Latest / The Kevin Stone Podcast / Episode #34 "Bo Duke in Russellville, Arkansas"

Transcript

Episode #34 "Bo Duke in Russellville, Arkansas" · The Kevin Stone Podcast

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Ladies and gentlemen, we've discussed some serious issues on this podcast.
• 0:04
  Speaker 1: We've talked about government. We've talked about water problems. We've
• 0:07
  Speaker 1: talked about things happening right here in our community. We've
• 0:10
  Speaker 1: talked about Washington. And occasionally, I've attempted actual research. Which
• 0:15
  Speaker 1: is dangerous because, as we've already established, I did not
• 0:19
  Speaker 1: go to Harvard. But today, today we have a genuine crisis.
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  Speaker 1: John Snyder is coming to Russellville, Arkansas. Bo Duke. Bo
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  Speaker 1: Duke is coming to my hometown. And where am I
• 0:28
  Speaker 1: going to be?
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  Speaker 2: At work.
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  Speaker 1: I'd like everybody to observe a brief moment of silence
• 0:32
  Speaker 1: because that, ladies and gentlemen, is a crisis. Welcome to
• 0:36
  Speaker 1: the Kevin Stone Podcast.
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  Speaker 2: The content of this podcast is for entertainment purposes only.
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  Speaker 2: Mainly the entertainment of the podcast creator. If at any
• 0:41
  Speaker 2: time you find any of this to be offensive, you
• 0:42
  Speaker 2: should immediately rewind the program and start it from the beginning.
• 0:44
  Speaker 2: The sarcasm provided in this program is so accurate, it
• 0:46
  Speaker 2: is illegal in 14 states. You are listening to the
• 0:54
  Speaker 2: Kevin Stone Podcast, broadcasting to you from an undisclosed location.
• 0:57
  Speaker 2: Customized listening.
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  Speaker 1: Let's begin by cleaning those ears. Who am I? I'm
• 1:02
  Speaker 1: a nobody. I just happen to have a camera and
• 1:04
  Speaker 1: a microphone and an internet connection, which makes me a superstar.
• 1:12
  Speaker 1: I have beef enchiladas in the oven. What? Yes. And
• 1:18
  Speaker 1: you made them, or are they frozen? Well, they won't
• 1:21
  Speaker 1: be frozen in about 35 minutes. Hey, I made it
• 1:27
  Speaker 1: at the house, so it's homemade. The Polk County Fair
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  Speaker 1: is going on this week in Russellville, Arkansas. And Saturday night,
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  Speaker 1: September 19th, John Snyder is scheduled to perform at the
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  Speaker 1: Polk County Fair. John Snyder, Bo Duke. And according to
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  Speaker 1: the schedule, Snyder performs Saturday night at 8 p.m. Now,
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  Speaker 1: for some of the younger people listening... I realize I
• 1:50
  Speaker 1: probably need to explain why a grown man is this
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  Speaker 1: emotionally distraught over another grown man coming to Russellville. So
• 1:57
  Speaker 1: pull up a chair. Kevin is about to tell you
• 1:59
  Speaker 1: about a magical time called the 1980s. If you grew
• 2:03
  Speaker 1: up when I did, you know exactly what I'm talking about.
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  Speaker 1: The Dukes of Hazzard. Bo Duke, Luke Duke, Daisy Duke,
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  Speaker 1: Uncle Jesse, Boss Hogg, Sheriff Roscoe P. Coltrane, and of course,
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  Speaker 1: the General Lee. That orange Dodge Charger was probably one
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  Speaker 1: of the most recognizable cars on television, and the Dukes
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  Speaker 1: didn't use the doors. Why? I don't know. I didn't
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  Speaker 1: ask questions. Bo Duke would run toward that car, slide
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  Speaker 1: across the hood, and dive through the window and take off.
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  Speaker 1: And every kid watching thought, yep, that's how you get
• 2:32
  Speaker 1: into a car. Try that today. Go out to the
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  Speaker 1: Walmart parking lot and dive through the window of your vehicle.
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  Speaker 1: You're not Bo Duke. You're probably going to the emergency room.
• 2:41
  Speaker 1: And somebody is definitely going to put it on TikTok.
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  Speaker 1: This is the part younger listeners may not understand. There
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  Speaker 1: was no Netflix. There was no YouTube. There was no streaming.
• 2:50
  Speaker 1: There wasn't a button that said, watch every episode right now. Nope.
