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06 - Gulliver's Travels - Jonathan Swift · Classic Adventure Books - Daily

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Speaker 1: Chapter six of the Inhabitants of Lilliput, their learning, laws
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Speaker 1: and customs, the manner of educating their children, the author's
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Speaker 1: way of living in that country, His vindiction of a
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Speaker 1: great Lady. Although I intend to leave the description of
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Speaker 1: this empire to a particular treatise, yet in the meantime
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Speaker 1: I am content to gratify the curious reader with some
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Speaker 1: general ideas. As the common size of the natives is
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Speaker 1: somewhat under six inches high, so there is an exact
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Speaker 1: proportion in all other animals, as well as plants and trees.
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Speaker 1: For instance, the tallest horse and oxen are between four
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Speaker 1: and five inches in height, the sheep an inch and
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Speaker 1: a half. More or less, they geeze about the bigness
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Speaker 1: of a sparrow, And so the several gradations downwards till
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Speaker 1: you come to the smallest, which to my sight were
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Speaker 1: almost invisible. But nature has adapted the eyes of the
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Speaker 1: Lilliputians to all objects proper. For their view. They see
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Speaker 1: with great exactness, but at no great distance, and to
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Speaker 1: show the sharpness of their sight towards objects that are near.
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Speaker 1: I have been much pleased with observing a cook pulling
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Speaker 1: a lark, which was not so large as a common fly,
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Speaker 1: and a young girl threading an invisible needle with invisible silk.
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Speaker 1: Their tallest trees are about seven feet high, I mean
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Speaker 1: some of those in the Great Royal Park, the tops
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Speaker 1: whereof I could but just reach with my fist clenched.
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Speaker 1: The other vegetables are in the same proportion. But this
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Speaker 1: I leave to the reader's imagination. I shall say but
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Speaker 1: little at present of their learning, which for many ages
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Speaker 1: has flourished in all its branches among them. But their
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Speaker 1: manner of writing is very peculiar, being neither from the
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Speaker 1: left to the right like the Europeans, nor from the
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Speaker 1: right to the left like the Arabians, nor from up
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Speaker 1: to down like the Chinese, but a slant from one
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Speaker 1: corner of the paper to the other, like ladies in England.
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Speaker 1: They bury their dead with their heads directly downward, because
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Speaker 1: they hold an opinion that in eleven thousand moons they
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Speaker 1: are all to rise again, in which period the earth,
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Speaker 1: which they conceived be flat, will turn upside down, and
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Speaker 1: by this means they shall, at their resurrection be found
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Speaker 1: ready standing on their feet. The learned among them confess
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Speaker 1: the absurdity of this doctrine, but the practice still continues
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Speaker 1: in compliance to the vulgar. There are some laws and
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Speaker 1: customs in this empire very peculiar, and if they were
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Speaker 1: not so directly contrary to those of my own dear country,
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Speaker 1: I should be tempted to say a little in their justification.
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Speaker 1: It is only to be wished they were as well executed.
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Speaker 1: The first I shall mention relates to informers. All crimes
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Speaker 1: against the state are punished here with the utmost severity.
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Speaker 1: But if the person accused makes his innocent plainly to
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Speaker 1: appear upon his trial, the accuser is immediately put to
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Speaker 1: an ignominious death, and out of his goods or lands.
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Speaker 1: The innocent person is quadruplely recompensed for the loss of
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Speaker 1: his time, for the danger he underwent, for the hardship
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Speaker 1: of his imprisonment, and for all the charges he had
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Speaker 1: been at in making his defense. Or if that fund
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Speaker 1: be deficient, it is largely supplied by the crown. The
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Speaker 1: Emperor also confers on him some public mark of his favor,
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Speaker 1: and proclamation is made of his innocence through the whole city.
