Transcript

336 - RIP HeeHaw · Fartmouth

0:00
SPEAKER_02: This might be the first week that I I got nothing as far as a cold open.
0:06
SPEAKER_02: I have no ideas.
0:08
SPEAKER_02: I have no inspiration.
0:10
SPEAKER_02: I have no I I'm at a loss.
0:14
SPEAKER_02: I'm just so torn up.
0:16
SPEAKER_02: And you guys will find out why here in a second, but I am just well that's its own cold open.
0:22
SPEAKER_02: I'm beside myself.
0:23
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
0:24
SPEAKER_02: I don't have it in me.
0:25
SPEAKER_02: I'm sorry, guys.
0:25
SPEAKER_02: I'm beside myself.
0:29
SPEAKER_02: Thank you for listening.
0:34
SPEAKER_00: Fartmouth University.
0:38
SPEAKER_00: Justice for he ha R I P.
0:41
SPEAKER_00: It's still A C A B A Cab, motherfucker.
0:47
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, fuck them cops, dude.
0:49
SPEAKER_00: Moment of silence.
0:50
SPEAKER_00: Yep.
0:51
SPEAKER_02: We're gonna find out soon if it's AA cab, because it might be all agricultural cops are bastards, too.
0:59
SPEAKER_02: Depending on what they fucking come up with.
1:01
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, dude.
1:01
SPEAKER_02: This is you're up to bat, bro.
1:04
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I need that body cam footage.
1:06
SPEAKER_02: Hop on that horse, trot on down there, and show us the drone footage.
1:11
SPEAKER_02: I want to know exactly how ferocious that miniature donkey looked, charging at that poor, defenseless, gun-toting officer.
1:22
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, same.
1:23
SPEAKER_00: Look it up.
1:24
SPEAKER_00: Happened in Georgia.
1:26
SPEAKER_02: Has the the guy that shot the donkey has anything of like his visage been released?
1:31
SPEAKER_02: Is he a tubby cop?
1:32
SPEAKER_02: He is.
1:33
SPEAKER_02: Of course.
1:34
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
1:34
SPEAKER_02: He's like, I can't ruin that little fucker.
1:38
SPEAKER_02: I'm gonna have to smoke it.
1:40
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
1:41
SPEAKER_00: He's not like uh comically large like many police officers are in dash or in body cam videos, but he's he's hefty.
1:50
SPEAKER_00: He was definitely shopping in the husky section as a kid, let's say that for sure.
1:54
SPEAKER_02: I like when they have the the chubby round face that looks it's like the collar of their cop uniform looks like it's pushing their fucking jowl.
2:03
SPEAKER_00: No neck, yeah.
2:04
SPEAKER_02: It's like shoving their jowls into their eyes.
2:07
SPEAKER_02: They're always squinting because they're like Squinting Tarantino.
2:11
SPEAKER_02: They can't fucking breathe, ironically.
2:13
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
2:17
SPEAKER_02: Their little outfits.
2:19
SPEAKER_02: That's another thing I like to call it is like their little instead of their uniform, I like to call it their little outfits.
2:25
SPEAKER_02: You guys look so tough in your little outfits.
2:27
SPEAKER_02: You're so awesome.
2:28
SPEAKER_00: Your little costume.
2:30
SPEAKER_02: I love it.
2:31
SPEAKER_02: Happy Halloween, you fucking phonies.
2:33
SPEAKER_02: Your uniform.
2:34
SPEAKER_02: Oh, we're out to protect back to blue and gone.
2:41
SPEAKER_02: Uh oh, yeah, I have an intro joke.
2:43
SPEAKER_02: That's right.
2:43
SPEAKER_02: Welcome everyone to Fart Mouth Podcast, the podcast equivalent of your local dollar general.
2:49
SPEAKER_02: There's two employees, neither of which know what the fuck they're doing.
2:53
SPEAKER_02: No one's gonna help you, and you only came here because every other option had failed you.
2:58
SPEAKER_02: But every once in a while, you leave here thinking good enough.
3:06
SPEAKER_02: Every week we do a few rotating segments and make each other laugh.
3:08
SPEAKER_02: I'm Tyler.
3:09
SPEAKER_02: I'm Jake.
3:10
SPEAKER_02: And we're gonna get into segments and not spend a half an hour talking about the cops.
3:16
SPEAKER_02: Would you rather?
3:20
SPEAKER_00: That uh that was one of my favorite of your intro jokes.
3:23
SPEAKER_00: Oh, really?
3:24
SPEAKER_00: Of all time.
3:24
SPEAKER_00: That was great.
3:25
SPEAKER_02: Damn, that was great writing.
3:26
SPEAKER_02: Thanks.
3:27
SPEAKER_02: I uh picked a premise and I spent 20 minutes trying to make it work.
3:31
SPEAKER_00: Well, it time well spent, dude.
3:33
SPEAKER_00: It was great.
3:34
SPEAKER_00: Uh Justice for Hee-ha.
3:36
SPEAKER_00: Won't say it again.
3:37
SPEAKER_02: Rule of threes and a turn.
3:39
SPEAKER_02: Um your topic last week.
3:42
SPEAKER_02: Yes.
3:42
SPEAKER_02: Was whores two weeks ago was whores.
3:44
SPEAKER_02: Last time we did it.
3:45
SPEAKER_02: Last week was uh Spurgy Spooks.
3:48
SPEAKER_02: Yes.
3:48
SPEAKER_02: And I love that segment mostly because I get to do voices again.
3:53
SPEAKER_02: Ah, true.
3:54
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
3:54
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
3:55
SPEAKER_00: I listened to an old episode today.
3:57
SPEAKER_00: Oh my god.
3:58
SPEAKER_00: I forgot that I did the intro bit live.
4:02
SPEAKER_02: Oh, yeah.
4:03
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
4:03
SPEAKER_00: I forgot that I did that.
4:04
SPEAKER_02: I forgot you did that too.
4:05
SPEAKER_00: And I also forgot that we truncated silence, so it almost sounded fast-forwarded at times.
4:10
SPEAKER_00: Oh, we cut out all the dead.
4:12
SPEAKER_00: And then I I in this episode that I listened to, we were doing second half comebacks, and you uh when you were scrubbing through, you skipped the first second half comeback.
4:23
SPEAKER_00: Oh no.
4:24
SPEAKER_00: So that it truncated the silence.
4:27
SPEAKER_00: So it was like there was no like uh gap.
4:33
SPEAKER_00: Oh, I see.
4:34
SPEAKER_00: So it's just sounded like a horrific sentence.
4:37
SPEAKER_00: It just was like, whoa, you've got to put a pause there, buddy.
4:41
SPEAKER_02: Well, I didn't fuck I was doing as much.
4:43
SPEAKER_00: No, it was episode 11.
4:45
SPEAKER_00: So we were or 12, I think.
4:47
SPEAKER_00: We were early on.
4:48
SPEAKER_00: I just thought, why not?
4:49
SPEAKER_00: We were so jazzed up.
4:51
SPEAKER_00: We were, dude.
4:52
SPEAKER_00: Uh anyway, I had I had like one or two good ones.
4:55
SPEAKER_00: There's always at least one or two good ones, man.
4:57
SPEAKER_00: It was the episode where we prank called the printer place.
5:00
SPEAKER_02: God, that was so fun.
5:01
SPEAKER_02: You know what I I have an idea written down.
5:04
SPEAKER_02: What I think is a really good idea for a prank phone call.
5:07
SPEAKER_02: I thought of it a few weeks ago and I wrote it down, and I don't know what I'm gonna do with it yet.
5:14
SPEAKER_02: Maybe we'll do it on Patreon, and if it's a fucking banger, we'll like we did before, we'll throw up just that prank call on the main show as a bonus up thing.
5:22
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, yeah.
5:22
SPEAKER_02: Whatever 15, 20 minutes it takes.
5:24
SPEAKER_02: But I think it's a fucking hilarious idea.
5:26
SPEAKER_02: I can't I kinda can't wait to get into it, but I gotta set all the shit up for it, and I keep forgetting.
5:31
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, okay.
5:32
SPEAKER_02: Not in the I've been on this Michael McDonald tip too.
5:35
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
5:35
SPEAKER_02: Somebody brought up yacht rock last night.
5:37
SPEAKER_00: Okay, but again.
5:38
SPEAKER_02: And I can't get fucking Michael McDonald out of my head.
5:41
SPEAKER_00: Yep.
5:42
SPEAKER_02: Anyway, sorry.
5:43
SPEAKER_02: My topic from two weeks ago was horse.
5:46
SPEAKER_00: Horse.
5:47
SPEAKER_00: Hooers, as Frank Reynolds uh calls them.
5:51
SPEAKER_00: If they're mixed, they're mules.
5:55
SPEAKER_00: But don't don't tell the cops.
5:57
SPEAKER_00: All right, so they'll get riled up.
6:00
SPEAKER_00: So I thought of I don't know.
6:02
SPEAKER_00: I don't know how much I believe in either of these, so I'm just gonna I'm just gonna do them.
6:07
SPEAKER_00: Do them! Would you rather, Tyler?
6:09
SPEAKER_00: Get gonorrhea every three days from a one.
6:15
SPEAKER_00: Okay.
6:16
SPEAKER_02: Just a just attacking my character.
6:18
SPEAKER_00: Just a slophog, just a a fucking just, you know?
6:24
SPEAKER_00: Sure.
6:24
SPEAKER_00: That could be your name.
6:25
SPEAKER_00: Trying to give me flashbacks, dude.
6:30
SPEAKER_00: Or get AIDS once from a six.
6:35
SPEAKER_02: Oh.
6:36
SPEAKER_02: In both of these scenarios, you the best I can do is a six, bro.
6:40
SPEAKER_00: What the fuck?
6:41
SPEAKER_00: Well, I didn't want to like goose up the numbers on the second one, or you would be like, well, obviously I'm gonna go for that because otherwise I'm getting gonorrhea every three fucking days.
6:52
SPEAKER_00: And I I I did uh take into account the treatability of AIDS now.
6:56
SPEAKER_00: Sure, sure.
6:57
SPEAKER_00: Where you you basically don't even get AIDS, it stays at HIV.
7:01
SPEAKER_00: Right.
7:01
SPEAKER_00: And then the virus is so little in your system that it won't even show up on a blood test.
7:07
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
7:08
SPEAKER_00: So you can't really even give it to anyone at that point.
7:11
SPEAKER_02: So here's like a toddler thought that I have.
7:14
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
7:14
SPEAKER_02: Because I have some of these sometimes where it's like, I know that the answer is no.
7:20
SPEAKER_02: I want it explained to me by a person that works in the field that understands it to explain to me why.
7:26
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
7:27
SPEAKER_02: And I would love to have conversations with people like this.
7:29
SPEAKER_02: And occasionally I remember these stupid ass questions and I ask them like when I'm at the doctor's office or something, and I'm like, hey, by the way, I'm curious.
7:39
SPEAKER_02: Why can't this thing do thing, right?
7:42
SPEAKER_02: So here's the thought that I had, and I want to posit this to medical professionals out there that might be listening to this.
7:48
SPEAKER_02: Sure.
7:49
SPEAKER_02: Why can't why come?
7:51
SPEAKER_02: Why not take blood out and put new blood in?
7:56
SPEAKER_02: All of it?
7:57
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
7:58
SPEAKER_02: Why I'm just listening hear me out.
8:02
SPEAKER_02: You got a vein on the left, you got a vein on the right.
8:04
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
8:05
SPEAKER_02: You got 40,000 CCs of blood or whatever the fuck it takes to replace all your blood.
8:10
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, yeah.
8:11
SPEAKER_02: That's a we got that.
8:13
SPEAKER_02: We do got that.
8:14
SPEAKER_00: We do.
8:14
SPEAKER_02: So why not drain out all the AIDS blood and put in the not AIDS blood?
8:21
SPEAKER_00: I think there's still trace amounts of AIDS.
8:24
SPEAKER_02: You think that shit just clings to your fucking capillaries instead?
8:27
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, there's like it's it's in there somewhere.
8:29
SPEAKER_00: Cause because uh like mothers can pass AIDS on through breast milk, right?
8:35
SPEAKER_00: And there's AIDS in your cum, and there I think I think the AIDS goes other places, you know.
8:40
SPEAKER_00: That's my non-medical uh professional uh POV on it, but uh that's my answer.
8:47
SPEAKER_02: Well well, my well here's here's part two to that question.
8:50
SPEAKER_00: Uh-huh.
8:51
SPEAKER_02: We haven't tried it though, why not?
8:52
SPEAKER_02: True.
8:53
SPEAKER_02: I I bet they did in the eighties.
8:56
SPEAKER_00: They drained some gay dudes fucking dry in the eighties, trying that shit.
9:02
SPEAKER_00: Bloodletting, they were like, oh fuck, dude, my grandpa told me about this.
9:06
SPEAKER_00: Let's try it on these AIDSy motherfuckers.
9:09
SPEAKER_02: Right.
9:10
SPEAKER_02: Do you think the AIDS gets in your brain?
9:12
SPEAKER_02: Because it's in your blood, right?
9:13
SPEAKER_02: Surely to goodness, yeah.
9:14
SPEAKER_02: It's in your brain.
9:15
SPEAKER_02: I I guess the real thing is like AIDS doesn't just like live in your blood, like it's eating your cells and shit.
9:20
SPEAKER_02: So I guess it's like Well, the yeah, the viruses, yeah.
9:23
SPEAKER_02: It's in you all over the place.
9:26
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
9:27
SPEAKER_02: If it was cum and you held up a black light, they would be fucking glowing.
9:31
SPEAKER_00: Right, right.
9:32
SPEAKER_00: It's an immunosuppressive disorder, right?
9:34
SPEAKER_00: So it it basically kills your immune system.
9:37
SPEAKER_00: So then something else comes along, like an infection, a secondary infection or whatever, and like takes you out for secondary infection.
9:44
SPEAKER_02: That's a good name.
9:45
SPEAKER_00: I don't think anyone actually dies from AIDS.
9:48
SPEAKER_00: I think AIDS is just right, because AIDS is autoimmune deficiency syndrome.
9:53
SPEAKER_00: So your immune system just shuts off.
9:55
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
9:55
SPEAKER_00: And then anything else can just come along and butt fuck you.
9:58
SPEAKER_02: Conjunctivitis could kill you at that point.
10:00
SPEAKER_00: Dude, AIDS people should just be bubble boys.
10:03
SPEAKER_00: AIDS AIDS dudes should just always be bubble boys, man.
10:06
SPEAKER_02: Maybe that would work.
10:07
SPEAKER_00: Jake Gillenhaul, that shit, dude.
10:08
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
10:09
SPEAKER_02: You could put two of them in the bubble together.
10:11
unknown: Yeah.
10:13
SPEAKER_00: Hey, uh Quentin, Jeff, you both you get along, right?
10:18
SPEAKER_02: I thought you were about to see it.
10:20
SPEAKER_02: I thought you were about to be like, hey, science.
10:22
SPEAKER_02: Hello?
10:22
SPEAKER_00: Oh, yeah.
10:23
SPEAKER_00: Do the thing.
10:24
SPEAKER_00: I was trying to think of dude names.
10:26
SPEAKER_02: Put two gay AIDS men in a bubble together.
10:28
SPEAKER_00: And earlier I made a Tarantino pun, so I've he Quentin was on the fucking break.
10:33
SPEAKER_02: I got you.