• 2:54
  Speaker 1: You had television networks. And if the antenna wasn't pointed correctly,
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  Speaker 1: you didn't even have all of them. Sometimes somebody had
• 3:00
  Speaker 1: to go outside and turn the antenna. And somebody inside
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  Speaker 1: would holler, right there, stop! Technology, ladies and gentlemen. That's
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  Speaker 1: 1980s technology. And when your show came on, you watched it.
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  Speaker 1: Because if you missed it, there wasn't necessarily another opportunity
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  Speaker 1: 15 minutes later. And the Dukes of Hazzard was event televisions.
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  Speaker 1: Cars jumped things. Things exploded. Roscoe chased the Duke boys.
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  Speaker 1: Boss Hogg always had a scheme. The General Lee probably
• 3:26
  Speaker 1: spent more time airborne than some commercial aircraft. And somehow,
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  Speaker 1: everything was usually okay by the end. And he couldn't
• 3:33
  Speaker 1: have the Dukes of Hazzards without that theme. Waylon Jennings
• 3:36
  Speaker 1: wrote and performed Good Old Boys. Waylon was also the narrator,
• 3:39
  Speaker 1: the balladeer on the television series. And I'd love to
• 3:43
  Speaker 1: play that guitar right here. I mean, wouldn't that be perfect?
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  Speaker 1: But Charlie, the podcast chief of staff, research department, and
• 3:49
  Speaker 1: apparently now intellectual property compliance officer, has informed me that
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  Speaker 1: copyright attorneys generally expect to be paid. So, we're not
• 3:58
  Speaker 1: doing it. We're still working with approximately three listeners. Here's
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  Speaker 1: something that's easy to forget. John Snyder didn't disappear when
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  Speaker 1: he climbed out of the General League. He also had
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  Speaker 1: a legitimate country music career. He had major country hits
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  Speaker 1: during the 1980s, including number one records. And according to
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  Speaker 1: a recent interview with River Valley Radio, Snyder crossed paths
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  Speaker 1: with some of the absolute giants of country music. Johnny Cash,
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  Speaker 1: Waylon Jennings, Loretta Lynn. Conway Twitty. Think about those names.
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  Speaker 1: Those aren't just country singers. That's a pretty significant chunk
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  Speaker 1: of American country music history. So Saturday night isn't simply, hey,
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  Speaker 1: Bo Duke is here. You've got somebody who has been
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  Speaker 1: a part of American television and country music for decades.
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  Speaker 1: He's coming to Russellville, my hometown, Pope County, Arkansas. And
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  Speaker 1: according to local reporting, Saturday afternoon, he's scheduled to sign
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  Speaker 1: autographs from 1 until 4 p.m. at the Hughes Community Center.
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  Speaker 1: Then Saturday evening, Whiskey Halo is scheduled for 7 p.m.,
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  Speaker 1: followed by John Snyder at 8. Sounds fantastic. You know
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  Speaker 1: where Kevin Stone is scheduled to appear Saturday? Work. I
• 5:02
  Speaker 1: don't remember purchasing tickets to that particular event. Apparently admission
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  Speaker 1: was mandatory. This is one of those moments when you
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  Speaker 1: look at your schedule and think, seriously? You couldn't have
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  Speaker 1: brought Bo Duke to Russellville on one of my days off?
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  Speaker 1: Forty-something years I've been waiting for this. And somebody somewhere
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  Speaker 1: looked at the calendar and said, you know what would
• 5:20
  Speaker 1: be funny? Let's schedule this event when Kevin has to work.
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  Speaker 1: Now that's a conspiracy theory. I have absolutely no evidence
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  Speaker 1: of it, but I like it. And apparently the General
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  Speaker 1: Lee is part of the attraction. Now we're just being cruel.
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  Speaker 1: Because seeing John Snyder would be cool. Seeing the General
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  Speaker 1: Lee would be cool. Seeing both of them? For somebody
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  Speaker 1: who grew up watching the Dukes of Hazzard, that's nostalgia overload.
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  Speaker 1: There are certain objects from television and movies that immediately
• 5:44
  Speaker 1: take you back to being a kid. The Batmobile. Kit
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  Speaker 1: from Knight Rider. The DeLorean from Back to the Future.
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  Speaker 1: And for a whole generation, that orange 1969 Dodge Charger.
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  Speaker 1: You don't have to explain it. You see it and
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  Speaker 1: immediately know what it represents. And here's where this becomes
• 6:00
  Speaker 1: something more than Kevin whining because he has to work Saturday,
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  Speaker 1: although I'm still going to whine. There's something good about
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  Speaker 1: occasionally remembering the things that made you happy when you
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  Speaker 1: were a kid. Not because everything was perfect back then.
