Latest / Impact Ready / 171. Higher Integrity (Do What You Say You'll Do)
Transcript
- 0:02Welcome to Impact Ready, a show dedicated to helping you elevate
- 0:06your impact in the world. I'm Steph Safra, your host.
- 0:09Let's explore the power of showing up with intention and
- 0:12energy each day. This is for those who seek to
- 0:15make life truly meaningful. Get ready for impact.
- 0:22Hi team, welcome to the show. Happy New Year and I, I hope
- 0:25this week's been restful for you and you're ready to jump into
- 0:28new energy, new possibility in 2026.
- 0:32I'm very excited about it. I hope you are too.
- 0:35In this episode today, I want to talk about something that you've
- 0:39heard about. We're going to talk about it
- 0:40differently today, Integrity. We're going to talk about
- 0:44integrity not in the way that you've known it.
- 0:46I want to talk about it in a different way.
- 0:49Oftentimes when people hear that word integrity, they think about
- 0:52it in terms of morality. They think about it in terms of
- 0:55ethics, what's right, what's wrong.
- 0:57I'm a person of integrity, and that is one way to think about
- 1:01it. But we use the word integrity in
- 1:04another way also. We say, does that car have
- 1:06integrity? Does that bridge have integrity?
- 1:09When we're describing something in its ability to do what it's
- 1:12meant to do, we say, OK, does it have structural integrity?
- 1:16Can that bridge hold up the cars that are crossing over it?
- 1:20And we're going to talk about integrity in this way today.
- 1:23If I'm thinking about my sense of integrity, I'm really asking
- 1:27the question, do I have the ability to do things that I say
- 1:32I'm going to do? The reason I want to talk about
- 1:35this today is because it's the new year and so many people are
- 1:39setting intentions or goals or setting a theme for the year, as
- 1:43Andrew Huberman posted on his account.
- 1:46And all of that is awesome. Frankly.
- 1:48I love all that shit. It gets me really fired up.
- 1:51I love thinking about new energy and New year.
- 1:54I love setting goals. But the universal joke of New
- 1:59Year's resolutions is that they're not made to last.
- 2:03People typically give up on their resolutions within the
- 2:06first month of the year. I mean, even just this morning,
- 2:08my wife and I went to the gym like we always do, and it's
- 2:11packed and we looked at each other and we're like January
- 2:16newbies. They're coming to the gym and I
- 2:18hope they stay. We're both sitting there
- 2:20thinking, we hope they stay because we know that they're
- 2:24there for a reason, but they so often don't.
- 2:27And that's, that's the cliche of resolutions.
- 2:30When I think about that, I cringe.
- 2:33Not even just because they're giving up on themselves and the
- 2:36goal that they said, but because the goal was born out of a
- 2:39desire. People have desires for their
- 2:41life team. That's why they set intentions
- 2:45and goals. They want to get healthier, they
- 2:47want to earn more money, they want to have better
- 2:48relationships, they want to have a more fulfilled career,
- 2:51whatever it is. And so these resolutions or
- 2:54goals are attempts to get closer to those dreams.
- 2:57And when I see people let go of that, give up on the resolutions
- 3:01before January even ends, I think to myself, God, they're
- 3:05not getting what they really want.
- 3:08If you talk to any coach, they'll tell you that all their
- 3:11clients want to be able to be more productive in less time.
- 3:16That's really common. It's obvious that's what high
- 3:18performers do. They push themselves to get more
- 3:21done faster. But when you add coaching into
- 3:25the mix, you're working with coach.
- 3:27And so that coach is often asking the client to think a
- 3:30little differently. And one of the things we want
- 3:32people to think about is, well, how can I get more done in less
- 3:35time? Sure, but with more
- 3:37satisfaction, because that's really the goal also is to have
- 3:41a fulfilled, meaningful life. That's what it's all about.
- 3:44Nobody wants to be a burned out shell of themselves just to
- 3:47accomplish more in less time. And that's why we talk about
- 3:52this. This is why we talk about
- 3:54integrity and why we talk about through the lens of following
- 3:58through on the things that we say that we're going to do.
- 4:02The way to get more done in less time with more satisfaction is
- 4:07very straightforward. It's to upgrade your integrity.
- 4:12Jason Jaggart talks about this in his book.
- 4:15It's called Beyond High Performance.
- 4:17And remember, when we're talking about integrity, we're not
- 4:20talking about morality. That's a different way of
- 4:22looking at it. It's not about good versus bad
- 4:24or right versus wrong. It's about workability or
- 4:28functionality. And it begs the question, does
- 4:31my life work for me? Do these systems that I have set
- 4:35up in my life work for me? And if we go a little deeper,
- 4:38what we can recognize is that the systems we set up in our
- 4:41life, they only work when you work them.