10:34
SPEAKER_00: And we talked about uh French stuff, and my favorite director is a French director.
10:38
SPEAKER_00: First name Quentin.
10:39
SPEAKER_00: Gotcha.
10:40
SPEAKER_00: Uh oh, that was just for Bubble Boy.
10:44
SPEAKER_00: The moops.
10:45
SPEAKER_00: Have you seen that?
10:46
SPEAKER_00: Oh, yeah.
10:47
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
10:47
SPEAKER_00: I've seen that.
10:48
SPEAKER_00: That's Seinfeld.
10:50
SPEAKER_00: Bubble Boy?
10:50
SPEAKER_00: I saw Bubble.
10:51
SPEAKER_00: Jake Gillenhall.
10:52
SPEAKER_02: Was it Jake Jillenhall?
10:53
SPEAKER_02: I thought it was uh the guy from fucking uh Oddly enough, it was Jake Gyllenhaal.
10:56
SPEAKER_02: No, no, no, no.
10:57
SPEAKER_02: I thought it was the guy from American Pie.
10:59
SPEAKER_00: No, Jason Biggs?
11:01
SPEAKER_02: No, no, no.
11:02
SPEAKER_02: With the spiky hair and shit?
11:03
SPEAKER_02: No, that's not him.
11:04
SPEAKER_00: It's uh it's Jake Gyllenhaal.
11:05
SPEAKER_02: And he has the spiky hair though, from the movie Bubble Boy.
11:08
SPEAKER_02: Yes, he does, yeah.
11:08
SPEAKER_00: Jake Gyllenhaal has spiky hair.
11:10
SPEAKER_00: It's Jake Jillen.
11:10
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
11:11
SPEAKER_02: My brain is so confused.
11:12
SPEAKER_02: It's weird, dude.
11:13
SPEAKER_02: It was Jason Biggs.
11:14
SPEAKER_02: It does not like move the Mandela effect.
11:17
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, but I remember watching that at a friend's house when I was like 12, and I was like, why is he in this?
11:24
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
11:25
SPEAKER_00: This should be Sean William Scott or somebody.
11:26
SPEAKER_00: Like is this him?
11:28
SPEAKER_02: It should be Jason Biggs.
11:29
SPEAKER_02: It should be Jason Biggs.
11:30
SPEAKER_02: And that's why Mandela effect.
11:33
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
11:34
SPEAKER_02: I get it.
11:34
SPEAKER_02: Now.
11:35
SPEAKER_02: You got it, man.
11:36
SPEAKER_02: Everything else they've ever said is gay and retarded.
11:38
SPEAKER_02: Bro.
11:39
SPEAKER_02: But now that I'm experiencing a moment of it, it's real.
11:42
SPEAKER_00: I just discovered the cornucopia thing from Fruit of the Loom.
11:46
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
11:46
SPEAKER_00: Just discovered that entire rabbit hole like four days ago.
11:51
SPEAKER_02: It's the one that I remember when I was reading up about it that I was like, I do remember that.
11:56
SPEAKER_00: It's the only one.
11:57
SPEAKER_00: Every other one, I'm like, it's Shaquille O'Neal, not fucking Sinbad.
12:01
SPEAKER_02: It's whatever.
12:02
SPEAKER_00: Like Mandela fucking didn't die in prison.
12:05
SPEAKER_02: I never even that's the funny thing because it's the most pro he did die in prison, right?
12:09
SPEAKER_02: It's the so he didn't.
12:11
SPEAKER_00: God damn it.
12:13
SPEAKER_02: He didn't.
12:13
SPEAKER_02: He got out of prison and then became the Oh right, yeah.
12:16
SPEAKER_00: He became the fucking guy that we all know him as after prison.
12:20
SPEAKER_00: That's right.
12:20
SPEAKER_00: Yes.
12:21
SPEAKER_00: That's the one that's I remember that thing.
12:22
SPEAKER_02: It's the thing it's named after, and it's the one that is the least like to me the least plausible, believable.
12:29
SPEAKER_02: It's like so obviously not true.
12:32
SPEAKER_02: And then it's funny too, because then every single one of them after that is all just like some petty pop culture advertising.
12:40
SPEAKER_02: It's a movie or a uh an image or something.
12:43
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, yeah.
12:43
SPEAKER_02: But Baron stained bears.
12:45
SPEAKER_02: Like you just didn't you stopped paying like everyone else, when you understand a word and recognize it, you stop paying attention after like the fourth letter.
12:52
SPEAKER_02: Right.
12:53
SPEAKER_02: You know what I mean?
12:53
SPEAKER_02: Like that's why you know, have you ever seen that thing where like they jumble letters together, but the first two or three letters and you can read the whole thing just at the same speed?
13:02
SPEAKER_02: Right.
13:03
SPEAKER_02: Because your brain just figures it out, dude.
13:05
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
13:06
SPEAKER_02: The brain is a weird thing and pattern recognition, brother.
13:09
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
13:10
SPEAKER_02: So, you know, but Jason Biggs was definitely bubble boy, I'm convinced.
13:16
SPEAKER_02: He was not.
13:17
SPEAKER_02: He was not.
13:18
SPEAKER_01: It definitely was.
13:19
SPEAKER_02: Now I do not know him and Sinbad are in a fucking hole somewhere, like we were in that movie, dog.
13:25
SPEAKER_00: Uh I do not know whether Mandela died in prison now.
13:29
SPEAKER_00: He did not.
13:30
SPEAKER_00: I didn't think he did.
13:31
SPEAKER_00: I thought he became the civil rights leader that he was known as after it just shows you he did, yeah.
13:37
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
13:38
SPEAKER_02: The prison stuff is why he became such a hoisted up on his you know pedestal was because uh apartheid put him in prison and then he was like, I'm not the president.
13:50
SPEAKER_02: Uh I'm the president, no.
13:52
SPEAKER_00: Like a small my uh my brain was like, hold on, man, what if you're wrong?
14:00
SPEAKER_00: What if you're wrong about the namesake of the of the phenomenon?
14:04
SPEAKER_00: You can't be wrong about that, so you gotta at least throw out a maybe not.
14:07
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
14:08
SPEAKER_02: I don't know.
14:08
SPEAKER_02: That one just I was like, I've no, I don't ever remember hearing anyone talk about him dying at all.
14:16
SPEAKER_02: And then he did, and I was like, see?
14:19
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
14:20
unknown: Yeah.
14:22
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
14:22
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, there's some weird ones.
14:24
SPEAKER_00: Those are the big.
14:24
SPEAKER_00: We would name the big ones.
14:26
SPEAKER_00: Sure.
14:26
SPEAKER_00: But uh there's some like I had never heard of the Fruit of the Loom one until four days ago.
14:31
SPEAKER_00: That's the only one where I'm like, I don't know, dude.
14:33
SPEAKER_00: Dude, it was a there was a cornucopia on the advertising.
14:38
SPEAKER_00: It maybe wasn't on the fucking tag, but there were fucking billboards and different shit with that.
14:45
SPEAKER_00: That's what I remember.
14:47
SPEAKER_00: I remember it like seeing it picked out places.
14:50
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
14:51
SPEAKER_00: Like in the store.
14:52
SPEAKER_00: That was part of the logo in the store above it at fucking Kmart or whatever.
14:57
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
14:57
SPEAKER_00: As a child.
14:58
SPEAKER_02: I'll tell you what, dude.
15:01
SPEAKER_02: I like the current day advertising is so much worse.
15:08
SPEAKER_02: And it's not even just nostalgia.
15:10
SPEAKER_02: I have proof.
15:11
SPEAKER_02: The current day advertising is so much worse than the advertising when we were kids.
15:16
SPEAKER_02: Like the late 90s, early 2000s.
15:20
SPEAKER_02: Because they did jingles.
15:22
SPEAKER_02: That's why.
15:23
SPEAKER_02: That's huge.
15:24
SPEAKER_02: The jingles were good.
15:25
SPEAKER_02: They don't fucking do jingles anymore.
15:28
SPEAKER_02: And that's why no one gives a fuck about your ad.
15:31
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
15:31
SPEAKER_02: Liberty Biberty can suck my fucking nutsack.
15:35
SPEAKER_00: But that's not a jingle.
15:37
SPEAKER_00: It's not long enough.
15:38
SPEAKER_00: That's a catchphrase that's melodic.
15:40
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
15:40
SPEAKER_00: That's not an official jingle to me.
15:42
SPEAKER_02: It's just two words that rhyme, and the other one is fucking nonsense.
15:46
SPEAKER_00: Safe auto.
15:47
SPEAKER_00: That's a jingle.
15:48
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
15:49
SPEAKER_02: You know?
15:50
SPEAKER_02: Dude, there's whole entire fucking tracks.
15:53
SPEAKER_02: Like uh the free credit report.com baby, that whole thing, bro.
15:59
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
16:00
SPEAKER_02: I'm bars, dude.
16:01
SPEAKER_02: To this day, that shit doesn't exist anymore, and I still remember it.
16:05
SPEAKER_02: You know what I'm saying?
16:06
SPEAKER_02: Like fucking trust the gordons fisherman.
16:10
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
16:11
SPEAKER_02: Bro, I don't like fish sticks at all.
16:14
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
16:14
SPEAKER_00: But I remember that.
16:16
SPEAKER_00: It can be short and be a jingle.
16:18
SPEAKER_00: I just don't think the first example is a jingle.
16:21
SPEAKER_00: Personally.
16:22
SPEAKER_00: To me.
16:23
SPEAKER_00: The freefrecredreport.com?
16:24
SPEAKER_00: No, the second, the very first thing you said that is like a modern one.
16:28
SPEAKER_00: What was it?
16:28
SPEAKER_00: Liberty Bibity.
16:29
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, liberty bibity.
16:30
SPEAKER_02: Well that's like, yeah, that's all they got these days.
16:31
SPEAKER_02: It's like, I don't know, fucking liberty.
16:33
SPEAKER_02: Liberty Liberty.
16:34
SPEAKER_00: It's the same word three times.
16:36
SPEAKER_00: That's not a jingle.
16:38
SPEAKER_00: You have to write a jingle.
16:40
SPEAKER_02: I kind of sort of disagree.
16:42
SPEAKER_00: What jingle do you think of that's a jingle that is Hot Pockets?
16:50
unknown: Ooh.
16:53
SPEAKER_00: Okay, I might grandfather in Hot Pockets.
16:58
SPEAKER_00: I'll grant you that one.
17:00
SPEAKER_00: But I just think Liberty is lazier.
17:02
SPEAKER_00: Hot Pockets got there first.
17:04
SPEAKER_02: Liberty, Liberty, Liberty is a shitty jingle.
17:07
SPEAKER_02: It's too lazy.
17:08
SPEAKER_02: I think it still counts.
17:09
SPEAKER_02: It's just a bad one.
17:12
SPEAKER_00: Maybe that's why I'm saying it doesn't count because I don't feel like it counts.
17:15
SPEAKER_00: You even safe auto.
17:19
SPEAKER_00: Well, no, safe auto had the whole song, right?
17:22
SPEAKER_00: Maybe.
17:23
SPEAKER_00: Did they not?
17:24
SPEAKER_00: What am I thinking of?
17:25
SPEAKER_00: If not.
17:25
SPEAKER_02: 1-800.
17:26
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
17:27
SPEAKER_02: Say photo.
17:28
SPEAKER_00: Pick up the phone, the call is free.
17:30
SPEAKER_00: It's a 1-800.
17:33
SPEAKER_00: They have that?
17:34
SPEAKER_00: Say photo.
17:35
SPEAKER_00: You're right.
17:35
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
17:35
SPEAKER_00: Here's a new.
17:36
SPEAKER_00: That's a fucking jangle, bro.
17:38
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, bro.
17:39
SPEAKER_00: Dude.
17:40
SPEAKER_00: And it's not even.
17:42
SPEAKER_00: There's a rhyme to the pick up the phone, the call is free.
17:45
SPEAKER_00: We're making you our priority or something.
17:47
SPEAKER_00: Something like that.
17:48
SPEAKER_00: Something like that.
17:49
SPEAKER_00: There's a fucking whole thing.
17:50
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
17:50
SPEAKER_02: It's jazzy and and fucking full of life, dude.
17:54
SPEAKER_02: Exactly.
17:55
SPEAKER_02: That's why advertising now is objectively worse.
17:58
SPEAKER_02: It's not just nostalgia.
18:00
SPEAKER_02: There is a that's a factor that why I like it so much more, but objectively speaking, fucking dude, that stupid weird fuzzball thing they got on the Liberty mutual, it's fucking gay and weird.
18:14
SPEAKER_02: And it's almost like intentionally bad, which I guess is a whole thing, but it's still like not it.
18:21
SPEAKER_02: You know?
18:22
SPEAKER_02: JG Wentworth, bro?
18:23
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
18:24
SPEAKER_02: With the fucking Viking dude.
18:25
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, yeah.
18:26
SPEAKER_02: Ugh it's I I have a structured settlement and I need cash now.
18:32
SPEAKER_02: Bro, come on.
18:36
SPEAKER_02: There's not a universe where I will ever have a structured settlement on anything, but I know where the fuck I'm going if I do.
18:44
SPEAKER_02: Right.
18:45
SPEAKER_02: You know what I'm saying?
18:46
SPEAKER_02: Hell yeah, dude.
18:47
SPEAKER_02: I'll have s I'll have state farm till I die because it's easier just to keep the insurance you have.
18:52
SPEAKER_02: I ain't going to Liberty Mutual.
18:54
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, dude.
18:54
SPEAKER_00: Fucking Liberty is just throwing shit at the wall.
18:58
SPEAKER_00: Clearly.
18:59
SPEAKER_00: They have like 18 ad campaigns going at the same time.
19:03
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, fuck.
19:03
SPEAKER_00: They got the guy sitting in front of the bridge.
19:05
SPEAKER_00: They got the emu, Limu Emu.
19:07
SPEAKER_00: They got the they got like seven of them.
19:09
SPEAKER_02: Who was who who what company did Realistically it's like seven.
19:12
SPEAKER_02: What company did the guy where it's like he's a stunt man and he's always like bleeding and shit in the ads?
19:18
SPEAKER_02: You know what I'm talking about?
19:19
SPEAKER_00: I feel like it was Liberty Mutual.
19:21
SPEAKER_00: I don't know.
19:22
SPEAKER_00: Are you talking about uh is it progressive that has the Well that's flow?
19:27
SPEAKER_02: Or is it No, yeah, no There was the guy, he was a stunt guy, and he was always like all statement getting the shit beat out of him and he's like, You should get fucking insurance because look how beat up I am.
19:38
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I think we're talking about the same guy.
19:40
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
19:40
SPEAKER_00: He's always in Rex and shit.
19:42
SPEAKER_00: He's all he's in that, but he's also in like a couple of shows, and it's weird to see him in.
19:47
SPEAKER_00: Exactly.
19:47
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
19:48
SPEAKER_00: Uh I'm in trouble or whatever.
19:51
SPEAKER_00: I'm danger.
19:52
SPEAKER_02: Unexpected always happens or some shit.
19:54
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, that that guy.
19:55
SPEAKER_02: I liked those commercials, and I don't know, they didn't have a jingle to them, but like there's just so few and far between that's not dog shit these days.
20:06
SPEAKER_00: Right.
20:06
SPEAKER_00: That it was an effective campaign, I feel like.
20:09
SPEAKER_02: To my brain, it was.