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  Speaker 1: It wasn't. The world had problems. Families had problems. We
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  Speaker 1: had problems. But sometimes a television show was just fun.
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  Speaker 1: Nobody needed a political analysis afterward. Nobody went on social
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  Speaker 1: media and fought with strangers for six hours about what
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  Speaker 1: Bo Duke really meant when he jumped the creek. You
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  Speaker 1: watched the show, you laughed. You watched the cars jump.
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  Speaker 1: And then you went outside and tried something stupid on
• 6:35
  Speaker 1: your bicycle. That was social media. Hey y'all, watch this!
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  Speaker 1: Except only four people saw it. And fortunately, there was
• 6:42
  Speaker 1: no permanent digital record when you crashed. But there was
• 6:45
  Speaker 1: something John Snyder said recently that I really liked. River
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  Speaker 1: Valley Radio asked him what Uncle Jesse might tell America today.
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  Speaker 1: Snyder's answer was basically very simple. Love one another. And
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  Speaker 1: I think there's something worth hearing in that. Because Uncle
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  Speaker 1: Jesse represented something in that show. Family matters. You looked
• 7:02
  Speaker 1: out for each other. You might disagree. You might screw
• 7:05
  Speaker 1: things up. You might find yourself being chased by Roscoe P. Coltrane.
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  Speaker 1: But when everything was said and done, you came home.
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  Speaker 1: And you took care of your people. Maybe that's one
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  Speaker 1: piece of the 80s worth carrying forward. We don't need
• 7:17
  Speaker 1: to recreate 1980. But maybe we could use a little
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  Speaker 1: more neighborliness. A little more family. A little more humor.
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  Speaker 1: And occasionally, a ridiculous orange Dodge Charger flying through the air. Now,
• 7:27
  Speaker 1: according to the local interview, John Snyder apparently has another
• 7:31
  Speaker 1: important objective while visiting the Pope County Fair. That man
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  Speaker 1: wants a corndog. Bo Duke wants a county fair corndog. Finally.
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  Speaker 1: Something about this story I can completely understand. Forget fame.
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  Speaker 1: Forget television. Forget country music. Sometimes a man just wants
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  Speaker 1: a corndog. And I hope he gets a good one.
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  Speaker 1: Because if Bo Duke comes all the way to Pope County, Arkansas,
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  Speaker 1: and somebody gives that man a lousy corndog, we're going
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  Speaker 1: to have to do an investigation. Charlie will open a file.
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  Speaker 1: There may be hearings. I might even call City Hall.
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  Speaker 1: So if you're heading to the Pope County Fair Saturday,
• 8:02
  Speaker 1: enjoy it. John Snyder is scheduled to perform at 8 p.m.
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  Speaker 1: Take the kids. Take the grandkids. And if you're an
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  Speaker 1: 80s kid like me, enjoy that little trip down memory lane.
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  Speaker 1: And if you happen to see Bo Duke in the
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  Speaker 1: General League, think about Kevins. because I'll be at work.
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  Speaker 1: I'm fine. Really? No, I'm fine. This is worse than
• 8:19
  Speaker 1: the Ozark water crisis. Okay, maybe not. But emotionally, we're
• 8:23
  Speaker 1: getting close. Before I go, the Kevin Stone podcast has
• 8:26
  Speaker 1: apparently gone big time. You can now find the show
• 8:28
  Speaker 1: on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Spreaker, Amazon Music, and iHeartRadio. That's right.
• 8:34
  Speaker 1: All three of my listeners now have multiple options. And
• 8:37
  Speaker 1: if each one of those listeners brings just one friend,
• 8:40
  Speaker 1: that's six listeners. Ladies and gentlemen, that's 100% growth. Joe
• 8:43
  Speaker 1: Rogan better start checking the rearview mirror. We're coming very,
• 8:46
  Speaker 1: very slowly. Thanks for hanging out with me. I'm Kevin Stone.
• 8:50
  Speaker 1: This is the Kevin Stone Podcast. Take care of your family.
• 8:53
  Speaker 1: Be good to your neighbors. Find something to laugh about.
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  Speaker 1: And if you see Bo Duke in Russellville Saturday, tell
• 8:58
  Speaker 1: him Kevin said hello. And tell him I had to work.
• 9:01
  Speaker 1: Thank you.