- 4:45If you have a goal of getting healthier and you set up a
- 4:47system to go to the gym four times a week and you're waking
- 4:51up at 6:30 AM so that you can get to the gym at 7 and do a 45
- 4:55minute workout, but you've slept in for the last 10 days, that's
- 5:00a system that does not work. And even if we have great
- 5:03intentions, when we have low integrity, things will crumble
- 5:07underneath us because we aren't doing the things that we say
- 5:10we're going to do. We're not keeping the promises
- 5:12that we've made to ourselves. We don't get to those goals or
- 5:15those intentions because our systems aren't working because
- 5:18we're not working them. And I see this all the time in
- 5:21my clients and just general and general people around me.
- 5:26I know that you do, too. Somebody says they're going to
- 5:29do something and when you talk to them the next time, they
- 5:32didn't do it and they probably have a litany of excuses why
- 5:35they didn't do it. But the bottom line is it's not
- 5:38done and they didn't follow through on what they said they
- 5:41were going to do. That's the definition of low
- 5:44integrity. Now I'm going to call this out.
- 5:47It's a very human thing. I'm not judging.
- 5:51I'm not pointing fingers because we all do it.
- 5:53I do it too. We procrastinate, we avoid, we
- 5:57do a bunch of other stuff that isn't really necessary, or we do
- 5:59surface work instead of the deep work.
- 6:02We empty the dishwasher instead of finishing the project.
- 6:04That feels a little bit hard. I'm raising my hand because I'm
- 6:07guilty of doing that. We avoid the difficult
- 6:10conversation, and instead we go run errands or we do something
- 6:14else. So we can acknowledge that we're
- 6:16all susceptible to falling into that trap of avoidance or
- 6:20procrastination, but we also have to acknowledge that the
- 6:23more you do what you say you're going to do, the faster you get
- 6:27things done. That's the equation.
- 6:30In other words, the higher integrity you have, the more
- 6:33productive you are in less time with greater satisfaction, the
- 6:38thing that we all want. You remember working with groups
- 6:42when you were in high school? I always hated group projects.
- 6:47I was always a person who got stuck doing a lot of the work.
- 6:50And there were always one or two people who got away with doing
- 6:53like barely anything. And by nature of group projects,
- 6:56everybody got the same grade. So I was always pissed with the
- 7:00whole situation because it seems like you couldn't avoid getting
- 7:03stuck with somebody who didn't follow through and do what they
- 7:06said they were going to do. Have you ever been in that
- 7:08situation? The same idea of integrity
- 7:13applies to groups and teams. The less integrity a group of
- 7:17people has together, meaning the less they do what they say
- 7:20they're going to do, the longer it will take to get something
- 7:23done. And that makes sense to us,
- 7:26right? Think about it from your own
- 7:30personal standpoint. How do you feel when you don't
- 7:34do what you say you're going to do?
- 7:37Most people feel bad. Most people feel a little bit
- 7:40guilty. They might even feel a little
- 7:42bit of shame. Often times we can start to make
- 7:46excuses or blame other people. We might be gossiping about it.
- 7:50We might get into victim mode. And all of that is kind of
- 7:54wasted energy because it doesn't really move the needle on
- 7:57anything. The other thing that happens
- 8:00when we don't keep our word to ourselves is that it chips away
- 8:02at our self-confidence. And over time, if we're
- 8:06constantly disappointing ourselves with broken promises
- 8:09or unfulfilled requests or lack of follow through, whatever it
- 8:12might be, we find that we become a version of ourselves that has
- 8:15very low self esteem and low self-confidence.
- 8:20Let me ask you this, when people are feeling low self-confidence,
- 8:25low self esteem, shame or guilt, do you think they're more
- 8:29productive or less productive? I'm sure that wasn't hard to
- 8:34answer. Less productive.
- 8:37We don't want to be slowing ourselves down in any capacity.
- 8:41We don't. That's not what we want as
- 8:43humans. We like to move.
- 8:45We like to be in motion. We like to feel success in a
- 8:48fast way, whether it's getting the things we desire in our life
- 8:52or in our relationships or as a leader, as a business owner.
- 8:54We don't want to be slowing ourselves down.
- 8:57And that's why this concept of integrity matters so much.
- 9:01Now, we'll branch off here for a second because if you're like
- 9:03me, I instantly think of the resistance from clients if I'm
- 9:07talking about this or the resistance that I might feel if
- 9:11somebody was sharing this with me.
- 9:13And my initial response would be, wait a minute.
- 9:17How can we expect ourselves to keep every promise that we ever
- 9:20make to ourselves? How can we follow through in
- 9:22every single thing that we say we're going to do?