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Speaker 1: They look upon fraud as a greater crime than theft,
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Speaker 1: and therefore seldom fail to punish it with death. For
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Speaker 1: they allege that care and vigilance, with a very common understanding,
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Speaker 1: may preserve a man's goods from thieves, but honesty has
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Speaker 1: no defense against superior cunning. And since it is necessary
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Speaker 1: that there should be a perpetual intercourse of buying and
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Speaker 1: selling and dealing upon credit, where fraud is permitted and
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Speaker 1: connived at, or has no law to punish it, the
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Speaker 1: honest dealer is always undone, and the knave gets the advantage.
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Speaker 1: I remember when I was once interceding with the Emperor
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Speaker 1: for a criminal who had wronged his master of a
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Speaker 1: great sum of money, which he had received by order
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Speaker 1: and ran away with, and happening to tell his Majesty
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Speaker 1: by way of extenuation, that it was only a breach
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Speaker 1: of trust. The Emperor thought it monstrous in me to
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Speaker 1: offer as a defense the greatest aggravation of the crime,
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Speaker 1: And truly I had little to say in return, farther
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Speaker 1: than the common answer that different nations had different customs.
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Speaker 1: For I confess I was heartily ashamed. Although we usually
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Speaker 1: call reward and punishment the two hinges upon which all
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Speaker 1: government turns, yet I could never observe this maxim to
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Speaker 1: be put in practice by any nation except that of Lilliput.
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Speaker 1: Whoever can there bring sufficient proof that he has strictly
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Speaker 1: observed the laws of his country for seventy three moons,
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Speaker 1: has a claim to certain privileges according to his quality
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Speaker 1: or condition of life, with a proportional sum of money
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Speaker 1: out of a fund appropriated for that use. He likewise
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Speaker 1: acquires the title of snil pal or legal, which is
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Speaker 1: added to his no but does not descend to his posterity.
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Speaker 1: And these people thought it a prodigious defect of policy
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Speaker 1: among us when I told him that our laws were
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Speaker 1: enforced only by penalties, without any mention of reward. It
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Speaker 1: is upon this account that the image of justice in
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Speaker 1: their courts of judicature is formed with six eyes, two before,
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Speaker 1: as many behind and on each side, one to signify circumspection,
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Speaker 1: with a bag of gold open in her right hand,
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Speaker 1: and a sword sheathed in her left, to show she
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Speaker 1: is more disposed to reward them to punish. In choosing
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Speaker 1: persons for all employments, they have more regard to good
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Speaker 1: morals and to great abilities, For since government is necessary
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Speaker 1: to mankind, they believe that the common size of human
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Speaker 1: understanding is fitted to some station or other, and that
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Speaker 1: Providence never intended to make the management of public affairs
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Speaker 1: and mystery to be comprehended only by a few persons
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Speaker 1: of sublime genius, which there are, seldom are three born
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Speaker 1: in an age. But they suppose truth, justice, temperance, and
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Speaker 1: the like to be in every man's power, the practice
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Speaker 1: of which virtues, assisted by experience in a good intention,
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Speaker 1: would qualify any man for the service of his country,
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Speaker 1: except where a course of study is required. But they
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Speaker 1: thought the want of moral virtues was so far from
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Speaker 1: being supplied by superior endowments of the mind, that employments
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Speaker 1: could never be put into such dangerous hands as those
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Speaker 1: of persons so qualified, and at least that the mistakes
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Speaker 1: committed by ignorance in a virtuous disposition would never be
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Speaker 1: of such fatal consequence to the public weal as the
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Speaker 1: practices of a man whose inclinations led him to be corrupt,
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Speaker 1: and who had great abilities to manage to multiply and
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Speaker 1: defend his corruptions. In like manner, the disbelief of a
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Speaker 1: divine providence renders a man incapable of holding any public station.
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Speaker 1: For since kings avow themselves to be the deputies of providence.