20:10
SPEAKER_02: There's at least once I busted it to flow from Progressive.
20:13
SPEAKER_02: Really?
20:14
SPEAKER_02: She's she's got weird cuteness.
20:16
SPEAKER_02: She's weird out.
20:19
SPEAKER_02: I think I maybe saw a picture where they photoshopped her face on some girl with big bazongas.
20:23
SPEAKER_02: Oh.
20:24
SPEAKER_02: Maybe that's what did it.
20:25
SPEAKER_00: I see.
20:26
SPEAKER_00: I don't know.
20:26
SPEAKER_00: I mean, there's that aspect of it too.
20:29
SPEAKER_00: The sex sells of it as well.
20:31
SPEAKER_00: You know what?
20:32
SPEAKER_00: The one But there's never a jingle with like sex shit that I remember.
20:35
SPEAKER_02: Here's one that worked like a motherfucker.
20:38
SPEAKER_02: Okay, what is it?
20:38
SPEAKER_02: And I know you're gonna fucking relate to this one.
20:40
SPEAKER_02: Okay.
20:41
SPEAKER_02: And the twins.
20:43
SPEAKER_02: Uhorslight.
20:45
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
20:46
SPEAKER_02: Ah, love.
20:48
SPEAKER_02: Something, something, something, something, you know?
20:50
SPEAKER_02: I vaguely remember it, yeah.
20:52
SPEAKER_02: Dude, it was like the beer football commercial for years.
20:57
SPEAKER_02: And the twins.
20:59
SPEAKER_00: Oh, yeah, yeah.
21:00
SPEAKER_00: I remember that.
21:00
SPEAKER_00: I know what you're talking about.
21:02
SPEAKER_00: But it's there.
21:04
SPEAKER_00: It's just, you know.
21:05
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
21:05
SPEAKER_00: I haven't seen it instead of it.
21:06
SPEAKER_02: It was it was fairly short-lived.
21:08
SPEAKER_02: Speak to me as much as it left an impact on me because there was fucking hot cheerleaders and it was at a formidable age, brother.
21:13
SPEAKER_02: Oh, okay.
21:14
SPEAKER_02: Also, I liked Corz Light at the time.
21:16
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, okay.
21:17
SPEAKER_00: I see, I see.
21:19
SPEAKER_00: But that's why it didn't speak to me, probably.
21:22
SPEAKER_00: Sex soul now drinking beer until later.
21:24
SPEAKER_00: And the twins.
21:26
SPEAKER_00: Anyway.
21:27
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
21:27
SPEAKER_02: I'll do the AIDS one.
21:29
SPEAKER_03: Oh, okay, sure.
21:30
SPEAKER_02: I mean, a six for me, honestly, in a lot of scenarios, better than a ten.
21:35
SPEAKER_02: They're usually a better lay, they're less annoying.
21:38
SPEAKER_02: They understand their place in life.
21:40
SPEAKER_02: Their lot.
21:41
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
21:42
SPEAKER_02: If you will.
21:43
SPEAKER_03: Okay.
21:44
SPEAKER_00: Um, my uh I like how my Would You Rathers are so bad we have to go on a whole tangent of the colour.
21:50
SPEAKER_00: It's just uh commercials.
21:51
SPEAKER_00: Uh and the the Mandela effect and commercials we just went into.
21:55
SPEAKER_00: Uh that's podcasting, brawl.
21:58
SPEAKER_00: I didn't know how to spell this.
22:00
SPEAKER_00: So I just tried.
22:01
SPEAKER_00: Okay.
22:01
SPEAKER_00: And I guess I didn't have to tell you that, but I thought I would.
22:05
SPEAKER_00: C A T.
22:06
SPEAKER_00: Would you rather?
22:08
SPEAKER_00: What's the topic, Jack?
22:10
SPEAKER_00: Uh oh yeah.
22:11
SPEAKER_00: Fucking uh yarmakas.
22:14
SPEAKER_00: Yahamaka.
22:15
SPEAKER_00: Yarmaka.
22:16
SPEAKER_00: Whatever.
22:17
SPEAKER_00: Yarmakas.
22:17
SPEAKER_00: It's a it's a weird word to spell for sure.
22:19
SPEAKER_00: It is.
22:20
SPEAKER_00: I I ended up with with it's pretty close to Yamaha.
22:24
SPEAKER_00: Like if you're doing that thing you just said, if you if you put yarmica like I spelled it, uh you would read it as Yamaha as you were reading across.
22:32
SPEAKER_02: The only reason I remember why you're wrong is because it is so weird, and I remember I read it as yarmook.
22:38
SPEAKER_00: Oh, yeah.
22:39
SPEAKER_00: Because it's like yarmaka.
22:41
SPEAKER_00: I knew it was something crazy, and I knew I wasn't gonna be able to do it, so I was like, might as well go phonetic, where I know what it means.
22:49
SPEAKER_00: Uh yarmicas, yeah.
22:50
SPEAKER_00: Cause like it's one of the most embarrassing hats.
22:55
SPEAKER_00: It's yeah.
22:56
SPEAKER_00: Like, I'm sorry.
22:57
SPEAKER_00: I'm not trying to be anti-Semitic.
22:58
SPEAKER_00: I know it's part of their religion.
23:00
SPEAKER_00: Like, I'll make Jew jokes all day.
23:02
SPEAKER_00: I'm not trying to right now.
23:03
SPEAKER_00: It legitimately is off-putting looking to my brain for some reason.
23:08
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
23:08
SPEAKER_00: Just the hat.
23:09
SPEAKER_00: It has nothing to do with the religion or what it's connected to.
23:12
SPEAKER_00: If I saw a a small hat like that that was different, that wasn't a technically a yarmika, I would think the exact same thing.
23:19
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
23:19
SPEAKER_00: It sucks.
23:20
SPEAKER_02: It's like seeing an adult out at a restaurant with a baby bib on.
23:25
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
23:26
SPEAKER_02: Because it's so little and comically it's comically small.
23:29
SPEAKER_02: Anything is that's comically small on a person is funny.
23:34
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
23:34
SPEAKER_00: Uh fucking art the clown has a tiny hat.
23:37
SPEAKER_02: Mm-hmm.
23:38
SPEAKER_00: You know why?
23:39
SPEAKER_00: Because it's disturbing to have a tiny fucking hat, dude.
23:43
SPEAKER_00: It's weird.
23:44
SPEAKER_00: It doesn't do the thing.
23:45
SPEAKER_00: It's supposed to cover your head.
23:47
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
23:47
SPEAKER_00: It's not effective at that.
23:49
SPEAKER_00: I think they were just trying to cover their bald spot because they get like that little monk, right, right.
23:54
SPEAKER_00: That's the yeah, that's the conspiracy theory.
23:57
SPEAKER_00: Which there are no other ones about Jews, so don't worry about that.
24:02
SPEAKER_00: Uh there's no end.
24:04
SPEAKER_00: That's it.
24:04
SPEAKER_00: Uh so I guess they control the weather so they can decide if it rains on their hat.
24:10
SPEAKER_00: They they don't have to worry about it raining on their head.
24:13
SPEAKER_00: Um I see.
24:14
SPEAKER_00: So can you please make it cooler this weekend?
24:17
SPEAKER_00: Would you do Jews?
24:18
SPEAKER_00: Come on.
24:19
SPEAKER_00: Uh, would you rather wear and when I put it in the would you rather I hadn't spelled yarmulkas yet or tried to, so I put wear a Jew hat.
24:29
SPEAKER_00: Would you rather wear a yarmulca for the rest of your life?
24:34
SPEAKER_00: Everywhere.
24:35
SPEAKER_00: The same hat.
24:37
unknown: Damn.
24:37
SPEAKER_00: You gotta wear it everywhere.
24:39
SPEAKER_00: I don't get to pimp it out.
24:40
SPEAKER_00: You do not take it off ever.
24:43
SPEAKER_00: Shower.
24:44
SPEAKER_00: No.
24:44
SPEAKER_00: Damn.
24:45
SPEAKER_00: Anywhere.
24:46
SPEAKER_00: You have to leave it on, which means there's gonna be some dead grass under that motherfucker, dude.
24:51
SPEAKER_00: You know?
24:52
SPEAKER_00: It's gonna be a problem.
24:53
SPEAKER_00: Uh or eat a bowl of cereal out of a homeless man's yarmica after he has worn it for like a whole month in the summer.
25:05
SPEAKER_00: And you gotta do that every summer for five years.
25:10
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
25:10
SPEAKER_00: I added that part because I realized how insanely one-sided this would you rather was until I did so at the last minute.
25:18
SPEAKER_02: I'm gonna talk about cereal for a second.
25:20
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
25:22
SPEAKER_02: It's not that I don't like cereal, because there are cereals I enjoy.
25:26
SPEAKER_02: Obviously, I've said it a million times.
25:29
SPEAKER_02: I'm not like a big sweets guy.
25:30
SPEAKER_02: Oh, it's a cookie crisp then.
25:32
SPEAKER_02: Uh not at all, dude.
25:33
SPEAKER_02: Did you ever have it though?
25:34
SPEAKER_02: I have had it.
25:35
SPEAKER_02: I mean, when I was a kid, I'm not terrible.
25:37
SPEAKER_02: It's not terrible.
25:38
SPEAKER_02: Every I think every kid likes sweets, but as an adult, after a certain point, like I started edging towards less sweet cereals.
25:50
SPEAKER_02: And I'll tell you, right now, my favorite cereal, if I have to pick one, is Raisin Brand Crunch.
25:57
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, yeah.
25:58
SPEAKER_02: You've sung its praises.
25:59
SPEAKER_02: I've been singing its praises.
26:01
SPEAKER_02: I think it's fire.
26:02
SPEAKER_02: I also like the uh I don't remember Honey Bunches of Oats is pretty good.
26:07
SPEAKER_02: It's like they're they're sweet, but they're less sweet.
26:09
unknown: Yeah.
26:09
SPEAKER_02: I don't like the fucking You don't feel bad about eating.
26:11
SPEAKER_02: I'm not eating cornflakes.
26:13
SPEAKER_02: I'm not a fucking, you know, uh Mormon or some shit.
26:17
SPEAKER_00: I thought you were gonna say Jew.
26:19
SPEAKER_00: I'm not I'm not I don't wear a yarmulca.
26:22
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
26:23
SPEAKER_02: I I mean I'm trying not to in this situation.
26:26
SPEAKER_00: I guess like what would be the worst cereal to eat out of a fucking yarmulca?
26:30
SPEAKER_02: I mean, all of them, but I was just really getting on the topic of cereal, and I think why I think I don't buy cereal and eat it.
26:39
SPEAKER_02: I don't want to buy milk.
26:40
SPEAKER_02: Oh, yeah.
26:41
SPEAKER_02: I don't want to eat milk, I don't want milk.
26:43
SPEAKER_02: You're not a real American, I'm not a big milk guy.
26:46
SPEAKER_02: That's why.
26:46
SPEAKER_02: I was a milk guy growing up.
26:49
SPEAKER_02: After a certain age, I was just like, I'm done with this fucking white shit, dog.
26:53
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
26:54
SPEAKER_02: You know?
26:54
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
26:55
SPEAKER_02: It's it doesn't keep for very long.
26:57
SPEAKER_02: I don't even like buying shit that I gotta cook that requires milk.
27:01
SPEAKER_02: Because then it's like, yeah, hey, Walmart, can you just give me a half a cup of milk?
27:07
SPEAKER_02: Because that's all I fucking need.
27:09
SPEAKER_02: No.
27:10
SPEAKER_02: Oh, I have to buy a hundred and twenty-eight ounces of this shit at one time.
27:14
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
27:15
SPEAKER_00: Did you just get a tiny milk?
27:16
SPEAKER_00: There, they have them.
27:19
SPEAKER_00: Here's the problem with that.
27:20
SPEAKER_00: The little uh fucking, you know, one serving.
27:24
SPEAKER_02: You know, you know what the problem with that is?
27:25
SPEAKER_02: And this is what's fucked up is like I'm still I'm like a value guy.
27:29
SPEAKER_02: I'm a cheapskate.
27:31
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
27:31
SPEAKER_02: It's like two dollars for the tiny thing, or it's two fifty for the giant thing.
27:36
SPEAKER_02: I'm not gonna use the rest of it, but I feel like I'm getting fucking chipped.
27:42
SPEAKER_00: So I gotta buy the I I ruffle my yarmulk a bit and I uh maybe I am a Jew.
27:48
SPEAKER_00: I furl my brow and I I uh put my hand on my yamaka for a sec.
27:53
SPEAKER_02: I'm gonna put y'all on game real quick.
27:54
SPEAKER_02: If you're like me and you're like, there's sometimes I need milk, but most of the time I don't.
28:00
SPEAKER_02: I don't want to buy it, blah, blah, blah.
28:01
SPEAKER_02: I'm gonna put y'all motherfuckers on some game real quick.
28:04
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
28:05
SPEAKER_02: When you go to buy your milks, yeah, get the lactose-free milk.
28:10
SPEAKER_00: Absolutely.
28:11
SPEAKER_02: Even if you're not a uh lactose averse, here's why.
28:16
SPEAKER_02: Removal of the lactose increases the shelf stability of that milk by like a month, bro.
28:23
SPEAKER_02: Dead ass.
28:24
SPEAKER_02: Oh, yeah, for sure.
28:25
SPEAKER_02: I get the lactose-free milk.
28:26
SPEAKER_02: You buy the regular milk, it's like say it's June 1st.
28:29
SPEAKER_02: That shit's gonna say like June 18th or some shit.
28:33
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
28:33
SPEAKER_02: 19th, just for, you know.
28:35
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
28:35
SPEAKER_00: That's against support of the blacks.
28:37
SPEAKER_00: That's if you're cl that's if you're close to the fucking uh day that it got to wherever.
28:44
SPEAKER_00: You gotta talk to your spot.
28:45
SPEAKER_02: You had to reach your arm way back in the back and get the shit that was just delivered to you.
28:48
SPEAKER_00: That's what I'm saying.
28:49
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, that's like 19 days is a long time for milk.
28:53
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
28:54
SPEAKER_00: You're right.
28:54
SPEAKER_00: But your max.
28:55
SPEAKER_02: That's your max.
28:56
SPEAKER_02: Get the lactose free.
28:58
SPEAKER_02: That shit's gonna say like September 31st.
29:00
SPEAKER_02: I know, dude.
29:01
SPEAKER_02: That's not even a day that exists.
29:04
SPEAKER_02: That shit's gonna last you way longer than you need it to.
29:08
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
29:08
unknown: Yeah.
29:09
SPEAKER_02: It's I don't know what it is.
29:10
SPEAKER_02: I found it out one day.
29:12
SPEAKER_02: I just like randomly, maybe I ordered regular milk and they gave me lactose free, and I was like, holy shit, this shit is shelf staple for like two and a half months.
29:20
SPEAKER_02: I know, dude.
29:21
SPEAKER_02: I still didn't need to.
29:22
SPEAKER_02: Keep it in the fridge.
29:23
SPEAKER_02: But it it's I'm gonna I'm putting y'all on game.
29:27
SPEAKER_00: Dude, I've I uh have silk in my goddamn thing right now.
29:31
SPEAKER_00: My that's almond milk, isn't it?
29:33
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, so I guess it it uh but it's still longer than milk.
29:37
SPEAKER_00: For sure.
29:37
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, and it's it's still like it's like a month and a half or something.
