I can't.
27:58
Function. God, I know you're terrible.
28:01
Crazy. Is that like you're saying
28:02
Someone Like You like with her? I.
28:05
Presented so insane while I was a virgin that people would not
28:09
believe me. I was, I would wear like full
28:12
latex open harnesses, like I had my nipples pierced, colorful
28:16
hair, like I looked like a dominatrix walking around.
28:20
And then like, you know, people would just start talking to me
28:22
and I'd be like, oh, I'm, I'm a virgin.
28:23
And they'd be like, no, the fuck you're not like you know how I
28:28
dress now. It's just sluttier then yes.
28:31
So. Holy fuck.
28:32
No, there was this. The top I lost my virginity in
28:35
is an open face leather corset that just all my boob is out,
28:39
like it's under and over boob. And I like wore it down.
28:43
Like I wore it downtown for something and then the guy was
28:45
like, do you want to come hang out?
28:46
I was like, sure. And it's like really funny that
28:49
I was like a virgin dressing like, Oh my God, that was a
28:52
proper virgin whore. It was weird.
28:54
You got that one skirt and God forbid you wear shorts or undies
28:58
or something that doesn't even look like that's my.
29:00
Wannies skirt. It's crazy I see that cheeks.
29:05
No, it's because I wear tall shoes.
29:08
Whatever you say to. Convince yourself I have now
29:11
adopted a pair of nice biker shorts that go right under my
29:15
butt cheek, so when I wear my skirt to public, my butt cheek
29:20
is not out unless the event calls for that.
29:24
All right, Because, you know, God forbid I was.
29:28
Dressing like that is a virgin. My mother hasn't seen you
29:31
dressed in some of the things you've dressed in, but God
29:34
forbid she'll say something about.
29:36
She's seen me. OK.
29:38
Because like when I when I'm doing stuff in the dungeon, I
29:41
always, if I if I run into her, I always say hi.
29:44
Oh, OK, well, she hadn't said anything, so it can't be that.
29:46
Bad. No, I'm not in lingerie, I'm in
29:48
a miniskirt. Well.
29:49
Clearly, clearly that's true. That's that is true.
29:52
Tight miniskirt. Yeah, that's true.
29:54
OK, All right. I know some some women who've
29:57
worked in the dungeon. She's like oh God, why does she
29:59
want to show her navel? Maybe that's why 'cause I don't
30:04
show my navel. No, she.
30:05
Has a thing with, you know, belly buttons.
30:06
It's like I have a little, I have like some cleavage going on
30:10
and then I usually have the whole leg, but I always have
30:13
like sleeves on and like my stomach's covered.
30:16
So maybe that's why. Maybe.
30:17
Maybe 'cause it's just like a mini dress, it's nothing.
30:19
And it's also never like bodycon.
30:21
It's always a little fit and flare.
30:23
Cute moment. That's true.
30:24
That's true. Or maybe a distractor with my
30:26
dazzling personality. Well, you do it up, bitch.
30:29
You do it up, girl. All right, Let's call it Barbie.
30:33
You ready? Yeah, all.
30:35
Right bitches, and may all your fantasies become.
30:40
Realities. So Barbie has something very
30:43
special she wants to tell everyone.
30:46
Yeah, it's. Super special.
30:48
Thank you everyone who listens and if you like the podcast you
30:51
better rate US five stars and leave a good review or I will
30:54
find you and I will get you, you freak.