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Speaker 1: The Liliputians that nothing can be more absurd than for
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Speaker 1: a prince to employ such men as disown their authority
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Speaker 1: under which he acts. In relating these in the following laws,
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Speaker 1: I would only be understood to mean the original institutions,
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Speaker 1: and not the most scandalous corruptions into which these people
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Speaker 1: are fallen by the degenerate nature of man. For as
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Speaker 1: to that infamous practice of acquiring great employments by dancing
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Speaker 1: on the ropes or badges of favor and distinction, by
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Speaker 1: leaping over sticks and creeping under them, the reader is
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Speaker 1: to observe that they were first introduced by the grandfather
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Speaker 1: of the emperor now reigning, and grew to the present
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Speaker 1: height by the gradual inquiries of party and faction. Ingratitude
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Speaker 1: is among them a capital crime, as we read it
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Speaker 1: to have been in some other countries. For they reason
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Speaker 1: thus that whoever makes ill returns to his benefactor must
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Speaker 1: needs be a common enemy to the rest of mankind,
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Speaker 1: from whom he has received no obligation, and therefore such
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Speaker 1: a man is not fit to live. Their notions relating
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Speaker 1: to the duties of parents and children differ extremely from ours,
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Speaker 1: For since the conjunction of male and female is founded
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Speaker 1: upon the great law of nature. In order to propagate
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Speaker 1: and continue the species, the Liliputians will needs have it
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Speaker 1: that men and women are joined together like other animals,
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Speaker 1: by the motives of concupiscence, and that their tenderness towards
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Speaker 1: their young proceeds from the like nature principle, for which
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Speaker 1: reason they will never allow that a child is under
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Speaker 1: any obligation to his father for begetting him, or to
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Speaker 1: his mother for bringing him into the world, which, considering
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Speaker 1: that the miseries of human life, was neither a benefit
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Speaker 1: in himself, nor intended so by his parents, whose thoughts
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Speaker 1: in their love encounters were otherwise employed. Upon these and
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Speaker 1: the like reasonings, their opinion is that parents are the
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Speaker 1: last of all others to be trusted with the education
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Speaker 1: of their own children, and therefore they have in every
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Speaker 1: town public nurseries, where all parents, except cottagers and labourers,
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Speaker 1: are obliged to send their infants of both sexes, to
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Speaker 1: be reared and educated when they come to the age
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Speaker 1: of twenty moons, at which time they are supposed to
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Speaker 1: have some rudiments of docility. These schools are of several
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Speaker 1: kinds suited to different qualities and both sexes. They have
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Speaker 1: certain professors well skilled in preparing children for such a
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Speaker 1: condition of life as befits the rank of their parents
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Speaker 1: and their own capacities, as well as inclinations. I shall
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Speaker 1: first say something of the male nurseries, and then of
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Speaker 1: the female. The nurseries for males of noble or eminent
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Speaker 1: birth are provided with grave and learned professors and their
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Speaker 1: several deputies. The clothes and food of the children are
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Speaker 1: plain and simple. They are bred up in the principles
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Speaker 1: of honour, justice, courage, modesty, clemency, religion, and love of
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Speaker 1: their country. They are always employed in some business, except
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Speaker 1: in the times of eating and sleeping, which are very short,
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Speaker 1: and two hours for diversion consisting of bodily exercises. They
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Speaker 1: are dressed by men till four years of age, and
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Speaker 1: then are obliged to dress themselves, although their quality be
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Speaker 1: ever so great, and the woman attendant, who are age
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Speaker 1: proportionally two hours at fifty, perform only the most menial offices.
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Speaker 1: They are never suffered to converse with servants, but go
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Speaker 1: together in smaller or greater numbers to take their diversions,
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Speaker 1: and always in the presence of a professor or one
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Speaker 1: of his deputies, whereby they avoid these early bad impressions
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Speaker 1: of folly and vice to which our children are subject.
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Speaker 1: Their parents are suffered to see them only twice a year.