29:40
SPEAKER_02: If if you don't need the properties of like cow's milk to because like a lot of the times when it's in cooking, it's because it like foams up or does whatever the magic of baking or some shit.
29:51
SPEAKER_00: I still use it though.
29:52
SPEAKER_02: And it works out?
29:54
SPEAKER_00: Uh for the shit I've used it for very occasionally.
29:57
SPEAKER_00: It doesn't like a cake one time it worked.
29:59
SPEAKER_02: Oh, okay.
29:59
SPEAKER_02: I was gonna say, like, if you're like making a sauce or something that calls for it, it's like it doesn't really make it creamy.
30:05
SPEAKER_02: Like it just more sort of makes it taste like almond.
30:08
SPEAKER_00: Oh, I put it in my fucking uh uh eggs.
30:11
SPEAKER_00: Okay.
30:12
SPEAKER_00: I've done that.
30:13
SPEAKER_00: I've used it for that, and it it's fine.
30:16
SPEAKER_00: They're a little weird, but it's fine.
30:18
SPEAKER_00: I'm gonna be honest, they're a tad weird.
30:20
SPEAKER_00: It is it is a it's a little more goopy than you would want.
30:25
SPEAKER_02: Uh I'm gonna be real, I don't like it.
30:28
SPEAKER_00: But it's i if you're doing sandwich eggs, it's perfect.
30:34
SPEAKER_00: It's fine because you're you're not worried as much about the texture of the eggs.
30:37
SPEAKER_00: But if you're actually just eating the eggs outright, you don't want to do almond milk with them.
30:43
SPEAKER_02: I get it's my turn to be real with you.
30:45
SPEAKER_02: Sure.
30:45
SPEAKER_02: I don't remember the last time I had an egg, dude.
30:48
SPEAKER_00: Really?
30:49
SPEAKER_00: I don't.
30:49
SPEAKER_00: That's one of my go-to's if I'm cooking for myself for like any reason.
30:53
SPEAKER_02: Talking about it is making me want an egg.
30:55
SPEAKER_02: You said on a sandwich egg, and I was like, man, I haven't had an egg sandwich in forever.
31:00
SPEAKER_02: Dude, they're good.
31:01
SPEAKER_02: Do a fried egg with some cheese.
31:04
SPEAKER_00: I don't even do that.
31:05
SPEAKER_02: Some miracle whip?
31:07
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I do a little whip.
31:08
SPEAKER_00: Dude.
31:09
SPEAKER_00: A little mayo.
31:10
SPEAKER_02: I kind of want to order like a half dozen eggs just to make two egg sandwiches and be done with it for another year.
31:16
SPEAKER_02: Nice.
31:17
SPEAKER_02: Hell yeah.
31:19
SPEAKER_00: Um so I'm thinking, I I thought about it, and you're gonna have fruity pebbles in the here's the thing.
31:28
SPEAKER_02: Shocker as it is, it's one of my faves.
31:31
SPEAKER_02: Really?
31:31
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I don't know why.
31:32
SPEAKER_02: I think it's because the flavor, not so much the sweetness.
31:35
SPEAKER_02: I like the fruity flavor.
31:36
SPEAKER_02: It is good, dude.
31:38
SPEAKER_02: I steer fruity more than I steer steer chocolate.
31:42
SPEAKER_00: We fucking know, dude.
31:43
SPEAKER_02: If I gotta vote for gays or blacks, I'm going pebbles over puffs.
31:48
SPEAKER_00: I'm going Pete Buttigieg over Kamala Hare.
31:51
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
31:52
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
31:53
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
31:54
SPEAKER_02: I don't know fuck all about that queer, but he ain't that bitch.
31:58
SPEAKER_02: Uh yeah.
31:59
SPEAKER_02: Oh, I know.
32:00
SPEAKER_00: I guess he would be slightly better if I'm being honest.
32:03
SPEAKER_00: Uh, but yeah, it's fruity pebbles because that's the most inconvenient cereal to finish.
32:09
SPEAKER_00: It's difficult to get done.
32:11
SPEAKER_02: That's true.
32:12
SPEAKER_00: It's a task by the time you've got 50 of them floating one by one in the fucking thing, and you're trying to scoop them together.
32:20
SPEAKER_00: You just have to drink the milk and then scoop them out after, and then drink a little milk after you eat them, you know?
32:26
SPEAKER_02: Right, right, right.
32:27
SPEAKER_00: Uh that's how you have to handle it.
32:29
SPEAKER_02: Okay.
32:29
SPEAKER_02: Fruity pebbles where I gotta wear that motherfucker forever?
32:32
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
32:33
SPEAKER_02: Nah.
32:33
SPEAKER_02: I'm eating the fucking Pebs, dude.
32:35
SPEAKER_00: Alright.
32:36
SPEAKER_00: Five five months out of the year.
32:39
SPEAKER_00: No, wait.
32:41
SPEAKER_00: Each summer, let's say, for five years.
32:44
SPEAKER_00: That's five years?
32:45
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, each summer for five years.
32:47
SPEAKER_00: So, like once a month for the summer when it's hot.
32:51
SPEAKER_00: Right.
32:51
SPEAKER_00: Cause who gives I guess I guess I could torture you with having to do it through the winter, but who cares?
32:56
SPEAKER_00: You know it's not that bad.
32:58
SPEAKER_00: There's some fucking snow.
33:00
SPEAKER_00: The summer's the worst.
33:01
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I mean, it's just what does he do?
33:03
SPEAKER_00: A homeless guy?
33:04
SPEAKER_00: What do they do with their yarmika?
33:06
SPEAKER_00: Like the thing is, like I homeless Jewish guy, that's a f whoa, that doesn't happen.
33:13
SPEAKER_02: I can get through just about anything.
33:15
SPEAKER_02: You know what I'm saying?
33:16
SPEAKER_02: Like, there's situations I don't I don't want to deal with all the time.
33:21
SPEAKER_02: And you just fucking get over it, get through it, move on.
33:25
SPEAKER_02: Because then you don't have to deal with it later.
33:26
SPEAKER_02: Right.
33:27
SPEAKER_02: Once it's done, it's done.
33:28
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
33:29
SPEAKER_02: But the annoyance of having to fucking deal with that stupid gay little hat all the time, all the time, yeah, it would drive me.
33:37
SPEAKER_02: I I would probably kill myself legitimately.
33:40
SPEAKER_02: Because I would just go insane.
33:42
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
33:42
SPEAKER_02: It's like Chinese water torture level after a while of having to deal with that shit.
33:49
SPEAKER_02: I feel like I'd have to shave my fucking head.
33:53
SPEAKER_00: And be very anti-Jew at the same time.
33:55
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I would I would get a Nazi tattoo right next to it.
33:59
SPEAKER_02: Be like, I'm trying to be, I'm trying to, it's a yin-yang thing.
34:02
SPEAKER_02: You guys don't get it?
34:03
SPEAKER_02: Like, come on, I'm trying to fucking I'm covering all my bases here.
34:06
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, yeah.
34:08
SPEAKER_00: 88 or whatever they say.
34:10
SPEAKER_00: I don't know.
34:10
SPEAKER_00: I don't know.
34:11
SPEAKER_00: Isn't that one of them?
34:12
SPEAKER_02: 1379 or some shit.
34:14
SPEAKER_02: Whatever the fuck they say.
34:15
SPEAKER_00: H H or whatever.
34:16
SPEAKER_00: The HH button, as Mitch Hedberg put it.
34:18
SPEAKER_02: You know, if they really wanted to be like Hitler, they'd all become vegetarians.
34:22
SPEAKER_02: And I think that would be dedication and fucking hilarious.
34:27
SPEAKER_00: It would be very funny.
34:28
SPEAKER_02: If you want to join our group, you have to hate the blacks, hate the Jews, and only eat vegetables.
34:34
SPEAKER_00: Vegetarian white supremacists.
34:35
SPEAKER_01: Eat your broccoli if you want to feel the real hate.
34:38
SPEAKER_00: Isn't it funny that like white supremacists in America, like traditionally, were so very against black people and Jewish people mainly.
34:48
SPEAKER_00: Like that was the the most highly publicized of their hate, right?
34:53
SPEAKER_00: And they but they like they make up what?
34:57
SPEAKER_00: Even combined, they make up 15% of the population or something?
35:02
SPEAKER_00: Like and then fucking dude.
35:06
SPEAKER_00: Uh Hispanic people far outpopulate them.
35:11
SPEAKER_00: Well they hate them too.
35:13
SPEAKER_00: They do, but like, why aren't they throwing more of their ire at well, I guess they are now, at Hispanic and Muslim people because they are have the numbers and and Asians, Asians have the fucking numbers, dude.
35:26
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
35:27
SPEAKER_02: I mean, I'm not gonna pretend to understand the mind of a bigot, but uh my guess would be black crime and Jew banks.
35:37
SPEAKER_02: That would just be my guess.
35:39
SPEAKER_00: I guess they're hitting the Hispanic people where they can with ice and with the, you know, uh, yeah, with the the the the border stuff.
35:48
SPEAKER_00: And you know, hitting the Muslims where they can with, you know, various regime change wars.
35:54
SPEAKER_02: Um yeah, you know, they're fighting they're fighting the fight.
35:58
SPEAKER_02: I'm not gonna call it the good fight.
36:00
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
36:01
SPEAKER_00: They're just fighting.
36:02
SPEAKER_00: They are fighting a fight.
36:03
SPEAKER_02: There's just a lot of fighting happening.
36:05
SPEAKER_02: It's a lot.
36:06
SPEAKER_02: And uh honestly, I'm scared.
36:08
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
36:08
SPEAKER_02: And uh I want it to stop.
36:11
SPEAKER_02: But I'm not the boss.
36:12
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
36:13
SPEAKER_02: You know what?
36:14
SPEAKER_02: Do whatever you want.
36:15
SPEAKER_02: Just whatever whatever you guys think is cool.
36:17
SPEAKER_00: I mean, don't be a white supremacist, but like I can't stop you from doing that.
36:21
SPEAKER_02: Right.
36:22
SPEAKER_02: The First Amendment or something.
36:24
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I mean, if you're gonna be a dumbass.
36:27
SPEAKER_02: Oh, my God, how did I forget to bring this up to you, Jake?
36:32
SPEAKER_02: Did you see this fucking this guy, this judge feller, or this group of judges?
36:36
SPEAKER_02: I don't really know.
36:37
SPEAKER_02: I'm not that involved.
36:38
SPEAKER_02: Okay.
36:39
SPEAKER_02: Something something ruled that AI generated child pornography is covered under the First Amendment.
36:48
SPEAKER_00: I think I did see that.
36:50
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
36:50
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
36:51
SPEAKER_02: What the fuck?
36:53
SPEAKER_02: That's nuts, dude.
36:54
SPEAKER_02: And here's my response.
36:56
SPEAKER_02: I would like to exercise my First Amendment right and say that I think that the judges that ruled that that is un is covered under the First Amendment should have their cock and balls cut off and hung from a tree.
37:12
SPEAKER_02: Subpoena their phones, dude.
37:14
SPEAKER_02: That's I'm not saying go do that.
37:15
SPEAKER_02: I'm not inciting violence.
37:17
SPEAKER_02: I'm just saying that they should die a horrific death.
37:22
SPEAKER_02: Here's why.
37:23
SPEAKER_02: Not well, I mean, obviously why, but here's here's a reason why that's turbo fucked up.
37:29
SPEAKER_02: Not just regular mega fucked up, it's turbo fucked up.
37:33
SPEAKER_02: Because why do you think AI knows what children look like?
37:40
SPEAKER_02: Right.
37:41
SPEAKER_02: Period.
37:41
SPEAKER_02: Not even just naked, but like why do you think AI knows what children look like?
37:47
SPEAKER_02: Right.
37:47
SPEAKER_02: Did it just conjure that up out of its imagination?
37:51
SPEAKER_02: Well, it doesn't have an imagination, it has training data.
37:56
SPEAKER_02: So AI has been scraping your kids' Facebook or your fucking TikToks and this and that, the fucking home alone and such of the world.
38:07
SPEAKER_02: So it's building photographs and videos of naked children based on real people.
38:16
SPEAKER_02: Ew.
38:17
SPEAKER_02: Of course, yeah.
38:19
SPEAKER_02: So no, it's not the first amendment at all.
38:24
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, no.
38:26
SPEAKER_02: That's yeah.
38:27
SPEAKER_02: Therefore, fuck you.
38:28
SPEAKER_02: Also, you can't you can't have it both ways because it is also illegal to make fucking AI porn of people, right?
38:37
SPEAKER_00: Of real people, yeah.
38:39
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
38:40
SPEAKER_00: So of specific individuals.
38:42
SPEAKER_02: That's what's happening, whether you fucking know it or not.
38:45
SPEAKER_02: Oh, well, yeah.
38:46
SPEAKER_02: AI, I mean, that's gotta be lighting up the websites, right?
38:51
SPEAKER_02: It's so brain dead I don't have the words to describe it.
38:54
SPEAKER_00: It's like duh duh.
38:57
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
38:58
SPEAKER_00: That's gotta be lighting up all the all the porn aggregate websites, right?
39:02
SPEAKER_00: Like AI porn has to be just fucking populating those motherfuckers.
39:06
SPEAKER_02: Every time so I go to the, you know, the hubs and the such, all the ads are like, oh right, come fuck your AI girlfriend and all that shit.
39:13
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, yeah.
39:14
SPEAKER_01: And I'm just like, makes sense, just get to the Latina anal.
39:17
SPEAKER_01: What are you doing?
39:18
SPEAKER_01: The latanal, dude?
39:20
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, dude.
39:21
SPEAKER_01: The lapainal.
39:23
SPEAKER_02: I actually don't like the pain aspect of it.
39:25
SPEAKER_02: I like it when they're cons like enthusiastic about getting butt fucked.
39:30
SPEAKER_00: You like a tortured torta?
39:31
SPEAKER_00: Is that what you're in the theater?
39:33
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
39:34
SPEAKER_00: Yes.
39:35
SPEAKER_00: I uh that's what it sounded like.
39:38
SPEAKER_00: I just made the word connection.
39:40
SPEAKER_02: I just picked two popular categories.
39:41
SPEAKER_02: I usually just watch whatever.
39:44
SPEAKER_02: Um I'm not really in a category these days.
39:47
SPEAKER_02: Just like that girl's hot.
39:48
SPEAKER_02: Uh I jack off like twice a week right now, if that, so it doesn't matter.
39:53
SPEAKER_02: Okay.
39:54
SPEAKER_02: Just get it over with so I can go to sleep.
39:56
SPEAKER_00: Get this out of me.
39:57
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
39:58
SPEAKER_02: I got poison in my balls.
40:00
SPEAKER_02: Get it out.
40:01
SPEAKER_02: Get it out, Lord.
40:03
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
40:04
SPEAKER_02: What is it?
40:05
SPEAKER_02: The cereal?
40:05
SPEAKER_02: That was the thing?
40:06
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I'm gonna eat the cereal because I can just get through it.
40:09
SPEAKER_02: Okay.
40:10
SPEAKER_02: The thing, oh yeah.
40:11
SPEAKER_00: I would die.
40:12
SPEAKER_00: Like four times basically every summer for five years.
40:16
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, yeah.
40:17
SPEAKER_00: So 20 times.
40:18
SPEAKER_02: I've eaten like hot dogs from fucking the gas station.
40:22
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, that's true, yeah.