- 9:25Doesn't life get in the way? Aren't there some things that
- 9:28are just out of our control, circumstances we didn't see
- 9:31coming? And the answer is, of course,
- 9:34yes. Yes, there are things and
- 9:37circumstances that are going to surprise us and be out of our
- 9:40control and get in the way. But we can make room for that
- 9:45and still have commitment to ourselves.
- 9:48If I ask somebody, what percent of the time are you going to
- 9:51follow through on the things that you say you're going to do?
- 9:53And they say to me, I don't know, probably 75%.
- 9:57I'm going to wonder if I can trust them. 75%, OK, even saying
- 10:03that to myself, OK, Steph, you're going to follow through
- 10:05on 75% of the things that you say you're going to do.
- 10:10That feels pretty wobbly to me. That feels weak.
- 10:13And I don't even know if I could trust myself when I say
- 10:15something like that out loud. But if I were to say to myself,
- 10:19Steph, you're going to commit to doing 100% of the things that
- 10:23you say you're going to do, that makes me think about things
- 10:27differently. First of all, I trust myself a
- 10:30lot more. It also makes me think about
- 10:33what I'm going to say yes to and what I should be saying no to,
- 10:36especially if I have to be 100% in my commitments.
- 10:39It makes me take a lot more action.
- 10:42It makes me feel a lot more thoughtful about what I put on
- 10:45my To Do List each day. It makes me want to communicate
- 10:48much more directly, and yet I can still hold space for the
- 10:52fact that I can't control everything in life because I can
- 10:56understand nuance and Gray areas.
- 10:59I can understand that there's a little bit of yen and a little
- 11:01bit of Yang here. One of the ways that helps me
- 11:06think about this, and I stole this from Jason Jaggart, he says
- 11:09to think about integrity as a volume knob rather than a light
- 11:13switch. Meaning you don't just turn
- 11:15integrity off and on like flipping a switch.
- 11:19It's not all or nothing. It's much more like turning up
- 11:22the volume. How can you turn up the volume
- 11:26on your own integrity in your life?
- 11:27How can you follow through on more of the things that you say
- 11:29you're going to do? How can you amplify your impact
- 11:33by getting more done in less time with more satisfaction?
- 11:38That's the question of the year for me.
- 11:41I think I mentioned to you guys in a recent podcast that my
- 11:43mantra for this year is finish line.
- 11:46I want to finish what I say I'm going to do.
- 11:48I want to take action and execute this year.
- 11:51And it's not that I wasn't doing that last year, I was, but I
- 11:54very much want to turn up the volume on this because I
- 11:57recognize that my integrity is the way to getting what I want.
- 12:04Now a quick tip before we close because another question that
- 12:07clients always ask me is how, how do I turn up the volume on
- 12:11my integrity? How do I follow through on more
- 12:13of the things that I say I'm going to do?
- 12:16One of the best ways to do this is to write it down.
- 12:20Write stuff down. Don't just let it live in your
- 12:24head. I recently had a client who told
- 12:27me I didn't even have a financial goal this year.
- 12:30I never wrote anything down. I just thought about it a couple
- 12:32times and guess what? He didn't meet his financial
- 12:36goal because it never lived outside of that space between
- 12:40his ears. And guess what?
- 12:42A lot of stuff gets lost up in there.
- 12:45We forget things. There's so much information
- 12:48coming into our brains. If we have it bouncing around in
- 12:51our brains and we're relying on that to be our motivator, guys,
- 12:55it's going to get lost. So write down the things that
- 12:58you say you're going to do. Write down your intentions, the
- 13:02goals. Store your word outside of your
- 13:05head. That way you can see it, other
- 13:08people can see it, and it doesn't get forgotten or lost.
- 13:12So that's my challenge to you this week is to think about how
- 13:16can I turn up the volume on my integrity and how can I write
- 13:19some of this stuff down so that it lives outside of my head and
- 13:24in the real world. I hope that this conversation
- 13:27feels energizing for you. I know you have some big desires
- 13:31and goals for your life and I want to see you bring them into
- 13:34reality. I've I've got your back on this
- 13:37podcast. I'm here to support you.
- 13:39So here's the higher integrity this year.
- 13:42Thank you for listening to the show.
- 13:44And as always, team, thank you for being ready to Impact.
- 13:48Thanks for listening to Impact Ready.
- 13:50I hope today's episode inspired you to own your impact and
- 13:53recognize that you are powerful. By elevating our energy and
- 13:57awareness, we can create exponential change in this life.
- 14:01If you enjoyed today's insights, share them with a friend and
- 14:03subscribe to the show for more. I truly appreciate you.
- 14:06Thanks again for being here.