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Speaker 1: The visit is to last but an hour. They are
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Speaker 1: allowed to kiss the child at meeting and parting, but
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Speaker 1: a professor, who always stands by on those occasions will
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Speaker 1: not suffer them to whisper, or use any fondling expressions,
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Speaker 1: or bring any presence of toys, sweetmeats and alike. The
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Speaker 1: pension from each family for the education and entertainment of
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Speaker 1: a child, upon faire failure of due payment is levied
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Speaker 1: by the Emperor's officers. The nurseries for children of ordinary gentlemen, merchants, traders,
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Speaker 1: and handicraft are managed proportionally after the same manner. Only
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Speaker 1: those designed for trades are put out apprentices at eleven
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Speaker 1: years old, whereas those of persons of quality continue in
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Speaker 1: their exercises till fifteen, which answers to twenty one with us,
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Speaker 1: but the confinement is gradually lessened for the last three years.
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Speaker 1: In the female nurseries, the young girl's equality are educated
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Speaker 1: much like the males only they are dressed by orderly
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Speaker 1: servants of their own sex, but always in the presence
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Speaker 1: of a professor or deputy, till they come to dress themselves,
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Speaker 1: which is at five years old. And if it be
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Speaker 1: found that the nurses ever presumed to entertain the girls
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Speaker 1: with frightful or foolish stories or the common follies practiced
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Speaker 1: by chambermaids among us, they are publicly whipped thrice about
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Speaker 1: the city, imprisoned for a year, and banished for life
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Speaker 1: to the most desolate part of the country. Thus the
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Speaker 1: young ladies are as much ashamed of being cowards and
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Speaker 1: fools as the men, and despise all personal ornaments beyond
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Speaker 1: decency and cleanliness. Neither did I perceive any difference in
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Speaker 1: their education made by their difference of sex, only that
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Speaker 1: the exercises of the females were not altogether so robust,
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Speaker 1: and that some rules were given them relating to domestic life,
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Speaker 1: and a smaller compass of learning was enjoined them for
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Speaker 1: their maximies that among peoples of quality, a wife should
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Speaker 1: always be a reasonable and agreeable companion, because she cannot
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Speaker 1: always be young. When the girls are twelve years old,
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Speaker 1: which among them is the marriageable age, Their parents or
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Speaker 1: guardians take them home with great expressions of gratitude to
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Speaker 1: the professors, and seldom without tears of the young lady
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Speaker 1: and her companions. In the nurseries of females of the
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Speaker 1: meaner sort, the children are instructed in all kinds of
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Speaker 1: works proper for their sex and their several degrees. Those
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Speaker 1: intended for apprentices are dismissed at seven years old, the
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Speaker 1: rest are kept till eleven. The meaner families who have
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Speaker 1: children at these nurseries are obliged, besides their annual pension,
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Speaker 1: which is as low as possible, to return to the
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Speaker 1: steward of the nursery, a small monthly share of their
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Speaker 1: gettings to be a portioned for the child. And therefore
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Speaker 1: all parents are limited in their expenses by the law.
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Speaker 1: For the Liliputians think nothing could be more unjust than
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Speaker 1: for people, in subservance to their own appetites to bring
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Speaker 1: children into the world and leave the burden of supporting
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Speaker 1: them on the public. As to persons of quality, they
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Speaker 1: give security to appropriate a certain sum for each child
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Speaker 1: suitable to their condition, and these funds are always managed
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Speaker 1: with good husbandry, and the most exact justice. The cottages
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Speaker 1: and laborers keep their children at home, their business being
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Speaker 1: only to till and cultivate the earth, and therefore their
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Speaker 1: education is of little consequence to the public. But the
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Speaker 1: old and diseased among them are supported by hospitals. For
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Speaker 1: begging is a trade unknown in this empire, and here
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Speaker 1: it may perhaps divert the curious reader to give some
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Speaker 1: account of my domestics and my manner of living in
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Speaker 1: this country. During a residence of nine months and thirteen days,
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Speaker 1: having a head mechanically turned, and being likewise forced by necessity,
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Speaker 1: I had made for myself a table and chair convenient
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Speaker 1: enough out of the largest trees in the royal park.