40:23
SPEAKER_02: What's worse?
40:24
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, burritos and shit from the gas station.
40:26
SPEAKER_02: At least pretty bugs, whatever this is, like, you know.
40:29
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
40:30
SPEAKER_00: It's a controlled food.
40:32
SPEAKER_00: Like you know what's in it.
40:33
SPEAKER_00: It's yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
40:35
SPEAKER_02: There's gonna be like some bugs and stuff in it, but it's like eat a hot dog ever.
40:41
SPEAKER_02: There's more bugs than that.
40:42
SPEAKER_02: Probably than the full entire bug you just ate.
40:45
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, true.
40:45
SPEAKER_00: The mites that grow on his that like live in his hair.
40:49
SPEAKER_00: That's what's gonna be in there.
40:50
SPEAKER_02: Sure, there's gonna be lice and shit in there, it's fine.
40:52
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
40:54
SPEAKER_00: You'll lice in your mustache and shit.
40:56
SPEAKER_02: Here's the question.
40:57
SPEAKER_02: And I know the answer, but I want to say it anyway.
41:00
SPEAKER_02: If he's got like fleas and shit, and they got his AIDS blood in his blood.
41:05
SPEAKER_00: Oh, and they bite you or you eat 'em.
41:08
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, dude, fuck.
41:09
SPEAKER_02: I think it's been proven that like mosquitoes suck more blood than than uh fleas.
41:14
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
41:15
SPEAKER_02: And it's been proven that it can't be passed through mosquitoes.
41:18
SPEAKER_02: Really?
41:19
SPEAKER_02: I think so.
41:20
SPEAKER_00: AIDS?
41:22
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
41:22
SPEAKER_00: Can't be passed through mosquitoes?
41:24
SPEAKER_00: I think it can.
41:25
SPEAKER_00: It's not enough blood?
41:26
SPEAKER_00: I don't think so.
41:27
SPEAKER_00: Not that much blood.
41:28
SPEAKER_02: I mean it's enough that when you smack a fucking juicer, yeah, I know.
41:32
SPEAKER_00: That seems like a lot of blood.
41:34
SPEAKER_00: That I would not want that much AIDS blood in me.
41:36
SPEAKER_00: I tell you that.
41:38
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
41:38
SPEAKER_00: You'd get a little nervous.
41:39
SPEAKER_00: I would I would have a major problem.
41:41
SPEAKER_00: I would be getting tests every day twice.
41:44
SPEAKER_02: I feel like it's been proven.
41:46
SPEAKER_02: Six months.
41:46
SPEAKER_02: But I'm not science man.
41:48
SPEAKER_02: I gotta ask a science man.
41:51
SPEAKER_00: God damn.
41:52
SPEAKER_00: Well, yeah.
41:54
SPEAKER_00: Sorry, guys.
41:55
SPEAKER_00: I do not have an awesome Pokemon parody this week.
41:59
SPEAKER_00: It takes a bit for me to load one up.
42:02
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, you gotta lock and load.
42:04
SPEAKER_00: But it is approaching.
42:05
SPEAKER_00: I'll figure one out again.
42:06
SPEAKER_02: We do have an idea for a song, and I'm not making any promises, guys.
42:10
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
42:11
SPEAKER_02: But we might have a little something something for you next week.
42:14
SPEAKER_02: Maybe.
42:15
SPEAKER_02: Because that would be the timing, right?
42:17
SPEAKER_00: It would be.
42:18
SPEAKER_00: It would be perfect timing.
42:19
SPEAKER_00: Right.
42:19
SPEAKER_00: So you might already know if you're a longtime listener.
42:22
SPEAKER_02: If you're savvy.
42:23
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
42:24
SPEAKER_02: But no promises, but we have an idea for it, and it m the juices might get flowing one day.
42:30
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
42:31
SPEAKER_02: And we might bust it out and blow your fucking dick from the dirt.
42:34
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
42:35
SPEAKER_02: But until then, all I got for you is another segment, and then we're gonna get the heck out of here.
42:41
SPEAKER_00: Ladies and gentlemen, here's Tyler's top 10 list.
42:44
SPEAKER_00: Let's go.
42:45
SPEAKER_02: Yes.
42:47
SPEAKER_02: Yes.
42:48
SPEAKER_02: It's that one.
42:50
SPEAKER_02: You already knew it was coming, you fools.
42:53
SPEAKER_02: Uh, I got, you know, the standard two good bad scenario, flip floppity dip dot.
43:01
SPEAKER_02: First one, my top five worst smells, dude.
43:06
SPEAKER_00: Oh, okay.
43:08
SPEAKER_02: I just it hit me the other day.
43:10
SPEAKER_02: I was in a situation, a little fucking wafteroo came my way, and I was like, I hate that more than just about any other smell in the world.
43:18
SPEAKER_00: Okay.
43:19
SPEAKER_02: And I was like, I've never done a top list of shitty things to smell.
43:23
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
43:23
SPEAKER_00: We've done a lot of other senses, but not not the smelling.
43:26
SPEAKER_00: Facts.
43:27
SPEAKER_02: Number five.
43:29
SPEAKER_02: You know how it is.
43:30
SPEAKER_02: Number five's always kind of right in there.
43:32
SPEAKER_02: You know, you know what it is, bro.
43:34
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
43:35
SPEAKER_02: My farts.
43:36
SPEAKER_02: I'll admit it.
43:37
SPEAKER_02: They're pretty bad.
43:38
SPEAKER_02: I can fucking drown a toddler in gases, bro.
43:43
SPEAKER_02: They'll die.
43:44
SPEAKER_02: Maybe one with a yarmulka.
43:45
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
43:46
SPEAKER_02: Maybe.
43:47
SPEAKER_00: Gas chamber that motherfucker.
43:49
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, dude.
43:50
SPEAKER_02: You never know.
43:51
SPEAKER_02: I feel like if there's been times where I feel like if I had ripped the fart that I had ripped near a girl that was into me, she might.
44:00
SPEAKER_02: Might not be no more.
44:01
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
44:02
SPEAKER_02: You know?
44:03
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
44:04
SPEAKER_02: I have a funny anecdote about a fart that I ripped semi-recently that I've forgotten to tell you, but I can't tell you on the main show.
44:13
SPEAKER_02: Hopefully one day I'll remember to tell you on the$10, but it's very funny.
44:17
SPEAKER_02: Uh yeah, my farts.
44:19
SPEAKER_02: Don't like them.
44:20
SPEAKER_02: I don't like them.
44:21
SPEAKER_02: I feel bad even worse for people around me because I know your own brand is not as bad for yourself.
44:26
SPEAKER_02: Right.
44:26
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
44:27
SPEAKER_02: It's gotta be worse.
44:28
SPEAKER_00: Your nose blind to it.
44:29
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
44:30
SPEAKER_02: Uh number four.
44:32
SPEAKER_02: Dude, fucking old people.
44:36
SPEAKER_02: Oh yeah.
44:37
SPEAKER_02: Oh my God.
44:38
SPEAKER_02: Pretty bad.
44:39
SPEAKER_02: Nothing says bad day, like being reminded of mortality of the human condition.
44:45
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
44:46
SPEAKER_02: Like they fucking stink, number one.
44:49
SPEAKER_02: Number two, not their fault.
44:51
SPEAKER_02: Number three, it's because they're rotting from the inside out.
44:57
SPEAKER_02: And that's icky and it's scary at the same time.
45:01
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, your nose is like a primitive sense, you know?
45:04
SPEAKER_00: So having that primitive sense of death, yeah, not good.
45:08
SPEAKER_02: It's danger.
45:09
SPEAKER_02: And it I hate it.
45:11
SPEAKER_02: I hate being around old people, and a big part of it is the smell, but another big part of it is also every single thing about them, also.
45:21
SPEAKER_02: The other four senses as well.
45:23
SPEAKER_02: Every single thing about them.
45:24
SPEAKER_02: I hate it.
45:24
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, yeah.
45:25
SPEAKER_02: Uh number three.
45:29
SPEAKER_02: There's some people out there that are gonna hear this and they're gonna do this.
45:34
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
45:35
SPEAKER_02: This this motherfucker's spitting facts.
45:38
SPEAKER_02: You ready for this one?
45:39
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
45:39
SPEAKER_02: Number three, Terre Haute, Indiana.
45:45
SPEAKER_02: The whole city fucking stinks, dude.
45:50
SPEAKER_02: It reeks.
45:52
SPEAKER_03: Oh my god.
45:53
SPEAKER_02: Terre Haute fucking smells bad.
45:57
SPEAKER_00: Put them on blast, dude.
45:59
SPEAKER_02: Go there.
45:59
SPEAKER_02: If you've never been there, if you're anywhere even close, take a day trip, dude.
46:02
SPEAKER_02: Go get a bagel or something.
46:04
SPEAKER_02: If they got a place called Square Donuts.
46:07
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, maybe bagels.
46:08
SPEAKER_00: Maybe with a guy with a yarmulke.
46:10
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
46:11
SPEAKER_02: Dude, especially the south side.
46:13
SPEAKER_02: But the whole city, it wafts around.
46:16
SPEAKER_02: It just floats around.
46:17
SPEAKER_02: It's stuck to the people and they fucking mingle and shit.
46:21
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
46:21
SPEAKER_02: Oh, it's horrific.
46:23
SPEAKER_02: It's the stinkiest city I've ever been to.
46:25
SPEAKER_02: And I've been there a hundred times, and every time I'm like, Yeah.
46:28
SPEAKER_02: TH and that scope.
46:30
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
46:31
SPEAKER_02: Uh, number two, this is the one that made me think of the thing.
46:34
SPEAKER_00: Okay.
46:35
SPEAKER_00: I was you thought of one worse.
46:37
SPEAKER_02: I was doing a chore.
46:38
SPEAKER_00: Okay.
46:39
SPEAKER_02: Mm-hmm.
46:41
SPEAKER_02: Cat piss.
46:42
SPEAKER_00: Oh.
46:44
SPEAKER_00: Dude.
46:45
SPEAKER_02: It's it's fucking ranked.
46:47
SPEAKER_02: It triggers some sort of like fight or flight mode for me, dude.
46:52
SPEAKER_02: I start swinging on a litter box, bro.
46:55
SPEAKER_02: I'm ready to stomp a fucking pussy cat out when I smell that fucking piss, bro.
47:00
SPEAKER_02: It's horrific.
47:01
SPEAKER_02: And it like it smells like you are in danger.
47:04
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
47:05
SPEAKER_02: It it sucks.
47:06
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
47:07
SPEAKER_02: Cleaning out a litter box is the by far the worst thing about owning a cat.
47:12
SPEAKER_02: And it's not all sunshine and rainbows.
47:14
SPEAKER_02: There's other bad stuff too.
47:15
SPEAKER_02: Claws and this and that.
47:18
SPEAKER_02: Fucking the piss, dude.
47:20
SPEAKER_02: I'd rather smell dog shit, cat shit, human shit, bird shit, all that shit.
47:24
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
47:24
SPEAKER_02: Than cat piss.
47:26
SPEAKER_00: Isn't that funny?
47:26
SPEAKER_00: Dog piss doesn't do that.
47:28
SPEAKER_00: Dog piss is like human piss.
47:30
SPEAKER_00: It's fine.
47:31
SPEAKER_00: But uh cat piss is so fucking rank.
47:34
SPEAKER_00: It's got an extra chemical in it.
47:36
SPEAKER_02: Something about it's ammonia, but yeah, it's something about their kidneys.
47:40
SPEAKER_02: Just processes shit garbagely.
47:43
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
47:44
SPEAKER_02: I don't know.
47:44
SPEAKER_02: They're not from America.
47:45
SPEAKER_02: They're not from the uh earth or something.
47:47
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, they're aliens.
47:48
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
47:49
SPEAKER_02: Number one should be obvious to anyone who's ever listened to this show, to anyone that knows my personality, that knows the things I hate the most in the world.
47:57
SPEAKER_02: It's come on, guys, keep your fucking spices over there.
48:03
SPEAKER_02: Indian people.
48:06
SPEAKER_02: Ew.
48:08
SPEAKER_02: Golly, why does the whole entire group of people have to stink so bad all the time?
48:16
SPEAKER_02: They I've never had a situation where like everything about an Indian interaction was great.
48:24
SPEAKER_02: Like, even the they're cool, like we had a good conversation.
48:27
SPEAKER_02: I walk away going, I'm gonna have to take a shower.
48:31
SPEAKER_02: Oh man.
48:33
SPEAKER_02: They stink, bro.
48:34
SPEAKER_02: It's not their fault.
48:35
SPEAKER_02: It's also not my fault.
48:37
SPEAKER_02: It's just it is what it is.
48:39
SPEAKER_00: Okay.
48:39
SPEAKER_02: Alright.
48:40
SPEAKER_02: That's that's my top five worst smells.
48:43
SPEAKER_02: Top five best smells, obviously.
48:45
SPEAKER_02: But this isn't like conventional best smells.
48:47
SPEAKER_02: This isn't like, oh, a fucking summer breeze or fucking lavender or whatever.
48:54
SPEAKER_02: This is just like, you know, unconventional best smells, I guess, would be like the thing.
49:00
SPEAKER_02: Number five, it almost never fails.
49:03
SPEAKER_02: Like this is when I say it, y'all are gonna know exactly what I'm talking about.
49:07
SPEAKER_02: Okay.
49:08
SPEAKER_02: Black dudes.
49:09
SPEAKER_02: Oh, absolutely.
49:10
SPEAKER_02: Dude, they always every time their scent shit is it's always on point, bro.
49:15
SPEAKER_02: They got the clone or the fucking deodorant always on point.
49:18
SPEAKER_02: They don't want to fucking stink.
49:21
SPEAKER_01: Take notes, engines.
49:24
SPEAKER_00: It's not that hard.
49:26
SPEAKER_00: They always smell great.
49:27
SPEAKER_00: Black dudes are like every time.
49:30
SPEAKER_00: They got it figured out.
49:31
SPEAKER_00: Without fail.
49:31
SPEAKER_00: I don't I've never smelled a black dude that stunk.
49:34
SPEAKER_00: Not once.
49:34
SPEAKER_00: That's what I'm saying, bro.
49:36
SPEAKER_00: I don't understand why that's a racist trope.
49:38
SPEAKER_00: Black people do not stink.
49:40
SPEAKER_00: I don't think it is a racist trope.
49:41
SPEAKER_00: No, that they stink?
49:42
SPEAKER_00: It's for sure.
49:44
SPEAKER_02: Oh, that, yeah.
49:44
SPEAKER_02: I thought you meant to say that they smell good is a kind of like they say like saying black dudes run fast.
49:50
SPEAKER_02: Oh, yeah.
49:51
SPEAKER_02: It's a compliment, but it's also racist kind of deal.
49:53
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, yeah.
49:54
SPEAKER_00: No, I just mean I think I think as a culture, they have figured it out on that front.
49:59
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
50:00
SPEAKER_00: And and white people need to catch up on that as well.
50:02
SPEAKER_00: I mean, I would go that far.
50:04
SPEAKER_02: I feel like the racist trope of the stinky black guy probably comes from back when they weren't allowed to shower.
50:09
SPEAKER_02: True, true, true.
50:10
SPEAKER_02: Probably.
50:11
SPEAKER_02: They worked outside all day and they're caked in fucking sweat and stinky.
50:15
SPEAKER_00: Look at look at uh your racist trope is not true because when they have access to fucking toiletries, they use them.