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Speaker 1: Two hundred seamstresses were employed to make me shirts and
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Speaker 1: linen for my bed and table, all of the strongest
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Speaker 1: and coarsest kind they could get, which, however, they were
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Speaker 1: forced to quilt together in several folds, for the thickest
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Speaker 1: was some degrees finer than lawn. Their linen is usually
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Speaker 1: three inches wide and three feet make apiece. The seamstresses
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Speaker 1: took my measure as I lay on the ground, one
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Speaker 1: standing at my neck and another at my mid leg.
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Speaker 1: With a strong cord extended that each held by their
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Speaker 1: while a third measured the length of the cord with
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Speaker 1: a rule of an inch long. Then they measured my
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Speaker 1: right thumb, and desired no more, for by a mathematical
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Speaker 1: computation that twice round the thumb is once round the wrist,
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Speaker 1: and so on to the neck and the waist. And
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Speaker 1: by the help of my old shirt, which I displayed
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Speaker 1: on the ground before them for a pattern, they fitted
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Speaker 1: me exactly. Three hundred tailors were employed in the same
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Speaker 1: manner to make me clothes. But they had another contrivance
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Speaker 1: for taking my measure. I kneeled down, and they raised
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Speaker 1: a ladder from the ground to my neck. Upon this ladder,
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Speaker 1: one of them mounted and let fall a plumb line
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Speaker 1: from my collar to the floor, which just answered the
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Speaker 1: length of my coat, but my waist and arms I
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Speaker 1: measured myself when my clothes were finished, which was done
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Speaker 1: in my house, for the largest of theirs would not
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Speaker 1: have been able to hold them. They looked like the
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Speaker 1: patchwork made by the ladies in England, only that mine
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Speaker 1: were all of a color. I had three hundred cooks
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Speaker 1: to dress my victuals in little convenient huts built about
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Speaker 1: my house where they and their families lived, and prepared
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Speaker 1: me two dishes apiece. I took up twenty waiters in
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Speaker 1: my hand and placed them on the table, a hundred
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Speaker 1: more attendant below on the ground, some with dishes of meat,
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Speaker 1: and some with barrels of wine and other liqueurs slung
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Speaker 1: on their shoulders, all which the waiters above drew up
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Speaker 1: as I wanted, in a very ingenious manner, by certain cords,
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Speaker 1: as we draw the bucket upper well. In Europe, A
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Speaker 1: dish of their meat was a good mouthful, and a
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Speaker 1: barrel of their liqueur a reasonable draft. Their mutton yielded
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Speaker 1: to ours, but their beef is excellent. I have had
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Speaker 1: a surloin so large that I have been forced to
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Speaker 1: make three bites of it, but this is rare. My
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Speaker 1: servants were astonished to see me eat it, bones and all.
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Speaker 1: As in our country we do the leg of a lark.
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Speaker 1: Their geese and turkeys I usually ate at a mouthful,
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Speaker 1: and I confess they far exceeded hours of their smaller fowl.
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Speaker 1: I could take up twenty or thirty at the end
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Speaker 1: of my knife. One day, his Imperial Majesty, being informed
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Speaker 1: of my way of living, desired that himself and his
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Speaker 1: royal consort, with the young princes of the blood of
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Speaker 1: both sexes, might have the happiness, as he was pleased
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Speaker 1: to call it, of dining with me. They came accordingly,
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Speaker 1: and I placed them in chairs of state upon my table,
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Speaker 1: just over against me, with their guards about them. Filnap,
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Speaker 1: the Lord High Treasurer, attended there likewise, with his white staff,
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Speaker 1: and I observed he often looked on me with a
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Speaker 1: sour countenance, which I would not seem to regard, but
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Speaker 1: ate more than usual in honor to my dear country,
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Speaker 1: as well as to fill the court with admiration. I
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Speaker 1: have some private reasons to believe that this visit from
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Speaker 1: his Majesty gave Filmnap an opportunity of doing the ill
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Speaker 1: offices to his master. That minister had always been my
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Speaker 1: secret enemy. Though he outwardly caressed me more than was
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Speaker 1: usual to the moroseness of his nature, he represented to
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Speaker 1: the Emperor the low condition of his treasury, that he
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Speaker 1: was forced to make up money at a great discount,
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Speaker 1: that exchequer bills would not circulate under nine percent below par.