50:23
SPEAKER_02: Oh, yeah.
50:24
SPEAKER_02: They be bathing in them.
50:26
SPEAKER_00: So fucking checkmate racists.
50:30
SPEAKER_00: Take that.
50:31
SPEAKER_00: Pecker wood.
50:33
SPEAKER_02: Underutilized.
50:34
SPEAKER_00: Fucking cracker pieces of shit.
50:38
SPEAKER_02: Uh yeah.
50:39
SPEAKER_02: So number five black teas.
50:40
SPEAKER_02: Number four.
50:41
SPEAKER_02: Uh-huh.
50:43
SPEAKER_02: Fresh, brand new, out the box kicks, dude.
50:47
SPEAKER_02: Oh yeah.
50:47
SPEAKER_02: Brand new shoes.
50:48
SPEAKER_02: Sure, dude.
50:49
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
50:49
SPEAKER_02: They got a nice little fuck, just a nice little, it makes you feel good.
50:53
SPEAKER_02: It's not like a, oh man, that smells so fucking great.
50:56
SPEAKER_02: It's like, I got, it's just it it perks you up a little bit.
51:00
SPEAKER_02: It's like, I got a brand new pair of kicks, dude, and they smell like nice and new.
51:04
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
51:04
SPEAKER_02: Plus, you know, feet usually don't smell good.
51:07
SPEAKER_02: So like a foot associated item smelling great.
51:09
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
51:10
SPEAKER_00: True, true.
51:10
SPEAKER_00: Bonus points.
51:11
SPEAKER_00: That's probably why it sticks out more than like new car smell.
51:14
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
51:14
SPEAKER_02: Or whatever.
51:15
SPEAKER_02: I've never understood that because I don't it smells like chemicals to me.
51:18
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, it smells a little too much like cleaner.
51:21
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
51:21
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
51:21
SPEAKER_00: Plastic and like that's what you're smelling in the shoes, too, basically, probably.
51:26
SPEAKER_00: Probably, but it's for some reason it works.
51:28
SPEAKER_00: It's really nice.
51:29
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
51:29
SPEAKER_00: It's something I mean, leather too.
51:31
SPEAKER_02: The vulcanization of rubber of some sort maybe causes it.
51:35
SPEAKER_00: I don't know.
51:36
SPEAKER_00: Maybe.
51:36
SPEAKER_00: I thought about getting if they ever re-release uh the franchises, the Steve Francis shoes that I've always talked about being nostalgic for.
51:46
SPEAKER_00: If they release those, I would want to get a pair just for nostalgia's sake.
51:50
SPEAKER_00: But it's like not the same as playing Pokemon or some other nostalgia bait thing.
51:56
SPEAKER_00: It's I gotta go outside in these fucking shoes, and I'm like, is somebody gonna be like, look at this fucking dumb wigger over here, you know?
52:05
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, because I have on fucking gaudy Nike shoes.
52:09
SPEAKER_02: Can you imagine you get those and you're like so stoked about them?
52:12
SPEAKER_02: And then like you're like, I'm ready to show them off to the world.
52:15
SPEAKER_02: And so dude's like, hmm, we're living your teen years, huh?
52:19
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, yeah.
52:20
SPEAKER_00: Why don't you get a Fubu jersey, dude?
52:22
SPEAKER_02: Cutting you off at the fucking knees, dude.
52:24
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
52:25
SPEAKER_02: That's always a bummer.
52:26
SPEAKER_00: And I would have on a Raiders jersey at the same time.
52:29
SPEAKER_00: So I would look so wigged out.
52:31
SPEAKER_02: Oh man, I would come up to you and I'd be like, what's up, SA?
52:35
SPEAKER_02: The fuck?
52:38
SPEAKER_00: You uh you're gonna enjoy your shift at on the fucking taco truck later, bitch.
52:43
SPEAKER_02: Hey, I mean, roof inspection.
52:47
SPEAKER_00: I got some twigs up there or some shit, Holmes.
52:49
SPEAKER_00: Or why I saw a guy in a MAGA hat over there.
52:51
SPEAKER_00: Watch out for ice.
52:52
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, keep an eye out.
52:54
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
52:54
SPEAKER_02: Uh number three.
52:57
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
52:58
SPEAKER_02: Top five uh unconventional good smells.
53:02
SPEAKER_02: This one's a little long.
53:03
SPEAKER_02: Bear with me.
53:04
SPEAKER_02: A chick's underboob sweat if she's showered recently.
53:08
SPEAKER_02: If she has.
53:09
SPEAKER_02: She showered like three hours ago, and then you get out in the car.
53:14
SPEAKER_02: Okay, you know, you take a little fucking credit card swipe underneath and give it a give it the old superstar treatment.
53:21
SPEAKER_02: You know?
53:21
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
53:22
SPEAKER_00: Sure.
53:22
SPEAKER_02: It's pleasant.
53:23
SPEAKER_02: Okay.
53:24
SPEAKER_02: Something about it.
53:25
SPEAKER_02: Maybe it's just like a brain association.
53:27
SPEAKER_02: No, it is.
53:28
SPEAKER_02: I just boob.
53:29
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
53:29
SPEAKER_00: No, yeah.
53:30
SPEAKER_00: I enjoy it.
53:31
SPEAKER_00: I I enjoy even when not showered.
53:34
SPEAKER_02: I don't think, you know, I don't think I've ever It just depends on how long recently it doesn't mean like five minutes ago.
53:41
SPEAKER_00: I don't I think it's I think because of the phenomenon you're talking that you brought up about that it's boobs.
53:47
SPEAKER_00: Right.
53:48
SPEAKER_00: So anything about them is sick.
53:49
SPEAKER_00: True, true, true.
53:50
SPEAKER_00: Then like even the even B O of boobs, which is the first two letters, and that's funny.
53:57
SPEAKER_00: Uh but even the B of B O O Bs is fine.
54:00
SPEAKER_00: Then it would be boob odor, not body odor.
54:03
SPEAKER_00: Uh, but yeah, the it's uh no problems.
54:08
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
54:08
SPEAKER_00: Like I'm I'm sure other other things I would not be as you know keen on.
54:15
SPEAKER_00: Other like places where like sweat gets stuck, you know?
54:19
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
54:19
SPEAKER_02: You would think proximity to pit, it would be worse, but it's like it's never like unpleasant.
54:24
SPEAKER_00: No, it's always it's all good, dude.
54:27
SPEAKER_00: It's all good.
54:27
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, tit sweat's fine, dude.
54:29
SPEAKER_00: It's breezy.
54:29
SPEAKER_00: That's fantastic.
54:30
SPEAKER_02: It's nice, unconventional.
54:32
SPEAKER_02: Uh, number two, I don't know why this is on here.
54:35
SPEAKER_02: I think I just couldn't think of anything, but I will say put it at number two.
54:41
SPEAKER_02: I mean, like, objectively, it is better than the other ones.
54:44
SPEAKER_02: Oh, okay, okay.
54:45
SPEAKER_02: But it's like not that unconventional.
54:46
SPEAKER_02: Here's here's why it's on here, I think.
54:48
SPEAKER_02: It's because there's a lot of good smells out there like that make you happy or like it, you know, some sort of positivity around it.
54:58
SPEAKER_02: Freshly baked bread or fucking lilacs or whatever.
55:01
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
55:02
SPEAKER_02: But when you have a long hard day and you're beat ass fucking tired, and you lay down in bed and you pull that blankie up over you, and you got freshly cleaned bedding sheets and blanks.
55:17
SPEAKER_02: When it smells nice, it puts you at such like you can fall asleep so much easier, I feel like.
55:23
SPEAKER_02: And it's like you get into a stinky bed after a long day.
55:27
SPEAKER_02: It's like more bullshit.
55:29
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
55:29
SPEAKER_02: And you're gonna you're gonna have bad dreams.
55:31
SPEAKER_02: You fucking crawl into that smelly goody ass bed, dude.
55:35
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, you're on cloud fucking nine, bro.
55:37
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, you're all these list items are perfect.
55:41
SPEAKER_02: I I think I do a good job of justifying my trust.
55:45
SPEAKER_00: On this one specifically, like they're hitting home for me.
55:48
SPEAKER_00: I was like crossfaded at the fart house one time, and I had recently washed my blanket.
55:55
SPEAKER_00: It was like not long after moving in.
55:57
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
55:57
SPEAKER_00: And I had recently washed my blanket and I pulled it over myself and I was crossfaded, and it kind of helped a little.
56:04
SPEAKER_00: Like I was like back to earth a little bit.
56:06
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, it's like it's I don't know.
56:08
SPEAKER_02: Because bed is such an important place.
56:10
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
56:11
SPEAKER_02: It's a third of your life, yada yada yada, but also like sort of like a safe place to kind of relax.
56:18
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
56:18
SPEAKER_02: You know, you shut your door, there's no none of the noise of the world, there's no concern about like social convention or any of that shit.
56:26
SPEAKER_02: Like you can just be beat.
56:28
SPEAKER_02: You can just be in bed.
56:30
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
56:30
SPEAKER_02: And when it smells nice, dude, a nice detergent, a little fucking fabric softener up in that bitch, dude.
56:39
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
56:40
SPEAKER_02: It's important.
56:41
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
56:42
SPEAKER_02: Wash your fucking sheets, you nasty bastards.
56:45
SPEAKER_02: Uh and then number one, I mean, let's be real.
56:49
SPEAKER_02: Above all those other things, the most important thing.
56:54
SPEAKER_02: Catch a good catch a good little whiff, dude.
56:57
SPEAKER_02: When you're fucking rocked up some good snatch, brother.
57:03
SPEAKER_01: I figured this would be nice.
57:05
SPEAKER_01: When you're fucking rocked up, dude untouchable.
57:12
SPEAKER_01: There ain't nothing coming close to a nice fucking little piece of that pie.
57:19
SPEAKER_01: When you're fucking bricked up.
57:22
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
57:23
SPEAKER_02: That's all there is to it.
57:24
SPEAKER_02: Not debatable.
57:26
SPEAKER_02: It's biological.
57:27
SPEAKER_02: Ladies, you agree.
57:28
SPEAKER_02: Don't even talk.
57:30
SPEAKER_02: Comments, not happening.
57:31
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
57:32
SPEAKER_00: Oh yeah.
57:32
SPEAKER_00: Speaking of comments.
57:33
SPEAKER_00: Oh, yeah.
57:35
SPEAKER_00: Let's let's see.
57:36
SPEAKER_00: Let's just see what's gonna happen.
57:38
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
57:39
SPEAKER_00: Let's see what's up there.
57:40
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I agree.
57:41
SPEAKER_00: I agree with everything on your list, man.
57:42
SPEAKER_00: Good.
57:43
SPEAKER_00: It's hard not to when a boy's spitting fecks and shit.
57:48
SPEAKER_00: Alright.
57:48
SPEAKER_00: There goes the neighborhood.
57:50
SPEAKER_00: Still comment lists.
57:51
SPEAKER_00: Bitches.
57:53
SPEAKER_00: Zero Dark Squirtie.
57:55
SPEAKER_00: We got comments.
57:56
SPEAKER_00: Oh, let's fucking go.
57:58
SPEAKER_00: All right.
57:59
SPEAKER_00: Uh Edrod said, no episode this week.
58:03
SPEAKER_00: You Jive Turkeys are gonna force me to sign up to the Patreon.
58:08
SPEAKER_02: So I'll speak on that a little bit.
58:10
SPEAKER_02: Okay.
58:11
SPEAKER_00: Okay, okay.
58:12
SPEAKER_02: I did all the work.
58:13
SPEAKER_02: I uploaded the Patreon episodes.
58:15
SPEAKER_02: I did everything.
58:15
SPEAKER_02: I got all the way to the finish line.
58:18
SPEAKER_02: And then there's so when you upload onto our our actual like main episode, like the free show that's on Spotify and all that shit, you have to press two different things to publish an episode.
58:30
SPEAKER_02: I missed the first one and I hit save.
58:32
SPEAKER_02: I saved everything was done.
58:34
SPEAKER_02: The all the title, the info in the box, all that shit, the episode title or the episode numbering and the explicit this and that.
58:42
SPEAKER_02: There's like one other thing I had to check instead of like uh the default option is like save for later, and the you have to click over to publish now, publish immediately.
58:54
SPEAKER_02: And I forgot to do that.
58:56
SPEAKER_02: So I hit save and I fucked off.
58:58
SPEAKER_02: I went back to do another shit.
58:59
SPEAKER_02: And then like two days later, Basket messaged me on Discord and he was like, No episode this week.
59:05
SPEAKER_02: I was like, fuck are you talking about, dude?
59:07
SPEAKER_02: We just dropped a banger like three days ago, and I checked and uh we had not, we had not done that.
59:13
SPEAKER_02: Okay, so sorry, Rod.
59:17
SPEAKER_02: It's my fault.
59:18
SPEAKER_02: I fricked up, bud.
59:20
SPEAKER_00: Um, well Arden J was the next commenter.
59:24
SPEAKER_00: Oh, okay.
59:26
SPEAKER_00: Wow, this podcast really made me want to buy Bud Light Platinum from my local Arab man.
59:32
SPEAKER_00: Hey man, again, save your bottle caps.
59:35
SPEAKER_02: I get a penny of those.
59:36
SPEAKER_00: And then and then uh then they said, Can't believe you left out Yukio Mishima off top gaze.
59:44
SPEAKER_00: And I can because I didn't know who that was before I looked it up while Tyler was talking a minute ago.
59:50
SPEAKER_00: Uh he died by suicide by Seppaku, right?
59:53
SPEAKER_00: Oh shit.
59:55
SPEAKER_00: Who is what did he do though?
59:56
SPEAKER_00: He was he was a novelist, a Japanese novelist, playwright, short story writer, actor, martial artist, model, and the leader of an attempted coup d'etat that culminated in his suicide.
1:00:08
SPEAKER_00: I have one question for you, Arden J.
1:00:11
SPEAKER_01: Do I look like a fucking weeb, dude?
1:00:16
SPEAKER_01: I don't know who that is.
1:00:18
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, bro.
1:00:20
SPEAKER_00: Uh I I it was my list, was it not?
1:00:23
SPEAKER_00: The top case.
1:00:24
SPEAKER_00: Does Jake look like a fucking weeb, dude?
1:00:26
SPEAKER_00: I mean, Metal Gear Solid and Pokemon is my Japanese culture.
1:00:30
SPEAKER_00: That's what I think all of Japan is like, is based on those two things.
1:00:34
SPEAKER_00: Uh okay.
1:00:36
SPEAKER_00: Um, and then the next one is more from Reza Br.
1:00:40
SPEAKER_00: That's a new one.
1:00:41
SPEAKER_00: Here is a comment, so you guys don't feel embarrassed.
1:00:44
SPEAKER_00: XO.
1:00:46
SPEAKER_00: Thank you.
1:00:46
SPEAKER_00: Thank you, Reza.
1:00:47
SPEAKER_00: Is that a girl?
1:00:48
SPEAKER_00: Don't know.
1:00:49
SPEAKER_02: Who XO's?
1:00:50
SPEAKER_02: I don't.
1:00:51
SPEAKER_02: I mean, I have no function.
1:00:52
SPEAKER_02: Also, what guy would care if we feel embarrassed?
1:00:55
SPEAKER_02: I think that's a girl.
1:00:56
SPEAKER_02: I don't know.
1:00:58
SPEAKER_00: Don't know.