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Speaker 1: That I had cost his Majesty above a million and
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Speaker 1: a half of sprugues their great is gold coin, about
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Speaker 1: the bigness of a spangle, and upon the whole that
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Speaker 1: it would be advisable in the Emperor to take the
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Speaker 1: first fair occasion of dismissing me. I am here obliged
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Speaker 1: to vindicate the reputation of an excellent lady who was
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Speaker 1: an innocent sufferer. Upon my account, the Treasurer took a
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Speaker 1: fancy to be jealous of his wife from the malice
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Speaker 1: of some evil tongues, who informed him that her Grace
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Speaker 1: had taken a violent affection for my person, and the
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Speaker 1: court scandal ran for some time that she was once
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Speaker 1: come privately to my lodging. This I solemnly declared to
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Speaker 1: be a most infamous falsehood, without any grounds further than
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Speaker 1: that her Grace was pleased to treat me with all
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Speaker 1: innocent marks of freedom and friendship I own. She came
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Speaker 1: often to my house, but always publicly, not ever without
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Speaker 1: three more in the coach, who were usually her sister
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Speaker 1: and young daughter, and some particular acquaintance. But this was
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Speaker 1: common to many other ladies of the court, and I
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Speaker 1: still appealed to my servants round whether they at any
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Speaker 1: time saw a coach at my door without knowing what
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Speaker 1: persons were in it. On those occasions when a servant
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Speaker 1: had given me my notice, my custom was to go
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Speaker 1: immediately to the door, and, after paying my respects, to
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Speaker 1: take up the coach and two horses very carefully in
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Speaker 1: my hands. For if there were six horses the POSTILI
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Speaker 1: had always unharnessed four and placed them on a table
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Speaker 1: where I had fixed a movable rim quite round of
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Speaker 1: five inches high, to prevent accidents. And I often have
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Speaker 1: four coaches and horses at once on my table, full
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Speaker 1: of company, while I sat in my chair, leaning my
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Speaker 1: face towards them. When I was engaged with one, set
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Speaker 1: the coach more gently drive the others round my table.
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Speaker 1: I have passed many afternoon very agreeably in these conversations.
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Speaker 1: But I defy the Treasurer or his two informers. I
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Speaker 1: will name them and let them make the best of it.
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Speaker 1: Clusterrel and drunlow to prove that any person ever came
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Speaker 1: to me incognito except the Secretary Valdressel, who was sent
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Speaker 1: by express command of his Imperial Majesty. As I had
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Speaker 1: before related, I should not have dwelt so long upon
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Speaker 1: this particular if it had not been a point wherein
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Speaker 1: the reputation of a great lady is so nearly concerned
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Speaker 1: to say nothing of my own, though I then had
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Speaker 1: the honor to be an ardec, which the treasure himself
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Speaker 1: is not. For all the world knows that he is
20:38
Speaker 1: only a glum glum, a title inferior by one degree,
20:42
Speaker 1: as that of a marquis is to a duke in England.
20:44
Speaker 1: Yet I allow he preceded me in right of his post.
20:48
Speaker 1: These false informations, which I afterwards came to the knowledge
20:51
Speaker 1: of by an accident not proper to mention, made the
20:54
Speaker 1: Treasurer show his lady for some time an ill countenance,
20:58
Speaker 1: and me are worse. And although he was at last
21:01
Speaker 1: undeceived and reconciled to her, yet I lost all credit
21:05
Speaker 1: with him, and found my interest declined very fast with
21:08
Speaker 1: the Emperor himself, who was indeed too much governed by
21:11
Speaker 1: that favorite end of Chapter six, Part one,