1:00:59
SPEAKER_00: Okay.
1:00:59
SPEAKER_02: So your snatch smells good.
1:01:02
SPEAKER_02: Sorry, I don't know how to talk to women.
1:01:04
SPEAKER_02: No idea.
1:01:04
SPEAKER_00: I have no idea how to talk to women.
1:01:06
SPEAKER_00: It could go either way.
1:01:07
SPEAKER_00: It could just be a dude being cheeky.
1:01:09
SPEAKER_00: Who knows?
1:01:10
SPEAKER_00: Okay.
1:01:10
SPEAKER_00: Uh, and on I'm Splinter Cell, we have three comments.
1:01:15
SPEAKER_02: We have uh Damn.
1:01:17
SPEAKER_02: All of us we bitched that we didn't get any, and now we got too many.
1:01:20
SPEAKER_02: Uh tone it down.
1:01:21
SPEAKER_02: I'm just kidding, more.
1:01:22
SPEAKER_02: Arden Jay says I was 50 comments next week.
1:01:27
SPEAKER_00: Better be, dude.
1:01:28
SPEAKER_00: Uh, this better get exponential.
1:01:30
SPEAKER_00: Uh Arden Jay says, I was initially against the Spurgy Spooks segment, but now I get a half chub just from the jingle.
1:01:37
SPEAKER_01: Hell yeah.
1:01:38
SPEAKER_00: It grew on them.
1:01:39
SPEAKER_00: We grew on you.
1:01:41
SPEAKER_00: Uh also the new parody is incredible.
1:01:43
SPEAKER_00: Thank you.
1:01:45
SPEAKER_02: I tried.
1:01:45
SPEAKER_02: I tried really hard on it.
1:01:47
SPEAKER_02: I did nothing.
1:01:47
SPEAKER_02: Um, but I'll glory hog him a bunch.
1:01:52
SPEAKER_00: Uh thank you, and you're welcome.
1:01:54
SPEAKER_00: Uh Basket says that intro is my favorite front bottoms cover yet.
1:01:59
SPEAKER_00: Because you play didn't you play a thing on your phone?
1:02:02
SPEAKER_02: Uh yeah.
1:02:04
SPEAKER_02: It was a guy named like Kenneth Keith.
1:02:07
SPEAKER_02: He's dead.
1:02:07
SPEAKER_02: I Googled him.
1:02:08
SPEAKER_02: Oh.
1:02:09
SPEAKER_02: He died in like 2008.
1:02:11
SPEAKER_02: He said, no, Bama.
1:02:13
SPEAKER_02: I don't know why he died or whatever.
1:02:15
SPEAKER_02: But his name was Kenneth Keith.
1:02:17
SPEAKER_02: I remember that because I thought it was funny that he had two really white guy first names for a full name.
1:02:23
SPEAKER_02: Um he may be part of something called front buttoms.
1:02:27
SPEAKER_02: I am unsure.
1:02:28
SPEAKER_02: I just uh found it.
1:02:30
SPEAKER_02: I I came across it.
1:02:31
SPEAKER_02: Oh okay.
1:02:32
SPEAKER_02: Like a paper towel.
1:02:35
SPEAKER_00: Uh did you uh so you're gonna say the thing you uh fucking teased earlier, you're gonna tell me on a fucking Patreon, I guess.
1:02:45
SPEAKER_00: Because I also have an idea.
1:02:47
SPEAKER_00: What?
1:02:48
SPEAKER_00: My idea is I wanna take like body cam footage of when like cops really fuck up like bad and then do voiceovers for them.
1:02:59
SPEAKER_00: Oh like like pause it on their face on the dumbest freeze frame of their face I can find.
1:03:05
SPEAKER_00: I see, and then have just be like, like and make caveman crazy noises.
1:03:11
SPEAKER_00: Maybe, maybe, and upload those as TikToks.
1:03:14
SPEAKER_02: What if what if we do it like this, you know?
1:03:17
SPEAKER_02: Uh and I don't know, but what if we just you and I watch it, say it's like five minutes, ten minutes, whatever.
1:03:25
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
1:03:25
SPEAKER_02: We watch it and we kind of know what's gonna happen.
1:03:28
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
1:03:28
SPEAKER_02: And then we go back and we mute it.
1:03:32
SPEAKER_02: Okay, and as we're watching it again, you do one guy, I do, and like we just keep like as it plays, yeah.
1:03:40
SPEAKER_02: Hunter, what are you doing here?
1:03:43
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
1:03:43
SPEAKER_02: You know, like maybe, maybe that'd be fun.
1:03:45
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, we could we could try that.
1:03:47
SPEAKER_02: Try it at least.
1:03:48
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, let's try it.
1:03:48
SPEAKER_02: I'll just tell you what the other thing was.
1:03:50
SPEAKER_02: Sure.
1:03:51
SPEAKER_02: Cause it's not like I mean, I don't know.
1:03:53
SPEAKER_02: So I had this girl over.
1:03:57
SPEAKER_02: Okay.
1:03:57
SPEAKER_02: And uh sh it was the first time this was a few maybe a month or two ago.
1:04:04
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
1:04:04
SPEAKER_02: It was the first time I'd had this girl stay over.
1:04:09
SPEAKER_02: Uh-huh.
1:04:10
SPEAKER_02: You know, we like we banged, she slept over.
1:04:14
SPEAKER_02: Uh in a while.
1:04:17
SPEAKER_02: I'll say the first time in a while.
1:04:18
SPEAKER_02: I'll throw that out there.
1:04:20
SPEAKER_02: Sure.
1:04:21
SPEAKER_02: And uh she we fell asleep and uh I want to say, like, let's just say we fell asleep at midnight, and then sometime around two, I think what happened, my recollection, my my you know, piecing things together is that she like got up at some point and then came back.
1:04:42
SPEAKER_02: And when she got back in bed, I think it half woke me up.
1:04:46
SPEAKER_02: You know when you're like half awake?
1:04:48
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
1:04:48
SPEAKER_02: I remember I was half awake and she had like big spooned me as the little spoon.
1:04:55
SPEAKER_02: Uh-huh.
1:04:55
SPEAKER_02: Because I'm laying on my right side, she gets back in behind me, and she like cuddles up, and I'm like maybe half awake, because I barely was conscious.
1:05:06
SPEAKER_00: Okay.
1:05:06
SPEAKER_02: All I know is as soon as she completely like snugged up to me, like crotched a butt, I fucking ripped one, dude.
1:05:23
SPEAKER_02: Like a fucking rounded off at the end.
1:05:32
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, like it was asking a question.
1:05:34
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, dude, it had a it had inflection.
1:05:38
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, okay.
1:05:39
SPEAKER_02: And I was internally dying last.
1:05:44
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I bet, dude.
1:05:45
SPEAKER_02: But I had to act unconscious.
1:05:48
SPEAKER_02: Because it's like if she thinks I did this on purpose, yeah, the pussy tap is dry.
1:05:54
SPEAKER_02: Uh huh.
1:05:54
SPEAKER_02: The well is no longer giving.
1:05:57
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
1:05:57
SPEAKER_02: So I just laid there and Like oh fuck.
1:06:01
SPEAKER_02: Like laughed to myself so fucking hard.
1:06:04
SPEAKER_02: Did okay.
1:06:04
SPEAKER_02: Did she ask?
1:06:06
SPEAKER_02: No reaction.
1:06:07
SPEAKER_02: Never brought it up.
1:06:09
SPEAKER_02: Never brought it up.
1:06:11
SPEAKER_02: Never brought it up.
1:06:12
SPEAKER_02: Oh my god, bro.
1:06:13
SPEAKER_02: I'm sure that she immediately like told people like her.
1:06:18
SPEAKER_02: Sure, yeah.
1:06:18
SPEAKER_02: Like her friends or co-workers.
1:06:21
SPEAKER_02: Whoever.
1:06:22
SPEAKER_02: Whoever, you know, she talks about personal stuff to probably knows I fucking blast it on her pussy, dude.
1:06:28
SPEAKER_03: I forgot.
1:06:30
SPEAKER_03: I didn't even think of that.
1:06:32
SPEAKER_03: Oh yeah.
1:06:34
SPEAKER_02: I could have if she if her lips were spread, she would have got felt up like a balloon, dude.
1:06:39
SPEAKER_00: She'd have given her a fucking yeast infection.
1:06:42
SPEAKER_02: She would have had methane in her fucking uterus.
1:06:48
SPEAKER_02: It was a fucking hammer, bro.
1:06:50
SPEAKER_00: She would have been contributing to global warming.
1:06:52
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
1:06:52
SPEAKER_00: For like a few days after.
1:06:54
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
1:06:54
SPEAKER_00: Bleaking it out.
1:06:56
SPEAKER_02: Honestly, if I would have nutted in her before that and then farted in her, I would have killed any like your own spermic?
1:07:04
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, bro.
1:07:06
SPEAKER_00: Just like Monsanto chemicals.
1:07:08
SPEAKER_00: Just fucking call that shit plan F, bro.
1:07:10
SPEAKER_00: Oh man.
1:07:11
SPEAKER_00: Just like fucking uh Agent Orange.
1:07:14
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
1:07:14
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
1:07:15
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
1:07:16
SPEAKER_02: Gas out those little Jew babies inside.
1:07:18
SPEAKER_02: Oh yeah.
1:07:21
SPEAKER_00: It was the Vietnamese, wasn't it?
1:07:23
SPEAKER_02: Uh yeah, it was.
1:07:24
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, but you know, gassing.
1:07:26
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, no, I got you.
1:07:27
SPEAKER_00: I got you.
1:07:28
SPEAKER_02: Brought it back.
1:07:29
SPEAKER_00: Brought it back to the anti-Semitic shit we've been doing.
1:07:31
SPEAKER_00: I see.
1:07:32
SPEAKER_00: That's our gas.
1:07:33
SPEAKER_00: That's our bag.
1:07:34
SPEAKER_00: Dude, it is, dude.
1:07:35
SPEAKER_00: For a while there, the only thing I could write parodies about was Palestine.
1:07:39
SPEAKER_00: For some reason.
1:07:40
SPEAKER_02: Same, dude.
1:07:41
SPEAKER_02: It was all yeah.
1:07:42
SPEAKER_02: I have a lot of there was a lot of Jew stuff.
1:07:45
SPEAKER_00: Even a Christmas.
1:07:46
SPEAKER_00: I I did a Christmas one with that Paul McCartney song.
1:07:49
SPEAKER_02: We have an unreleased parody that we have a lot of the way written that is 100% about gas and gas.
1:07:54
SPEAKER_00: You're right, yeah.
1:07:55
SPEAKER_02: That was your brain child.
1:07:57
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
1:07:58
SPEAKER_02: It just fits so perfectly.
1:08:00
SPEAKER_00: Anyway.
1:08:00
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
1:08:01
SPEAKER_00: That's all I got.
1:08:02
SPEAKER_00: I think I hurt my left ear with that noise I made earlier because it was so loud.
1:08:06
SPEAKER_00: Oh.
1:08:07
SPEAKER_00: My left ear is like a little is like hurting a little bit.
1:08:11
SPEAKER_00: I don't know.
1:08:11
SPEAKER_00: Sorry.
1:08:12
SPEAKER_00: I think it was from when I went like really it was my brr.
1:08:15
SPEAKER_00: No, it definitely was hurting before.
1:08:17
SPEAKER_00: It was right after I did the thing.
1:08:19
SPEAKER_00: I was like, God damn, bruh.
1:08:21
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
1:08:21
SPEAKER_00: That sucks.
1:08:22
SPEAKER_00: I saw we.
1:08:23
SPEAKER_00: No, it's my fault.
1:08:24
SPEAKER_00: I I did the noise.
1:08:27
SPEAKER_02: Let me ask you this.
1:08:28
SPEAKER_02: This is this is like overtime.
1:08:31
SPEAKER_02: Sure.
1:08:32
SPEAKER_02: But so whenever somebody maybe this is autism on my part.
1:08:38
SPEAKER_02: But whenever someone's like, bad thing happened to me, my reaction is always like, oh man, I'm sorry to hear that.
1:08:47
SPEAKER_02: And they're always just like, it's not your fault.
1:08:49
SPEAKER_02: It's like, I know.
1:08:51
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I didn't say I'm sorry that I did that.
1:08:54
SPEAKER_02: Right.
1:08:54
SPEAKER_02: I said I'm sorry to hear that that happened to you.
1:08:56
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
1:08:57
SPEAKER_00: Is that am I wrong?
1:08:59
SPEAKER_00: No, no.
1:09:00
SPEAKER_00: I've definitely had that happen.
1:09:01
SPEAKER_00: People say, well, it's not your fault.
1:09:03
SPEAKER_00: Like I know.
1:09:04
SPEAKER_00: Who implied that it was my fault?
1:09:05
SPEAKER_00: I'm a hundred percent aware I did nothing of the story.
1:09:08
SPEAKER_00: I wasn't involved.
1:09:10
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
1:09:10
SPEAKER_00: Till now, till you just told me what happened.
1:09:12
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
1:09:13
SPEAKER_00: You just told me the information I would need to feel sorry.
1:09:17
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
1:09:18
SPEAKER_00: How could it possibly be my fault?
1:09:20
SPEAKER_02: All right.
1:09:20
SPEAKER_02: I just wanted to make sure I wasn't like misunderstanding a social situation.
1:09:25
SPEAKER_00: No, it's just someone just What else am I supposed to say?
1:09:28
SPEAKER_00: What it is is like someone just had some fucked up shit happen to them, and social convention and and semantics is not on top of the mind.
1:09:38
SPEAKER_02: Is there a better reaction than like, hey man, or hey, this this you know, how are you doing?
1:09:45
SPEAKER_02: Oh, not too great.
1:09:46
SPEAKER_02: My my I've got a really bad migraine because somebody uh was really loud in my ear and it woke me up or something.
1:09:53
SPEAKER_02: And I'm like, oh, I'm sorry to hear that.
1:09:55
SPEAKER_02: They're like, it's not your fault.
1:09:56
SPEAKER_02: And it's like, yeah, what else am I supposed to say in that situation that's better that doesn't elicit any reaction?
1:10:03
SPEAKER_00: I think some people just I have empathy for you.
1:10:06
SPEAKER_00: Do I robot it?
1:10:07
SPEAKER_00: Sometimes it's a joke, I think.
1:10:09
SPEAKER_00: I think sometimes I have had it said to me and I knew it was a joke.
1:10:13
SPEAKER_00: Like they were like, it's not your fault.
1:10:16
SPEAKER_00: Like, cause it couldn't be.
1:10:18
SPEAKER_00: What if they're in on it?
1:10:19
SPEAKER_02: What if I know for a fact in this situation that I'm describing, it's not.
1:10:23
SPEAKER_00: No, I know.
1:10:23
SPEAKER_00: Most of the time it's not.
1:10:24
SPEAKER_00: I've definitely had it happen where it's not.
1:10:26
SPEAKER_00: But I have had it happen where it was for sure.
1:10:31
SPEAKER_02: Uh I just don't know what else to say in that situation.
1:10:35
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, no.
1:10:36
SPEAKER_02: I well, sometimes I just say, Oh, that sucks.
1:10:38
SPEAKER_02: Well, I'm sorry.
1:10:40
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, see, right.
1:10:41
SPEAKER_02: See?
1:10:41
SPEAKER_02: That's what you do.
1:10:42
SPEAKER_02: It's like it feels like the right thing to say.
1:10:44
SPEAKER_02: And sometimes we're just like, oh, that stinks, you know.
1:10:47
SPEAKER_00: Or yeah.
1:10:49
SPEAKER_02: It'll be get a it'll get better.
1:10:51
SPEAKER_00: Just agree that it's not your fault.
1:10:53
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
1:10:53
SPEAKER_02: Yep.
1:10:54
SPEAKER_02: Well, I'm just meaning like instead of saying sorry, yeah.
1:10:58
SPEAKER_02: Like, ah, that sucks.
1:11:00
SPEAKER_02: I say that to dudes all the time.
1:11:01
SPEAKER_00: Well, you grab their collar and you slam them against the wall and you go, I fucking know it's not my fault.
1:11:07
SPEAKER_00: Do you want something else to go wrong?
1:11:09
SPEAKER_00: Stop implying that it's my fucking fault.
1:11:11
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
1:11:12
SPEAKER_02: That's what you do.
1:11:13
SPEAKER_02: Kind of like when kids are already crying and the parents are like, I'll give you something to cry about.
1:11:17
SPEAKER_00: Exactly.
1:11:17
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
1:11:18
SPEAKER_00: Tough love, dude.
1:11:19
SPEAKER_00: Give your friends tough love.
1:11:21
SPEAKER_00: If they say, it's not your fault, fucking grab them and slam them against the wall so they never do it again.
1:11:27
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
1:11:28
SPEAKER_00: They never defy logic like that.
1:11:30
SPEAKER_00: And like now's the time to be on your game, bro.
1:11:34
SPEAKER_00: Like, you need to kind of set the conditions for the universe to be on your side again.
1:11:39
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
1:11:40
SPEAKER_02: I'm going to give you a little bonus advice.
1:11:42
SPEAKER_02: Sure.
1:11:42
SPEAKER_02: When you slam your friend up against the wall, and you hold him there, look down.
1:11:47
SPEAKER_02: Because if he has a boner, you can't be friends with that guy anymore.
1:11:54
SPEAKER_00: Or you start kissing him, depending on how you feel about it.
1:11:56
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, you can feel out the vibe.
1:11:58
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
1:11:58
SPEAKER_00: If you if you're into it, then you just have to check.
1:12:02
SPEAKER_00: You should just check.
1:12:03
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, then fucking, you know, pull your hair back and get to town or whatever.
1:12:07
SPEAKER_00: But like if you're if you're not into it, for sure you can't be friends with them anymore.
1:12:13
SPEAKER_00: Just just remember to check.
1:12:15
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
1:12:16
SPEAKER_00: No, my uh just to go back to this.
1:12:19
SPEAKER_00: My thing was I was gonna do like dumb voices for the cops and like uh play on what happens in the video and shit, you know.
1:12:27
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, like number thing, and you know, whatever, like trying to make them seem stupid.
1:12:34
SPEAKER_00: But I was gonna do it completely anonymously, and I'm telling like a hundred and some odd people right now, but I was gonna do it completely anonymously on TikTok, so no one knew it was me.
1:12:42
SPEAKER_00: It was just like cops suck or whatever, you know, something more clever than that, but you know what I mean.
1:12:47
SPEAKER_00: Like some some tailor, like you know, a themed profile and see what I make happen with just fucking editing dash cam footage or body cam footage and making fun of them, you know?
1:13:01
SPEAKER_00: I like it.
1:13:02
SPEAKER_00: Why not get out some of my energy on that doing that so then I don't have to beleaguer people's ear holes with it, like you and my chick, and you know, that's you know.
1:13:13
SPEAKER_02: I don't think that would change.
1:13:14
SPEAKER_00: Get it out of my system.
1:13:16
SPEAKER_02: I don't think that's going anywhere.
1:13:18
SPEAKER_02: But I think it would be a fun outlet for making fun of the cops.
1:13:22
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
1:13:22
SPEAKER_02: I think I would name the page.
1:13:24
SPEAKER_02: Me cop.
1:13:28
SPEAKER_00: Me cop, me cop.
1:13:30
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, because then you can just be like me cop, me cop, me kill no something.
1:13:38
SPEAKER_00: Uh there's something there.
1:13:39
SPEAKER_00: That's for sure.
1:13:40
SPEAKER_00: Caveman cop.
1:13:42
SPEAKER_00: There's something there.
1:13:43
SPEAKER_02: You can make the voice like um like those dudes with the speech impediment, and you can name the page Stop Resisting.
1:13:50
SPEAKER_00: Ooh, that's great.
1:13:53
SPEAKER_00: The hair lip?
1:13:54
SPEAKER_00: I didn't even think about the hair lip.
1:13:56
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
1:13:56
SPEAKER_00: But uh I was just gonna do more of just a dumb voice, just try to be, you know, developmentally challenged.
1:14:03
SPEAKER_02: Ooh, woo, show me your hands.
1:14:05
SPEAKER_00: Because the whole joke is that you barely have to get any education, you can be a fucking moron and be a cop.
1:14:10
SPEAKER_00: And you know what I mean?
1:14:11
SPEAKER_00: Like that that's what I would play on with this thing.
1:14:14
SPEAKER_00: Uh just just each video would be like a minute and a half of the highlights from the dash cam and me fucking doing or you if you want to be in on it, uh, doing fucking voice commentary over it, you know.
1:14:28
SPEAKER_02: I didn't realize I was originally not invited and I invited myself to the party.
1:14:32
SPEAKER_00: No, no, no, no.
1:14:33
SPEAKER_00: I just thought of it as a thing I could do, you know what I mean?
1:14:37
SPEAKER_00: Like creatively with my time, you know.
1:14:40
SPEAKER_02: Make one and I'll judge it.
1:14:41
SPEAKER_00: Okay.
1:14:42
SPEAKER_00: Well, it could be like uh like the uh fucking crass project where I'm working on it, but then I'm like, hey, could you come in and do this thing on this thing or whatever?
1:14:52
SPEAKER_02: If you need me to do anything, I'll do whatever.
1:14:54
SPEAKER_00: Generally on a project at all, which this probably won't happen, but I'm just saying, generally, when you start a project, it's kind of like there's a Trey Parker and a Matt Stone of the thing.
1:15:04
SPEAKER_00: You know what I mean?
1:15:04
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
1:15:05
SPEAKER_00: Uh yeah.
1:15:07
SPEAKER_00: You get it.
1:15:08
SPEAKER_02: I will involve myself if I am requested to be involved.
1:15:12
SPEAKER_00: You should, but you you were never not you were never disinvited.
1:15:16
SPEAKER_00: I just thought of the idea, and I was like, hey, I'm gonna bring that up and see if he has any punching up to do with the idea.
1:15:22
SPEAKER_02: I think that I think that it will organically get funnier the more we fuck around with it.
1:15:28
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
1:15:29
SPEAKER_02: You have the initial idea.
1:15:30
SPEAKER_00: Well, you were getting the cop shit in your algo at this point as well.
1:15:34
SPEAKER_02: Dude.
1:15:35
SPEAKER_00: You could fucking have some, you know, some good ones.
1:15:38
SPEAKER_02: My phone listens.
1:15:40
SPEAKER_02: My phone does doesn't just hear me, it listens.
1:15:44
SPEAKER_02: Does that make sense?
1:15:45
SPEAKER_02: Cause like I said I prefer the ones where the dudes are just minding their own business and but then they're also like upped on their shit.
1:15:53
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
1:15:54
SPEAKER_02: That's all I get now.
1:15:55
SPEAKER_00: Nice dude.
1:15:56
SPEAKER_02: Dude, this guy in an RV just parked it and was sleeping, and they fucking like banged on his window, and you know, righteous indignation, always attractive to me.
1:16:07
SPEAKER_02: Love it.
1:16:08
SPEAKER_02: Because it's righteous.
1:16:09
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
1:16:10
SPEAKER_02: Uh and essentially the long, the long, the short story of the long is they were like harassing the shit out of him, and he was like, What the fuck do you want?
1:16:22
SPEAKER_02: And they were like, We want ID, and he's like, No.
1:16:25
SPEAKER_02: And they were like, Well, what are you doing here?
1:16:28
SPEAKER_02: And he's like, What the fuck does it look like I'm doing here?
1:16:32
SPEAKER_02: And they were like, Well, you're on private property, and he's like, Okay, well, did the owner ask me to leave?
1:16:37
SPEAKER_02: And they were like, No.
1:16:38
SPEAKER_02: And they were like, But you're trespassing, and he's like, Well, you just that's not how the law works, right?
1:16:44
SPEAKER_02: Because I have to have been asked to leave and then refuse in order to be criminally trespassed.
1:16:48
SPEAKER_02: And they were like, Well, we're asking you to leave now, and he's like, Well, you're blocking me in and I can't leave, so why don't you fucking move and I will leave?
1:16:56
SPEAKER_02: And they're like, Well, we need to see ID, and he's like, Do you not see how we're in a fucking vicious circle here?
1:17:01
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
1:17:01
SPEAKER_02: That's that's how it goes.
1:17:03
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
1:17:04
SPEAKER_02: It's a good one.
1:17:04
SPEAKER_02: But he was just mining, you know what I'm saying?
1:17:06
SPEAKER_02: Like, he wasn't out hunting for bullshit.
1:17:09
SPEAKER_02: That would be an easy one to do, I feel like.
1:17:11
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
1:17:12
SPEAKER_00: Because it uh it would help if you have two dash cam or two body cams.
1:17:16
SPEAKER_00: Right.
1:17:17
SPEAKER_00: Because then you can switch between the angles at the like crucial moments in the video uh and switch back and forth, and and they can be like just two dumbasses at that point.
1:17:29
SPEAKER_00: At that point, it's two.
1:17:31
SPEAKER_00: Oftentimes it's just gonna be one.
1:17:33
SPEAKER_00: Right.
1:17:33
SPEAKER_00: It's just gonna be footage of one, and you just catch catch them.
1:17:37
SPEAKER_00: I I thought it would be funny.
1:17:39
SPEAKER_00: Maybe not every video would call for it, but catch them in the funniest freeze frame.
1:17:45
SPEAKER_00: I mentioned that earlier, but that is that's gold, I think.
1:17:48
SPEAKER_00: To catch them in the the funniest freeze frame, you could create a meme, you know, like that image could be like, oh fuck, like and people would like rip it for other memes and shit.
1:17:58
SPEAKER_02: I like your idea.
1:18:00
SPEAKER_00: I'm down.
1:18:01
SPEAKER_00: Because it's it's right there, dude.
1:18:03
SPEAKER_00: And like uh correct me if I'm wrong, but I don't I feel like that's public once it's out, you know, once the foyer request is done and everything, like that's out there, that's public.
1:18:14
SPEAKER_00: Like that's we can just use that for whatever, right?
1:18:18
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, it's also right, it's also super transformative because you're maybe you're using part of the video, but it's not like you're just ripping someone's video and re-uploading it, which is completely against fair use.
1:18:31
SPEAKER_02: Right.
1:18:31
SPEAKER_02: Even if you did use a big chunk of the video and you completely changed the audio from front to back, again, major fair use there.
1:18:38
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
1:18:38
SPEAKER_02: But if we're mainly just using still frames, it's like untouchable.
1:18:42
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
1:18:43
SPEAKER_02: Even if it was a fucking Sony movie picture, and we took two still frames from that and made our own video out of it, a hundred percent fair use.
1:18:52
SPEAKER_00: Okay.
1:18:53
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I I just I'm like, is that I don't know.
1:18:58
SPEAKER_00: We'd probably have to start making them and see if it has legs.
1:19:00
SPEAKER_00: I sure as fuck would be fun, at least for the first time.
1:19:04
SPEAKER_00: Just find really good ones and like I uh how we get the video is is the other thing.
1:19:10
SPEAKER_00: Like, I guess you have to like download the YouTube video.
1:19:14
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, it's not hard.
1:19:15
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
1:19:15
SPEAKER_00: Like you would uh YouTube to MP3 or whatever, but you just download the MP4, I guess.
1:19:21
SPEAKER_00: Yep.
1:19:21
SPEAKER_00: Cool.
1:19:22
SPEAKER_00: Then we could just do that.
1:19:23
SPEAKER_00: Hell yeah.
1:19:24
SPEAKER_00: And we can just use these fucking audit the auditor fucks, use their footage that they got somehow, which they probably did the same shit.
1:19:32
SPEAKER_00: They just did that with the dash cam or the body cam video that was uploaded by the sheriff's office or whatever, yeah, or the lawyer that FOIA did or whatever.
1:19:41
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
1:19:42
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, we'll milk the milkers.
1:19:44
SPEAKER_02: However, make sure it's lactose free.
1:19:47
SPEAKER_02: Hell yeah, dude.
1:19:49
SPEAKER_02: Uh I'm like, I live like three blocks from you, and I might fall asleep on the way there.
1:19:55
SPEAKER_02: I'm so fucking tired, dude.
1:19:56
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, all right.
1:19:57
SPEAKER_02: Uh if you want to hear more about me being tired, go to patreon.com slash fartmouth.
1:20:03
SPEAKER_00: It's the most riveting part of the Patreon this week.
1:20:06
SPEAKER_02: I just yapped and yapped and yapped about how tired I am.
1:20:08
SPEAKER_02: Uh but yeah, patreon.com slash fartmouth.
1:20:11
SPEAKER_02: Uh sign up a dollar, five dollars, ten dollars, whatever you want to give.
1:20:14
SPEAKER_02: It was be cool.
1:20:15
SPEAKER_02: There's more content.
1:20:15
SPEAKER_02: If you like the content, why not more?
1:20:18
SPEAKER_02: Is what I say to that.
1:20:20
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
1:20:20
SPEAKER_02: There's no term limits on our content.
1:20:23
SPEAKER_00: No.
1:20:24
SPEAKER_02: Four more years.
1:20:25
SPEAKER_00: It's pretty evergreen, honestly.
1:20:27
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
1:20:27
SPEAKER_02: In general.
1:20:28
SPEAKER_02: Um, but we like you.
1:20:30
SPEAKER_02: Thank you for listening.
1:20:31
SPEAKER_02: Leave more Spotify comments.
1:20:32
SPEAKER_02: We enjoy them.
1:20:33
SPEAKER_02: That was a good time.
1:20:34
SPEAKER_02: There's some good ones there for sure.
1:20:36
SPEAKER_02: And um I don't know.
1:20:40
SPEAKER_02: Text your mom.
1:20:41
SPEAKER_02: Say, hey, how are you today?
1:20:45
SPEAKER_02: Clean your sheets.
1:20:46
SPEAKER_02: Or if she's dead, do it anyway, because if she texts you back, that would be fucking crazy, dude.
1:20:52
SPEAKER_02: What the hell?
1:20:53
SPEAKER_00: Someone else has her number.
1:20:55
SPEAKER_02: Oh shit.
1:20:56
SPEAKER_00: Back from the dub.
1:20:57
SPEAKER_00: What's up, moms?
1:20:58
SPEAKER_00: Is it a good smelling black guy?
1:21:00
SPEAKER_00: Could be.
1:21:01
SPEAKER_00: That's for you to find out.
1:21:02
SPEAKER_00: Text your dead mom.
1:21:03
SPEAKER_00: Meet up at Leroy's.
1:21:06
SPEAKER_00: Have a cult 45.
1:21:08
SPEAKER_02: All right.
1:21:09
SPEAKER_02: Bye, everybody.